Bloom Filter

Chapters

Swish and Flick
Making Sense of Things
Coming Home
Morning Revelations
Assessing the Damage
Settling In
Unstable Equilibrium
Life a la Mode
Laundry List
Chasing the Apple
Apple Bloom Attends The Fall Formal
Friendship Fails
The Worst Possible Thing
Cracks Appear
Gang’s All Here
Big Reveal Feels
Scootaloo Has Wings
So Close to Answers
Twilight Sparkle
Meddling With the Natural Order
Feasts and Failure
Snowballing
Lost in the Woods
Ponylike Creatures
Scootaloo’s Dream
Dreamseekers
The Calm
Use More Tongue
Just Noi
Flight Lessons
The Game Has Changed
Unbelievable
Presentation is Everything
Making Arrangements
Twilight Trouble
On the Subject of Pony Youth
Announcements
Back to School
This is a disaster!
A horrible, horrible disaster!
The Limitations of Patience
Seeing the Forest for the Trees
Dreamkeepers
Too Little, Too Late
At World’s End
Pregnant Pause
Rainbow Dash
Mind Games
Gathering Data
Paying Attention
Disturbances
Highs and Lows
Intake
Revelations
Reconciliation
Girl Talk
The Golden Apple
Carbon Fire

Swish and Flick

Through dedicated effort on Apple Bloom’s part, they avoided any more angry confrontations. To be fair though she wasn’t the only one of them fighting to get along. They were all fighting to make peace with each other, each in their own way. Diamond Tiara didn’t have anyone she knew from her old school except them three and Silver, and she wasn’t a girl who was happy about being left alone. Apparantly she’d lost her dad at some point, and just hadn’t been quite the same since.

Apple Bloom didn’t think she should be able empathize, as she had lots of family left over, and she never had to deal with the loss of her own parents. It had happened before her time. But it was odd all four of them even Scootaloo just felt that understanding close to their hearts, of losing someone that you love. It must have just been something common to human nature in general, since there was no real connection between any of their losses, other than pure coincidence, but despite no huge calamity happening to all of them at once, they did share that as common ground, for what that’s worth.

Diamond seemed to be in a good mood around them, even though she and Scootaloo butted heads a lot. Really Scoots and Diamond thrived on that kind of conflict. Bloom wouldn’t have been surprised if Scootaloo hadn’t picked that ballet class, just so she could have something weird about herself to defend, instead of just being yet another unremarkable Rainbow Dash fan girl. Diamond and Scootaloo’s bickering was low key for the rest of the lunch today at least, and Sweetie seemed to really appreciate what Diamond Tiara had been studying about beauty and poise.

It was funny really: Sweetie Belle had the look of a Fashionist, but she was all left feet when it came to fabrics and was even shyer than Apple Bloom about performing or putting herself on the spot, so she couldn’t even think about theater or public speaking. It’d took an act of congress to get Sweetie to help with that video they put up on Poundtube, and that hadn’t even been an audience she could see!

Scootaloo had the look of a Jock, but her participation in professional sports was lackluster at best, and her interests changed so much on a daily basis that even having to take one whole half semester class was overwhelming her attention span. So even though the choice of major for Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo should have been obvious, neither of them could make them.

And Apple Bloom... well, she just wasn’t much good at anything. She couldn’t figure what group you’d stuff her in. Ecology maybe, because of her farm duds? Boy, but, those Eco-kids were crazy weird. She asked Sweetie Belle at one point, “Hey, if you were a Fashionist and Scootaloo was an Athlete, then what would ah be?”

Sweetie gave that a good amount of consideration, before saying, “Techie, probably.”

Apple Bloom tried to imagine herself in a labcoat and horn rimmed glasses and failed. “What, really?” she exclaimed in surprise.

Sweetie nodded, “You like machines and you’re really smart. But you’d have to give up what you do with your family to study, and you like exercising too much so you’d be unhappy I think. But just, superficially, I mean.”

“And...” Sweetie added too quietly for Diamond Tiara to hear, “You’d be too busy to be friends with us like Silver Spoon.”

Apple Bloom didn’t really know what to say to that. “T-thanks, Sweetie,” she said at her friend’s surprising perspicacity, going back to eating with those thoughts on her mind. What would she be doing if she wasn’t living on a cattle farm? Was that really what defined her life?

So of course when they finished eating, Apple Bloom’s pants almost fell off again. When she stood up with her tray she had to just sit down again in a hurry. “Uggh, what is wrong with mah belt today?” she said pulling on it fiercely to get it to stay securely on her boyish hips. She stood up again to find Diamond Tiara looking at her critically saying, “Your belt’s broken?”

“Yeah, ah think it’s stretched out or somethin’” Apple Bloom said uncomfortably, “Ah keep havin’ to tighten it just to keep my britches on.”

“It’s ‘cause you’re so tiny, miss boy hips,” Tiara said teasingly. Worse still Scootaloo actually snickered at that. She was trying to hide it, but man could Apple Bloom really blame her? Even Scootaloo had wider hips than Apple Bloom. It was embarassing!

“Ah’ll get a growth spurt soon,” Apple Bloom declared imperiously to Diamond Tiara, “Just you wait and ah’ll be lookin’ down on y’all!”

Later when they were putting their trays away, Diamond actually smiled at Apple Bloom, and said,

“Thanks for... that. You’re a really great person somewhere under that backwoods redneck look you’ve got there.”

“Gee, what a compliment,” Apple Bloom rolled her eyes, milling towards the hallway to get a head start when the bell went off. “Ah don’t make fun of your silly dresses, so what’s wrong with a pair of waders and a work shirt?”

“Well my style is already perfect, so of course you can’t complain,” she said snidely, only half jokingly too. Then she said something a bit uncharacteristic of the rough cut Diamond. “You do pull off the look well though,” she said, “Your shirt would clash horribly, but it contrasts well with your hair, and most kids can’t make the school spirit head boppers look good, but you make them work. They match your skin tone.”

“Wait, what?” Apple Bloom said impatiently as the bell rang, wanting to get onto her next class before she was tardy again. “I ain’t wearin no head boppers.”

“Sure you are,” Diamond Tiara said, leaning close to Apple Bloom and squinting. “Though I can’t see the... wait...”

The ceramics students dropped something in the other room making the distant sound of glass shattering as Diamond jerked back to arm’s length, her composure lost totally in an instant. She stuttered “I–I–I–um– I mean, no of course you aren’t I was just joking because you totally are just fine I’m just seeingnot seeing anything because everything is fine I gotta go, bye!”

And just like that, she was gone.

Apple Bloom massaged her temples. Something wrong with that Diamond girl, if she thought that was what you call a joke. Still Diamond Tiara had seemed genuinely distraught. Apple Bloom wondered if maybe she’d been too friendly to her, or maybe there really was something wrong with her outfit? She got elbowed aside by a hurried upperclassman though, and was already getting pulled into the hallway throng for the between period rush.

Sighing, she shouldered her book bag more firmly, and started shoving her own way through the crowd in different directions than her three friends, who she would never see again until all the way until next lunch period. And now she had to go to that stupid English class. With troubled thoughts, she went to her locker and hastily grabbed her afternoon textbooks, then jogged all the way over to English class, getting in right when the period bell rang.

Of course the teacher was standing there at the chalkboard, looking at Apple Bloom with a disgusted expression. Did she ever adopt a different expression? Certainly not when Apple Bloom was around to disappoint her.

“Sorry, Ms. Harshvoice,” Apple Bloom said almost out of habit by now, sulking her way to her desk. Apple Bloom had picked a desk in the front because she thought it was going to be a good class, but now it was her curse to sit up there and face the constant scrutiny of terror in a purple sportcoat. Normally the teacher didn’t spare her half a glance, rounding up the students who did arrive late and making them stand outside the class like they did something wrong. Today for some reason though, the others got a get-into-jail free card. Snips and Watermelonsomething whose only vice was chronic tardiness made their way to their seats completely unnoticed. Why?

Because Ms. Harshvoice kept on glaring right at Apple Bloom.

“Um... uhm... somethin’ the matter?” Apple Bloom asked nervously as the teacher’s unflinching gaze judged her so very absolute and totally.

“Aside from that atrocious sentence you just uttered?” the teacher said in her heavy round voice, “As a matter of fact, yes there is something that is the matter. That headgear is not appropriate for class. Please remove it so that I may begin without it distracting the other students.”

“What?!” Apple Bloom exclaimed, tugging at her hair protectively, “But mah bow you ain’t never complained about before at all!”

With every word she uttered, you could see Ms. Harshvoice dying a little more inside, and it just wasn’t fair to Apple Bloom. It ain’t fair to get mad at someone for how they talk. Nothing wrong with a manner of speaking! It weren’t her fault she talked like this!

“Your bow is fine,” Ms. Harshvoice enunciated clearly, as if to a young toddler. “While I support your commitment towards the school spirit, please remove your...” she pinched her forehead, biting out the words as if it pained her to do so, “school spirit head ...boppers.”

Apple Bloom began to protest more, then blinked, looking back at Ms. Harshvoice to try and find some hint of insincerity in the teacher’s burnt orange face. There was as much insincerity in that face as there was water in an Arizona desert.

“Ah ain’t wearin’ head boppers,” Apple Bloom repeated, to the second person today who said that.

“As much as I appreciate you finally using the contraction ‘ain’t’ in its proper place, you are wearing head boppers,” the teacher insisted. “Take them off right now, or I will have to send you to the office to have them removed for you.”

A sudden thought made Apple Bloom’s mouth drop open in shock. “Diamond Tiara!” she exclaimed angrily. reaching up above her forehead and rummaging around in her bountiful red bangs. “She musta slipped them on me while I wasn’t lookin’ ahm sorry teach!” Apple Bloom couldn’t find that blue headband though. There wasn’t anything on her head from front to back.

Apple Bloom lowered her hands and folded them on her desk, smiling nervously and saying, “Um... ah cain’t find the headband. May ah be excused to attend to it in the bathroom?”

“Oh for heaven’s sake,” Ms. Harshwhinney griped, striding the few paces forward to Apple Bloom’s desk and reaching for her head. With the intention of pulling the hairband out by its most prominent features, she grabbed an ear, and both she and Apple Bloom exclaimed at once,

“Eauuhh!”

The teacher flung her arm back as if burned staggering back a step while Apple Bloom put her hands over her head saying, “What did you do?!” to the teacher frantically.

Ms. Harshvoice had grabbed her ear. Her real ear! That wasn’t a headband! And as soon as Ms. Harshvoice’s fingers touched her ear, Apple Bloom felt it flick back and forth.

“What’s wrong with mah ears?!” she continued to exclaim. Apple Bloom couldn’t find them! There wasn’t anything on the side of her head! She kept feeling higher and higher and there were no ears and then– and then she found her ears.

“What’s going on?” came Snip’s voice behind her. Her ear turned to face the sound!

“That is so very entripping,” an unfamiliar girl’s voice came.

“Nurse!” Ms. Harshvoice said dragging Apple Bloom bodily out of her desk, “Get to the nurse!”

Apple Bloom’s ears weren’t her ears they were these giant furry things under her finger’s touch. She grabbed them to stop the flicking but that was even worse.

“Out!” Ms. Harshvoice said, shoving Apple Bloom out the door, “Get to the nurse! Go straight to the nurse before you–before something!” She turned around then and said, “Everyone please remain calm. Please stay in your seats. We are not going anywhere until she has” and then the door to Apple Bloom’s English class swung closed.

“...until she has returned or a school nurse has delivered a conclusion about our next action in the current situation!” the teacher’s voice continued muffled behind the door. Oh lordy Apple Bloom could hear everything. How had she not noticed this before? In the middle of a period, the halls were empty. That gave Apple Bloom the perfect opportunity to run like the fiery demons of Hell were hot on her heels and breathing down her neck.

Like most things in school, Apple Bloom knew where the nurse’s office was, despite not yet having been there before. She charged in the door with the red circle underneath a white plus sign on it, shouting, “MAH EARS ARE BROKE!”

The nurse behind the desk with her blue curls and far too much makeup on was leaning forward with her hands over her ears, shouting, “DO YOU FEEL ANY PAIN? CAN YA HEAR ME?” That made Apple Bloom’s ears immediately turn down and back and she shrank from the nurse in a fright saying,

“W-w-why are you shouting at me? Mah ears are fine!”

The nurse took her hands away from her ears asking in a more even tone in a very familiar accent, “Then why were you shouting?”

“Because mah ears are br–” Apple Bloom stopped. “Because mah–” Apple Bloom shook with frustration, blushing furiously, “Because I was upset!” she yelped, “Mah ears are... ah can hear just fine, but they’re on top of mah head!”

The nurse took a second look at her, then frowned saying, “Honey ya cain’t get out of class with a pair of fake ears.”

“They ain’t fake!” Apple Bloom said stamping her foot angrily.

“Ah wasn’t born yesterday, hun. Them those school spirit things,” the nurse concluded, sitting back in her chair. “Now get along to class. Ain’t nothing wrong with you.”

Apple Bloom responded by jumping onto the desk.

“Hey!” the nurse shouted in outrage, “What are you doing? You can’t get up here!”

“Can you see a headband in mah hair?” Apple Bloom demanded, sticking her face up to the nurse’s. “Go on, take it off!” she challenged, the tears in her eyes robbing her of any effective intimidation. “They ain’t fake, ah can feel them!”

“Calm down, child!” the nurse harried her, pushing her back off the desk along with several very important papers that will never be mentioned again. “Is this some sort of cry for help?” she asked confusedly, “Are you bein’ bullied? Do you need to see the school psychologist? Because she’s busy with another student right now.”

Meanwhile in the school psychologist’s office, the psychologist was beginning to conclude that after enough cases like these, she would not need to continue dying her hair to appear distinguished. Or, undying it, as such the case may be.

“It’s happening again!” the distraught first year student told her with shaking hands and poorly focused eyes, “The horse people! The mascot is real! But it never happened before! I think I’m going crazy you’ve got to help me! I thought I saw the ears, but I couldn’t have! Because it never happened! Except it did!”

“Please, Miss Tiara,” the gray haired woman said to her as gently as possible, “You’re among friends here. Nobody is judging you. Can you remember when you first started seeing things?”

“Last year,” she replied, then her eyes narrowed again and she exclaimed, “But it couldn’t have been last year! It was when we graduated. It was... it hasn’t happened yet! But it did! But it... it was... earlier today.”

“It sounds like you’ve been suffering from this for a long time,” the psych said in a sympathetic tone.

“I can’t remember...” the student said, looking down and pulling at her already disarrayed hair. She lifted her head up suddenly and said, “But at lunch today! I swear I saw it! My f... my friend had h-h-h–”

Meanwhile, back at the Nurse’s office.

“Why won’t you believe me?” Apple Bloom asked with an uncontrollable quaver in her voice. She wiped at her eyes, feeling her ears go back again without even any sort of shouting going on.

The nurse just looked at her quietly. Apple Bloom felt like she was on the spot. Was Apple Bloom crazy? Were these just head boppers and she was just imagining them? Why did her English teacher react like that though? Did Apple Bloom imagine that too?

“How are you doing that?” the nurse asked her curiously. Apple Bloom gave her a puzzled look.

“Doing what?” she asked, suspicious of the sudden change in topic.

“Are they on a pull string or something?” the nurse said squinting at the top of Apple Bloom’s head. “How are they folding back like that?”

Apple Bloom felt her ears unflatten. For once, the sensation gave her a flutter of hope instead of creeping dread. “They’re not fake,” she said as calmly as she could. “They’re mah real ears. Ah don’t know why they keep moving. That’s why I came here. Something is wrong with my ears.”

“Please,” Apple Bloom continued earnestly, “There’s a whole class waitin’ on me. You gotta find out what this is or they’ll be stuck in there forever!”

“Alright, alright,” the nurse conceded, walking around the desk saying, “C’mere, let me take a look at ya.” Apple Bloom did so, and the nurse crouched down to look closely at the top of her head. Where somehow her ears had gone and mutated or something. Was she some kind of elf or something? Secretly swapped as an infant with her identical twin, to take her place until the fey glamour faded and she was exposed for the changeling monster that she was?

Apple Bloom’s ear twitched again when she felt the nurse’s finger touch it. The nurse lurched back then, falling down on her ass and looking at Apple Bloom, exclaiming, “Holy shit they’re real!” with pure wide eyed astonishment.

“Ah told ya!” Apple Bloom said, “Why are mah ears like this? They were fine this morning!”

“J-j-j-ust, uh,” the nurse climbed to her feet, holding a hand out to Apple Bloom and saying, “F-follow me.”

The nurse’s office had one tiny little examination room with mirror above a sink and swabs and cabinets full of mysterious stuff and human anatomy posters on the wall, as well as a “Don’t forget your flu shot!” poster. “Just wait here,” the nurse said giving Apple Bloom a scared yet apologetic look. “The doctor will uh, see you shortly.”

“There’s a doctor at this school?” Apple Bloom asked before she could run off.

The nurse shook her head, “No there ain’t but, there is one at the clinic!” She smiled awkwardly and said, “It’ll be f—it might take a while. Ah’m sorry.”

Apple Bloom sat down in the little chair they had by the examination table. “Just... just leave me alone,” she said miserably, “I don’t know if this is gonna get any worse though, so please hurry.”

Nodding curtly, the nurse shut the door, and you could hear her footsteps as she ran into the front room. You could hear her fumbling with the telephone, and it was pretty easy to pick out exactly which number she dialed from the dual tones emitting from the speaker. And you could also hear her flustered and barely coherent conversation with the receptionist on the other end, who you could also hear.

Apple Bloom was tired of these ears already.

The nurse left for some reason, she didn’t say, and the resulting silence was enough that Apple Bloom could even hear murmurs of the other classes in progress. Thank goodness her super ears couldn’t pick up enough to discern actual words or she’d start going nuts. As if this situation wasn’t nuts enough already.

She shifted uncomfortably in the lumpy chair, then stood up and paced around the examination room restlessly. She looked at the posters and then the sink, and then a light bulb hit her. A mirror! Apple Bloom shot to the sink, sticking her head forward and looking urgently into the mirror there. What she saw in her reflection was the worried visage of a young girl with custard yellow skin and bright red hair that clustered into bouncy round bangs. And nestled in that hair like they always belonged there were a pair of big prominent conical ears, like big old radar dishes sticking out of her head at a slight angle. It made the lack of ears on the sides of her face look less empty somehow.

But they were undeniably, irrefutably, her ears.

She gently pinched one in between her left thumb and index finger. The ears matched her skin color, but the color in them wasn’t skin. It was a dense short fur, softer than she’d expected. It felt weird pinching her earlobe like this, and she had to struggle to resist the urge to flick it, so she let it go again. Apple Bloom cupped her hands in back of them, feeling how their soft furry texture emerged straight from the top of her head. Curiously she poked a finger inside one, and well... it would have been impossible to hear, if her ear canal wasn’t intact, but the thought that she had holes in her head up there made her wince and pull her finger back.

Apple Bloom looked at them, how they framed her head. They made her face look oddly flat from the side and at an angle, even though a human’s face was supposed to be flat. But looking dead on into the mirror, you wouldn’t have been able to tell if she had a muzzle or not. That angle, it kind of made her look like a...

The last thing Apple Bloom saw of her reflection were her eyes widening with horror, before she tore herself away from the mirror and just went back to pacing around the room. She sat down then and stood up, and sat down again, wiggling until she felt comfortable, staring at the door. She wished she’d brought her book bag. Instead she had to spend the time ruminating—thinking not ruminating, on what might have possibly caused this.

It had to be that strange dream, it had to be. It must have been some alien... thingamagig that really happened, and Apple Bloom and her friends only thought it was a dream. That golden apple thing had to be real, and it had somehow done that, then undone it, then made her think she was sleeping the whole time, then started doing it again.

That made absolutely no sense.

What about her friends? They were right there when that golden bomb went off. But they didn’t transform at all in the dream. It was just Apple Bloom. Stupid little Apple Bloom going and grabbing things she had no idea how safe they were, and no right to be toying with. It was probably just her and not them, but she’d have to tell someone about them too when she could. All she could do now is wait.

The chair was uncomfortable again. Something in it kept poking her in the butt. Then when she shifted so it was over the lip of the seat it kept catching on that lip. Apple Bloom pushed just a bit off the chair, trying to see behind her to find what it was that was catching. It was something above her belt. It felt weird it was...

Oh no.

Doctor Stable was not one to make house calls, but Nurse Snowheart from the high school had never out and run physically into his office and demand that he come with her to aid a student in distress. She seemed reluctant to tell him what was wrong, which couldn’t be a good sign. Still, the way she kept framing it like “Her ears got all big and weird” made some part of him suspect that this was just some kind of sick joke at his expense.

So, cancelling his appointments for the afternoon, some very important ones for that matter like a student who needed their stitches removed, and another student who had broken their arm in football and needed to hear his prognosis on their x-rays (it was a good prognosis), he grabbed his hastily assembled medical bag and hurried out to where the nurse was waiting next to her old beat up convertible. He made sure to inform her of just what she was causing should this not be a very serious affair, and that she should call the emergency room should there be an actual life threatening emergency. As they drove he ran the gamut interrogating her about the real need for this unconventional visit. Had she damaged her ears? Gone deaf without explanation? Heavy fever and vomiting? Dizziness? Lack of coordination?

Finally the nurse just turned to face him at a stoplight and said that she simply could not explain it and that he would have to see for himself. Stable was starting to feel very uncomfortable about this situation. It didn’t appear to be a student in any sort of distress, while still appearing to be a student in distress. His apprehension warred with his curiosity, until finally his collosal sense of practicality stepped in and told them both that he was already in the automobile and it would take longer to return to the hospital than it would to check this out, just to see what was spooking Nurse Snowheart.

Though the nurse seemed terrified by the situation, the doctor couldn’t help but feel elated by it. Some sort of unexplained medical phenomenon, and it didn’t have symptoms of debilitation or pain. And something he could discover! It was with a childlike excitement carefully hidden inside him that he strode through that school’s nurse’s office to crack open the door to the examination room. “May I come in?” he asked congenially.

It was a girl’s voice who answered by asking, “Are you the doc?!” in a very well, distressed tone of voice.

“I’m Doctor Stable,” he announced, opening the door and stepping into the examination room where the red and yellow girl was sitting there uncertainly in the open backed chair. “Nurse Snowheart asked me here to help you. Thank you for waiting. Now, what seems to be the problem?”

She stood up then, and ran over, grabbing him by his shirt and saying, “You gotta help me doc!” She pleaded with her ears flat against her head, “Ah think I’m turnin into a cow!”

As Apple Bloom watched, the doctor at first stared at her blankly. Then his expression broke as a snort of laughter started to well up inside him. So she nipped it in the bud by grabbing his hand, and shoving her head against it. The nurse Snowheart was standing behind him, looking down at her fearfully.

“These. Are. Real!” Apple Bloom exclaimed, trying to make them move, though the one was too squished to flick around.

“Please, girl. Let me–” the doc pulled his hand out of her grasp roughly, saying, “Let me look!” So she crossed her arms and stood in front of him, as the undeniable truth on top of her head was a better argument than any she could make.

“Did you...” he said disbelievingly, “Is this some kind of surgery? How did you–”

“Surgery?!” Apple Bloom exclaimed tilting her head to look up at him. “How could it possibly be surgery?”

“How could it possibly be anything else?!” he exclaimed, making her wince and her ears turn down at his outburst. That made him even more shocked. Apple Bloom backed up with trepidation. She was gonna have to show him... that too.

“It’s because ah ate too much cow meat and now I’m turnin into one!” she said frustratedly, “Maybe it’s divine punishment! Ah don’t know!” Steeling her resolve, Apple Bloom spun around and stuck her butt out at him, pulling her shirt up.

“Young lady!” he shouted in alarm, “What are you– you have a tail.”

“Ah have a tail,” she agreed miserably.

“You have a tail,” he repeated numbly.

Her tail, in fact, was pushing her jeans down embarassingly (literally) and dangling over the edge of her belt. She couldn’t even see it, but she knew from feeling earlier that it was this spindley little thing, very responsive to her fingers, and somewhat ticklish. Just like you’d see coming out behind a cow. She didn’t just stand there with her ass in the air, but turned around and stood up straight, looking at him uncertainly.

“How... long have you had this?” he asked her, adjusting his spectacles and leaning against the sink.

“Today,” she replied.

“Today?!” he shot back.

“Ah had this strange dream in which me and mah friends found an apple, and it turned me into a– like a baby cow or something. But I wasn’t when ah woke up, nor the entire next day. But today I got these in English class!” she pointed at her ears, “And this started growin while I was waiting for you!” she pointed behind her as best as she could. She found herself wanting to wave her tail demonstrably, but she didn’t even know how to move it.

“You can’t just grow a tail in an hour,” he asserted frustratedly. “This makes no sense! This has to be some kind of joke! If you have any shred of decency in you as a human being,” he held up a hand before she could protest, “Not a cow, then you’ll tell me how you managed to pull this prank off, and what is really going on here.”

She just shrugged helplessly, “Ah keep sayin’ it ain’t no joke. Ah don’t know what’s goin’ on. You’re the doctor!”

Doc Stable straightened up and stared at her thoughtfully. He turned and looked back at the nurse. “Have you contacted her family yet?” he said in a neutral voice.

“I went straight for you,” she replied. “Nobody besides us knows about this.”

“And mah English class,” Apple Bloom pointed out helpfully. “And also mah friends, because I started gettin’ ears during lunch. I suppose anyone in the cafeteria coulda seen it.”

“That’s not why I was asking,” Doc Stable told the nurse irritatedly. “I need you to contact her family and ask them if they know anything about this.”

“What would mah folks know that you don’t?” Apple Bloom asked curiously, “They ain’t doctors. We’re cattle ranchers!”

“She has a point,” Nurse Snowheart said with a sickly smile, “Still we should get them over right away so they can... so they can be with her.”

“Firstly this has no basis in medical science or reality” the doctor asserted to both of them, “So I don’t know why you would think that being a doctor would give me some special knowledge about this. What I can do is ask questions, and be very careful about the answers that I collect. Her family is the most likely source I can think of for whatever might be causing... this.”

He then took a double take at Apple Bloom saying, “Wait, did you say they were cattle ranchers?”

“Ah’m Apple Bloom,” she introduced herself. “You know, Apple? As in the only cattle wranglers in town?”

“Alright, please just, wait there and we’ll help you as soon as we can. We need to get your family here so they can help,” the doctor said in a nervous half panicked voice. Apple Bloom frowned, but nodded. She waited in the examination room in that chair her new tail could fit through. It was already several inches long, and little red hairs were sprouting all along it, what she could see of it. It kept swishing back and forth now whether she tried to or not, every time she shifted in her seat.

Apple Bloom listened to the doctor call her grandmother in the other room, got Granny on the cell phone it sounded like. He kept things brief and ambiguous, and told Granny how Apple Bloom was in the nurse’s office and she needed her family to come and see her right away and talk with him about some things.

Granny’s “What?!” was probably loud enough for anyone to hear, not some half cow freak.

Once she hung up on the doctor, which gave them about 5 minutes before a Granny shaped torpedo would make its way across the school to the nurse’s office, he went and dialed another number. Just three letters. Wait, did that mean...

“Hello? Canterlot police?” he said quietly, as if he didn’t want to be heard, “I need you to come to the high school right away. There’s been a case of possible abuse and foul play. No. No I mean I may have evidence of a serial murderer in our town.”

Apple Bloom jumped up too hastily this time, the chair clattering as her very real tail caught on it. She ran to the door yanking it open. Running over to the office room which was also closed she pulled that door open, ran up to the doctor and grabbed his arm as if she could pull him away from the phone she shouted, “Serial murder?!”

“Oh, you heard that did you,” he said biting his lip.

“Every freaking word!” she snapped.

He looked at the open door to the office with consternation, but instead of making a break for it he knelt down, looking at her urgently and said, “Listen, if you are not the first girl they have turned into a—”

Granny burst through the door gasping for breath. “Hold on Apple Bloom!” she shouted, “I’m a comin’!” Then she started to rush over to Apple Bloom, giving the doctor just enough time to drop the phone and move aside, before sweeping her up into a crushing hug. “What they done to ya?!” she exclaimed, “You hurt? You sick? No explosions?”

“Ah’m...fine...Gran...ny...” Granny let go and looked Apple Bloom in the eye with her eyes sagging with concern. Apple Bloom took in a deep breath, then explained, “Ah was havin a dream about lookin’ for a golden apple with mah friends but when we found it it changed me into a cow or somethin and ah woke up two days ago and ah was fine, because it was just a dream and nothin really happened and now at lunch today ah started growing cow ears and now ah got a tail and the dream was real and I’m turnin’ into a cow!”

Granny shot the doctor a suspicious look saying, “What have you got her doped up on, morphine?”

“M– morphine?! Look at her ears!”

“What’s wrong with her ears?!” Granny said irately, gesturing at Apple Bloom, “They look just fine to Sam Hill Betsy Murgatroy child what happened to your ears?!”

“Ah told you Granny, ah’m turnin’ into a cow! Look at them! They’re all coney and furry!”

“Ah wasn’t talkin’ about your silly head boppers Apple Bloom,” the portly lady said squinting at her. “Yer real ears are solid gone! Did ye makeup them over or somethin?”

“Head bo– mah ears are up here Granny. These are mah real ears!” Apple Bloom was getting really frustated at having to prove this to everyone. Did her fur—her skin color really make her ears—those weird cow ears look like the school spirit headband?

“I don’t believe it,” Granny said stubbornly, crossing her arms with difficulty. She’d been trying to lose weight she really had, but with that physique and a diet of meat and butter it wasn’t really feasible for her to be skinny even in her old age.

“Just–” Apple Bloom flattened her ears again, not really keen on people touching them. “Just touch them,” she said anyway, “You’ll see that they’re as real as ah am.”

Granny was one of the few people Apple Bloom could really see eye to eye with. Granny must have gotten smaller in her old age, and plus she was wearing those old fashioned boots that barely had any platform to them. She could still pretty easily reach Apple Bloom’s ears though, and grabbed one of them pulling it like she was going to take it off.

“Ow, Granny!” Apple Bloom pushed her shouting, “Leggo, that hurts!”

Granny let Apple Bloom go and backed up, and, in fact she backed up so much that she ended up falling back into the chair against the wall.

“What on earth is goin’ on?” she said, all warbly.

“I was hoping you could tell us that,” Doc Stable said to Granny. “You manage a cattle ranch, if I recall. Has this ever happened before in your experience?”

“Cattle?” Granny said dumbly, looking all sorts of out of sorts, “I ain’t never seen nothing like this in all mah years! People don’t just change into cows. Least of which is my little granddaughter!”

“Any information you could have at all would help,” Doc Stable pleaded with her, “Has her behavior been strange? Something in her diet? Has anything happened recently?” Apple Bloom opened her mouth to shout about the golden apple again when her ear turned again at the sound of hard footsteps pounding up the hall from the distance but coming closer. It wasn’t break period yet.

“You don’t change into a cow by eatin’ cows neither!” Granny protested. Both turned at a shuffling noise from outside, as the police entered the nurse’s office. Well, entered might have been a bit of an understatement.

About three officers broke in slamming the door open shouting, “Police! Nobody move!” brandishing their firearms like they actually knew how to use them. Unsurprisingly, nobody moved. After a few seconds, they lowered their weapons. The officer in the middle, a tall swarthy man white as the driven snow, said, “Ma’am we received an emergency call to this number, a very serious emergency call,” to the vanilla-pudding colored receptionist, who still had her hands piked up in the air as high as they would go.

“Officers,” Doctor Stable interjected, moving slowly to the doorway, which blocked Apple Bloom’s view of the main reception room. “When I said may have evidence I did not imply there was any imminent danger.”

There was a pause, before one of the officers, the lead one apparantly, said “Stand down, officers,” and the three all holstered their weapons. “I’m sorry doctor,” the lead officer said in a cool yet earnest voice, “It was reported that when your call cut off there was a child screaming. We could only assume the worst.”

Apple Bloom turned beet red. She moaned and hid her face in her hands. What was she even thinking? She’d gone and interrupted a police call.

“I’m terribly sorry for that,” the doctor replied honestly if guardedly, saying, “The scream was nothing other than her protesting me calling you, because she had not considered the full implications of this supernatural phenomenon. I am confident it is very important for you to be involved, and I am grateful you arrived as quickly as you did.”

“Supernatural phenomenon?” the lead officer asked in a half joking tone.

The doctor shook his head slowly, saying “Perhaps it’s best if you see for yourself.”

The examination room was quite crowded with Apple Bloom, three officers and the doctor all crowding in there. She was squirming in her seat, trying to adjust for this new tail which kept on slowly growing longer and the hairs on it longer and thicker. Granny was still sitting out in the waiting room with the receptionist who was looking stressed enough that she’d had to be reminded to put her arms down.

“This is beyond medical science,” the doctor explained. “The girl here is growing a– a tail at an accelerated rate beyond which should be possible. Her ears cannot be surgically attached as they are fully motile and integrated with her skull. I would like to get her to my office immediately to perform x-rays, but first I needed to ensure that it wouldn’t end in a terrible injustice.”

“You see,” Stable said pacing regally, despite only having a few feet to do so, “If some heretofore unexplainable phenomenon is transforming this girl into cattle, her family, or ostensible family, are cattle ranchers. If I hadn’t called you I could be well on my way to becoming a cow myself! They may have been changing people into cows for years with no one the wiser, and I’m sure you know what they do to cows on a cattle ranch besides milk them? Thus the urgency of a police call!”

Apple Bloom was growing more and more incensed as the doctor spoke, both incensed and terrified as his words made entirely too much sense. “Yer– you cain’t think mah granny did this! She cain’t! She’d never do that to anyone! You’re wrong! Y-you don’t even know the Apples! Mah family is everything t-that is kind and good!”

“You’re absolutely right,” the doctor said staring down the little girl. “Your family has not done this to you, nor can they do it to others, and I’m proving that because if my hypothesis was correct then with the police involved there is no way such a thing could continue in secret.”

“He’s exonerating them,” the lead officer said distantly, still staring at Apple Bloom in shock, “That means he called us here to prove that they’re innocent.”

“Oh! Uh,” Apple Bloom blushed again and put her hands back in her lap, “Well, that’s right okay then.”

In the silence that followed there was the sound of a cell phone in the other room. One of the rear officers whirled, uttering “Hey! Who are you calling?!” in a ...very similar voice to the lead officer.

“Mah granddaughter,” Granny Smith’s voice came in full on defiance, “An’ I already called mah grandson so don’t make a fuss about it.”

“Please don’t get any other people involved in this ma’am,” the third officer said in a chastising tone. She walked over to Granny saying, “I’m going to have to confiscate that cell phone.”

“Well here you go,” Granny said adding angrily, “Because I ain’t got no more family to call!”

They only had to wait a minute or so, since both Big Macintosh and Applejack attended the high school. The police had moved out to the waiting room, the school nurse retreating to hide in the side office while the doctor remained to examine Apple Bloom as best as he could with limited facilities. The first thing he did was measure her tail, at 6 inches now, so he could get an exact measurement later. The ratty, fleshy part of it was entirely covered from butt to tip in bright red hair now. Before he could test more, the others arrived.

When her brother and sister arrived, Applejack saying, “Granny? What’s this about? Why are there cops here? Is Apple Bloom in trouble?” and Big Mac saying well, not much at all, Doctor Stable walked out to the waiting room to address them and Apple Bloom crept to the door of the examination room, too afraid to show herself to them, just peering out into the waiting room fearfully.

“Apple Bloom’s siblings, I presume?” the doctor said to the strapping young man in a red plaid shirt darker than his pale red skin with a good sturdy pair of jeans like Apple Bloom’s but longer and looser going all the way over his boots. Apple Bloom had her own jeans cinched way up trying to keep this tail in line without losing them entirely, and her shirt was hanging loosely over her shoulders.

Applejack would have worn jeans but well, school dress code for upper division students was a lot stricter, so she had a plain skirt fashioned from... an old pair of jeans, a plain white shirt rolled up above the elbows and a green scarf matching her eyes, not to mention her ubiquitous hat made of the same sturdy cow leather as her apple decorated boots.

“Eyup,” Mac said.

The doctor looked at him expectantly, then adjusted his eyeglasses and continued, “I will make this brief ma’am, because I would like to get Apple Bloom to my office to perform a full examination. Your sister appears to be magically transforming into a cow.”

“Heh heh heh,” Applejack chuckled casually.

The doctor didn’t smile.

“Yer jokin’ right?” she asked him, with a raised eyebrow.

“Only insofar as all of existence appears to be a joke,” he offered snidely. At her uncomprehending look he added, “No. I’m not joking.”

“Apple Bloom!” Granny hollered, “Git over here so we can see you!”

Apple Bloom gulped, and walked around the edge of the door, coming into the waiting room and approaching her sister with trepidation. She felt so insignificant and small with all eyes on her, as if the increasingly shocked gaze of her brother and sister would drive her right into the ground.

“...what?” Big Macintosh asked.

“Ah’m sorry,” Apple Bloom said sadly, “Ah just don’t know.”

“Apple Bloom, your ears!” Applejack said in alarm, “I–is that a tail??”

“Ah don’t kn—” Apple Bloom couldn’t say she didn’t know; it was so obvious. It just... moved. She couldn’t help but curl it around her side fearfully, as ineffectual and inexplicable as that was. How could she even move it at all? The creepy chills she was getting, from strange muscles moving in her entirely-too-long spine, just made it tighten against her.

“...Yeah,” admitted Apple Bloom, just feeling absolutely forlorn.

“How did this happen?” Applejack gasped, going on her knee to look at her sister.

“Ah had a dream,” Apple Bloom explained worriedly, “Ah thought it was a dream ah mean. About a golden apple! And ah turned into... this, but all the way. I thought it was a dream, but then today I started turning into a cow, for real!”

At Apple Bloom’s earnest entreaty, Applejack’s look of horror flashed with surprise, then immediately fell to a deadpan. She squinted at Apple Bloom, leaned over to look behind her, looked at Apple Bloom’s ears, looked her in the face and said

“Apple Bloom, you ain’t changing into a cow.”

“You don’t believe me?” Apple Bloom exclaimed, backing up a step from her sister. “You?? Buh. But, ah got this!” she grabbed her own tail, “And these!” she pointed up at her head, with her other hand. “How can you not believe me?” she said in utter exasperation. “You think they’re fake too?? Ah swear they’re real! Go on and touch—”

“Apple Bloom!” Applejack shouted at her admonishingly, making Apple Bloom clam right up. Applejack sighed, and rubbed her forehead, then said to Apple Bloom, “Now ah didn’t mean it that way. But ain’t you ever looked at a cow’s ear before?”

Apple Bloom just looked at her blankly. “What about a cow’s ear?”

“Cow ears have a corner to ‘em, like big kites,” Applejack explained, “They ain’t all concial and round like that. And you call that a cow tail? It’s got hair all over it!”

“S-so?” Apple Bloom mumbled in utter confusion.

“Cows only have long hair on the tip of their tails,” Applejack said, with a note of irony in her voice. “Ah bet next you’re gonna tell me you got four nipples?”

“Applejack!” Apple Bloom protested blushing embarassedly. “Ah don’t—I never even— then, what am I turning into?”

Applejack shook her head, saying, “Ah’m sorry sis, I just don’t know. It ain’t a cow though. Some kinda cat, maybe?”

Apple Bloom shook her head, “No I didn’t have paws ah mean– in the dream. Ah thought they were cow hooves, but... but you’re right!” Apple Bloom just clenched her fists and stomped a foot, shouting at no one in particular, “You’re right because none of this is making any sense!”

Big Macintosh spoke up thoughtfully, “Wouldn’t a cat mean she had six—” but Applejack waved a hand frantically to shush him before he finished his sentence.

“If I might interject,” the doctor said, “I’m Doctor Stable, and I’m overseeing your sister’s... condition. I need to know if either of you have ever seen anything like this before. If it’s a family secret, there’s no reason to keep it, as it’s certainly secret no more. I can swear confidentiality outside of this room, but Apple Bloom’s English class can’t be expected to do the same.”

“Nope,” Big Mac said confidently, crossing his arms, and frowning with confused frustration looking at Apple Bloom.

“It sure would be a doozy of a family secret, if it was!” Applejack declared, staring at Apple Bloom hand to hip, “But it ain’t. Ah ain’t never in mah life...”

She trailed off to silence then, and frowned. “Ah haven’t seen uh...” she tried again, not finishing her sentence, a distant look in her eyes.

Applejack shook her head, “Ah cain’t say ah ain’t never seen anything like this before, but I sure don’t recall doing so. It uh... it sounds familiar?” she shrugged.

“You couldn’t have forgotten something like this!” the doctor said aghast.

“Yes ah did!” Applejack shot back, pausing again and saying, “Ah mean, ah don’t remember, so ah must have forgot. If it happened before, that is.”

“Any information at all would be most helpful, Miss Apple,” the lead officer said with a notepad in hand. “Has anyone told you to forget about it, or threatened you or your family?”

“What?! No!” Applejack snapped at him, “Nopo–no body ever threatened mah... I mean, ah don’t... ah don’t remember if anybody ever did.” She put her fingers to her temples, saying, “This is so weird.”

“If you’d like to answer from the safety of the station, we can–”

“It ain’t a safety thing, ah just don’t remember!” Applejack fumed, “Whatever danger there was we’re all safe now we’re–” she got that distant look again, and this time it was a look of relief, like an old pain lifted from her eyes, eyes that shone with the sadness of unimaginable loss.

“We’re all safe now,” she repeated softly, like she couldn’t even believe it.

“I can’t promise a full examination would reveal anything more,” the doctor said behind Apple Bloom, “But can we please take this to my office? I would like to learn as much about this as possible, and I fear we’re running out of time!”

“Out of time??” Apple Bloom asked spinning to look up at him fearfully. “What do you mean?”

His eyes softened as he said to her, “My dear girl, haven’t you noticed you’ve been getting smaller?”

Apple Bloom’s heart stopped right in her throat. She looked at Granny standing there looking at her comfortingly. She looked up at Granny standing there looking at her comfortingly. “Oh for Pete’s sake!” she cried her eyes burning with tears of frustration.

“We’re comin’ with,” Applejack said tensely to the doctor while Apple Bloom stomped out her frustrations.

“Applejack?” Apple Bloom asked her warily, “But what about your schooling?”

“School can wait, Apple Bloom,” Applejack said to her, “You need your family with you, right now.”

Apple Bloom looked at her fitfully, then just whimpered and hugged her tight around the waist, because that’s as high as Apple Bloom could reach now.

“My card,” the doctor said handing it to Granny. “Officers?” he asked casually behind him.

“I think we have enough for a s-statement,” the lead officer said uncertainly. “The crisis has passed, and nothing unlawful seems to be happening here. We’ll start an investigation, but you can probably imagine that we won’t uncover much about something like this. Please don’t hesitate to call us if you are ever in danger though.”

He paused before leading his small entourage out of the office, saying, “We’re also going to have to pay you a visit later, just to make sure nothing else went wrong, so be ready for that.”

“You need our address?” Granny piped up.

He laughed at that. “You’re the Apples! Know any other cattle ranches around here? Oh, but that reminds me.” He turned to one of his inferior officers and said, “Officer Heartstrings, her cell phone.”

The blue and pink haired officer got a guilty look and fumbled it out, handing it to Granny with a whispered apology. The police made tracks then, and Doctor Stable was determined that the rest of them would too. The doctor hurried them all out, and as fast as she could Apple Bloom was headed towards his office.

Author's Note

Why Equestria Girls? Why the first movie? Why brain, whyyyyy? :raritydespair:

Making Sense of Things

Apple Bloom rode together in between Granny and Applejack in their big green pickup, with Big Mac lounging in the back, while following the nurse’s car where Doctor Stable rode as a passenger, the peculiar little entourage heading across town to the doctor’s office and clinic.

Granny and Big Mac were silent but Applejack was talking the whole way. “How you doin’ Apple Bloom?” she asked the girl who sat sandwiched in between her and Granny. Applejack was at the wheel but she certainly didn’t have trouble talking out the side of her face while doing so. Granny seemed content to lean heavily on the window, staring out into the distance.

Apple Bloom didn’t really want to think about it much less talk, so she said a little resentfully after a long pause, “...mah tail hurts.” It didn’t exactly hurt persay; she was more hurt that it existed at all and she couldn’t put it out of her mind. It wasn’t comfortable to kink it up against her back, and it grinded into the edge of her belt if she tried to put it between her legs, so she just had it kind of curling sideways along the edge of her pants, just barely sticking out behind her on the right. Pressed up against the plush car seat, it was starting to feel like it was going numb. Which honestly wouldn’t bother her one bit, because she wasn’t supposed to feel anything down there, but she couldn’t imagine it was the healthiest way to sit.

“Must be plum weird havin’ a tail,” Applejack mused in her regard.

“The ears are weirder, t’be honest,” Apple Bloom admitted. “They keep moving when ah hear stuff.”

“Can you hear better now?” Applejack suggested.

“You wouldn’t believe it!” Apple Bloom exclaimed giving her sis a wild eyed look. “Ah’m just glad the cab is insulated, or ah’d be holdin’ the things against my head from the noise!” She demonstrated by grabbing them in her hands and actually holding them against her head.

After another pause, Applejack asked quietly, “How you holdin’ up?”

Apple Bloom sighed and slumped, saying “Ah’m scared sis. This ain’t supposed to happen... what’s gonna happen to me?”

“We’ll always be there for you Apple Bloom,” Applejack said, “Ah just want you to know that. You could change into a potted plant and I’d still water you every day, and ah wouldn’t rest until I found out how to save you.”

Apple Bloom frowned at the implications of that, but she said, “Thanks sis... I guess.”

“We’ll figure this out Apple Bloom,” Applejack said comfortingly, “Bad things just don’t happen without some way to make them right again. If we figure what’s causin’ it then there’ll surely be a way to– to... y’ said you knew somethin’ about what was causin’ it?”

“It’s the golden apple,” Apple Bloom said. “Ah know it sounds stupid, but it’s the only idear ah got. Ah was out in the woods past the farm house, and ah thought it was a dream but... well, then this happened.”

“What was the dream about?” Applejack asked curiously. “Any little bit could help.”

“Ah was lookin’ for the golden apple,” Apple Bloom explained, “Ah don’t know how I knew about it an’ all. It was just obvious, from the dream. Y’know how that is?”

“Heh, yeah, dreams have their own weird set of rules to them,” Applejack admitted.

“So me and Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle we were out in the woods lookin’ for the apple, and Scootaloo was kinda scared, and Sweetie was all scratched up because she’s about as woodsy as a powder puff, but we kept goin’ because it was real important.”

“Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle, those are your friends from school, right?” Applejack asked. The truck made an easy left turn, going down a second major street.

“Yeah they’re mah best friends!” Apple Bloom exclaimed. “And they were helpin’ me look. So ah found a silver meadow, ah mean, it looked silver ‘cause of the moonlight, but—”

“Yeah ah ‘m with ya there,” Applejack confirmed.

“It was all round, kinda like we were standin’ on the moon. Ah... don’t know how to describe it. But there was just one little apple sapling there, and it had this one big huge fruit on it an’ nothin’ else.”

“The golden apple?” Applejack guessed.

“Yeah it was!” Apple Bloom responded. “It was all gold and, and like it was metal, but it was like it was bright as day. It was night everywhere except the apple. It was like a piece of sunshine...”

“So you found the apple,” Applejack prompted, “And then...”

“Then ah picked it,” Apple Bloom said mournfully, “Ah didn’t know it would—ah mean ah thought it was like a wish, or somethin’, but it was just an apple. And before we could put it away, it exploded!”

“Like, a bomb?”

“No like, like a camera flash. It just all turned into light. When ah could see again Sweetie and Scootaloo were all big and stuff, or so ah thought. But they looked at me like I was some kinda monster, and when ah looked at mahself ah didn’t have hands anymore! A-and this big old tail between mah legs.”

“Them too?”

“No, just me... ah was the only one touchin’ the apple when it went off.”

“Then what happened?”

Apple Bloom pursed her lips, and said, “Then ah just woke up.”

“So it was a dream?” Applejack pressed.

“Ah woke up in bed but... if it was a dream, then why am I changing into it?”

Applejack just shook her head slowly.

“Ah’m sorry Applejack,” Apple Bloom said hopelessly to her big sis, “Ah wish ah knew more, but that’s the only thing. The rest of mah day was normal, and it was only the next day that it just started happening out of the blue.”

Applejack kept on silently for a while, then said, “You’re more help than you know it, sis. You said you dreamed about your friends, so now we know to call up mah friend Rarity, and whoever Scootaloo’s parents are too.”

“But why would—” Apple Bloom froze, “You don’t think they’re changing too, do you?!”

Applejack hesitated, but said, “It’s just something to think about. They’re probably fine, but if they ain’t then ah could call them and stop a lot of panic, pain and hardship.”

She smiled, glancing at Apple Bloom and said, “And it’d be all thanks to you that they were safe.”

“It’d be all thanks to me that they were cows,” Apple Bloom countered gloomily.

“You ain’t changing into a cow!” Applejack said firmly.

“Well, whatever ah am,” she snapped back grouchily, “Some kind of weird cat with no paws. It’s just weird... too weird.”

“Did you ask them about the dream?” Applejack said switching topics.

Apple Bloom lit up in rememberance. “Oh, yeah! That’s why it cain’t be a dream, because they both said they had the same dream. And that cain’t happen for real.”

“Neither can changin’ into a cow,” Applejack observed.

Apple Bloom’s ears flattened out disgustedly. “Yeah, yeah ah get it. So maybe it was a uh, magic dream or somethin’. So what?”

“So,” Applejack said, “They saw you in the dream. That means they got a— oh look we’re here.”

The pickup pulled into the parking lot behind the nurse’s beat up old convertible, and everyone piled out. Apple Bloom had to cinch her belt tighter again. She was noticeably several inches shorter than she used to be. It was crazy she was almost eye level with the door knobs. Apple Bloom hadn’t been this short since her... uh, last birthday. OK so she was kind of young, big deal! Getting shorter by any degree is medifically impossible. Not to mention that her height didn’t account for the added height of her increasingly loose boot pumps.

“They saw you in the dream, huh? That means they got a good look at you, Apple Bloom,” Applejack said while the doctor was hurrying them past the receptionist straight to the X-ray room. “Maybe they could tell what you’re supposed to be!”

“Oh please ask them!” Apple Bloom said fretfully, “They said they didn’t know but maybe if they think real hard about it... I just gotta know!”

“I’ll be right outside, Apple Bloom,” Applejack assured her, “Don’t you worry ah’ll get right in touch. Uh, that said, do ya know who Scootaloo’s parents are?”

Apple Bloom nodded. “Yeah this real nice lady named Cheerilee. She’s the school librarian too!”

Applejack nodded, “Yeah ah think ah know how to get ahold of her then.”

And with that, Apple Bloom had to stand perfectly still for a barrage of X-rays. It was even more tortuous than taking a school photo, and that says something. She had to grin and bear it though, well she couldn’t even grin because that would involve moving. The doctor’s assistant X-ray specialist, a cool looking lady with blue and white hair, moved the machine around Apple Bloom, making her hold still while she ran off and fired it from behind a lead curtain.

“Are you sure this is safe?” Apple Bloom asked worriedly when the lady ran back there.

“Oh, no no no X-rays are perfectly safe,” the technician assured her. “You would have to be exposed to them all day every day, over and over again for years, before you were in any real danger. Say for instance, if you’re an X-ray technician. That’s why I have to use the lead screen, but it’s safe for you.”

“Ah guess...” Apple Bloom said still nervously.

“Of course they could give you cancer just like that,” the technician went on blithely, even cheerfully, “But you also could have gotten struck by lightning out in the parking lot, and you could have suffered a fatal heart attack in the waiting room, and I don’t see you worrying about that!”

“Well ah wasn’t!” Apple Bloom complained worriedly.

“More X-rays hit you from space every year,” she argued, “So don’t worry about it, and hold still! You need to stay perfectly still or it will come out blurry, and then the doctor won’t be able to see your broken bones!”

“Ah ain’t got any brok—”

“Ah! Still.”

“But–”

“Still~”

So Apple Bloom grinned and bore it, resolving to never walk outside again without a lead umbrella over her head. She may have been feeling a mite more alarmist than usual today, what with the whole changing into an animal thing frazzling her nerves. Just one of those days, you know? At last it was over, and Apple Bloom jogged out of the X-ray room, pausing to look at the technician and say,

“You’re bein’ awfully professional about this.”

“Hmm?” the technician said tapping on an embedded keyboard and not paying a whole lot of attention.

“You know, not referrin’ to the fact that I ain’t all human anymore.”

“Your X-rays should be ready in 20 minutes or so,” she responded distantly, “Don’t put weight on it until the doctor has verified nothing is broken.”

“Weight on what?” Apple Bloom complained irritably. “Mah tail?”

The technician furrowed her brow. “No your—” she said, then turned to squint at Apple Bloom, “Wait, what?”

Apple Bloom looked back at the technician nervously as the lady’s eyes got wider and wider, trying to keep her tail from twitching behind her. Darn thing had a mind of its own. Apple Bloom pulled her pants up again and cleared her throat nervously.

“Back into the machine!” the technician shouted, pushing Apple Bloom into the X-ray room again.

“Nooooo!” Apple Bloom cried... but there was nothing to be done about it.

So, after getting extra special X-rays on her... her tail Apple Bloom was finally free of the evil technician. The Nurse Snowheart was gone, returning to the school to let that poor English class out of their self imposed imprisonment. Applejack, Big Mac and Granny were still there, and so was Doctor Stable, which was sensible as it was his office after all.

Once the doctor got his claws on her, he pushed her through a battery of tests that made her head spin. Some moments stood out in her head.

“Hmm, you’re running a fever...” he pondered looking at the thermometer. “...or maybe not. Most animals have a higher body temperature.”

“Ah see we’re off to a great start here.”

“Don’t get snippy with me young lady!”

...

“May I take a blood sample?” he asked eagerly, “If it becomes isolated from the process it might be the key to getting you back to normal again!”

“Really?” Apple Bloom asked hopefully.

The doctor sort of wilted, “No, not really. But it would be tragic if it became an option in the future and we had not done it. Plus I can run some tests on it.”

“Ah guess...” Apple Bloom said unhappily. She didn’t have any problem with needles, but she just didn’t see how this was going to help anything.

...

“We should go check on the cows,” Big Mac said at one point as the afternoon got on. Apple Bloom gave him a sad look, but he was right.

“You two can handle it,” Granny instructed to Big Mac and Applejack. “Ah’ll stay with Apple Bloom.”

“But—!” Applejack protested.

“No buts!” Granny insisted. “You ain’t doin her any favors stayin’ here and gettin’ in the way. This way you can settle things at the farm and have dinner ready for us when we come home.” She emphasized those last words very clearly. Apple Bloom just wanted to be home now, and away from that stupid school and this scary office that was full of staring people and tests.

Thankfully before she left, Applejack insisted on trying her best to get ahold of her friend Rarity, and, by extension Sweetie Belle. Apple Bloom wished she was old enough for a cell phone because that would have made it so much easier to just contact them directly. As is, Applejack could only stand there trying to convince Rarity not to panic. The conversation was, of course, one sided, but Apple Bloom could pick up some of Rarity’s panicked words on the other side thanks to her “super ears”.

“Hey Rarity,” Applejack had said all friendly-like.

“..., hello Applejack!” came Rarity’s tinny voice over the phone’s speaker.

“Say, Sweetie Belle doesn’t have animal ears does she?” Applejack asked casually.

“...y, what?”

“Big old conical ears on her head, all movin’ around. She doesn’t have those, right?”

“... ... a joke, Applejack?”

“What about a tail? Sweetie Belle got a tail growing in?”

“... do you mean a tail??”

“Just what ah said! And does her tail look just like her head hair?”

“... Belle does not ... ... tail!”

“Well, that’s a relief,” Applejack said, leaning against the wall as she talked. “What about the ears though? Her ears movin’ to the top of her head?”

“... don’t know, Applejack. ... ... this about?”

“Well mah sister got herself cursed to turn into an animal or something, and she was with Sweetie and Scootaloo when it happened, so I was wonderin’ if the curse got them too?”

“... ... curse?! Sweetie ... isn’t ... ... check on ... ... hold on Sweetie ...’s coming! (click) (bzzzzz)”

Applejack called her back a couple times, finally got ahold of her.

“Rarity!” Applejack said urgently, “Ah didn’t mean like a curse ah meant like some kind of enchantment or somethin’”

“...! ...! could you ...! Sweetie is ... the poor dear her ... is ruined ... ... all my fauhauhault!”

“Sorry to hear that Rarity, but ah really gotta know. Is Sweetie Belle changing into some kind of non-human critter?”

“...-human?! ... dare ... Applejack! Sweetie is ... ... ... ... I know and ...”

“I know—ah know, Rarity! Ah didn’t mean it like that! I meant...”

...it went on like that for some time.

Apple Bloom still wasn’t sure if Sweetie was or wasn’t cursed after that. Applejack seemed satisfied though, and didn’t say anything about it, so Apple Bloom had to guess Sweetie was probably fine. And by extension, Scootaloo would be fine too. It’d been even harder to get in touch with Scootaloo, but one of Applejack’s friends had the number to the library memorized, and calling the library and asking for Cheerilee got a swift if unsatisfying answer.

“She’s out?” Applejack asked in aggravation.

“...” came the quiet answer.

“Where would she be this time of day?”

“maybe ... skate ...?”

“Well track her down. And check for animal ears!”

“... ears, ... ... ... joke?”

“Ah ain’t joking Ms. Cheerilee. You gotta check on your daughter right now.”

“... believe ...?”

“Wh– this ain’t a prank!”

“... call ... library before”

“Wh– ah—”

“(click)”

“She hung up!” Applejack uttered, staring at the phone in outrage.

Applejack didn’t call the library back, but she did call her other friend one more time, being tactful enough not to tell her about the three stupid kids who might have accidentally turned themselves into animals. Her friend said she’d get Ms. Cheerilee to call Applejack directly, apparantly, but there weren’t no word from the librarian before Applejack had to get going.

The doctor paused long enough for Apple Bloom to hug her sister and her big brother both tenderly, before they headed off in their truck promising to come back before dinner. Granny was still with her, but Apple Bloom felt sad and lost, just listening to it pull out of the parking lot, while at the mercy of the terrible tongue depressor.

“Open your mouth and say ah,” the doctor squinted over the tongue depressor, then started poking Apple Bloom’s teeth. Apple Bloom wiggled uncomfortably saying, “Ah ahh ah ah?”

“I’m not sure how to ask you this,” said the doctor pulling out the tongue depressor and standing back a pace, “But could you please use your own fingers to wiggle your canines?”

Apple Bloom gave him a confused look as to why. Though what he said was straightforward enough, why would he want her to do that? So, she just fiddled around with her teeth finding the pointy one and wiggling it just like she was told. “Ah fo– I do– thi– it,” she said uncertainly, when the tooth just came out in her hand. “Whaaaaaapt?”

“Oh dear, this isn’t good,” the doctor said with an actual note of concern, looking down at Apple Bloom’s canine tooth sitting there in her hand, the part that came out going all the way to the tooth’s bloody root. And she carefully checked the other one, and it was loose too!

“Why are my teef fallin’ out?” she asked the doctor tearfully.

“My dear child,” he said compassionately, “I am afraid you appear to be becoming an herbivore.”

“H-huhf?”

The doctor gave a short, distant laugh, saying, “This is the most unorthodox phenomenon, I’m sorry it’s just something I never thought I would say to a patient. I happen to have heard that herbivores have no canine teeth, which is why humans are classified as omnivores. You might have to get used to having a gap between your incisors and your molars.”

“Well thath justh greath,” Apple Bloom said irritably, trying not to mess up her other loose teeth. She wasn’t succeeding very well.

“Was there any pain when it came out?” the doctor asked her worriedly. Apple Bloom shook her head. He seemed relieved at that, saying, “It might be a natural part of the process. Whatever phenomenon this is you should count yourself lucky that it’s such a painless process. Not that you aren’t in a bad... place right now, but I can think of many ways it could have been so much worse.”

Later on he had actually checked a dental manual to double check, because the canines weren’t the only teeth she was losing, saying, “I can’t understand why the process would impossibly alter your existing teeth, except for the canines and first bicuspids which are falling out. Are any of your other teeth wiggly at all?”

Apple Bloom shook her head, “Jus thothe four pairth” she said, though there was only two pairs left now, and one tooth in her upper jaw.

