Short Flights And Failed Takeoffsby Snakeskin DucttapeChaptersAn Unannounced VisitorOne, Single Joke That's taken From The InternetEquestria, The Land Of Free Love. Vol 1Xenophilia: Et In Equestria EgoSolder In EquestriaSunset Shimmer Fucks A HorsePinkie SensesMLAABQ Gaiden: Magical ExpertiseMLAABQ Gaiden: A Most Unexpected Avenue Of AttackThe Tale That Set Everything RightFifty Thousand Zebras With Vuvuzelas Visit CanterlotMLAABQ Gaiden: Celestia's Morning GreetingMLAABQ Gaiden: Going Hump In The NightMLAABQ Gaiden: Sweet And Unusual Punishment part oneMLAABQ Gaiden: Sweet And Unusual Punishment part twoMLAABQ Gaiden: Temporal DisplacementMLAABQ Gaiden: Roll For InitiativeStory DEMO: Dash Tries To Light Your FartMLAABQ Gaiden: Sharing CultureStory DEMO: Humans Are CRAZY!Twilight Is An Alicorn Who Outlived All Her FriendsMLAABQ Gaiden: Reverse-Toothfairy-Batman-ProsthetistMLAABQ Gaiden: She Came In From Another DirectionSnakeskin Ducttape's Alpha Centaur: Alien CrossfireMLAABQ Gaiden: Lingual HindrancesMLAABQ Gaiden: Gabe and Armor Arrives EarlyStory Demo: Sunset Shimmer Ends Up At HogwartsMLAABQ Gaiden: A Pop Culture ReferencePony People With Pony NamesMLAABQ Gaiden: Sing Me A SongAn Unannounced VisitorSeen from the sky, the district would have looked almost completely square. At the center of the city were the office-buildings and expensive restaurants. Moving northeast from there, you’d first pass through residential areas of varying status and quality, then to warehouses and businesses, hardware stores and car-dealers. After that, you’d reach the medium-and-light industry-sector of the city. There, in the early hours of the day, the broad, heavy traffic-accommodating streets were overflowing with people going to work, leaving entire suburbs almost empty during work-hours. Then, nine hours later, the reverse happened. The streets of the small & medium-industry-sector were filled, and then emptied as the blue-collars and small business-owners went home to where society stored them between work-days. It wasn’t an unusual sight to see stray cars and people after this, though. Most people who spent their days here knew what workaholics the owners of smaller business could be. One of these not-unusual sights would be a woman stepping out of a car. What was unusual about this was her striking appearance in this bleak autumn afternoon. Celestia’s gaze slowly travelled over the mostly-still surroundings, the somewhat sombre feel of the place being compounded by the grey sky, leaf-covered ground still wet from recent rain, and the dull sounds of car-tires on asphalt in the distance. After consulting a note on her hand, Celestia walked up the asphalt-ramp between somewhat wild-grown bushes and birch trees, the effort of making an industrial-zone more aesthetically appealing not working as intended at this time of year. It was a building of corrugated steel and reinforced windows. Heavy doors to accommodate the shipping of heavy equipment were placed next to a modest reception-entrance. The windows were caked with grime which seemingly obscured only darkness, the little of the interior which could be seen from the outside being dusty workbenches with worn tools and forgotten binders. Celestia’s steps took her through a trail in the birch-leaves clearly made by a motorcycle. The leaves, she noted, seemed to have been accumulated for several years. The door would held in place by a steel chain, twined several times around the large push-plate in black plastic, and one of the stout metal supports for the small roof sticking out from the building, which she was currently loitering beneath. It offered no hindrance to anyone anymore, though, one of the links having been severed and the chain hung beside the door. She was entering uninvited, but not discreetly, as she did not come here to harm or steal. A few knickknacks and small pieces of junk, obviously from the factory-floor, were disturbed by the door as she pushed it open. Inside, she was first met with a mess. The mat in the short hallway was absolutely filthy from use. Celestia had been certain she was in the right place before, but seeing the tire-tracks in the grime confirmed it. Sunset Shimmer lived in this place. Beside the carpeting, the corridor Celestia found herself in only contained an umbrella-stand and a small, plastic palm-tree. As she took a few steps into the gloom, a sliver of trepidation crept into her chest at what she saw. The umbrellas in the stand obscured a baseball-bat, and the pot hid a hammer. Celestia looked at them, hints of worry and contemplation playing across her face. After noting that they were dry and somewhat clean, she pushed on. A small, uninteresting, and almost empty office was to her left. She ignored it and walked on to where the left wall ended, opening up into the factory-floor, with some doors on her right. The weak, grey light