Chemistry Lessons

by sunnypack

Rating: everyone
Tags: My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy, Other, Slice of Life, Twilight Sparkle
Length: 1395

Twilight is teaching you chemistry, and you're eager to learn, just not from Twilight.

It starts innocuously. You accidentally apply late for a mentor. Every mentor is taken... Well not every mentor. There's still one left. Twilight Sparkle. Huh. Wait, Princess Twilight Sparkle?!

A lesson in chemistry starring you!

Edited by Word Worthy.

Published 2015-02-01 15:40:01 UTC
Last updated 2015-02-01 15:40:01 UTC

1 - Hydrochloric Acid

Chapter 1: Hydrochloric Acid

In Twilight’s new castle there is a strange door.

Unlike the rest of the crystal castle which had some peculiar doors, namely to do with the materials it was composed of, this door was made of simple wood and metal. Twilight in particular had conjured this door for the express purpose of ‘ease of entry’ into this particular room of her castle.

Heavy wooden panels for double doors, large crystal growths and hardened stone, were hardly suitable materials for the door to her laboratory.

You reflected on these sorts of ‘fun’ facts that Twilight had recited to you as she lead you to the small laboratory down at the basement level of her castle. Though it was the basement, she assured you, it was situated in the a place with plenty of ventilation and atop bedrock. You couldn’t burn a hole through the floor like she did earlier. Not that that was safe practice or anything, something she assured that you would take very careful note of.

You open the door and head inside the lab. You notice on the door, there is a scribbled note telling ponies that there were dangerous chemicals and hazardous materials inside. In particular, you note the MSDS for hydrochloric acid. You noted it first because it was one of the first chemicals you learned in high school. You swallow in trepidation. Dangerous chemicals, check. Swanky facilities, check.

Twilight sat down on the one stool occupying the small room. The lab was filled with chemicals filling the room with strange and pungent aromas. You thought you smelled cloves. Are you extracting natural oils? Perhaps you will be engaging in organic chemistry? You shudder. Organic chemistry had some tough theory, all those mechanisms you couldn’t wrap your head around…

Twilight cleared her throat waving a hoof to distract you from looking around at all the various chemicals scattered around the lab.

“Hello again,” she greeted awkwardly, her voice echoing around the confined space a little more than she intended from the way her ears flattened. “Welcome to my lab,” she continued after a short pause.

You nod hesitantly and stand a few feet away from her. You look around for a seat of your own. Maybe it was hidden under one of these lab benches?

“Sorry,” she said sheepishly, once again distracting you from your examination of the room. “I usually work alone, so there aren’t any other seats in the room.” She shook her head. “But you aren’t here to sit down, you’re here to learn!” She tapped a hoof to her chest. “You’ve come to the right pony to assist you.” Twilight seemed caught up in the moment and she let loose what you could only describe as a ‘delighted squeal’. “I’m so excited to have a student of my own! Especially one as focused on science as you.” She seemed to catch herself in the act of being excited and visibly composed herself. Inexplicably, a mantle of authority wrapped around her. Perhaps this is what she thought a teacher would behave like?

Truthfully, you weren’t as excited to see Twilight as she was to see you. In fact, Twilight was one of the last ponies you had wanted to see as your mentor. Your only desire was to complete some credits for your course and complete your degree. You’d be happy to just sit in a lab all day working for a pharmaceuticals company until you retired. That was your plan.

With a little research you found out that the Board offered students to apply for a mentor. Upon completion of the program you completed a senior level unit and it was virtually unheard of anypony receiving less than full marks. Easy credits. But, you were late, really late for the application rounds and every mentor had already been assigned. Your faculty had pointed imperiously at the Dean’s office, where you had sat uncomfortably, reflecting on how it was a good idea to submit applications earlier and not forget these sorts of things like the dumb bird-brain you were.

Fortunately, there had been a solution. A proposed solution that included the highest ranking graduate the University had ever seen in last decade, not to mention the century. The youngest too. The protégé of Princess Celestia herself and not only that, she’d become a Princess too! The University had told you that Princess Twilight Sparkle (they’d stressed the title to you) had expressed keen interest in the mentoring program. Accepting it was a great honour.

The problem was, her legacy far exceeded the modest goals of any of the students. Everypony had been daunted. Even the Dean, and she was a severe mare not to be trifled with. You knew because you had sat in her office while the Dean had steepled her hooves and peered at you with a gaze that looked deep into your soul. She stressed to you that Twilight had applied yet again to become a mentor this year. Predictably, she had received no applications. Rather than risking the disappointment of one the greatest alumni the University had, they decided that you were a good candidate for tuition.

The Dean had seen the refusal build up in your eyes. No, no way could you become the student of Princess Twilight Sparkle. That was pressure you weren’t even prepared for. You weren’t even sure you could ever prepare for pressure of that magnitude. Sure you were adept at your subject, but you weren’t stellar… How would you even begin to comprehend the bequest that Twilight had made to scientific community? She published a new paper every month! It staggered the mind.

The Dean had smiled in a way that you could only describe as devilish. Take it, she had proclaimed, or you can find another University to study in. You doubted she could expel you from the University but the threat had been clear. Take it, or life could be made very difficult for you. If that sort of situation couldn’t set your teeth on edge, you didn’t know what would.

Granted, Twilight looked a little nervous too, as if she was unsure of herself. How could a pony so accomplished and so perfect be nervous? She’d been on the front cover of Neighture thrice in the last year for pony’s sake! Your hooves were shaking a little, but you forced yourself to relax. She wouldn’t ask you to do anything hard for the first day, would she? It was just an introduction and safety tour, then off to home, right?

You feel your eyes unfocus as they try to recall all the organic reaction mechanisms. Grinyard, Wittig Olefination…

Twilight cleared her throat and your eyes twitched back to her. She’s still seated on the stool but she seemed more amused rather than nervous now.

“You seem a little distracted?” she queried and you shake your head doggedly.

“Me? Distracted? No, of course not. Certainly not because I’m trying to remember every organic mechanism so I won’t look like a foal in front of one of Equestria’s most accomplished scientists. No, not because of that,” you babbled. Then you realised you had indeed made a foal of yourself.

Twilight blushed at the compliment but also grinned. She placed a hoof over her muzzle to stifle a chuckle, but the shake of her shoulders betrayed the emotion. You stare at her in exasperation and then purse your lips, accepting your fate as being laughed at by one of the most famous scientists in the community and beyond.

“Good,” she laughed out loud, no longer trying to hide her mirth. “Because we’re going to start with inorganic chemistry.”

Well, shoot.

Author's Note

MSDS for hydrochloric acid.

Chemistry is fun!

Next Chapter: Chemistry is magic.

As always, my chemical readers, thanks for reading!

P.S. If I didn't love chemistry so much I would probably be motivated to learn everything if Twilight was my mentor.
P.P.S. This fic will not require any knowledge of chemistry, but use of terms may exceed high-school level chemistry. Full enjoyment of this fiction can be obtained by completing a chemistry degree and becoming one of us...
P.P.P.S. This may have a few mistakes, I'm trying to keep to my promise that I'd publish roughly one fic a day. Am I doing it right?!