"I want to be a mother...NOW!"

by Dr Atlas

Rating: teen
Tags: Comedy, Romance, Sex, Flash Sentry, Random, Twilight Sparkle, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 2469

(A threequel to "I want to be an uncle.) Knowing that there is now way out of this, Flash travels to Twilight's house and prepares for the worst, only to find out that she has the same intentions as the rest of her family.

With an order from Shining, and no help from Cadance, Flash sets of on his "mission" to go to Twilight's.
Unfortunately, the situation goes in a completely different direction than he thought.

Authors regrets: Here it is. The "Threequil" that I'm sure many (or no one) wanted.
At first, I didn't really want to write this fic, seeing as how this is probably frowned upon, but I knew others wanted to see some conclusion to all of this, and it was kinda fun writing, so here it is. The last of the "I want to be a" Series...hopefully.

Published 2015-02-14 16:20:02 UTC
Last updated 2015-02-14 16:20:02 UTC

Knock Knock

“Well...here I go.”

Flash silently knocked on the tree house door and listened for three seconds before turning around. “WELP! Looks like nopony’s home, guess I’ll have to tell Shining that-”

“Hold on! I’m coming!”

Flash froze, recognizing that voice instantly. “Oh colt...here we go…” Flash was far from prepared for this. The moment he got off the train he thought about getting back on and moving to a different town, or city, or world! As long as it prevented him from meeting-

His thought was interrupted by the door opening. “Sorry I took so long, Spike’s out and I was too bui...sy…...F-Flash?”

Flash stood motionless as she opened the door, not wanting to say anything. All he could do was stare right in her eyes. Her big, bright, gleaming, beautiful-

He shook his head and cleared his throat, knowing this silence needed to break. “Uh...h-hi Twilight- or...uh, ahem, princess Twilight...heh…”

Flash smiled nervously and Twilight continued staring at him, her jaw dropped and her eyes bigger than ever. Flash was about to speak up again, but she immediately slammed the door in his face. Flash stepped back in surprise. “Whew...thank Celestia, I thought for sure she would-”

The door opened again seconds later, making Flash’s hopes of leaving plummet. He then realized that the purple mare was now soaking wet from mane to tail with a towel around her torso and lidded eyes looking deep into his. “Oh sorry,” Twilight said. “I-I just stepped out of the shower...I didn’t really expect company at this hour.”

Flash stood his ground, even though every fiber of his being wanted him to make a run for it. “Uh...n-nice rhyme. I-I’m sorry that I-”

“Oh, you don’t need to apologize, Flash. How was I supposed to know you would catch me...off guard.” She stepped closer to him and smiled.

Flash stepped back, knowing this was about to become a disaster. “Maybe I should just get back on the train and move to another town.” He thought. “W-Well, s-since you’re busy, I-I guess I’ll go and-”

“Oh, don’t leave now, you haven’t even been inside me ye-” Twilight coughed. “Inside my home yet.”

Flash was hoping that was another spelling error. “Uh...w-why would you want me insi-”

“Come on, Flash, we haven’t talked to each other in so long. The least I could do is let you in me- my home”

“B-But we didn’t even-”

Before Flash could finish, Twilight grabbed his arm. “Pretty please.”

Flash cringed as he looked into her eyes again, they blinked twice and were wide as ever. “Listen, princess Twilight-”

“Just call me Twilight.” She said, slowly pulling him closer to the doorway.

“Look, Twilight, I’m kinda here on…royal business.”

Twilight stopped pulling and tilted her head. “Royal business, in Ponyville?”

Flash cleared his throat. “Y-you see, the prince...your uh...ahem...brother, told me to-”

“My brother? He sent you here?” She let go of him and adjusted her towel around her waist. “Why did he send you here.”

At that point, Flash realized this could be his ticket out of here “If she knows about this, then maybe...just maybe…” He smiled, knowing this would be good. “Your brother told me to come to you and...well, uh…”

“Well what?”

Flash blushed, knowing this would be awkward. “Uh...To...um...do...something…”

“Which is?”

“Uh...h-how do I put this…” Flash bit his lip, trying to take as much time as possible with this.

Twilight crossed her arms. “What? Did he tell you to come to my house and seduce me?”

Flash froze. “H-how did she figure that out so fast!?” He took a breath and said, “W-what?” rather stupidly.

“I asked if my brother told you to seduce me?”

“Uh...u-u-uh w-w-well…”

Twilight glared at him. “Did he tell you to SEDUCE ME!”