“Again I suppose we have to count our blessings,” he said thoughtfully. Apple Bloom was pretty sure she understood what he was getting at. There wasn’t even any blood after they came out, her gums sealing up like a charm. Now if only she could stop lisping.

...

“Can you feel this?”

“Yesh”

“Can you feel this?”

“Yesh!”

“Can you feel–”

“Yesh ah can feel every par’ of mah thail!”

“Well, you can’t be a horse, at least,” the doctor said adjusting his glasses. “Your ehum, tailbone seems to be extending the full length of your tail, as opposed to a short tailbone with a long brush at the end of it. If not for the matter of your teeth, I’d guess a cat’s tail, but...”

Apple Bloom couldn’t stop tonguing the gaps that her pulled teeth had left between the molars and the incisors. There were still no others falling out thank goodness, but it felt so weird in her mouth. “Yeahu,” she said vaguely, crossing her eyes to fiddle with her dentition. Apple Bloom was sitting in Granny’s lap at the moment, with Granny’s arms supportively hugged around her midsection.

Apple Bloom actually hadn’t been able to sit with Granny like this in quite a while.

“I would like to make a call,” the doctor said with a tired look in his eyes, “I’m afraid it might give you the wrong impression though. I can honestly say I mean absolutely no offense in suggesting this, and I respect and recognize you as a person in every meaningful sense of the word, and I only hope that it can help you in some fashion.”

“Well spit it out then!” Granny declared above the distracted Apple Bloom.

“I think it our best bet to identify what Apple Bloom’s er, animal is might be to call a very competent and capable woman I know who is a ehum, veterinarian.”

“Whah?!” Apple Bloom exclaimed, looking at him wide eyed and pulling her tongue out from messing with her teeth. “Ah mean whutsh? Augh, shtupid theeth!”

“Put yer tongue on the roof o’ yer mouth when yer say ‘t’” Granny said to her. Apple Bloom twisted around puzzled but then tried it.

“Deeth. Teeth. Teeth hay it worksh!”

The doctor cleared his throat. Oh right. Veterinarian. Apple Bloom’s ears went flat again, and she couldn’t look him in the eyes, but she said as clearly as she could, “Yesh thatsh fahn,” in a somber voice that matched with her opinion on that sort of thing.

Granny was a huge help getting Apple Bloom to speak raht—ah mean—right again. Once Granny said, “Push yer tongue out more when yer say ‘s’ so’s it don’t whistle so much,” it was so much easier to say it.

“Ssh. Ss. Eth. Ess. Wow, how did you know, Granny?” Apple Bloom exclaimed in surprise.

Granny smiled all crinkly and said, “Ah got a lot of experience with losin’ teeth Apple Bloom!”

“Oh, yeah,” Apple Bloom smiled guiltily, blushed and hunched her shoulders. “Ah forgot abouth that. Th-thanks Granny... ah mean, for everything.”

“That’s might kind o’ yer Apple Bloom,” Granny said with a smile in return, “Ah ‘preciate it.”

The good Doctor Stable exhausted his options eventually. There just wasn’t anything wrong with Apple Bloom aside from her changing into an animal. She was healthy as a—a healthy person. All he really could do for her was tell her what he’s found so far, in the vain hope that it might somehow help her predicament.

He sat Granny and Apple Bloom down to talk with them, and Apple Bloom felt so tiny in that chair next to Granny. The doc had said it’d only been like 8 inches of height lost, mostly from her arms and legs which were supposedly shrinking faster than her torso and head, but it was a huge difference. It wasn’t so much her tail getting longer anymore at all, as her body getting shorter to match it!

What was even worse, Apple Bloom had to give up her clothes for lost. She lost her shoes first, which made her even shorter of course, and took away her heel support. Not that she was having trouble standing on her toes. She was having the very opposite, really! But Apple Bloom was just getting too small for all her clothes to stay on comfortably, if at all. So she lost her pants, lost her shoes, and basically was having to walk around barefoot—bare toed with a muddy green hospital gown. She hardly felt like herself anymore, like she was just a little kid again.

The ironic thing is because the gown fastened together from behind it was easy to get her tail out from underneath it through the gap back there.

“While we’re waiting for the v– for my friend,” the doctor said having seated them down, “I would like to tell you what I’ve managed to observe so far,” He started pacing in front of them waving a hand in the air as he spoke.

“Young Apple Bloom here has a fully functioning tail and motile ears as you’ve no doubt observed,” he said, “Her temperature is above normal, which is probably normal but without knowing the exact nature of her transformation I can’t say for sure. Her blood tests are normal, which doesn’t help much in this situation. I don’t have facilities for blood work, would have to send it to a place in the city for that to be done. But what I could tell was her red cell count is normal. Platelet count, normal. Cholesterol levels, low. You’re a very healthy girl, Apple Bloom.

“The exact process by which your tissues are changing in size proportionally is unknown,” he continued, “But your bone structure seems to be adjusting along with musculature, tendons and, well... it all seems rather magical to me that it’s proceeding so safely. You already know your hearing is exceptional, and I can confirm that your ear canals appear to be both functional and complete, with no damage to the skull apparant in their... movement to the top of your head.

“You have a good deal more vertebrae now, that is segments of your spinal cord. Sensible really, considering your er, tail. Animals with tails have more vertebrae than humans, I would assume. Your dentition is decidedly herbivorous, with your molars and incisors somehow adjusting in place, despite the fact that teeth simply do not grow, while your first bicuspids and canines fell out entirely. I can’t say much about your digestive system, but I would recommend great care in what you eat from now on. I doubt it will be as simple as eating seeds or... whatever you’re adapted for.”

Doctor Stable sighed then, and crouched down to look Apple Bloom in the eye, “I know you weren’t expecting any good news,” he told her, “I’ve done all I can to measure and document the process so that any opportunity we have to fix things won’t be lost. It’s entirely possible that this... process will reverse itself as mysteriously as it came. There’s really no conclusions that can be drawn from what can only be described as, well, magic. So that’s my final advice to you, little girl. Never draw any conclusions about what is happening to you that you cannot deduce through hard evidence, not even that you will transform completely, or that you won’t wake up tomorrow and it’ll all just be a bad dream. This... transformation is beyond that which anyone can draw conclusions from. That means just about anything, and I mean anything, is possible.”

“Hello,” came a new voice in a melodious alto, a goldenrod lady with another set of blue white hair tied up in a ponytail poking her head around the corner. “So I heard you need a vet?”

“Dr. Cureall, it’s good to see you so promptly,” Doctor Stable said ironically, straightening up from where he was addressing Apple Bloom and facing the new entry.

“Oh don’t be so formal,” she said, “You can call me Jane you know that. You said you had an animal you needed looked at?” She waltzed in, looking a bit uncertain at the somber atmosphere of Granny and Apple Bloom sitting there.

Doctor Stable cleared his throat and said, “Yes um, I said that to be discreet, but in reality what I need your help with is a lot... stranger. A lot stranger.” He smiled nervously showing a hesitance he hadn’t until just now.

“You’re startin’ to scare me doc,” Dr. Cureall said, laughing nervously, putting her hands on her hips and looking at him with a wry testing smile. “An animal is hurt? Someone got themselves bit? Spit it out already!”

“I need you to identify the animal my patient is transforming into,” he said hastily. He added a chuckle. She didn’t respond.

“I’m serious,” he said with a frown.

“Ha!” she barked loudly, “That’s a good one! You didn’t call me all the way over here to make a joke did you? I never played you for a prankster, doctor Doc.”

“It ain’t a prank,” Apple Bloom piped up behind her.

“Girl,” Dr. Cureall said, turning to look down at Apple Bloom, “I don’t know what he told you, but that’s just the silliest thing I ever,”

The vet stopped speaking abruptly, and just blinked at Apple Bloom.

Apple Bloom’s ear twitched.

Dr. Cureall’s eyes rolled up in her head, and she would have crumpled to the floor if Doctor Stable wasn’t immediately there holding her up with his arms under her shoulders. He lowered her to the floor with a grunt, then stood up adjusting his glasses, saying with a sigh, “I’ll go fetch the smelling salts.”

He came back in short order. “Here, wave this under her nose,” he said handing Apple Bloom a tiny foul smelling bottle.

“Why me?” she asked nervously.

“I want her to see you when she wakes up,” the doctor said flatly, “All this pussyfooting around is becoming rather tiresome.”

Apple Bloom frowned, but did as she was told, and the lady in question sneezed violently then started to come to. Apple Bloom wasn’t sure if the doctor lady was all the way awake, because she didn’t say anything, just kept staring forward blankly. “Are you OK?” Apple Bloom asked at last.

“Oh jezus it talks!” Dr. Cureall yelped, scrambling back against the counter she was propped up against.

Some pussyfooting later, they managed to calm Dr. Cureall down and get her standing again. She warmed up to what had happened relatively quickly, and was starting to barrage Apple Bloom with questions, so Apple Bloom just decided to answer them all for her at once so she wouldn’t ask her those uncomfortable questions, like ripping off a bandaid.

“Yes it’s real. Yesh ah have a tail. Yes ah can feel it. Yes thoshe are mah ears, and they work fine. No I wasn’t like this thish mornin’. No I don’t know why. It all thstarted with a dream. Ah’m supposed to be taller. An’ no ah don’t know whath I’m changin’ into, so can you pleasetell me what ah am?”

Dr. Cureall gave her an uncertain look and asked, “Are you a fairy?”

“Whu?”

“Are you an alien...?” the vet tried again, looking around for confirmation with an awkward grin.

“No ah’m justh a girl!” Apple Bloom said with her fists balled at her sides. “Ah meant what animal am ah thurnin’ into?”

The vet still looked at Apple Bloom uncomprehendingly. Apple Bloom didn’t know how to deal with this lady, it was frustrating! Doctor Stable thankfully cleared his throat then, and attracted attention to himself, saying to Dr. Cureall,

“Apple Bloom here is, or was an ordinary girl in her Freshman year attending the local high school. As of this afternoon due to some sort of supernatural phenomenon experienced two nights ago, she has been spontaneously adopting the morphological characteristics of an unknown animal. The process is unknown, the cause is unknown, and the most I have been able to accomplish is merely to document the phenomenon. While we aren’t giving up on finding some explanation or cause for this and potentially restoring her normal life, we would nevertheless be grateful if you could use your extensive study of non-human animals, to identify just what little Apple Bloom here has to expect.”

“This girl’s in high school?” Dr. Cureall said in a bewildered tone, kneeling down to Apple Bloom’s ...current height. “She doesn’t look like she should be out of elementary school!”

“Yes, she’s been getting ...progressively smaller,” Doctor Stable said, crossing his arms and hmming, “Actually it’s probably a good time to measure your height and weight a second time, Apple Bloom, to estimate the rate of change.”

The doctor, the vet, and Granny followed Apple Bloom along to the scale. There were other staff at this clinic but they mostly kept their distance, giving Apple Bloom these awful fearful looks whenever she caught their eye. Not that she could catch anyone’s eye much anymore, with how tall the counters and desks were now. She was so short it was terrible! Apple Bloom hadn’t been this short since well, in like forever! It was like some sort of sick joke, after how hard she tried to grow up big and tall and finally getting past Sweetie Belle’s height she’d at least been the tallest of the Cutie Major Crusaders. Now she bet those two could both see the top of her head without even going on tiptoes. The animal-eared top of her head.

“It’s not just the height,” Dr. Cureall insisted, “She’s just so... I mean, adorable! No offense. It’s just... that round face and– and those eyes!”

“It does appear that Apple Bloom is gaining some body fat,” Doctor Stable grudgingly agreed, “I suppose it could be seen as ‘baby’ fat as it were. It certainly would make about as much sense as anything else has today! But regardless, Apple Bloom if you please, I need you to step up onto the scale here.”

Testing her weight was relatively straightforward, and Apple Bloom stood up as straight as she could while he tested her height. Not that Apple Bloom was cheating or anything but she, she just didn’t want to get him inaccurate results or something. Not like she could have cheated anyways. She wondered if maybe they could use the tops of her ears instead of her head, just for another inch or two.

“I know you’re upset, but I need you to not skew the results please,” the doctor told her idly moving the top of the height measurer flatly onto her head. “No standing on your toes.”

“Huh?” Apple Bloom said uncomprehendingly for a moment, then she remembered she was standing on her toes this whole time. “Oh, uh, sorry,” she said. It was weirdly difficult putting her heels down. Not like a huge strain or anything, but it felt weird to sit on her feet, like they were the back of her legs or something.

“And straighten your knees,” the doctor added with a frown. Apple Bloom looked down and, dangit why did her legs feel so weird? She finally got her legs straight, with her heels planted on the bottom of the scale, but it felt so contorted and the angles were all off. “Thank you,” Doc Stable said in an even tone. “I’m glad we did this when we did. Now what I need you to do is sit down on the scale, with your back to the height rod.”

As if her day couldn’t get weirder. Apple Bloom’d never had a doctor’s visit measure her height like that. “Y-you sure?” she said in a rising tone of confusion.

“I’ll explain shortly,” he said, “Please, if you wouldn’t mind.”

Apple Bloom did as she was told, and with her tail pushing the hospital gown backwards there was just no way to do anything but put her naked butt on the scale platform. Then he didn’t measure from the top of her head, but laid it down on her shoulder! It was probably the weirdest height measuring she’d ever gotten, though his reasoning would prove quite sound, for a man whose entire world view has been shattered in a single office visit.

He made some calculations on paper and punched numbers into a calculator before explaining himself. “You’ve stated for the record that you are supposed to be 4 feet, 9 inches. When I measured you initially, you were 3 feet 11 inches tall, and your second measurement... standing was 2 inches shorter. That means you are losing roughly one inch per hour, and assuming that is happening at a steady rate I can estimate when you first started to transform.”

Apple Bloom’s eyes widened at that. “Wow!” she said, “That would be leally–really helpful! Maybe it was that dream the night before lasth!”

The doctor smiled fixedly, and said, “Well, unfortunately it isn’t that simple. By my calculations, your height started to decrease some time around 6 this morning.”

Apple Bloom wilted a little bit. “Oh, that doesn’t really helpf at all.” She brightened again though, and said, “Though ah did wake up around 6, so maybe it started when ah woke up?”

“Did anything unusual happen to you then?” the doctor asked hopefully. Apple Bloom had to shake her head though.

“Only unusual thing was the dream, an’ thath wasn’t lasth night.”

“Delayed effect?” he suggested, with a lopsided grin. “As long as we’re shooting for the moon, might as well assume that.”

“So why did you have me sit down?” Apple Bloom asked humorlessly, “You shaid you were gonna esplain!”

The doctor got a bit nervous at that, and adjusted his glasses, saying, “Eum, well the reason is so that I can continue measuring your height. Your legs are... changing in ways that don’t facilitate you... standing up on them bipedally, so I needed a baseline from your torso to your head, which I hope at least will remain morphologically consistent.”

“Mah legs...” Apple Bloom looked down at the nondescript hospital gown concealing her lower body from herself. It didn’t feel weird to stand on her toes, and it really should feel weird, and in fact it should be hurting to do that for this long. Everyone seemed to be paying attention to her as she pulled up the gown to look at her legs.

As soon as she did she dropped it. “T-that cain’t be good,” she said in a bit of shock. Her toes were holding her up because they– they looked really really weird. She didn’t want to look at them anymore.

With the fiasco of measuring her height over, Apple Bloom was free to be stared at uncomfortably by Dr. Cureall.

“Hmm,” the veterinarian lady said, lifting up Apple Bloom’s arm, looking at her hand. “Hmm,” she repeated looking at her feet. “You mind if I...?” she said with hesitance, hovering over where Apple Bloom’s tail was sticking out through the part in the back of the hospital gown.

“Yeah ah guessh,” Apple Bloom said moodily. It didn’t feel bad when the doctor scrunched her fingers into the thick red locks of that tail, but it was still a source of shame for Apple Bloom. Something she just wanted to get rid of, but at the same time somehow the thought of getting rid of it scared her. She couldn’t just chop it off, it was her— but no, it wasn’t her tail! It was just some tail that started appearing there! But she sort of felt like it was her tail. It was... weird.

“And how about your ears?” Dr. Cureall said in an excited if brash voice. Apple Bloom’s ears immediately went flat at the thought of the doctor messing with them. She forced herself to relax though, and tried to imagine what it was like when they straightened out, and that sort of worked at least to get them straightening up and available.

“Y-yeah,” Apple Bloom said unconfidently, “No problem!”

Light touches made them flick, but then the doctor grabbed one firmly in her thumb and index finger, yet somehow not painfully. “Woah,” Apple Bloom said dizzily as the weird muscle thing up there kept trying to flick while being held still. “That feels weird.”

The vet let her go without addressing that statement, which Apple Bloom was pretty fine with as long as it didn’t mean any more manhandling of her ears. Those things were sensitive!

The vet had to look under her gown, though. Apple Bloom couldn’t bear to look, herself. To Dr. Cureall’s credit, she didn’t so much as flinch at whatever she saw down there. No, she remained real professional about it, and made sure to ask permission before poking Apple Bloom in the tummy with a tentative finger.

The doctor stepped back with her hands on her hips and let Apple Bloom gratefully drop the gown back over her body. Apple Bloom was small enough that it pretty much covered her head to toe by now.

Finally Doctor Stable pointed Dr. Cureall to Apple Bloom’s mouth, where the veterinarian seemed to find the new gaps in between Apple Bloom’s teeth to be absolutely fascinating.

“Well,” Dr. Cureall said at last, “I can confidently say that I have no idea what you’re turning into.”

Apple Bloom’s ears went flat again. “Oh come on!” she protested, “Cain’t ah at leasth know that hwhile ah still can know?”

Dr. Cureall shook her head slowly, saying, “You got the ears of a horse, the tail of a cat, and I don’t even know about the mottling but some kind of holstein cow maybe? Your feet are um... unfinished so I can’t even say even or odd toed but I would assume some kind of ungulate. That and your dentition, but without knowing how it’s going to end up if your face stretches out it, could be anything from a deer to an giraffe! You’re all over the map as far as animals go!”

“Ohhh,” Apple Bloom whined looking down, then something occured to her. She looked back up at the vet again saying, “Wait, hwhat do you mean by mottling?”

“Well, um...” Dr. Cureall ran her tongue across her upper teeth saying, “J-just take a look at your chest. I suppose that’s something... new?”

With dread Apple Bloom pulled back the neck of the hospital gown and looked at the upper portion of her naked body underneath. What was once an even, healthy shade of lemon yellow was now broad and uneven blotches of yellow and a pale pink.

“Wh-uh?” Apple Bloom said dumbly dropping her hospital gown and looking at her arms, and now that she looked they were also covered in that patchy pattern. “A-ah don’t... what’s wrong with me?!” Her arms were shaking and she couldn’t stop them from shaking. “Why is this happening?” she said staring down at her arms. “Why me?” she shouted, stomping furiously on the ground, staring at the vet and shouting “Why me?!” one more time, in a voice that just couldn’t stay steady, just as shaky as her hands.

“G-g-granny...” Apple Bloom said in a quiet whimper. “Ah-ah need you to–”

“Ah’m so sorry Apple Bloom,” Granny Smith said emotionally, her broad pudgy arms wrapping around Apple Bloom. “You shouldn’t have to go through this.” Apple Bloom was so very tiny now. It was just a little bit, the doctor said, but she felt like a doll in her granny’s embrace. Something broke in Apple Bloom and she just choked back a sob. She just, she just stood there quietly, leaning into her grandmother’s tender embrace, feeling like she was going to fall over like a leaf if Granny let up on it one bit.

They stayed there like that for a timeless moment, until the vet who was kneeling down now in front of Apple Bloom said, “Can I see your arm again? I want to double check something.” Numbly Apple Bloom held her weird splotchy probably diseased arm out, and the nurse took Apple Bloom’s entirely too tiny hand to steady her arm, and traced a finger across the colored part—woah.

“Th’ hay?” Apple Bloom exclaimed forgetting her distress, as the vet’s finger rubbed up against the grain. “What are you doin’? That feels all catchy and uh...”

“Well, I know why you’re mottled at least,” the vet said, pointing at a yellow patch, then a pink splotch then another yellow patch. “This first part here is your skin, well, your old skin at least. It’s turning pink as your natural skin color recedes from it. It might not be well known, but every human being is pink without their chromanin pigments, and generally animals don’t have any pigment at all in their skin. Which is this second part here, where you’re pink and your skin is becoming softer and thicker. And this third part is actually turning yellow again because your pigment didn’t actually go away. It just... well, the reason animals don’t need pigment in their skin is because they don’t get sunburned due to a protective coat of... um... fur.”

“Fur,” Apple Bloom said unamusedly.

“I’m sorry,” Dr. Cureall said, “I wish I could put it any other—”

“No, no it’s okay,” Apple Bloom interrupted, sitting down against Granny’s legs. “Fur is better than bein’ all splotchy.” She laughed nervously looking at her arms again, “T-that’s why we called you right?” she said her voice unsteady and rising in pitch, “Nothin’ we didn’t expect. Because you’re a v-vet an’ ah’m just an a-a-animal. A-and... a-annd...” and she couldn’t continue.

“Oh Apple Bloom,” said Granny touseling her hair and probably putting her bow in disarray. Apple Bloom appreciated it. “Ah cain’t even imagine what yer– what yer goin’ through right now, but you’re safe with us ah promise ya. You don’t need to think that we’ll treat ye any less than family, not if you’re a girl or a gopher.”

“Ain’t what I’m worried abouth,” Apple Bloom mumbled under her breath.

“Hur?” Granny asked tilting a round ear downward.

“Ah said it’d be awfully silly if ah was a gopher,” Apple Bloom said in a joking tone, though it always came out sounding like she was annoyed when she did that. “With this big old long thail sticking outta mah gopher butth!”

“Heh heh heh!” Granny laughed, “That’s mah Apple Bloom, alright.”

The veterinarian frowned in consternation and said, “I think I might have a guess as to what you’re turning into, if you feel up to hearing it, my guess that is, not the absolute truth.”

Apple Bloom started to immediately say yes, but then fear flared in her, and she didn’t want to feel like she had felt before. The more she learned it seemed, the scareder she got. But it was just eating her up inside not knowing anything about what was going to happen to her next. “Alright,” she said grudgingly, “Gimme your bes’ shot. Ah can take it.”

“Your ears are the best clue,” the vet started to say, “There aren’t many animals that have ears like a horse. Deer are broad and flat, goats are very round tipped like olive leaves, cows have a kite shape to them, and cats are sparsely furred and thin, and often have a distinctive split along the side. Wolf ears have long tufts on the inside, as do foxes, and we’ve long since ruled out carnivores at any rate. If your toes continue to... to degenerate, then you should end up with a single er, toe, thus odd toed ungulate, which narrows things down to horses, zebras and uh, tapirs. I’m just not going to entertain that last one because they have four toes, despite their relatives. You certainly can’t be a cow, as you have only two nipples still. Not many animals outside of humans and horses have two nipples in fact.”

“H-horse, huh,” Apple Bloom said detachedly. Her eyes widened then and she said, “Wait, you looked at mah nipples?!”

Dr. Cureall rolled her eyes, “Yes I examined you. It’s alright I promise I didn’t do anything embarassing. Why else do you think I was poking your belly earlier?”

Apple Bloom blinked at the unrelated question, “Uh, I don’t... know?”

“I was only confirming the presence, and number,” Cureall huffed irritatedly, “...of your nipples. Sorry if that offended you.”

“You weren’t touchin mah chest at all though!” Apple Bloom protested.

That made Dr. Cureall blush fiercely, suddenly stumbling on her words as she said, “W-well that is to say I’m sorry but you might not uh know this but uh, humans are kind of... unique among other animals. We evolved–we evolved from a separate ancestor than all carnivores, herbivores, ungulates, rodents or, or anything really. Primates are all on their own on the evolutionary tree, with no common ancestor until almost the very earliest mammals.”

She cleared her throat, “Sorry, I’m stalling here. What I mean to say is, if you look at monkeys, apes, gorillas, chimpanzees, and, humans, you’ll see they have two nipples on their chest. And... nothing else does.”

The vet folded her hands a few times before adding, “You don’t.”

It still took Apple Bloom a few seconds of grinding gears in her spinning head, but then her face fell and her eyes widened, and she jerked one of her hands into the sleeve feeling at her chest. It was just a chest. Just a chest. She felt down around her belly and...

“Well... that’h just freaky,” Apple Bloom concluded wide-eyed. “A-ah didn’t even notishe. But they’re... supposhed to be down there?”

The vet nodded.

“Y’sure?”

The vet nodded again uneasily. Apple Bloom just stuck her arm out of the gown’s sleeve again, and crossed them over each other, grumbling petulantly, “Well, it ain’t nearly as freaky as growin’ fur.”

Author's Note

I am entirely too much in love with comparative anatomy.

Coming Home

“So, you haven’t suffered any distress such as gas, soreness, or nausea?”

Apple Bloom shook her head, “No I didn’t have any problem with mah lunch... ah didn’t use any of the roast beef of course ‘cause that dream kinda shook me... guess it was for the best.” Still sitting on the new examination table. Still in that brightly lit pleasant white sterile medical clinic. She was being questioned by the vet still, with some success, but not much.

“I really don’t know how to break it to you,” the vet said in a conflicted tone, looking at her mouth critically, “It’s nothing weirder, just kind of bad news. You might wish you turned into a cow for the kind of trouble horses have with diet and nutrition.”

Apple Bloom winced, holding her stomach, saying “So ah’m gonna get sick from a cheese sandwich?”

“If you were a horse, yes,” Dr. Cureall said frankly, “But you’re clearly not there yet. There’s no biological process that could turn you into a horse so it’s not like any of us can assume what’s even happening in your digestive system. Maybe your cheese sandwich is turning into healthy forage? What I’m most concerned with is what you eat from now on.”

Apple Bloom looked aside but didn’t protest. She was going to bet that bacon was off the menu though. The vet took that as encouragement and went on,

“I’m not even sure how far this is going to go,” the vet said with her hands held behind her back looking up thoughtfully, “And I still say that I’m just guessing at what you are. That tail just doesn’t make sense, and your weight? You’re already down to 45 pounds, which is smaller than even a newborn horse! Maybe a pony... but even then, I mean you’re just about 15 years old, so you couldn’t be a newborn. Unless you’re turning into a baby pony?”

“Can we please stop talkin’ about how shmall ah am?” Apple Bloom said fussily. “Ah don’t want to turn intho a baby pony. I–just... just tell Granny what she should feed me.”

Dr. Cureall frowned at Apple Bloom worriedly, but turned to Granny and said, “It’s not very complicated, just tricky. What horses eat are healthy green grasses and legumes, but not too green and some supplement of grains during the winter, oh and salt. She’ll need about 3% of her body weight in food per day. The ratio should go more toward grains if she um... physically exerts herself more, but not in any other situation, as eating too many calories is often fatal to horses.”

Granny frowned right back at Dr. Cureall and said, “If you recall, we do care for horses down at Sweet Apple Acres. Can’t herd cows without ‘em. And they are quite healthy, thank you very much.”

The vet blushed and said in a flustered tone, “R-r-right I’m sorry I just, I’m so used to working with clients who haven’t been around horses.”

“Haven’t you worked with us before?” Granny asked in a curiously puzzled tone.

Dr. Cureall looked at her blankly, and said, “Y–no I haven’t, and I can’t imagine why. Who is your usual veterinarian?”

Granny scratched her arm, saying, “Well, yer know I– I don’t recall. I think she moved outta town recently? Hadn’t thought of it as we don’t got no sick animals at the moment. Guess we woulda called you?”

“Yeah, that makes sense I suppose,” the vet said without looking entirely satisfied by it. “Still, I would like to take a look at your horses to make sure none are colicky or have any respi’tory problems.”

Granny put a hand on her forehead, saying “While I’ll be happy to talk with ye on mah own time, ah think mah granddaughter takes precedence here.”

Dr. Cureall looked at Apple Bloom for an uncomfortably long time before saying, “Sorry, for all I know about animals I don’t think it’s safe for me to make any conclusions about someone who’s half-way. You seem perfectly healthy. Are ya hungry?”

Apple Bloom shook her head.

“Well then all I can really say is, if you get hungry eat a very little bit of everything and see what sticks, but be really careful because if something disagrees with you, ya might not be able to throw up anymore.”

“Ok,” Apple Bloom said wretchedly.

“Now I mean that,” the vet asserted, “Horses cannot throw up. If you eat too much or something bad, you’re going to have to wait for it to go all the way through ya, so be careful.”

“Is there anything else ye can tell us?” Granny asked Dr. Cureall urgently, but the doc just shrugged and shook her head.

“Nope, that’s about all I can do at this point. If you end up with a little horse on your hands then call me and I’ll come right over, but until then I suppose we just have to wait.”

There were a lot less clinic staff watching Apple Bloom now that the novelty had passed. The clinic was a busy place ferrying the injured and ill around to be treated. As such, the uncomfortable silence between the two doctors, Apple Bloom, and Granny, was punctuated by the buzz of a printer in another room and various quiet voices and footsteps. The doctor’s clinic was as close to a hospital as you could get, and Apple Bloom just felt like it was some alien world she’d been thrown into, except she was the alien and the world was normal. Just didn’t make sense how quiet and calm everything was. She felt... unimportant, insignificant.

“I think it would be best if she spent some time in a familiar place,” Doctor Stable suggested gently, apparantly having noticed the same thing. “We don’t know how far this is going to go, and she really needs to be with her family during her final... until she’s seen this through.”

“I’m sure your granddaughter and grandson are terribly worried,” he said to Granny. “You have a wonderful and healthy granddaughter here, which unfortunately means that there’s just not much more that I can do for her.”

“Ah’ll call ‘em to pick us up,” Granny said reluctantly, looking at Apple Bloom with sad eyes saying, “Ah’m sorry we couldn’t do more for ya,”

“No it’s okay Granny it’h–” Apple Bloom sniffed, “Ah mean it’s not okay but what can you do? Just have to... try to keep it together...”

Granny dialed up Applejack’s number, and it was odd because there was a crashing on the other end of the line as if she was walking through thick brush.

-“Yeah?” came Applejack’s voice.

“Hello Applejack it’s Granny,” Granny said in that pleasant thin voice of hers, “The doctors are all done here, and I was wonderin’ if you could come and pick us up?”

There was a pause before Applejack said, “Any good news?”

“Afraid not dearie,” Granny said to her, “But at least there ain’t no bad news.”

“How is she?” Applejack asked.

“Can ah thalk to her?” Apple Bloom asked, reaching up for the phone in Granny’s hand. Granny gave Apple Bloom her phone, and Apple Bloom fiddled with it a bit before just talking into it like it was a microphone. She certainly didn’t need it next to her ears. “Hi, Applejack!” she said into it.

“Apple Bloom!” came Applejack’s relieved voice. “How are you doing?”

“It’s like Granny shaid,” Apple Bloom confirmed, “Ah’m a hlittle smaller, but otherwise okay so far.”

“You just wait there and ah’ll be right by to pick you up,” said Applejack boisterously. “Ah might be a while ‘cause I gotta get outta the woods here.”

“Why are ya in the woods?” Apple Bloom asked curiously.

“Tryin’ to find that clearing of yours!” Applejack answered, “Ain’t nothing doing though. We’ll have to try again together, see if you can remember.”

Apple Bloom sighed, but said, “Okay Applejack ah’ll try my best. Just... please hurry.”

“Ah’m on my way.”

They may have made a bit of a mistake waiting for AJ’s truck out in the parking lot. Soon as Granny and Apple Bloom left the hospital, the press descended on them. But that sounds a lot worse than it was because Canterlot wasn’t a really big town, and there was only one news station. Because of that, there was only one news crew there, two reporters, neither of whom seemed to be jockeying for position. So it was only a maybe mistake, not a really truly.

“Excuse me, do you have a moment?” The man had the same hair as the vet’s, bi-color blue, but had a shorter messier hairstyle and a big red and white baseball cap, and his skin was an even brighter yellow than Apple Bloom’s had... used to be. The woman’s hair fell in messy orange vines from underneath her fedora and she was more of a cream color. Really if you lined the three of them up from woman to Apple Bloom to man, you’d get an even transition in shades of yellow.

“We don’t want no trouble now,” Granny said threateningly. Apple Bloom just looked at the camera already pointed in her direction.

“We just want to ask a few questions,” the lady asserted.

“We’re with the news,” the man explained.

“Really?” Granny said surprisedly, looking at the semicircle of cameras and microphones around them, “Ah had no idea.”

“When did you first–” the lady started but Granny immediately interrupted saying,

“No I don’t think so! We don’t need no dag reporters cain’t yer see she’s goin through enough?”

“Granny,” Apple Bloom said thoughtfully, “No, let them ask questions ah don’t mind. It might be their only chance!”

“What are ye goin’ on about?” she said worriedly in Apple Bloom’s direction.

“Just, please Granny!” Apple Bloom said tugging on Granny’s dress.

“When did you first notice any changes?” the lady interjected asking Apple Bloom directly this time. Granny just threw up her hands exasperatedly.

“They shtarted at 6 this mornin’ but,” Apple Bloom quickly qualified, “Ah didn’t really notice until after lunch today.”

“How did this happen?” the man asked quickly.

“Uh, ah don’t know, but some kind of magic dream ah think,” Apple Bloom offered. “Just uh, don’t touch any golden applesh if you dream about ‘em.”

“Has this ever happened to you before?” asked the lady in short order. Seems like they were alternating questions.

“No it never happened before in mah life!” Apple Bloom declared, “Or in anyone’s life! Maybe like ancient Greeshe or something ah dunno.”

“What are you changing into exactly?” the man asked with an extra note of curiosity because he honestly couldn’t tell.

“T-the vet saysh a horse,” Apple Bloom said nervously, “But it ain’t exactly clear. Ah ain’t never seen a horse this color, or this uh, small.”

The woman turned to the camera and gave a silent signal then. She paused a moment and a light went on, then said, “This is Channel 7 news reporting at the local hospital where a fantasy scenario seems to have come to life. This girl has reportedly been transforming overnight into some sort of small colorful horse. We bring you this exclusive interview with the subject of this unexplainable phenomenon.”

“What impact do you think this has on the scientific community?” the man said in a more grandstandy tone.

Apple Bloom looked at him oddly and said, “Uh ah don’t know, but if the shientific community could figure out how to change me back that’d be real nice.”

“And you say this has never happened before?” the lady put in equally dramatically.

Apple Bloom frowned, and said, “Well if it did, ah would already be a horse, so, no ith ain’t never happened before.”

“How do you think your life is going to change from this?” asked the reporter man.

“Uh, a lot?” Apple Bloom said dumbly, not sure what she should say. “Ah mean, ah cain’t go back to school and all that.”

“Which school are you attending?” the lady asked.

That made Apple Bloom pause. “There’s only one high school in town?” she suggested hesitantly.

“You’re in high school?!” the lady exclaimed taken completely by surprise there.

“Yeah, ah’m a Frethman!” Apple Bloom said with a little irritation bubbling around in her breast, “Ah just started hlookin’ this way when ah got shmaller!”

The man cleared his throat as the lady reporter looked away embarassed, and the man said, “What are you going to do when your transformation is complete?”

Well that was just a silly question. Apple Bloom put her hands on her hips and said, “What horses usually do? Ah don’t know, run around, eat grass?”

The man looked a little flustered at her answer, clearing his throat again and saying, “I see.”

That gave the woman a chance to recover for him, their double team of Apple Bloom being quite effective here. “Do you think this poses a danger to anyone else, or the community?” she asked.

Apple Bloom shook her head, “No it does pose a danger becausth there was this dream ah had about a golden apple, and this ish all cause I picked it, sho like ah said, watch out for golden applesh in your dreams!”

“Dreams of apples,” the lady said to the camera again, “Mysterious transformations, and one girl who remains an example to us all. This has been eyewitness news Channel 7.”

The lady paused a second, then turned to Apple Bloom and said in a more normal voice, “Thanks so much for your time. I’m sorry to hear this wasn’t better news. You should be able to see yourself on TV if you tune in at 10:00 tonight!” she added that last part a bit eagerly.

“Uh, thanks...” Apple Bloom smiled nervously, and crossed her hands behind her back. Doing that felt more uncomfortable, in her arms, than it should have. But Apple Bloom’s flexibility aside, the reporters left her alone then and it wasn’t long before the old green pickup rattled into the parking lot. Applejack was there but not Big Mac, probably so there’d be enough room for all three of them in the cab. Well, two and a half now. Applejack looked pretty good considering, she was smiling at least, if a bit haggard what with the worry lines and puffy eyes. Apple Bloom hoped she wasn’t going to upset Applejack too bad because of all this.

Being short was getting to be a real pain, because Apple Bloom had to climb to get into the cab of the truck now. No more walking up the step into it for her, it looked like. Applejack’s eyes widened when she saw Apple Bloom eye to eye, but Applejack didn’t say anything untoward, and just said in a friendly voice, “Saddle up Apple Bloom, we’re goin’ home.”

Granny followed along behind, and Apple Bloom couldn’t help but feel an immense relief as the truck pulled in reverse and the clinic diminished away in front of her. She felt a lot safer sandwiched in-between the warm bodies of her grandmother and her dearest sister. The sadness that she was going to lose all this, was tempered by that small comfort she felt right now. She was going home.

It was probably hopeless, but Apple Bloom remembered what the doctor said. She sure wasn’t going to let go without a fight. Unfortunately her book bag was... probably still in English class, so she had to think of stuff to ...think about on her own. She ended up just going over simple random multiplication problems. Like seventy-six times thirty-one, save the 76 times one, then three times six is 8 carry the one, then 3 times 7 plus one is 22 for 228 times 10 plus seventy-six, the six falls in there, eight plus seven is fifteen, carry the one so 22 plus 1 gives you 2356. 82 times 96, six times 2 is twelve carry the one add to 18 to get 192...

She must have been muttering out loud because Applejack asked her in a casual tone over the wheel, “Whatcha doing there, sis?”

“Ah’m multiplyin’” Apple Bloom said, a squeak of fear in her throat when she added, “Ah w-wanna see how hlong before I cain’ do that no more.”

“Whattya mean?” Applejack said uncomfortably, keeping her eyes on the road.

Apple Bloom chewed on her finger... she still had those at least, even if they were looking a little... weird. She looked at Applejack again, then back forward. Apple Bloom wasn’t sure how to say it, so, she just said it. “Applejack, horses cain’t multiply.”

Applejack didn’t answer her, just driving along silently, so Apple Bloom went back to mumbling out her impromptu multiplication problems, but as soon as she did Applejack twisted the wheel pulling the truck onto the side of the road. As they rolled to a halt, Applejack leaned on the wheel burying her face in her arms so all you could see of her was her hat. She was... you could tell she was trying to hide it. Trying to be brave for Apple Bloom. But in that crowded little cab there was no way to hide it, the shaking shoulders, the gasping breaths and the... the... the sounds Apple Bloom never wanted to hear Applejack making.

“Applejack, it’s okay!” Apple Bloom said putting a comforting if uncertain hand on her sister’s side. “Ah’m sorry ah didn’t–”

“No it ain’t!” Applejack shouted, her voice breaking as she did. She lifted her head to look at Apple Bloom with tears running down her cheeks. “It ain’t fair!” she repeated, “You don’t deserve this! It should never have happened to you. Not... not you...”

Granny Smith was just sagging forward, sort of paralyzed with grief, and she couldn’t reach Applejack anyway, so Apple Bloom took her sister into as tender a hug as she could manage. She didn’t even realize how desperately she wanted a hug herself, until Applejack hugged her back, pulling against the seatbelt restraints to do so. Apple Bloom felt emotions welling up in her that she didn’t want to feel but... damnit it wasn’t fair. Her sister was just hissing out, “Consarnit,” over and over again, her voice tense with rage and sorrow. Apple Bloom hated seeing her sister like this, but... but how much longer would Apple Bloom even be able to care? She didn’t want to forget Applejack, or her friends, or even her dumb old school.

“Ah don’t wanna forget mah self,” she mumbled, quivering into Applejack’s breast. Applejack was stroking her now, her hand feeling so much larger on Apple Bloom’s back. Apple Bloom wondered if her sister could feel the fur back there. Apple Bloom didn’t know how much of her own back was covered in fur yet, but the hospital gown she appropriated tied in the back so anyone stroking there would be able to feel it, if she had it. If Applejack felt it though, she gave no sign, not even speaking anymore, just breathing slowly and holding her tight.

“Want me to drive?” asked Granny after a time. That snapped Applejack out of it, and she released Apple Bloom looking over at Granny.

“Ah know ah should be practicin’ mah driving, Granny,” Applejack said with weary eyes, “But ah– yeah, ah don’t really feel up to it, if you don’t mind.”

They were soon driving down the road, with Granny at the wheel this time. The farm house approached, presently. The light in the truck grew alternatingly bright and dim as they passed under the shadows of trees long in the late afternoon sun, pulling up to the flattened dirt of their driveway, really nothing more than a break in the trees that didn’t obstruct the roadway. Applejack and Granny piled out of the cab on either side, and Apple Bloom made to follow Applejack out the passenger side, letting her legs down on the step to the ground. Applejack reached out to help her down, but Apple Bloom shook her head and said, “No, ah got this.”

Apple Bloom jumped down lightly to the earth and then as soon as her feet touched down she fell face forward into the dirt.

“Ah’m okay!” she shouted, getting up on her knees. Then she sat up on her feet, but it just wasn’t working that way. They were so darned long and squat now she felt like she was waddling like a duck. So she just stood up on her toes, wobbled a bit, then gave Applejack the thumbs up. No she didn’t fall into the dirt again after that. She did wince at the gritty dirt against her bare foot though. She was missing shoes already.

Apple Bloom couldn’t get to the farm house fast enough, the smooth wood floors so much nicer to walk on than dirt. Applejack and Granny came up behind as Apple Bloom was kicking the dirt off her uh... toes.

“...’s kinda weird,” she said with an apologetic smile. They gave her a look but didn’t say anything. She followed Applejack and Granny into the house then, though she stopped short in the doorway, looking with worry at the door knob of the open door. It was ...at her eye level. Firming her lip, Apple Bloom strode inside, pretending she didn’t see that just now.

The art portraits on the walls in the living room really gave the place a homey look. There was a old dumpy soft brown chair and a fuzzy couch for relaxing on in front of the television, though Apple Bloom herself preferred just to sit by the fireplace in the evenings. Seemed like Big Macintosh had already got dinner started. There was a pleasant smell drifting from the kitchen, the sounds of sizzling, and clanking of pots and plates. It was clear as she stood before them in the entryway that Granny and Applejack didn’t know what to do with her, what how they were looking at her awkwardly and not saying anything. So Apple Bloom tried to break the tension, smiling hospitably and exclaiming,

“Oh man that suh-mells great! I wonder what’s for dinner?”

She... didn’t really know what to make of their reactions at first. Both Granny and Applejack smiled in relief then frowned in horror, then smiled in relief, then frowned in horror, almost in synch with each other.

“Big Mac!!” Applejack hollered pounding off into the kitchen without even taking her boots off, “What the hell are you cooking?!”

Granny looked after Applejack as she ran off like a whirling dervish, then looked at Apple Bloom and gave a very broad open eyed smile, which was pretty much as fake a smile as Granny had ever pulled off.

“So! Uh...” Granny said uncomfortably, “Smells good, eh?”

Apple Bloom nodded hesitantly, and then her own eyes widened as she realized just what she was smelling. “What?!” she exclaimed in complete abject flabbergast. “T-that don’th make no sense! It cain’t be– ah mean,” she stuck her hands in her mouth, but that big gap between her front and back teeth was still there. “Ah ain’ ot uh eef!” she protested.

“You know,” Granny mused almost to herself, “Winona likes to come around sometimes when we have an outdoor barbecue an’ try to stick her nose into affairs. We don’t give ‘er any o’course, but heh... well ah guess um... good news, then?”

Apple Bloom lay her cheek on her fist moodily. “Ah guess it thechnically ain’t cannibalithm as it’h a cow and all,” she speculated.

“I better go stop Applejack from harming yer brother,” Granny answered, turning and lumbering over to the kitchen, leaving Apple Bloom by herself in the living room. Apple Bloom looked around the room on her own, wondering if she should sit somewhere. Normally she’d be helping set the table or something but... she wasn’t sure if she should do anything like this. The table was just too darn tall. In fact, for all that the room looked familiar to her, it was old memories coming to her not new ones, the kind of memories when you were so young they didn’t even seem real. She remembered that chair as being a lot less threadbare, as it was the last time she had to jump to sit on it. She didn’t sit on Mac’s favorite chair though, just walked around looking at how much bigger everything had gotten.

Her eyes fell on a mirror hanging up on the wall beside the white lace curtained window. You could see through the window that it was getting dark outside already. The days were getting shorter on the ways through Fall after the first year of her new school had started. But the mirror was what caught Apple Bloom’s attention. She hadn’t gotten to see herself before she left the doctor’s office... hadn’t really wanted to see herself. But if there was no escaping this, it wouldn’t do any harm in looking at how... she’d gotten. She sure felt different. The biggest difference, her height, unfortunately made that mirror on the wall entirely out of reach. Apple Bloom knew there was a full length mirror mounted on the inside of the bathroom door though, so maybe she could just take a look there.

Apprehension swelled in her when Apple Bloom walked to the bathroom. That she was balanced on her toes without even any shoes was hard to ignore, now that she was paying attention to her... self. The way the hospital gown played across her skin all fuzzily, literally, fuzzily. She hadn’t even checked to see if any part of her wasn’t covered in fur yet. But it was stupid to be scared of a little looksee. It wouldn’t change anything to hide from it, and then she’d just keep changing without even knowing what was happening. And that really was terrifying. So Apple Bloom determinedly swung the bathroom door open. It opened smoothly, allowing her to see herself in the mirror, and what she saw...

The hospital gown was filthy from where she’d fallen in the dirt on it. It draped limply over a girl with a big pink bow in her bright red hair... who looked like a horse. The resemblance was unmistakable now. The animated ears on top of her head. The way her hair attached down around her neck past her skull. Her neck was thicker and longer too, and more muscular. And her nose had... her face had started to push forward into something resembling the beginnings of a muzzle.

How had she not noticed that? She put a hand on her face, feeling the way it curved just slightly outward, the firmness of her sinus cavity a lot longer and broader than it used to be. She could feel the soft warm fur all over it. Well, almost all. There was still some mottling, but it was more fur than bare skin now. She wondered if this was what men felt like when they had hair on their faces. Her face had changed so much, it was no wonder her voice had gotten thinner and a bit more high pitched. Apple Bloom looked like she thought a little kid would look like, if they were a weird horse with gigantic eyes.

She turned around to look at her tail, which waved up as she did so, making her wobble in place. It was long and bushy, and somehow the bright red hair engulfing it had the same sort of shape as the locks on her head. She fiddled with it and, it felt funny to fiddle with it but still somehow weirdly natural. It was natural for her now, being a horse and all, or something. And looking at her tail gave Apple Bloom a reluctant gander at her own legs again.

She turned around lifting up her gown, and... well, at least it wasn’t any creepier than the last time. Her middle toe had gotten dramatically larger and flatter, to the point it was holding all her weight and the rest of the toes just sat there diminutively. With a hand on the mirror she lifted a foot, and she could only wiggle the middle one. The others just felt numb. She looked at her hands in comparison, and they hadn’t changed as much. The middle finger was a lot longer and wider, but she could still move all her fingers. It looked kind of unsettlingly alien when she did though, so she stopped and looked away from it, looking at herself in the mirror again. Her hair could use a brushing she noted idly. She should probably brush her tail too, while she still can.

“Apple Bloom, I...” Apple Bloom heard her sister say approaching from behind, pausing when she saw Apple Bloom gazing morosely at herself in the mirror. “I’m sorry,” Applejack continued, “Ah thought you’d have a bad reaction to the meat, and you obviously didn’t but ah just sorta panicked you know.”

“It’h okay sis,” Apple Bloom assured her, tearing herself away from the mirror. “Ah wasn’t even thinkin’ abouth it either. Plus ah mean it’h not like ah need to be worried. Ah can always pull thingth around, or you c-can ride on me or something.” She tried to keep her tone reassuring, but Apple Bloom just felt so humiliated. She wanted to be making something of herself, not just being used to herd cows around the fields until her bones gave out. “...so, so ah won’t be served for dinner!” she tried to finish jokingly. Nobody was laughing though, least of all herself.

“Well, you wanna uh, try and eat something?” Applejack said standing above Apple Bloom jauntily. “How’s your appetite?”

“Good,” said Apple Bloom. “Ah mean it smells good, so ah could s’try, just a little bit maybe... maybe ah’m not done so I can shtill eat it?”

“Well come on then, we got a place set for you.”

Apple Bloom couldn’t believe it. They dragged out the booster seat.

“This is so humiliatin’” she said at the polished wood round table in their dining room, grumpily seated in a brightly colored plastic chair on top of the chair. On that table obscuring the apple print tablecloth was a steaming bowl of cheesy mashed potatoes and a big plate full of broccoli, three ears of buttered corn, a bowl of fresh sourdough rolls, and a bowl of chilly vanilla pudding for dessert. Big Mac carried out the main course, grilled sirloin thinly sliced. And it all smelled just amazing.

“Sorry,” he said quietly sitting down at the table. “Thought you was a cat last ah heard.”

“Doc said I had to try a lil’ bit of heverything,” Apple Bloom said failing to conceal her eagerness, “So ah’ll just take just a lil’ bit and see how ith goes.” And boy did it go. The mashed potatoes were like a taste explosion, and the sourdough roll was buttery and crisp, and the corn was sweet as sugar, and the broccoli was ...broccolicious..., and the meat was smoky and savory and... really freaking hard to chew. She found herself cutting tiny slivers off of it, but enjoying in regardless of her stupid teeth.

“Any good?” Big Mac asked.

Apple Bloom nodded with an ecstatic expression on her face, saying around a corn cob, “Everythin’ tastes so rich! This corn is like candy!”

All this food was really rich, in fact. Apple Bloom barely got anything in her stomach, even accounting for all the shrinking, and she was already feeling overwhelmed just by the taste of it all. If this is how horses tasted stuff, then she was all for it. Only problem is it was too rich, and her stomach started feeling like she’d done nothing but eat deep fried butter on a stick. She didn’t even know how to explain it to her family, because the food tasted better so why couldn’t she stand to eat any more of it?

She had to just stop halfway through a roll, saying, “Ah think that’s good...” Even though she didn’t feel satisfied, she just couldn’t imagine taking another bite. Drinking water didn’t seem to help dilute it, and it was just sitting heavy in her stomach. She barely ate enough to touch her plate, half a roll a few bites of corn, a few slivers of meat, a head of broccoli. She wanted more but she needed something to take away the impact of it.

“How’s your stomach feeling?” Applejack asked cautiously, having more than made her share of the food disappear.

“Ah don’t know...” Apple Bloom said looking down at her–she was going to have to ditch this ugly hospital gown sometime. Maybe her old clothes in the attic would fit. But she looked down trying to explain it. “Everythin’ tastes better but it’s too much. It’s too rich. If only there was something ta spread it out, ah dunno.”

“Well,” Applejack speculated, “I usually use bread and veggies when mah stomach’s fulla sloppy rich food.”

Apple Bloom shook her head, “The broccoli’s too strong, and the bread has way too much butter in it.”

“But you didn’t butter your bread!”

“Ah know!” Apple Bloom said, ears going down, “But that’s just what ah tasted. It’s weird...”

“Weaker than broccoli, less buttery than bread, hmm,” Granny mumbled loud enough to be heard.

“Hey,” Big Mac called to Apple Bloom.

“What?” she asked him curiously.

“Hey,” he repeated looking at her expectantly. Her ears went up and she tilted her head.

“What?” she asked again.

“Ah said hey!” he repeated in a frustrated tone.

“Yeah you did,” Apple Bloom said back to him, “So what’s goin’ on?”

Big Mac put his rather large hand palm first over his face and drew it down to his chin. “No, hay,” he emphasized.

Apple Bloom squinted, then blinked, then hurriedly stared with narrowed pupils at something else other than Big Mac, way across the room, that was a very important thing to stare at and not part of this conversation at all and she had to absolutely pay attention to it. “Ohh, hay” she said quietly. That wall clock was a few minutes off, Apple Bloom couldn’t help but notice.

“We could er... we gotta figure out eventually... give it a shot mebbe?” came Granny’s voice sounding as uncomfortable with the idea as Apple Bloom felt.

Couldn’t argue with that reasoning. “A-ah guess,” Apple Bloom said reluctantly, “I-it’s probably that. Ah mean it’s... it’s only natural.”

“Ain’t nothing about any of this that’s natural,” Applejack muttered sourly.

Big Mac stood up and left for a while. You could hear the door opening and closing as he went outside to go to the barn. When he came back–oh dear lord he put it on a plate. Apple Bloom stared in despair as he silently placed the plate down in front of her. At least he had the courtesy not to say anything about it, but Apple Bloom was looking at a plate full of grass. Dead grass, mostly dried out. This wasn’t food it was... it was stuffing for scarecrows and something to make hats out of. She took her fork and looked at the plate, then put her fork down and looked, then reached and almost touched it, then she pulled her hand back, said hastily, “Ah’m gonna go to bed,” and bailed out.

Apple Bloom shoved her chair back from the table, jumping down from it to the floor. Luckily the table was there, so she could hold onto it... while she could hold onto anything at all, so she didn’t fall over. It was so unfair though. Her legs weren’t even good at walking on anymore, at least not on two of them. She stifled a whimper then hurried off as fast as she could, down the hall and up the stairs. She didn’t fall down... much.

In her absence, Applejack finally got around to making an important phone call.

Any hope of her life ever being normal again finally evaporated, as Apple Bloom reached her bedroom. Apple Bloom had been in this room so many times, she knew it like the back of her ...hand, and it just didn’t look right with everything all looming over her. Looming might have been a bit of an exaggeration but she was not comfortable with having to stand on tiptoes to see on top of her dresser. Even if she was standing on tiptoes all the time now.

She looked down at herself in disgust, then went to pull open her closet door, rooting around in it for something she could wear besides this awful hospital gown. She ended up pulling out a simple white nightgown, gratefully sliding out of the hospital gown and slipping the nicer one over her head. Apple Bloom usually just wore underwear for sleeping, but that wouldn’t exactly work the way she was now. Not now and... not later. Even with this nightgown it was puddling around her feet and she had to roll up the sleeves.

Horses don’t care about being naked, it occurred to her. Apple Bloom didn’t really like the idea that she wouldn’t be able to care about how she looked anymore. She’d never been real focused on looks, but... that empty look in Winona’s eyes when she couldn’t give a buck about what she had done and rolled in. She loved Winona, but Apple Bloom never wanted to have that look in her own eyes.

Apple Bloom sighed, pulling open her dresser drawer next. She rifled around past some unopened workbooks, and found her old summer reading assignment. Man that had been one crazy summer. She almost didn’t finish her assignment in time to turn it in. She got a bad grade on it though despite turning it in, for the grammar of course. Stupid English class.

Scootaloo hadn’t even finished hers, but after Apple Bloom heard about the book Scootaloo had picked she couldn’t blame her. The cover said it was about someone playing a fancy computer game to save the world, but the meat of it was some slob dodging assassination attempts so he could screw up everyone’s lives and get the girl. Apple Bloom couldn’t get past the first chapter when it was revealed that the protagonist was literally trailer trash. She hated how people misrepresented down to home folk as if they were some kind of disease.

Apple Bloom wasn’t sure how Sweetie’s report went. She had thought Sweetie Belle picked something about pretty songs and love triangles, but Sweetie refused to say one word about anything after she read it.

Thankfully Apple Bloom hadn’t picked a novel that was that bad, so she had in her hands something she had planned on reading anyway, and had read thanks to that assignment. The Wonderful Wizard of Oz was a great movie and it turned out the book was even better! Well, at least it had lots of weirder things in it, and you could imagine Dorothy as whoever you wanted, even some nobody farm girl down in Canterlot. Apple Bloom smiled with familiarity as she opened it, the page falling open to show the Cowardly Lion. She wished Baum’d written more; he had such a talent for character and sass.

She threw the book up on her bed and climbed on the bed herself, laying down on top of the blankets on her belly, and flipping the pages to the beginning. Apple Bloom was pleased to find she wasn’t having any trouble reading it. She sounded out the words carefully to herself at first, but even with her being all like this physically, nothing she could find mentally had been lost. Yet.

She always envied Dorothy for going to that strange fantastical world, though Apple Bloom definitely didn’t envy Dorothy’s home life. If Dorothy had had a family like Apple Bloom’s then Apple Bloom could understand why Dorothy wanted to get back to it so much, but what happened at the end, when Dorothy went back to a sorry situation, only to have it miraculously repaired for plot purposes, that never sat well with Apple Bloom. Great beginning, confusing middle, mediocre ending. The beginning of the book wasn’t just good for its own merit, though.

It reminded Apple Bloom smugly of the time Applejack’s friend Pinkie Pie tried to tell them all about why she was a fashionist...ish major, about how her life on the farm with her aunt and uncle was all dull and grey and nobody ever laughed, and everyone only worked all the time. Apple Bloom was all, “No Pinkie, that’s the Wizard of Oz.” Pinkie Pie had just blushed beet red right on the spot, mumbled something about a correspondence course and stomped off without another word. So now whenever she wanted to get a rise out of her, Apple Bloom just had to ask Pinkie, “So, how’s Auntie Em, lately?”

Just around the time the Wicked Witch of the East got smushed, Big Mac cracked open Apple Bloom’s door and said, “Hey, y’alright?”

“Yeah so far at any rate,” Apple Bloom called out. “Y’can come in ah’m decent.”

Mac walked in with a pleasant if a bit forced smile on his boyish face. “Whatcha up to?” he asked.

“Ah was readin’ this old book from last summer,” Apple Bloom explained, “Ah know it’s silly but maybe if ah keep on readin’ I feel like ah ...won’t forget how.”

“No clue,” he said sitting next to her on the edge of her bed. “Any trouble?”

Apple Bloom shook her head. “Maybe ah’m just not noticin’ but it’s all in there far as I can see. In the book, that is. All the witches and Dorothy and all.”

Mac nodded. She looked at him uncertainly. “Granny’s starting a fire,” he said casually. “You wanna come down?”

“A-ah don’t...” she mumbled insecurely, “Ah don’t wanna make y’all feel unsettled or nothing...”

“If it’s read out loud, we can tell you if you’re doin’ it right,” he responded practically, adding then with some heavy emotion in his voice, “We all wanna spend time with you...”

He didn’t vocalize it, but Apple Bloom could hear the proclamation of “...in your last moments,” hanging over them both like a reaper’s scythe. She faked up a smile and said, “That’d be right nice, Big Mac.”

She stumbled on the way out the hall, leaning onto her brother suddenly for support. Apple Bloom had almost gone... on her hands and knees for a minute there, except she wouldn’t need to use her knees anymore. She didn’t want to fall down like that, because she was afraid that she wouldn’t ever get up if she did. They made it downstairs without incident though, and Granny was there, bent over sticking the poker into a crackling fire in the fireplace.

“Where’s Applejack?” Apple Bloom asked curiously.

“Milking,” Big Mac said.

“She didn’t do that during the day?” Apple Bloom wondered.

“In the woods,” was his explanation.

“She was even putting aside her chores to root around in the woods for me...” Apple Bloom said gratefully but also guiltily, “Just based on some dream clearing that ah don’t even know exists.” He nodded silently.

Applejack burst in the door then, shouting, “Okay! All done!” The events of the past fifteen minutes would have gone down in the annals of cow history, if cows kept history, and cows would have spoken of it in hushed whispers from then on, if cows spoke, or whispered. Suffice to say, she rushed things a bit. “Ap–” Applejack said, then drew up short at the sight of Apple Bloom, standing there in a droopy white nightgown, barely half of Big Mac’s height.

“How you doin’, Apple Bloom?” Applejack asked, in too small and nervous a voice for the farm girl Apple Bloom knew and loved.

“Ah’m sthill me,” Apple Bloom said easily if squeakily. That made Applejack sag with relief. Apple Bloom held up the too large book in front of her saying, “Ah’m gonna practith reading this in front of the fire.”

“Well get on over,” Granny said, wielding a large blanket half draped around herself. So they all did. Apple Bloom ended up wedged in between Granny and Applejack and one of each end of the book rested against each of their knees respectively. She read out loud and didn’t miss a single word, nobody corrected her at least. Though her stupid teeth—or sthupid theeth as she would have put it—kept making her bungle up words, turning her d’s into r’s and such like that. Not just the missing teeth but her mouth felt bigger, like she had to move her tongue more to get to the end of it. Not a whole lot, but just enough to make you miss a ‘t’ every now and again.