of a cloudy autumn afternoon was the only source of illumination, almost making the scene resemble a cave of monsters from some fantasy-story or other, but all was still and quiet Celestia spotted a switch on the wall. Pressing it did nothing for a few seconds, until the fixtures hanging from the ceiling came to life, one by one. At least the survivors of seemingly long neglect did. Celestia slumped slightly and let out a sigh. Sunset Shimmer had access to electricity, though that also have meant that one of her students might have had messed around with industrial-grade circuit-breakers. Large parts of the factory floor were bare, though none of it was clean. Layers of dust covered everything from the fixtures hanging from the ceiling to the cold concrete floor, though some of the shelves seemed more like it was cocooned by it. A few areas were taken up by workbenches and tool-racks, mostly empty. A few worn hammers and pliers could be found here and there, but it was mostly junk and scrap, broken desk-lamps, pieces of plastic tags, and such, with a few scorch-marks around a rusty soldering-station. Metal shavings littered the floor around an empty stand, hinting at what type of machine had once stood there, and the large shelves found alongside two of the walls were completely bare of anything but dust. Celestia took it all in with with an almost impatient look, then walked back to the light.switch and the unexplored rooms. If there ever was anything of value here, it was long gone now. The few things that remained wouldn’t give enough scrap-money for a single meal. The only thing that stood out was a part of the wall beside the light switch, where an area the size of a textbook looked fresher and covered in newer dust. Celestia eyed it with mild curiosity before dismissing it and turning off the light. One of the doors led to a changing-room, with a toilet and a roomy shower area. Celestia was lucky that she was advancing as slowly and methodically as she did, or she might have tripped when her foot touched the large, thick plank nailed to the floor. She eyed the plank with curiosity before she noticed the longer plank leaning against the wall beside her, perfect in length to jam the door she had just entered through. Switching on the light, she almost let out a small gasp at the sight, before she dismissed the fear with the help of reality. A clothing rack and hat shelf-combo took up the long wall to the side of the door, where more than a dozen black garbage bags hung in a row, at first seeming like they could accommodate humans. Celestia softly pulled at the edge of one of them, revealing only clothes in Sunset Shimmer’s size. Opening the door into the shower-area, Celestia’s eyes narrowed slightly at another strange and somewhat uncanny sight. On the tile-floor of the showers stood a faded, plastic patio-chair, together with a large numbers of PET bottles, a foot-bath tub, and a pair of kitchen-pots. Shower-supplies stood underneath the same shower-head that the chair stood under, and the area directly around it was scrubbed relatively clean, standing out starkly against the surrounding tiles brown with chalk, soap-residues, and the occasional trace of mold. The bathroom revealed nothing out of the ordinary. Only a single toothbrush and tube of toothpaste. Celestia set the tap to lukewarm and opened the flow of water. After twenty seconds, she felt certain that this place provided nothing but ice-cold, though thankfully clean, water. Celestia walked out of the restroom-area and into what was apparently a break-room with a kitchenette. There, another collection of PET bottles and pots on the stove provided Celestia with a significant clue as to the purpose of the out-of-place objects in the shower. A small amount of dishes were drying on a rack beside the sink, the cupboards revealing only a few more plates, bowls, and other kitchen-utensils, together with a few tin cans of fruit. The table was empty, except for a few crumbs on the cloth beside a toaster. A slight hum came from one of the fridges, that one containing some cartons of milk, some butter and little else. The silent one containing only cheap cereals and half a loaf of bread. Celestia moved to the final and largest room, not counting the factory floor. This one was in the best shape, though it took a few moments to discern this, as the lights in the ceiling were missing, and the windows were covered up. Moving forward to the desk, Celestia turned on the lamp sitting on top of it, and let out a small cry of shock when she processed what rested on the bookshelf behind the desk, the first sound she could not hold in for this little investigation. Her short-lived confusion about the bare area on the wall in the factory-floor had been answered. In the bookshelf laid a pair of first aid-kits. The supplies of one of them were half-depleted. Celestia closed