Flash looked at her in fear, she stared down at him, her eyes as serious as ever. Flash only responded with a nod. “Y-yeah he-h-how do you-”

Twilight stepped back and groaned. “UUGH! Stupid brother, thinking he knows what I want.”

“T-Twilight, h-how did you find out so-”

“What did he tell you?” Twilight flared her horn and grabbed his chest plate with her magic, pulling him into her house and slamming the door shut.

At this point, Flash was really starting to feel terrified, with a soaking wet alicorn trying to ask you something. He thought that at any moment now she would use her magic to rip him to shreds. “H-he just told me to-”

“To what!? To come into my home and try and get me laid!”

Flash was starting to think this whole family was crazy, blood related or not. “He...he, I just-”

“Cause I’m telling you right now, I don’t need him telling me what I want!”

Flash started hyperventilating. He could almost see her eyes glow white. “S-so you don’t-”

“I can ask you whenever I want, not when he want’s to.”

“W-what!?” Flash was starting to get annoyed from saying that word.

Twilight pushed him away and sat down. “I’ll admit Flash, I was starting to think you were a little too shy when I first saw you.”

“Shy? I-I wasn’t shy, you were the one who-”

Twilight sighed. “And I know after our little bump in you wouldn’t stop thinking about me.”

“The...th...thinking about you!?”

“And I’m sure sooner or later you would be coming by on your own,” She groaned again. “but I guess Shining just had to speed up the process with you.”

Flashes mouth couldn’t close with all these things Twilight was telling him. “P-Process…”

Twilight looked at him. “Well, Flash, I did the math, and I was sure you would come running here after realizing you had a thing for me about.” She patted her hoof a couple times. “About one day from now.”

“B-but I don’t have a thing for-”

“And, I have to admit, I...I kinda feel the same way.”

“Listen. Y-You don’t understand, I’m not in...to…” Flash backed up. “Y-You don’t hate me?”

Twilight cocked her head. “What makes you think I hate you?” Twilight then realized this and faced hoofed. “Let me guess, is it because you think you’re not good enough?”

Flash had to think about that. “Uh...I-I don’t know if...’good enough’ is-”

“Or is it because you thought that me being important made you feel like you had no chance.”

“Important, w-what are you saying?”

“Or is it because you thought others would hate me being with you.”

Flash shook his head in confusion. “I-I don’t understand…”

“Well, let me tell you something, you don’t need to give me a reason as to why you’re here, I already know.”

Flash blinked. “Y-you do?”

Twilight shrugged. “And I can probably guess what you’re here for...right.” Twilight smiled and flared her horn, casting away her towel and and stretching her front arms in the air.

Flash responded with a scarlet face and planting his hooves in front of his body. “Uhm...uh...I-I’m not here for anything, j-just to talk..heh…” Flash gulped, feeling a bit uneased with this. “H-How did she change this subject so fast!? We were just talking about why she thinks I have a thing for her, WHICH I DON'T! It’s as if she doesn’t want others to-”

“I’m sure you’re here for more than that, right?” Twilight raised an eye. Making Flash’s train of thought vanish.

He sighed and looked down. "Maybe telling her the truth might help."He cleared his throat and started. “Alright, look, don’t feel offended by this, alright. It’s his idea.” He took a breath and said, “Shining told me that he wants a fowl to-”

“You mean foal.”

Flash stepped back. “W-What?”

Twilight rolled her eyes. “It’s foal, not fowl, we’re not raising a chicken here, Flash.”

Flash stepped back again. “R-Raising!? W-What makes you think we-”

“Come on now, Flash, I’m a smart mare, I know exactly what you want, and what you want is what I want, and what I want is…” She craned her neck upstairs. “Up there.”

“Y-you really want to-”

“Have sex?” Twilight continued smiling and lidded her eyes. “What do you think?”

Flash started shaking. “L-Listen, I-I don’t u-understand, w-what makes you t-t-think I want to-”

“What is with your stuttering!” She yelled. “Don’t you know being repetitive is annoying. I don’t want something like that in a stallion.”

“S-So you don’t want me?” Flash felt some relief, only to get more stressed as Twilight came closer to him.

“Oh no, don’t take it like that, I do want you, I just want you to learn just what I want in a stallion.”

Flash dropped his jaw. “W-what you want? What about me? Can’t I decide what I want?”

Twilight stomped her hoof and flared her horn, making Flash yelp. Seconds later, he felt all his armor come off him and get flung to the walls of the room; his helmet was taken off and thrown to the ceiling, where it then fell to the floor next to him. Flash sat motionless as Twilight came closer to him. “Flash, I know this probably isn’t what you expect from me.”