The Munchkins and the Field Mice, and the Emerald City passed by, as the fire in front of the four Apples popped and crackled, slowly dying down. Apple Bloom found herself drifting away from the story mentally, too troubled about her own situation. She’d always wanted to be like Dorothy, just a normal farm girl going to a fantastical land, but what was happening to Apple Bloom was like the diametric opposite of that. Everything was completely blessedly boringly normal, except for her. It was like someone took her fantasy and sent her in the exact opposite direction of what she wanted.

Near the end, Apple Bloom found herself fighting to stay awake. The fire was so cozy and she was surrounded by the warm embrace of her loved ones. She would have enjoyed drifting off like this any other time. But here and now, Apple Bloom didn’t want to fall asleep. She wasn’t sure if she would ever wake up again. If she let her bleary eyes close, then something else would open them, and all they’d find in the morning is a dumb animal in her place.

She was fumbling with the pages. Her fingers, well except the middle one, had become weak and unresponsive. It was a bleak reminder of how horses didn’t need fingers, because they didn’t read, or do math, or hold things, or achieve. When the book was over, Apple Bloom didn’t let it close. She looked around the room for something else to read, anything to distract her from what she didn’t want to face. But all she saw is how Big Mac had already drifted off to sleep, and Granny looked like she was nodding on her way. And that made it ten times harder to stay awake.

“Ah don’t want this...” she said, her voice warbling in fright.

“Oh hon, it’s okay,” Applejack cooed to her softly.

“No it ain’t,” Apple Bloom said with a tightness in her throat.

Applejack just curled her arms around Apple Bloom, holding the half-girl to her chest saying, “It’ll be okay, Apple Bloom. We’ll figure something out.”

“I’m scared, Applejack,” Apple Bloom whimpered, clinging to her sister as best as she could. Her emotions felt more unstoppable and tidal than she could ever remember them being. She was actually having to gulp back sobs... it was right to be upset at this. Why did it feel so weird to be upset, then? Was even that changing? Could horses feel grief?

Apple Bloom sighed, struggling with herself as much as with her situation. “Will you promise to take care of me, when it... happens?” she asked tearfully, carefully controlling her voice.

“Ah promise,” Applejack whispered intensely, “Ah promise it’ll be okay, even if you... you lose yourself for a little we will find a way to bring you back.”

Apple Bloom couldn’t answer her, because Apple Bloom didn’t think she could talk without crying anymore, so she just whimpered miserably and pressed herself tight against Applejack’s deceptively soft warmth. Apple Bloom hadn’t cried herself to sleep in... a long, long time, but this night she was crying hot tears one moment, and forgetting herself in the next. Sleep claimed her like a dark vortex, and there were only dreams from then on.

Author's Note

The End.
*gets hogtied strung up and beaten with sticks by the entire Apple family, no the entire Apple family*

Maybe... not the end... medic..

Morning Revelations

They say parallel universes are impossibly distant, but suppose there were a parallel universe nearly identical to our own, except that your own parents, your physical makeup, and your circumstances were switched with that of a friend you know. In this other universe, you grew up in a different environment, with different experiences and values, the same experiences of your friend.

Suppose you built a colossal device capable of bridging the gap between these two universes, and you spoke with your counterpart in that other universe, about your differing experiences, opinions and beliefs. Would that be any different an experience than just picking up a telephone, and calling the friend you already know? Is their own personal experience in any way distinguishable from a parallel universe, in which you are them and they are you? Can you tell the difference between travelling to another universe, to meet your counterpart there, and simply... walking down the block, and across the street?

It might be safe to speculate that parallel universes are closer than we think.

“Hello?”

“Hey. How ya doin’?”

The girl talking into her phone brushed a lock of hair away staring dully at the stupid chalkboard full of stupid facts that she already knew ten times over, saying, “Oh, hey Applejack. Good as I usually do, I suppose.” She didn’t even care that Applejack was interrupting her in the middle of class. Her new friend’s rude interruption was a blessed novelty in this sea of inane repetition and rote.

“Ah was wonderin’ if you know the number of the school’s librarian, you know Ms. Cheerilee,” Applejack asked.

She rolled her eyes at that, saying snarkily into the phone, “Oh, so because I’m the book-worm, means I automatically know the librarian on a personal basis?”

Applejack was unphased. “You do know though, do ya?”

A tired anger flashed across her face before she said, “Sure, hold on I’ll text it to you.”

“So, why are you calling the librarian?” she asked afterwards.

“It’s uh... personal family matter,” Applejack said enigmatically.

A puzzled frown crossed her face as she said, “Well, okay then. Uh, good luck with that I guess?”

“Thanks... call ya later maybe.”

She stared at her phone thoughtfully.

“You know there is a rule about phones in class,” her teacher muttered, inches away from her ear.

The situation took a turn for the downright strange, when after class, Applejack delivered another unexpected phone call.

“Sorry to bother you again, but the librarian thought ah was prankin’ her! Could you maybe ah dunno, do your thing with her and get her to call me, so she knows who she’s talkin’ to?”

The girl gave the phone an odd look before bringing it to the side of her face, saying, “Why did the librarian think you were pranking her?”

“Y’know, this was a bad idea, sorry to bother ya, talk to you later maybe!” Applejack belted out nervously and quickly. Then there was a click as Applejack hung up.

That was definitely what she would call strange, but it wasn’t until later in the afternoon that things started to get really peculiar. Applejack called her again out of nowhere, this time when she was relaxing in a cheap Indian place where she could actually get some halfway decent vegetarian food. It wasn’t that she was squeamish about killing animals, not anymore certainly. But she never could get used to actually eating their flesh. It just wouldn’t settle right in her gut.

“Hey, uh... you know a lot about like, spooky myths and stuff right?” Applejack had said right off the bat. She sounded uncharacteristically weary, worn out and uncertain of herself. It was hard to hear over the phone, and with these little ears, but it was clear something was bothering the farm girl.

“You know I’ve studied folklore,” she answered noncomittally, sipping at a tasty mango smoothie that was supposedly foreign around here. Never did any good to answer that question truthfully when Applejack asked it, because as far as anyone here knew, myths weren’t real, and what she was really an expert on was nothing more than fiction. Never did any good to answer truthfully, because here she didn’t have a horn, and here she was about as magical as a rock. And that’s not even a farmed rock.

“Well have you ever heard of a uh...” Applejack offered hesitantly, “Golden apple?”

Welp. It looked like the girl was going to find out if a mango lassi flavored chickpea masala tasted any good. She put down what was left of her drink, spluttering and grabbing a napkin to wipe her mouth with. Then she brought the phone to her ear again. “It sounds vaguely familiar,” she said in a disinterested tone. “I think it’s a somewhat less well known Greek myth. You should read about it. It’s very fascinating.”

“Yeah, maybe... later...” Applejack’s voice said in a distracted tone. The girl tried to resist rolling her eyes at her stubbornly ignorant friend. Just because you were a farmhand didn’t mean you had to avoid learning anything. At least that Apple Bloom girl seemed to understand this.

There was only one thing Applejack was interested in, and that was cows. Still, the girl also tried to resist rolling her eyes, because she was honestly intrigued at this point. This was starting to seem like something that hadn’t happened before. There was no way that particular myth could be just a coincidence. Had she forgot again, and mentioned the myth to Applejack earlier?

“Why are you asking about a golden apple?” she said curiously over the phone.

“Well it’s ...sort of a... private family... matter,” Applejack said sounding unconvinced of that herself.

“Oh, don’t be so closed shop,” she said with a jesting quality to her voice, “You know you can trust me. What has been bothering you about the idea of a golden apple? It’s not like you’ve been oh say, dreaming about one or anything, right?”

“Actually this ain’t concernin’ me so much as Apple Bloom...” Applejack said trailing off in a fatigued tone.

Her? But that girl wasn’t even... though it would be strangely appropriate, if so. “Those three?” she laughed, “What kind of trouble have they gotten into this time?”

“No, just...” Applejack hissed a sigh of frustration over the phone, “Look you wouldn’t believe me if ah told you, but she went and told the whole town about it practically, so just check out the evening news tonight.”

Wow, they made the news? That sounded more like a disaster than a peculiar dream. The news wouldn’t report if something hadn’t gone wrong, would it? “Alright, Applejack,” she said, “But what—”

“Ah gotta go,” Applejack said shortly, “The cows are makin’ noise again and ah been puttin’ off milkin’ em too long.”

“Fair enough, but—” Applejack had hung up. The girl stared at the phone, confounded.

She got to that cheap motel she was staying at today, in short order. Hurrying in, she didn’t even pause to throw down her coat before flouncing on the bed and turning on the squawk box. The news wasn’t on yet; it was just that show about adopting animals as pets or something, so she just sat there staring past the television waiting for the news to come on. She’d seen that episode already, anyway.

When the news program finally started, worryingly, it was at the hospital. She really hoped those three weren’t in traction, this time. The golden apple shouldn’t have caused that, even if it was finally showing its face around here. There was a reporter there, in front of what looked like a smaller doctor’s clinic, with the larger hospital further in the background. Standing alongside the reporter was a short little...

“This is Channel 7 news reporting at the local hospital where a fantasy scenario seems to have come to life...

The girl stared blankly at at the scene unfolding in the television before her, then violently smacked the book out of the hands of the other girl lying next to her on the bed, the one of them who wasn’t even paying attention to the news, or any external stimulation for that matter.

With her nose out of the book, the other girl said irritably, “What was that for, Sunset?!” but then Sunset Shimmer unceremoniously pulled the purple girl’s chin around to face the television together with her, saying,

“Twilight, we have a problem.”

Applejack woke up a little horse. When the morning dawned, it was revealed that Granny and Big Mac had squirmed away in the night, but Applejack had fallen dead asleep on the floor there, with Apple Bloom passed out on top of her. Applejack carefully lifted the blanket, which the others had kindy laid over both of them proper, and was met with a surreal sight. It was surreal because... it still looked like Apple Bloom. Same colors as her, even the mane was just like her hair, if a bit shorter. She even had forgotten to take out her bow, which looked huge in contrast to her now.

But at the same time, Applejack was looking at a little horse on her chest, sleeping soundly on her side. The tiniest horse you would ever have imagined, outside of a doll maybe. She couldn’t have been much larger than a cat, not counting her head. The nightgown tangled up and draped around Apple Bloom, but her limbs were curled forward like a horse’s and her face was dominated by a rounded muzzle. She still had a large brow, but there was just no trace of humanity left. Even her unconscious breathing was horselike, more of a whinny than a sigh.

Applejack laid the blanket back and gently stroked along Apple Bloom’s barrellike side. It didn’t feel right to do so, but it didn’t feel wrong, and she knew better than to awaken a horse quickly. Applejack shifted underneath uncomfortably, her butt sore from lying on wood all night, with nothing but a pillow to rest her head against. There was nothing to be done about that though. And this was probably the closest a horse had ever allowed Applejack to be to her, so it might be the last chance Applejack had to be this close to Apple Bloom for... a while.

Applejack did have to wake her up though, as she couldn’t just lay around being Apple Bloom’s mattress all day. The old trick of scratching behind a horse’s ear seemed to do it. The little horse gave a noise almost like a murmuring grumble and lifted its head off of Applejack’s chest. Its eyes were possibly even more vivid and full than Apple Bloom’s had been, when it opened them, looking at Applejack with a sleepy expression full of confusion.

“Applejack...?” the little horse said.

Apple Bloom woke up, a little horse. Someone’s hand was scratching pleasantly behind her ear. Apple Bloom noticed with concern that she wasn’t in her bed for some reason. It felt like she was lying against someone, but someone big. She lifted her head, readying to sit up, but then her head just kept lifting from that point, and Apple Bloom knew there was something seriously wrong then. Apple Bloom didn’t even have to twitch her upper body before she could face, and focus on what she was lying against. A warm giant’s chest, a giantess who bore a very familiar face.

“Applejack...?” she said confusedly.

Applejack gave an inarticulate “Wlueuh!” and lunged backwards, her eyes bugging out, dumping Apple Bloom unceremoniously off her chest onto the wooden floor.

“Ow! Ugh...” Apple Bloom’s elbow hit the floorboards when she fell. She could still lift her head, but she couldn’t figure out how to raise herself up. She couldn’t move right! Her legs wouldn’t move right. Her arms felt like, stuck at the elbows. What was goin’ on? Worse still she was all tangled up in a mess of blanket and a white nightgown that she hadn’t worn in...

Apple Bloom stared down at that nightgown, at herself underneath it, stared at something she’d seen once before, but not while she was awake. Her arms were curled in front of her, buried in the folds of fabric. It felt natural the way they were, but it didn’t look that way. Her wrists were turning down she could feel, as if she would be pointing at her own feet.

She extended the upper arm that wasn’t braced under her, dumbfoundedly wiggling it in the air, the fabric that covered it shaking as she did so. Apple Bloom craned her neck around to look at Applejack again, finding herself rolling automatically to her belly as she did so. Applejack had a petrified look on her face, mouth agape, fallen back on her butt, and leaning on one hand, the other outstretched towards Apple Bloom but unmoving.

“Thath washn’t a dhream, wasz it,” Apple Bloom said in a disjointed daze.

“Apple Bloom!” Applejack exclaimed loudly making Apple Bloom’s ears twitch with a wince. “Apple Bloom,” she said more quietly, “You’re talking!”

“Ah gueth I am...?” Apple Bloom said, beyond belief.

“Are you finished yet?” Applejack asked nervously, “How are you talking? Are you still you?”

“Ah sthink sho, yeah,” Apple Bloom said hesitantly, growing more excited as she said, “Ah sthink I am! And ah’m— mah moushth ish awrl lorng, sorry,” she said smacking her lips to familiarize herself with them. Even that felt different though. She crossed her eyes at the blunt muzzle hiding at the edge of her vision. How did Granny say to do it again? Pull your tongue out more? What did you do when your tongue was thicker though? “Shh sth sss,” she said experimentally, sticking her tongue out and blowing a raspberry.

“Quick, read this!” Applejack shouted suddenly, sticking the book she’d retrieved in front of Apple Bloom opened to a random page.

“If hyou eveur neezh– need ush agaiiinuh nuh, shorry ish mah moufth.”

“One more time...” Applejack said hopefully.

“If hyou eveur need us again zh– she said, come outh inth–into the fielrd an’ call—”

“Oh Apple Bloom!” Applejack proclaimed joyfully, “You’re still here!”

“Buh for how hlong?” Apple Bloom countered worriedly.

Applejack’s expression froze. “Ah-ah’m just glad y-you made the night,” she struggled out with difficulty, “Apple Bloom, look at ya!”

Apple Bloom looked back at herself lying prone there, and then her eyes widened as she realized she could look at herself. Just with the act of looking to the side, she could almost turn her neck all the way around! The rest of her body, she wasn’t quite so confidently in control of as her neck though. She looked back at Applejack concerned, saying, “How do ah hlook?”

“Just like a little horse,” Applejack answered honestly, “Littler than a pony, littler even than a dwarf horse.”

“Why ith sthe univerthe conthpiring to make me litthle?!” Apple Bloom exclaimed angrily.

Applejack thought a moment, then commented flatly, “Ah honestly do not know how to answer that.”

“Ith okay ah’m juth comphlaining,” Apple Bloom said, ears drooping glumly.

“How do you feel?” Applejack asked hastily, “Can ah get you anything? You need a pillow? Another book? Some breakfast maybe? Brush your hair? Maybe a bath? Need me to—”

“Ah’m fthine,” Apple Bloom interrupted, still sitting there helplessly on the floor. She wasn’t fine of course, but when Applejack got like this she really got like this, so you had to cut it off at the pass. It was just so annoying when her older sister doted on her just because she’s older.

And in this case it would be because her older sister has a normal body. With hands. And wasn’t crippled. And could talk right. Maybe some doting wouldn’t be so bad after all.

“Um...” Apple Bloom shifted hesitantly, but just couldn’t make heads or tails about which way her limbs were supposed to go. Her left arm was feeling a bit numb from lying on it, but that’s all she could get. “Buh ah don’th hknow how to sthand up... can you herlp me?”

Applejack crouched down, then knelt down. Apple Bloom just couldn’t believe how huge her sister was now. Applejack had her huge hands held out but wasn’t moving, a nervous tension in her expression. “Can ah... touch you?” she asked, bewildered.

Apple Bloom wanted to nod but she was on her side and she wasn’t even sure if ...whatever she was, was capable of nodding at all. So she just said, “Pleashe do,” as clearly as she could. Apple Bloom still closed her eyes in uncomfortable fright when Applejack’s arms stretched out and those hands came down around her, untangling the helpless Apple Bloom from her sheets and nightgown.

“Ah’m gonna have to get you out of this,” Applejack said with a fatalistic determination, undoing the buttons on the neck of Apple Bloom’s nightgown. “Sorry, it’s jus’”

“Ah hknow,” Apple Bloom said pleadingly, peeking down at the strange yellow furred animal inside the top of her nightgown, “Jus’ helrp me up!”

Applejack hesitated on how to do it, but her hands gripped underneath Apple Bloom’s wrists easy enough. Apple Bloom’s own “hands” just plainly hooked over her sister’s grasp. Apple Bloom looked up at Applejack as Applejack slid her out of the nightgown entirely. Her sister had such a worried look on her face! At first Apple Bloom was lifted too far, and her feet started to dangle in the air, but then her sister set her two legs down to the wood floor firmly, and slowly.

Apple Bloom found she had to balance up on her toes, with her arms still hooked over Applejack’s hands. Her feet were just so weird now. Hooves now? How do you stand on these things? Applejack then carefully let go of Apple Bloom’s wrists leaving Apple Bloom to balance there by herself. Apple Bloom continued to look up at Applejack, trying not to move a muscle, as it was crazy awkward to balance like this, but inevitably she wobbled and fell forward, and put her arms out to catch herself.

There was a light clop as Apple Bloom felt her arms firmly take on her weight. But... Apple Bloom was still staring up at her big sister. She didn’t have to hunch over. She didn’t feel contorted or strained, or anything. Her neck just bent back that way easily, situating her head comfortably above her horizontal torso. She wasn’t on her knees. She was... Apple Bloom didn’t want to be standing like this, but there she was, easy as pie.

Apple Bloom turned her head down from Applejack’s stunned gaze, and Apple Bloom could see her arms not in front of her, but underneath her. It felt like she was sticking her finger against the wood, but her fingertip firmed and spread slightly when her weight was down on it. There was no question about what was on the end of her hands. And her feet felt the same way.

“Oh Apple Bloom...” Applejack said in a surprisingly loving tone. That bothered Apple Bloom for some reason. Applejack was upset about this, right?

“Ah’m okay, ah can dtheal with sthis,” Apple Bloom insisted. She turned her head around to look at the fallen nightgown behind her and... once again her head just kept on turning. Her arms and legs were still braced, not even twisted at the shoulders, but Apple Bloom could still crane around all the way to look at her own backside. It was like looking down the back of a horse, a kind of weird colored one but, a horse. The cherry red tail erupting from her spine curled merrily in an arc through the air behind her. She could feel the tension in it as it hung there. Her legs, or rather hindquarters, widened slightly at the rear, and her chest was a chubby looking barrel shape.

“Apple Bloom,” Applejack repeated, prompting Apple Bloom to turn to look up at her sister again. “You are so gosh darn adorable!”

“Ah am n—” Apple Bloom started to shout, then blinking asked up in surprise, “...wai’ rearry?”

It looked like Applejack was trying really hard not to bite her lower lip. “Say,” Applejack said excitedly, “You want me to get you a mirror?”

“Ah hknow ah’m a horth,” Apple Bloom said forlornly.

“Yeah, but you should really see yourself!” Applejack insisted, “You look just like... just like you, but horse.”

“Ah guethh,” Apple Bloom said, giving in with a bit of disgust. In her opinion, Applejack was way too happy about her own sister being some dumb looking horse thing. Applejack squatted, then jumped up standing, striding over to the wall where she pulled off the wall mirror by the window.

She carried it back and brought it down, and Apple Bloom actually found herself cringing back when she saw herself swing into view. She didn’t want to see it! But then she stopped short at what she saw. There was a pony in the mirror cringing away from her, with one hoof slightly raised in the air from doing that.

Apple Bloom looked at her own raised hoof and the mirror pony did the same. She hadn’t even noticed she raised the thing. The generally shocked expression on the mirror pony’s face was adamantly clear. It didn’t look anything like Winona’s disinterested and constant horse frown. Apple Bloom’s face was so expressive, it was even kind of silly looking, like exaggerated or something.

Above that cute little muzzle of hers were these big liquid eyes, opened wide as they can go, dominated by the ebony pupils rimmed in a vibrant orange ring. The mirror pony’s hooves weren’t knobby or boney at all, more like smooth cylinders that gave easily as they bent at the joints. The grain of her fur was so fine that it didn’t even shine in the morning sunlight. This pony’s bright red mane was curling around its head, just like Apple Bloom’s hair was supposed to do, except attached from the neck up instead of just on the head, and her triangular pony ears nestled in those bouncy red bangs in a way that looked like they belonged there.

Framing her whole head was Apple Bloom’s favorite pink bow, disarrayed and askew because she forgot to take it off and slept on it. Except... her bow hadn’t shrunk. So saying it framed her head, it literally framed her head. It was giant in comparison. Apple Bloom stared at herself in the mirror and she couldn’t think of what to say. Applejack was right. She was adorable! She was an adorable little pony trussed up in a big pretty pink bow. She looked kind of like a little kid, but maybe that was just how things... like her were supposed to look? What do you even say to the sight of this in the mirror?

After a long pause, Apple Bloom quietly declared, “Mah bow ish crooked.”

She lifted a hoof up to fiddle with it, or at least push it around. When Apple Bloom spoke, Applejack responded by standing up, leaning over the mirror to look down at her, and pulling the mirror away. She hastily leaned the mirror on the wall, turning to Apple Bloom and holding a hesitant hand out saying, “Oh heh, that it is. You want any help with that?”

Apple Bloom ignored her though. She wasn’t really paying attention to anything right now, other than her own arm. When Apple Bloom reached it up to fiddle with the bow it became... just an arm, like any arm she’d had before, but when she brought it down straight, her shoulder sort of... disappeared. It like, went up into her and against her side and... locked into place or something.

“sThis ith weird...” she whimpered nervously, standing on all fours and not moving again.

“We should probably call the doc,” Applejack suggested wanly.

“Yeah...” Apple Bloom agreed quietly.

“You want me ta go wake up the family first?” Applejack asked hopefully.

“Yeah...” Apple Bloom agreed quietly.

“How are ya doin’ for walkin’?” Applejack asked crouching down again going from towering over her to slightly less towering over her. “Can ya move around?”

“Ah ain’ thried,” Apple Bloom said lifting an arm. It came away from the ground easy enough and she felt her tail swaying naturally as she leaned more on the other arm. Putting the arm down she noticed Applejack watching intently. Well, Winona could walk right when she was a baby, so it can’t be that hard can it? Apple Bloom put her left arm forward, and soon as she did her right leg lifted up and went forward too. She wobbled on two opposite limbs, then pulled her left arm back and planted it back down underneath her with a clop, so she could ease her right leg slowly back to where it was before.

She experimented with that a few times, lifted her arm, put it down. Lifted her leg, put it down. Just vertically a few times.

She lifted them both again, and stuck her left arm forward, having to lean forward to plant it further ahead of herself. Her right leg planted underneath her, leaving her in a bit of a contorted position. Leaning forward but not moving her right arm meant that Apple Bloom’s right arm was going to get tucked underneath her, while similarly leaving her left leg stretched out behind her. Before she toppled forward onto her right shoulder, she had to lift her right arm, and stick it out to catch herself, stumbling a few steps before...

“Ah guess you can!” Applejack said positively while Apple Bloom stood there trembling uncertainly, trying to figure out how she did that. “You work on that while ah get the others, an’ then we’ll rustle up some grub.”

Grub sounded really good right now. It brought a genuine smile to Apple Bloom’s face and she looked up at her sister saying, “Thanksh, Applethack,”

Apple Bloom tried again, moving her right arm forward again as her opposite leg took itself a step. That naturally made her left arm off balance so she lifted it forward as her right leg pulled up and planted down, and she paused then, wobbling in place. Oh, so now her right arm was underneath her and off balance just like her left arm had been. She corrected that, and it returned her to a standing position. Then she took another half step forward, and she was in that arm-leaning stretched-leg position thingy.

It was pretty obvious how to walk now. When you correct one arm, the other ends up off balance needing correction, and as long as you keep putting your arms forward to correct that you’ll keep walking forward, and the legs just sort of push from behind while you’re leaning into that. She practiced just lifting her opposite arms and legs in place, without moving them forward, until she felt like she had a sort of rhythm going, and wasn’t wobbling too much when she was balanced only on one arm and one leg.

Then she took a deliberate step forward just like before, and just like before, her opposite arm needed balance correction, so she corrected it moving it forward with her leg. Then she corrected the opposite pair, and so on, awkwardly sort of stretch stepping forward with a heavy clop every time her toes–hooves on two of her feet came down at once. Apple Bloom only stopped when she got to the fireplace mantle, her nail tapping its stone edge with a click before settling down to bear her weight again.

Now all Apple Bloom had to figure was how to turn around.

After a bit of analysis and swivelling around on her hooves, she came to the conclusion that a combination of sheer and rotation could do the trick. Rotation alone wouldn’t turn her entirely around of course, as her hooves couldn’t rotate around on their axes to face backwards, and that wouldn’t have rotated her torso anyway. But what she did was slide her left arm and leg both back at the same time, ending up splay legged from that, but then she rotated so she was facing the angle of the sheer, and it made her hooves line up right nice again. So she stepped back again on one side, and repeated. She was little over half the way around, when Big Macintosh came down the stairs.

He didn’t seem in a huge hurry, but he was watching her closely. “Ah’m shtill me!” she shouted out behind herself across the room, then went back to her determined scissor legging until she could face him directly. And she was still her! She just... couldn’t talk right, and was standing on four legs like it weren’t no thing. But she could still do math, right? She hadn’t tried but, but she could still talk! ...sorta.

What even was she?!

Big Macintosh’s slippers came up to stand before her. His slippers specifically, because those were his most defining features at her level right now. She turned up from those ridiculously fuzzy pink things to look him in the eye. It made Apple Bloom sit down dizzly from a sense of vertigo. He was so darn tall! She looked up at him and he looked down at her, and she wasn’t sure what he was so happy about with that silly smile growing on his face, because she had real things to worry about now!

“D’aww,” he said tenderly.

That made Apple Bloom’s brows knit in alarm and frustration. “Ah’m not hcute!” she protested up at him futilely with an angry huff. Big Macintosh tried, and failed to hold back a snicker. Apple Bloom really wanted to know what twisted god was responsible for this so she could punch him in the face. Or wait, she couldn’t really do that anymore. Kick him in the butt then.

“Ah’ll be in the kitchen,” Big Mac said, turning on his heels and striding over in that direction. When he was gone, Apple Bloom’s shoulders sank and she let out a whimper. She couldn’t talk right, she didn’t even have hands anymore, and worst of all he was right. Apple Bloom was totally adorable! If she’d seen herself like this, she’d have run up and grabbed her, and hugged her so hard her eyes popped out. Apple Bloom was torn between feeling complimented and feeling slighted for how it was belittling (ugh!) her predicament. This whole past day had been just one emotional roller coaster after another, and Apple Bloom just wanted to get off the ride.

“Apple Bloom?” Granny Smith spoke up from the stairwell leading Apple Bloom to lift her gaze from the floorboards again. “Applejack said you were okay...” she explained to Apple Bloom hesitantly, as if Granny didn’t believe it herself. Apple Bloom honestly didn’t blame her for not believing it, but... seeing that momentary hesitation in her grandmother hurt so much more than it should have.

“Yeah ah’m okay,” she said clearly... one of the few sentences she could say clearly. Even before Granny came over to her, Apple Bloom just wanted to run into her arms and get a big hug. She could barely even walk though much less run. She wanted to tell her how terrible it was, but she couldn’t even say “terrible”, and that was terrible! Even her whimpers didn’t sound normal. She wasn’t used to sounding so high and reedy. She guessed it had to be the nature of what... whatever she was changing into was. She didn’t even want to think about how horselike that huff had sounded.

“Are ye all done changin’?” Granny asked settling heavily to the floor beside Apple Bloom in as close to cross legged as she could manage. Apple Bloom stood up... well, lifted her butt, which made her arms slide forward, and that was about as good as she was going to get, as far as standing up was concerned. She felt stable standing like that, but her legs were still trembling for some reason.

“Ah don’ kn–” her voice broke as she said it. “Ah don’ know,” she repeated, ignoring her watery eyes, “Ah jus’ wanna be hdone with—” Apple Bloom had to stop talking again as her breath caught. She tried to compose herself, but it wasn’t working. “Why am ah crying?” she protested angrily. She wanted to lift a hand...arm to wipe away the tears running down her face but she couldn’t even do that because she felt so unsteady she needed all four of them to stand on now.

“Oh Apple Bloom...” Granny said laying a hesitant hand on her back. Apple Bloom knew what she needed but, but she wasn’t a baby so she couldn’t just ask for a... well, she could ask for something else though.

“C-coul’ you lif’ me up jus’ forl a sec?” Apple Bloom asked looking at the ground.

“Well, okay ah guess so,” Granny said, reaching out with both hands around Apple Bloom’s midsection, and lifting Apple Bloom up with some difficulty. As soon as Granny Smith pulled Apple Bloom close to her, Apple Bloom wrapped her arms as far as they would go around Granny’s broad torso and just hugged her hard as she could. Granny stiffened in surprise then relaxed. She smoothly cradled to her bosom the quietly sobbing horse thing that Apple Bloom had become. Apple Bloom didn’t know why she was crying now after all that had already happened, but she couldn’t do a thing about it, and she just desperately needed the soft soothing warmth of her ma— her grandma against her.

That was how Applejack came upon the two of them. Though Apple Bloom’s need to cry had blessedly ceased, she didn’t let go of Granny, afraid of what she’d do if she didn’t have someone to hold onto. “How’s about some breakfast?” Applejack said quietly, making Apple Bloom’s ear turn around to face the cowgirl.

Apple Bloom lifted her head to look at her sister, feeling sort of dull inside. “Htat’d be greath Applezhack,” she said neutrally, tilting her head up at Granny. “Ah sthink ah can shdand up now,”

Granny carefully lowered her to the floor, making sure all four of Apple Bloom’s feet were planted before letting go. “Yer gotta work on yer pronunciation,” she said guidingly, “Y’remember what ah said about esses and tees?”

“Yeah, ith... iths eashy to forge’p rthough,” Apple Bloom regretfully admitted, “An’ mah thounge ith all thick an’ thuff.” She stuck out her tongue to emphasize what she meant and... it just kept on stuck-outing. How long was...?! She pulled her tongue in hurriedly and blushed saying, “...thee?”

“That is one long tongue,” Applejack stated the obvious in a flustered tone.

Granny scratched her head and muttered dazedly, “Ah can’t really say ah know what ter do bout that.”

Apple Bloom wanted to shrug, but her shoulders were kind of stuck right now. She decided she might as well just silently walk to the dining room, then. So she uh, she lifted a hoof and uh... dangit how do you walk again?!

Okay, one hoof, then the back–no the other back one, and yeah that’s right, except no that goes back to standing so you turn it full ways and that... yeah that’s it! Apple Bloom stumbled in place and came to a halt. Looking back at Granny and Applejack bashfully, she faced forward and resumed her slow walk.

...

Well now she really needed to use the booster seat. Apple Bloom couldn’t even see what was on the dining room table, just the table’s dusty underside. She could probably fit underneath it completely without even a squeeze. She tried to sort of rear up like a horse to get her hand-hooves up on the chair, but it was surprisingly unintuitive how to do so, and Apple Bloom just ended up setting roughly back down on her butt again. But this time she regretted it. There was no giant brother towering above her to distract her now. Just Apple Bloom and her butt. Her very unclothed butt. She bit her lip anxiously, squirming in place but afraid to stand up again.

“Need help up?” came her brother’s voice belatedly. Oh now he shows up of course. She turned to look up at him from half underneath the table, sitting there beside her chair with the booster seat, shaking her head a negatory. She couldn’t be sure how much of it even showed underneath the fur, but when she asked him in trepidation, a full blush rushed to her face. “Can ah geth shome... c-can ah getsh some c-clothes maybe?”

His expression was even more unreadable from way down here, but she could certainly see his eyes widen. “...ah’ll get Granny,” he said noncomittally, turning and walking off a bit more hurriedly than a calm, easygoing, unconcerned brother should be.

Maybe Apple Bloom could just scoot around on her butt for the rest of her life.

“Come on Apple Bloom, we’re all family here,” Granny told her comfortingly. “Ain’t nothin’ ah haven’t seen before, heh heh!” Apple Bloom just blushed more at that.

“Please, Apple Bloom, just... put up with it for now?” Applejack pleaded, “We’ll figure out somethin’ but ya caint sit around under the table forever. None of us’ll laugh ah promise. Anyway your tail it—” she stopped uncomfortably, then just went and said, “Your tail covers most of anything up anyways.”

“Ith keepth going up tho,” Apple Bloom said disagreeably. “Juth wathch.” Blushing heavily again she lifted her butt up going back to a standing position, and sure enough her tail lifted up into a cheery arc over behind her, exposing way more of her underside than she was comfortable with. She didn’t even know what was down there anymore! Did it look like Winona? Apple Bloom’s pupils narrowed at the thought and she really hoped it didn’t look like Winona’s.

“There, see your tail is goin’ down just fine,” Applejack chided her, prompting Apple Bloom to look back at her butt. Her tail had indeed shoved itself up against her legs all by itself, when she felt the cold wave of dread that can only come from realizing your private parts might resemble that of the local livestock now.

She peered at it, wiggling the muscles in her butt trying to find whichever one governed the raising of the tail. If she could get conscious control of that then maybe—woah it was—darn it, it was lifting up again! It felt more like straining her back than her butt, oddly.

“Well, uh,” Applejack vacillated, “But when you sit down in your chair it’ll be fine!”

So Apple Bloom got to sit in the booster seat again, this time having to sit like a little dog in a booster seat, with her bottom embarassingly cold against the hard plastic.

“Ah figure you didn’t wanna try uh, eggs,” Applejack said nervously as she presented Apple Bloom with a steaming bowl of fresh cooked oatmeal. “So uh... here you go.”

Apple Bloom stared at the bowl in front of her disapprovingly, then looked up at her sister exclaiming, “How am ah shupothed to eaht thish?”

Applejack blushed and fiddled with her own hands self consciously, saying, “Well you just, you just stick your uh, you can... how about some... toast?”

“Tothsht..tosht woul’ be gool,” Apple Bloom said, ears drooping.

So Applejack ended up with a nice hot steaming bowl of oatmeal for breakfast, to which she added some honey and butter she was afraid would hurt Apple Bloom’s stomach. And Apple Bloom got plain... toast. Just plain toast.

“Aw ‘ou pthure ish oesthn’t” Apple Bloom asked through a mouthful of toast, then blushed and carefully finished what she was eating before saying, “Are you shure thish doeshn’th have budder inshide?”

“Nope,” Big Mac said, “Just plain toast. Still too rich?”

Apple Bloom nodded, looking at the remaining half piece with trepidation. “An’ ith reawlly shweeth,” she added.

“Guess you’re done?” he asked plainly.

Apple Bloom nodded again, saying “Can ah geth down an’ thry more warlking? ...war... wa-l-king?” However terribly she said it, they somehow seemed to understand, and Applejack hooked under Apple Bloom’s wrists again and lifted her to the ground, thankfully avoiding supporting Apple Bloom by the bottom of her very embarassing posterior right now.

Apple Bloom toddled about in her odd double step, until it fell all on its own into a quadrupal beat. Pausing she noticed that what was happening was her back hoof was pushing the opposite front one down, so instead of them both hanging in the air at the same time she went off balance toward the front hoof, so she always had three on the ground at any given time. She looked up feeling excited about her discovery, and... there was her family over there, sitting at the dining room table and eating themselves a nice hardy breakfast.

Granny was talking about something and Applejack was barely listening, watching Apple Bloom walk around while she twirled the spoon idly in her oatmeal. Big Macintosh just went slicing at his eggs benedict quietly. “Lookin’ good, Apple Bloom!” Applejack shouted out when Apple Bloom looked up at her, and that really did make Apple Bloom feel good, it really did, but... then her stomach growled. Like, really loudly.

Applejack’s smile faltered and she said, “You feel up to eatin’ any more?”

Apple Bloom was just too unsure of herself to say yes. She was hungry, but... she already had toast, and orange juice. She was all juiced out. Just like... last night.... The plate with the hay on it lay discarded on the counter, and Apple Bloom eyed it with unease. It just didn’t seem natural... she didn’t even know if she would like it. And then... a thought occurred to her, a thought that really probably oughtn’t to have occurred to anyone anywhere ever, except maybe to a girl who’s been transformed overnight into a tiny horse.

Apple Bloom was still trying to figure out turning. It was easy if you had some space to move forward, just to angle your hips around. Without moving forward, though? The scissor stepping she supposed, or maybe just walking her back legs around like she had an orbiting butt. At least Apple Bloom didn’t have any trouble navigating her way to the back door in the dining room, pausing at it saying, “Can ah go outhide for a bith? Ah wanna thry something”

Big Macintosh stood up, walking over to her and pulling the door open. Applejack stood up too, but Apple Bloom didn’t wait, walking out before she lost her nerve. The morning sun was bright and cheery but the air was still frigid. Apple Bloom didn’t need to worry about that, since she had a fur coat to keep her warm, but it still unsettled her. You’re supposed to walk out into the cold, and blow into your hands, and feel the chill bite at your cheeks, and the rest of your body is supposed to be bundled up and protected. But, Apple Bloom didn’t get to do that anymore, so she just felt cold all over.

The frost hadn’t yet come this year so everything was still reluctantly green from the bountiful summer before. The noise from the auto traffic drifted through the air even from way out here in the outskirts of town where her farm lay. There were hills around here where you could see the whole town from above, but the farm house was located low and in a big clearing surrounded by trees, so there was no sight of anywhere else in the world, only the distant sounds. Applejack and Big Mac had their heads poked around the doorway, and Granny squeezed in underneath the two of them, all of them looking at her concernedly. Apple Bloom knew this would work though, because why wouldn’t it? It was just what the doctor ordered.

So Apple Bloom stuck her neck out and it was easy to lower her head to the level of the ground without barely even hunching over. She looked at it with apprehension, trying to see how it was gonna work, and opened her mouth uncertainly. Then she closed her eyes and just took a big bite out of a tuft of grass in the untended field just outside her house. Her teeth cut through the blades like a knife and she lifted her head slightly to pull the last strands apart from the ground. Her heart was thudding in her chest as she felt the taste of it hit her tongue, the smell rising through her sinuses.

It just... tasted like grass, so why....

She chewed her little bite carefully and experimentally, then stuck her head down for another bite of grass. There was some water hitting the ground next to it for some reason. By the third bite, the others had come outside too and surrounded her on three sides as Apple Bloom put on her little show for them, using herself as an example. Granny murmured in an apprehensive tone, “Apple Bloom, are you okay?”

“Ith good!” Apple Bloom admitted loudly, and she would have said more, but her voice was going all over the place, and she just couldn’t control it right now. “Ith’s...” she couldn’t think of what to say, or what would you say, so she just took another bite of grass. Her experiment was a success! This had been just the right thing to do, and she was so hungry she needed it bad. It was hitting the spot she hadn’t been able to hit all today and yesterday, and that was great! Problem solved!

Then why couldn’t Apple Bloom stop crying?

Apple Bloom felt more than a little shell shocked, by the time her family finally managed to coax her back inside. Her thoughts were so slow and muddy, like the dumb animal she was supposed to be. She couldn’t even find it in herself to care whether she could do math or read or remember her own name, or anything she used to be able to do. What was even the point anymore? All she could think to do was stare dully forward wishing that she could have maybe made something of herself as something besides some kind of circus freak horse thing.

Applejack managed to coax her out of it by patiently sitting with Apple Bloom and talking with her until she listened, about silly things like dances and cow poop and that funny news crew (they hadn’t even bothered to tune in to see if the story aired), and about Applejack’s silly friends like how Pinkie Pie was trying to coordinate a stage play with the Ecology club and didn’t seem to mind she was failing utterly at it. Pinkie was the kind of person who could get a laugh out of you even if she was halfway across town being talked about by proxy to a girl who had for all intents and purposes been changed into a horse. Laughing helped a lot more than Apple Bloom wanted to admit it did.

What really helped though was when Granny charged up like a raging bull with a tape measure in one hand and a cell phone in the other, and made Apple Bloom stick her neck out to measure how long she was now, from head to ...butt. Not counting tail. Granny recited the measurements rapid fire to ...whoever it was on the other end of that phone.

“Oh thank heavens, doctor!” Granny said, making Apple Bloom at last pay attention to whatever it is that Doctor Stable guy is saying. At least, her ears turned towards the phone. Good grief did that still feel weird.

All the doctor said though was, “May I speak with her right now?” Granny heartily agreed, and squatted down to the level of Apple Bloom and Applejack. Applejack was still sitting there next to Apple Bloom, on the living room floor where after her ill fated grass venture, upon reentering the warm confines of her home, Apple Bloom had collapsed hopelessly on the spot. Granny was all awkward about the phone, trying to hold the earpiece up to Apple Bloom’s ear, but Apple Bloom just turned her head to face it and said into the tiny microphone,

“Dthocg?”

She grimaced, forgetting how weird it was to speak now. “Dth...doc?” she managed to say clearly. “Sh-sorry mah voice ish kindtha weilrd stirll.” Gosh darn it where do you put your tongue to say ell?

“Apple Bloom!” he said in a pleasant tone made tinny over the phone speakers, “You have no idea how glad I am to hear that you’re still defying the laws of physics. Are you well? Granny said your mental faculties were intact!”

“Faculthy?” Apple Bloom said confusedly, “Ah ain’ go’ no teaschers running aroun’ in mah headh.”

After the doctor got over his sudden spontaneous leg cramp explaining the prolonged silence with chortling noises in the background, he explained to Apple Bloom that he’d been measuring her height... which is now her length if that weren’t obvious, and according to his calculations she should be 2 feet 1 inch long. Apparantly she was 2 feet, 4 inches long though! 3 inches didn’t seem a very decisive amount, especially since she could stretch her neck really far forward, but it was a promising sign at least.

As a more reliable measure, he asked her if she could weigh herself, to see if her weight was still changing like it had been, and they had a bathroom scale but it only was accurate to the nearest pound. She couldn’t balance enough to put her entire weight on it either. Her legs were... her arms and legs were just a little bit too far apart to all fit on there.

He grumbled a bit at that, and said, “You need to talk with the vet. I know, you don’t want to be thought of as an animal, but she knows how to weigh animals so she can probably help you there. Just tell her that you should be less than 17 pounds. If you weigh more than that, then the rate at which you are transforming may have slowed down, or stopped entirely!”

“Thath greazhe–” she exclaimed excitedly, stopped, and said very slowly and sounding out, “That...’s... greeea...t... hnews.”

“Hmm,” came his thoughtful response.

“Mah moush ish weirld sorry,” she said. “Ah cang shtill think an’ shtuff.”

“I’m going to make a few more calls,” Doctor Stable said, “You get in touch with the vet and have her check you over. She should be more confident if you are... convincingly animalistic.”

Granny couldn’t hear the other end of the phone like Apple Bloom could, so afterwards Apple Bloom told her what he said (with difficulty), and when she did, Granny Smith brightened right up like a Granny shaped sunrise. Granny called the vet right away, and Dr. Cureall was apparantly happy to drive on over to see Apple Bloom face to face, or, face to knee as such the case would be. It was strange having a doctor be so accomodating, but Apple Bloom must have excited her a whole lot, and it was clear that Apple Bloom was in no mental state to be in any kind of stressful unfamiliar environment right now like a vet’s office. Or at least, stressful to a dog maybe, but the vet wasn’t really used to having patients who understood what a doctor’s office is good for.

Both Apple Bloom and Applejack were upset to hear Granny say on the phone, “Ah caint be here cause ah gotta work, but one o’ my grandkids will show ye around.”

“Ah gotta get to school, Granny!” Applejack protested afterwards. “Caint anyone sub for you today?”

“Nope,” said Granny, “Either ah stay here or the whole school goes without lunch, an’ ye can only pick one! So’s it’s gotta be either you or Big Mac, an’ ah know Apple Bloom likes you best.”

It might have been relevant to say that Applejack and Granny Smith were having this discussion privately behind closed doors. Apple Bloom’s new ears were really easy to press up against those doors though to hear what goes on behind them in quiet tones.

“Don’t be silly, Granny,” Applejack said abashedly, “Apple Bloom likes all her family the same. Ah ain’t anythin’ special.”

“Well who did she wake up on top of this morning then,” Granny countered, “Winona?”

Apple Bloom almost stopped listening at that point. The thought of herself being anywhere near Winona or Gummy right now was chilling. If those horses were huge before, now it’d be like two giant mountains of bestial equine flesh. And that was making Apple Bloom feel very uncomfortable to think about, in ways that were very uncomfortable to think about.

“Point taken, Granny,” Applejack grumbled, “But tomorrow it’ll be Big Mac, and ah’m gonna need a letter excusin’ me for today.”

So it was decided, that Granny and Big Mac would head on over to the high school today, and Applejack would stay behind with Apple Bloom. Apple Bloom scrambled back from the door before they opened it, sitting there trying to look all innocent and not listening in, because she just happened to be sitting on her butt in the hallway, just coincidentally. Neither lady gave her a hard time of it. Mac fired up the truck and he and Granny drove off for Canterlot High. That left Apple Bloom and Applejack with nothing to do but wait for the vet to arrive.

That and practice walking.

She was gonna have to eat more grass, wasn’t she.

That hay was starting to look a lot less unappetizing in comparison.

Author's Note

Assessing the Damage

Apple Bloom wanted to pace back and forth as she waited for the vet to arrive at the Apple Acres, but turning on a dime for Apple Bloom was quite beyond her capabilities. Before the vet could come, Applejack had to lead the cows out to pasture first, yet another chore they’d delayed on account of Apple Bloom, and that left Apple Bloom by herself in the farm house.

The house was so empty Apple Bloom thought, when you were the only one there. It seemed even more empty when you were half as tall as you used to be. Apple Bloom walked outside again, not feeling comfortable about the emptiness. Applejack had left the door ajar for her, so it wasn’t any trouble to go outside. The back door didn’t have stairs, instead leading straight to the lawn, so it continued to not be any trouble to go outside.

Apple Bloom couldn’t believe how good the sun felt on her back. It felt like her skin was waking up. She wondered if it was the transformation that made her feel this way, or if it was just the continual embarassment of her bareassment. She’d never gone out into the sun without clothes on after all, not since she was too little to remember. It was easy to confirm, so she went back in and came out with an experimental dish towel draped over her flank.

“Huh,” Apple Bloom said conclusively, then tossed the dish towel aside so she could enjoy the welcome waking feeling of the sun as any horse would: in the nude. Wasn’t anyone around here she had anything to hide from, after all!

Normally with the three siblings and Granny Smith all at school, the cows were fine by themselves at pasture, but the horses had to be cooped up an awful lot. You couldn’t really risk putting them out to pasture because of the likelihood that they’d hurt themselves or jump a fence and run away. It was certainly not ideal to have the farm run itself on empty during the day. Just staying behind to watch Apple Bloom had shown Applejack a bunch of things that needed doing, things that she could get doing because she was off school for the day watching her little sister horse.

Apple Bloom wanted to help but, well, at least she wasn’t a danger of being a fence jumper. But she couldn’t help much, no matter how easily her sister made herself busy, so Applejack kept herself busy while Apple Bloom kept herself ...occupied. That was all Apple Bloom could do. It left Apple Bloom with a lot of time to think about herself at least, and whether she was feeling any worse changes coming on.

She felt fine actually. More than fine, she felt downright perky. Apple Bloom knew she shouldn’t be feeling good about having to skip school, but it was nice to just relax and run around, and even play. Or more accurately, relax and walk hesitantly around and play. But gosh was it fun just moving around in a way that she thought was too simple to enjoy. There was just something fun about playing hookey, even if you had to be a little horse to do so.

Applejack walked up from the horse barn, where she’d let off Winona for her morning feeding, finding Apple Bloom attempting to master jumping forward. Apple Bloom had it down to where she was crouching down and wiggling her hindquarters to get an idea of what they felt like, then jerking her front side up and kicking her back legs forward at the same time. Apple Bloom ...didn’t really have it down at all. In fact, she was measurably unsuccessful at jumping, this particular time. Right in front of her sister too.

“Hey Apple Bloom,” Applejack said blocking the sunlight and looming over a dizzy Apple Bloom fallen prone, “You okay?”

“Justh trying thoo figure ou’ jumping,” Apple Bloom said up to her sister, rolling over on her belly and carefully standing up again. “Sthee,” she demonstrated, throwing her chest back and making her arms lift up, waving them in the air before they plummeted back down to the ground, “Ah figuredh outh how thoo rear up like a horth, so jumping sthould be eashy.”

“Jumpin’ huh,” Applejack said thoughtfully, “Well it’s great you’re movin’ around okay. Ah’d hate to think you couldn’t. Maybe not as much luck speakin’ better though, huh?”

Apple Bloom blushed and her tail lowered on its own despite herself. She sure had been working on moving so much, that she hadn’t really been working on talking at all. Apple Bloom wasn’t really sure how to work on the latter. Her mouth was the strangest part of her right now, with the huge gap between her incisors and molars, and with that weird tongue of hers, and that big long snout that should have dominated her vision when actually she could barely see it. Having elbows that locked up was pretty mundane in comparison to how sensitive her lips had gotten.

Applejack knelt down to look at Apple Bloom more evenly, saying “The vet’ll be here soon. Anything ah can do for you in the meantime?”

“Juth um,” Apple Bloom hesitated, then nodded decisively, “Ah coul’ use somethin’ ta eath maybe.”

Applejack scratched the side of her nose. “Ah’d say to wait for the vet,” she offered cautiously, “But you been doin’ alright so far with eatin’ stuff, and not just horse food neither. You uh... ain’t gone an’ eaten any more of the lawn have ya?”

Apple Bloom blushed even harder, saying, “Nho... ah sthould eath shome though, ah guethh.” She looked at the grass beneath her hand–hooves reluctantly. Darn it why was it looking kind of tasty now? It was just grass it tasted like grass and the satisfactionary feeling when chewing it was... probably an indicator that she thought it was tasty now.

“How about you try some stuff more formulated for eatin’ than just some wild grass,” Applejack suggested.

Apple Bloom frowned. “Hay?” she asked.

“Hay,” Applejack nodded in agreement.

“Ith tho shtupid to shee grathh on a plate,” Apple Bloom complained bitterly.

Applejack looked down at her thoughtfully, then stood up and walked silently into the farm house. She came back with the hay bundled in her arms and not dumped on a plate. Applejack held out a handful of the dry strands at approximately her waist height, saying, “Alright, ah want you to rear up now and take a bite out of these.”

Apple Bloom snorted a laugh. “Ah’m noth a dhog,” she said rolling her eyes.

“Course you ain’t, that’s why ah’m tellin’ you,” Applejack said stubbornly. “It ain’t like a dog it’s just a lil’ game to make things interestin’. Ah ain’t just gonna spoon feed you even if you ain’t got no hands no more.”

“Maybe ah’ll juth eat thish then,” Apple Bloom said snidely, ignoring the hay and sticking her nose into the teasy tangles of live grass underneath her. Her sneeze knocked her back a step. She looked up at Applejack in abject um... something. Alarm. But the ridiculousness of it was just too much, and Apple Bloom felt her mouth quirking upward in that way where the more you try to stop it, the harder it is not to laugh.

Applejack couldn’t hold it in either and they were both laughing pretty soon. It was really humanizing in a way. Apple Bloom might be some kind of horse thing, but here she was sharing that common bond of laughter with her sister. Apple Bloom still sounded like herself, for the ...most part, and she still was herself so far. Being reminded of how similar the two of them still were made it seem more tolerable to be totally different on the outside.

Apple Bloom reared up impishly and rested her front hooves on Applejack’s thigh, stretching her neck over to take a big bite out of the handful of grass extending from Applejack’s idle grip. She mumbled something unintelligible that was supposed to sound like “Got it!” and pushed away onto her four hooves. Then Apple Bloom realized that she had just gone and ate hay, and she kind of blanked for a moment. She was just messing around still, though! It was a joke! She wasn’t really eating... yet there she was standing there on all fours with a big bunch of dry grass sticking partway out of her mouth.

Even Applejack seemed surprised that her encouragement had worked so well, and watched hopefully as Apple Bloom crossed her eyes, trying to chew the crunchy dry stuff. Her incisors were pretty useless after the first initial bite, but it settled into that weird between-tooth groove naturally, and she could roll the strands from there, bit by bit, onto her rear molars for chewing. Her mouth was watering a lot, turning the dry strands into a gooey chewed up ball. It was making her feel kind of thirsty.

What surprised Apple Bloom the most though was the taste. Because it tasted measurably better than the grass she’d eaten off the ground. It wasn’t as strong or pungent, and it didn’t taste as much like... well... grass. It tasted more like bread. In fact, it had more of an overtone of bread to it than the bread had had! She wondered... she wondered what kind of hay Big Mac had grabbed when he brought it in yesterday evening.

“Is thith wheath?” Apple Bloom asked uneasily, still having trouble saying it even though she made sure her mouth was clear. “Whea...t?” she repeated to clarify.

“Uh... ah reckon?” Applejack looked blankly at the considerably stubbier grass in her hand. “You’d have to ask Big Mac which bale he got it from.”

“Coul’ ah hav shome–ah mean... ah guesh ah could thry shome more...” Apple Bloom said, a little too excitedly.

“Well alright,” said Applejack, pinching the end of the little handful and waving the strands up above Apple Bloom’s head again. “Then let’s see if you can get it!”

That was what Dr. Cureall witnessed when she drove up, down the crumbly dirt road to that quaint farmhouse so far in the outskirts of town. Apple Bloom was rearing up and hopping into the air while Applejack teased her higher around the farm girl in circles, with the tantalizing wheat grass just barely out of reach. Apple Bloom was having way too much fun when the doctor spoke up behind her,

“Well, at least she’s well behaved!”

Apple Bloom startled then and overbalanced, falling nose first into the ground. It didn’t hurt as much as it should have, but it still hurt. “Ouw...” she muttered under her breath, pushing her arm-legs against the ground to lift herself up, rubbing her nose with one. She continued in her circle around behind Applejack, at her slow walk. It was the easiest way Apple Bloom could think of to turn around, so that she could face the doctor. When she came around from behind her sister, Apple Bloom felt really nervous for some reason, but it wasn’t like a stranger or anything. If she wasn’t so giant sized, Dr. Cureall would practically be familiar enough to call a friend by now.

Dr. Cureall was wearing more functional khaki cargo pants now, and a white collared button up shirt with a pocket stuffed full of pens. Her blue white hair was still back in a ponytail, and she had a stethoscope hanging around her neck. She didn’t approach when she saw Apple Bloom’s hesitance, saying to Applejack in a kindly tone, “Is it alright if I get a look at her?”

“C’mon, Apple Bloom,” Applejack said encouragingly. Not that she had to encourage her, because Apple Bloom was totally confident, cool and collected when she crept out from behind Applejack. She certainly wasn’t stifling a whimper looking up at the veterinarian. It wasn’t like this was the first non-family member who ever saw Apple Bloom as a little horse completely naked except for the giant bow in her hair.

The vet knelt down to Apple Bloom with a look of wonder on her face. “Well I’ll be. I’ve never seen anything like this before! Is this as small as she gets?” she asked up at Applejack.

Applejack, who glanced at Apple Bloom uncertainly, answered, “We don’t rightly know, as we caint weigh her on the bathroom scale, and she’s way too light for the livestock scale. Dr. Stable said if she was above 17 pounds, then she wasn’t gettin’ any smaller.”

“That’s just about the lower limit any horse has ever weighed!” the veterinarian said, “I took the liberty into reading up some on miniature horses, but even newborn foals can be up to 25 pounds.” She gave Apple Bloom another critical eye and said, “This one doesn’t look newborn though. I’d say at least 2 years old. This is really ...her?”

Apple Bloom nodded, but Dr. Cureall was looking up at Applejack, who was also nodding. Wait a sec...

The vet approached Apple Bloom crouched-down, with a hand cautiously outstretched in an open palm. She didn’t look Apple Bloom directly in the eye, but was just making soothing chk-chk noises with her tongue. Apple Bloom was starting to feel real uncomfortable about exactly what was going on here. Unsure of what to do, Apple Bloom just stuck her arm out and rested the hoof at the end of it on the vet’s palm, in a vague attempt at a handshake.

“My god that is just precious,” the vet said with a huge smile, closing her hand so very lightly and timidly around Apple Bloom’s little hoof. Apple Bloom looked up at her sister for any idea but Applejack was just looking back at her with an equally confounded expression.

Apple Bloom looked back at the vet, kind of warily turning her nose sideways and greeted Dr. Cureall with, “Uh... hi.”

“Oh jezus it still talks!” the vet exclaimed in utter bewilderment. She let go of Apple Bloom’s hoof as if it burned her, and lurched back violently, half standing up before falling harshly onto her butt.

Apple Bloom stared open mouthed at the vet before exclaiming angrily up at her sister, “Applethack!”

“Oh lordy, ah forgot to tell ya!” Applejack slapped her hand over her forehead. “You thought she was just a horse?!”

The vet looked frantically between Applejack and Apple Bloom with a dumbfounded expression just saying, “But... how... but... what... how...”

“Ah’m shtill me,” Apple Bloom explained to the vet as gently as she could what with Applejack telling the vet she was just a dumb horse. “Even nhow!”

“How is that possible?” Dr. Cureall finally managed to spit out, “You don’t even have room for a brain!”

Apple Bloom shrunk back fear swelling at the vet’s sudden harsh tone. “Ah don’ know!” she worried. “Ah jus’ am! Asthk me anything, ah can sthill do ith!” she added challengingly, reflexively squaring her hooves on the ground.

The vet blinked slowly, then said in a wavering tone, “What’s... 10 minus 7?”

“Hthree,” Apple Bloom said quickly.

“19 plus... 23?”

Apple Bloom had to pause there, tapping her hoof here and there on the ground to remember the places and carrying. “Fourthythoo!” she concluded triumphantly, puffing her chest out.

“You remember everything?” the vet said skeptically.

“Yeth,” Apple Bloom asserted, “Ah’m sthill me an’ ah wanna sthay that hway, sho can you figure a way outh thoo meashure how big ah am? Ah jus’ wanna shtop schanging an’ be g...done with itsh!”

The doctor cast a pleading gaze to Applejack asking weakly, “...what did she say?”

Apple Bloom hated not being able to talk right! She hmphed in frustration. It came out sounding like a horse. Now she felt like crying again.

“We need to measure her weight,” Applejack said carefully, “An’ the people-doc said you might know how.”

The vet blinked again, then she said, “Oh! Oh right!” Picking herself up dazedly, she straightened her disarrayed collar saying to Applejack, “If you can show me your bathroom scale there’s an old trick for measuring cats and dogs that I... think would work on her, if she’s not too heavy.”

At the threshold of the bathroom, Apple Bloom caught herself looking at her reflection in the door mirror again. Nothing had changed that she could see. It was a lot less horrifying when you knew what you were going to see in there, even if you couldn’t see your own butt in it, because your body was so distorted that your butt extended out beyond the boundary of the mirror. A sudden thought occurred to Apple Bloom that maybe at a different angle she could see her butt, like, see see her butt in the mirror, to see how bad it looked... down there.

Her tail went down at the very thought, and the vet was ready for her anyway so Apple Bloom didn’t have to worry about it. “I still got it,” the vet said smugly, as she stood alone on the scale weighing herself. Apple Bloom wasn’t sure at first how weighing yourself helped weigh someone else, but she found out quickly when the vet stepped off the scale and crouched down again in front of her.

Dr. Cureall held out her arms around Apple Bloom then hesitated then said, “Uh... I am going to have to pick you up. Is that alright?” in a rather forced tone.