her eyes, and let out a long sigh before continuing. The windows were covered mostly by old newspapers, duct tape, and pieces of curtains. The desk-drawers and bookshelves revealed a number of textbooks on her school’s curriculum, a number of book advanced beyond that, as well as a somewhat battered laptop. At the far end of the room was an old couch with a floor-lamp next to it. The light from the desk didn’t reach that far, and the gloom hinted only of a shape lying prone on it. Celestia walked softly towards the couch, but stopped when the light revealed a pair of empty tin cans hanging from the ceiling in a hook, connected by a fishing-line going out into the doorway. Celestia frowned, continued towards the couch, and turned on the lamp. A makeshift bedding covered the couch. Stale newspapers lay on top of a pair of banners that had gone missing from a school sporting-event last year. Celestia cautiously reached out a hand and peeled away the makeshift cover, revealing only more cloth. A torn off office chair-cushion in a pillowcase and one of the couch’s backrests made up the place to rest the head, while a duvet made up the base of the bedding, and an old trench-coat presumably provided some additional warmth. In the stillness, Celestia had tuned out the faint, ambient sound of cars travelling in the distance. That all stopped when she heard a clear sound coming from the glass door she had first entered through, and she whipped up her head to better make out the almost-minute sound. The sound suddenly stopped halfway, and Celestia hesitated. Unless Sunset had seen Celestia’s non-salient car, and only now registered it as hers, Celestia could not see what would give Sunset pause. No light spilled out from the windows, and she had disturbed nothing. The sound of the door closing, and steps moving away from the door, told her that Sunset was more clever, and more paranoid, than Celestia gave her credit for. As the steps suddenly became slower and heavier, and Celestia suddenly remembered the debris she had disturbed with the door on her way in. She peeled away some of the paper covering the window, it too being reinforced, to see Sunset Shimmer jumping on her motorcycle mid-run, and driving around the corner. Celestia hurried out of Sunset’s ‘bedroom’, out of the building, through the tracks in the leaves, and onto the road, only to see a black-clad figure with a hint of fiery red hair beneath her helmet speeding away into the distance. One, Single Joke That's taken From The InternetApplejack was taking a break from her farm work and was leaning against the fence that surrounded Sweet Apple Acres, while conversing with Fluttershy who had brought her some refreshments as repayment for Applejack's help in repairing Fluttershy's chicken-coop. A few of Fluttershy's animal-friends had joined her in her little stroll to Sweet Apple Acres, passing by the neighboring apiary. Fluttershy suddenly turned away from Applejack and softly called out to one of her friends who had approached the apiary's honeycombs. "Now, now, Mr Badger, that honey's not yours." Her friend stopped mid track just steps away from the honeycombs and turned back, sauntering towards the two ponies as he was assaulted by hundreds of bees. Applejack's eyes went wide as Mr Badger was stung dozens of times during his casual stroll towards them. "Doesn't that bother him none?" she asked. "Oh, no" Fluttershy said in her normal soft voice and slowly shook her head. "Honey Badger doesn't care. Honey Badger doesn't give a shit." Equestria, The Land Of Free Love. Vol 1Twilight Sparkle was a scholar. Applejack was a farmer. The two ponies relied on vastly different amounts of food-intake. When Applejack first met Twilight about an hour ago she could tell that Twilight's strength was not in physical prowess. She had first assumed that the visitor was some sort of clerk, but Twilight had later clarified that she was Princess Celestia's personal protegé. Either way it explained Twilight's city-slicker behavior to the farm pony. On the issue of the amount of food they craved, Applejack was at first a bit worried about Twilight's eating habits. She was getting full very early and still seemed to hurry for some reason. Twilight for her part felt that she had made a mistake in treating this hearty meal the way she usually treated meals, as an unfortunately necessary distraction away from her scholarly pursuits. And so with her tummy having protested loudly on and off for the last fifteen minutes she was surprised when Applejack, who was sitting next to her, asked "Getting a bit full there, miss Sparkle? Would you like another kind of pie?" Twilight raised her eyebrow's at the farm pony. "More pie? Ugh no thank you, Applejack, my stomach can't take anymore." Applejack chuckled. "I wasn't talking about the kind of pie you swallow, sugarcube. I think you might like this