Flash started losing it. “You’re right! It’s not! Why are you-”

“But you need to know I’m doing this for the good of our foal.”

“How is that helping our f- wait, I-I haven’t even decided if I want something like this! A-and what makes you think I-”

“Flash, you were the one who came to me, asking to-”

“It was your brothers idea!”

“You can drop that excuse, Flash, I know you-”

“Now you’re sounding just like your sister!”

“So now you’re bringing my sister-in-law into this?”

Flash grinded his teeth, he was getting sick of this mare not believing a thing he said. “I’m telling the truth! Shining told me...no. ORDERED me to come to you, and Cadance only made it worse by telling me what to do, and now you’re telling me that I’m lying! I don’t know how to say this, Twilight, but I am telling the TRUTH!”

There was silence after that. Both of them could only look at one another. Flash was breathing heavy and Twilight only raised an eye at him. After some time, Twilight sighed. “I guess stallions just get so caught up in their made up stories that they can’t even-”

“THAT’S IT!” Flash lost it, he stomped the floor and ran straight up to Twilight, his face inches away from her’s. “Listen here, Princess! I have something to say...”

Twilight raised an eye as Flash started ranting, she wasn’t listening much, mainly because some of the things Flash was saying were complete gibberish. “What’s he so worked up about?” She thought. “He seems pretty stressed out with all of this. With him trying to get in bed with me, he probably doesn’t understand that I can see it in his eyes, those big, blue, beautiful eyes. Maybe he just doesn’t want to admit it yet. Such a shy little guy.” She tapped her chin, trying to think of something.

Meanwhile, Flash’s sight was starting to drift away to the ceiling as he talked. “I don’t care what the captain, or his wife, or even what you say, I want a choice in this matter for Celestia’s sake!”

Twilight frowned. “I hate seeing him so mad, and he really does sound like he wants me, maybe I can...can…” Her eyes drifted down and her face put on a wicked smile, she knew just how to calm this stallion down. “Maybe a direct approach is in order.”

Flash closed his eyes and sighed, just as Twilight started bringing her head down. “So, for the last time, I don’t want to-AH!”

Flash stood motionless, his legs were unable to move, his body frozen, his head in the air, his eyesight straight ahead, his jaw dropped, and his brain on shutdown, all because of what he was feeling right now.

As for Twilight, she grinned and continued. “You feeling better now?” She asked.

Flash still couldn’t comprehend thought, so he only nodded in response. Making Twilight giggle. “I thought so, something like this really helps a colt like you calm down, you were just feeling so stressed out.”

Flash felt his senses go up once she put emphasis on her ‘so’ He continued standing motionless as the alicorn continued. He knew he had to say something, this would be even more awkward if it was silent. “A-a….a...are-are you...g...g..giving me a-”

“Leg massage?”

Flash slowly looked behind him to see Twilight moving her hooves around his legs as seductive as possible. She looked at him and winked. “Your legs looked pretty tense from all that yelling, I just thought you needed some help was all.” She stood up and moved her hooves to his shoulders. “Your back’s the same way, all that yelling and nonsense you were saying really strains yourself.”

“N-nonsense?” Flash wasn't sure how to react to that. His mind was too focused on what was happening to him to even see what was going on, before he knew it. Twilight walked in front of him, sliding her still wet tail under his chin. “I’ll be upstairs if you want more.” She smiled and made her way to the staircase as Flash sat in the middle of the room, completely stunned as to what happened to him.

He turned to the top of the stairs to see Twilight make her way into her room, he then glanced over at the front door, then to his helmet, which was still next to him. He looked forward, still trying to process what happened to him.

“I-I…I don’t understand, w-why do I feel so calm now, I-I should be angry, this mare didn’t hear a word I said, and she still thinks I’m a liar.” He turned to the front door. “I should leave right now and leave all this behind me...but…” He turned to the staircase. “Maybe there is some way to show her I’m telling the truth, and she is pretty good with her hooves," He shook his head. "NO! Bad flash, don't even think about something like that! I shouldn't even do this...Though I wouldn’t be surprised if Shining sent the royal guard to track me down for not finishing this assignment.” He looked at his helmet, feeling some deja vu from doing so.

Flash took a deep breath and put the helmet back on. Knowing what he had to do. “I am finding a new job after this…” With that in mind, he took the first step and prepared for what would soon happen.

Author's Note

Yup. That's how it ends, you decide what happens.
as for me...I'm done.
No more.
This was a nightmare to write, and I ain't writing more.
I'm out.
See you in a fic that ain't like this.