Apple Bloom turned her head shyly, but nodded saying, “N-no problem.” So the vet braced one arm against Apple Bloom’s chest, wrapping it around the side of her, and that was the easy part. The other hand tucked underneath in front of her legs... her back legs, then wrapped around the underside of her lower torso, a part of Apple Bloom which was a lot more sensitive than her um... chest. The vet stood up then, grunting as she took on Apple Bloom’s weight with some, but very little difficulty. Dr. Cureall’s two arms became like a sling that lifted Apple Bloom along with them, Apple Bloom’s own four ...legs dangling down below her.

“Y’alright?” the vet asked her.

“Ith fahn,” Apple Bloom said shortly, a blush rushing to her face. It sure didn’t feel bad at least. She didn’t want to think about what was being felt though. So the vet walked over and stood on the scale, reading the number once it settled, then stepped off it and squatted down again, placing Apple Bloom’s hooves securely on the ground before releasing her torso.

“Well, you appear to be about 21 pounds,” the vet said. “That’d put you on the small side as far as medium sized dogs are concerned. Uh, n-not that you’re a dog I mean, you know, you know what I mean.”

“Thwenthyone poun’s?” Apple Bloom said thoughtfully, “But that’h way above.... thehventheen poun’s!” Wow, she never realized how much harder numbers were to say than any other words. So many freaking esses and tees. But that meant...!

“So she’s done?!” Applejack asked the vet, who looked at her uncomprehendingly. “She’s done changing?” Applejack clarified.

“I don’t... how much was she supposed to weigh again?” the vet asked vacillating.

“17 pounds,” Applejack answered, “Or lower.”

“She is definitely over 17 pounds,” Dr. Cureall said. “You mean about Doc Doc’s calculations? He could’ve been wro—I mean, yes it does mean she’s done changing. You should call him and check though!”

“If ah’m dhone schangin’ hthen maybe ah won’th ge’ all dumb!” Apple Bloom exclaimed excitedly.

“You caint imagine how grateful we are, doctor!” Applejack said setting her butt down next to where Apple Bloom was standing and laying an arm around her tiny horseness. “Ah was afraid ah’d lose my lil’ baby sister!”

Apple Bloom started to smile but blushed horribly at that last part. “You alwayth hcall me htat!” she said upset at her sister’s dumb way she liked to refer to Apple Bloom. Apple Bloom was more upset with how much more accurate the jibe applied to her now. “Ah’m only hthree yearth younger hthan you!” she asserted to Applejack impotently.

Applejack pulled her arm back and looked gobstopped, herself. “Ah didn’t even think about that Apple Bloom!” she declared in an apologetic tone. “That was right thoughtless of me! Ah only meant it like a joke as always; ah didn’t mean you were literally like that.”

Applejack looked at the doctor and gave her a helpless look asking plainly, “Why’s Apple Bloom all like a baby now?”

The doctor paused, and then said curtly to Applejack, “Listen, I know all there is to know about horses, and Apple Bloom is no ordinary horse. I can check her vitals and maybe even make a suggestion or two about how much she resembles a horse and should therefore act like one, but this is... this is something so beyond anything... I just don’t even know what to tell you. Maybe she’s supposed to look that way? Gypsy curse? I can’t say!”

She leaned closer to Apple Bloom asking her in a whisper, “You didn’t offend any gypsies lately, did ya?”

Apple Bloom tried to hold back a laugh.

“All right, alright,” Applejack conceded. “Just check her over and ah’ll call the doc.”

Applejack stood up, leaving Apple Bloom feeling vulnerable once again. It was a small comfort that her tail went down, but Apple Bloom didn’t feel comfortable just standing like this under the scrutiny of others. She couldn’t fiddle with her hands nervously, or scratch the back of her head or cross her arms or anything. Her arms were holding her weight as much as her feet, so she just had to stand there clumsily, not feeling confident that she was coordinated enough to move with them fluidly if the vet did anything unexpected or sudden.

Didn’t help that the vet kept talking down to her, when she talked to her at all.

“Alright, suppose I’ll take a listen to you,” the doctor started off, putting a hand against Apple Bloom’s shoulder to steady her and pressing the cold stethoscope against Apple Bloom’s belly... side... barrel. She put the stethoscope in two spots on either side of Apple Bloom, one at the top of Apple Bloom’s thigh, the other right down by her... things she didn’t want to think about. The metal disk of the stethoscope was so huge compared to Apple Bloom that there really wasn’t much difference in positioning it, but the doctor seemed to know what she was doing.

“Mmmhmm,” Dr. Cureall said, seeming satisfied by whatever she heard, moving the stethoscope to entirely underneath Apple Bloom, making her wince again from the contact. “Mmmhmm, mmhmm,” the vet continued, lifting the chilly metal disk and placing firmly on the part of Apple Bloom’s chest that was right behind her elbow. Or, no it was underneath her armpit. Or, her... elbow... pit... thing. Apple Bloom didn’t know how her arms worked, or why her armpit was at her elbow. Dr. Cureall seemed to find all the most uncomfortable spots to put that thing!

The vet’s fingers pressed alongside dimpling into Apple Bloom, holding the stethoscope against her. The vet looked at her other hand which had a watch on the wrist. There was a minute long pause. Then she took the stethoscope away, and picked up her little notepad, writing something in it without saying what it was.

“Sho how’m ah dhooing?” Apple Bloom asked, blushing as she did. The vet just stopped, kind of looking at Apple Bloom blankly. “D-ooing?” Apple Bloom repeated, pronouncing it roughly correct, with difficulty.

“Oh!” the vet said in realization, “That’s right you’re a... right, you want to know those things. You’re doin’ just fine, honey.”

She didn’t clarify herself at all, and just started looking into Apple Bloom’s eyes and ears with a light, so Apple Bloom asked, “Were you hlishning... hlistening to mah belly?”

“Mmm, trying to hear your digestion,” the vet said distractedly, “You probably should eat more forage, lots more at least until you have a bowel movement. No way to tell if there’s any irritation or obstruction if there ain’t anything in there being digested!

“Sho like grassh an’ shtuff?”

“Yes, and with few grains as possible,” said the doctor stroking Apple Bloom’s neck gently and sticking her finger into the side of Apple Bloom’s mouth, peeling back her lips without even asking.

“Mlah?” Apple Bloom said a bit startled and the vet cooed at her,

“It’s okay honey, you don’t need to bite. I’m not gonna hurtcha.”

Apple Bloom’s brow knitted in frustration but she settled down and never even once came close to biting anyone. It wasn’t pleasant though. Apple Bloom’s lips were supple and sensitive, and too easily pulled out of the way to access her gums. That wasn’t pleasant because the vet kept depressing a fingertip into them along their length.

She seemed satisfied with Apple Bloom’s gums, but tsked when she was tracing a finger down the almost ninety degree turn of Apple Bloom’s neck. It was more that Apple Bloom’s neck went forward as it curved around down to become her chest, but at the base of her nape it ended up looking like a ninety degree turn. The doc didn’t like it, at any rate. And she poked worryingly at the base of Apple Bloom’s tail, which treacherously sprang up into a merry arc in the air any time Apple Bloom relaxed and stopped trying to cover her privates. Thankfully the vet didn’t go poking around in her privates.

Apple Bloom was a bit surprised when the vet started squeezing around her foot, which is to say the side of her rear leg that was straight up in the air. Apple Bloom looked back at her with confusion. The vet pushed her off balance then, and Apple Bloom had to lift her foot to catch herself, but before she could put it down the vet grabbed it and held her up by it. “Good girl!” Dr. Cureall said happily, setting down Apple bloom’s leg gently, then going and squeezing the foot again.

“Wha’re you hdoing?” Apple Bloom asked her exasperatedly.

“Oh! Um...” the doctor poked Apple Bloom’s foot again hesitantly, “Can ya lift your hooves for me?”

Even after they got that little misunderstanding dealt with, Apple Bloom was puzzled by how fascinated the vet seemed to be with what were pretty much just Apple Bloom’s weirdly shaped fingertips. But the vet got tired of poking at Apple Bloom’s surprisingly responsive hooves eventually. She didn’t say what she found though, which frustated Apple Bloom to no end.

When Applejack returned with a hopeful expression the doctor was busy pulling at Apple Bloom’s shoulder/side and Apple Bloom’s skin came away way too easy, hanging there a while before going back into place. “Whath’s tha’ for?” Apple Bloom prompted the overly uncommunicative doctor lady again.

“Mmm, you’re one dehydrated little horse. Gotta get some water in you,” the vet mumbled. And now that Apple Bloom thought on it, she hadn’t drank hardly anything since waking up today. She swallowed dryly hoping the exam would be over soon so she could get to that.

Applejack announced to Apple Bloom, “Doc says you should be down to 13 pounds by now, if you were still changin’. Ain’t no mistakin’ that! He said to weigh you after an hour to make sure. Ah hope whatever this is, is all done with ya though!”

“Oh, glad you’re here!” the vet said standing up to address Applejack. “I don’t suppose you’ve been hydrating her?” At Applejack’s blank expression the vet added, “...providing her with water?”

“Oh lordy you’re right!” Applejack said nervously, “Apple Bloom, why didn’t you say anything? You ain’t drank anything but part a glass of OJ, and after all that dry hay.”

“Bit dithtractedh,” Apple Bloom said moodily, “Can ah have some, please?”

“No juice!” the vet said earnestly getting in Applejack’s face.

“Uh, okay then,” Applejack said uneasily, “Ah was just gonna get some water anyhow.”

“It is very important she avoid sugary foods or food high in carbohydrates,” the vet pressed, “That includes juice! Too much could throw off her blood sugar and that leads to...” she looked at Apple Bloom with a nervous glance, “...bad things.”

“What kindtha thingsh?” Apple Bloom asked worriedly. “Ah cain’th hdrink dey...dje...jeuce anymore?!”

“I... I’m not saying you are going to get laminitis but it’s a very valid concern!” the vet said. Apple Bloom remembered reading about that word once before, but only vaguely. Applejack recognized it though because she paled immediately and said,

“Right, no juice. Got it.”

“Alright, that’s all set,” the vet said as Applejack jogged off. “Now just relax cutie and I’ll be right back.” She stroked Apple Bloom on the nose, then straightened up and strode off, heading towards her vehicle. Apple Bloom rubbed her nose with a hoof, feeling offended for some reason. Applejack came back first with the water and... well... it was understandable considering what a mess Apple Bloom made when she tried to use a cup but, well, Applejack came back with a nice clean fresh bowl of water.

Apple Bloom’s ears went down when she saw it. “Too much?” Applejack said abashedly, “Ah can go get a—”

“No no ith fine,” Apple Bloom said hastily. Applejack reluctantly set down the bowl, and Apple Bloom looked at it unhappily but... she was too thirsty to be proud. She couldn’t tilt it back to pour it down her throat certainly, so she stood in front of it and tried submerging her nose in the water and pursing her lips to just suck out some. That worked good actually, and Apple Bloom felt her ears turn up as her surprisingly parched tissues welcomed the sweet nourishment, gulping down mouthful after mouthful.

“Terribly sorry, Apple Bloom,” Applejack said as Apple Bloom finished lifting her dripping muzzle out of the water. “Forgot you might have to drink a lot more with the whole horse thing and all.”

“Sokay Happlhthath ah feerlh—feerlh...waithh...” Apple Bloom paused and smacked her lips again, and crossed her eyes at her muzzle, declaring angrily, “Oh no! Ah go’ arhl uuthed thoo thalthking wilth a dthry thoungue!”

“Didn’t catch that,” Applejack replied delicately.

Apple Bloom stared at the bowl in front of her then at her sister and said, “Thst...shs..shtill can’ thalgk... thalk gool... good. Thalk good. Can...tuh.”

Applejack looked like she wanted to reply but her anxiety was warring with her diplomacy. There just wasn’t anything anyone could say that wouldn’t just make Apple Bloom feel worse about herself and her big dumb floppy tongue.

Apple Bloom silently went down for another drink.

Running back with a medical bag, Dr. Cureall said to Applejack, “Sorry about that, I just needed one thing to finish a basic vitals checkup.” She smiled practically and held up a digital thermometer, then turned to Apple Bloom.

“Alright,” the doctor said looking down at Apple Bloom, but still talking to Applejack. “If you’ll keep her settled and calm, I should be able to take her temperature to at least get a baseline.” Apple Bloom sighed inwardly. This doctor just couldn’t accept that she was a person, not a wild animal who needed handling. Apple Bloom wondered how many people would react that way to her.

“You thon’t needth thoo harndle me,” she said to the doctor, who was startled by Apple Bloom talking (again! jeez!). “Thee?” she said, and Apple Bloom opened her mouth obediently, lifting up her tongue for easy insertion. When no thermometer came, Apple Bloom cracked an eye open at the doc who was looking very uncomfortable with her right now.

“Ehhh...” Dr. Cureall said with utmost caution and tact looking at the thermometer and Apple Bloom’s mouth with trepidation, “You really don’t want me to do that.”

So it turns out that Apple Bloom did appreciate being kept settled and calm. Let’s not forget the fact that, while a horse might not even notice a digital thermometer, Apple Bloom was like a tenth of the size of a full grown horse. So yeah. Handling.

She was never ever going to get a checkup from this lady again.

“Well, now that that’s all said and done,” Dr. Cureall said nervously to an equally uncomfortable Applejack, “Let’s go over Apple Bloom’s vital signs. I measured her heart rate at 103 which I’ll assume is average for her, now. It’s probably average for an ...animal of her size, along with her respiratory rate of 27.”

“Though, I bet they were higher during the temperature reading!” the vet said in exaggerated cheer with a sloppy grin.

The vet then coughed in the silence, “Sorry, bad joke. But seriously, that might not be her resting rate, as exams can be stressful and get the heart rate and breathing up, but it’s the best I can do on short notice. Her temperature is 100 which is right on the nose as far as horses are concerned. Her ears are clean, and her eyes are clear. Her eyes are... well, I mean...” She gestured at Apple Bloom broadly, declaring, “This isn’t a horse!”

They both blinked at the vet, and she tried to clarify herself. “Horses have horizontal pupils, first off. Apple Bloom here has round pupils, and they dilate radially. They’re probably the most humanlike part about her right now. In fact it might just be her small stature, I have no way to measure her before, but her eyes seem like they’re even bigger than a human’s! Which is the exact opposite from a horse’s eyes which should be smaller than a human’s.”

“Take a look at this,” Dr. Cureall said grabbing Apple Bloom’s tail unannounced and pulling it around over to Applejack. “Her tail goes all the way to the end here, see the part near the tip that’s still fleshy?”

“She definitely doesn’t have a horse’s tail,” Applejack said thoughtfully, “Otherwise it’d be all hair at the end.”

“Yet she has a tail!” the doctor declared releasing Apple Bloom to yank her tail to herself and curl around it blushing fiercely. “She stands on four legs that end in hooves. Her ears are motile, her muzzle is equine if terribly short for a horse’s muzzle. But even her hooves don’t quite fit the bill! Look at–” Apple Bloom jerked her hoof out of the doctor’s seeking grasp, shooting her a nasty look, and then stretching out the hoof on her own for Applejack to see... whatever she’s supposed to see.

“...right,” the doctor said meekly, “You can see the size of her frog it’s huge! Encompasses the entire hoof cavity. Also it’s strange, if you feel it... I mean, if that’s uh, okay with you that is...”

“Go aheadth,” Apple Bloom muttered rolling her eyes at the doctor. Applejack hesitantly poked Apple Bloom’s fingertip, or... ‘frog’ it would be now. Apple Bloom was finding her perception of her hoof a lot weirder than she thought it would be. It should have felt like Applejack had normal fingers, poking and pulling against Apple Bloom’s one weird big finger, but instead it felt to Apple Bloom like tiny little hooves were kicking hers. She had to look to convince herself that there wasn’t a tiny little horse in place of Applejack’s hand.

“Huh,” said Applejack. “It’s kinda sticky.”

Well, now Apple Bloom’s interest was piqued. She looked at the underside of her hoof but it was just a smooth yellow lump it wasn’t slimy or crusty or anything. What was so sticky about it? She tried touching her own chest with it, but–

“And that!” the vet exclaimed excitedly. “How are you doing that?”

Apple Bloom looked up at Dr. Cureall surprisedly, setting her leg back down as the doctor said, “No wait don’t–”

The doctor groaned then just stated tiredly, “Horses... cannot do what this– what Apple Bloom just did. They cannot look at the underside of their own hoof. It just doesn’t articulate that way. And they cannot make... arm... joints come out of nowhere. Seriously,” she looked up at Applejack gesturing at Apple Bloom, “Did you see that?”

Applejack gave the doctor an exasperated sigh, and said “You could just ask you know.” She then knelt down and said gently to Apple Bloom, “Can ya look at your own hoof again?”

Apple Bloom turned her hoof up obediently, but stayed looking at Applejack instead of looking down at it again. “Good, hold that pose!” Applejack cheered, then said to the doctor, “Now, you were sayin’ somethin’?”

“Fascinating!” the vet declared, running her fingers up and down Apple Bloom’s arm. “Alright, now if you can stand on your hoof again...” she instructed hestitantly.

Apple Bloom did so plant her hoof down, but made sure to ask, “Whath ith thith abou’?”

“Well, it’s almost like your shoulders are...” the vet trailed off, poking Apple Bloom’s side, as if searching for a way to describe it in there.

“Lohcking up?” Apple Bloom suggested. “zthey do thath when ah shtand on zthem.”

“I was going to say unlocking, but yeah,” the vet agreed, “Horses have fixed shoulders for structural support, just like when Apple Bloom is standing, but she seems to be able to ...release that, giving her front legs a greater freedom of motion...”

The doctor sat back on her rear on the floor, crossing her legs and cupping her chin, the gears in her head practically audible from across the room.

“Okay,” Dr. Cureall announced eagerly, “I think I got it! The dream Apple Bloom had was actually astral projection, through which she came to us from a parallel universe to our own where horses evolved sentience instead of humans, and she’s merely returned to her original form, and that’s why she resembles a horse but has so many characteristics we identify as human, because they evolved the same characteristics in stead of us!”

“That’s the most ridiculous thing I ever—” Applejack said conclusively and definitively, before Dr. Cureall interrupted her mid-sentence, by rushing up to Apple Bloom’s face and saying,

“What is it like in your home dimension? Do you live in cities or are you nomadic? Can we visit there? Are you the only sentient beings? Do you come in peace?”

“Apple Bloom is not from a parallel universe!” Applejack snapped at the doctor. “Ah don’t know why she’s this way, but this is mah very own flesh and blood, not some alien visitor from beyond! A parallel universe exists, full of smart horses? Where do you even get that idea? That’s just not”

Applejack paused.

“That’s not...” she said trying again, but couldn’t quite get it out. She turned her chin down fingers over her mouth thoughfully.

“Ith makess shensh,” Apple Bloom said hesitantly, looking at her own hoof... the only thing Apple Bloom had left to call a hand anymore. “Bu’ all ah ever remehmbehr,” she continued, “Isz bein’ nohrmal, an’ humahn. Ah wasn’ a pony zthe dhay before yeshterday, or any dhay before zthat. I was jus’ a nohrmal ngirl!”

Doctor looked at her blankly, saying “...didn’t catch that.”

Apple Bloom’s tail swished irritably. She said as clearly and curtly as she could manage. “dh...don’... Don’t. Remembehr. Nnnot. Being. Human.”

“Look. Ah got a friend,” Applejack said holding her hands up placatingly, “Who knows all sorts of stuff about magic and myths and golden apples an’ stuff. Ah’ll ask her again. But for now we caint worry about something we caint do nothin’ about. So enough of the speculation. Let’s just calm down, relax, and uh... anyone up for some grub?”

Dr. Cureall didn’t want to get paid for this visit. She said that witnessing something as incredible as Apple Bloom was payment enough. But Applejack insisted, though the vet gave her a huge discount, possibly because of the lunch Applejack prepared for her. No, definitely because of the lunch Applejack prepared for the doctor. Two words: stroganoff sandwich. And as lunch progressed, Apple Bloom came to envy that cow.

It was easy enough for Applejack to drag a hay bale of tasty alfalfa into the farm house, and alfalfa it turns out was quite tasty and nutritious for a growing little filly. And better yet, it didn’t have any of those scary grain carbohydrate things that could make your hooves fall off.

Apple Bloom didn’t feel nearly as humiliated as when she had when it was grass on a plate, either. She was fine with just pulling pieces off the block of hay with her mouth to chew on. Something about it being a natural hay bale made it more ...bearable, and Applejack had sort of gotten Apple Bloom over her inhibitions about eating the stuff.

And it wasn’t like Apple Bloom had to choke the stuff down dry. Not that it really was all that dry, but there was a nice big clean metal bucket they had. Apple Bloom even carried it into the house from the spigot all by herself, by holding the lip of the bucket firmly in her teeth. That she could do so, even with it full of water, made her feel a lot more confident about herself.

So Apple Bloom sat there placidly chewing on the mild tasting hay, and she should have been feeling confident and triumphant. But instead, her stomach rumbled treacherously, as she gazed longingly at the sour cream dipped strips of meat sliding in the molten cheese of the sandwich as it entered Dr. Cureall’s mouth again and again. The meat smell was to die for, and all that buttery fatty goodness that made the onions sweet as caramel, and even the bread was fresh baked rolls.

Bread that Apple Bloom could never eat again, or her hooves would fall off. Difficult to digest, impossible to chew, yet so tasty beef. It was sauteed in deliciously spicy mustard that made her nose twitch in delight, and was a deadly poison to her now. Onions that could give her anemia. And a nice side of fried potatoes that would give her colic, which would kill her faster than the laminitis.

Apple Bloom was definitely envying the cow in that sandwich by the end of lunch.

There was one more thing the vet had to do before leaving, which was weigh Apple Bloom. Apple Bloom was almost grateful when the lunch was over and the delicious smells were cleaned up, and evaporated back to the ambient smell of sturdy wood with a slight hint of the sweet clematis climbing the wall outside. At the bathroom door, she settled back on her haunches pretty easily this time, and the vet just wrapped her arms around behind Apple Bloom and lifted her up by her forelegs to weigh her. It was a lot less awkward for Apple Bloom than having an arm groping around down... there.

“...21.5 pounds,” Dr. Cureall announced, having taken the differential between their weights. Apple Bloom’s sadness and stress evaporated at the sound of that. Because... she was still her! She wasn’t some dumb horse after all! Just some... weird alien dimension horse who wasn’t dumb at all.

She even proved it, by doing some long division for Applejack and Dr. Cureall. Apple Bloom had to do it in her head of course, since she couldn’t write, and she got the wrong answer at first because she put the numbers in the wrong imagined columns, but her skill wasn’t any worse than it was before! Let’s see what Mr. Doodle thought about her math skills now!

Right, as soon as she... figured out how to attend school again.

Alright, so maybe not all her problems were over.

The doctor headed out having pushed all her appointments to the afternoon, leaving Apple Bloom alone with Applejack again. Pretty soon after that, the home phone started to ring. Applejack went to pick it up, saying “Yello?” Apple Bloom was busy pushing around some scraps of paper with numbers written on them, and didn’t bother listening to who it was, but then Applejack shouted over to her, “Hey Apple Bloom, it’s your English teacher!”

“Wha?” Apple Bloom said twisting her head around dumbfoundedly. Miss Harshvoice was calling her?

“Wants to know why you’re absent today,” Applejack said with a roll of her eyes.

“Um, uh...” Apple Bloom hesitated, wobbling on her hooves.

Applejack snickered then, and got a sly look on her face. “Why sure she’s here!” she declared to the phone, “Hold on ah’ll go get her.”

“Applethack!” Apple Bloom protested, but Applejack would have none of it, lifting the phone base off its place on the mantle, and lowering it to Apple Bloom’s level. Applejack squatted, holding out the receiver so Apple Bloom could speak, looking at her expectantly.

“Hurro?” Apple Bloom said into it, looking worriedly up at Applejack, who had this crazed grin on her face.

“Miss Apple Bloom!” came Ms. Harshvoice’s harsh...voice clearly out of the earpiece. “When that strange phenomenon occured, you never returned to class. I had assumed the worst had happened, when you did not arrive for class today! If you are so easily available, then why haven’t you come back to class? It was said your condition was not sickening or virulent, so you had better have a good excuse!”

“Ah’m thorry Merz Harshvoithe,” Apple Bloom said frantically, “Buh ah’m uh, sortha tha earsh goth worthe an’ hthen ah wen’ an’ thurned into thom kintha tdiny horthe! You goh’uh unthersthan! Ah cain’ come tho shcool like thith!”

There was an odd sort of interference in the phone signal then. It sort of sounded like one continued long agonisingly aggrivated scream. It was hard to hear though because the phone got knocked away when Applejack fell back on her butt laughing. Apple Bloom gaped at her, then frowned in realization exclaiming again, “Applejhack!” in outraged frustration. That just made Applejack laugh harder.

Applejack regained her composure, saying mirthfully into the phone, “Terribly sorry Ms. Harshvoice, but Apple Bloom has a bit of a mouth and throat condition, so she might be a bit hard to unnerstand right now.”

“You did that on purpose!” came Ms. Harshvoice’s disembodied accusatory shout.

“Ah really am sorry though,” Applejack said to her turning away from Apple Bloom. “Apple Bloom really does have a ...condition, an’ she ain’t gonna be able to come to school, maybe not for a ...while.”

There was a pause, and Ms. Harshvoice said in a strangely melancholy way, “I’m sorry to hear that. If she must miss a significant portion of the year it will set her back considerably.” There was another pause and her teacher said, “At least she has the farm.”

Applejack said something else but Apple Bloom didn’t really hear what they were talking about anymore, because her ears turned away and down on their own. After hanging up the phone, Applejack got down to the ground and looked Apple Bloom in the eye, saying “Ah’m sorry you got a bit of rotten luck here, but I swear we will get through this. As long as you’re true to yourself, things’ll work out alright somehow.”

Apple Bloom looked at Applejack hopefully, but the light of hope sputtered in her eyes as she did. “Ah’rll be in mah room,” she said dimly, turning away to head over there. “Ah’m ghonna gho prahctith shpeakin’”

She was sure Applejack wanted to say something to comfort her, but Applejack let her go. Apple Bloom wasn’t in the mood to be comforted anyway, and she really really needed to figure out how to use this mouth of hers without sounding like she was chewing on a bunch of marbles. It was one step of many that she had to overcome, if she was ever going to get a semblance of a normal life again, but she was determined to try her best no matter what the odds. Her ears went up as she firmed her resolve.

Apple Bloom then stopped at the stairs, looking up them with a blank expression.

“Uhm... Appleshack?”

Author's Note

Laminitis is a medical term for when a horse gets a hangnail. It is fatal.

...meanwhile in her basement fortress, Peppermint Twist chortled madly as her diabolical plan to give everypony a terrible lisp was at last coming to fruition

Settling In

The mornings would come later, as winter approached this time of year. The one thing Apple Bloom liked least about this season was having to look forward to getting up before the sun came up. So it was a small favor that as a pony, her obligation to get up and get ready for school was gone. She didn’t have to look forward to waking up early anymore, at least. Or look forward to anything, for that matter.

Waking up on the second day wasn’t quite as disorienting as when she woke up the previous morning, but it was pretty weird. Apple Bloom was in her bed when she woke up this time, snug under her smooth sheets and warm blankets. She wondered for a groggy moment just how the heck her pillow had gotten so giant. Then, she looked down at her furry little forelegs hooked neatly over the edge of the blankets. Apple Bloom sighed, and the sigh turned into a whimper, but she shook her head fiercely, squaring her jaw or... scrunching it or something, determined she wasn’t going to just up and cry like a baby, not even about this.

She just wanted it all to be a bad dream, to wake up her old self again, even if her old self did have to go back to that stupid high school. At least that would result in cool things eventually as she was told. School would give her all the world of possibility for anything she wanted to do, as long as she put her nose to the grindstone and stuck with it despite it not seeming helpful in the slightest at the time. But like this? How was she going to major in anything now? Grass eating? Hoofy kicks? Awful lisping?

Her mouth problems weren’t quite as bad from her practicing, at least not by the time Apple Bloom had near passed out from how late it was getting. They were still pretty bad, though. Apple Bloom was starting to feel self conscious about talking at all, when someone else was in the room, because she sure did sound funny, and who was going to understand her anyway? She tried so hard to say ‘s’ without whistling and it was just... she wasn’t sure how to do it. All Apple Bloom had really figured out about speaking so far was that she didn’t know how to say ‘s’ in the first place. When she thought about it, why didn’t it sound like whistling to say ‘s’ when you put your tongue like that, and exhaled? There had to be some trick to it. Or maybe Apple Bloom wasn’t supposed to talk in the first place.

Because she was a fucking horse.

Swearing silently to herself, Apple Bloom rolled over in bed, trying to get up. The plush mattress was challenging to stand on with just your toes, but it was huge compared to Apple Bloom now, so she had plenty of room to walk before she had to deal with the edge. It looked like a... long way down. She fidgeted at the edge of her bed nervously, wondering if she should call for help, or just try to work up the will to just jump. It couldn’t be that far down. It just looked like it, on account of how small she was now.

Apple Bloom hadn’t gotten herself into bed last night. She didn’t know who it was at first, because she had dozed off on the floor, falling asleep on her feet practically. It had been a struggle to rouse her attention back then, even when big strong arms wrapped around her body and lifted her up, depositing her gently in a comfy softness that Apple Bloom sluggishly recognized as her bed. It was just so easy to fall asleep; she hadn’t even wanted to open her eyes. The blankets were pulled up to her neck, and with a slight hesitation, the heavy comforter on top removed. Apple Bloom was quite warm though. Having fur did that to you.

She did crack her eyes open at the “G’night sis,” recognizing the sound of her brother’s voice. The window in her room was pitch black with night, until he retreated to the hallway, switching off Apple Bloom’s light. She yawned in the darkness as her eyes started to adjust, the speckles of stars glinting through overhead, as the blackness in her window adjusted to its tiny amount of tiny light, soft and blue.

And... then Apple Bloom awoke. She hadn’t even noticed falling asleep.

Apple Bloom hadn’t had any dreams she could recall last night. She hoped horse... things like herself had dreams. Maybe she could dream about being human again. ...something about that seemed really unsatisfying.

But this morning, on the edge of her bed, Apple Bloom was thorougly awake, and not going to get one more lick of sleep. Her throat was parched, and her stomach was grumbling earnestly. Not that Apple Bloom got to look forward to breakfast, or anything. Just grass, grass and more grass. But first, she had to get to the floor.

Wiggling to the edge of the bed, she managed to stand shakily, but she didn’t know how to turn around to slide down backwards. She finally just tensed up, and shoved off with her hind legs, and they slipped back against the sheets, sending her flying face first into the floor. “Woah! Uff!”

Moaning disconsolately, Apple Bloom lifted her head, then braced her hands—hooves, and her feet—her other hooves. Then, she rose to her ‘standing’ position, if you could even call it standing. What she felt like standing, was as if she were still lying down on her belly, but up on stilts. Apple Bloom wobbled around walking in a broad circle, coming right back to her bed, and strutting up to it with purpose. The light faded in her eyes though, as she looked up at her bedpost.

Apple Bloom reached out... that is to say, she stretched out her neck, and bit down on a very familiar thick pink ribbon. A tug of her head pulled it easily off the bedpost, where it pooled uselessly at her hooves. She looked at her clothing bureau, and back to her fallen ribbon, and both her ears and tail went down. It really was impossible, then. She couldn’t wear clothes anymore. She...

She couldn’t even tie her own bow anymore.

The other members of her family were already up, not having slept nearly as long as she did. Apple Bloom couldn’t quite figure why she’d need more sleep. Maybe it was a horse thing. But that meant more trouble for her, and more embarassment. She bit down on her ribbon again, shaking her head back and forth until she managed to whip it up over her shoulders. She left it dangling there, and started her slow walk to the head of the stairwell, the ribbon trailing on the floor along behind her as she did.

Someone was down in the kitchen below, cooking up what smelled like... Apple Bloom inhaled carefully... pancakes and ... oh lord almighty did Apple Bloom want bacon so bad. That smoked ambrosia that cut the sweetness of syrup like a lumberjack split apart a cord of wood tickled her nose like nobody’s business. She’d make her way down the yawning abyss that was the stairs all on her own if it meant she could get a piece of that.

That was just an impossible fantasy though, on both counts. The bacon, and the stairs. Apple Bloom squeezed her eyes shut self consciously, and called out, “Hey! Coul’ ah ge’ some helpf here?” Her words didn’t come out sounding... too bad. It was Applejack who poked her head around the kitchen doorway and said, “Apple Bloom, you’re up! How’re ya doin’?”

“Hungry,” Apple Bloom said, resentful of her own stomach.

That quenched the brightness in Applejack’s eyes, and she said abashedly, “Oh, yeah. ‘course. Sorry about... ah mean... it was right thoughtless of me–”

“Ah needh help wif mah bow,” Apple Bloom said, before her sister could apologize herself into the floor. “And... shtairs,” Apple Bloom mumbled inaudibly. Her head drooped down along with her ears again.

“Well, sure thing, sis!” Applejack exclaimed enthusiastically, charging up the stairs fast enough to make Apple Bloom’s head (and ears) snap up straight. “Whoops, sorry didn’t mean to spook uh... startle you,” Applejack said pulling back from Apple Bloom.

“Ith fine,” Apple Bloom said resignedly, holding up a hoof with the ribbon dangling over it. “Jus’ please ah... ah wantehd to wear at leasht shomething!”

“We can hook you up with some doll uh some pet uh... clothes...” Applejack shut up inelegantly, and just started tying on Apple Bloom’s bow. Standing back and adjusting it, then critically appraising her work, Applejack assured her sister, “We’ll figure something out.”

Apple Bloom gave her a look, then said “ok, fine.” She sat back on her haunches, and held her front hooves up for Applejack to take ahold of. Applejack looked at her, confused. Apple Bloom glowered at her and prompted, “Pick me up!”

Applejack nodded numbly, and lifted up Apple Bloom by her waist, holding Apple Bloom to her chest from behind, hands hooked around underneath Apple Bloom’s forearms, then stood there uncertainly. “Ok...?” Applejack said uncertainly.

“Go down the shtairs,” Apple Bloom instructed, pointing down the stairwell imperiously. Applejack descended the stairs, with Apple Bloom swinging in her arms. Once she reached the bottom, Apple Bloom said, “OK now put me down.” Applejack did so somewhat robotically.

“Thanks shis!” Apple Bloom finished with a bright smile. Applejack blinked at her, then said in realization,

“Oh right, the stairs! Dang, those must be giant for you!”

“Ah’ll geth the hang of it eventhually,” Apple Bloom said, turning away to hide her blush and walking to the kitchen in as much grace as she could manage.

“Hold on, wait just,” Applejack interjected, hurling herself in-between Apple Bloom and the ~~delicious bacon~~kitchen, “Sorry you don’t wanna go in there ah was just cookin’ up some bacon and oh lordy ah’m sorry you can go outside if it’s too bad a smell.”

“Itsh okay,” Apple Bloom said leaning on Applejack as she sauntered her away around Applejack’s legs. “Ah don’ mindh it one bit,”

“So, it still smells alright to you?” Applejack said confusedly, “Because you’re a... little... horse and all.”

Apple Bloom looked back at Applejack and gave an exasperated sigh. “It shmellsh sho good. Y’have no idear. Ah wish ah coul’ have some.” Her voice was starting to get trembly near the end, so she just shut up and walked over to where the bale of alfalfa, with a little bit chewed out of it, was still sitting against the wall, right next to her water ...bucket.

“Well alright, if you’re okay with it,” Applejack said uneasily, walking back to the sizzling pan, from which she poured off the excess grease just as God intended. Apple Bloom walked outside through the propped open back door, filled up her water bucket and returned. Big Mac met her on the way back in, him returning from taking the cows out to pasture. By then, Applejack was already onto the pancakes, frying them in the leftover bacon grease just as God intended. This was just about as holy a breakfast as you could get, without sacrificing a pig on the altar.

The alfalfa tasted as pleasantly mild to Apple Bloom as ever, but there was a bitterness in her heart that the most pleasant taste couldn’t get rid of. Apple Bloom felt like she was a stranger, watching her family eat breakfast. She hadn’t even bothered with trying to sit at the table, just standing beside the bale of what was now food. Apple Bloom couldn’t even eat the same things as them anymore. Could she even call herself an Apple anymore? She was more closely related to Winona now, than Applejack, or any of the others.

Plus, the smell was driving her absolutely bonkers. Apple Bloom had to hold herself back from shuffling towards the table, when the sweet smell of maple syrup hit her nose. She wondered if she could put maple syrup on hay. That sounded like an awful idea, but, maybe, just a... little bit and... and then her hooves go and fall off. Why did the stupid vet have to have such frightening warnings?! Apple Bloom always knew it was wrong for horses to have sugar, and it could kill them but... she never had to be the horse who can’t have the sugar cubes.

She looked down at her hoof, front left, while in the slow process of chewing through more alfalfa. The hoof itself, her fingernail so to speak, was still the same color as her fur. It hadn’t bled out pink like the rest of her skin. She settled back and tapped it with her other front hoof, the clop noise resounding as they clicked together. It was so weird having these things. Giant thick fingernails, and an oddly pliable fingertip that stiffened up nicely whenever she put weight on it. Her frog really was huge, proportionally at least. Apple Bloom knew from experience that with real horses, they had a big empty cavernous space in there, with a tiny little V of thick skinned, barely pliable flesh, on the inner part of the hoof. These hooves Apple Bloom had just looked... different, from that. Very slightly convex, but pliable, and instead of touching down with only her nail, she could really get a good grip when she braced them on the floor.

But no matter how different her hooves were, the thought of that big thick hoof nail detaching, and filling underneath with painful, infected, nasty... it was rightly terrifying. So Apple Bloom continued to eat her hay like a good little horsie, and tried to ignore the wonderful smells coming from the table, at which her loving family sat. Someone’s loving family, at any rate.

After breakfast, Applejack and Granny Smith headed off to Canterlot High in their beatup old pickup, leaving Apple Bloom and Big Mac stranded on their lonesome, three miles away from the nearest bus stop. Soon as they left, Big Macintosh came up quietly behind Apple Bloom, who was watching the truck drive away. Once it was out of sight, she turned at last to give him her attention, and he knelt down in front of her holding up a piece of.......

“Saved a piece,” he said. “Should be alright. Got salt in it and–”

Apple Bloom snatched the little strip of bacon out of his hands faster than you could blink exclaiming “Thank you! Thank you! Thanhk you!” She brought her other hoof up to cradle it between the two front ones, looking at it like a treasure, the little slice of fatty meat. Then she took the smallest of little nibbles out of the tip of it. Her eyes rolled up and her foot thumped on the ground as she exclaimed, “Oh man ah neededh htat.”

Big Macintosh gave her a confused look in response. “How’d you do that?” he asked.

“Do wha’?” she said taking another teeny nibble of bacon. Her incisors were just perfect to bite off little crunchy pieces you didn’t have to chew apart.

“Holdin’ it, ah mean,” he said, pointing at the bacon.

Apple Bloom tilted her head, “You mean wif mah hooves pinned togezher?” She held up the bacon, clumsily pinned between her hooves. Didn’t seem all that hard to imagine. One hoof, two hooves, bacon in between?

“No ah mean, before ya– ahh, never mind.” Big Mac stood up, turning to walk away. He looked back at Apple Bloom one more time, and gave a little smile saying, “Enjoy.”

Apple Bloom nodded brightly, taking another teeny little bite. Maybe if she ate it slow enough, it would last long enough to satisfy her.

It didn’t.

Big Macintosh actually spent a good portion of the day with his schoolwork, retreating upstairs to read quietly. Most people didn’t even know he was a techie. Though his reserved nature and his nonexistent social life kind of predisposed him for that sort of thing, he just didn’t look the part. Didn’t even really fit in with them at school. Still, it left him with plenty to study, certainly more than Apple Bloom ever wanted to take on. Or at least she hadn’t ever, until now.

Apple Bloom made herself busy with an old football, kicking it around in the backyard. The day was overcast, but not rainy. It was weird kicking a ball with hooves, but it was pretty easily mastered. Your front hooves, you just walked into it, and your back hooves you turned your back to it and pretended it was a snake. But seriously though, back kicks were easy. Part and parcel of being a horse, no doubt.

Problem is, having mastered kicking around a ball, Apple Bloom was getting bored of it. It was so dang quiet around here. The cows were all taken care of, the pigs were all slopped, the horses were too terrifying to contemplate. They’d gotten so used to this new school schedule that the farm practically operated itself, nowadays. So finally, Apple Bloom just ended up in the farm house again, looking up the stairs where Big Macintosh was studying in his room. She wondered if he’d share with her.

Anything would be better than just repetitively kicking a ball around, in mindless circles.

Apple Bloom stared up the stairwell apprehensively. They didn’t look that intimidating at least... at least not from the bottom. The lowest step, she could get up on just by rearing up slightly. At that point, it was just pulling herself up like a mountain climber. She was surprised at how easy it was, in fact, though she doubted it would be nearly as easy going down.

The hall was like she remembered it. Same hall as she always walked down, just bigger and wider, with the undersides of the tables in view instead of the top side. It felt like her home, but it didn’t look like it from down here, and that unnerved her. She hurried to Big Mac’s door and climbed up against it, lifting one of her front hooves to rap several times, then climbing down to stand squarely in front of it.

Big Macintosh opened the door and turned his head down, noticing her immediately down there. She gave him an earnest look and said, “Big Mac, can ah shtudy wif you?”

His eyes softened as he gazed down at her, and she waited for him to say yes, but instead he just said “D’aww.”

Apple Bloom blushed hotly and turned her head away.

“C’mon in,” Big Mac said above her, heedless of her embarassment, turning around and returning to his drafting table. What could she do though? He was totally right, so Apple Bloom just shuffled in behind him.

Big Mac’s room was... well, big, but that’s a given now. He had a bureau dresser like she did, but taller and narrower, and a bed that wasn’t a poster bed, and a broadly surfaced desk, or drafting table is what Apple Bloom liked to call it. As she walked in, Apple Bloom noticed kind of a funny smell in here, that she somehow found familiar. It wasn’t any kind of food smell she could place though.

She walked over to where Big Macintosh was sitting in his chair. There were a couple piles of textbooks on the floor around him to make space for the desk. Apple Bloom placed her hoof on some sort of Electronics reference text, one of the books on top of one of the piles. She figured how to flip it open, but soon found she was worried about tearing the pages with those solid hooves of hers. She tried rubbing her cheek against one, and found she could flip them pretty easily with her nose, if slowly. It wasn’t like she was in a hurry to read it, though. It was way above her level anyway, talking about ohms and integrals and circuitry terminology, as if the reader already knew all that stuff.

“Don’t ya have your own books?” Big Macintosh asked, looking down with concern at the confounded-at-Electronics Apple Bloom.

“Lef’ ‘em at shcool,” she answered unhappily, not even looking up. “Most of ‘em are in mah locker.”

“Ah’ll call AJ,” Big Macintosh said, making to stand up, “She can pick them up on her way back.”

“What’sh the pointh?!” Apple Bloom shouted surprisingly loudly, at the poor, unsuspecting Electronics textbook. She looked up then, and her brother looked down at her wordlessly, his soulful gaze an epic in of itself. Apple Bloom sighed.

“Ah’m goin’ to bed,” she mumbled, turning from the book and walking out of Big Macintosh’s room. She didn’t even really care that her ears were tilted down again.

After having failed to get up on her own bed, Apple Bloom had just collapsed on the floor in disgust. She traced her forehooves around in circles on the floorboards. She really should get her textbooks. This might not be permanent, after all. Or maybe she could be the first horse... something smart. Apple Bloom just didn’t feel like she had the heart for it though. Any ambition she had just seemed dried up and so far away.

Her patience was certainly worn way too thin, to put up with all that bullshit school liked to throw at her, on top of being turned into a horse. With her luck, Apple Bloom probably missed a big surprise pop quiz today, or yesterday, or... the day before. All the days she’d missed. And when she got back, she’d have to catch up on that quiz, and that’d make her fall behind on the current lesson, which she’d have to catch up on, making her fall behind on the next lesson. Forever catching up, with everyone saying that all you have to do is catch up and everything will be fine.

Everything wasn’t going to be fine though. It was about as far from fine as it could possibly be. Apple Bloom’s life was over, whether or not she wanted to admit it. You can’t fall behind in this cutthroat world; the other kids will get ahead, and they won’t stop running. Apple Bloom rested her head on her hooves, surprised at how wet her face was. Angrily she wiped at her tears. What good was crying going to do? Yet, she just couldn’t hold it in.

Big Macintosh had the courtesy not to make his presence known in her bedroom door, until Apple Bloom’s little fit had passed. “Hey,” he said, making her turn wearily and bleary eyed to face her doorway. “Wanna go look for that clearing?”

“Clearing?” Apple Bloom asked uncomprehendingly.

“The one in your dream,” Big Macintosh clarified. “It was somewhere hearabouts,”

Apple Bloom perked up at that, and nodded, adding, “An’ ah coul’ see the farm houshe from it.”

“If we can find it, then...” he hinted to her.

“Then it mighth shtart to clear up thish myshtery!” Apple Bloom concluded. She jumped to her hooves. No, really, that’s literally how you get to your hooves. She had to rear up in the air and then bounce forward when her front hooves came down, to let her hind ones make their way to their proper places underneath her.

“Better than jus’ moping aroun’ here,” she further agreed.

Together, they went downstairs and headed around behind the farm house, to search through the woods at the west edge of their property. Big Macintosh had to carry Apple Bloom down the stairs, but other than that, she was pretty much under her own power of locomotion the whole time. He had to walk along slowly to allow her to keep up, but still it was... something at least she could do on her own. Apple Bloom needed to cling to every little accomplishment she could get, because they were sure to come rarely from now on, if she didn’t figure out how to stop being a little horse... creature.

The woods were thick and brambly. Amusingly, it was Big Macintosh who had the hardest time fighting through them. Most of the stuff, Apple Bloom could just squeeze under, or climb over. It was... really easy to climb over things. Like a fallen log now giant before her, she thought would be an impassable barrier, but Apple Bloom found she could practically just walk up it and jump off the other side without even breaking a sweat.

“We gone far enough,” Big Macintosh said eventually, interrupting her exploration of her environment, and her abilities within it.

Apple Bloom raised her head in protest, saying, “Bu’ ah think it migh’ be right over–”

“Nope,” he interrupted, “Can’t see the farm house no more.”

Apple Bloom stopped on the rock she was in the process of jumping across, and turned her head around to look at Big Mac, who was himself looking back the way they came, at the featureless woods they came from.

“Bu’ bro,” Apple Bloom whined, pointing a hoof in the direction in front of her, “The farmhoushe ish righ’ over there!”

He turned forward to face her, and beyond her, with a surprised look at the farm house. It was just barely visible through the trees in front of them, but it was definitely there.

“Didn’ we already turhn around a while ago?” Apple Bloom said crabbily.

“Nope...” Big Macintosh said, looking nonplused.

“You jus’ got yourshelf all thurned around,” Apple Bloom said, “Ah remember this ish the way we came. Shee where the bushesh are brokenh?”

Big Mac looked at the bushes, then turned around and scratched his head. He turned back to Apple Bloom agreeing her with a, “Sounds right.” He said in a more serious tone though, “These woods are dangerous. Easy to get turned around in ‘em, and you won’t be able to find your way home.”

“I guess thish meansh we h’caint look for it anymore?” Apple Bloom sighed, her tail drooping a bit from its normal bouncy curl.

“Eyup,” he replied. “Maybe later.”

She just looked at him sadly instead of moving, so he added, “With all of us on the weekend, we can cover a lot more.”

“Yeah it’s jus’...” Apple Bloom looked forward at the farm house, wistfully. “Ah though’ we’d fihnd something.”

Big Macintosh shook his head. “Sorry. Let’s go home.”

Apple Bloom stayed outside once they got back, while Big Macintosh returned to his studies. Well, to be specific he insisted on calling up Applejack, and having her and Granny truck home Apple Bloom’s school supplies, then returned to his studies. Apple Bloom didn’t want to play with the ball anymore, but amused herself by climbing up on the picket fence around their house. She was just hanging onto it and swinging at first, but she managed to get on top of it entirely at one point, tilting her hooves inward to form a sort of four point line. It felt like she was riding the fence on her hands and feet, but when she was like this, she could keep her head up and forward without straining. It was kind of cool.

Apple Bloom didn’t really have anything else to climb on, though. So, eventually she was just sitting there on the ground, flat on her belly, bored stiff, staring grumpily at the swaying grass before her. It reminded her she was getting hungry. That’s what Apple Bloom had been reduced to. Grass makes her hungry. If only Ma and Pa could see her now. She stood up and bent forward, no wait. She stood up and craned her neck down, to reach the grass. It was weird how the more she did that, the more it felt like she was bending forward, instead of just moving her neck. Apple Bloom didn’t really... bend at the waist at all, anymore.

So she craned her neck down, and took a half dozen bites of grass, hesitant at first, but then methodically adding it to her mouth. At least it wasn’t as plain as the alfalfa. Had more of a sharp bite to it, and was lots more juicy. She chuckled at the irony of turning into a horse, right when the grass is going dormant, though it sounded more like a giggle to her ears. Apple Bloom really didn’t know what was up with her voice. It was just so high pitched and funny now!

Some time later, Big Macintosh jogged out of the farm house, up to where Apple Bloom was standing around sounding out random words trying, and failing, to make her voice sound less babyish. She flicked an ear at his approach. Woah, even that was becoming second nature. Apple Bloom turned deliberately, instead of flicking any ears, and gave him a small smile.

“Phone call for you,” Mac said hurriedly. “C’mon inside.”

Now who could be calling Apple Bloom at this hour?

“Hello, Apple Bloom?” the sound of Doctor Stable’s businesslike voice came over the phone speaker.

“Hey dohc!” she said amiably. “What’sh up?”

“I just wanted to let you know,” he said, “I’ve taken the liberty of looking into any local speech therapists. You sound like you could use one, no offense.”

“None tak’n,” Apple Bloom grumbled, offended.

The doctor continued, “At any rate, the best one I could find is in a nearby city. I forwarded my credentials, and asked their opinion on a case such as yours, keeping your identity completely confidential of course. I didn’t get a positive reply so much, but I was asked to forward it to you. You don’t happen to have an e-mail address do you?”

“I go’ a Trotmail,” Apple Bloom offered disinterestedly. Before he took that as a good sign she added, “Ah have to use the school computer to get it, sorry. We ain’t got one at home.”

“I see,” he said discouraged. “May I have it anyway, in case you ever get an opportunity to check?”

She gave him her address, and he wrote it down, then said consolingly, “There really was only one sentence that seemed relevant to you. Would you mind if I read it over the phone?”

Apple Bloom shook her head, even though he wouldn’t be able to see that. “No, that’sh fine,” she told him, curious what the consultant might have said.

“The only thing it says is,” the doc says, then sounds like he’s adjusting his glasses. “Pull back your lips for sale, only purse your lips for shoe. I assume it’s articulatory.” He paused and then clarified, “About your mouth shape when speaking.”

“That’sh–wait... that’sh that’s that’sh oh mah gawsh iht ain’ the thongue at all!”

There was a pause and he said, “...what?”

“Mah lipsh,” Apple Bloom said emphatically. Then corrected herself. “Lips. Ah thoughth ah couldn’ pronounce ess ‘cause mah thongue was weird, but it was mah lips all along. Your shpeech... speech guy ish a geniush! Genius. Who is it?”

There was a pause of a keyboard clicking, and Doctor Stable said, “I’m not personally familiar with the man, but his name is Red Sea. Doctor Sea, I presume. He’s helped a few of my patients with brain or mouth injuries.” Dr. Stable coughed and added, “Or other conditions, no offense.”

“None thaken,” Apple Bloom said, then scrunched her face frustratedly. “Now if ah coul’ only stop sayin’ thhuh instead of tee. Thup–stupid tongue.”

“Shall I set you up for an appointment?” Dr. Stable said. “It is quite a drive, unfortunately.”

“If ah can htalk better, then sure!” Apple Bloom said eagerly. She hesitated and added, “If he don’ mind that ah’m a... y’know...”

“Yes, yes I know: a farmer,” Dr. Stable said kindly, “I’m sure he won’t mind.”

“Hey!”

She definitely heard the doctor snickering over the phone this time.

Dr. Stable said he’d call back if he heard anything from Dr. Sea. Apple Bloom said he could go ahead and give the doctor her phone number and... well, he said beyond that, she’d have to fill out a form if she wanted him to send his medical record of her over there. Fill out a form. Fat chance of that happening. But, at least she could look forward to a phone call from Dr. Sea’s office!

It was only after Apple Bloom hung up the phone that it occurred to her that Dr. Stable had forgotten to give Dr. Sea’s phone number to her. Odd, that. Not worth calling him back though. It wasn’t like Apple Bloom was going to be unavailable to take phone calls any time soon.

When Applejack returned, Apple Bloom and Big Macintosh both ran for the front door, Apple Bloom shouting, “Sis! You’re back! Ah learnedh how ta say ess!” ‘S’ in fact, was one of those letters that was a lot easier to say when you were smiling from ear to ear.

Applejack laughed enthusiastically at that, and said, “That’s great! And you’re movin’ around so well!”

Apple Bloom’s smile fell to a confused frown, as she tried to recall how she moved just now. All she had done was “walk but run,” but it happened... different somehow, all on its own. “Thanks...” Apple Bloom said reservedly, “...ah think.”

“And boy have ah got a treat for you,” Applejack said, sticking her long arm into her backpack and rifling around, pulling out a big sheaf of papers. “Three days worth of homework!”

Apple Bloom groaned, her ears going down at the thought. She definitely felt no need to correct their position or conceal her emotions about homework.

“Yer say that now,” Granny Smith said, walking in behind Applejack, “But just you wait until yer ain’t got nothin’ to do! Then you’ll be beggin’ for home schoolin’!”

“Thanks, Granny,” Apple Bloom agreed, walking up with a welcoming smile and rubbing the side of her face on Granny’s leg. Wait, why did she do that? Apple Bloom pulled back, and blinked at herself.

“It ain’t no problem, Apple Bloom,” Granny said bending down to ruffle Apple Bloom’s hair, “Ah’m always happy teh help ya out.”

“Uh... y-yeah,” Apple Bloom said nervously, keeping herself perfectly still. Why did she do that?

“Ah made a casserole,” Big Macintosh said, smiling at the two new arrivals and carefully added, “It’s all vegetarian.”

Apple Bloom snapped out of her worries to look at her brother disconsolately. “Ah still cain’ eath it,” she said morosely.

Applejack started to say, “You could—” but Apple Bloom interrupted irritably saying,

“Ah don’ wanna jus’ eat hay. It’s boring!” She didn’t add that the smell of the cashew cheddar pepper broccoli squash casserole with thyme and oregano had been torturing her for the last hour it had been cooking. Apple Bloom didn’t want to smell something so delicious, that she couldn’t eat, but she just couldn’t force her family to go without good food, just because she hadn’t gotten used to being a horse yet.

Maybe the hay would taste better this time.

“Sorry sis,” Applejack said kneeling down beside Apple Bloom as Granny strode past to poke around in the kitchen. “But you heard about all that terrible stuff. We gotta play it safe and make sure you have a healthy diet, not a... human one.”

“Ah know, it’s jus’... it’s jus’ hardh is all,” Apple Bloom said, her eyes watering. She really wanted to eat that casserole. But why was she crying over a silly thing like that? “Forget this,” she said grumpily, wiping her eyes off on her hoof again. “Ah’m gonna go eat mah hay.” She wandered in that direction then, ignoring Applejack’s half hearted attempts to console her.

Apple Bloom sort of found she could make the hay sort of taste like that casserole, by smelling while she was eating it. She closed her eyes trying to imagine the stiff fibers as a tasty meal, hoping maybe the smell was enough to make her feel like she was eating good.

It wasn’t.

Apple Bloom ate as much as she comfortably could, then retreated outside, where the smells weren’t so tantalizing. Evening was coming on, the sun getting low in the sky. She looked at it, then walked out of the fenced area the farm house was in, making her way into the trees around it. She traveled a path she’d gone a lot of times before, whenever she wanted to find somewhere to think, and to watch the sunset. It went up a hill that Apple Bloom remembered as being a whole lot steeper than it was, but atop this hill, she could see over the tree line, with her back to the city, looking away to the west where the sun was dipping down to touch the horizon.

Apple Bloom settled down on her feet, sitting like a dog again, then just slid down on her legs until her belly was flattening the rough grass atop the hill she looked over. It was funny how the world looked like a bowl from here, like an upside down fishbowl that the sun slid on top of, on its way across the sky.

The sunset was always striking when you found a spot high enough that you could see that atmospheric effect on the horizon, that made the sun’s disk stretch out and lens into almost a flat line, with the uneven stripes of blue and green tilting off the edges. It lit up the uneven puffy clouds in the sky, in a nonuniform spectrum of reds, greens and oranges as it set, looking finally more like a ring around the earth by the time the last edge of light passed beyond the horizon. Apple Bloom loved sunsets. Just something about them. Sunrises just weren’t as dramatic or spectacular.

The light had fallen to a uniform grey, and the air was cooling fast, so Apple Bloom lifted up her butt and walked forward, tilting down the slope of the hill as she went. She was worried about slipping at first, but her hooves had a pretty good grip, and there were plenty of rocky outcroppings she could anticipate to brace against, if she needed something to stop her from sliding down. She got to the farm house before the stars were out, finding her family turning the place upside down looking for her. ...wait, what?

“Apple Bloom!” Granny announced accusingly, striding up to tower over Apple Bloom like a vengeful ogre, “Yer didn’t say you were gonna be runnin’ off! What if somethin’ happened to ye?!”

“Ah was jus’ watching the sunseth,” Apple Bloom said irritably. “I do thath all the thime!”

“Applejack! Big Mac! Found her!” Granny called over her shoulder. She turned to Apple Bloom then, and knelt ponderously down to the ground, looking her in the eye and saying, “Ye know... you’re right. You didn’t do nothin’ wrong. We’re just all on edge from this, an’ we don’t want ye to go disappearin’ on us.”

Applejack tromped up beside them saying, “Oh, thank heavens Apple Bloom. Where were you?”

“Watching the sunthet,” Apple Bloom said less spiritedly than before. “Ah didn’ mean to make y’all worry.”

“On Promise Peak?” Applejack asked in surprise.

“It’s the betht place to watch it,” Apple Bloom pointed out scuffing her hoof on the ground guiltily.

“Well you need to be more careful, sis,” Applejack said vigilantly, “You coulda fallen an’ we wouldn’t know where you were!”

“It’s a lot harder to fall acthually,” Apple Bloom said holding up a hoof and waving it at Applejack demonstratively. “Four legs, remember?”

“Well, what if a dog had gotten loose and was wanderin’ around the farm?” Applejack suggested nervously. “What would you do then?”

“Ah’d kick him if he came a’ me!” Apple Bloom declared, throwing her hind leg out behind her like a bullet.

“An’ when he bites your hoof?” Applejack countered, squatting down next to Granny.

Apple Bloom frowned. “Then ah’d...” she said, finishing excitedly with, “Kick him with the other leg!”

Nobody was laughing. Apple Bloom’s ears went down. “Ah’ll be more careful...” she admitted languidly. “Won’ go anywhere unthil ah tell sho–someone.”

Big Mac’s broad palm came down on Apple Bloom’s head, ruffling the hair in between her ears. “Just glad you’re safe,” he said warmly.

The family then settled down together, to relax in front of the fire. Applejack talked about her school day, and Apple Bloom didn’t give her a hard time just because she was feeling left out of school. It was fun to hear about Applejack’s crazy friends anyway, especially that firebrand who wore leather around Fluttershy. If Applejack’s opinion was accurate, and it always was, that Sunset Shimmer girl was acting even weirder lately than she usually did.

Huh, Apple Bloom couldn’t help but notice that girl had the word Sunset in her very name. Apple Bloom wondered if she liked sunsets too. At the very least, her parents must have liked sunsets. Applejack’s friends were way out of Apple Bloom’s league though, and gosh darn it now Apple Bloom’s own friends were out of her league. She wondered what it would be like to have Sweetie Belle looking down on her. Apple Bloom was so used to being just about the same size as them. The three of them had all grown up together inch by inch, and now Apple Bloom’s childhood development had just gone straight into left field.

Apple Bloom wondered what her friends were doing. That made her miss them though, and she didn’t like feeling so empty inside. They were probably missing her too, but they all had lives and... all Apple Bloom had was alfalfa. Still, maybe she could figure a way for them to visit her once and a while. If she could ever summon enough courage to face them like this, that is.