one. It helps you relax, and that helps your digestion." "What do you mean?" Twilight asked, completely oblivious at what Applejack was insinuating. Applejack chuckled again and rose slightly from her seat. "You must have a different way of talking over there in Canterlot," she said and gestured to her rear which she jiggled as Twilight looked. "I'm talking about my pie." Should any individual from a vastly different culture have been sitting at the table at that instance, they might have been more than a little surprised at the conversation so far, especially how utterly unabashed everypony involved was and how uninterested everypony within earshot was. But this was only the beginning. "Oh," Twilight said. "Yeah, sure, when?" "Well, you said that you were in a bit of a hurry so don't worry. We can do it fast," Applejack said. "That's considerate of you," Twilight said and turned to her other side. "Spike? Will you be okay alone for a little while." Spike, who was involved in a very pleasant discussion with Applejack's younger sister, simply waved his claw and without looking back. "Alright," Twilight said. "Lead the way." Applejack started walking away from the big outdoor-table towards the farmhouse. "Let's do it indoors, it's a busy day here and we don't want to get in anypony's way." Twilight thought this sounded reasonable. They entered the farm house, went into Applejack's room and had a wonderful time together. Applejack was right, her pie certainly helped Twilight feel all better, but Twilight doesn't always learn from her mistakes and once more overindulged quite a bit. - It was looking bleak for quite a while there but the night was shaping up to be quite wonderful. Twilight was experiencing her first slumber part with two very good friends. "So... who's up for another slumber party tomorrow night?" Twilight asked. The resulting, good-humored barrage of pillows she got in her face told her that both of her friends thought it best to do so another time. And Twilight's offer of postponing the event was met with more laughter and pillows. Twilight would never be upset with her friends for something as simple as declining a slumber party, but it was clear that her friends wouldn't budge and she decided that they had to make the best of the event. "Oh! I almost forgot since the book neglected to mention it! Do you two want to have sex?" Twilight asked. Realization dawned on Rarity's face. "Of course, darling. You didn't ask and I was starting to think that I did something wrong last time." "Oh! No no!" Twilight said. "I just assumed that it would be covered later in the book and forgot when the whole thing with the tree branch happened. So how about it?" "Well sure we do!" Applejack said. "We were mighty tempted to have a go at each other earlier but we didn't want to keep you up." "That's a relief," Twilight said. "I was starting to think you didn't want to do it with each other." Rarity gasped and put her hoof to her barrel dramatically. "Not making love to Applejack? Banish the thought, darling! It's such a pleasant way to solve frustrations concerning her." Applejack turned to Rarity with a smug look on her face. "Right back at you, sugarcube. I haven't had an argument with you in forever, I was starting to miss this." "Then I shall have to make something absolutely outrageous sometime soon," Rarity said and shot Applejack a sultry look. Twilight considered this for a moment. "I wonder if that could be another letter for the princess sometime," she said ."Alright then, let's go." The trio trotted up the stairs and did what friends in Equestria does best. The more the merrier. - Applejack and Rainbow Dash had finally finished with their work after the Running of The Leaves and were heading to the Apple-family farm. "You wanna rest up your wing before heading back home?" Applejack asked her friend. "Yeah. It's still a bit sore," came Rainbow Dash's reply. "Still sorry about that," Applejack said with a apologetic look on her face. "Don't worry, It'll pass in no time, I can tell," Rainbow said confidently. "You wanna use the bathtub? Might help it get better faster." "Yeah, thanks," Rainbow said and considered something for a moment. "You're gonna freshen up too, right? We could save some water if we do it together." "Yeah. I'm assuming you wanna roll in the hay while we're at it?" Applejack asked. Rainbow rolled her eyes. "Well, duh!" she said and planted a kiss on Applejack's muzzle. - Ponyville was not a cultural or economic center. So the population of Ponyville considered themselves very fortunate to house such a sophisticated establishment as the town's spa. Aloe and Vera were attending two of their regulars, Fluttershy and Rarity. Rarity had been talking animatedly about a grand opportunity in her career as a dress maker for quite some time when they approached the part of the spa routine when the four