Breaking ponies

by anthrolover

Rating: mature
Tags: Main 6, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Sad, Other, Spike, Comedy, Tragedy, Random, Shining Armor, Discord, Crossover
Length: 1330

a combonation of breaking bad and my little pony.

Spike discovers he has cancer so he decides he wants to make a little money before he dies so he leave twlight with some money before he passes away. together with Shining Armor (nicknamed armor through the story) they sell meth to ponyville and eventually equestria but theres trouble along the way.

Published 2012-05-05 05:24:02 UTC
Last updated 2012-05-05 05:24:02 UTC

cancer dragon

NOTE: this may have shitty grammar/spelling please ignore it.

a large mobile enchanted apple stand is driving down the new appaloosa desert. spike is driving with a gas mask on with shining armor next to him passed out with a gas mask. in the back there are two stallions appearing dead that are on the floor. the apple stand crashes and spike drags armor out. he makes a memory orb " im sorry twlight i only wanted to make some cash before i die so then you could at least no longer work for celestia if you didnt want to" siren wails" good bye twlight" he drops the orb and runs over to the road and he waits for the police to arrive while he holds a magic blaster in his hand.the sirens get closer and then he flashbacks.4 days eariler. a doctor stallion is speaking with him. " spike we have some bad news apperntly you have cancer " spike is shock and flashbacks " come on spike drink the toxic waste your a dragon your not going to get effected" says a dragon" okay fine" says spike. he gulps down the waste as dragons cheer him on.he returns back to the stallion." spike i know its alot to take in but its okay i would like to start chemo therapy as soon as possible. spike repiles " ill think about it okay" he leaves. later that night he tells twlight sparkle" SPIKE YOU HAVE CANCER OMG THIS ISN GOOD" spike says " its okay im going to get chemo" twlight then repiles " where will you get the bits to pay for the chemo" spike says " im sure celestia can give us some bits" twlight repiles" okay spike ill let you talk with princess celestia".the next day spike bumps into shining armor " oh hey spike whats up" spike replies nothing much i need to make cash quick" armor replies " are you will to do illegal things" spike says " im not going to be a gigalo if your asking that okay. armor says " no no no we can make "crystal" meth ( pun not intended) you would make alot of money" spike thinks" hmmm okay you got a deal ill help out ill give you my life savings" spike hands armor 700 bits " whats this for "armor says. " buy a mobile apple stand okay were going to cook in that also thats the money to buy the material" spike says. " okay i got it lets cook tommorrow" he says. the following day they cook.after cooking for a few hours they make the purest meth in all of equestria. armor says " DAMMMN thats some clear meth bro you are a artist at this" spike repiles " its just stuff i picked from twlight anyways go meet up with the guys". armor meet up with two stallions the following day." yo where you find this meth" says the first stallion." i cooked it "says armor. the second one says " you didnt cook this shit man stop lieing take us to the cook "says the second stallion as he points a magic blaster at him." okay he going to be here tommorrow" says armor. the following day they meet up. they beat up armor with some brass hooves.then they take spike hostage. " hey teach us how to cook that holmes" says the first one. spike replies" okay". he begins the process but then shoots his fire breath at the pot shooting toxins into the air. he escapes and puts a mask on armor and himself. the other two stallions suffocate.then spike gets in the car and drives.a large mobile enchanted apple stand is driving down the new appaloosa desert. spike is driving with a gas mask on with shining armor next to him passed out with a gas mask. in the back there are two stallions appearing dead that are on the floor. the apple stand crashes and spike drags armor out.spikes flashback is over.and he sees the fire dept runs by. he hides the blaster as they run by.he sighs and laughs " whew that was a close one" he walks back and puts armor in the apple stand and drives away.

does hydrofluoric acid melt through plastic i think not

armor wakes up later " dude hes still alive i see the stallion moving".spike replies" uhh no he cant survive that its impossible"armor replies " well hes moving right now what do we do"spike says " we gotta melt the bodies its the only way so we can avoid the cops".armor says " how are we going to melt some bodies"spike replies " we will need some hydrofluoric acid,a plastic tub and a hacksaw".armor replies okay gotcha ill go get the stuff". a little while later he pours the acid into his tub insead of the plastic. he cuts the stallion into pieces and tosses him into the tub as he melts it stinks up the place.many hours later.
spike says " okay when are we going to melt him" armor says " already did man i melted him in my tub see no need to get that plastic shit ". the bathroom breaks and water goes everywhere.spike says " oh really you sure about that".after executing the survivor and melting him too both spike and armor need a new buyer. armor says " i heard a minator named Iron Will is looking for some buyers". spike replies " even if he does buy were out of alicorn milk so we cant make jack shit"but then spike pauses and thinks"i got it if we steal a barrel of fillydephia's finest black pegasus oil we wouldnt need the damn alicorn milk, but we would need alot more tools in order to cook it P2P style(pony 2 pony)".armor replies " like what".spike says" we would need a larger oven and also a new area this form of making meth makes alot of smoke very smelly smoke this smoke would give us away just like that so maybe a basement but we would need gas mask so we wouldnt passout from the horrible smell"."well im out so go get the suppiles okay and try to make Iron Will deal with us okay since that stallion is dead now".says spike. a few hours later.rarity says " spike i cant believe you have cancer oh poor spikiy wikiy its okay rarity is here". she hugs him so tight her cleavage is suffocating him.rainbow dash says " oh thats too bad you have cancer but that doesnt mean you should be suffocated to death by rarities titties".applejack whispers " let the little rascal enjoy it i mean who knows how long he will live before his cancer catches up with him".spike enjoys the attention he rechieves. later that night why he sleeps the girls talk. fluttershy says " so how long will he live". twlight says " im not sure maybe a few months a year at tops".pinkie pie says " we should throw him a goodbye enjoy dying of cancer party".rainbow dash rudely says " pinkie thats retarted you will only bum him out more". rarity says " well he cant die a virgin i will volenteer my virginity in order for spike to die like a man". twlight replies " rarity you dont have to do that".rarity responds " nonsense he cant die a virgin" later at night spikes gets a phone call. armor says " the jizz has entered the pussy and is making its way to the egg". spike says " cut the crap dont talk in code" armor replies " Iron Will has decided to trade with us were cooking tommorrow okay". spike mumbles " yeah yeah i know". he hangs up.the next morning spike is eating cereal when twlight says to spike " spike chemo starts today ". spike looks up from his cereal bowl.