Big Macintosh actually did talk a little, though mostly he just prompted Apple Bloom, who recollected the greater portion of their day. At least, of what she knew about their day. About searching out in the west woods, getting the call about the voice doctor, trying to study with Big Macintosh. She skipped talking about the crying part.

“Oh hey, that reminds me!” Applejack said, struggling up from where they were all cuddled around the fireplace. She jogged off, and returned with Apple Bloom’s book bag in her hand, looking just about bursting full. “Ah got your books too, all that ah could, not just your homework,” she explained. “You’ll have to let me know if ah missed anything though.”

Applejack set the bag down beside Apple Bloom, where she laid a hoof on her familiar, if much bigger textbooks in there. “Thanks Applejhack,” Apple Bloom said, her eyes brimming with liquid gratefulness. “Ah just hope ah can live up thoo what they need from me. Ah cain’ even write anymore.”

“One of us can write for you,” Big Macintosh suggested.

Apple Bloom looked at him with disapproval, saying, “Ah cain’ ask you ta do that! You got’ your own work to thake care of.”

“Ah ain’t a pony,” he countered gruffly.

“Oh ah’m a pony now?” Apple Bloom shot back, blushing hotly.

“Too small for a horse,” he pointed out.

“Ah’m too small for a pony!” Apple Bloom declared.

“Fair ‘nuff,” he admitted. “Mini-horse?”

Apple Bloom shook her head, “Nao that don’t sound right, either.”

She didn’t tell him that when he said “pony” it did sound right. Unsettlingly so.

Apple Bloom had a strange dream that night, in fact. She’d settled into her bed, a challenging feat as towering as it was above her, and as horse as she was below it. She hoped she didn’t have to give up sleeping in a bed too. Really, she was desperate for just about anything from her old life that she could still cling to. She may have pulled out her old teddy bear to sleep with. It wasn’t exactly the sort of thing she’d brag about to her friends, but there was something comforting about it tonight.

Apple Bloom felt calmer, with the thing cradled in her little hooves. Little, because she didn’t remember having to stretch that much to wrap her single arm around a football sized doll. It wasn’t much of a stretch, but it was noticeable. Her plush bear went from football sized, to uh... larger than football sized. About the size of a watermelon? One of them big watermelons. Honestly, Apple Bloom was going to say bigger than a bucket, but... the bucket had become bigger too. Apple Bloom didn’t like that. With everything bigger all at once, relatively, it was starting to feel like everything was just normal sized, and that made Apple Bloom feel really, really small.

It’d have been nice if her dream had some detail or clarity to it, instead of just the feeling of rushing forward in a murky darkness. Apple Bloom couldn’t even dream of being human anymore, apparantly, as she was running forward heedlessly on all fours, just like she had been all yesterday. There was something after her. Something terrible. Something huge. She saw a faint light in the distance and she had to reach it, had to get help somehow.

The light expanded as she approached it, but it wasn’t like running out of a tunnel. It was like a lens coming into focus, that she passed through like a curtain of water. Apple Bloom stopped short in shock, at a glorious starscape. It was not just above her, but below her, and all around. She was still walking somehow, despite nothing to walk on, and as she did, she started to perceive a geometry to this strange place. It wasn’t as large as it seemed. It was like the stars were a projection on a small and cozy space, a sphere in which Apple Bloom walked, as though an invisible platform were stretching across its expanse. Some sort of planetarium?

What drew her attention was something that wasn’t a star. A little bright lavender blob that resolved itself, as Apple Bloom neared it in the center of the sphere. It was some kind of horse, just like the way she was! Some kind of thing like her, except this one was so much more... magical, somehow. She seemed more like the ocean tides, or a storm front than a physical being. She was sitting perfectly still on her belly, neither breathing nor blinking, her unflinching gaze on something laid before her, cradled gently on her relaxed forehooves.

It was a book.

Apple Bloom had to ask. It was just too weird to not ask about it. Her voice sounded echoey, as she curiously asked this purple horse of nature, “What’cha readin’?”

There was no response. Apple Bloom felt nervousness creep into the edges of her awareness. Was Apple Bloom the only horse whe could talk? Was she just talking to a statue? Some kind of horse shaped doll? Apple Bloom was just about to give up, but she half jumped out of her skin, when the purple horse startled into motion. It was scary because the horse’s hair flared up, somehow, just a little. Her head only tilted down just a fraction of an inch though, looking at the book as if for the first time.

“I’ve forgotten,” the creature said, in a very puzzled tone of voice, as if she didn’t believe it herself. As if a magical horse being sitting there, reading a book full of weird hieroglyphs wasn’t unbelievable enough. It was the voice of a woman that came forth from this equine being, a strangely familiar voice at that. One Apple Bloom couldn’t quite place. The lady mare didn’t say anything more, just staring off into the distance, and Apple Bloom felt rushed, as if she was on a time limit here.

“What are you?” Apple Bloom asked hastily. She qualified with, “Ah mean, what kinda horse are ...ya?” Apple Bloom almost said ‘we’ she almost did. It didn’t look like the horse lady was going to respond again, but this time, Apple Bloom just had to guess that this strange being was something that took a long time to respond. What she didn’t expect was how that strange being was going to respond.

“I’m not a horse, I’m a pony.” the lady mare said abruptly, turning to Apple Bloom with a calm smile beneath her vivid, violet eyes. Her smile froze then, even more than it had before. Apple Bloom felt chilly as the lady mare stared at her disconcertingly, the mare’s irises narrowing expressively, and her body stiffening up as her face dropped into something between wonder and shock.

“You’re a pony!” the lady mare exclaimed, surging to her four legs. They collapsed under her then, and she fell on her side, still staring at Apple Bloom exclaiming, “You’re a pony!” The sphere felt like it was closing in around them. Apple Bloom tried not to recall what had been lurking outside. She backed up in terror as the lady mare stretched a hoof towards her, the very air rippling and going fuzzy and indistinct, as she shouted again, “You’re a pony!”

“Ah’m not a pony!” Apple Bloom cried out miserably, covering her head in her hooves. Because she had hooves. Because she was a pony. Everything seemed to be pressing in around her. The whispering wail of a soundless wind crashed around her as the lady mare continued heedless, her voice coming from all around as she said, “You’re a pony! You’re a pony!”

“Ah’m a girl!” Apple Bloom shouted against the raging storm, desperately. The mare’s increasingly frantic cries fell silent, then. Had Apple Bloom scared her off?

The mare was abruptly looming in her face. “Find me!” she near shrieked only half coherently. There was a crazy look in her eyes as she shouted, “You have to find me! Hurry! Find me!”

Apple Bloom inhaled sharply, as she woke up like a wrecking ball. She heard the voice then, echoing beyond an impossible distance, crying out, “Save me!” Apple Bloom lurched up from her pillow, her little yellow hooves holding the blankets over on top of her in a death grip. Even though she didn’t have anything to grip with. Apple Bloom’s ears turned left and right as she breathed hard in the silence, but there were no more voices, no more craziness or panicked entreaties.

Apple Bloom’s bed was dissheveled. She must have been thrashing about an awful lot. Her bear had gotten kicked off it entirely and was laying forlornly on the floor. Apple Bloom scooted to the edge of her bed, and stuck her back hooves over the edge of it, slipping off of it backwards to join her bear, as a pile of pony on the floor. Apple Bloom knew exactly who to blame for all this. Climbing to her feet, it still felt weird to stand up straight by only standing up halfway, but Apple Bloom didn’t have any trouble walking across her room. She walked across her room in a daze, through the door they left propped open for her, and on down the hallway.

There, she hammered on Big Macintosh’s bedroom door, shouting through it at him, “Ya gave me a bad dhream you hlunkhead! Ah tol’ you ah’m hnot a pony!”

The sounds of movement within resolved themselves as his door swung open, bringing her face-to-face with those ridiculous slippers. She looked up at him, and said a little less angrily and more apologetically, “Ah need you ta write something for me. Ah hadh a dream again, like the one before.” Even Apple Bloom was surprised at how quickly he spun around, and snatched up a writing utensil and some loose paper from his desk. But soon he was ready for her.

She tried to recall it, and–she was already starting to forget it! Stupid dreams! She was... the lady mare was, yeah some purple po–horse thing just like her. How had she found the mare? Something about stars? Something...

“Somethin’ was chasing me,” Apple Bloom said feeling a chill at the memory of that, “And ah foun’ a big ball of stars. Like a room, but it was shpherical an’ had stars all over ith. An’ there was a po–p–a whatever I am in the middle of it. She was real pretty, and all—I dunno—magical and starry and stuff. She was colored like a human not a horse, jus’ like me, ‘cept she was purple, and ah’m yellow and red. She was distracted by something... by a book, right, and ah asked her about it before I would wake up. She kept tellin’ me ah was a...”

...

“A...?” Big Macintosh prompted, causing Apple Bloom to blush again, and turn her head aside. She was sitting in his room on the floor, with him up in his desk chair, and he was writing down her words on some paper pinned to a clipboard.

Apple Bloom turned back to face him and reluctantly admitted, “She said ah was a ...pony.” To his credit, Big Macintosh’s only reaction was a snort, and the scratch of pencil on paper.

“She kept sayin’ it though,” Apple Bloom continued, “Not like she was tellin’ me, but like she was surprised, like she was tellin’ herself! And then ah started to wake up, but she shouted that ah needed to find her. And... save her, ah think. And then ah woke up.”

He finished writing silently, and Apple Bloom started to speculate, a little excitement rising in her as she did. “Ah think it might have been an alien princess!” Apple Bloom uttered admittedly gushing a little, “Maybe from mah home planet! And she needs me ta save it!”

Big Mac started to write that, but stopped then, and looked down at Apple Bloom with a wry stare. “You been readin’ too many comic books, sis,” he teased her amusedly.

Author's Note

This was a long one... went a long time before finishing it too. Hopefully didn't get too far off track.
Spoiler alert
(Not really.)

Unstable Equilibrium

Apple Bloom wished she could have said the day with Applejack went any differently than the day with Big Macintosh. She wished she could say that her sister found the clearing, and they uncovered the secret of the evil wizard or space horse princesses, or whatever was causing this. But in the end, it was just another day of kicking around the ball, and growing increasingly disgusted with eating hay. Especially when it came out the other end. Apple Bloom hated that about being a horse the most, she figured. There were other problems, but that really took the cake, for the first few days at least.

Or the horse pie, as such the case may be.

It was nice at least that Applejack brought her school textbooks back. Apple Bloom needed something to do, even if reading terribly dry textbooks was all she could think of. Though, a lot of them seemed even less relevant to her now, if that were possible.

Algebra for instance, was all about solving and simplifying, and that was all stuff you did on paper, with a pencil, held in your hand. English again, it wasn’t any more fun to learn how to speak correctly when you had a new mouth to deal with, on top of being an uneducated hick stuck on the farm all day, who didn’t even get to be a high school graduate. Apple Bloom never thought she’d miss Ms. Harshvoice’s presence, but it turns out talking to yourself, instead of in class, is a lot less fun. Biology was great, and she read everything that textbook had to say about horses, and about the coloring of human skin. French was just impossible though; 90% of that class was sounding things out to each other in class, and not reading the slim and summarily unhelpful textbook. Though, a bilingual horse, that’d have to be a first.

Her family seemed to get comfortable with her transformation relatively quickly. There was always that uncomfortable smile whenever they were reminded of yet another thing she could no longer do, but they never judged her for it. In particular Applejack, not on the first day but two days afterwards spent a lot of time with Apple Bloom. It was getting embarassing at one point. Apple Bloom had to practically shove her out the door, just so her sister would find something to do with herself. Applejack was used to keeping busy, always doing something, and when she was stuck taking care of Apple Bloom, then that ‘something’ invariably became hovering over her like a mother hen. Applejack was just trying to make sure Apple Bloom didn’t have any problems, but just making more problems in the first place!

There was little interest from the media on Apple Bloom’s transformation. Canterlot had always been a pretty laid back town. The one news station they did have already did its piece on her, and didn’t really seem interested in day-to-day updates on the thrilling taste of hay. Either the world news never got wind of it, or didn’t care. She honestly couldn’t imagine why anyone would be interested in a girl changing into a horse, so long as it wasn’t happening to them or anything. And since Apple Bloom had been thoroughly housebound, that meant nobody ever happened to see her anyway. As far as Apple Bloom was concerned, the fewer people who saw her as a tiny little buck naked horse, the better.

Oh, for that matter, on the fourth day, Apple Bloom was practicing her important “rolling on the grass because I’m so damn bored”, when she heard Applejack approaching from inside the house. Groaning, Apple Bloom addressed her sister upside-down, from belly up there on the ground. “No ah’m no’ hungry,” Apple Bloom lied. “No ah’m not tired,” she lied. “And no ah don’ need any help!” she... lied.

“Aw don’t be like that lil’ sis,” Applejack said in a tone of disappointment. “Stand up so ah can get your measurements.”

“Measuremenths?” Apple Bloom said curiously, tilting her head back to actually look at her sister. Applejack was holding onto a flexible measuring thingy, a long flat tape with numbers and tick marks all along it. It was the sort of thing you’d see in a fashionist’s hands. It looked out of place in an athlete’s.

“Yeah, ah got a ...pattern,” Applejack said, folding her hands holding the tape behind her, insecurely. “Was thinkin’ ah could use some of mah time to make you a little something.”

Apple Bloom was on her feet in an instant, and zipped over, bracing her hooves on Applejack’s thigh looking up at her eagerly. “You mean clothing?!” Apple Bloom exclaimed breathlessly.

Applejack laughed and reached down to rumple Apple Bloom’s hair. “You got it,” she said reassuringly. “Ah’m not real good at makin’ anything fancy, but ah figured it couldn’t hurt to give it a shot. Mah friend even loaned me one of her sewin’ machines.”

“Rarity, righ’?” Apple Bloom prompted, backing up from Applejack to clip down on all fours.

“That’s right,” Applejack agreed. “Ah’d have asked her to do it herself, but well, she don’t exactly... know, y’know. About all this.”

“Y-you can tell her,” Apple Bloom said uncomfortably, turning self consciously and ending up looking at her tail, which curled towards her the other way.

“Ah tried!” Applejack said in an exasperated tone. “She don’t believe me.”

Apple Bloom uncurled to look up at Applejack again, puzzled. “But what about the TV news?” she asked, “She didn’t see ith–see it?”

“Rarity is... something else, sometimes,” Applejack said dispiritedly, “She thinks it’s all a big hoax that ah’m pullin’ on her. Ah tried to, but– ah mean– she’s so sensitive about the littlest thing. Ah didn’t want to send her into a panic.”

“What abou’ your other friends?” Apple Bloom asked seriously.

“Ain’t asked them,” Applejack said quietly, looking away this time, herself. It made Apple Bloom’s heart hurt to see her sister so disconsolate. Apple Bloom understood where Applejack was coming from though, and how she was feeling. Apple Bloom certainly hadn’t asked Applejack to tell her friends about it, either. She didn’t know what Sweetie Belle would think, maybe panic as she’s Rarity’s sister and all. Or more likely not panic, because she knew how to deal with craziness, as she’s Rarity’s sister and all. It was Scootaloo Apple Bloom would be more worried about, honestly. Sweetie was so much better at taking things in stride.

Matter of fact, the one she was really worried seeing about was that new friend of theirs, Diamond Tiara. You wouldn’t think Diamond would be a problem, but something was really shaking that poor girl, last time Apple Bloom saw her, and it was at the start of all this horse nonsense, too.

Tiara was a character for sure. She seemed both unflappable, and yet strangely vulnerable in some aspect. Kind of like her name, diamonds are the hardest substance on earth, but if you held them under a candle flame they’ll eventually burn to smoke. But yeah, so Apple Bloom was glad Diamond Tiara wasn’t around. She’d either make fun of her for being this way, or freak out, or ...something.

Applejack measured Apple Bloom as best as she could, trying, and failing, to reveal that what she had found was a cutout pattern for silly pet clothes. Then Applejack got to work, and well... at least she didn’t burn the house down. It looked like Apple Bloom was going to have to wait a while, to get any sort of decency in her life. Apple Bloom tried to console her sister, and say it was no big deal, and they’d just get new curtains, and it’d have been fine... but Apple Bloom sorely needed some consoling herself.

Apple Bloom tried to look on the bright side. If there was a bright side. It wasn’t that bad, is the thing! She still had her wits. She wasn’t an invalid or anything, just sort of missing her hands, and having a lot harder time with going to the bathroom. Horses suck, in that regard. At least... she wasn’t supposed to be an invalid, but the dreariness just started to ...get to her. No matter how she tried to keep her spirits up, Apple Bloom just stopped being able to find it in her to be happy anymore. Her life was over. Dragging herself around, feeling empty inside all the time, and terribly lonely. Her family loved her, and she loved them but, it wasn’t enough somehow. She was missing something terribly.

It didn’t help that every dish her family cooked was absolute torture. Apple Bloom actually began to dread dinnertime, and took to sitting on the hill outside her property, for the period of time that her family was eating. She loved them and all, but when they were eating, she just couldn’t stand the smell. It was all Apple Bloom could do to keep herself from lunging at the table like a hungry panther.

It helped once she started eating dinner outside, but it still bothered her like crazy. And, truth be told it was hurting her a lot more than she realized. Thankfully, Apple Bloom had guardian angels watching over her. Two to be specific. Two very foolish guardian angels, watching over her from a distant tree at the edge of her property, with the help of some purloined telescopic binoculars, and camera equipment.

“Subject remains on hilltop Promise Peak,” Twilight Sparkle announced to the scratching of a pencil on paper behind her. “Assumes a supine position.” She pulled away from the binoculars to check her watch. “Time is 18:27,” she announced, putting the binoculars to her eyes again. Twilight wore an improvised leaf hat to camoflage her natural colors against the tree foliage. It kept falling down over her eyes, but she easily pushed it up to resume her unflinching vigil.

Twilight looked away again, over to check the timepiece wrapped around the narrowed joint her upper forehoof had become, which humans gave the special name of a ‘wrist.’ Ironic that these human beings would name their own body part after the object that covered it, but nevertheless, with the wristwatch securely on her ‘wrist’ Twilight announced going back to her binoculars again, “Assumes a lupine position, time is 18:34.”

Twilight noticed the pencil scratching had stopped, and once again had the irritating experience of being unable to angle her ears to verify what she heard, without having to turn and face it. But such is the consequence of a vastly altered biology, of a singularly unique species, of whom Twilight really should not have been a member at all. So she tolerated the inconvenience, looking away from her binoculars.

The purple girl was balanced precariously in the tree, adjacent to the mounting for an advanced electronical camera, one that even now was recording the Apple family household (the Apple family of this world) in high definition, several times a second. It was a feat Twilight would have thought impossible, before having seen it in action. From up at that vantage point, Twilight Sparkle looked down at her only friend in the world.

“I said,” Twilight repeated clearly, “Assumes a lupine position, time is 18:34.”

Below her, the indomitable Sunset Shimmer stood with tresses of flame falling on a black leather jacket, next to the tree and next to the collector equipment for this camera’s electronical ‘film’. According to Sunset, an electrical substance vibrated from that camera through metal wires into a boxy looking collector machine. The wires were trailing down from Twilight in the tree, to dangle beside the fiery haired girl Sunset, who was looking up at Twilight with a disgusted expression. Not only had the Sunset stopped writing, but the hand holding the clipboard, and the hand holding the pencil, were both braced on separate hips. It was a gesture that Twilight felt, with her unfamiliar instincts, was very disapproving.

Twilight exclaimed, “Why aren’t you writing—” and Sunset chose that moment to interrupt tetchily,

“This is stupid.”

Sunset Shimmer took her hands from either side of her denim jeans, and crossed them, across her repulsive cow skin jacket. At least this was a gesture of discontent that wasn’t totally alien to Twilight’s experience, albeit not one ponies adopted often.

“What do you mean?” Twilight called down, feeling hurt inside, despite what she knew of her friend’s nature, and her situation. The leaf hat fell over her eyes.

“We are getting nowhere!” Sunset shouted up at her. “Apple Bloom is a pony. She remains a pony. There is no reason she should be a pony. We have learned nothing else, from watching her for the past two days!”

“Well, if we could just talk to her,” Twilight shouted in pleading protest, fighting with her unruly headgear.

“You know we can’t!” Sunset shouted back. “We could ruin the whole thing if our influence determines the outcome!”

“We have to do something,” Twilight called back. “The facture isn’t expanding on its own!”

Sunset looked down at her clipboard, then just threw it aside with a clatter. She faced up again with a surprisingly level look in her eyes, saying tiredly, “Just... come down from there, and let’s try to figure something out again, based on what we know.”

Twilight Sparkle climbed down from the tree. She didn’t fall this time, because she had at least 2 days practice of climbing trees, and of climbing this tree in particular. The rope ladder Sunset set up for her also helped matters. When down, Twilight took a moment to review the footage. When the camera captured the image of Apple Bloom, the distortion around her was obvious, but still no different than the day before. It appeared as an overexposure to the camera film, due to the bipartial velocity superluminal particles that—it appeared as a faint white aura around Apple Bloom, that vaguely conformed to the girl’s shape... her pony shape. It should have been rapidly fractalizing, but... it was just sitting there. Flowing around her like an ill fitting suit.

“Alright,” Twilight said, pausing the superfast slideshow these humans invented, and turning to Sunset Shimmer with a grim look on her face. “What we know is, five days ago a filly known as Apple Bloom found the Golden Apple, and as far as we can tell it’s the real deal, not anything we suggested to her. Subsequent to this discovery, she, for some reason, transformed into a pony, even though ponies do not even exist in this world.”

“There are many myths and legends,” Sunset offered speculatively.

“Yes, myths... unsubstantiated, at that,” Twilight grumbled unsatisfactorily. “Still, it has definitely been a very long time since ponies existed in this world. Yet here Apple Bloom is, as much a pony as she is back home. It has to have something to do with the Golden Apple. I just know it!” Twilight stomped, frustrated, and ineffectively with her weak foreleg, and sideways against the side of the tree. Right, the human word was ‘punched’ not ‘stomped.’

“The Greeks bear a strong parallel to the ancient Sheep empire,” Sunset pointed out, while Twilight shook out her hand hissing in pain. “Perhaps this world’s Tambelon...”

That drew Twilight up short. “Don’t even joke about that,” Twilight said edgily.

Sunset pondered, “So, she dreams up the Golden Apple, turns into a pony, and then what, nothing?” She leaned agaist the tree, hunching her shoulders. “Could the apple have just been a setup? Just an unrelated party trick, and there’s no way to break it after all?”

“There’s no reason to get pessimistic just yet,” Twilight asserted fiercely. “The key is in the lock, and we just have to figure out how to turn the Celestia damned thing.”

Sunset raised an eyebrow. Twilight sniffed unsorrily, and blithely replied, “It’s not vulgarity, when Princess Celestia really does damn it.”

Sunset laughed coarsely. “Whatever you say, princess,” she asserted emphatically.

Despite Twilight’s blush, the purple girl continued to grind her mental gears. “Alright, what do we know about the dream itself?” Twilight prompted.

Sunset cast her eyes down at that, saying, “Not much. I haven’t been able to get much out of Applejack, without... skewing the results.”

Twilight smiled at Sunset somewhat sadly. Twilight couldn’t even comprehend what Sunset has been through all this time. She lay her articulated hoof on Sunset’s shoulder, and just gave it a warm squeeze. Twilight couldn’t help but notice that for such a horrifying product, it was a very comfortable feeling jacket. Sunset smiled, but didn’t otherwise acknowledge Twilight, or even look at her. Instead the flame haired girl said,

“The odd thing isn’t the dream, but how my other friend reacted to it.”

“Rarity,” Twilight agreed in understanding, taking her hand back to herself.

“Rarity knew about the Golden Apple too, through her kid sister,”

“Sweetie Belle,” they said simultaneously. Not in triumph, but just from knowing it previously, as an obvious fact.

“But how did Sweetie Belle learn about it?” Twilight wondered. “Apple Bloom must have told her. Oh, if only we had that conversation!”

Sunset started to nod, then blinked. “Wait, you know,” she said unsurely, “Sweetie also knew Apple Bloom was a pony. Rarity said as much, that her sister must have guessed it from the ‘tabloid’ news, but how could she have known how big Apple Bloom was going to be?”

“Apple Bloom’s other friend might have been involved too,” Twilight suggested. “What do we know about her?”

“Which one, Diamond Tiara or Scootaloo?” Sunset asked curiously.

Twilight visibly flinched at that. “Sorry,” she said with a bashful smile, “I keep forgetting this world’s Apple Bloom is very different from our own.”

“She seems like a decent, bright filly in both worlds,” Sunset said pensively. “I wouldn’t mind meeting her one of these days... ours, I mean.”

Twilight nodded, diverting the topic tactfully, “Now, Diamond Tiara on the other hand, I don’t know what that filly’s problem is on our world. You know, she once made the whole town think Spike thought I was a snob?”

“Spike? Really?” Sunset asked disbelievingly. “He doesn’t even think Rarity is a snob!”

“Hope he’s doing alright back at the er, hideout,” Twilight said nervously.

Meanwhile, back at the house for sale they broke into, with a loud clatter the failure of an omelette went flying in several directions around the room. “Why can’t I have opposable thumbs?” Spike’s voice could be heard in a mournful howl, “Why does this universe hate me?”

“Anyway,” Sunset cut in, meanwhile, back at the ranch, “So we know that Sweetie might maybe know something. It might be safe to mess with her a little bit... but she can’t know we’re doing it, because she’ll tell Rarity, and Rarity will tell Applejack, and then we’re busted.”

“All this secrecy is terrible,” Twilight grouched, “But... you’re right. We have to be subtle about this. Either for her, or for Scootaloo.”

“Or Diamond Tiara,” Sunset added.

Twilight shook her head bemusedly, “It still surprises me how similar, but how different these two worlds are. You know in my world, Scootaloo is an orphan? Yet here, the tables are turned, and she’s Cheerilee’s biological daughter. Makes me wonder if there’s something the Cheerilee from our world isn’t telling us.”

Sunset gave a lively laugh at Twilight’s speculative drawl, but then Sunset stopped, mid-laugh, with a look of realization. Twilight asked hopefully, “Did you figure something out?”

“Applejack called me about this,” Sunset said thoughtfully, “It was a change, so I paid attention, and she wanted Cheerilee’s phone number. And then, she called again saying Cheerilee thought she was pranking her.”

“So, I... really don’t follow,” Twilight said unsurely.

“You know Cheerilee was complaining the other day, about a prank caller telling her that Scootaloo had horse ears?”

“Right, based on the news broadcast...” Twilight said agreeably.

“No that’s just it,” Sunset exclaimed, “I think she was talking about Applejack’s phone call, not a real prankster!”

Twilight hummed, “So, Applejack must have called Cheerilee and warned her that Scootaloo was changing into a pony?”

“Why would she only call her though?” Sunset insisted. “Why only Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo?”

“And not...” Twilight said in realization.

“Diamond Tiara!” they both exclaimed.

“Those three must be special in both worlds!” Twilight exclaimed excitedly.

“But they didn’t change into ponies!” Sunset shot back equally excitedly. “Why would she be saying they did?”

“They have to have something in common!” Twilight declared. “Some reason Applejack would think to contact those two, but not all of Apple Bloom’s friends.”

“And that reason is...” Sunset trailed off, arms spread dramatically.

“...” Twilight answered equally awkwardly.

Sunset let her arms drop. “You know what, I just need to talk to them again. I’ll talk to Rarity, and see if I can pick her brain any more, without ruining it for her. She believes it to be a hoax anyway, so it should be easy to get her to open up.”

“Yes, that’s probably the best idea,” Twilight said agreeably. “You go talk... to Rarity...” she drooped at the thought of that, and sighed fitfully. This time it was Sunset’s hand on her own shoulder providing that human measure of support.

“We’ll get your friends back too,” Sunset said with a sloppy smile, “Come on, you’re here. Princess Twilight Sparkle. You don’t think Celestia sent you here, because she didn’t think you were going to come back, do you? We’re going to figure this out, and we’re going to fix everything.”

“Thanks... Sunset,” Twilight said, clasping her hand in hers softly. “You know, I don’t know what I’d do if at least one of my friends weren’t right here with me, going through all this.”

Sunset Shimmer blushed, and for a rare moment in time, she didn’t have any words to say.

It wouldn’t be exactly right to say that Sunset Shimmer looked forward to meeting with Rarity. Sunset had always been a pony who thrived on conflict and adversity, even when she was not a pony. She stared down the rather dingy looking apartment complex she walked towards with a keen sense of anticipation. It was best to catch Rarity off guard, or she would get you involved in one of her own crazy endeavors. Sunset really wondered how the real Rarity... how the other Rarity could be anywhere near as fashion obsessed as hers was.

One thing Rarity remained ashamed of, was her living arrangements, though Sunset couldn’t fathom why. Sunset had used it to humiliate her in the past, but it was also a good way to get past Rarity’s defenses and get her to open up, instead of letting Rarity float around like the social butterfly she wished she could be.

So, well after school, Sunset Shimmer rang the doorbell to Rarity’s apartment. The hallway leading to the apartments was brown and nondescript, but Rarity’s was easily identifiable by the bedazzling she applied to the just-about-everything. It was unusually restrained for Rarity, in fact, just a pattern of sparkling plastic stickers applied around the peephole, turning it into a feature of the door instead of a veiled threat. It made it really easy to find her apartment, though Sunset had long since memorized the exact number and floor.

There was a familiar shouting match that happened, once the door buzzer sounded inside. It looked like this one was going to be a “prove yourself”, for these two. Sunset calculably smiled, as the lock was undone and a girl with candy curled hair close to Sunset’s human age, but some years younger than Sunset, Sweetie Belle opened the apartment door.

Sweetie Belle was one Sunset wasn’t especially familiar with, except through her connection with Rarity, but there wasn’t a human in school that Sunset didn’t know inside and out. This younger girl was the sort who loved every opportunity to take charge, and Sweetie Belle clearly knew the power she held in having a sister who enjoyed long time consuming soaks in the bathtub, answering the door despite Rarity’s protests, protests which fell embarassingly silent the moment the door opened.

Gusto aside, when Sweetie Belle saw Sunset standing there, like a hawk about to descend upon its prey, the younger girl shrank back and said nothing, not even introducing herself, clearly regretting being the first to make it to the door. Sunset put on as friendly a face as she could manage these days. “Hey there,” she said to Sweetie, leaning on the doorjam, “I’m Rarity’s friend, Sunset Shimmer. She might have told you about me?”

Sweetie relaxed a bit, but still gave Sunset a long look before asking, “Would you like to speak to Rarity?” in that darling voice of hers. The voice that made Sunset want to jump on her and squeeze her cheeks, because you’d have to be a demonic monster to not feel that way when Sweetie Belle spoke to you. Sunset instead nodded calmly and answered,

“Yeah, I’d appreciate it if you could tell her I’m here. If she’s not too busy, that is.”

“One moment,” Sweetie said politely, turning and closing the door behind her. That didn’t stop the sounds of frantic movement from within, when Rarity herself entered the front of her apartment. Rarity pulled open the door, to reveal herself in a long fuzzy white bathrobe, with her dripping hair wrapped up in a personally embroidered towel.

“Sunset!” Rarity said entirely too cheerfully, “What a surprise to see you here! I wasn’t aware that you... knew where I lived.”

“Word gets around,” Sunset said noncommitally, with a casual shrug.

“I... I’m terribly sorry I was not prepared, if you’ll just give me a moment to put my face on,” Rarity said in a fluster. “Sweetie Belle is... visiting you see, and I had just paused for a moment to—”

“No, no don’t worry about it,” Sunset said waving her hand, “I just had a quick question to ask you. It’s about a research project I’ve been working on about Greek mythology. You remember how Sweetie Belle was going on about a Golden Apple?”

Rarity smiled wanly, saying, “I do recall, yes. Among other foolish things.”

Sunset pressed on, saying, “It’s a story you might like, actually. Basically, at a royal wedding, that all the gods attended, a goddess inscribed the name ‘to the most beautiful’ on an apple made of solid gold, then tossed it amid all the other gods. Naturally all of them assumed it was in reference to herself, and the resulting argument over who was the fairest resulted in the uh... Trojan war. A total war that devastated Greek society.”

“Now why on earth would she do that?!” Rarity exclaimed, a hand to her chest aghast. “Beauty is not a thing to be tossed around like a bauble or a trinket!”

“She wasn’t invited to the wedding, I gather,” Sunset shrugged.

“Well that’s no reason to—”

“Yeah, I know!” Sunset cut in. “Most mythology doesn’t make sense that way. Look, think of it this way, there was a big war where a lot of people suffered, and everyone wanted someone to blame for it, but nobody could blame the people who caused it because those people had all the power. So they did what they usually do, make up gods to blame for it.”

“I cannot imagine anyone would fight so bitterly, over something so trivial,” Rarity persisted somewhat mournfully.

“Wouldn’t you want to be the most beautiful?” Sunset asked testily.

Rarity smiled at Sunset, as one does to an uppity child. The ironic thing is, that didn’t even phase Sunset anymore. It was just something Rarity did without even thinking about it. She did it to just about everyone, in fact.

“Sunset, darling,” Rarity said melodically, “Beauty isn’t something you can prove, or claim. If you have to prove you are the most beautiful, then you are not the most beautiful. Simple as that! Why, I would be fighting to make someone else take that apple. Whoever needed an apple before anyone would think they were beautiful, would be most ugly indeed.”

Rarity paused, and added, “If that was your question, then I suppose I will retire to my afternoon soak?”

Sunset found herself a little tongue tied. She wasn’t used to Rarity being so darned... insightful! “Alright, no,” she pinched her brow collecting her wits. “I was researching it because of that news report, you know the one with that local girl, Apple Bloom?”

Rarity rolled her eyes, drawling out, “Please don’t tell me you watch that tripe, either!”

Sunset smiled loosely, saying, “Hey, you know me. Crazy stories are my bread and butter. I was wondering what you thought about it. Apple Bloom is your sister’s friend, isn’t she?”

“What I think,” Rarity said angrily, “Is Applejack is making a huge mistake, pulling Apple Bloom out of school for a, for what amounts to a prank of all things. You think you know someone, and then she does something like this! Where has my good, decent, honest friend gone, wrapped up in all that media hype?! How much do you think they’re paying her to lie to us all!”

Sunset’s eyes went from side to side, because to look forward now was to look at Rarity, who had come nose-to-nose with Sunset. Rarity’s angry, forward facing eyes were focused right on the target of her wrath, an abstract concept. Sunset just happened to be standing in the way of it. That’s what it felt like at least. Then, Rarity realized she was being ...forward, and straightened up, collecting herself and adjusting the towel on her head.

“I haven’t anything to say about that sordid article,” Rarity said snippily. “Except that I would appreciate if you could be so kind as to tell Applejack that she needs to pull her head out of her rear end, and send Apple Bloom back to school where she belongs, and stop ruining the poor girl’s future like this.”

“Yeah, alright I’ll... do what I can,” Sunset said unhappily. Rarity smiled silently, and closed the door to her apartment. Sunset stood there in the hallway, rolling around Rarity’s words in her head, trying to find some hint of what Rarity knew, about how Sweetie Belle might be connected to Apple Bloom, and the Golden Apple. Rarity hadn’t said that Sweetie had any strange dreams, and didn’t seem to even slightly connect the old legend with her sister. Yet she learned about the apple through her sister, so Sweetie had to know about it somehow.

Groaning, Sunset leaned against the wall of the hallway, scrunching her hands up in her hair. She listened to the slosh of bathwater inside, and the pleasant sound of Rarity’s close lipped humming, as she got about her important bathing ritual. Sunset Shimmer knew she was so close to an answer, but her leads were slipping out through the fingers that she still hadn’t gotten used to, even after all this time. Even after all this fighting. Sometimes Sunset Shimmer didn’t even know what she was fighting for. Her family? As if. Her home? Changed beyond recognition. The arrival of that purple princess was evidence enough that Sunset had nopony waiting for her back home. So why did she still fight?

When it all came down to the wire, there was one thing Sunset Shimmer wanted more than anything in the world. An end. She wanted this all to end so much that it drove her insane. And then drove her sane again. She was so tired of this thrice damned bizarre dimension of bizarre creatures and rituals and that Celestia bucking school! She—

Sunset’s heart skipped a beat and she inhaled sharply, when the door to Rarity’s apartment opened again. Standing up straight, Sunset found herself looking at Sweetie Belle again, the pink and lavender curl girl peering out at Sunset worriedly.

“Oh good, you’re still here,” Sweetie Belle said, with a look of relief. Sunset... had nothing she could say to that. What the buck was going on here?

“Listen,” Sweetie said urgently, “I know Apple Bloom is a little baby animal now. You don’t have to lie to me. I already know, so you don’t have to hide her from me.”

“Wh–huh?” Sunset said intelligently.

“The dream,” Sweetie Belle said. “I saw her changed all the way, in that dream we had, when she touched the golden apple. So please, Rarity won’t tell her, but you have to tell Apple Bloom that it’s okay and she doesn’t have to hide from me. I don’t mind at all, and I... really miss her.”

“I can... talk to Applejack... about...” Sunset said in an almost paralytic grip of terrified reticence.

“Please,” Sweetie said with a soulful pout, “Scootaloo was in the dream too, so Apple Bloom doesn’t have to hide from her either.

“Sweetie Belle!” came Rarity’s voice echoing through the walls, “Who are you talking to?”

“Gotta go,” Sweetie Belle said hastily, closing the door in Sunset’s face. Sweetie opened it again and repeated, “Tell Applejack I really mean it.” Then closed the door.

Sunset didn’t waste one more second, but turned around and ran full tilt out of the hallway, down the stairwell and out the front lobby to the street below. She was breathing hard when she got to the bus stop, leaning on her knees with a wheezy exhaustion, but there was a fiery light in her eyes, if not of triumph, a light of desperate hope, of possibility.

Sometime later in that dingy apartment, which was much less dingy on the inside, Rarity was brushing out her luxurious hair, expertly conditioned into stylish squiggles. Sweetie Belle spoke up in a most curious tone, from the homework she was working on, laid out on the apartment floor.

“Rarity,” she asked offhandedly, “Why does your friend Sunset Shimmer keep introducing herself to me? We already met like twice!”

The weekend came for Apple Bloom, and it was the worst weekend ever. She had a whole life of weekends now, and nothing to do in it. She just lay around all day, not moving much, staring listlessly out the window. She wanted to forget what she was, pretend she was just a normal girl again, who could eat normal things, and do normal things and... she really didn’t have the energy to think on it, further than that. It was almost hay time for her. She hated hay time. No, that’s not quite right. She didn’t even feel like taking the effort to hate it. Fortunately, her life was about to improve in more ways than one.

Her first surprise was when Big Macintosh got back from slopping the pigs, those forbidden walking bacon factories that had no right to look as happy as they did, hanging on to all that tasty meat. The time Apple Bloom thought he’d been studying the past days, he was actually busy with something else entirely. So she lifted her head and turned to look, as he walked down the stairs from his room, holding some kind of white cloth in his enviously large, capable hands. He looked at Apple Bloom, and she looked at him dully.

And he said, “Need ya to try this on, see if it fits.”

Apple Bloom couldn’t scramble to her useless hooves fast enough. “You made it?!” she exclaimed incoherently, running up to him in broad jumps, a gait she’d figured out yesterday, that her family observers told her was a gallop. “You–whath is it? Is ith clothing? How am ah gonna geth it on?!”

“Calm down, sis,” Big Macintosh said, pushing her back from rearing up to climb up his legs. “It’s a dress,” he explained, “Supposed to be at any rate. You just put it on like a t-shirt. Should give you some modesty, if ah measured right.”

Apple Bloom eagerly complied with his demands, and ended up sitting back on her haunches and pulling her elbows out to hold her hooves high above her head, so he could slip it down on top of her that way. She actually pulled it on herself, the rest of the way, by sticking her hooves through the sleeves and tugging the edges of the cloth with her teeth to get it all wrapped around her.

It was a dress made out of cheap linen, not died or adorned with lace or anything, but Apple Bloom was ready to say it was the best dress she’d ever worn in her life. It felt so good to have clothing on again. It had basic sleeves, and a skirt that was long enough that it draped down right around her bottom, and there was a special addition to it that she really appreciated, a hole for her tail!

Seriously, Apple Bloom couldn’t imagine what kind of ridiculous design for a dress that would go on top of your tail.

She turned in excited circles to look at her now covered rear end, pausing a little bit disappointed. The cut of the tail hole still kind of gave her some sort of butt cleavage, but it was lots better than just showing it all off to the world.

“Was gonna add buttons,” Big Mac said getting down on a knee, and observing what she was looking at, “But... y’know. Maybe a pull string to tighten it.”

“Thank you so much, Big Macintosh!” Apple Bloom exclaimed, leaping to wrap her arms around him joyfully. Part of the way around him at least. She couldn’t even get her tiny little hooves halfway around his big broad chest. Matter of fact, why wasn’t she just slipping off him and falling, like this? Oh well, it didn’t matter because she had dignity again!

As she tested out her garment, Apple Bloom found herself trodding on the drooping hemline, fussing about it until Big Macintosh just went and got some cloth shears, cutting it so it didn’t catch on her feet anymore. He didn’t bother hemming it, but that was fine. Apple Bloom looked at herself in the bottom of the full length door mirror, like some kind of little pony diva. It didn’t look fancy but, it was a lot better than she even imagined. Apple Bloom hadn’t even realized just how vulnerable being buck naked all the time was making her feel.

Later, she heard Applejack’s truck pulling into the driveway, her sister back from the weekend shopping. Apple Bloom ran to greet her, though stopped and wobbled... a bit dizzy halfway there, and just walked the rest of the way. “Sis, look!” Apple Bloom exclaimed, as Applejack opened up the front door. “Applejack! Look!”

“Well isn’t that just the most darling thing ever!” Applejack declared, coming down to Apple Bloom’s level. “Big Mac outdone himself, ah have to say!”

“You knew he was making this?” Apple Bloom gasped.

Applejack nodded. “He wanted it to be a surprise, after ah tried... y’know, with the messed up stitchin’ and all. It looks great on you!”

“It is great!” Apple Bloom agreed fervently, “Ah feel so much bether. This is the bes’ news ah’ve had since this happen’ to me!”

Applejack gave a self satisfied smile at that, saying, “Well ah may be able to one-up Big Macintosh in that regard.”

“Whahddya mean?” Apple Bloom asked, looking at her sister trying to read her expression.

“Just wait one sec,” Applejack said, standing up and leaving Apple Bloom there on the floor. “Ah’ll go get... ah’ll be right back.”

Applejack walked out the door, leaving it closed but unlatched and just went back to her truck, where the door could be heard opening and closing again. Using her freaky ears, Apple Bloom could hear Applejack, Big Macintosh and Granny Smith, all walking together towards the house. Though she recalled Granny’s footfalls to be heavier than that, and wasn’t Big Mac’s stride a whole lot longer?

When Applejack returned to the house and opened the door, Apple Bloom froze on the spot, just like a deer in headlights, at the second surprise of the day. She she she she she she she wasn’t ready! She wasn’t she... she was looking right at the gaping, open mouthed faces of two very close friends of hers. “S-Sweetie Belle?!” Apple Bloom exclaimed, “Shcootaloo?!”

“I knew it!” Scootaloo cheered, pumping the air.

“You are so ado҉rable!” Sweetie Belle exclaimed, kneeling down and clasping her pale white hands in delight.

“But...” Apple Bloom balked, “Ah don’... ah ain’...”

“Now Apple Bloom,” Applejack spoke down to her chidingly, hands on hips, “These are your friends, you can trust them. Plus they already know about you, so there’s nothin’ to hide.”

“But Applejack!” Apple Bloom protested, shifting on her hooves agitatedly.

“But nothing!” Applejack cut her off. “It took a good friend’a mine to show me this, but you caint just hide away your whole life. Your friends need you, and you need them, and it don’t matter if you’re some kinda pony or not.”

“Ah guess so...” Apple Bloom said when she couldn’t think of any way to argue, around her full face blush, and around her hoof covering her face from everyone’s inquisitive eyes.

“And that is why ah’ve given your friends permission to carry you around like a dolly, until you loosen up a bit,” Applejack concluded smugly.

Apple Bloom smiled guiltily, saying, “Yeah I...” she paused. “Wait, what was that last part again?”

Sweetie Belle’s bright smile seemed so much more predatory all of a sudden, as the adorable little girl wrapped her arms around the even more adorable little pony, and lifted Apple Bloom high up into the air.

Apple Bloom had only a small chance to glare at Applejack, point a hoof and avow to her, “You owe me big for this,” before her giggling friends dragged her bodily outside into the bright sun to play.

On a seemingly unrelated note, while the three kids played together and made friends with each other all over again, at least a mile away at the base of a rather technologically augmented tree, an unlikely pair were engaging in the unlikely act of hugging each other, laughing excitedly, and dancing in a circle.

And, that should have been it. That should have solved everything. With her new dress and her beloved friends, Apple Bloom had never felt better than she had ever felt all the past five long days. Six, if you counted the one where she was half a pony. Seven, by the time this sleepover was done. Apple Bloom wanted so badly for it to be enough, for it to get her out of this god damned funk she was in, but it just wasn’t working, even now.

Apple Bloom had a lot of fun, but kept coming up short. She wanted to show them all the cool physical stuff she learned how to do over the past days, but she got tired so quickly now. She wanted to learn everything about school and about what she’d been missing outside the farm, but she just felt too spacy to put more than two thoughts together. And she wanted to laugh at their jokes and their joyful acceptance of her condition, but she just felt so bitter, and drained. Apple Bloom was in the middle of trying to pantomime Ms. Harshvoice’s reaction to Apple Bloom’s ears being real, and she just got tired all of a sudden and fell painfully on her belly. And then she started crying, and she couldn’t stop!

So that’s how her afternoon ended, crying inconsolably, carried in the arms of her friends, who asked Applejack in a panic what was wrong and what they should do, and Applejack didn’t know, and Apple Bloom didn’t know, and... that was when everybody, including Apple Bloom, started to suspect that there was something seriously wrong with her.

The next day wasn’t any better, and Apple Bloom felt even worse if that were possible. She should have had a sleepover, but she just woke up alone. Apple Bloom couldn’t even bring herself to eat anymore. She was just so very sick of hay. She’d humiliated herself in front of her friends, and she didn’t even know why.

It couldn’t have been a simple answer either. The vet didn’t know what to do. Dr. Cureall was downright paranoid, accusing Apple Bloom of having eaten a million things from onions to chocolate, to pain pills. She said Apple Bloom had to eat or she’d keep getting more anemic, and Apple Bloom said maybe she’d go eat a big old bowl of black forest ice cream with chocolate syrup on top, and it kind of devolved into shouting from there. That lady really knew how to take care of their animals, but she was not a people person.

Dr. Cureall gave Apple Bloom a sickly sweet paste to rub on her gums, and it really did help a little, but the doc said it was a totally different situation than ice cream or candy, and then the doctor said you know what I don’t even know anymore. Go ahead and give yourself metabolic syndrome. And when the vet drove off in a panicked huff, Apple Bloom just...

Apple Bloom just went meekly to her hay bale and, she really did try to eat that hay, and she really did chew it, and swallow it and consume the tasteless stuff. It just wasn’t making her feel better though, so Apple Bloom just went to bed early, again. Didn’t even bother getting on the bed this time, just pulled a blanket down and curled up underneath it. Like a horse.

And that’s why only a day later, with the end of the weekend at hand, Apple Bloom was creeping downstairs in the darkness, in the middle of the night. She had smelled it before she saw it: a triple layer chocolate fudge cake, lovingly crafted on special request for a faculty holiday party. Granny wasn’t the best at baking, but being on school payroll made her the cheapest, and that left it to her to make something special to really wow the administrators involved. Apple Bloom couldn’t get it out of her head all night. She remembered what the vet said about the terrible consequences of chocolate... but she also remembered the taste of chocolate. The taste of thick, rich, creamy chocolate frosting, sealing in the buttery, complex moisture of the dark as night, syrup drizzled cake.

So, she crept down to take a look at it. Apple Bloom had not yet gone down the stairs herself as a pony, but it couldn’t be harder than messing around on the fence. She eased down a step, found her footing (or, hoofing?) firm, and continued the next step. She wobbled and tottered, but somehow made it down in one piece, and more importantly quietly. Because she was just going to take another look at it—she wasn’t going to eat it or anything, and if she woke anyone up, they just wouldn’t understand. They’d think she was going to go try and eat it, when she was just going to look, so there was no need to alarm them over nothing.

The cake was sitting on the kitchen counter, ready to lift out and carry to the truck, and from there to the hungry mouths of school administrators. First Apple Bloom’s bouncy red curls, then her yellow furry pony ears, and then her gleaming orange eyes rose from beneath the level of the counter to peer at the cake. It looked so huge, with how small she was now. It was like a tower of chocolate.

Apple Bloom had long since removed her dress and bow for sleeping, though sleep proved impossible tonight. It left her now as naked as the day she was born, if she had been born a pony, that is. It was too much trouble to put that stuff on, since Apple Bloom couldn’t ask for anyone’s help now, or they wouldn’t let her eat—look at the cake. It’s not like anyone would see her, or ever know about this. She was just considering, you know, considering.

There was just a flimsy layer of cellophane between Apple Bloom and the cake. An effective barrier against moisture, for sure. Apple Bloom wondered if she could maybe pull it aside just a little bit, and just maybe take a little taste of the cake, just a little lick to make sure she really can’t eat food like this. It’d probably taste bad, like poison like the vet said. Then Apple Bloom would know, and she could eat hay forever and never be happy again.

The cellophane crinkled way too noisily as her hoof disturbed it, picking away at the rolled edge and separating the edges into a broad gap. She looked around in paranoid fear at the silent darkness around her, the blue moonlight filtering through the windows seeming entirely too bright for her liking. She didn’t see any signs of movement, so carefully she pulled the cellophane aside just a bit. The heady smell of chocolate immediately assaulted Apple Bloom’s nose, and it was all she could do to stop from drooling all over the floor. No really, she had to wipe at her mouth and everything.

Maybe just a teeny little, she told herself silently, heart thudding as the cake beckoned to her in the moonlit darkness. Just an edge of the frosting, the teeniest little bite. It was frosting, so it couldn’t be bad, right? Frosting wasn’t a bad thing, the bad thing was the chocolate, right? Maybe if it was chocolate, but frosting, then it was okay? Needless to say, Apple Bloom wasn’t very cognizant in her thoughts when she stretched her neck forward, and took just a tiny little nibble from the edge of the third layer of cake.

When the morning came, Apple Bloom woke up nice and easy. She felt funny, but she felt too lazy to even open her eyes. The sunlight was shining across them uncomfortably, and she shifted to take the glare off them, and doing that felt funny too. But it wasn’t until five minutes later, that her doze was abruptly terminated by the sound of Applejack hollering, not three feet away from her, at the top of her lungs, “Apple Bloom, what have you done?!”

“Wuah!” Apple Bloom squealed, half sitting up, and then falling back as she slipped in place. She was on the kitchen counter; why was she on the kitchen counter?! Why did everything feel all sticky and messy? What the blue blazes was she lying in?! It was brown and chocolatey and oh.

Oh right....

“I-I-I can explain!” Apple Bloom stammered drunkenly, struggling up from her belly up position, throughly buried in the remains of a triple layer chocolate fudge cake. What remained of it—and a very large amount of it was mysteriously missing—had been utterly ruined by the pony sitting in the middle, squashing the whole thing to pieces. Apple Bloom slipped again, and fell back into the mess, getting herself thoroughly splattered with gooey chocolate frosting.

She lay there, staring at the ceiling dolefully, then said in a disgruntled tone, “You know what, actually, I cain’t explain.”

Author's Note

Oh no, what a cliffhanger! Will she pony pony pony? Tune in next week! Same bat time! Same bat channel!

Life a la Mode

There on the kitchen counter, Apple Bloom lay, looking like a fox in the hen house. She shrank before her sister’s panicked gaze, still buried hip deep in triple layer, double fudge cake. To say nothing about the triple layer, double fudge cake, with extra fudgey frosting, that was currently inside of Apple Bloom’s pleasantly purring belly.

“It’s all over you!” Applejack yelled, yanking Apple Bloom by her armpits up into the air, with splatters of chocolate cake going everywhere. “Why did you do this?! You didn’t eat any did you?! Did any get in your mouth?!”

“Ah ate...” Apple Bloom said hanging there disorientedly, “Too much.” If it wasn’t obvious, that is. Her belly was outright swollen, from how much cake she frantically scarfed down, before falling into a blissful stupor.

“How could you, Apple Bloom?!” Applejack exclaimed in horror, “You know what that’ll do to you!”

“Ah know!” Apple Bloom shouted back shrilly, “Ah was justh gonna eat a little bit ah jusht– ah couldn’ hold back!”

“What’s all the ruckus down here—oh no Apple Bloom what have ye done?!” Granny Smith exclaimed after trundling downstairs and setting eyes on the chocolate cake and the mostly chocolate pony in Applejack’s arms. Apple Bloom tried to protest or something but Granny just ran over and grabbed Apple Bloom from behind, warring with Applejack for the pony as she shouted, “When did she eat it?!” to Applejack.

“Last night!” Apple Bloom cried out. “Stoppit lemme go you’re hurtin’ me!”

Big Macintosh was just there in her face then, exclaiming with terrified eyes, “What have you—”

“Ah ate the cake!” Apple Bloom shouted pitifully. At least Granny wasn’t trying to haul her out of Applejack’s hands anymore. “Ah’m sorry I– ugh...” a twisting in her belly made her suddenly feel very bloated and ill. Was this it? Was this the end?!

Applejack put her down on the kitchen table, where Apple Bloom clutched her round tummy painfully. “What do we do?!” Applejack shouted as the three crowded around Apple Bloom there on the table, “Are ya hurt? Are you dyin’? Please don’t die on me, Apple Bloom!”

Apple Bloom’s belch resounded through the rafters of the farm house. That did it. She felt awesome again. Nothing could ruin her day now. She knew she should care, and be scared and all, but she couldn’t care about anything anymore. It was great.

“Ah’ll call the vet!” Granny shouted, running for the house phone. Applejack remained by Apple Bloom, the girl squeezing her legs together and fussing over the little pony. Apple Bloom noticed, belatedly, that Applejack hadn’t even had a chance to get her pants on. She was there in her nightgown. Applejack must have sussed something was wrong, and just come running down here without a thought, only to find the worst possible thing!

Apple Bloom should have felt terrified and ashamed. She lowered her ears, trying to look guilty and sympathetic towards her sister. “Ah’m sorry big sis,” she said woefully, “Ah don’t feel bad though. I’m fine!”

“You’re fine now,” Applejack said disconsolately, “But you just wait until it hits you, and then see how fine you are!”

“Already hit me,” Apple Bloom mumbled dazedly, “Big time...”

“Just, just keep it together sis,” Applejack stammered. “Don’t let it get you let us know if you start feeling anything just keep it together you can do this.” Unable to make sense of Applejack’s word salad, Apple Bloom just lay back on the table, with her hooves folded compactly against her chest. Despite the urgency of the situation, Apple Bloom felt so peaceful, like her eyes were just going to close all by themselves.

“No Apple Bloom, you gotta stay with us!” Applejack shouted, drawing Apple Bloom’s glance of irritation. Heedlessly, Applejack continued looming right up to Apple Bloom enunciating loudly right in her face, “Don’t! Go into! The light!”

“Applejack, you’re hurtin’ mah ears!” Apple Bloom protested, reaching up to cover her ears in her hooves. As she stretched, it made the sugary residue of cake filling crack against her stretching hide. “Ah’m fine!” she said unconvincingly.

“No you’re not!” Applejack insisted stubbornly.

“Yes ah am!” Apple Bloom insisted stubbornly.

“No you’re not!” Applejack ins... it continued on something like, this for a while.

When the vet’s car screeched up, Apple Bloom and Applejack were arguing over every little thing. Big Macintosh was just sitting on the couch, with his head in his hands. Granny was charging out at top grannyspeed to greet the doctor. So, that’s what the blue haired vet ran into, is Apple Bloom licking the chocolate off her forehoof, and Applejack shouting,

“Stop doing that! You’ll get yourself sick!” and Apple Bloom shouting back,

“I already ate plenty! It caint get any worse!”

“Leave it alone!”

“But ah’m all sticky!”

“Is...” the vet paused and leaned over to Granny Smith, asking as if she didn’t believe her eyes. “Is that pony covered in chocolate?”

“Ah told you, she ate somethin’ she shouldn’t have!” Granny said angrily back.

“She ate... chocolate cake??” Dr. Cureall exclaimed, utterly baffled.

“Last night,” Applejack said, hopping in front of the doctor, “She’s been sittin’ there with it in her tummy all night! It was the faculty meeting it was supposed to... we should never have made it!”

The vet turned just slightly to face Applejack asking her, “How much cake?”

Applejack only whimpered in response, so Apple Bloom herself just shouted “A lot!” vindictively, over to the doctor standing at the door. Apple Bloom wasn’t going to walk over to the doctor though, because she was feeling so very relaxed. She just figured she as going to lie here on the kitchen table forever.

“Chocolate.” the vet repeated faintly. Applejack nodded. “And frosting?” Cureall asked weakly.

“So much frosting!” Apple Bloom exclaimed dreamily on her back.

The vet looked from Applejack, to Apple Bloom lying there on the kitchen table, to the ruined cake still left otherwise untouched on the counter. Then she turned around, and walked out the door.

“Hey—come back!!” Applejack shrieked, charging after Dr. Cureall.

“No!” the vet shouted back, still stomping off, “I’m done! I give up!” When the door slammed shut, the doctor’s voice grew too faint to hear after that, which of course meant Apple Bloom kept on hearing it. “I can’t do this!” the doctor’s voice drifted back quietly. “I’m a veterinarian, not a psychic type!”

“You gotta do something!” Applejack’s voice drifted back while Apple Bloom sat up craning her ears toward the door. “Mah sister is in trouble! She could be dyin’!”

“She should be dead!” the vet’s voice shouted back with an angry stomp. “She should have exploded! This is not an exaggeration! Her intestinal flora should have produced so much carbon dioxide from all that sugar that her organs ruptured! It doesn’t make any sense, and if it doesn’t make any sense, then there’s nothing I can do!”

“Please, ah’m beggin’ you!” Applejack said. From the thump of knees on grass it sounded like she was literally begging her. “Just check her out, please? You gotta at least try! Ah don’t want my baby sister to die!” Apple Bloom turned her head away then, deliberately facing her ears in the other direction, so as not to hear her sister begin bawling like a five year old.

Some time later, the front door swung open to reveal a solemn tear streaked Applejack. Behind her came the vet, the two of them walking in as per some silent agreement, that Apple Bloom had managed to prevent herself from hearing, thank goodness. Apple Bloom looked up at Dr. Cureall silently, and guiltily. The doctor walked up to her equally silently, looking her up and down. “Missus doctor,” Apple Bloom said in a tiny voice, cringing away. “Ah’m sor–”

She didn’t expect the doctor to slump down into a chair at the table, bury her face in her own hands, and say in a very troubled tone, “This is all my fault...”

Apple Bloom paused uncertainly. There wasn’t a word for how uncertain she felt. “It’s okay doctor Cureall,” she said bewilderedly, trying to appease the doctor’s... whatever this was. “I forgive you? Ah feel fine. Ah was tryin’ to eat just grass, but ah just couldn’t!” Apple Bloom had since managed to stand up on the table, and jumped off of it, wincing as the sticky cake filling tugged at her fur. She landed on all fours, and underneath, her belly... mostly didn’t touch the floor. She then walked to the foot of the doctor’s ...feet, putting a concerned hoof on Dr. Cureall’s shin, and looking up at her.

Dr. Cureall’s face left her hands, and she shuddered a sigh. “I should never have told you what to eat, Apple Bloom,” she said penitently. “I should have realized what was going on. I didn’t even think... I thought I knew what was going on, but I knew nothing. I-I’m sorry.”

The vet lifted her head, and addressed everyone else, saying, “I’m sorry, everyone!” It was kind of awkward the way she said it though, because of the bright tone she used, and she didn’t say anything after that, just looked at them expectantly.

“So...” Apple Bloom said uncertainly, “I cain eat chocolate?”

“Apple Bloom, you’re not an animal,” the doctor asserted, then thought better of it and said, “I mean, you’re not a horse. I don’t know what you are, and I’ve never studied anything like it before. Why are you asking me what you can eat then? You’re more of an expert than I am!”

