How to get to Equestria

by Obscure

Rating: mature
Tags: Other, Sex, Random, Pinkie Pie, Human, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Dark
Length: 1471

A pamphlet from the local library leads to Equestria

A pamphlet from the local library leads to Equestria. Sex happens.

Published 2012-05-04 08:44:02 UTC
Last updated 2012-05-04 08:44:02 UTC

Chapter 1

There was a swirling gut wrenching sensation and for a moment everything tasted purple to Jack. The light was different. It was dark. Like the real dark you only get dozens of miles away from the city. The stone surface beneath his feet felt old, like bedrock. It looked like a circle, a raised platform, shaped by intent or nature out of the raw stone of the earth. Beyond that there was rustling, tall dark shapes swaying in the breeze. The air was humid and rich with the smell of things living wild. Above was a full moon sending her silver light through the canopy.

“It couldn't have worked,” Jack reminded himself quietly, “and it couldn't be that easy.” Sure the trees looked pretty Everfreeish and the moon looked a bit bigger and he had just followed the steps in the “How to get to Equestria” pamphlet, but that was no reason to jump to conclusions.

Reassured by the weight of his pack, Jack made slow silent steps forward to explore this new environment. Reminding himself that every forest had it's predators and that it was best not to alert them to ones presence. His hand reached into his pocket and felt the reassuring hardness of his pocket knife.

He felt the stone surface give way to a carpet of wet moss. Down a few steps full of vines and branches that seemed to placed specifically to trip him. Slowly across the forest floor he crept wondering in what direction he was supposed to be going to get to the nearest town, Ponyville or not.

It would be easiest and safest to search in the daylight, maybe climb a tree and see if he could make out Canterlot on the horizon or something. He'd just have to find a safe place to wait out the night. And that was when the branch broke under his foot.

There was creak of metal on metal and a bloom of yellow light.

A lantern.

Jack had looked into the flame, and thus lost his night vision. His knuckles whitened as he gripped the pocket knife.

Something charged and tackled him to the ground. He grasped blindly, his hand came free of his pocket, knife in hand as he prepared to defend his life.

Something soft under his hand, like curls and under it soft yielding flesh.

“Hi! I'm Pinkie Pie! I've been looking everywhere for you! I heard you were new here! Do you like cupcakes! I like cupcakes! I'm just so glad to have a new pony to give my cupcakes to! Well you're not a pony are you? But you're kinda okay anyway! So do you, do you, do you?”

The knife fell to the ground.

“Yeah. Yeah, I like cupcakes.” Jack wrapped the pony in a tight hug. “I love cupcakes.”

“Oh, you're a sweetie aren't you!” the pink pony returned the hug.

Jack was so happy. His favorite pony in his arms. It was like a dream but better because it was real. It really was too. He could tell because of the broken branch digging into his side so painfully.

And she was so soft and lovely, like with how she was nuzzling his neck like that and how she blew on his ear before licking it...

“Pinkie... what are you doing?” Jack started to gently push the pony away. This was going in a weird direction.

“But you came from so far away! I just want to give you an extra special 'Pinkie Pie Welcome to Equestria Party!' It's not every day somepony comes from so far. I wanted to do something special just for you. You want the party right?” She looked at him with her big blue eyes. There was a slight shimmer hinting that tears where an option.

“I... ah...” Jack thought hard. Sex with a pony. That was odd. He wasn't sure how he felt about that. Sure she was soft and cute and he loved the hell out of her and she wanted to totally make out with him and she was straddling his waist with her cute pony hips and he had the most inexplicable boner and she was kinda wiggling a bit against him and dear god she had his boners attention! 'But... but pony!' complained an uptight part of his mind before the rest of his mind told it to shut the hell up.

Jack kissed the pony. It was weird. Her mouth wasn't quite what he expected. Her tongue was strong and forceful, her teeth were perfectly hard and straight. Her breath was sweet and tasted of vanilla.

“I... will never refuse a Pinkie Pie party,” Jack solemnly vowed, panting faintly. His hands where buried in her mane and his eyes drank of her eyes.

Pinkie grinned, a hint of nervousness flashed but she powered through it with a giggle. Eyes locked she inched back.

“I want to try something super duper special,” she said as she opened Jacks pants with her teeth.

Jack wanted to suggest that maybe Pinkie was going a little fast. No, wait... No, he didn't. He wanted Pinkie to go just as fast as she wanted to.

She struggled a little pulling down his underwear with her hoof. Jack helped her out.

“Oooh! Not bad...” she murmured as her eyes focused in his firmly erect member. She laughed watching it wobble after she poked it with her hoof.

And then he got a new appreciation for how strange the inside of a ponies mouth was.

It was so firmly textured. Of course it was, hay was kinda sharp. Need a good strong mouth to prevent puncture...

It felt so good to be pressed between it and her tongue as she bobbed her head up and down.

Jack smiled. Pinkie had told a little fib. She'd totally done this before. She was incredible at sucking cock. She must have had a lot of practice.

And then his jaw dropped open as Pinkie slid all the way down and he felt himself slide down her throat. Pinkie Pie didn't even blink. Just kept her clear blue eyes on his.

Oh, right. No gag reflex.

A few more strokes, over that tongue, across that mouth and down that throat, his eyes locked on hers and he came. Jack came hard. Harder then he ever had before. Came so hard it kinda hurt a bit.

“Oh, wow,” Jacks vision was kinda blurry, “That was incredible.”

The pink pony slid up his torso, resuming her seat in his lap, both of them nose to nose.

She smiled. A smug and sure smile.

He was rock hard again. And he was inside of her. And apparently her muscles where such that she could provide suction.

Jack was a little concerned as to how this had happened. Until the mare brought herself down unto him with a firm impact of flesh and bone.

After that he was just holding onto her as she fucked him.

From a cold third person perspective it was clear he was screaming her name with religious devotion and weeping in joy.

Luckily for Jacks dignity he didn't notice that.

He just knew that this was the greatest moment of his life so far.

Jack came again. The mare kept pumping and he kept cumming. It was incredible, wonderful and kinda painful. No it wasn't kinda painful. It was a lot painful. It was a weird chilling pain that was reaching into his chest cavity from his groin.

He started to panic for a moment, before remembering that Pinkie was here. She would take him back to Ponyville if he blacked out. Sure as sunrise. And then they would have cupcakes and silly little parties and he'd fuck her every day.

“I love you...” Jack whispered as he yielded to unconsciousness.

“I know,” replied the changeling as it finally shrugged off it's disguise. It then hauled Jack's corpse a few dozen feet away before dropping it into the mass grave with the others.

* * *

There is a swirling gut wrenching sensation and for a moment everything tastes purple to you. The light is different. It's dark. Like the real dark you only get dozens of miles away from the city. The stone surface beneath your feet fell old, like bedrock. It looks like a circle, a raised platform, shaped by intent or nature out of the raw stone of the earth. Beyond that there is rustling, tall dark shapes swaying in the breeze. The air is humid and rich with the smell of things living wild. Above is a full moon sending her silver light through the canopy.

The “How to get to Equestria” pamphlet from your the local library sure is easy to use, isn't it? Wonder how it got there.