“Ah don’t know though!” Apple Bloom protested sharply.

“That’s the thing Apple Bloom,” the doctor said to her. “If you don’t know, then nobody knows. I told you what to eat, and all I did was make you sick!”

“You didn’t make me sick!” Apple Bloom protested. “Ah didn’t eat mah grass just like you told me to! This weren’t your fault!”

The doctor looked down at Apple Bloom incredulously. “Did you not understand me?” she asked accusingly. “Eating nothing but grass was making you hypoglycemic, and it never even occurred to me! You clearly have to eat more than just grass, and I couldn’t see that because all I saw was a horse!”

“Ah have to eat more than just grass?” Apple Bloom asked hopefully. The vet nodded. “Ah have to eat more than just grass!” Apple Bloom exclaimed in sudden clarity. She hugged the vet around her legs saying, “Oh, thank you thank you!”

She turned and stomped on all fours, facing her family then, and declared to them defiantly, “Ah have to eat more than just grassh!” Apple Bloom’s fierce crouch made her belly touch the floor again though, so she stood up more, and said a little more lucidly to them,

“Ah have to eat more than just grass! Ah been eating hay all this time, and feeling like eating other stuff, because I can! You caint make me just eat hay, because it ain’t good for me! Ya heard the doctor! Ah ate the cake an’ ah’m fine! Ah’m not gonna die, ah’m not gonna get sick, an’ ah’m not sorry!”

“C-can she eat meat now?” Applejack asked the vet, all flabbergasted.

The vet glared at her and responded, “Why is everyone asking me? Apple Bloom can eat rocks, for all I know! Just... just eat a little bit and see if it bothers you. That’s my answer for every food, because I Just Don’t Know.”

Apple Bloom would have consoled the agitated doctor some more, but she was unavailable right now, due to slipping into a drooling hypnotic trance at the thought that maybe she could once again eat bacon.

In an undisclosed location far across town, Twilight Sparkle sat there in the seedy motel they hid out at after the realtors came back to that house, the cot underneath her aching in its springs. She continued to pet the green and purple dog in her lap, her best assistant now considerably reduced in his capabilities, along with all the rest of them. Thankfully, being a book rest was still within his capabilities, so she continued to read what she could about this fascinating but terribly frustrating world.

At least Spike didn’t mind comforting her, and she certainly understood his appreciation for what these miraculous hands could accomplish against someone’s hide. But now, she wasn’t concerned with her faithful friend’s ability, or dignity. It was another thing entirely that darkened her brow, shaded beneath her clean cut bangs.

“We’re doing the right thing, aren’t we?” Twilight asked.

Leaning precariously back in a chair, by their little kitchenette, Sunset Shimmer tossed a ball up into the air again, and again. She didn’t respond for a while, but then said in partial acquiescence, “It worked, didn’t it? The facture is expanding quickly, and it won’t be long before we can put all this behind us.”

“She was crying,” Twilight said somberly. “Is there something about it that hurts her? Why was she so distressed? What could we be doing wrong? And why is she a pon–”

“I don’t know!” Sunset snapped, the ball hitting the ceiling as she threw it a little bit too hard. “There’s no reason she should be a pony, and there’s no reason her health should continue to deteriorate like this!”

“If only Applejack could tell us what’s wrong,” Twilight fretted. Spike had gone to sleep on her lap it seemed, so he didn’t bear the brunt of her terrible wrath just now. She made sure to give him extra scratches, around behind his ears, just in case. “Your Applejack, I mean,” she quietly qualified.

Sunset stopped throwing the ball, just looking up at the ceiling. Then she started to laugh, and it wasn’t the healthiest laugh. Her chair legs thumped into the floor, as she gasped in harshly manic, uncontrolled laughter, more full of released pain than of joy. Twilight let her do that, if feeling very uncomfortable about it. Sunset managed to collect her wits eventually. “I can’t believe it’s really happening,” Sunset said, staring at her hands as though they were alien to her. Which they were, once, long ago. “After all these times, and thanks to you, we finally really did it!”

“Thanks to both of us,” Twilight Sparkle said, giving Sunset a meaningful look. “And let’s not forget about Apple Bloom. Whatever she’s done, we owe everything to her.”

“She could have done it before!” Sunset shouted in sudden anger. She caught herself, and said in a more level tone, “I just don’t get why it’s happening now and not... before...”

“Our last run may have had something to do with it,” Twilight drawled wryly. Sunset laughed at that, a much healthier laugh of genuine appreciation.

“I thought it was a done deal back then,” she said. “Sort of glad you managed to stop me before I went and screwed up again.”

“I think of all ponies, you have the least to apologize for,” Twilight said authoritatively to Sunset. “You made a mistake once, when you were young and impetuous, and it’s been how many years since then?”

“87,” Sunset said dully. “I’m practically an old mare by now, or at least I should be!” Her words were harsh, but her demeanor was relatively relaxed about it. Twilight had to assume that Sunset was being humorous in this, not so much serious about it. Twilight had to count on her fingers a little bit to make sure of that number, but she smiled when she did saying,

“You’re a good way from that, and you know it. You might be old enough to be my mother, but my mother’s not an old mare by anypony’s judgement!”

“I’d really appreciate those years better,” Sunset said, “If I wasn’t stuck like this the whole time.”

Twilight shook her head sadly. “Imagine how it’s been for–”

“Yeah, I know,” Sunset cut in. “These poor saps. I don’t even think they know how to live beyond this high school of theirs.”

“Our world can ostensibly provide aid, when the portal opens again,” Twilight pointed out. Sunset just nodded silently. Then Sunset Shimmer lay her hands on her knees, staring downward as if deep in thought.

She clapped her knees then, standing up and saying, “I’m going to talk to Applejack.”

Twilight blinked in wide eyed surprise. Then her eyes softened and she said, “That’s very brave of you, Sunset.”

“You have no idea,” Sunset exclaimed with a tense grin. “I’m not used to this. Anything I do could screw everything up and I’d have no way to make up for it. If it’s not perfect, I feel like... I just can’t make mistakes anymore.”

“You can always make up for your mistakes,” Twilight said sympathetically. “You just can’t... y’know...” She waved a hand unexpressively.

“Yeah...” Sunset trailed off dully. She shook her head though, and said, “But we did it. They did it. That door is blown wide open and there’s no way to shut it, not accidentally, not even if I tried. I’m going to talk with Applejack. Try to find out what’s wrong with Apple Bloom. I hope they’re treating her alright.”

“Well, they have horses,” Twilight pointed out. “Those are fairly similar to ponies.”

“The horses of this world are a lot different than the horses of our world,” Sunset said warily. “I think it might be past time to offer her my advice. We might be the only ones in the world who know something about ponies, and Apple Bloom might need that knowledge someday, possibly sooner than later!”

“Well, you know what you’re doing...” Twilight said trying not to sound disappointed.

“Hey if the facture continues to realize,” Sunset said lifting the ball in her hands. She tossed it at Twilight who, thanks to a lot of telegraphed movements from Sunset, managed to put her book down long enough to catch it. “Then there’s no reason you can’t come see all my friends again. I bet they’ll even be friends with you, right off the bat. I understand why you’d want to avoid them but... hey, we did it. So there’s no more reason to do so!”

Twilight’s smile grew at that. “You know, you’re right,” she said wistfully. “And if not them, then perhaps even the Principals, or officials from the city. I’m pretty sure your version of Mayor Mare is down running town hall. We could start diplomatic relations, even trade agreements!” She squeed in excitement.

Sunset raised an eyebrow at her.

“Ohh, hush!” Twilight huffed embarassedly, falling on her back on the cottage bed, and pulling Spike with her to her chest. It woke him up, but he just yawned, and went back to sleep without another word. Typical Spike.

Meanwhile, it was after curfew, after the lights had gone out in the orphanage, and everything was still. Every evening for the past four days, a plucky lass known as Diamond Tiara would crouch under her blanket, peering at the laptop she’d taken without permission, and not yet gotten caught for it. She had to take it, because she had to know. She had to prove to herself each and every night that what she knew was real.

So, after the lights went out, she would uncover the laptop from its hiding place, and cover herself in a blanket to hide the light. Her roommates could hear what she was listening to, but she turned the volume down as much as she could, while still being able to hear it, and they hadn’t ratted on her just yet. She’d pay for that eventually, but they were still trying to figure how to use their new leverage against her.

There by a dimly glowing light, illuminating the silouette of the pink and white haired fashionista-in-training, a mere monochrome shadow underneath her blanket, there in the darkness the sights and sounds would once again relieve the tension in her head, and make it so she could sleep again, Apple Bloom’s bright tones came over the speaker, from the recorded conversation.

“They shtarted at 6 this mornin’ but, ah didn’t really notice until after lunch today...”

Apple Bloom never repeated her incident with the cake, but that cake was it, thoroughly and totally. Her friends couldn’t help her, her clothes couldn’t help her, but that cake golly it darn near saved her little pony life! She was running around outside all morning and dancing and laughing and feeling great! Her dress had grass stains when she was done with it, and Big Macintosh suggested that until they had her more clothing she should probably only wear it for guests. And Apple Bloom was ...surprisingly okay with that. Because she was okay, and she wasn’t going to let anything else get her down.

She probably would have made herself sick, devouring every unhealthy and godforsaken food item in the larder, but thankfully Applejack still had a healthy sense of paranoia, and she made sure to impress on Apple Bloom, with force if necessary, that the vet had only said try a little bit, not a lot. So Apple Bloom got to have energy, and play around like the cute little pony she felt like again. And if she never touched another blade of grass it would be too soon!

...that afternoon, Apple Bloom was sitting there munching on hay again, trying not to draw attention to it. She thought she couldn’t stand hay anymore, but she got so hungry for it then, and well, she had to eat some, to make everything else go down easy. It was as if Apple Bloom was a pony, but only half a pony, and half a girl. Which made sense, since she still had her colors, and she still had her voice, albeit a lot higher and more prone to squeaking. It didn’t really make sense, but Apple Bloom wasn’t going to question it. If she had to eat a little bit of hay every now and again, in order to enjoy herself a nice sizzling strip of bacon, then that was just fine.

Another weekend came, and sure enough Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo were available again, and they were all too happy to make amends.

“Y’all don’t have to make amends, Sweetie!” Apple Bloom protested from her position on the living room rug. “Ah’m the one who was doing things wrong, an’ I fixed it, an’ ah’m fine!”

“Yeah, well,” Scootaloo said, clasping a dismissive hand behind her head, “Well, Applejack really wanted us to come over, so you’re just gonna have to deal with it.”

“Oh, so Applejack sent you here, did she?” Apple Bloom said disapprovingly, looking at the silouette of her sister through the curtains, clearly doing Very Important things by her truck.

“No!” Scootaloo said waving her hands, “I mean, we wanted to come. I mean, she just suggested it and we really—”

“It’s fine,” Apple Bloom told her, turning with a smile. “Ah cain’t thank you enough for comin’. It’s so boring just sitting around the farm all the time! I dunno how the other critters do it. It’s so bad, ah almost miss goin’ to school.”

“Well, why can’t you?” Sweetie Belle asked innocently.

“Y’ever seen a horse goin’ to school?” Apple Bloom asked her grumpily.

“No,” Sweetie answered, “But I’ve never seen a pony who could talk, either!”

Apple Bloom blushed, saying “You’re really dead set on that whole ‘pony’ thing, huh?”

Sweetie shrugged. “It sounds better, doesn’t it?”

Apple Bloom opened her mouth to answer, then thought better of herself, then she stood up with her rather messy ‘visitor dress’ draping around her legs making her look more like a little dirty grey caterpillar with a pony’s head, than a pony.

“So what are we doin’?” Apple Bloom asked excitedly, feeling the energy coursing through her veins. “Y’wanna see what I can eat? Wanna go play on the fence? I got a ball we could kick around! I can kick it way far. You wanna see the pasture? We got all sorts of cows out there!”

“Let’s go see the horses!” Scootaloo said eagerly.

“The horses?!” Apple Bloom suddenly exclaimed in dread.

She even backed up a step. She’d been avoiding the horses like the plague, ever since she turned into one. She hadn’t even been thinking about them anymore. Big Macintosh and Applejack just went out, and magically brought the cows in all on their own, and Winona and Gummy were not even a factor of consideration.

“I want to see if you can talk to them!” Scootaloo cheered, nodding with a wide grin.

“Ah g-guess we could ah mean,” Apple Bloom stammered, “But ah don’t think ah can talk to them. I ain’t a regular horse, after all!”

It was Sweetie Belle who gave a disappointed pout at that, but Scootaloo said challengingly to Apple Bloom, “Hey, you never know if you don’t try. I bet you haven’t even seen the horses yet yourself!”

Apple Bloom said in an outraged tone, “Yes I—okay, yeah ya got me.”

Defeated, she walked between her towering friends, through the front door they came, saying “C’mon, they should be out in the corral this time of day.”

“You want us to carry you?” Sweetie Belle suggested hopefully.

Apple Bloom shook her head, “Now why would you do that?!”

“Well it’s just our legs are longer...” Sweetie said, with a disappointed pout.

“That right?” Apple Bloom grinned at her, “I’d like ta see you keep up!” She trotted off, which was kind of a two beat scissor step, and that alone was fast enough to keep up with them walking. So she trotted faster until it switched on its own into a gallop, making good distance from them before Scootaloo realized, and started to charge after Apple Bloom. The little pony laughed her head off, running for the love of it. She may have had little stubby legs, but she had four of them, and that left even her athletic friend hard pressed to keep up.

Scootaloo was still trying to keep pace with her, when they got to the corral. She and Apple Bloom both stood there panting, while Scootaloo leaned on the fence holding the horses in. Sweetie Belle came running up herself, shouting “Wait up!” from a distance, as the delicate little girl approached. And that shout brought, well, one of the horses to come over, looking at what’s going on. Apple Bloom found herself backing up, despite trying to put on a face of bravado. She knew they were going to be big, but she didn’t think Winona was going to be this big.

As a mountain of horse thundered up to the fence of the corral, stuck her fat neck over the fence and immediately began whuffling around for treats, Apple Bloom just found herself staring at Winona’s big long nose, and her beady little eyes that twinkled in the sunlight. You couldn’t tell if she was looking at you, but she was looking at you. Which is to say she was looking down at Apple Bloom with the most confused expression a horse could ever adopt. Which is to say, a look of complete indifference.

Apple Bloom’s tail bowed as she inadvertently backed right up into Scootaloo’s legs. She looked back, and up, and Scootaloo was looking at her expectantly with a big excited smile. Now Apple Bloom was confused. Did Scootaloo want something?

“Go on,” Scootaloo said eagerly, “Try to talk to her!”

Apple Bloom blinked, and then her ears went flat. “Now hold on,” she said turning to Scootaloo irritably, “Ah ain’ got no supernatural powers to speak with horses. Ah may look like one, but she’s way bigger, and... and ah can talk, not whinny!”

“Couldn’t you at least try?” Scootaloo said pouting disappointedly. Apple Bloom took a look behind her, shaking her head.

“No way,” she said assertively. “Ah might get bit! Just look at how nervous she is. Cain’t you see something’s got her spooked? She’s just gonna run off anyway.”

“She looks fine to me,” Sweetie Belle said uncertainly, staring at Winona and keeping her distance.

“We never spooked her before,” Scootaloo said insistently. “She knows us already, and she’s super brave for a horse.”

Apple Bloom stuck a hoof toward what she could see through the fence, saying quickly, “Yeah, but her legs are all stiff like she’s liable to bolt and her lip’s just a bit curled like when you’re real nervous. Just look at the angle of her tail, and she’s got that look in her eyes like she don’t know what the fuck she’s looking at—” Winona bolted, dashing off to the other side of the corral.

“Y’see?” Apple Bloom said plainly, almost relieved to say, “Ah cain’t communicate with horses. They just look the same to me! Just bigger, and lots bigger. And weirder, if that’s possible.”

There was a significant reluctant pause in her friends, which made Apple Bloom think they weren’t exactly taking her seriously, when Sweetie Belle said, “Why don’t we try Gummy?”

Apple Bloom sighed disgustedly, dragging a hoof down her own comparatively long face.

Gummy was an older horse. He was Big Mac’s big baby, despite being beyond the prime of his life. Apple Bloom did not look forward to when they were going to have to get a new Gummy. She was no dummy; she knew a thing or two about mortality, and hamsters that die on you, just because you forgot to feed them ...for a week. And Gummy was looking his years. Glassy eyes out of focus, old teeth worn smooth, yellowed and ringy. If it bothered him, nobody would ever be able to tell, because this was a horse who had seen it all. Absolutely nothing phased him.

So really, it made him ideal for the CMC to experiment with, using Apple Bloom as the guinea pig. Except for the fact that nothing phased him, so he didn’t react to anything they tried. Scootaloo climbed in and actually led him over to the fence, which he did amiably. He just stood there though, looking enigmatically down at Apple Bloom standing there at the foot of the fence.

“Hey there... Gummy,” Apple Bloom said in a less than impressed tone. He didn’t react. “Mah friends think I got some magic ability to talk to horses now, just because I’m a pony,” she informed him. He blinked at her... slowly. “You wanna just tell them how they’re all wasting their time?” she requested politely. “You’ll want to phrase it in plain English and not magic secret horse speak.”

“Okay, okay, I get it!” Scootaloo said, blushing with frustration, letting Gummy’s lead loose so he could wander off, as amiably as he had approached. He didn’t wander off though, just stayed standing there, blinking every now and again. “Sorry I even brought it up,” Scootaloo grumbled embarassedly.

“No, it’s okay Scootaloo,” Apple Bloom admitted, hopping up onto the fence and balancing on its edge on three legs. Her plan worked, and she could reach a hoof up to scratch the groove under Gummy’s chin, just the way he loved it. “You got me over here, didn’t you?” she said wobbling as Gummy leaned his head against her hoof. “Ah been avoidin’ the horses and you showed me that ah was scared over–woAH!” a squeal belted out of her, as Gummy’s tongue managed to lick her entire body. Now her dress was even more ruined!

She hopped down from the fence, shaking off as best she could without disarraying herself further, shouting, “Gummy! Ewww!”

Scootaloo vaulted the fence, to land beside Sweetie Belle, and Gummy finally meandered away.

“I really thought we were onto something,” Sweetie grumbled cutely, leaning her butt against the fence and cupping her hand under her chin.

“Well y’ain’t,” Apple Bloom said prancing in front of them a bit smugly, “Because ah’m as normal as ever, and that’s fine with me!”

Scootaloo and Sweetie were looking at her a bit critically, but Scoots had a great idea. “You wanna go toss the ball around or something?” she suggested offhandedly. Apple Bloom hadn’t had anyone to do that with before, except the wall!

“Do ah ever!” Apple Bloom exclaimed, rearing up to kick in the air and whinnying happily, before charging off toward the farm house again. “Come on!” she shouted back to the slowpokes by the fence. “Y’comin’ or not?”

Before they came jogging after her, Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle shared a meaningful look, and Scootaloo said, “Do you want to tell her, or should I?”

They didn’t actually bring it up until much later, when a quiet whinny snuck out of Apple Bloom again as they settled down after their games later in the afternoon.

“You know it’s alright if you’re different,” Sweetie blurted out. To Apple Bloom’s regret, Sweetie added, “Really really different.”

Apple Bloom settled on her haunches saying tiredly, “What’s this about, Sweetie?”

“I’m just saying you still have what’s important,” she said, “And there’s nothing to be ashamed about, if those differences aren’t bad. In fact, I think they’re really neat!”

“What... differences, essactly?” Apple Bloom said, her mood dipping gloomily as she really did not like where this was going.

And Scootaloo went right there, saying, “So...... you can whinny now?”

Apple Bloom actually looked at her blankly at that, saying, “Um... no? When did I ever whinny?”

“Just now!” Scootaloo said, “And back at the horse corral. Can you do it again?”

Apple Bloom blushed, saying, “T-that wasn’t whinnying tha’ was–um... that was just a little giggle!” It wasn’t whinnying, right? She sounded different, but not that much like a horse, right?

“Try giggling again,” Sweetie said encouragingly, with full attention on Apple Bloom.

“Y-y’cain’t giggle on command, Sweetie,” Apple Bloom said nervously, her tail curling around the base of her thighs, trapping the dress against her. “Ah just don’t feel like it now,” she said a bit sullenly.

Her friends nodded at her understandingly. Then Scootaloo asked, “Hey Sweetie, do you think Apple Bloom is still ticklish on her belly?”

“Don’t you dare!” Apple Bloom exclaimed horrified, scrambling to her hooves even as the other two lunged for her. She put up a good fight but they totally had a size advantage, and also, she was ticklish on her belly. So it wasn’t long before even she couldn’t ignore the horselike noises she kept laughing out around her normal laughs, with those capable little white and pumpkin orange fingers sliding all up and down her belly, leaving her with no possible action other than wiggling helplessly on the ground.

She tried to laugh normally, she really did, but... they didn’t even care when she couldn’t, and some weird noise came out of her sometimes. They couldn’t possibly understand what it was like to have your own voice sounding different than you’ve always lived with, but at the same time they didn’t judge her, and it really did seem like they thought it was cool. They even managed to convince her to try it on her own, though it was hard to tell if Apple Bloom’s best effort was a horse noise, or just sort of clearing her throat, sort of. They said it sounded great though, so she’d have to take their word for it.

After they got done with that, and started sharing stories about school, school, and unending monotony respectively, Apple Bloom noticed her sister had gotten back from school, and was standing there talking with that new friend of hers, that flame haired girl who was a Dramatist if Apple Bloom recalled, some sort of mythological expert. Apple Bloom wondered if that Sunset lady was going to come over and gawk at her, or maybe be staying for dinner, but Applejack just gave her a ride back to the bus stop, and she left on her own. Applejack had the strangest taste in friends sometimes.

It got Apple Bloom thinking, though. There was one friend that Apple Bloom hadn’t seen, who didn’t have parents or sisters to drive her around places. When coming to pick up Sweetie Belle, Sweetie’s sister just kept her distance, kind of stared at Apple Bloom, like she had some kind of disease. But Rarity was still Sweetie’s family, and that meant something. Scootaloo was even better off, since Cheerilee didn’t seem to mind Apple Bloom being a horse. People like Ms. Cheerilee could just take the strangest things in stride, though Apple Bloom wasn’t entirely sure Cheerilee thought she was a person still. Some people were just... hard to convince of that fact.

But every one of her friends had someone to watch over them, someone to support them when they needed it, and drive them way out to Sweet Apple Acres, except for one. There was a third friend of Apple Bloom’s, who didn’t have any family, who couldn’t drive out to Sweet Apple Acres, and whom Apple Bloom hadn’t seen at all since she changed.

Dinner that night was delicious, one might needlessly add. Green beans, butter rolls and glazed ham, with Apple Bloom leaning heavily (but not totally) toward the green beans, and less toward the ham. It was funny how vegetables tasted so much better now, yet she still ended up eating a bunch of hay.

Apple Bloom didn’t understand how, or why her diet worked, or how she always had room for dessert, but she hadn’t gotten sick since she gave up trying to understand it, and just eating what tasted good seemed to work best. She was eating the same food she ever did, but just in a lot different amounts and proportions than she did before. That wasn’t really the subject of her concern tonight though.

“Can Diamond Tiara come over sometime, too?” Apple Bloom asked over a mouthful of green beans. “Like Sthweetie an’ hold on,” she swallowed, “Like Sweetie and Scootaloo?”

Applejack looked up from cutting the roast with her knife and fork (they pre-cut the bit of meat on Apple Bloom’s plate), and responded, “That new friend o’ yours? Ah don’t see why not. Do y’have the phone number of her parents by any chance?”

“Oh! Uh...” Apple Bloom bit her lip, her tail fidgeting conspicuously as she tried to figure how to say this diplomatically. “She don’t exactly have a phone, y’know because she’s all livin’ at the uh... you know she lives at the orphanage, right?”

“Aw, meadow muffins Apple Bloom, why didn’t you say so?” Applejack groaned in a disappointed tone. “That’s a mite bit more complicated.”

“Ah know, ah just–” Apple Bloom frowned, not sure why she was so dead set on getting Tiara over here to laugh at her. “Ah don’t know how well she’s gettin’ on with Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle, without me around,” Apple Bloom pondered carefully. “Her old friend’s always busy, and Scoots don’t like her much at all. So ah dunno how she’s been lately, and all. Diamond Tiara, ah mean.”

“Orphanage should have a director,” Granny Smith said instructionally. “Yer gotta call him, set up an appointment. They’ll have to schedule an inspection, make sure your house is a safe place to be in. Ah remember your great aunt Ethel took to an orphan as a friend when she was a little girl, an’ she had ‘em over all the time.

“That could take weeks, though!” Apple Bloom protested.

“It’s jus’ the first time,” Granny said with a sad smile. “Orphanages got a lot more rigamarole than straight out families do.”

“Y’got the whole rest of the school year,” Applejack said consolingly, “We’ll take care of that orphanage business, an’ you’ll be seein’ your friend before you know it.”

“Ah guess so,” Apple Bloom said uneasily, “I just feel like it’ll be a problem tom—sooner, than later, if I don’t do something about it.”

“Why’s that?” Applejack asked innocently enough. Trouble is, Apple Bloom could only stare at her remaining beans and say,

“Ah don’t know, just a feeling ah guess. She’s a lot more sensitive than she looks, ah guess, an’ I’m jus’ worried about... her.”

“Ain’t nothing we can do until tomorrow,” Granny said firmly. “So don’t worry yourself over it.”

“Okay Granny,” Apple Bloom said, “An’ thanks... an’ ah’m just gonna go watch the sunset, okay?”

Applejack leaned back saying, “Reckon ah might join you,” in a undecided tone.

“Any time you want,” Apple Bloom said, “But don’ take too long or you’ll miss the green flash.”

“Ah’ll be putterin’ around in the kitchen,” Granny said, standing up from the table. Apple Bloom left next, pausing to grab another mouthful of hay she could chew on her way, and trotted out to Promise Peak. It was safe for her to go without a word because everyone knew this is where she went to go stargazing and sunset watching. She’d done it more regularly since becoming a pony, mostly because she didn’t have homework to do, but also because she just needed a way to feel special, like something she could call her own will.

Apple Bloom enjoyed the sunset, watching it with her sister and brother, who climbed up the steep incline more clumsily than her light easy bouncing gait ascended it. Granny didn’t make the trip, but that was okay. The poor gal was hard set enough to move around normally, with all that extra weight on her. Still, Apple Bloom didn’t dawdle up here much longer past sunset. She charged down all the way to the farm house, and accosted Granny who was in the kitchen baking cookies. Not just to get free cookie batter, but also to remind Granny of how important she was to Apple Bloom. But also free cookie batter.

And Apple Bloom could get free cookie batter, because it wasn’t hurting her! Not as long as she didn’t eat too much, at least. But Apple Bloom was already in high school, even if she didn’t look it, and she was a mature and capable individual who could restrain herself from pigging out on cookie dough. No, really.

It was kind of silly in fact, because everyone had started treating her like a little kid again these days. They couldn’t help it, with how cute and little she was! She didn’t blame them, but she found it kind of annoying. Did Applejack really have to safety proof the corners on all the tables in the house? It was one time!

Soon, Apple Bloom nestled all snug in her bed, feeling full of vitality (and cookie dough) now that she figured what was wrong with her diet. She wondered about why she was a pony, and how she’d made it this far without something going horribly wrong. She felt inadequate from not having schooling or education, but her life was still worth a whole lot of something, if only it would just make a lick of sense. At least she slept well, and for the first time in many nights, she had a visitor in her dreams.

It was just an ordinary dream at first—well, not a nice one though. Apple Bloom had her Algebra and English books, except not only was she a tiny little pony, but they were even more huge, like the size of a whole wall of a whole room. She tried to lift them to read them, so she wouldn’t fail all her classes, but everyone just laughed at her because she couldn’t even open them. They started to topple over, and she had to brace on the ground to push them up, but she couldn’t push them up all the way, they were just too heavy. So she had to stand there, propping up her useless books that just kept weighing her down, while everyone just laughed at that stupid little pony over there.

She stumbled abruptly as the books tilted off her back. What? Who was saving her from her books? She watched in puzzlement, as the books glowed a sparkling magenta and flew through the air like they were possessed by a poltergeist. Apple Bloom looked on in amazement, as they went and flew up onto their proper place, on the shelves of a... library. Apple Bloom hadn’t even realized she had gone into a library, yet here she was. Surrounded by bookshelves, tall, sunlit windows, and the cozy smell of paper and wood.

“A little filly like you could probably use a picture book, instead,” came a warm, if somewhat snarky voice behind Apple Bloom. Apple Bloom turned and suddenly purple. She looked up, and... and it was that pony from before! The beautiful space princess!

“You’re here!” Apple Bloom exclaimed in amazement. Only then, did she notice beside the princess was a large, but not monstrous book, open to a page full of illustrations. It was floating in the air, somewhat intermeshed with the princess’s ethereal mane, the book wrapped in the same sparkling magenta light as the other books.

The princess tensed up at Apple Bloom’s gaze, saying, “I was... I... um... here.” , She deposited the book down before Apple Bloom with a thump. It was a little kid’s book, the sort that you’d find covered in crayon drawings, when you went to send it back to the library. Just a bunch of object lessons, drawn in full color illustrations. What made the book peculiar was, all the people in it were ponies! Apple Bloom flipped through it, seeing construction ponies, and delivery ponies, and teacher ponies, and... hey, did that delivery pony have wings?

Apple Bloom looked up at the space princess questioningly. She had wings too! Apple Bloom hadn’t realized it from looking at her. Something about the princess’s form was just impossible to comprehend, if you didn’t know what to look for first. She was like a majesty of ideas, that only resolved itself by convenience into a pony. A truly regal figure, with a power that bled in whispers of knowledge from every inch of her being, and she was... trembling?

“I was scared,” the space princess said shortly. “You got so scared the last time. Do you want to be with me?”

“Do I want to...” Apple Bloom stared uncomprehendingly.

“I said it wrong, sorry,” the princess said curtly, chewing anxiously at a wisp of her mane. “I just didn’t want to ruin it,” she explained. “You’re the first pony I have been able to find in a long time.”

“How long?” Apple Bloom asked eyes wide in curiosity.

The princess’s mane was quite a sight in its own right; the stars from the princess’s planetarium were in it, like not just projected on, but like her mane and tail were a gateway into that realm. They didn’t enter that realm just yet though, the firm foundations of this ancient looking library under their hooves for the time being. It looked like the princess needed this library around her... a reminder of some kind of stability in her life.

“I can’t remember,” the princess said in frustration. “I’m not used to this. I’m sorry. Can we be friends?”

Wha? “Ya wanna be friends with... me?” Apple Bloom said, trying to comprehend what she could possibly offer to such an incredible fantasy who stood before and all around her.

“Please, I’m so lonely,” the princess uttered in abrupt, torrid emotion, prostrating herself before Apple Bloom. The little filly had no words for how inappropriate this felt, as the princess of space ponies groveled at the feet of a little kid, saying, “I can bring you more books. I remember books! Were you studying? I remember studying! Do you need quills? We can do anything here! Just please, please, will you...” and she actually had tears in her eyes, as she laid an ebony shod hoof on Apple Bloom’s little pony chest. “Will you be friends with me?”

“I... uh...” Apple Bloom backed up, fighting to regain her wits about her. “Yeah...” she said in deliberation, “Ah mean, if you want to, that is. You really cain’t find any other uh, ponies?”

The princess didn’t seem to notice, but she was floating on a cloud now, the familiar starscape spreading around them like an opening door. “I...” she whispered, her brow twisted and she said, “I don’t think so... I haven’t tried in so long, but then you just came, and you’re here now! Are you the only one?”

Apple Bloom frowned, not entirely sure what she was standing on at this point. “I reckon ah am,” she said, “There ain’t any other girls turnin’ into ponies at any rate.”

“What about my friends?” the princess asked hopefully. “Are they alright?”

Oh so now she has friends? “Ah don’t know many people at school,” Apple Bloom said uncertainly, “Who are your friends?”

“I...” the princess trailed off again. “I don’t remember,” she said quietly. And that was all she said. It was an aching sadness that Apple Bloom could scarcely understand that she felt in that princess’s meaningful silence. Apple Bloom and she swam silently in a sea of stars.

“But I remember you!” the princess said, abruptly cheerfully, turning to look at Apple Bloom eagerly. “I remember you from just days ago! When you found me, and you were here!”

“I... uh... reckon...” Apple Bloom said smiling weakly, at a loss for words for this situation. She was beginning to suspect this princess was loonier than a cracked coconut.

“Please don’t hide from me,” the princess said urgently to Apple Bloom. “Everypony was hiding and I couldn’t find them, and now you’re here, so please, please don’t hide again.”

“I’ll do mah best,” Apple Bloom said reluctantly, “You’re real confusin’ though, ya know?”

“Confusing, right!” the princess crowed, “I can teach you! I can– no I can teach me not to be... I can remember I... yes I am confusing.”

She wilted with a miserable, “I’m sorry.”

And she really did look miserable, with her horsey shoulders hunched and hind legs splayed, and ears turned down and low. That’s why Apple Bloom, against her better judgement, walked, or... floated up to the princess, and wrapped her hooves around the princess’s neck, in as warm a hug as she could manage. Somehow, the glorious power that rolled through Apple Bloom’s bones like a thunderclap, at the mere touch of a space princess, still paled in comparison to what the space princess felt tonight from Apple Bloom’s simple gesture of consolation. She didn’t stop crying until Apple Bloom woke up.

Author's Note

Almost done with exposition, something should actually start happening pretty soon.

Laundry List

“Ah’m just sayin’ maybe you shouldn’t be jumpin’ to conclusions!” Applejack said with the four of them, sans Diamond Tiara, seated around the dinner table, which was now a round table discussion. “Ah know this whole pony thing has got your imagination riled up, but maybe this Diamond of yours just ain’t right in the head.”

“If she ain’t so right in the head,” Apple Bloom countered, “Then why is it all about horses? She knew, sis. When she saw mah horse ears she recognized them. And even if she is, it don’t hurt to be you know, careful about it right?”

“Careful about what?” Granny put in. “All she told yer was that Applejack was gonna change into a horse come the Fall Formal.”

“Pony,” Big Macintosh offered.

“Look now, if it was contagious it woulda gotten me already,” Applejack said resolutely. “If ah have any weird dream about some golden apple, ah’ll let you know, but otherwise it just ain’t gonna...uh...”

“...I don’t see how as it could happen,” Applejack concluded awkwardly.

“There was somethin’ else,” Apple Bloom said, “She said y’all were fighting a demon! Maybe you have to change into ponies or like, half ponies, to fight it or something.”

“Like a...” Big Macintosh glanced aside with a little blush, “Magical girl or somethin’?”

The silence ended with Applejack’s slow but hearty chuckle. “Tell you what sis,” she said amusedly, “Soon as ah find a magical locket that changes me into a horse girl you’ll be the first to know that our school is safe from the demons.”

“Ah’m serious, Applejack!” Apple Bloom said hurtly, “What if she ain’t crazy? What if she really is seein’ visions of the future?”

“She ain’t seeing visions of the future,” Applejack said flatly, “That’s just nonsense.”

“So is changing into a pony,” Apple Bloom mumbled, sulkily. Granny Smith lay a hand on her back, as Apple Bloom hunched there in her booster seat. The gesture did make her feel a little better, at least. But not much.

“Well,” Apple Bloom asked peevishly, “What is she seein’ visions of then? Visions of the past?”

“Well ah sure don’t remember turnin’ into a pony, the last Fall Formal,” Applejack said with a wry grin, “Diamond Tiara hasn’t even... she’s in her first year y’see, so she hain’t yet... uh...

“She hasn’t...”

“Yeah, I know she hasn’t attended one before,” Apple Bloom said with droopy ears to a puzzled Applejack. “Ah just don’t think that it’s safe to say it’s all in her head.”

“Not much evidence,” Big Macintosh pointed out, warningly.

“We can just ask her,” Applejack said reluctantly, “She’ll either give us somethin’ falsifiable, or she won’t be able to put up, and we can all go home without catchin’ the crazy, or the horse.”

“She has a hard time talkin’ about it,” Apple Bloom said, “Ah don’t wanna make her feel worse. She’s our guest after all!”

“Hmm,” said Granny meaningfully. All heads turned towards her. “Okay so here’s what we do,” Granny said, pulling them into a huddle, even if Apple Bloom had to stand on top of the table to participate.

Diamond Tiara woke groggily to the smell of horse. The pitch black night glowed dimly, from in through an unfamiliar window to her left. A moment of panic hit her, when she thought that maybe her roommates had done her even worse and snuck her into someone else’s bed so she’d get in more trouble for it, but... then she remembered whose bed she was laying in, and how she got to be there.Diamond lay her head back, and scrunched her hands against a forehead most generously endowed with messy purple tresses with white highlights.

Now she felt horribly guilty, again. Diamond Tiara had come all this way just to yell at Apple Bloom, and to get her back for ruining her life, and all Apple Bloom gave her in return was kindness. It was a kindness she didn’t deserve. She deserved friends like her roommates who never gave her anything without expecting something in return. She deserved friends who were too busy studying to spend time with you. And yet here she was, just lying in someone’s bed as if she owned the place.

She sat up all the way, and it got even worse. Something slipped down her chest and she grabbed it on impulse, pulling it up to look at it apprehensively in the darkness. It was a ribbon, no doubt a pink ribbon. Apple Bloom had even given her, her bow. It was the silliest, stupidest, most un-called-for, nicest thing. It made Diamond’s face scrunch up, and her eyes water. With a practiced ease, she crushed her urges as if with a cold steel boot heel, wiping off her eyes and standing up from the bed.

They even gave her snacks. That was just, like, that was something else. Diamond wondered how long it had been, because she was already fiercely hungry again. To make matters worse, the whole house was permeated with the smell of something delicious. Diamond fumbled across the unfamiliar room, seeking the light switch. Her legs were so sore from all that walking, but she didn’t let it stop her. They would feel better if she worked them out a little anyway.

It wasn’t too hard to find the switch, since there was a glimmer of light from the hall outside. She turned on the light only long enough to find the door knob, but didn’t stay in Apple Bloom’s room any longer. She just shoved the uncooperative door open, went out the hall and headed down the stairs. Diamond wondered if it was appropriate to weasel food out of someone, if you happened to be there during their dinner time. It was either that or be hungry though, an easy decision for a practical minded sort.

It was such a surreally idyllic scene that Diamond Tiara saw from halfway up the stairwell, staring over the bannister railing. Apple Bloom’s family were seated at their dining room table, the portly Granny Smith who worked the cafeteria, Apple Bloom’s lanky athletic sister, and her uncomfortably handsome brother. It wasn’t just that a real family was just ...sitting there in the warm orange light, chatting in quiet tones, but there on the floor beside them was a little pony Apple Bloom, fast asleep, with her head resting against some drawing paper ...and crayons.

It made Diamond Tiara wish—no, she was no dummy. Diamond Tiara had long since given up on the hope of being adopted, not this late in life. But the scene before her, while she didn’t allow herself to wish for it, it still reminded her wistfully of something she had a long time ago, so long ago that she couldn’t even remember it anymore.

She continued down the stairs, attracting the attention of the Apple Family. The elder Ms. Smith gave her an apologetic look, glancing down to Apple Bloom, saying in her quavering voice, “She tried ter stay up for you, but the poor thing was jus’ too tuckered out.”

“It’s... okay,” Diamond said uncomfortably, adding hastily, “Something smells like, really good?” Shoot. Was it appropriate to just ask for it, or was she supposed to wait for them to offer?

“There’s still some in the pot,” the elderly matron stated for Diamond, “It’s a mite cold, but yer welcome to have yourself a bowl.”

“Thanks,” Diamond said in a relieved tone, but stopped herself before moving into the kitchen, saying a bit more carefully to all three of them, “Thank you very much,” with as graceful a curtsey as Diamond Tiara could manage, while her everything was sore.

She headed into the kitchen. It was a lot smaller than she was used to but, then again she wasn’t working in it, like she was used to. Just a pot there on the range top, of some sort of a tasty stew, and on the counter a... plate left out for her, with a big hunk of torn off bread on it. Yeah this was really ...sappy. A girl’s gotta eat though. She got that, and a glass of water, filled from the sink. Armed with those, she turned resolutely to face the Apple family again.

Diamond Tiara ate in subdued silence, standing with her plate on the counter, because it just didn’t feel right to just sit down at a table full of that whole family. Their conversation earlier had died down, and they were all looking her way, like maybe they were expecting her to say something. “So, I guess you like, called the orphanage,” Diamond concluded reservedly.

“Now hold on there missy,” Applejack said, quieter than she’d have liked with Apple Bloom sleeping right over there. “You’re in a huge amount of trouble, but that don’t mean we gotta be in trouble too.”

“What do you mean?” Diamond Tiara asked confusedly. She didn’t let her confusion stop her from filling her rumbling belly any slower though.

“Those folks back at the orphanage, they really do care for you,” Granny Smith said worriedly.

That just made heat flare in Diamond’s chest, and she muttered, “No they don’t,” the moment those words hit her ears.

“They’re gonna be worried sick about you,” Granny Smith pressed, “Didn’t you think they wouldn’t notice you wanderin’ off?”

“Of course they’re going to be worried,” Diamond said snippily, “Only because I’m in trouble.”

“There’s good people workin’ there,” Applejack put in. “They really do care about you, and every one of the kids there.”

Diamond finished off her bread looking down thoughtfully. “Sorry, um... Applejack,” Diamond admitted reluctantly, “You’re right they do care about me. I just don’t think they like, care for me.”

An uncomfortable silence followed. Diamond tried not to interrupt it by slurping from her spoon, but Granny interrupted it anyway, saying,

“So we’re gonna drop yer off at the orphanage tomorrow mornin’, and ye can tell ‘em whatever you wanter tell ‘em. We ain’t callin’ them though, and we ain’t coverin’ for you. The thing is...” she paused in thought. Or sleepiness it was hard to tell. “If we tell ‘em you came all the way out here, then there’s no way they’d ever trust us enough to let you visit again.”

Diamond paused. “Visit?” she asked skeptically.

“Yeah, they’d think we’re a bad influence or somethin’, and we ain’t,” Applejack clarified assertively.

“No, I mean like–” Diamond carefully put her bowl down asking bemusedly, “You want me to visit?”

“Eeyup.” Three guesses as to who said that.

Applejack looked at Diamond a bit worriedly. “Apple Bloom does at any rate,” she said uneasily, “You’re her friend, and that’s good enough for me. Why wouldn’t she want you to come over?”

“She wouldn’t!” Diamond said erratically, “I mean, she would! I mean... there’s no reason she wouldn’t but... I could like, ask if... I like–I don’t know how it works, to be honest.”

“Well,” Granny mused, “What’d ye do the last time someone asked you to visit?”

Diamond paused, and answered bluntly, “I didn’t.”

At their uncomprehending looks, she swallowed the lump in her throat that wasn’t stew and said, “Like, I mean, nobody asked me to visit yet.”

“As of when?” Granny said uncomfortably.

“Um... ever?” Diamond offered a bit derisively. It was clear Apple Bloom’s blockheadedness was inherited. What did Diamond Tiara have to say? Nobody likes me? My friends don’t care about me? This is my first time in somebody’s house in my entire life since before I can remember?

“What about that Silver girl?” Applejack spoke up brightly, and too loudly, “Ah seem to remember you two were thick as thieves at one point.” That outburst was what woke Apple Bloom up it turns out, but it took awhile for them to notice, and for the pony to rouse herself. So Diamond continued,

“She like...”

Diamond didn’t continue.

Diamond wasn’t sure what to make of Applejack knowing about her and Silver’s increasingly tenuous relationship. “...we’re just friends at school,” Diamond finally decided to admit, “She never asked... I mean, it never, like, came up.” Not that Diamond Tiara was jealous or anything of Silver, with her own big house, and her own real father and mother, and her own fancy computer equipment to give her all the company she needs. No way, if Silver thought she was annoying and clingy it was Silver’s fault, and Diamond was perfectly fine with—what on earth is that noise?

Apple Bloom didn’t sound precisely like a goat when she was waking up, but she didn’t sound precisely like a human either. She murmured restlessly, and yawned, and her eyes cracked open. It was a quiet sound, but still enough of a sound to catch Diamond’s, and everyone in the room’s attention though. Diamond Tiara watched with barely repressed amusement as Apple Bloom looked around confusedly, and on spotting Diamond, her little baby horse eyes got as big as plates.

“Oh mah gosh ah fell asleep!” Apple Bloom squealed surprisedly, struggling woozily to her feet. She did it by jumping up on her front feet and bouncing forward to set her back feet down, and it would have been more impressive if her legs weren’t so tiny. Apple Bloom barely had any height to travel, between sitting down and standing up. Apple Bloom started to eke out, apologetically, “Ah’m sorry Di—”

“It’s fine, Apple Bloom,” Applejack cut her off saying, “You looked like you needed your sleep anyway.”

“But I’m no’...” Apple Bloom yawned despite herself, a big gaping yawn that you would never see a horse do. “I dunno why ah keep getting so sleepy!” she grumbled crankily, looking dimly at the ground. Diamond could not believe how terribly adorable that was. Horses weren’t supposed to look that cute! Apple Bloom wasn’t supposed to be that cute!

“We were just talkin’ about your friend here come visitin’ again,” Granny Smith said, leaving Apple Bloom’s little complaint to stand by itself.

“Oh goo...ood,” Apple Bloom said with another tired yawn. “When’s she (yawn) coming over...?” The poor little pony still looked asleep on her feet, practically.

“We’re workin’ that out now,” Applejack said, “You wanna uh, get on to bed now?”

“Ah’m fine,” Apple Bloom insisted, shaking her bowless head, trying to clear it and standing up straighter. Fat chance of that. Her tail started drooping right away, shortly followed by her head again. Diamond wouldn’t have been able to hold back a laugh if Granny hadn’t immediately started addressing the situation, attracting their immediate attention.

“Mah good sister Ethel had it all figured out,” Granny Smith pointed out in a practical tone, attracting Diamond’s attention, “We’ll just call the director and ask if you can come over. It might take a while, but it’ll happen, an’ it’ll be lots easier than what you did today!”

“Yeah, um...” Diamond squirmed uncomfortably at the mention of... what she did today.

Applejack meantime leaned forward on the table facing Diamond, saying, “We’re gonna let you off at the orphanage, and we ain’t gonna make no trouble. You can tell them what you want, but this ain’t somethin’ you can just brush aside. Somethin’ serious is goin’ on with you, and you have to address it. So ah want you to promise me you’re gonna tell someone about this. You talk to a shrink, right?”

Diamond felt like she wanted to wither away into ash, as she admitted bitterly, “Well, yeah?” trying to make Applejack sound like the dumb one for saying something obvious.

“They cain’t get you in trouble if you tell the doc about what happened today,” Applejack continued gently. “They gotta ‘confidentiality’ agreement and all. So ah need you to promise me you’ll tell them the whole truth, so they know that everythin’s not okay with ya.”

“Why should I?” Diamond whined, crossing her arms.

“Cuz then we won’t,” Big Macintosh said ominously.

Applejack shot him a nasty look, and then said to Diamond, “Because they can help you too, and there’s nothin’ wrong with that. You don’t wanna leave your problems all on the shoulders of poor little Apple Bloom here, do ya?”

Diamond looked at Apple Bloom, with a spear of guilt twinging inside her. “I guess not,” she said defeatedly. “Okay, I... Apple Bloom?” Diamond Tiara paused, looking at her pony friend perplexedly.

“Do you promise?” Applejack reiterated emphatically, not looking away from Diamond.

Diamond shot a glance at Applejack whispering harshly, “Yes, I—I promise. But look at Apple Bloom!”

All four pairs of eyes turned to Apple Bloom, who was standing there like she was listening to them, but her eyes were closed and her head was nodding slightly, and if you paid attention you could hear a quiet snore coming from her mouth.

Failing to suppress a chuckle, Applejack said “Well ain’t that just plum gravy,” in a tender sort of voice. “Ah think you two better get to bed. You got a long day ahead of you, and Apple Bloom is just plum tuckered out.”

“Ah think we should all git to bed,” Granny said, the chair protesting her weight as she stood up ponderously. “Ain’t much this gal got left in her tonight.”

“Sorry I like, kept you up or something,” Diamond said with a glance down at her plate and cup. “I’ll go wash these off,” she said, turning for the sink.

“Just leave ‘em in the sink,” Granny called after her. Diamond’s face scrunched up anxiously. She really didn’t know how to do this sort of thing. Carefully placing the plates in the sink and not doing any dishes in there like she was usually supposed to, Diamond returned to the dining area in seconds instead of minutes. There Granny was already heading (slowly) up the stairs to where the bedrooms were. Apple Bloom’s gorgeous brother, Big Macintosh was standing off toward the middle of the room, right before the little pony Apple Bloom, looking down at her standing there asleep with a pensive expression.

He bent over and wrapped his arm around Apple Bloom’s barrel, and then just lifted her bodily up into the air. The edges of her dress and her bright red tail waved limply back and forth in the air below her. The incredible thing is, she didn’t even wake up. She almost did, but her tail went limp again, and she just leaned insensately against his broad chest. Another murmur might have escaped her, but that was it. Somehow Apple Bloom’s brother managed to pick her up without waking her at all. It was like she was a little kid or something!

Diamond Tiara walked over shyly, before whispering to him, “You’re really good at that.”

“She’s good at stayin up too late,” Big Macintosh said simply, turning and walking up the stairs with deliberation. After looking at his back uncertainly, waiting for an invitation that didn’t come, Diamond Tiara crept up the stairs after him. She watched that brother of Apple Bloom’s lay Apple Bloom in her own bed, like she was a figure of the most delicate porcelain, pulling back the covers with one arm to lay her down on the soft sheets, and then pulling the covers right up to Apple Bloom’s tiny little horse muzzle.

He started to tiptoe away from the bed and stopped at the sight of Diamond standing there as if he forgot she was there. He straightened up again and looked her down uncertainly. Diamond Tiara found herself a bit lost for words, looking up at him with an increasingly racing heart.

“Guest room’s full of crates,” Big Mac said as if in explanation, or more likely apology. Diamond blushed at his even gaze, trying not to think about how handsome he was, or how sad it was he so rarely used his beautiful voice, or how kind he was or how good with kids he turned out to be.

All these things, she decidedly did not think about, instead saying, “That’s okay I don’t, like—” she cursed her stupid twisty tongue and repeated, “I don’t ...mind.” What did that even mean?!

He walked silently past the stiffly standing Diamond Tiara. The younger girl was still new to these sorts of feelings beginning to awaken in her, and the older boy’s feelings were as enigmatic to her as his thoughts and actions. She would never think of—with an upperclassman! He’d never... it would be inappropriate, and totally wrong. Still it didn’t hurt to appreciate, his um. Things she was not going to think about. He returned with an armload of blankets. Whu?

Big Macintosh returned to Apple Bloom’s room, with his arms full of thick blankets and a couple of pillows. He held them out to her, and Diamond took them, almost buried by them before she set them hastily on the floor. “That’ll be great like, um, Big... Macintosh,” Diamond Tiara said, not sure if she was supposed to call him by his name or not. But it’d be stupid to call him Mr. Macintosh.

He didn’t answer, just walking for the door again. It wasn’t like he was upset or anything. If anything, he was busy yawning. But he was so very infuriatingly quiet!

Then he paused halfway out of the room, turned his shoulders a bit and said, “Thanks.”

“Me?” Diamond asked uncomprehendingly. He nodded, and she said, “What for?”

“Bein’ there for Apple Bloom,” Big Mac answered, looking over at the poster bed in which a tiny horse was sleeping. “Not many care ‘bout what happened to her.”

She waited for him to explain himself, but he just turned to leave again, and Diamond blurted tensely, “Big Macintosh—!”

He paused to look over his shoulder. “You’re welcome,” Diamond , as gracefully as she could say with her brains apparantly leaking out her ears or something. He walked into the darkness then, and pushed the door almost shut behind him. The hall light turned on with a quiet flick.

Diamond only stood there a moment, then shook her head and went over to the light switch on her side of the wall. She flicked off the bedroom light, and in the darkness dragged the mass of blankets and pillows over to the side of Apple Bloom’s bed. It certainly wasn’t a sleeping bag, or a bed, but it would have to do. First, Diamond removed her precious tiara, and set it carefully on the dresser against the wall. Backing up a step from there to the blankets, Diamond Tiara removed her boots, and draped her socks over them. She unbuckled her jeans, sliding them off and folding them neatly. The air felt chilly on her bare thighs, but she wasn’t going to wear those things to bed. They were filthy!

Her jacket joined the pile of clothing beside her boots, leaving her with only an undershirt and panties. She hoped her outfit wouldn’t be too dirty to be salvaged. Those jeans were hand wash only. But, on second thought, they did match too closely with a color of her hair, and she was thinking of trying out some bolder colors. It was impossible to see any colors in the darkness of the room anyway, so she was limited to mere speculation at the moment. Shivering in the cool evening air, Diamond Tiara quickly crawled under the blankets, wrapping them around her like a cocoon.

Laying her head against the pillow, and already missing her evening shower, and already missing brushing her teeth, Diamond Tiara wondered how on earth she got into a mess like this. It wasn’t her fault that demons were attacking, and people were turning into horses! But maybe she could have handled it a bit better. Seemed like a good idea at the time, but it just wasn’t something she could imagine a real girl, with a real family would ever do. Apple Bloom had shown her that much was true, at least.

And now Diamond Tiara couldn’t even sleep! Her back was awkwardly arched and her bottom was getting sore, so she turned on her side, but that just pushed the bony part of her hip into the floorboards. She laid on her back again, then sat up dissatisfiedly. She looked at the bed. Before you knew it, Diamond was right over by the bed, just barely peering over its edge. With her eyes adjusting to the darkness, she could see the sleeping form of Apple Bloom laying there dimly in the cool moonlight, a tiny lump under the sheets. Apple Bloom looked so small on that great big bed. It was way too big of a bed for just one little pony. Diamond pondered deeply whether she might have a solution for this terrible tragedy.

“I’m going to regret this,” she muttered under her breath. Inhaling, she quickly ducked under the covers, and then with a silly, self indulgent smile, Diamond Tiara carefully crept up onto the bed. Whether it was Apple Bloom’s somnolence, or Diamond’s carefully honed skill of getting into the bed without disturbing the covers, Diamond sank into that nice bed again, with nothing more than a slight creak of bedsprings, and nobody or... nopony awoke.

Diamond Tiara was shocked to discover the amazing fact that a bed was softer to lay on than the floor. After all, it’s not like she hadn’t already known how wonderfully soft Apple Bloom’s bed was, from laying on it just a half hour ago, so it came as a total surprise of course. Totally. And her hypothesis was entirely correct. There was plenty of room for both of them to sleep on it. In fact, it wasn’t even a twin bed. It was a queen or a... whatever those big beds are called with space for two pillows, and two whole girls, and certainly space for one girl and one little pony girl.

So Diamond Tiara settled off to sleep again, with a pleasantly full belly, and the luxurious feeling of resting one’s aching limbs in a soft bed. It was probably the best bed she’d ever laid in. It sure was softer than the stiff mattress back at the orphanage. It didn’t smell smoky either, like her bed did from the one time her roommates tried to set it on fire to prank her. They acted like it was her fault they were so mean to her, but really she was just getting them back for what they were doing. It’s not like they didn’t deserve to be torn down emotionally, since they did it to her. At least, Diamond Tiara was pretty sure that’s how that worked.

She dreamed that night, as usual, of her parents. Diamond couldn’t blame them for whatever ended her up in the orphanage. Something must have happened to them; she knew they wouldn’t just abandon her. What little she could remember was in the dream, of running and fear, and her father with such a worried look on his face. And then he was gone, like all the rest of them. She dreamed of her mother too, well, at least what her mother had felt like. Diamond couldn’t even remember what her mother’s face looked like anymore.

It wasn’t a sad dream she had. It ended with them both hugging her and sitting on either side of her, and... fireworks or something. It was all very indistinct, but it was a very tender and loving experience. So Diamond was always puzzled why she woke up from these dreams with tears on her face. She did wake up though, very early in the morning after not sleeping long, probably because of her earlier nap.

When Diamond Tiara slid her eyes open, the world outside the open curtains to Apple Bloom’s window was still pitch black. There were some birds chirping outside despite the darkness, making quite a racket for such little things, but beyond that not a sound to be heard. Diamond found herself puzzled by the feel of a soft warm weight on her belly, and of her hand resting on something even more terribly soft. Diamond then remembered was not alone in this bed. She lifted the covers with her free hand, blushing hotly at what she saw.

Diamond Tiara wasn’t really a touchy feely sort of person. She didn’t mean to grab Apple Bloom that one time when she was crying. It just sort of happened. Apple Bloom just looked too much like a teddy bear to not go for it, when one was desperate for some comfort. Diamond had been surprised then, though probably shouldn’t have been, that instead of lemon yellow skin, Apple Bloom had a short and very dense coat of lemon yellow fur all over her body. But once she got over her surprise, Diamond just couldn’t help but enjoy the feel of it, stroking the part of Apple Bloom not wrapped up in that dress, until she’d passed out from exhaustion.

And, she didn’t mean to do this either.

Either her or the little pony girl had unconsciously made their way over to each other, some time along the course of this past night, and Apple Bloom was now half lying across Diamond Tiara’s bare midriff in the crook of Diamond’s arm, with Diamond’s own hand laying agaisnt Apple Bloom’s dress, to cradle around her friend’s furry horse body. That’s what Diamond Tiara woke up to.

Her first thought was how velvety soft Apple Bloom felt. It did remind Diamond of a teddy bear, of her old teddy bear, that she couldn’t sleep with anymore because her roommates were watching. Her second thought was how unlike a teddy bear Apple Bloom was. Apple Bloom was much firmer, yet with more give to her skin, and her body just radiated heat. The tips of her hooves were rough where they lay against Diamond’s belly, but everything else was so soft and warm. Her midsection regularly rose and fell with the rhythm of her slow breathing.

Diamond’s third thought was how much trouble she would get in, if Apple Bloom woke up while they were together like this. In the end, the sheer humiliation of ruining her image was what made Diamond squirm out of bed like an earthworm. She was too hasty though, and if Apple Bloom wasn’t well rested before, she sure was now, so as soon as Diamond Tiara landed on her butt on the floor with a very dignified squeak, she heard Apple Bloom coming awake in response.

“Diamond Tiara whassa...” Apple Bloom slurred sleepily, peering over the edge of the mattress. “Were you in mah bed?” she asked confusedly.

“There was– crates I mean, there were the guest room um,” Diamond stood up, fishmouthing intelligently. She must have looked totally ridiculous. She didn’t even have her clothes on. They were all folded by her shoes, and all she had to her name right now was a white undershirt and a plain looking pair of white underwear.

As a fashionist, Diamond Tiara was rather new to the trade, so she had enough trouble getting decent looking outerwear to even think about the unthinkable situation of needing an attractive pair of panties to show off to anyone. Well, at least it was dark, so neither of them could see anything. Diamond’s reputation was preserved! Meh, whatever.

“You know, it’s okay if you were,” Apple Bloom said, with a soft tender overtone to her voice that surprised and flustered Diamond.

“Oh please, gag me with a spoon,” she said, blushing and cringing away, feeling a bit shameful about being so exposed like this, despite the darkness of the room.

“Ah’m just saying,” Apple Bloom insisted, “This ain’t gonna be between any other than just the two of us.”

That actually made a sigh of relief escape Diamond’s tense form. “That would like, um...” She didn’t know what to say, so she just started picking up her outerwear. They felt as dusty and filthy as when she took it off last night, obviously. She shook out her pants experimentally, wincing at the dust. She shouldn’t do that inside.

“Ugh,” Apple Bloom said groggily, landing on the floor with a clop, and trodding out from behind the other side of the bed. “Ah slept in mah dress,” she croaked, “Now it’s even worse.” Her silouette travelled smoothly toward the wall, where she reared up on it like a cat on a scratching post, stretching upward until Diamond could tell what Apple Bloom was doing. The overhead light flicked on. Diamond immediately blushed and held her pants close against her, blocking the view of her almost bare hips.

She didn’t think it would ever be a problem not having any fancy panties, yet now that she had her underclothes in plain sight, Diamond was surprised by how humiliating it was to have nothing to reveal, besides just plain white blah. It was super obvious too, because of how it clashed glaringly with her bright pink skin. Apple Bloom didn’t even seem to notice though, if she cared.

The little oddly colored pony was looking positively wilted, with her hair lying loose, and her untied bow dangling loosely from one hoof. Her other three hooves hobbled along away from the wall in a limping gait. That filthy dress of hers was plastered against her sweaty hindquarters. Diamond looked down at her own very dirty pants and jacket, and then back at Apple Bloom, and then looked at the dark night outside Apple Bloom’s window.

This was a terrible idea. A terrible awful naughty idea. She’d be a laughing stock if she was ever found out. Diamond Tiara wanted to giggle like a grade schooler. She pulled her pants away from covering her groin, deliberately holding her clothing from covering her. She balled up her fists on her hips and said chidingly to the pony, “Apple Bloom, you need to wash that smelly old dress right away.”

“I cain’t,” Apple Bloom whined, somewhere between puzzlement and irritation. She hadn’t even noticed yet! “Ah told you it’s the only clothes ah got.”

“So?” Diamond said snidely, “Just take it off to wash it! You don’t need it anyway.”

“Well I just,” Apple Bloom kicked her hoof along the ground with an adorable pout, “Ah don’t wanna be indecent or nothin’”

“I need to wash my clothes,” Diamond pointed out, casually holding up the dirty pants in her fist, “And they’re the only clothes I have, so... what’s the problem?” She smiled cheekily as Apple Bloom’s puzzlement turned to realization, and then a full on blush right beneath that fur on her face, when Apple Bloom realized she was looking at Diamond Tiara in her underwear.

“C’mon,” Diamond said crossing her arms boldly. “If I can do it, then you can. It’ll be fine! Your fur pretty much covers everything anyway.”

“It really don’t,” Apple Bloom muttered quietly, her tail going down. She looked aside discomfitedly. Wait, did she just imply... no, no Diamond was not going to entertain that thought. They were both girls, so it was okay. She was pretty sure that’s how it worked at least.

“Look,” Diamond said a bit angrily, fingering her waistband. “Do I have to take off my underwear too? Because I totally will!”

“No! No, you just– hold on one—!” Apple Bloom stammered, and frantically got out of her dress... somehow. It was an odd way to do it, that Diamond doubted a real horse would be able to accomplish. Apple Bloom slipped her stubby little front hooves into the body of her dress far too easily for a horse, and used them to push it up alongside her face, until her head popped in through the neck of the dress. Bloom tried to walk out of it backwards then, and tripped as it followed her. Finally she twisted about lithely to reach the base of her own tail, where Apple Bloom undid the cinch with her... teeth, allowing the dress to slip free from where it was fastened on her tail.

Yeah, it was very odd.

“There, see? That wasn’t so hard,” Diamond encouraged, as Apple Bloom stood there completely naked, gazing up at Diamond nervously. Diamond’s friend was down on all fours with ease, without a dress or a bow, looking just like a cute little pony, but also looking like her friend Apple Bloom. It was surreal, to say the least.

“Ah guess it’s... kinda fun...” Apple Bloom said, unable to stop a shy smile from flitting across her so very expressive face.

Diamond smiled back saying quietly, “Hey I won’t tell if you don’t.” Apple Bloom smiled genuinely at that, clearly picking up on Diamond’s enthusiasm. “Now let’s get these washed,” Diamond continued, picking up Apple Bloom’s ...dress. Good grief this thing had seen better days when it was drapery! It held a stronger smell of horse than the rest of the room, what was no doubt what Apple Bloom really smelled like now. The smell wasn’t so bad actually, but Diamond still said “Pyew! Where’s your laundry room already?”

“Laundry room?” Apple Bloom asked confusedly.

That made Diamond a bit uneasy. “You know, where like... your washing machine is?” she ventured.

Apple Bloom laughed at that, “Oh we just get a wash basin outside and scrub it out a bit,” she said easily. Diamond Tiara had... never even seen a wash basin before outside of a children’s book. She had the feeling that this was indeed a terrible idea.

“Okay,” Diamond said crouching down excitedly, ignoring that nagging little voice in her head, “Let’s do it!”

The quiet of the early morning, before even the sky began to grey, was broken by a pair of giggles as two very different girls rolled a large wooden tub out from the back of the farm house. The pony one proceeded to gallop off, returning with a length of hose in her mouth. The human one put some amount of soap flakes in the tub and took the hose, while the pony ran back and turned it on. One of the girls was in nothing but her underwear, carrying her clothes out from the house in a bundle, and the other was in nothing at all, her only clothing a slip of dirty white fabric that she carried by pinching it in her teeth, and draping it over her backside.

Once the tub was full, the two of them both started scrubbing on old fashioned, but made to last washboards. It wasn’t the mechanized way to do things, but they were a ways from the city, far from any laundromat, and electricity was unreliable this far out. And washing machines used a hell of a lot of electricity. So, by the light of an electric porch light, they scrubbed their clothes by hand and hoof, in a soapy wash basin that wouldn’t have looked out of place a hundred years ago.

Diamond found it surprisingly enjoyable though. The act of scrubbing the clothes this way was a lot more satisfying than just staring at a machine in a laundromat, in a way that she didn’t really understand. Apple Bloom had no problems, certainly. Apple Bloom’s pony hooves were quite good at pushing cloth up and down on a ridged board, scrubbing it clean, even if Apple Bloom did have to climb onto the washboard entirely to reach properly. It was fun to watch her, what you could see of the pony in the porch light.

They kept at it until Diamond Tiara’s teeth were chattering, and she was shaking from shivers. The coldest hour of an early fall morning was probably not the best time to be outside in your skivvies. It was Apple Bloom who stopped things, looking at Diamond with concern and speaking up, saying in her little pony voice, “Diamond, you’re shivering!”

“I-I’m ok-kay,” Diamond insisted unconvincingly. “M-my arms a-are all w-w-wet an-nd i-it’s like f-f-ive s-so”

“Why don’t you come inside, and ah’ll get you a blanket!” Apple Bloom said starting to run for the house.

“W-wait!” Diamond shouted, making Apple Bloom pause on three hooves, looking back. “A-aren’t y-y-you c-cold?!” she stuttered out exasperatedly.

“Ah got fur!” Apple Bloom declared with a quiet stomp, “Now come on, before y’catch your death!”

Diamond meekly followed the little pony inside, whereupon Apple Bloom pulled one of the blankets off the chair. An odd twist of Apple Bloom’s neck made it flare out dramatically and drap right over Diamond Tiara’s shoulders. She didn’t want to admit it, but she was really grateful for that blanket right now. It was thick and scratchy, like wool. It was probably wool. While Diamond slowly chattered herself to warmth again, Apple Bloom ran back outside, to do something to finalize their clothes washing experiment,

Diamond Tiara hobbled back outside once she’d warmed up, wrapped head to toe in that wool blanket. , The grass was still cold and wet on her unprotected feet. She found Apple Bloom trying to wring out her own dress, a feat difficult for one pony alone. So they did it together. Diamond held it, while Apple Bloom twisted, until a ton of water had wrung out of it. Then Apple Bloom threw it over what looked to be a clothesline hanging between the house, and a pole attached to their fence. The daylight was slowly increasing outside, but it was still really hard to see things.

They repeated the process with Diamond’s clothes, though she winced at the state of her jeans and suspected that they might not be usable after this, despite being about as hand washed as they come. Then they both went inside, and Apple Bloom went and started stacking logs in the fireplace from a cradle full of chopped wood they had next to it, with her mouth! She showed Diamond where to stick the crumpled up newspaper so that it would feed the flames, and she checked the flue herself by biting on the handle and cranking it until she was sure it was open.

Diamond got to use the electric starter, but she got the impression Apple Bloom could have done that part too. It was honestly really impressive. It didn’t even look like Apple Bloom realized just how good she was at doing stuff as a pony. She didn’t even have opposable thumbs! Or fingers! But here she was teaching Diamond Tiara how to light a fire in a fireplace. It would have been a lie to say Diamond was so naive that she had never even seen a fireplace before, but she certainly had never been allowed to light one, or use fire of any sort for that matter. It was... an exhilirating experience, for such a simple act of lighting it.

Soon they were both sitting in front of the fire, Diamond more grateful for it than Apple Bloom, warming her numb hands in its cheery radiance. Apple Bloom just yawned cutely, and curled onto her side on the floor sort of like a cat, putting her back to be warmed by the fire and laying her head down on her hooves. Diamond just... couldn’t stand it. She reached down and stroked along that lemon yellow pony’s back. Apple Bloom was so soft.

“What’re ya doing?” Apple Bloom grumped irritably, sticking her head up when Diamond’s hand came down upon her flank.

Diamond startled and pulled back, but then she just explained, “Your fur is way too short to keep you warm, see?” And Apple Bloom totally bought it, pushing a hoof along the fur on her own hindquarters experimentally. She never even suspected Diamond actually enjoyed this. The perfect crime.

“Guess you’re right,” Apple Bloom said uncertainly. The two didn’t sit by the fire long before Apple Bloom pushed her head insistently underneath Diamond Tiara’s palm, and Diamond found herself stroking her friend again without even thinking about it. Diamond blushed heavily but... well, Apple Bloom wasn’t exactly asking her to stop. So that’s what she did for a while.

“Ah should get cold like this,” Apple Bloom said regarding her naked body, staring forward in contemplation. “Ah ain’t even got enough fur to fluff up much, except maybe on mah chest. It feels like a fur coat on the inside?”

“Your skin’s thicker,” came Applejack’s voice from beyond the firelight. Both girls looked back to see Applejack walk over to the two of them, still in her nightgown, holding a portable lamp for walking in the dark. Diamond pulled her hand away from Apple Bloom guiltily, but Applejack didn’t seem paying attention to her at all, saying evenly to Apple Bloom, “Fur’s only good for insulation so much, and when it gets wet, well...” She sat down by the fire beside the two of them, saying, “You’ll be glad for a nice layer of blubber when that happens.”

“So ah’m fat?” Apple Bloom whined in outrage, once again totally misinterpreting everything Applejack said, in a way that made being a pony look bad. She was such a blockhead sometimes.

“What about the ponies in the corral?” Diamond said to Apple Bloom teasingly, “They don’t mind the cold. Are they fat?”

“Those are horses!” Apple Bloom protested hotly. That actually made Diamond Tiara pause.

“...what’s the difference?” she asked uncertainly.

Apple Bloom hmphed, crossing her front hooves as if they were arms... sort of. “Ah’m not the same as them,” she insisted, “So ah gotta call it something.”

“Weren’t you more friendly toward the term space pony?” Applejack said sitting down on Apple Bloom’s other side, nudging with an elbow her sister, in her sister’s teeny little shoulder.

Apple Bloom nodded, then her eyes widened and she jumped to her hooves between them, in startlement. “Oh right, the space ponies! Crayons!” she shouted, then trotted off without another word, leaving Diamond Tiara looking at Applejack questioningly. Apple Bloom was only gone a few seconds though, so before Applejack could explain, Bloom came trotting back, looking pleased as punch, with that box of crayons securely held in her mouth. Diamond couldn’t even laugh with how completely appropriate that looked. And adorable. So unbearably, cheerfully adorable.

Dropping the crayons in Diamond Tiara’s blanket shrouded lap, Apple Bloom also pulled out a sheet of paper from ...somewhere... laid it in front of Diamond, and said smiling brightly, “Alright! So you’re real confused-like, so here’s the idea. Instead of tryin’ to tell us about what’s real or what’s not, and gettin’ all confused, why don’t you just draw what you saw? Dreamed? Whatever it is.”

Diamond would have answered, but she was busy trying to control her dark impulses.

Apple Bloom’s bright smile of triumph dimmed a little. Her ears went down, and she backed up a bit, kicking a hoof on the ground saying, “Ah was gonna ask ya to do it last night, but ah sorta ...fell asleep.”

“Apple Bloom, please,” Diamond Tiara begged tensely, “You’re killing me.”

“What?!” Apple Bloom said in a hurt and worried tone, looking up at Diamond with big scared eyes.

“I am trying so hard to not just hug you right now,” Diamond accused frustratedly. “Stop being so adorable!”

“...”

Applejack defused the tension by grabbing Apple Bloom around the midsection from behind, hauling her up in the air, and squeezing the struggling little pony so tightly Diamond could swear she made a sound like a squeak toy. “Aw, it’s alright,” Applejack said in a friendly tone, still pulling Apple Bloom into her lap, and mussing with her hair, “Apple Bloom knows full well the effect she has on us, an’ don’t let her fool you.”

“Ah wasn’t—tryin– ta–” Apple Bloom said, wiggling frustratedly.

“Now listen here Apple Bloom,” Applejack said in a serious tone causing the pony to immediately still. “You gotta treat your friends right, and there is nothing wrong with wanting a hug. She put Apple Bloom, down and gave her hindquarters a little boost in Diamond’s direction.

Apple Bloom grumbled behind herself to Applejack with a defiant pout, “Ah wasn’t gonna say she couldn’t hug me. Ah’m just not used to all this.”

“Well I don’t have to,” Diamond offered, downcast. “You don’t make it like, easy though.”

“It’s fine,” Apple Bloom groaned resignedly. “Ah would hug me too if ah was still human. Ah ain’t an animal, but ah ain’t the same as ah was. So there’s nothing wrong with... y’know...” She seemed uncertain of herself, and then just leaned forward and nuzzled Diamond Tiara’s right thigh with the side of her face, just a teeny little bit.

The fire alarm that woke the rest of the Apple Family was actually the squealing of a young girl downstairs, glomming passionately onto the cutest most adorable little pony creature friend of hers to ever have existed ever who currently appeared to be having problems breathing.

Every high school student has to wake up long before the sun rises. Between the time it takes to get ready, and school starting at a half hour after 7am if you’re lucky plus commute times... well, the Apple family had one of the longest commutes. So they had to be out of the house by 6:30. It was a tired routine they’d gotten lost in. A routine Apple Bloom had started to look at with more and more disdain, the longer she spent time away from school. Because with one of her siblings taking care of her, Apple Bloom and (well it was Applejack today) they had enough time and freedom to actually make a decent breakfast.

Pancakes, french toast, bacon, sausage, fresh sliced apples (go figure), there were so many delicious breakfast items that just couldn’t be prepared because of the rigors of high school. As Apple Bloom drizzled tons of syrup on her lonely pancake, whose batter she stirred, she recalled the early mornings before this started, her desperation to eat whatever you could cold and quick so she could hurry to the place that filled her with dread, because you could sleep just a little bit longer if you rushed breakfast that way. There was something terrible about treating breakfast like that, and it was a huge relief to be able to take some time and care, to make something fancy.

Apple Bloom couldn’t help but giggle at the sight of a, now a bit rumpled, but dressed Diamond Tiara, who didn’t even seem to know what to do with the food in front of her. She probably had like, a packaged breakfast or something at that orphanage. Or worse, was it like a cafeteria at the orphanage? Was every one of Diamond’s meals cafeteria food? At any rate, she clearly wasn’t used to fancy down home cooking, but once she got started she took to it with a passion. Diamond Tiara did a lot of things with a passion. Drawing, for instance.

As Apple Bloom headed toward the hay bale to top off her breakfast, she paced past the crayon drawing Diamond Tiara had made. It was exactly what Diamond talked about, with a weird demon girl all floating up there, and facing her off was Applejack and five others, also floating in the air. Well, probably floating. Diamond hadn’t drawn any ground or anything. Just those characters, and oddly that horse statue out in the front expanse you passed on your way to school. And like, little baby demons with shit eating grins on their faces.

Applejack had so many best friends: Apple Bloom really admired her for it. Apple Bloom herself had Sweetie, Scootaloo and Diamond, but she admired Applejack’s friends too, all of whom were participating here in this magic horse defense thingy. There was Rarity, who Apple Bloom knew really well through Sweetie Belle, and there was Rainbow Dash, whom Apple Bloom knew really well through the daily reports on her awesome feats by Scootaloo, and also that one time she helped at their bake sale. There was that ecologist, the animal shelter girl that Applejack said was so shy, and that rocker who also helped bake at the bake sale and...

Apple Bloom squinted at the drawing, then picked it up in her mouth and turned around, trotting over to the breakfast table. Relatively unnoticed by the others down on the floor here, Apple Bloom wiggled her hindquarters and jumped right over the back of her chair, landing neatly on the strapped down (that had been an entertaining lesson to learn last week) booster seat. That caught everyone’s interest. Spitting the paper out on the table, arranging so that it slid right up to Applejack, Apple Bloom said, “These are all your friends, right?”

Applejack put down her fork and nodded. “That’s right. Just like I said before.”

“Well ah recognize Rainbow Dash,” Apple Bloom listed off, “And Rarity, and uh, Pinkie Pie and uh... the animal shelter girl...”

“Fluttershy,” Applejack prompted.

“Fluttershy, right,” Apple Bloom said gratefully. “And here you are, and... you all got like, horse ears and tails and you’re fightin’ the demons.”

“You make it sound so ridiculous!” Diamond protested shrilly, throwing down her fork. “I’m telling you I just drew what I saw! I didn’t believe it either!”

“That’s not what ah’m concerned about,” Apple Bloom said, shooting Diamond an irritable glare.

“Well, what’s the big deal then?” Applejack asked, picking up her fork and taking another big bite. “Ah thold you, ah don’t remember anythin’ like that happenin’ before,” she said around a mouthful.

Apple Bloom frowned at Applejack, then tapped the center of the drawing, saying, “Who’s the purple girl here? Right in the middle there. Is she one of your friends too?”

“Yeah she—” Applejack ...halted. She’d been doing that a lot, lately. Applejack finished her mouthful, and put down the fork, leaning to look closer at the drawing again. “She’s uh...” Applejack said uncertainly, “I don’t rightly know, but she looks familiar for some reason.” She looked over at Diamond, asking “Who is she, Diamond Tiara?”

“Uh, me?” Diamond said abrasively, not wanting to be put on the spot by far. “I don’t know her. I’m just drawing what I saw. You don’t know a purple girl?”

“Ah suppose it could be... Ms. Cheerilee?” Applejack puzzled at the drawing. She glanced at Diamond, saying “You know there’s a shade of magenta in the crayon box, right?”

“It wasn’t Ms. Cheerilee,” Diamond said uncomfortably. “It was just a girl, in your class I think, I mean, I don’t know. It just happened.”

“She really is this shade of purple,” Diamond said, pointing at the purpled one, “Not magenta. She also had straight hair, but... oh! Magenta!”

While the others watched confusedly, Diamond scooted away from the breakfast table and jogged over to grab the box of crayons, running back with two colors, that she then drew, one line after another in the middle of the girl’s hair. “She had like these really cool highlights,” Diamond explained, “Like a violet and a magenta stripe in her hair.”

Author's Note

In which, shocking everyone, absolutely nothing useful is revealed!

Chasing the Apple

“I wish I could help more, really I do,” the dream princess said sincerely to Apple Bloom. The two of them were sitting on a grassy hill overlooking the sunset. The princess loved this scene the most. She was so skillful at pulling imagery out of Apple Bloom’s head just by talking with her about her life and what she was dreaming. It was really sad though she’d even forgotten what grass feels like! Or something to that regard. Apple Bloom wasn’t entirely sure what went on in that pony princess’s head, only that her trip through space had left her alone for a very, very long time.

About the only thing the princess had memories of were that library she liked to dream about with Apple Bloom. It was a beautiful memory, to her credit, but most of the books were all blank now. All those books. She really had been lost and lonely for longer than Apple Bloom could even comprehend.

Now they dreamed not of the musty smell of ancient books though, but instead they dreamed of Apple Bloom’s memories. They rested there on a hill in somewhere, out in the crisp clean open air, atop a field of verdant grass. The princess loved being outside if for no other reason than the novelty of it, spreading her angelic wings to bask in the warmth of the sun, or what Apple Bloom knew as the sun felt like.

“It’s okay,” Apple Bloom told the space princess, with regard to the picture they were looking at. It was hovering right there in front of them, held there in the princess’s space powers, which she said she really had in real life not just dreams, maybe, she thinks, probably. “I don’t expect you’d know much of earthly affairs,” Apple Bloom consoled her with a hoof pat on her seated hindquarters. “Ah still think this has somethin’ to do with your comin’ though.”

Apple Bloom never had any trouble speaking here, or walking for that matter. Not that it was a huge problem anymore, back in the waking world, but dreaming always made things nice and simple. Apple Bloom found she dreamt a lot differently now that she was a pony. It was more like she was really there, and less like a sort of chaotic mishmash of unfocused thoughts. It was more like having a little story in her head, and it didn’t fall apart as easily as when she dreamed before. When the princess was around, it didn’t fall apart at all.

This portrait wasn’t all blurry and indistinct like the other night, because Apple Bloom made sure to take a good long careful look at it before going to bed this night. No, this time it was a picture perfect copy of the drawing Diamond Tiara made. If anyone could prepare them for that demon attack, Apple Bloom knew the space princess would have something to do with it. Or so she thought, until she brought it before the princess who had no recall of it whatsoever.

“Who is the um, ‘human’ in the center here?” the princess asked, pointing a hoof at the floating sheet of paper in front of them.

“Nobody knows,” Apple Bloom said with an air of mystery, “Applejack and her friends are searching for someone like that, but they ain’t found nobody yet. And I cain’t exactly go lookin’ through the school mahself.”

“I wish you would,” the princess said in a sympathetic tone. “You sound awfully lonely too, stuck on this farm of yours.”

“More bored than lonely,” Apple Bloom admitted, “Mah friends still come around once and a while, and ah told you all about the one who drew that.”

“Hmm, still,” said the princess, with a twitch in her wings that Apple Bloom had come to understand was an expression of dissatisfaction.

“Ah know,” Apple Bloom said glumly, “But I just cain’t go back to school or into town or nothin’. Humans are an awfully skittish bunch, and it wouldn’t take much to rile them up into a panic. It just wouldn’t be safe. They’re all fine with me stayin’ at the farm, and ah’m also fine with...”

“With...” said Apple Bloom, unable to say what she wanted to say without feeling all choked up about it.

The princess blew over Apple Bloom’s head, dissipating the dark cloud that had formed above it. “Ah guess it is kinda botherin’ me,” Apple Bloom admitted softly.

“I wish there was something I could do,” the princess said, laying a tentative hoof across the teeny little pony’s lemon yellow flank.

“Don’t you worry, princess,” Apple Bloom told her, confidently. “It ain’t no problem to deal with for me, and ah’m happy ah got the chance to keep you company, wherever you are way up there in space.”

“I still don’t know if I’m a um...” the princess tapped her chin with a hoof in thought, “’Space’ princess,” she emphasized a little disparagingly, with hoofy air quotes.

“But just look at your mane,” Apple Bloom said insistently, poking at the oddly rubbery thing. “It’s fulla stars!”

“Well, maybe I’m a princess of space,” the princess said, “But I’m not sure if I’m in space. How would I even stay up there?”

“Your space magic!” Apple Bloom said confidently.

“To lift myself?” the princess countered. “And why would I even be in space in the first place?”

“On your way here, I guess,” Apple Bloom said uncertainly. “From your home planet?” The princess groaned and rolled her eyes.

Changing the subject the princess drawled out in an unconvinced tone, “You know, speaking of my mane,” hoofing at the ethereal thing casually, even carelessly. “What about these colors,” she asked Apple Bloom, “Right at the bottom here?”

Apple Bloom took a look, as little as she could understand what she was looking at. “It looks kinda like a sunset ah guess,” she said after a pause, “You know, like how on clear days the light stays on the horizon, when the stars start to come out?”

The princess nodded, but pointed her hoof at the drawing again, saying, “They’re the same color as this, though. The stripes in this human’s hair. And her hide is the same–”

“Skin,” Apple Bloom prompted.

“Her skin is the same color as my fur,” the princess corrected herself. “I wonder if we’re somehow connected?”

Apple Bloom peered at the drawing, and then the princess and said, “You know... I think you might be right!” She squinted again, trying to figure out what the princess’s fur color would be called. Purple? Was that it, or was Apple Bloom just thinking that was it?

“It’s still kinda hard ta see you,” Apple Bloom conceded unhappily.

“Yeah, I sort of forgot what I look like, sorry,” the princess herself conceded sheepishly. “I think I look like that, right? Maybe... no, you’re right.” With a whoosh the princess turned like, pink polka dots or something. “I’m just making it up on the spot,” she sighed frustratedly, idly chewing on a loose bit of her ethereal mane, “Because I really really wish I could be that human girl.”

“Because you could wake up?” Apple Bloom prompted.

The princess nodded and grinned, “Got it in one.”

“I thought ah couldn’t see you because you were all... mystically and stuff,” Apple Bloom confessed, a bit embarassed. “Didn’t think you might not be able ta see yourself.”

The princess lifted her head at a sound Apple Bloom could not hear. Apple Bloom knew what that meant though.

“Ah’ll keep my eye out for her!” Apple Bloom exclaimed, jumping to her hooves as everything shifted around her unsteadily, like a movie projection. “If ah see a meteor landin’,” she shouted, “Ah’ll know what to look”

“For,” Apple Bloom said out loud into the quiet morning, opening her eyes to the dim light of dawn.

Apple Bloom was really starting to look forward to these dreams, with the space princess. Even if they just sat around and talked about stuff, it was a break in the monotony. They were unreliably infrequent, which didn’t make much sense since the princess wanted the company, but she just explained it was too easy to get distracted for a few... weeks or the like. Her meteor had been travelling through space an awful long time for her to forget all that stuff, so Apple Bloom figured she just had sort of skewed perception of time. Or something. Apple Bloom didn’t pretend to understand the mind of a space dream princess.

Apple Bloom’s days had been otherwise worryingly simple, and the scary thing is, Apple Bloom was sort of starting to feel okay about that. She didn’t want to get used to this. She had things to do, and careers to plan for. For getting stuck on the farm all day to affect her so much, it was worrying to say the least. As the days went by, Apple Bloom was starting to lose sight of why she ever went to that high school in the first place.

Apple Bloom had thought the reason was her ambitions, and her goals in life, but when she reflected on it, she just didn’t see how school was going to help her there. It wasn’t going to help her explore, and it was teaching her new things but, half of them just didn’t make any sense to learn. She wished she could get away from the farm, but what she was missing the most wasn’t school, it was people. Her friends. Her friends!

Today was a weekend, and a day that they all had to spend time with her! She rose up onto her hooves, and bounced like a spring right out of bed. There on the floor, Bloom hurried to the dresser where not one, but three dresses were laid out now. Dresses might have been a generous term, as everything Apple Bloom could possibly wear would count as a dress. At least Apple Bloom couldn’t fathom how an article of clothing with legs could fit around her butt, the way her legs pointed down, now. But it turns out, as admirable as Big Macintosh’s sewing efforts were, they just didn’t compare to the work of a real Fashionist. Or, at least her apprentice, with a lot of help from her.

Apple Bloom hadn’t realized what a godsend Diamond was, until Granny finally got permission and Diamond Tiara got to come over again. Diamond spent the whole time wrapping Apple Bloom in a bizarre complex of measuring ribbons and fabric, trying to figure out how to adapt clothing to Apple Bloom’s strangely shaped form. Diamond made a veritable bible of notes on Apple Bloom’s measurements, and Apple Bloom really didn’t understand why you needed that many measurements, but it worked out pretty well in the end.

To a degree, Diamond’s enthusiasm was a sad consequence of the relief she felt at the very sight of Apple Bloom’s odd transformation. She was so relieved that something about her weird craziness—which wasn’t weird craziness mind you—was out there where she could see and touch it. But Apple Bloom liked to think it was also because she was Diamond’s friend, and sort of understood her irascible ways. One way or another, it meant that Apple Bloom had some actual clothes now.

It was going to be an interesting day for sure, with the four of them together. It would be for the very first time since that fateful day in the cafeteria, when Apple Bloom showed up with horse ears. But first she had to pick out what to wear.

She uh, had more than three pairs of panties of course. Trip to the ...baby store took care of that. Or wherever they got these tiny pink things, because Apple Bloom couldn’t exactly follow along with them to the shop.

Apple Bloom’s white, er, formerly white dress was now deliberately dyed a fetching shade of green, which did a lot better job of covering up the grass stains than white. But Diamond and her “mysterious tutor” in the fashion industry had put together two other ensembles, that Apple Bloom could wear when her current clothes were dirty or otherwise overused.

One was a bright pink dress, with little white polka dots all over the backside of it. A bold coloring, but Diamond said it reduced the contrast between Apple Bloom’s hair and her ...fur, so Apple Bloom was okay with that. It was the same color as her bow! Really, she figured Rarity had gone all out on this one.

It had a slot for her tail instead of a cinch, and draped just down to her barrel, where it could be tightened snug with a little belt down there. There was some sort of frilly curvy thing sewn into it, that ended up atop her back when she wore it, like a flower or something. Diamond would only say that it looked very appropriate, whatever that means.

It was real fancy, but Apple Bloom only had to wear it for special occasions, not that there were any special occasions. She had a sneaky suspicion that Diamond and she who must not be named just wanted to make something pretty. But that was okay too. Apple Bloom just wished it extended to treating her like a person. Nevertheless Apple Bloom was not going to wear this pretty thing, if it meant running around in the dirt with her friends, and getting all filthy.

The third, final article of clothing was what Apple Bloom put on. They solved the pants problem by taking out the legs entirely, and it was an otherwise scarcely modified design on a pair of overalls. They were a durable blue denim, and fit snugly around her rear end like a teardrop, the suspenders on the front were easy to pull snug against her shoulder... er...

...against her whithers, so that the whole thing wrapped around her like a glove. It was easy to get into too: you just had to walk backwards, and step through the leg holes, then pull it up along your body by the suspenders with your teeth.

Apple Bloom was using her lips and teeth for lots of crazy things these days.

So, securely snug in her denim suspender overalls, Apple Bloom pulled open the door with her... yeah her teeth, and charged down the hallway skipping steps on the way down. “Is it time? Are they here yet? Are ya up? Are you—”

Then she remembered, and Apple Bloom stuttered to a halt. She walked sort of cautiously diagonal then, into the dining room, all quiet-like. Big Macintosh was down there at the table, but Applejack was still upstairs asleep. Apple Bloom’s sister had been up late all night last night, for the big quarterly exam this Friday, as well as the state qualifiers for track and field. Plus that big project due earlier in the week, that had gotten her way behind in everything else. Apple Bloom sort of felt like all that was her fault, on account of Applejack missing so much school. It did seem kind of low down for Applejack’s teachers to assign so much stuff at once though.

But regardless of the debate of the fairness of it all, Applejack really needed her sleep this morning, so even when Apple Bloom tip-toed into the dining room as quietly as she could, she sorta came hollering downstairs, so Big Mac still looked down at her irritatedly and said, “You’re gonna wake her up!”

“Sorry I was yelling,” Apple Bloom whispered apologetically, “Ah was just so excited. Haven’t seen Diamond Tiara since last week, and haven’t seen the rest of them since two!”

He smiled a little, reaching down to ruffle at Apple Bloom’s hair. He didn’t have to reach too far though, not like she was a doll or anything. It was still scary how accustomed to being below the table she had become. Apple Bloom couldn’t even remember what it was like seeing the top of it when she stood beside it. She hopped up on her booster, not to eat this time, so much as just to talk with her brother at a relatively equal eye level.

“You don’t think she woke up, did you?” Apple Bloom whispered, looking at the ceiling with concern.

“Nope,” Big Macintosh answered easily, leaning back in his chair as he eyed the ceiling, “Ah don’t hear no swearin’”

Apple Bloom was up way early of course. Nobody was going to get up at daybreak, on the weekend after all! She fixed herself some breakfast though, and by that she meant she drank some water and ate some hay. It wasn’t long before Granny Smith came down, followed a good deal after the sun was in the sky... by a groaning Applejack.

“Ah don’t know what’s more sore,” Applejack half joked, over their official breakfast, “Mah hamstrings or mah brain.”

Their breakfast done, the sun in the sky, the day warming up, there was little left for Apple Bloom to do but wait. Wait and worry out front for her motley crew of friends to arrive.

Apple Bloom stood aside warily, as the automobiles bearing her friends began to show up. Diamond Tiara came last, because she got a ride from the Apple family truck. Applejack did good job of picking her up at the orphanage and carting her over here, but that did mean she was arriving last. First, it was Cheerilee’s beat up old beamer that crunched down the road to the farm. Scootaloo jumped out as soon as it came to a stop, running up to Apple Bloom excitedly exclaiming her name.

“Hey, Scootaloo!” Apple Bloom answered all casually up to her eager friend. She stuck her head around behind Scootaloo’s legs and said, “Hey uh, Ms. Cheerilee...” regarding her nervously.

The lady Cheerilee stood from her position at the driver’s side door, and gave a nervous little wave. “Hello there, ...Apple Bloom,” she said awkwardly, “You’re looking um, well.”

“Where’s Sweetie Belle?” Scootaloo asked from behind Apple Bloom, crossing her lanky arms and looking around.

“She ain’t here yet,” Apple Bloom said, “Ah gotta wait to greet her, but you’re free to go inside if’n you want. There’s some snacks in the kitchen.” She added in an exaggerated whisper, leaning up towards Scootaloo, “An’ ah don’t mean the bale of hay.”

Scootaloo laughed and blushed at the same time somehow. “That was one time,” she said jokingly.

“Come on, you two!” Granny Smith called to Cheerilee and Scootaloo from the front porch, “There’s biscuits and cider and a warm fire a waitin’!”

Scootaloo started to follow her mom in, but turned at the last second, saying to Apple Bloom nervously, “Are you sure you want to...?”

“Yeah,” Apple Bloom nodded a bit morosely. “She’s gotta get over it some time. An’ ah wanted to greet Sweetie too, and Diamond.”

“I could stay, um...” Scootaloo fidgeted glancing at the aroma filled farm house.

“No it’s better if ah’m alone, ah think,” Apple Bloom said, “You just get yourself some vittles. Ah’ll be right along in just a sec.”

Scootaloo’s attitude had Apple Bloom a little more worried than when she started out. This was the part of her transformation she really hated more than anything. But hate it or not, standing there in her new denim overalls with her favorite bow now clipped neatly into her mane, as human as humanly possible, Apple Bloom waited calmly for Sweetie Belle’s ride to pull up.

Rarity drove a bit of a tuna boat. A long and sleek if slightly beat up sedan it was. She got it for a steal, thanks to some quick thinking on her friend Sunset’s part. For Sweetie Belle and Rarity’s ...situation it was real important to have steals like that, too.

The sedan came to a halt beside Cheerilee’s vehicle, and in it Apple Bloom could see both Rarity and Sweetie Belle’s heads peering over the dash. Rarity left the engine idling. Sweetie said something to Rarity, but Rarity just kept looking forward, right directly at Apple Bloom standing there.

Finally Sweetie Belle got out of the car on her own, and she had barely closed the door when Rarity pulled the car back, and executed a narrow turn. She didn’t quite peel out of the front yard but, well Apple Bloom sort of felt like Rarity had done so in spirit.

“That went... well,” Sweetie said critically, looking after Rarity’s diminishing auto with a grumpy pout.

“It’s alright Sweetie, she just ain’t ready, ah guess,” Apple Bloom responded sadly.

“Oh,” Sweetie said gesturing with her hands exaggeratedly at the car, “No Sweetie, it’s far too dirty here for the car. It’s the air filter, you see. Oh, I’ll not be a bother Sweetie, I’ll just drop you off so you can go play. Be out front by three o’clock please, Sweetie I don’t want to have to wait long in all this dirt,”

“She ain’t even saying it’s me she’s scared about?” Apple Bloom gaped astonishedly.

“Truthfully,” Sweetie admitted sheepishly, brushing the dust off her purple petticoat, “I think she might not have been kidding about the dirt.”

That was around when Applejack arrived, bringing along Diamond from the orphanage. Applejack got this serious look on her face, when she heard Rarity just drove off like that. “Ah’ll have another talk with her,” Applejack said, “But for now you three go find your friend Scootaloo.”

“We better hurry,” Diamond said urgently, “Before Scootaloo goes and eats all the biscuits!”

The three scampered inside where Scootaloo had done her most valiant effort to eat all the biscuits, but alas none could withstand the power of Granny Smith’s cooking. Scoots waved to them lazily when they ran and trotted in, already relaxing by the fire. Her mother was still off by the table, sipping at a cup of hot tea.

Cheerilee didn’t stay long either, but Scootaloo, Sweetie Belle and Diamond Tiara, Apple Bloom would have for the entire day. Or at least until the afternoon, when Sweetie had to go. Mostly because Rarity was being Rarity about this. Apple Bloom figured she could wheedle another few hours with Sweetie Belle, if she got Rarity and her sister arguing again. Yes, that’s how desperate for company Apple Bloom had become.

Thus it was, that outside the ranch, three girls and a filly were just informally playing around with a ball, but mostly sharing in conversation. “You know, it’s funny,” Scootaloo said critically, kicking the ball against the fence, “We never visited much before, but now we get to come over like every other week. I didn’t even know a farm could be this fun!”

“Well thank goodness for small favors,” Apple Bloom said sarcastically, running over to bump the ball back at Scootaloo, “Ah still miss mah hands.”

“Pff, yeah right,” Diamond countered, “Anything you can do, you can do better without hands. Name one thing you can’t do anymore without hands.”

“Write.”

Diamond winced. “Touché,” she replied at a flat faced Apple Bloom.

“I wonder if you could,” Sweetie Belle mused. “Maybe if you strap something to your h–your arm?”

Apple Bloom waved her entire hoof at Sweetie Belle emphatically, saying, “Remember, this whole big thing is mah hand now. It’s like a... a big fat clumsy finger. And it’s just too big and clumsy. Ah can wrap it around a broom handle maybe, but a pencil? It just don’t work.” She stomped her hoof down, declaring, “These things were made for walking on, an’ you can’t do that without sacrificing a lotta fine motor control.”

“That makes sense, I guess,” Sweetie said in a defeated tone.

“How do you know?” Scootaloo asserted less defeatedly. “What do your hooves even have to do with a motor?”

“Fine motor control,” Apple Bloom emphasized, “It means how much you can make little fine movements. Instead of just motorin’ around.” She demonstrated by trotting in a circle, her tail swishing in a flourish as she stopped and gave Scootaloo her level gaze. “Humans have about ten times as many nerves in one finger than a horse does in their hooves.”

“So, you noticed you’re feeling a lot less sensitive?” Diamond Tiara asked uncertainly.

Apple Bloom shook her head, “No, uh...” she said uncertainly, “But that’s all subjective an’ stuff. Ah only think ah got mah original senses, proprioception an’ all.”

“Pro-prio-what?” Scootaloo asked with a laugh, “What even is that?”

“Oh, ah read about it,” Apple Bloom admitted, too embarassed to really explain just how much time she’d had recently to do nothing but read about stuff. “It means how you feel about your own body. Like uh, look watch ah’ll show ya.”

Apple Bloom backed up from the fence and closed her eyes, then stuck a front hoof out sideways. “Alright,” she declared, “Mah hoof is riiiight...” she trailed off, moving the tip of her tail to rest squarely on it. “Here!” she shouted, once she felt her tail hit her hoof.

Then she pulled her tail back, and put her hoof out at a different angle. “Here!” Apple Bloom repeated, touching it with her tail again. Because of proprioception, she never even had to hesitate.

“I don’t... get it” Sweetie said uncertainly.

“It’s like how you can touch your hands together with your eyes closed,” Apple Bloom explained, “But you can’t touch someone else’s hands, with your eyes closed. So you always know where your own hands are, even though there’s nothing to tell you about it. It’s sometimes called the sixth sense, though it said it ain’t really a sense. But it means ah got different perceptions now, the fact ah can do that with mah tail. If mah hooves had different sensitivity, it wouldn’t feel any different either.”

“That all makes sense,” Diamond said smartly, “But you can tell the difference between your hooves and your tail, so you can tell the difference between your old hands and your new ones.”

“Of course ah cain!” Apple Bloom declared, stomping her hoof frustratedly. “They’re hooves! How could ah not tell the difference? When did ah ever say I couldn’t?”

“A few minutes ago,” Sweetie Belle prompted helpfully. “You said you didn’t feel like you had less feeling in your hooves.”

“Ah... ah guess ah— but—” Apple Bloom’s face scrunched up and she exclaimed in frustration, “Oh, fingle fangle!”

There was a pause.

“Fingle, what?” Scootaloo asked.

“Y’don’t wanna know,” Apple Bloom said, looking down with her bangs shading her eyes. She didn’t have to inform Scootaloo, anyway. Scoots could just ask Diamond Tiara, who clearly knew what it meant from the way she was blushing from head to toe. Apple Bloom made another solemn oath never to repeat anything Granny swore, one she could hopefully keep for more than a month this time.

Bloom managed to distract them from the subject eventually, and soon they were running around like crazy with a spinning disc shooting between them, Apple Bloom scampering around underneath its path. When Apple Bloom jumped in the air and caught it in her mouth, Scootaloo had to stop, laughing uncontrollably. “You look just like a dog!” she crowed.

“Ohyr?” Apple Bloom mumbled, turning her head to the side, “C’nna dg do... ths?!” she snapped her neck around as she shouted, releasing the frisbee to travel in a beeline for Scootaloo who caught it between her hands. She looked at it, and looked at Apple Bloom in surprise, before smiling and throwing it right back to her.

Sweetie Belle was quick to sit out from the game, resting in the shade of a tree rather serenely in her sunflower yellow dress embroidered with hearts and bells. Custom made by her sister, of course, not that that was why Sweetie was sitting out. She simply wasn’t very a athletic person, Scootaloo was utterly tireless, Apple Bloom matched her hoof for foot, and Diamond Tiara was just too stubborn to give in before anyone else did.

So when Sweetie Belle looked up from her book with a small smile, to see how her friends were doing, it was—wait, where did they all go?

“Ah got it! Ah got it!” Apple Bloom shouted out to Diamond, just a bit earlier.

“Me! To me!” Scootaloo counter-shouted, both of them at a great distance from a huffing, grinning Diamond Tiara, who was the one who had the precious frisbee clasped in her hands.

“Between you!” Diamond shouted mischeviously, swinging her arm to eject the disc powerfully into the air, directly between the two of them. She was too excited though, and way miscalculated the distance. “Ah got it! Ah got—!” Apple Bloom’s increasingly distant chant cut off, as the frisbee cleared the tops of the dense trees that marked the far edge of Sweet Apple Acres. She and Scootaloo both jerked to a halt, as the frisbee descended into the foliage with a spray of leaves.

Diamond jogged up guiltily as the two looked into the forest, saying, “Sorry, I... I just got, like... too... can you see it?” She was having a harder time talking while breathing hard. Scootaloo wasn’t nearly as exerted, and Apple Bloom looked practically untouched for all she’d been moving more than both of them combined.

“Yeah, I...” Apple Bloom’s muzzle scrunched up a bit as she said, “I think ah see it. Let’s go,” Before she could run into the forest though, Scootaloo said,

“Wait. A-are we supposed to go in there?”

Both Apple Bloom and Diamond Tiara gave Scootaloo an odd look. “Since when did you care about like, doing what you’re told?” Diamond asked Scootaloo.

“Hey, I care!” Scootaloo retorted hotly, “It’s just... it’s usually stupid things they tell you, not actually dangerous things.”

“What’s so dangerous about the forest?” Apple Bloom asked Scootaloo. “Not like there’s any wolves in there! Trust me, ah checked!”

“Yeah, but what if,” Scootaloo bit her lip, shifting on her sneakers, “What if we find that apple or something?”

Diamond Tiara turned at that. “You don’t think we could get turned into ponies too?” she more stated than asked. “That would be like, so ironic!” she added enthusiastically.

“You want to get turned into a pony?” Scootaloo asked her in disbelief.

Diamond shook her head, holding up her hands defensively. “No, no, I didn’t say that! I don’t want to be a pony. I mean, it would be like, totally terrible! No offense, Apple Bloom,” she remarked down to the grumpy little pony standing beside her.

“None takin,” Apple Bloom grumbled neutrally. “But y’know, me an’ mah brother tore apart these woods looking for that grove. Sure as ah’m standing on four hooves, it obviously ain’t just a dream, but if you’re not dreamin’ ah don’t think there’s one possible inch of land that could have that apple thing.”

“Yeah,” Scootaloo said in a quarrelous voice, “But maybe it’s because it has to be you and me, and Sweetie.” Diamond Tiara huffed a bit at that, and crossed her arms, but her frown softened when Scootaloo added in an edge of fear, “It might be after us next!”

“W-well, Sweetie ain’t here,” Apple Bloom asserted, waving over at the tree that was somewhere over there down the hill a bit. “So it ain’t gonna be any different. What are you scared of? Come on!”

Apple Bloom charged into the woods without another word, the little pony slipping under a bush and over a log, just like she’d already extensively explored the place or something.

“I just—” Scootaloo stomped a foot in frustration as Apple Bloom left her behind, “Oh fine, hold on!” and she too ran into the forest, making her way a bit more carefully as she had to navigate the unfamiliar and crowded forest floor.

Diamond Tiara actually hesitated a few more seconds, before shouting, “Hey wait for me!” and stepping into the forest before she lost sight of Scootaloo.

It was easy for Diamond to keep sight of the brightly dressed, brightly colored girl though, and soon she and Scootaloo were together with Apple Bloom, hunting around underneath the dim light of the sun filtering through the dense foliage above.

“Do you see it?” Scootaloo said, looking left and right, both in search and nervous as all getout.

“Ah didn’t see uh... it...” Apple Bloom blushed, her little tomato tail swishing like an irritated cat as she explained, “It’s mah big old ears again. I heard it land like right around here somewhere.”

“Haha, you’re like a bat,” Scootaloo snickered.

“Go ahead an’ laugh it up,” Apple Bloom responded, rolling her eyes.

“Just get looking, lovebirds,” Diamond Tiara jibed at them, starting to root around through the bushes herself for a particular molded plastic red disc. Scootaloo looked above, moving from tree to massive tree, shoving her whole weight against them to try and make their leaves shake. Apple Bloom was better at rooting around than Diamond Tiara, but it was actually Scootaloo who had the right idea, and the frisbee came plummetting down out of a tree’s branches to hit the bushes with a crunch of leaves.

“Scootaloo, you found it!” Apple Bloom crowed cheerfully. Diamond reached down and picked it up, unsurprised to find that the sturdy simple toy hadn’t even been scratched from the experience. Not that it was free of scratches. They’d been using it a lot lately, when they had a whole farm to run around instead of the cramped lots in the crowded city.

They were all surrounding the frisbee, when they turned at once to the sound of alarmed cries from none other than Sweetie Belle.

“Apple Bloom?! Scootaloo? Where are you?? Diamond Tiara! Apple Bloom?!”

What worried them was that Sweetie Belle’s cries were coming from much deeper in the forest, and not back at the ranch at all!

“Sweetie?!” Apple Bloom shouted, running towards her voice. “Why are you back there?? Hello?”

“Apple Bloom is that you?!” came Sweetie’s faint voice. They couldn’t make themselves heard, so the three of them hurried further into the forest, until they were close enough that Sweetie could hear them more clearly.

“Just follow my voice!” Scootaloo shouted.

“No, you follow my voice!” Sweetie’s voice shouted back.

“We don’t want to go deeper into the forest!” Diamond Tiara shouted.

“Then follow me!” Sweetie shouted back.

“Why should we follow you deeper into the forest?” Apple Bloom called out, a little less loudly since she was the one farthest ahead.

There was a pause at that. Then Sweetie’s voice rang out again, shouting,

“I’m not in the forest!”

Bit by bit, they made their way to Sweetie, and absolutely everyone besides Sweetie was completely shocked to find Sweetie Belle waiting on the edge of the forest, at Apple Bloom’s very own Sweet Apple Acres.

“Consarnit, we got turned around again!” Apple Bloom exclaimed in frustration, shaking the twigs and leaves off of her furry coat, and overalls. Her mane and tail remained something of a mess though.

“No we didn’t,” Diamond Tiara protested. “We went deeper into the forest! How are we outside the forest again?”

“It’s real easy to get turned around in those woods,” Apple Bloom explained to her. “Seems like no matter how deep you get, you always end up back at the ranch. It’s like, some sorta geography thing ah think.”

Diamond Tiara frowned at that, but didn’t protest.

“You all just ran into the forest without even telling me!” Sweetie Belle said in impotent outrage. “I was so worried!”

Scootaloo held up the frisbee, saying, “We were just going to get this. What did you think, that we were going to disappear if we went in there?”

“You might have run into the apple!” Sweetie protested, pointing at Scootaloo so insistently to be poking her in the chest.

Scootaloo flinched at her words, saying, “Oh, well uh, it’s like... a dream thing, so you can’t really find it right?”

“Well if you turn into ponies too,” Sweetie Belle said with the fury of a thousand puppies and kittens, “Then don’t say I didn’t tell you so!”

“We’ll be careful, Sweetie,” Scootaloo said, with a roll of her eyes. Diamond didn’t add anything in support of Scootaloo though, and just took the frisbee, running off back into the grassy lawn, on which the main farm house was built.

They were all laying together later, with even Apple Bloom sprawled out on her belly, in a position that looked terribly uncomfortable but she insisted was fine, when Scootaloo said cheerfully, “That was some adventure, huh?”

“Huh?” Apple Bloom said, lifting her head curiously.

“We got lost in the forest,” Scootaloo said, “And Sweetie Belle led us back to safety with her voice!”

Diamond Tiara gave a disapproving pfff. “That wasn’t an adventure,” she said derisively. “We just ran off for a few minutes, and we didn’t disappear mysteriously, never to be seen again.”

“You want to never be seen again?” Scootaloo asked her incredulously.

Diamond groaned, “Ugh, no. I didn’t say that. It just wasn’t anything special.”

“What would be special,” Sweetie Belle asked, “To you?”

“I dunno,” Diamond Tiara said, leaning back and looking up at the leaves above beyond her hands. “Like, exploring some strange old ruin, or falling into a portal to a new land, or like, discovering something that changes everything. You know, stuff that never happens for real.”

“Teen Girl Squad and the Case of the Missing Frisbee,” Diamond declared demonstratively.

Scootaloo winced at that. “Yeah I see what you mean,” she said. “It does sound kind of lame.”

“Hey!” Apple Bloom piped up in a somewhat hurt voice, “Ah discovered something that changes everything, what about that?”

“Everything for you yeah,” Diamond Tiara said glowering, “But nothing for me. It’s just the same old thing, every day. Nothing ever changes...”

“What do ya mean?” Apple Bloom responded, leaning up on a elbowish thing to look at Diamond disapprovingly. “You went an’ walked all th’ way to the ranch! How is that not changing anything?”

“Yeah and then I went back.” Diamond sat up, seeming surprised at the venom in her own voice. “It didn’t change anything,” she continued more evenly, “It just went right back to how it was before. Not like you, Apple Bloom.”

“So what,” Scootaloo asked again, sitting up herself too and eyeballing Diamond Tiara. “You don’t want to be a pony, so what?”

Diamond looked like she was going to deny it again, but she firmed her lip and stated, “And what if I do?

“You do not want to be a pony, trust me,” Apple Bloom said definitively.

“What’s so bad about it?” Diamond asked snippily, hands on her hips.

“Hands, for one,” Apple Bloom said, waving a hoof in her face. “You have no idea how much ah miss havin’ five things to grab with insteada just one.”

“You seem to be doing alright though,” Diamond protested, “You can catch a frisbee just as easy as any one of us.”

“But ah cain’t talk with a big ol’ frisbee in mah mouth,” Apple Bloom retorted.

“Say, that reminds me,” Scootaloo poked in, “How did you keep the frisbee from getting all slobbery? You had it in your mouth and I thought it would be, but it wasn’t.”

Apple Bloom blinked and offered unsurely, “Ah dunno, ah was just using mah lips an’ teeth an’ ah guess ah’m just... not very slobbery?”

Scootaloo leaned forward curiously, “W—”

“We’re not gonna stick our fingers in Apple Bloom’s mouth,” Diamond cut in, giving Scootaloo a look. Scootaloo looked mad, as if she was caught with her hand in the cookie jar. But she folded her arms, said “Fine,” and backed off.

“You’re like, the chosen one of a princess or something,” Diamond Tiara gushed to Apple Bloom with a bit of girlish excitement. “She visits you in your dreams. And now you get to go on an adventure to save her, just like a story book!”

“Ah never wanted this to happen!” Apple Bloom protested. “Ah never asked for any of this!”

“I know you didn’t,” Diamond Tiara said with a half smile. “I’m just saying, it isn’t all that terrible, being all like, pony now.”

After a sullen silence, Apple Bloom replied snidely, “Ah’m not sure she even actually chose me. An’ ah don’t know where she is, so how am ah going to go on this adventure? You think your life doesn’t have any adventure, but what about the Fall Formal? That’s this week, and you know something crazy is gonna happen. Ah bet you are just as ‘chosen’ as I am, and it’ll all be revealed that night.”

Apple Bloom stood up then, saying with hurt in her voice, “And you know who won’t be able to be there? Me! Ah’ll just be stuck here on this stupid farm just like ah have been all these months, an’ maybe even for the rest of my life! How is that an—” she would have said “an adventure” but Apple Bloom just started choking up right there in the middle of her sentence.

“N-never mind,” Apple Bloom whimpered, sniffling and wiping the tears from her eyes. “Ah hate this so much,” she said sorrowfully.

“Apple Bloom,” Scootaloo said sympathetically, “I—”

“No,” Diamond Tiara declared. Both Scootaloo and Apple Bloom turned to look at her, while Sweetie remained laying on her back looking thoughtfully upward. “You think you have it so bad?” Diamond said angrily to Apple Bloom, “You have a brother and a sister and a grandmother, who could have just left you here, but instead they helped you! I’m stuck in a stupid building all day, and then another stupid building all night. You can go anywhere you want, and I have to be ‘inside at all times after curfew’. You think that’s freedom?”

“Ah don’t want freedom!” Apple Bloom cried in tearful frustration, “Ah just want something to do!”

Diamond Tiara’s words halted in her throat, as it really did seem like Apple Bloom was going to lose it and start crying. Diamond said more carefully, in a more controlled voice, “The only thing you’re missing is the Fall Formal, right? Well, let’s sneak you into the Fall Formal then!”

Apple Bloom blinked, the craziness of the idea driving the sorrow right out of her head. “No,” she stated simply.

“Come on,” Diamond Tiara whined, “It’s a good idea—”

“No,” repeated Apple Bloom more emphatically. “If ah go to the formal everyone will just see this stupid little pony walking aroun’. Ah don’t want people to see me like this!”

Sweetie Belle had sat up in the meantime, looking at Apple Bloom owlishly.

“Well we saw you like this, and it wasn’t so bad,” Scootaloo ventured cautiously.

“Yeah, but you put up with it, cause you’re mah friends!” Apple Bloom stated, scraping a hoof, then startling and looking at it guiltily before setting it down carefully. “Ah don’t mean to be just some dumb animal,” she said apologetically, “But ah cain’t thank you enough for bein’ able to tolerate it.”

“It’s not as bad as you think, Apple Bloom,” Diamond Tiara said unflinchingly. “You really think I’d be able to sleep in your bed, if you were that intolerable?”

Scootaloo gaped, saying, “When did this happen?”

“When I was...” Diamond blushed, turning away from Scootaloo back to Apple Bloom. “Never mind. My point is that you are only a little dirtier than you used to be, but that’s just because you totally let yourself go, and there’s nothing dumb, or animal like about you.”

“Ah smell like a horse,” Apple Bloom whimpered quietly.

“No you–” Diamond pursed her lips. “Well, I mean, maybe a little but I mean like, horses don’t actually smell that bad, Apple Bloom.”

“You ever even been near a horse’s backside before?” Apple Bloom countered with a skeptical eyebrow.

“That’s it!” Sweetie Belle exclaimed. “That’s why you don’t smell like an animal. You wipe when you poop!”

Everybody looked at her and Sweetie blushed horribly, saying, “Oh, um, I didn’t mean I mean...”

“No, you have a point there,” Scootaloo remarked. “Isn’t that the difference between animals and people really? It all comes down to wiping.”

Diamond Tiara paused, and asked Apple Bloom, “You do, right?”

“Of course ah do!” Apple Bloom shouted exasperatedly. Then she blushed too, in the strange manner that a pony’s flush managed to show beneath their fur and crouched lower looking all flustered and stuff.

“How do you um... do it?” Scootaloo asked halfway between curious and not wanting to know the answer.

“Ah just use my hoof,” Apple Bloom mumbled. “It’s not hard...”

“But, see?” Diamond exclaimed triumphantly. “You don’t even need hands anymore, because you can still do things without them!”

“And you are still just as fun to be around as you always have been,” Sweetie Belle put in. “It’s just you’re a cute little pony now, and I’m not just saying it to humor you. It actually looks really good on you.”

Apple Bloom tilted her head. “Wait, what looks good on me?”

“Pony!” Sweetie Belle answered with a smile.

“It... it’s not a suit!” Apple Bloom protested aghast.

“No, it’s better than a suit!” Sweetie responded lithely.

“You should just admit it, Apple Bloom,” Diamond Tiara said in only a half joking manner. “When you talk about yourself as if you have it bad, then you make people who have it even worse feel... like... awful.”

Apple Bloom waited for her to continue, but Diamond seemed lost in her thoughts all of a sudden, staring forward over the knees she was hunched over.

“I’ve been growing my hair longer,” Sweetie said abruptly. She waited until everyone had turned to look at her before explaining, “It’s because I’m getting older. My hair was cute when it was shorter, but now I have to make it beautiful. Just like Rarity. That’s why I would want to be a pony.”

“Uh, wait why was that, again...?” Apple Bloom asked feeling a little lost by Sweetie’s train of thought. Sweetie Belle sat up and looked at the pony girl. And then lunged for her, and dragged Apple Bloom up into her arms, hugging the struggling pony fiercely with a beaming smile and exclaiming,

“Because you’re so cute!”

Scootaloo still seemed puzzled, but Diamond gave Sweetie a wan if knowing look, and asked, “You want to be a pony just so you can be cute?”

Sweetie Belle relaxed the hug, and Apple Bloom looked behind herself with concern, over her shoulder up at the pensive girl.

“Octave asked me out,” Sweetie hurriedly announced.

“Who??” Scootaloo blurted out, beside herself with... something.

“Octave Melody,” Sweetie continued uneasily, “He’s the lead cellist in the Canterlot orchestra. You know, the p-prodigy?” She clenched her fists anxiously, saying, “He said he loves my singing and enjoys my company and he wants to know if I would accompany him to the Fall Formal.”

“Wow, Sweetie!” Scootaloo exclaimed in— “That’s great!!” yeah, in clueless excitement.

“Sc–” Diamond Tiara managed to berate a single syllable before Scootaloo announced,

“Oh hey I forgot to tell you, Apple Bloom!” Scootaloo gave a smug self-satisfied grin at the pony girl haplessly ensnared in Sweetie’s arms, saying, “Guess who asked me to the Fall Formal.”

Apple Bloom just looked at Scootaloo like a deer caught in headlights.

“This cute boy in Technology 101 named Dinky,” Scootaloo answered herself closing her eyes and smiling all genteel. “I think we’re really gonna hit it off!”

“Just like you’ve been saying every day in school for the past week,” Diamond grumbled under her breath. Apple Bloom heard her, but didn’t chew her out, since it was too quiet for Scootaloo to hear. Instead Apple Bloom said to Scootaloo,

“Ah’m happy for you, Scootaloo! But... don’t you want to hear about Sweetie Belle, a bit?”

Sweetie Belle was the one to speak, not Scootaloo, saying “I don’t know how you do it, Scootaloo,” in a mournful tone. “I didn’t...” She bit her lip. “I mean, I got nervous and I– I said I had to think and I didn’t know what to think and—”

“You turned him down?” Diamond gaped at Sweetie. “Even I know about Octave! He’s a rising star!”

“I didn’t turn him down,” Sweetie huffed, “I just... he told me how beautiful I was, and I felt like I would hurt him if I said no, so I just said I needed time to think.”

She paused, then added, “This never would have been a problem if I had taken the Golden Apple instead.”

Nobody really knew what to say at first, but Apple Bloom slipped out of Sweetie’s arms, and faced her seriously. Putting a forehoof on her knee. Apple Bloom said, “Sweetie, y’ really think that bein’ like this would be any better? Maybe you wouldn’t be hurting some fancy boy’s feelings, but if you noticed, Rarity hasn’t exactly taken kindly to what happened to me. Imagine how she’d feel, if something happened to you!”

Sweetie started to answer, then she paused. Her expression darkened, then lightened again with mixed feelings. A giggle escaped her then, and she suggested, “She’d probably be beating your door down, Apple Bloom, demanding to know what you’ve done to me.”

Sweetie Belle stood up with a hand to her chest, exclaiming in a dramatic accent, “Oh, who dares turn my dearest sister into a pony? I will surely destroy them, the vile curs!”

Apple Bloom tried not to laugh, really she did, but when Diamond gave a critical hmmm and said, “That’s pretty accurate, but it needs more screaming and wailing,” it was just impossible not to. It was wrong of them to find amusement in Rarity’s self inflicted misery, but she was just being so silly about all this!

Apple Bloom wondered how many other students would react like Rarity. Too many, that’s for sure. No, one thing was absolutely certain is Apple Bloom was not going to go to the Fall Formal, no how and no way.

Later at the Fall Formal, Apple Bloom exclaimed in a tight reedy whisper from underneath the tablecloth torn from the remains of the refreshment table, “Ah cain’t believe y’all talked me into this!”

Next to her, totally covered in soot, Diamond Tiara exclaimed as well, “I can’t believe that just happened!”

“This enough adventure for you, Diamond?” Scootaloo said to her irascibly.

“Uggh,” Diamond exclaimed, dropping her assault rifle and folding her arms sourly. She didn’t deny it though.

“Do you think the fire is still spreading?” Sweetie Belle whimpered alongside the two of them, curiously untouched.

Scootaloo, who was also peeking out from under the tablecloth, not a very inconspicuous lump said, “After all those fire extinguishers exploded? Everything is absolutely soaked in nasty foam!”

A blonde boy next to Scootaloo just shook his head and said, “I’m so confused.”

“Maybe ah’m just a dumb pony,” Apple Bloom mused, “But ah’m pretty sure challenging someone to a duel because you lost to them is against the rules or somethin’.”

“At least both the princesses are unconscious,” Tiara sighed, “I didn’t even see who won.”

“Ah can hear the sirens already,” Apple Bloom said. “Maybe we better skedaddle before the paramedics get here, an’ who knows who else.”

And so the four, now five friends skedaddled like they never skedaddled before, the lead being Apple Bloom, eager to get her little pony body out of sight before it made things even worse.

The two girls left up on stage lay there serenely silent as the sprinkler alarms continued to rain down from above, the ruined gymnasium around them bedecked with unfittingly gay streamers of the brightest pink. Everyone who hadn’t fled remained standing around the two in solemn reflection, until the paramedics pushed their way through the crowd. Somehow, the partygoers all knew in their hearts that it would be quite a while before anyone was willing to allow another contest for anyone to become the princess of the Fall Formal.

“Best Fall Formal Ever,” Princess Trixie Lulamoon would say later, after she awoke in the hospital.

Author's Note

Actually, they can...

Apple Bloom Attends The Fall Formal

Apple Bloom somehow against all reason and sense, found herself, herself at her very first school dance. She was at Canterlot High for the first time in more weeks than she wanted to remember, walking along all quiet-like under the generous bustle of Diamond Tiara’s elaborately crafted gown. Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo were there too, at least at first.

But then a boy named Octave came and broke up their shaky little circle of friendship. “Sweetie, you came!” the dark grey boy said in a cheerful voice heading towards a baritone, bowing graciously before her and, not noticing everyone else with her, it seemed.

“H-hi Octave,” Sweetie said with a nervous wave. “These are my friends,” she said uncertainly. “Diamond Tiara, Ap—Scootaloo, and Scootaloo.”

“Charmed, I’m sure,” he said politely, still not looking at anyone else. Taking Sweetie’s hand, he led her to the steps to the auditorium saying, “Come, let us enter the formal, together! Our first formal, and to do it with such a beautiful girl as you. I can truly say this is going to be a magical night!”

Sweetie didn’t have the heart to curb his very well mannered, but overeager enthusiasm, and let herself be dragged inside, trying not to catch her dress on the way in, with but a little pleading look to the others before vanishing through the doors to face the ticket masters.

Apple Bloom peeked out from under Diamond’s dress, saying, “Reckon we should help her out.”

“Shoosh!” Diamond said, pushing her dress down over Apple Bloom. “You’ve gotta stay hidden like until we get inside!”

“Ah still think this is a terrible idea,” came Apple Bloom’s muffled voice from underneath the bustle.

“You think what’s a terrible idea?” another boy asked Diamond, who stiffened and said,

“Me? I was just like, the hem on my dress, just it’s like a little bulky you know how it goes ha ha ha ha ha!”

Apple Bloom couldn’t see a blooming thing outside this dress thingamajig. What’s worse is, it had the curiously acrid yet marshmallowy smell of Diamond Tiara herself. Apple Bloom never felt glad to smell like a horse more than this evening right here under this smelly thing. At least the beautiful girl wearing this gown was meticulously cleanly, and hadn’t had beans for dinner or anything.

Stuck under Diamond Tiara’s butt extension, Apple Bloom just had to peek her nose out again at the sound of someone being dragged around, and the sound of Scootaloo’s subsequent exclamation,

“Come on Diamond, don’t be teasing my date now!”

What Apple Bloom saw were some shiny black dress shoes, some boy dolled up all formally, and she barely caught a glimpse of wavy blonde hair before losing her nerve and ducking back underneath. This was a terrible idea. That was Dinky, huh? This was the worst idea. Scootaloo sure had her arm hooked in his at least, so it must be him.

After an awkward pause, Scootaloo’s voice said in a dissatisfied slump, “I guess we should go then.”

“Yeah like.. don’t mind us– me. Don’t mind me, Scootaloo,” Diamond said smoothly. “You two like, enjoy your uh, like, stuff.”

“Are you waiting for anyone?” came the boy’s light tenor, calm yet with a searching edge to it. It made Diamond stiffen right up against Apple Bloom, so Bloom figured he must have been addressing Diamond directly.

After a pause, Diamond Tiara said, “Yes!” in a challenging tone. “I mean, no,” in a less challenging tone, and then “Like, none of your business!” in a challenging tone again. Apple Bloom resisted the urge to face... put her hoof against her face, whatever you call that now.

“Look,” Scootaloo said, “I don’t want to make this awkward or anything...” That made Apple Bloom’s ears flatten even more. Couldn’t Scootaloo tell Diamond Tiara was lonely as all getout and she needed someone to reassure her that she was still the awesome girl she always was? Yeah, Scootaloo probably couldn’t tell. She was sort of clueless about stuff like that.

Then Dinky spoke up again, saying lightly, “You uh, want to come with us?”

“Why should I?” Diamond said with as much restraint as she ever did. “You didn’t ask like, me to the Fall Formal!”

Dinky stuttered at that, saying, “W-well I didn’t I mean I couldn’t ask everyone I mean Scootaloo and I are uh, we know each other and—”

“It’s fine,” Diamond said resignedly, turning her dress in a way Apple Bloom had to scramble around.

“You really couldn’t get a date?” Dinky asked incredulously. Apple Bloom couldn’t even imagine how awkward this was making Scootaloo feel. That girl really knew how to pick her dates.

“Why’s that so surprising?” Diamond responded haughtily, which was odd since it was a self deprecatory statement.

“Well I’d think it would be easy,” Dinky said in a somewhat irritated tone. “Lots of boys would want to go out with someone as beautiful as uh—” Dinky cut off like the head of a sad crab. Oh wow, Casanova, Apple Bloom wanted to shout sarcastically.

“Oh wow, Casanova,” Scootaloo drawled sarcastically. Apple Bloom could practically feel Dinky’s blush from ten feet away. “Telling other girls they’re beautiful when your date’s right here,” she teased with a touch of insecurity in her voice. Apple Bloom really hoped this wasn’t going to end in Diamond and Scootaloo brawling, because there was no way she was going to be able to hide under Tiara’s dress in that case. And also as a side note, they might hurt each other again.

“You’re beautiful too, Scootaloo,” Dinky said solemnly. Apple Bloom would have buried her head in her hooves, if she wasn’t so busy manuvering to stay underneath this bustle. Now he really stepped in it! That was not what you said to Scootaloo. You called her cool, or awesome, or even rough and tough, but not beautiful! That was Sweetie Belle’s thing! Sweetie was the one who got all blushy at being called beautiful, but Scootaloo hated stuff like that. Scootaloo didn’t even answer at first, and when she did, both her and Dinky spoke at once, Dinky saying,

“When I said it before, I meant—”

and Scootaloo cutting over him with,

“No, I’m not.”

Diamond broke the uneasy stalement brutally, saying in a teasing if sincere sneer, “Come on, lovebirds, let’s go dance!” Then, Tiara’s dress really began to move, and Apple Bloom had to scramble along, missing their conversation due to focusing all her attention on her footing. She winced every time her stiff hoof struck concrete, trying to put as much of the impact on the rough, thick pads at the bottom of her hooves as possible. Then they were going up stairs! This was a terrible idea. Apple Bloom managed it, somehow.

“Ready to dance the night away?” Scootaloo said excitedly. She didn’t have to inflate her excitement either, neither to cover for Apple Bloom, nor for why they were really here. If there’s anything Scootaloo loved, it was dancing.

“I’m ready to try!” Dinky said brightly. He really seemed a cheerful sort, when he wasn’t stuffing his foot in his mouth. Apple Bloom would’ve liked him, if she could have come out from underneath this dress to actually meet him. Yeah that would go over well. Hi there, Scootaloo’s date. I’m a talking pony space alien. Want to shake my hoof like it was a hand?

“Tickets,” a neutral, older male voice came. It was mostly a formality, the ticket proceedings, but pretty much only students and faculty were supposed to be in the dance, so that kept some strange hobo or worse some student’s overprotective parents from coming in and making a scene. It was one of those real grown up things, where you were trusted to act on your own and behave responsibly. Something Apple Bloom would have appreciated if she wasn’t....

Well, it was starting to sound like a broken record at this point. Apple Bloom was tiny. Apple Bloom was a pony. Apple Bloom just didn’t feel safe anymore without someone to check with or keep tabs on her. She just felt too... all... woobly and stuff.

She had figured it must’ve just been her getting all paranoid over her family’s speculation about dogs out in the woods, why she felt so funny away from them. But right now, quivering under a teenager’s dress, in what was probably the worst plan ever conceived since the noodle incident, Apple Bloom wasn’t so sure about that. Right now, Apple Bloom just wanted to run into Applejack’s arms and whimper into her chest and maybe even cry a little until she felt safe again. It wasn’t the sort of silly sissy way she’d felt for a long time, not since she was...

Not since she was real little.

“That was easy!” Scootaloo said as the ~~four~~three of them shuffled along at the pace Diamond had to go to manage her ridiculous dress.

“Well we’re in now,” Diamond responded conspiratorially, “And now we can—” she cut off, then said in an exaggerated declaration, “Dance. We can like, dance, and have refreshments and things!”

Someone was going to lift Diamond’s dress and see a pony all buried in its folds. That’s just what was going to happen. Apple Bloom’s ears were down and her tail was low, because she just wanted to get out of sight before anything bad happened. And maybe a little cuddling, and soft rocking. Then Dinky said,

“Diamond Tiara, your dress has a... um...” Apple Bloom was sure the jig was up. She looked around frantically and she seemed like she was totally covered except for her—!

Apple Bloom jerked her tail back under Diamond’s dress.

“Oh, I guess it’s... fixed,” Dinky said in a puzzled tone. But despite Apple Bloom’s fears that he would flip up Diamond’s dress and expose her, nothing happened. She just kept shuffling along, trying to quiet her hoofsteps and any whimpers that threatened to escape her tight chest.

“Just like a... loose ribbon,” Diamond explained, “That I pulled like, tight yeah.”

Apple Bloom felt herself cantered sideways in a semicircle, thanking herself for doing so much running around at the farm, because she would have tripped a thousand times by now if she had just transformed today. Then, the frame of the dress smacked against something solid, and Apple Bloom’s heart skipped. Were they there?

“Boy these refreshments sure look good,” Diamond Tiara announced loudly. That was the cue. Hunching down, Apple Bloom peered under the dress only to see a dim, indirect, filtered light. Perfect. She scootched forward, and thanked her lucky stars she was a pony, who didn’t have to stand up to move forward easily. Apple Bloom snuck out from underneath Diamond Tiara’s bustle...

...to right underneath a refreshment table. Sweetie had made sure her sister made sure her friend made sure to get a nice long tablecloth or two on the thing while decorating, making it a big long rectangular corridor under which Apple Bloom was unseen and completely alone. Yep, Apple Bloom had to conclude that hiding under a refreshment table was definitely one of her better ideas.

Apple Bloom swiveled her head around to look behind her and lifted her tail out of the way of the edge of the tablecloth, just in time to see under it. Diamond’s bustle was moving away from the edge of the refreshment table. That bustle would be Apple Bloom’s ticket in and out of here. No other way for her to leave. She sure as hell wasn’t gonna go run out on the dance floor and try to cut a rug, much less leave this dance walking out in the open all exposed.

But she just had to be here for the big event. This was where Diamond Tiara’s dream was gonna be. With the demon attacking and the rainbow zappy thing. Apple Bloom figured since she was already a pony, she was halfway to being one of the demon defeaters, yay! If nothing else, she absolutely, certainly, totally had to see the look on her sister’s face, when Applejack did turn into a horse woman before beating that evil thing.

And Apple Bloom kind of really, truly wanted to see her sister be a big hero like that.

So there she was under the refreshment table. The smell of cheese and crackers wafted through her snout, and more prominently lettuce and carrots, and crisp cucumbers and celery, and parsley, and those white flowers with the yellow cups in them which probably was just a centerpiece. Apple Bloom kind of regretted not eating before she left. Diamond didn’t check on her before walking off (too risky) so Apple Bloom couldn’t ask for anything. The plan for Apple Bloom was just to wait under here, until shit started going down. Then she could help, or just watch, or something.

Yep this was pretty much the worst plan ever.

Apple Bloom hunkered down, her hooves folding easily under her to press her smooth belly to the cool gymnasium floor. That really did make her blush, because she remembered she didn’t have Diamond’s dress protecting her anymore. She was all naked under this table. All those naked hours on the farm didn’t stop her from feeling fiercely self conscious about not having any clothing on, here at this very important formal dance, with all these people and boys around to see her buck naked. Apple Bloom had heard of those wild parties where you find a girl naked under a table, but this was ridiculous!

She was okay though. Apple Bloom was nice and hidden. They picked the furthest off table with the least fun eatables on it to hide under, and nobody would find her. One side of this table was flush against the wall, and a second side flush against the corner. No way for anybody to sneak up on her.

Yet for a second, just one second, Apple Bloom did spare a guilty blush at the thought of just running out there and cutting a rug out in the middle of the dance floor, without a single scrap of clothing on her behind. And she covered her face embarassedly at the thought of Diamond Tiara doing that too, just to show her up.

The minutes ticked by, and one could only fantasize about one’s wild friend dancing in the nude so long without... doing something about it. And Apple Bloom did not even slightly entertain the possibility of doing that. Not here, not nowhere, not never! She wasn’t into animals, and therefore she wasn’t into herself. Besides, she didn’t even have fingers anymore, so how would she even do it? Squirming a bit and swishing her tail aside, Apple Bloom just ignored any thoughts like that, distracting herself with the food smells and the sounds of partygoers around the tables and on the dance floor.

Those thoughts were actually pretty easy to ignore. Her attention instead drifted to curiosity again, and Apple Bloom stood up, almost able to stand up straight under this table, hunching her head forward just a titch to sneak along to the edge of a tablecloth. There was a tiny crack that she could see through, between where the tablecloths met.

She couldn’t make out much, mostly just moving bodies gesticulating back and forth, but it was a view of the dance floor, and she did occasionally catch glimpses of Scootaloo going nuts, and even saw Diamond Tiara, who had ditched the hoop skirt in the locker room in order to rejoin the ball in her athletic yellow dance pants and fancy boots and that black jacket of hers with the white liner. Diamond had said something to Apple Bloom about how yellow was the new black or something fashionisty like that, but Apple Bloom kind of wondered if Diamond was trying to match Apple Bloom’s colors for some reason. Not that you needed a reason to admire a smoking hot yellow furry flank like this!

Yeah Apple Bloom didn’t know who she was kidding.

She didn’t know how many hours the dance was, but soon her stomach was rumbling something fierce. Apple Bloom could almost taste those celery sticks. She wondered if they had peanut butter on them. She really hoped they had peanut butter on them. No wait, no she didn’t, because she was stuck under the table and couldn’t get any! If they had peanut butter, that made it even worse! They smelled like it. She really wanted some peanut butter.

Apple Bloom’s guardian angel flew in, the sound of Scootaloo coming up to rest with a thump on the refreshment table, dragging along behind, her (much out of breath) date. She and Dinky were laughing and talking, about some fancy electronic thing called a dance pad. An arcade game, maybe? Anyway whatever it was, Apple Bloom snaked a hoof out and tugged on Scootaloo’s sock urgently. Scootaloo kind of paused then, and physically pushed Dinky a few feet across the floor, then dropped down on her knees saying quickly,

“Dropped a contact lens.”

Scootaloo lifted the tablecloth just enough for Apple Bloom to look out at her urgently and whisper, “Scoots ah’m dying here! Cain you get me one of them celery sticks maybe?”

Scootaloo nodded silently, and flexed her legs to stand, right at the moment that a purple boy with short blonde hair, dressed in a dissheveled but conservative suit and tie bumped into Scootaloo, searching the ground with his dextrous slim fingers for a ...

Well gosh did he have some pretty eyes.

Scootaloo released the edge of the tablecloth, letting it fall gently down.

“Was that a—” Dinky managed to say before Scootaloo whispered desperately,

“No, don’t look!” scrabbling at his hand, no doubt reaching again for the tablecloth that was the only thing keeping Apple Bloom hidden.

“Is there an animal under there?” he whispered back to Scootaloo. The only reason Apple Bloom’s ears weren’t going flat down was she felt paralyzed with fear. Her ears perked straight like she had to hear every single little thing to get some hint of how to get out of this without a disaster.

The two of them stood up with Scootaloo clumsily whispering, “No it, yes it’s, it’s not what you... it’s nothing!”

“Scootaloo, there is an animal in the gymnasium,” Dinky whispered back, and every time he used that word it cut right through Apple Bloom’s heart. Why did she even come here? She should be on the farm. The stupid boring same old everyday safe farm with her warm bed and her teddy b— she refused to finish that thought. She had to do something! This Dinky fellow was going to ruin her! The table flying away from her like it was in a tornado, and all the students standing in a circle around her, spotlights pouring on her at all sides, all them glowy eyed kids in the shadows, whispering to each other and pointing and jeering and—

“I’m going to get the principal,” Dinky said quickly, his feet stepping away from the table.

“No wait!” Scootaloo exclaimed, grabbing his arm. “You can’t!”

“Is this a prank?” Dinky said angrily, “You could get people hurt! Why do you have an animal tied under there? Is that a dog? What if she gets spooked and bites someone? This is cruelty to animals!”

“No it’s not!” Scootaloo said back, equally angry for different reasons, enough that she was starting to raise her voice most disconcertingly. Apple Bloom’s whole future now depended on Scootaloo’s sense of tact and restraint. She couldn’t imagine herself being any more doomed.

“Then what’s going on?!” Dinky retorted. Apple Bloom panicked.

She desperately stuck her head out from under the tablecloth, looking around frenetically. Nobody by this refreshment table but the tense figures facing each other off, of Scootaloo and that Dinky fellow.

“Ah’m a magical animal!” Apple Bloom called out, up at Dinky from under the table. Apple Bloom put on her most convincing smile, and looked up at the golden eyed boy, who had turned to stare at her with the widest eyes. Apple Bloom tried to explain, “Ah’m here on a... mission to uh... it’s top secret.” She thought she could stand the look he gave her, but she was wrong. Because it wasn’t a look of fear, or wonderment exactly, or bewilderment... exactly.

“...Apple Bloom?” Dinky asked in too small a voice for his lanky frame, with a look of recognition. Apple Bloom yanked her head under the table. She was hyperventilating under there. She curled up in a ball. She had to calm down. Everything was fine. How did he recognize her?!

“How did you recognize her?” Scootaloo hissed at him.

“Leave me alone,” Apple Bloom whimpered desperately, but she wasn’t sure she said that loud enough for anybody without weird freak radar dish ears to hear it.

“She... she had her bow on,” Dinky said distantly. “That’s Apple Bloom?!” he exclaimed. “Why is she a... is that why she’s been absent the whole year? What happened to her?” Despite her fears, Apple Bloom couldn’t help but perk an ear at his tone of voice for some reason.

“You know her?” Scootaloo asked incredulously. “Where do you have classes—”

“No I—” Dinky cut in, “No, I mean, she’s your friend, and I know you. And you showed me your music video. ...a lot.”

“Yeah, okay...” Scootaloo said skeptically, “But—”

“Plus she disappeared. She’s been absent for months! There’s lots of rumors going on about what happened.” Apple Bloom unfolded a bit, laying her dumb pony body out flat again. Kids at school missed her? No, of course there were rumors. They all just wanted to know what weird thing happened to some random girl.

“Okay fine, you know her,” Scootaloo said in a disgruntled pout. “You know all about what happened then, I guess.”

There was a pause, and Dinky stated uneasily, “So, the one about the horse is true?”

“Well she did go on the ten o’clock news,” Scootaloo said, with an eye roll Apple Bloom could feel from way down here. Bloom was... finding it really difficult to remain panicked, by their almost casual tones of conversation. It was nice and dark under here and... and this Dinky fellow wasn’t going and swinging her out in public. He was Scootaloo’s date, so of course he would be cool like that, right?

Scootaloo leaned down on the table and whispered to Apple Bloom, as if Apple Bloom needed Scootaloo to lean close to hear her whisper, “Why’d you go on the news if you’re so worried about being seen?”

“Ah thought ah was gonna get dumb like a horse, and not care any more!” Apple Bloom whispered back up, as loudly as she dared.

“You’re a horse then?” Dinky asked, from right down at the level of the table. Apple Bloom’s pupils narrowed as he lifted up the tablecloth again, to peer at her curiously. “You’re so little though!” he exclaimed with honest intrigue, “And you still have your human col–”

“Back off!” Apple Bloom snapped, smacking his hand with her hoof so that he jerked back, the table cloth dropping flat again. Blushing head to... toe, yeah head to toe, that’s what she was going to admit. Blushing head to toe, Apple Bloom said, “Ah ain’t got any clothes with me. Ah’m naked under here!”

“Uuh,” Dinky said articulately, falling on his smooth, pantsed, tail-lacking ass. “B-but you just look like an anim—”

“Ah don’t feel like an animal,” Bloom said back to him, in a chastising tone. “It may not look like it, but that’s mah rear end you were oglin’!”

“Uhk,” Dinky responded in the most sophisticated of manners. Once he’d regained his ability to produce vocabulary. “B-b-but the f-fur covers...” he said in a desperate, seeking tone. Apple Bloom didn’t want to answer. She shouldn’t even give him the time of day. But he didn’t mean to. There was nothing wrong with him it was her.

“It really don’t,” she answered, in far too tiny a voice for her liking.

With audible difficulty, the boy collected himself to his feet, still leaning heavily on the refreshment table, muttering in a strained tone almost to himself, “Okay, 1) Apple Bloom: horse rumor is true. Horse, but little, size of a dog. 2) Therefore absent from school, explains need for secrecy. Conspiracy? 3) Fully sentient. Rethink my assumptions. May be alien. 4)...”

He stopped at four, and just kind of slowly turned towards Scootaloo, finally asking in a bewildered tone, “Why is she under the refreshment table, completely naked?!”

“Uhh...” Scootaloo droned in the reluctance of someone who knows the answer but doesn’t want to be seen giving it. “Our other friend is psychic,” she finally admitted, “And she had a vision, that a demon is going to attack the dance tonight, so Apple Bloom wanted to come along because it might be related to her being a pony and all and uh, it was too hard to smuggle her clothes in. It’s not like anyone was gonna see her!”

Apple Bloom was really lucky to have a friend like Scootaloo, because she did not want to have to explain something like that to a boy, pretty much ever. It kind of hit her that Dinky was even Scootaloo’s date. Had Apple Bloom really gone and flashed her rear end at her best friend’s new boyfriend? Well, more like flashed her side, because it’s not like her rear was directly pointed that way, but still.

Not like he could ever be attracted to some inhuman creature like her. He didn’t even think it was embarassing to stare at her naked. Of course she couldn’t ever threaten Scootaloo’s romantic prospects. Apple Bloom was limited to... really weird sickos, and ... she wasn’t even going to contemplate the possibility of normal horses. There had to be some of her kind out there somewhere. But could she ever be attracted to them? She tried to imagine a little pony like her, except maybe a bit squarer jaw and with a swank hairdo and a big fat Apple Bloom ceased imagining immediately and totally.

“I need to sit down,” Dinky said wearily.

“W-well c’mon then,” Scootaloo said nervously, adding, “You won’t tell anyone though? She’s just hiding there until the big thing happens, and then we’ll all go straight home.”

“Shouldn’t you tell someone about this... vision?” Dinky said warily. “I mean, demon attack? That’s pretty er, important.”

“Apple Bloom’s sister knows,” Scootaloo assured him. “She and her... friends, plus someone are going to stop her, according to the vision. A-and it might just be a mistake and nothing’s going to happen. I think they told the principal, maybe. Apple Bloom’s sister doesn’t really uh... think that it’s real. It’s just sort of... not the thing you want to miss, right?”

Dinky grumbled uncertainly, and Apple Bloom hoped Scootaloo could find it in herself to do the unthinkable. The puppy eyes. Apple Bloom shuddered at the sheer power behind those eyes. Sweetie Belle was the picture of adorable, so you expect it from her, but Scootaloo you’re looking at rough and tumble one minute, and the next suddenly you’re face to face with

“Okay, okay I won’t say anything!” Dinky said desperately. Apple Bloom scrunched her muzzle grimly. Yep, the puppy eyes.

“C’mon, let’s go dance some more!” Scootaloo said cheerfully, picking him up from the table. Hopefully not picking him up over her shoulder.

“C-can we not?” Dinky said quickly. “I really need to sit down. This dancing is just too... I mean, we can if you want but I mean...”

“Yeah, okay,” Scootaloo said with diminished enthusiasm. “Let’s just go find a bench to sit on. We can talk about... stuff, not just that I mean, but... yeah.”

Apple Bloom was almost disappointed when they walked away without even saying bye, or otherwise acknowledging her presence, but it occurred to her that she was very incognito right now, so the less acknowledging the better. She just had to hold out until the demon attacked, then she could... well, hopefully the dream princess would be there, imprisoned in a pod or something. Then they could all go home, and everything would be fine.

Oh for the love of—she forgot about the vegetable platter!

Some time later, a considerably more miserable Apple Bloom was trying to ignore her hunger pangs and just doze off or something despite the loud thumping music. Not many people came to this table, since humans didn’t have weird flat pony teeth, that needed lots of delicious vegetables that were just inches away and she couldn’t get it without everyone in the gymnasium seeing her. People came and went, and Apple Bloom certainly couldn’t ask for help from any of them. She waited for Scootaloo to come around again, for Scootaloo to remember about the starving little pony wasting away under the refreshment table. But Bloom couldn’t kid herself; Scootaloo had the attention span of a gerbil sometimes. Actually didn’t gerbils like run around on their wheel all day? That’s lots of attention! Just wheel, wheel, wheel.

Apple Bloom was so damn bored.

Her other guardian angel approached the table then, walking up furtively, then resting her slim butt against it lightly. “Uggh,” came the precious voice of Sweetie Belle, making Apple Bloom’s ears perk right up at the sound of the white pink girl. Before she could get her attention though, Sweetie started talking to herself.

“What a lovely night this is, Sweetie,” she said derisively to no one in particular, “Not so lovely as you. You’re so beautiful Sweetie, no other comes close to your beauty. What style and grace you have, Sweetie. I’m so happy to be graced with your presence!”

Apple Bloom felt like she probably shouldn’t be hearing this. Sweetie Belle never had spite like this in her tone. What was she complaining about even? But before Sweetie could storm off to wherever she came from, Apple Bloom reached out from under the table and poked the heel of one of Sweetie’s soft purple shoes. Sweetie Belle jittered to a halt, but didn’t say anything. Apple Bloom really hoped she could somehow communicate with her friend, because she needed something to snack on!

Sweetie walked back and forth a pace quickly out there, then ducked down as fast as she could, scooting her butt right under the table and pulling the tablecloth around behind the generous hair on her head. Now this really gave Apple Bloom a good idea of just how small she had become. Sweetie Belle was hunched forward all hugging her knees to fit under here, and still butting her head up against the top of the table, but as far as Apple Bloom was concerned it was a rather roomy cave.

Apple Bloom’s inferiority complex aside, her friend gangled herself right under the table, and looked at Apple Bloom with wide eyes, before whispering, “I’m so sorry! I forgot you were under here. Oh Apple Bloom, it’s so good to see you!”

“Yeah, you seem to be having...” Apple Bloom trailed off, lifting a hoof from where it was curled underneath her to wave it around vaguely, “Not a good time,” she finally settled on saying.

Sweetie frowned, and looked away guiltily. “I am having a great time!” she lied. “Octave has been nothing but good to me the entire night!”

“What’s wrong with being beautiful?” Apple Bloom asked hesitantly. “B’cause you are, y’know.”

“Yeah,” Sweetie said resentfully. “Even you see it.”

Apple Bloom stood and walked over to Sweetie, another thing she could do that the cramped girl could not. “Something’s bothering ya Sweetie,” she said concernedly, laying a hoof on the girl’s knee. “You can talk to me about it, if’n you want?”

“Everybody says I’m beautiful,” Sweetie exclaimed quickly enough to make Apple Bloom rear back just a tad. “And I am,” Sweetie said. “And there’s nothing wrong with being beautiful, and everybody loves how beautiful I am, and Octave just won’t stop telling me about it, and trying to make me feel even more beautiful.”

“He’s perfect!” she said agitatedly to the little pony. “He’s everything any girl would want. He’s polite, and nice, and confident, and really smart, and he really cares about me, and he wants me to know that I’m beautiful!”

Apple Bloom stood there, blinking. “...ah still don’t see the problem, Sweetie,” she said feeling a bit dull for not picking up on it. Actually she felt guilty for not picking up on this before. Seemed like something that didn’t start just today. Apple Bloom wished she could’ve been with her friend to support her more, this school year.

“I’m not used to being beautiful,” Sweetie said quietly. “It’s so strange the way... I mean, people like to look at me, and that’s good, and I like being beautiful for them, helping them, but it just doesn’t feel so... good. For me.”

“I used to be cute, you know?” Sweetie asked. Apple Bloom was still trying to process Sweetie’s train of thought and certainly didn’t know what to say. Thankfully the question was rhetorical. “I used to be just cute,” she repeated, “And not... beautiful. And that was fine! I just wish I could... I just...”

“Growing up is a good thing,” Sweetie asserted rotely, like she was trying to convince herself. “It means I can do more. I’m bigger and stronger, and I can do things on my own. I can learn more, and I’m not so helpless. I can help people now, and that’s a good thing!”

“But I don’t—” a sniffle cut off Sweetie Belle’s voice, as she wiped at her beautiful nose, croaking out beautifully, “I don’t want to be beautiful...”

Apple Bloom was starting to consider that maybe she wasn’t the best judge of who liked to be called beautiful. She wasn’t even a boy though, so she was supposed to understand young, teenage girls! But even as a young, teenage girl, she ain’t never felt like this. Nobody had ever called her beautiful, so uh... aw shucks, was she ugly or something?

Sweetie Belle was practically on the edge of tears under here, for no good reason. Apple Bloom hated it to death, and she hated Octave for doing this to Sweetie. But she also didn’t hate him, because here was Sweetie telling Apple Bloom something she probably never told anyone. Like tearing off a band-aid or something. So Apple Bloom just got up real close to Sweetie, and leaned her head against the girl, rubbing her little pony cheek against Sweetie Belle’s side.

Sweetie in turn wrapped her arms around an unresisting Apple Bloom and pulled her to her chest, hugging the pony tightly, and just... crying quietly. Apple Bloom knew that kind of crying, and she knew Sweetie just had to... she knew that there wasn’t anything you could say that would help. So Apple Bloom just did her best to be that teddy bear Sweetie Belle needed, and waited for Sweetie to get done with her ...thing.

Come to think on it, didn’t Diamond Tiara have this very same sort of crying? She was always butting heads with Scootaloo, but now Apple Bloom had to wonder if maybe, somewhere deep inside, Diamond Tiara wasn’t more like Sweetie Belle, on some level.

...

Nah.

After Sweetie Belle had calmed down, and placed Apple Bloom neatly on the floor in their impromptu hiding spot, saints be praised nobody had noticed them hiding under there. Or if they did notice, they were polite enough not to disturb a crying girl they heard hiding under the table. Sweetie rubbed at her face again, and pulled out a delicate handkerchief to blow her nose on. Even her nose blowing was dainty. Apple Bloom was kind of starting to see what Sweetie was on about. The question is, did Sweetie, herself?

“Ah’m gonna have to repeat mahself,” Apple Bloom said carefully, making sure she had Sweetie Belle’s full attention, “Because it sounds like you ain’t even answered the question for yourself. I’m not saying beautiful is good; ah’m asking you for an answer. What is wrong with being beautiful?”

“N-noth—” Sweetie still said habitually, but Apple Bloom urged her,

“No, really. Think about it.”

Sweetie paused, and looked between her bent legs. Without looking up she said, “It’s scary, for one thing.”

If Apple Bloom said “how so?” she’d sound like she was denying Sweetie, so she just looked at her quietly, tilting her little fuzzy pony head and holding her ears attentively, and thankfully Sweetie continued on her own at the silence.

“It’s scary because people look at me differently, like I’m a different person when I’m not. I’m afraid I can’t... be who they want me to be. It’s scary because boys... boys want to do things with me now, and I don’t know if they really like me, or if they just like how I... look. I–I’m gonna have to get pregnant some day, and have a child, and be a mother and I’m just not ready to be that!”

“And because I’m ‘beautiful’” Sweetie drawled with air quotes, “That means people are gonna try to make that happen to me sooner, and faster. As soon as they can make me want it. I can’t do anything I want, just ...be beautiful for them. And the more beautiful I am, the less bad they’ll feel about making me stop doing anything I want to do. You feel bad for a girl who’s normal, but you feel good if a beautiful girl has to spend her whole life just raising their children and being their special someone, and I just...”

“I mean I like children,” Sweetie Belle admitted. “Who could not like children? But I just wish sometimes... that I had like a... like a scar.”

“A... scar?” Apple Bloom said very hesitantly.

“Y-yeah just like a big scary scar, all across my face.” What was scary was how enthusiastic Sweetie was about this. What was even scarier was how much sense she subsequently made:

“How on earth is having a horrible scar on your face something you’d ever want?!” Apple Bloom exclaimed in horror.

“Well, I wouldn’t be beautiful,” Sweetie said pensively, and Apple Bloom had to admit, but still!

“And people would wonder how I got it,” Sweetie continued, “Like maybe I was fighting a pirate with a big wicked knife, or maybe I was in a battle with a whole army, or maybe I got it being interrogated because I wouldn’t talk. Maybe I tripped a trap in some ancient temple. They’d look at me and they’d think wow, there’s someone who used to be beautiful. I wonder what happened to them? I wonder what they did?”

She paused and added, “And they wouldn’t care what I am anymore, only what I did.”

“But uh,” Apple Bloom said worriedly, “You’re not just gonna go an’ just all go and cut yourself are ya? Because that ain’t exactly fighting pirates, it’s just kinda like lying.”

“Pff, no,” Sweetie said rolling her eyes. “I would feel so stupid, and Rarity would just die when she found out! It’d be like if you went skiing, and broke your leg after just to make people think you were um... dangerous.”

“Well, good,” Apple Bloom frumped, “Ah would just die if you did that to yourself too. Ah don’t care much if you’re all beautiful or nothing, but ah do want you to care for yourself.”

“Really I just want to go on adventures,” Sweetie sighed distantly, with a dreamy glimmer in her eye. “My life is just a big blah of doing boring things like school and dances, boys and dresses. I never get to do anything dangerous, like exploring or finding new places or you know, just jumping into it and making big things happen. I want to go to the mountains and just... jump into whatever’s over there. And if I get a scar, then too bad, because I’m not just some girl at a dance, I’m Sweetie Belle the um... Daring!”

Apple Bloom tried not to snort at that, she really did. Sweetie pouted immediately, and Apple Bloom said, “No, no I totally feel you there. Ah don’t know about all that danger, but finding places no one has seen? Going an’ uncovering mysteries an’ learning stuff for real, instead of just from in a book? Wouldn’t that be the life.”

“Yeah, well, um...” Sweetie fiddled with her fingers. “I know I can’t even um... I get hurt easily, and can’t really do any of that stuff. But it’s a fun fantasy... like I could be something special, like you.”

“Like me?” Apple Bloom asked in puzzlement.

“Yeah the whole um, pony thing,” Sweetie said, “You’re just... you can do things you couldn’t do before. Climb places, and get under things, and run just forever. I bet you could do adventures! And um, yes I know it’s different, but if I could be...” she trailed off, then giggled.

At Apple Bloom’s puzzled look, Sweetie clarified amusedly, “I sure wouldn’t be a ‘beautiful flower’ if I was a cute little pony like you.” Apple Bloom rolled her eyes, but then stopped rolling them on account of a realization on her part.

“Sweetie Belle, ah want you to promise me something,” Apple Bloom said looking her in the eyes seriously. Sweetie frowned at her concern, but Apple Bloom pressed on. “Promise me that if’n you ever get t’ choose b’tween a big ugly scar and being a cute little pony, you’ll go with the pony.”

Sweetie’s bright laugh was interrupted when her arm bumped into the leg of someone standing at the refreshment table.

“Is someone under there?” an unfamiliar boy’s voice came down

Apple Bloom’s spine went stiff, goosebumps prickling all along her back. Sweetie Belle called out more boldly than usual, “Oh, sorry. I was just um, resting one second. It’s so hard to find a moment’s peace in these dances!” She crawled out, putting herself in between the table and the boy’s feet Apple Bloom could see.

“Just, getting some refreshments, don’t mind me,” Sweetie said shakily, with a plink of food on her—dang it she was gonna leave now, and Apple Bloom still hadn’t gotten anything to eat!

“Um... okay...” the boy said uneasily, backing away from a Sweetie Belle who was probably smiling entirely too widely for his liking. Apple Bloom stuck out a hoof and poked Sweetie’s boot again, trying to get Sweetie to check on her just one more time. Sweetie didn’t bend down though, not until a while after the boy had walked off, resigned to his inability to reach around the crazy girl to get at the snack tray.

Sweetie bent over slightly then and whispered, “What? I don’t want to attract attention!”

“Celery!” Apple Bloom whispered up to her.

Apple Bloom blinked, and then said a little less enigmatically, “Gimme some celery! Ah’m hungry down here!”

There was a pause and Sweetie whispered, “It has peanut butter is that oka–”

“Ah will love you forever if you give me that celery right now,” Apple whispered out to her enthusiastically. There was more plinking sounds as Sweetie took some... things. “An’ a piece of cheese!” Apple Bloom whispered out, “Just a lil’ one!”

Sweetie looked around to see if anyone was still watching their table, then bent over and slid a plate of peanut butter celery, cheese, and carrots right up to Apple Bloom’s hungry hooves. And Sweetie also demonstrated psychic powers, or at least half a brain cell more than Apple Bloom had, because when Apple Bloom’s mouth was too full of peanut butter to ask for help, Sweetie was already in the process of sneakily lowering the punch bowl for this table all the way to the ground, standing straight, and pushing it underneath the table with the back of her foot.

“Than’ you so mush Sweethie,” Apple Bloom managed to say, after abusing that punch bowl in a way that polite little girls who had drinking cups and opposable thumbs would never do.

All Sweetie said was in a tight whisper, “I’ll watch for a while make sure nobody saw anything.” Then Apple Bloom froze at the sound of Sweetie jolting up straight. Sweetie didn’t sound alarmed though, when she just said in hot disappointment, in her normal tone of voice, “Oh, shoot. He saw me already!”

Apple Bloom got her clarification, when that smooth voiced Octave strode up saying, “Sweetie Belle, there you are! Come, the night is young. Don’t waste away your precious beauty there by the wall like a flower. To the dance floor, where your beauty can shine!”

Apple Bloom wasn’t as hungry anymore, for two reasons now. If Apple Bloom had any doubts about her understanding of Sweetie Belle’s unique predicament, as Octave dragged Sweetie back into the fray, Apple Bloom now pretty much understood exactly what was going on. Octave was laying it on thicker than butter, and if Sweetie weren’t nearly as much of a pearl as she was then he’d... probably still lay it on thick as butter but not mean it nearly as sincerely. Hm.

Honestly Bloom didn’t know how much of Octave was pomp, and how much was circumstance. Maybe he really did mean it, even if he loved being all flowery and poetic about it. But it definitely wasn’t very considerate towards Sweetie Belle. So Apple Bloom got a twisted sense of satisfaction later, when she learned that later that evening, Sweetie had finally just latched onto Diamond Tiara, killing two birds with one stone, and the two of them pretended to be kissy faced the whole evening, just so he’d know he went and pushed his girl all the way to the other side.

Yeah, Octave had a lot to think about after the Fall Formal. A lot to think about even after that, but let’s not get ahead of ourselves. For now, Apple Bloom was finally reaching some measure of content. The peanut butter celery ratio was too much, but the carrots offset that, and she could swear the cheese seemed to help with it too somehow. She had enough to eat, and a sugary drink to quench her thirst, yet another oddity of her pony metabolism. Apple Bloom could subsist on coarse hay and oats, could only manage to eat a teeny bit of fat and protein, except peanut butter for some reason, but suffered absolutely no ill effects no matter how much sugar she managed to consume.

So she was fat and happy, and the dance was winding down. Things were looking pretty good. Apple Bloom even dozed off down there, curled around the half empty tray of food. She’d sort of forgotten to look out for the demons at all at that point, and probably should have stayed a lot more alert. Yes, she definitely should have stayed a lot more alert.

Fortunately Apple Bloom was easily awoken by the concussive blast that punched a hole in the gymnasium wall, kicking her table up into the air like a dollhouse to smash upside down on the floor further down the wall with a cacophany of shattering glass and ceramic. Apple Bloom was momentarily just a little pony sitting all by herself, totally exposed there at the corner of the gymnasium, going frantic from lack of cover or concealment. However, she quickly perceived that she didn’t have to worry, because everyone was too busy running around screaming to even see her.

That blue girl with the white hair, was she riding around on some sort of cannon? BOOM Holy shit, she was!!

Author's Note

Sunset Shimmer left behind a pretty severe power vacuum.

Friendship Fails

Some three nights earlier, unconcerned with such trivial things as fall dances or popularity contests, a pair of former ponies were standing out in the night, outside in front of the school courtyard that leads to the main entrance to Canterlot High. They were both standing beside a well known but rarely noticed statue of a rearing horse right in front of the street. Though it was long past school hours, and perhaps because it was long past school hours, not many would see the two girls standing there, in the black night illuminated by the orange glow of streetlights. Not many passed by this part of town at this hour. If they did, they perhaps would think it odd to see a pair of girls just standing there with their parcels and packages, an odd dog on his haunches at their feet, as if they were waiting for a bus to arrive. Thy would probably assume a bus was about to arrive. One of these two girls had a look of barely restrained eagerness on her face, the other a look of pensive dread.

“I’m so excited!” Twilight said, beside herself with glee. Beside her was her faithful assistant Spike, who was no doubt as excited as she was, along with what one would consider a heavy sack full of books, but of course the tomes of this world were far too dangerous and disruptive to risk taking home with her. These books were, in fact, copious amounts of meticulously gathered notes by the human hand of Twilight Sparkle herself. “30 moons,” Twilight Sparkle whispered, “I can’t believe it’s finally here!”

“I am looking forward to having hands again so much,” the dog spoke up clearly but quietly, in a way dogs probably shouldn’t be speaking up. He reared up, waving his front paws as if for emphasis. Nothing accompanied him for the journey, well except for a certain ground breaking discovery in comic literature that he sort of snuck underneath Twilight’s notes, but she’d thank him once he showed the world what the human Marevalous’s secret origin story is.

“They are pretty convenient,” Twilight agreed, shouldering her bag and running those odd sensitive digits down the strap.

“You’ll be able to see all your old friends again,” Sunset Shimmer said uncomfortably. She didn’t have as much stuff as Twilight, just some items she thought she could pawn off in that world, for something useful in this world again, the next time around. The flame haired girl checked her wristwatch, saying, “Getting close to time,” in an apprehensive tone.

Twilight turned and looked at Sunset worriedly. “You don’t have to, you know,” Twilight offered. Sunset shook her head though.

“No, you were right,” Sunset said to Twilight seriously. “The secret I’ve been searching for is in the magic of friendship, and I may not have many friends left over there who haven’t gotten on with their lives, even if they remember me, but... well, there’s at least one who I really need to apologize to.”

Twilight smiled and nodded understandingly, turning to face the portal with a thought on her face. “It’s been so long,” she said in a hollow voice, then blinked, and turned back to Sunset stammering apologetically, “I–I mean no I know it hasn’t really been a long time, but for me just I mean we’re just still new at this you know?”

“Smooth,” Spike said, rolling his eyes.

Sunset chuckled mirthlessly. “It’s fine,” she said, “You enjoy yourself as much as you can. Remember your time is precious, and you have to hold onto every minute of it. They’ve been waiting all year too.”

“It’s so unfair to them,” Twilight murmured mournfully. “I just wish I could–”

“Hold that thought, Princess,” Sunset said, staring at her watch. “Annnd... midnight. The portal is open!”

“Alright!” Spike shouted cheerily. He covered his mouth with his paws and looked around nervously if anyone had heard, saying, “I mean, uh, woof woof.” As they were alone in the middle of the night, he was probably worried about nothing, but it didn’t hurt to be paranoid.

“Yess!” Twilight simultaneously squeed, bunching her hands together. “I’ll see you two on the flip side!” she cheered, striding to the portal. She hesitated though, turning back to regard Sunset worriedly repeating, “I will see you, right?”

“Yeah, yeah,” Sunset drawled, rolling her eyes. “It’s so weird getting used to being a pony again. You remember when we met. I had to keep teleporting, because I could hardly walk!”

“Yes I do,” Twilight said unapprovingly, “Too bad you weren’t clumsier, or this might never have been a problem.”

“Yeah and– and I’d still be stuck, and,” Sunset shuddered a sigh, “And wouldn’t know about what friendship could be. I know it’s selfish but–I’m really glad I fucked up, even if... I mean, stop waiting. Go and enjoy your friends! I promise I’ll follow you.”

“Do you Pinkie Promise?” Twilight asked teasingly.

“Not on your life!” Sunset declared confidently. “That girl scares the bajeebus out of me.”

Spike snickered at that.

“Very well then,” Twilight said, turning her round face toward the horse statue. “I’ll just have to trust you will go through with it, this time.”

“Don’t worry I’ll make sure she—” Spike said before getting interrupted by Twilight saying in a guiding tone,

“Don’t force her. She has to do this on her own.”

Sunset pffted, “As if that mutt could force me to do anything.”

“I am a thoroughbred dragonhound, thank you very much,” Spike pronounced teasingly, a paw raised regally.

Twilight wanted to talk to Sunset more about this, to boost her confidence, even maybe drag her through, but this was something Sunset had to do on her own. So she smiled at those two and, with visions of her friends, her real friends in her mind, Twilight turned and leaped through the portal to Equestria.

Or, she would have, if she didn’t smack face first into unyielding stone.

“Ow! Cornfeathers! Ow!” Twilight hissed, putting her hands over her nose.

“Cornfeathers was old when I was in Equestria,” Sunset said derisively. She looked at her watch again, sneering at the thing. “Stupid human technology,” she grumbled. “Must be broken again.”

“We can’t have missed it,” Twilight said with a little panic in her voice. Spike just whimpered in a doggy way, walking forward a few hesitant steps, but afraid to try the portal himself in case it really was broken, and not just a fluke.

“Don’t worry, Princess,” Sunset assured the pained girl. “I’m pretty sure I’d notice if we were three whole days late. Look, the moon is full, see? It’s just not midnight yet. My watch is off, or something.”

Twilight touched the stone statue again, finding its surface unyielding still. “Oh, I hope it becomes midnight soon,” she fretted fussily.

“We’ll just wait around,” Sunset said agreeably, sitting down and putting an arm around the other girl. “It’s already the middle of the night, so it can’t be long now.”

When dawn broke over Canterlot High, the janitor was drawn by the sound of hysterical sobs, to the strange crazy girl who did not even go to their school, who wouldn’t leave the school statue, no matter how her friend tried to console her or calm her down, until she was dragged away kicking and screaming for causing a public nuisance.

Two nights later, it was the Fall Formal, yay!

The city was quiet this time of night. The residents who worked, were done working, and the night life was pretty much absent, all those energetic students off partying at the school on the edge of town. The sounds of distant cannonfire nonwithstanding, it was a rather unremarkably peaceful quiet time of day. There was one student, well not really a student, who probably should have been having a blast, but instead she was standing in a third dingy apartment, with a paid deposit in it, but no plans for another month of rent. Sunset Shimmer was standing out on the small balcony they had on the third floor. Her hair cascaded from her head like fire, in bold bright stripes of yellow and red. They were hot colors, for a hot pony, who had grown up in the sun, but had since come to spend a lot of time in the shadows.

She picked this apartment when she wanted to watch the Formal from afar, without attending it and going through all that heartache and rigamarole. Above the everpresent glow of the electric street lights you could see the high school, all lit up and cheerful with a white light that almost looked like a crystal from here, or a star on the earth.

In her hands, the girl held a pack of cigarettes, idly at first because she was just looking out over the distance at the dance party. But she looked down at the box, and stuck a cigarette out, then slid it back in again. She stared at it dully, then tossed it aside, clattering on the cement of the balcony surface. This was supposed to be the last one, and she couldn’t spend it getting hooked on the soothing smoke from those leaves again. Not while she still had hope.

At least she still had hope.

Cement. There was another thing humans had figured out sometime during their absolutely impossible situation. It wasn’t exactly shaped pearlith, the material of choice for stone structures back home, but it was still made out of limestone for the most part, with some creative use of chemicals and fire to make sure that it didn’t harden until it had been shaped as desired. It was ugly, and rough, and dangerous to work with, but it worked. That seemed to characterise a lot of this human ingenuity, not that she could blame them.

Sunset turned and padded over the cement on her soft, sensitive feet. Feet that didn’t make any sense, since it’s not like humans could have evolved with shoes on. But feet nonetheless. She tried to remember what hooves felt like. It’d been her first time back in decades, and she hadn’t even paused to feel her old hooves. And now she might never... well, it’s nothing she couldn’t deal with. Sunset was far too used to dealing with her day to day life. She could deal with it. But she wasn’t the only one anymore. And her only real friend here was not dealing with it. At all.

The bowl of mushy oatmeal mash was untouched. Sunset didn’t know why she thought it would be. It was supposed to remind her friend of home, of her old self, but it only reminded Twilight Sparkle of home, and her old self. Something she did, and did not, want to be reminded of. Sunset stared over at the fallen girl, lying face up in the bed, next to the bed table on which the bowl had been placed wordlessly. At her feet was curled a weird colored mutt, sleeping fitfully, who would have stood out if dogs didn’t have almost as much genetic variation as human beings. Twilight was just staring up at the ceiling. She didn’t even have any notes around her. All her notes and research were in a violent disarray, thrown all around the living room. Sunset hadn’t even bothered to clean in up yet, not sure if she even should.

“Hey uh,” Sunset said to Twilight uncomfortably.

“We’ve got to check the statue again,” Twilight said emptily.

“It’s the third day, Twilight,” Sunset told her desperately. “If it was going to happen–”

“We have to try!” Twilight shouted, sitting up from where she lay. “There has to be a way back home! It can’t just... not be there!”

It was more life than the former princess had shown all day. “We can check it one more time,” Sunset said, “But there’s no reason to think maybe all this threw it off or something. There’s more magic in this world than there has ever been, and we might not be able to predict what affect it has on the portal.”

“What if we–” Twilight paused as Spike shifted restlessly against her feet. “What if it never opens?” Twilight asked quietly, clearly less quietly than she’d like. With her hair in disarray and the saddest look on her face and as big of eyes as she could make, she looked...

Sunset turned away, unable to hide a blush as she said frankly, “It will open. We just... it’s something about the apple. There’s no reason when this settles that the portal will suddenly just stop being magical.”

“Is this why Apple Bloom turned into a pony?” Twilight said at her in an angry whisper. “Could our world have ...leaked into hers somehow, and corrupted the apple sequence?”

“That doesn’t make sense, but none of this makes sense anyway, so what do I know?” Sunset looked at Twilight and shrugged casually. “She can’t be the Apple Bloom from your world, since she’s part of the time loop, and I think I’d notice if there were two Apple Blooms running around.”

Sunset winced as she realized the words ‘your world’ escaped her lips.

“It would be so much easier with our horns,” Twilight muttered grumpily. “If we could just figure out why Apple Bloom turned into a pony... that, then maybe we could replicate the process on ourselves, but we need our horns to figure out why she turned into a pony!”

“Well, we have a lot of data at least?” Sunset offered. “Those theoretical correlations between mana and spatial flux. At least we have electrothaumatic interference to measure.”

“No magically sensitive instrument is going to come close to a good old horn in your head,” Twilight stated flatly. “The best we’ve been able to measure is that Apple Bloom did, in fact, turn into a pony. And you and I both have eyes.”

Sunset frowned thoughtfully. “Well if she had a luminate—”

“Could we just go to the portal already, and see if it’s open?” Spike asked, speaking up in a more jaded tone than usual. “If you two get into talking theories again, none of us are going to get any sleep!”

“Sorry, Spike,” Twilight said with a half smile. “We’ll just check it really quick, to make sure its period has translated rather than merely truncated.”

“It’s... period translated?” Spike said tilting his head with a doggy whine in his throat.

“If it hasn’t opened for a shorter time, rather than opening at a different time entirely,” Sunset translated.

“Well don’t just sit there,” Spike said sitting on the bed to the two girls standing beside him, “Let’s go check it out!”

Meanwhile, after dark, at a certain high school you may have heard of, in the gymnasium auditorium, in the middle of an auspicious high school dance, a little pony known as Apple Bloom was pretty sure the pink girl with the blue hair was winning, for what counts as winning. She had a whole pile of minions she called “followers” who were driving the competition to the floor by peppering them with what appeared to be canned sardines.

But one rose before the assault, the one with the cannon, and she shoryukened the other girl right off the stage. The pink one countered, sacrificing her followers to the graveyard to untap her island giving her one extra mana to— okay somehow they were playing cards now, and Apple Bloom was too busy looking frantically for her friends to pay much more mind to their proceedings.

The gas grill at the more popular refreshment station had tipped over in the chaos, and was belching columns of fire into the air, illuminating screaming students, and for some reason the sprinkler system wouldn’t come on. A janitor was basically hurling fire extinguisher tanks at it whole, screaming “YEAHHHH” every time they burst on impact in a volumnuous shower of fire retardant foam. Apple Bloom dodged ...that, then thought she spotted a lick of purple hair, so she ran for the overturned table, ignoring the princesstrial candidates on stage, who continued to shout.

“You may have Trixie in a headlock,” exclaimed the blue girl as the two grunted in a tight tense wrestling embrace, the crowds around them cheering on their favorite, “But you cannot imprison Trixie’s greatness!”

One scuffle later and the pink girl with the blue hair shouted back, “You can piledrive me all you want!” Maybe if she’d just use third person, someone would remember her name, but alas she did not. “But everyone will still love m—” she got cut off by the impact, her hard head breaking the stage, and sending a spotlight swinging down, its broken cable sparking with electricity.

“Scootaloo, there you are!” Apple Bloom shouted, gallopping up to the girl who had taken refuge behind a fallen table, against the flying debris, the paintballs, the copious amounts of streamers flying everywhere. Together with Scootaloo was that dark suited blonde boy, who was looking really out of his element crouched there like that. He took one look at Apple Bloom, and deliberately turned to look over the edge of the bench, as if scanning for hostiles.

Oh, right. The whole naked thing.

“Oh, skip it!” Apple Bloom shouted at him. “Just don’t look at mah butt and it’s fine!” She was too excited to be ashamed at this point. Besides she’d already been running all over the place now, and anyone who spotted her had just rubbed their eyes, then poured their glass back into the punch bowl. This definitely was too much of a disaster to worry about some little pony, although Apple Bloom didn’t see any demons yet.

“Scoots, what happened?” Apple Bloom asked in utter confusion, “Ah was under the table, an’ it all—boom!”

“There was a dispute over Fall Formal Princess,” Scootaloo snarled, “The blue one won by a single vote, and the the pink one challenged her to a duel, and they just had all this stuff ready for it, like they were planning on it all along!”

Another explosion shook the building, sending plaster raining down on the three of them.

“We have to get out of here!” Scootaloo exclaimed, pulling Dinky’s head down, right before a folding chair hurtled over the table, barely missing clipping him in the head. “But I don’t know where Sweetie Belle is, or Diamond Tiara!”

“We gotta make sure they’re safe!” Apple Bloom shouted. “Ah cain’t get a ride with Rarity, without Diamond’s dress to hide me! An’ also they’re our friends!”

“My mom will give you a ride!” Scootaloo shouted over the din, “But they won’t leave without us, so we gotta find them! Just, if you spot the other girls, we can all make a break for it!”

Apple Bloom nodded curtly, and turned her ears to listen around. It wasn’t long before she heard the familiar sound through the smokey dusty partial visibility in the gym, of Sweetie Belle shouting, “Apple Bloom!” and “Scoota—” then she got cut off briefly, then belted out, “Scootaloo! Where are you!”

“She’s over there!” Apple Bloom shouted to the two of them. When they just looked at her blankly, she shouted, “Where mah ear is pointing!” Apple Bloom ran off in that direction, the two kids running along behind, just as some huge impact came down, obliterating their table behind them, shaking the ground with its intensity.

“That was close!” Scootaloo shouted.

“What was that?” Dinky shouted too, his curly locks all sweaty from keeping up with the two of them.

“Water balloon, I think,” Scootaloo said speculatively.

“It was the size of a bus!” Dinky answered in agitation.

“A bus?” Scootaloo said disbelievingly, “That was barely the size of a coupe!”

“Sweetie, can ya hear me!” Apple Bloom shouted, searching around until Sweetie burst out of the crowd to envelop Apple Bloom in her arms and hair, in a big hug shouting,

“You’re okay!”

While Apple Bloom tried to breathe, Diamond ran up behind Sweetie, with some sort of weapons assembly in her arms that looked kind of like an automatic giant rubber band launcher. Diamond had a rough look to her like she got a faceful of explosion, that covered her face and the whole front of her dress in black soot. “C’mon, let’s get out of here!” she shouted.

Sweetie dropped Apple Bloom to her hooves, and they waited while Diamond covered for them with suppressing fire. Dinky and Scootaloo ventured ahead cautiously to check the exit. The two came back through the smoke, and Dinky shouted,

“It’s no good! The doors are blocked by pie! There’s no way out!”

“No way out?” Diamond said with a dangerous look in her eyes, “Then we’ll have to like, make a way out.”

One well intentioned escapade with a cannonball later (not the cannon) and the heavily damaged wall broke open in a shower of plaster. That was about when the fire sprinklers came on, blasting all the flame retardant foam in a redundant layer of cold water. Everyone was instantly soaked, and spluttered as they staggered out into the hallway. Apple Bloom shook herself off and looked at her companions...... oh right, that Dinky boy was still with them. He kind of, had that moonstruck look to him, like he just saw a naked girl shake herself off like a dog or something.

“It’s fine!” Apple Bloom exclaimed self consciously, dashing off on her hooves to drag a discarded tablecloth back with her in her...mouth. “Y’all dry off with this!” she said throwing it at the four of them. There was a thundering explosion then, the gas main or something, that sent Apple Bloom and Scootaloo both scrambling for cover.

Apple Bloom gave Scootaloo a wan look from underneath the tablecloth and said, “Ah’m a little pony. What’s your excuse?”

“Fast reflexes,” Scootaloo answered smoothly.

“I think it’s winding down anyway,” Sweetie Belle said to them consolingly, leaning over the tablecloth and watching the diminishing violence within.

Apple Bloom exclaimed in a tight reedy whisper from underneath the tablecloth torn from the remains of the refreshment table, “Ah cain’t believe y’all talked me into this!”