would usually go to a quiet room for the highlight of their physical satisfaction program. But Rarity had been talking non-stop the entire time and did not look like she was going to stop anytime soon. The sweet Fluttershy listened interestedly to Rarity and her babbling the entire time. Aloe and Vera looked at each other. Do they keep going like normal or do they interrupt the endless verbal stream to ask for conformation? After consulting wordlessly with only looks for a few second they decided to keep going like normal. Surely their attendees would complain if they were doing anything inappropriate? Rarity talked through her pleasure-induced moans and barely let her gasps interrupt her for even a moment. Fluttershy had to use her moans to indicate that she was still listening. After the whole affair Aloe and Vera were convinced that they had done everything right. This was confirmed when Rarity entered mere seconds after leaving for another round. Xenophilia: Et In Equestria EgoLuna once again strode through the dreamscape, and once again she beheld the source of her vexation. Bellerophon, the human, walked on. Time and again, Luna had tried to discern the meaning of this place, and time and again, she had failed. She was nothing if not persistent, however, one does not live through thousands of years without learning patience after all. And so she continued. "Lero!" she called out to the distant form. Always, he failed to notice her. Always, he kept walking away, the laws of time and space seemingly being incompatible for the two forms. She tried following him, as she had many times, but the strong beats of her wings were never adequate to match Lero's calm gait. "Lero, hear me!" Luna called out, and then, something unprecedented happened. The distant form stopped and turned around. Time and distance did not hold the same meaning in this place as the waking world, Luna could not tell how many leagues away Bellerophon was, but she could still see him clearly in the great distance. Bellerophon looked at Luna with impassive eyes. She took some comfort in that his form looked healthy and sound. In fact, Lero looked almost impossibly tranquil, with a small smile on his lips. It was clear to her that communicating with this human in the dream-world would not be as simple as with her little ponies. Luna decided that coyness and pleasantries would have little meaning in this place. She was here with a purpose. "I am here to learn about you, my dear human," she stated clearly. Lero slowly closed his eyes and calmly nodded once in recognition. "Will you sate my curiosity?" Lero slowly shook his head, his calm demeanor never changing. Luna frowned, but she did not sense any malice or even mischief from the human. "You will not allow it or you cannot?" Luna asked. Lero's head dipped slowly, but his expression still did not change. Luna thought for a moment, this had never happened before, and she would not throw this opportunity away. "If you cannot, then who can?" Lero slowly raised his hand and very gently touched Luna's forehead with a finger. Luna was jerked back into the physical world with a great start. The sensation had been alarming, but not unpleasant. Forgotten lore from forgotten beings. How does one reach the twilight between awareness and forgetfulness? She thought about this for only a short time before realization suddenly hit her. Of course! — Berry Punch kept waiting. Anypony else in her situation would assume that they had been forgotten by whoever had requested to meet her. But Berry Punch's mind worked in strange ways. Ponies often assumed that she was completely irrational, while those who knew her knew that she wasn't always true, but still couldn't tell when she was and when she was not. She allowed others the same indulgence. So she kept waiting patiently, and after a while, a dark-coated unicorn approached her. "Still here, your majesty. Or do I not call you that?" "Indeed. For the moment, I am Silver Shine. I thank you for your patience," Princess Luna said. "I get the feeling that it's not because you don't want to be associated with somepony as crass as myself," Berry said. "That is true, but for now, please pretend that it was so." Berry finally looked at the princess, it was a long look, full of the kind of contemplations that normal ponies do not let themselves have. "You mean pretend that you would want to go somewhere where we wouldn't get the stink-eye?" "Yes,” Luna said with a strange form of approval in her voice. “Where would that be?" Berry Punch had never been to Los Pegasus before, but she took a moment and looked around her. "That way," she said after a while, and pointed in a seemingly random direction with a small measure of conviction. "Excellent," the disguised Princess Luna said as they started walking down where Berry Punch had pointed. — They had been walking for some time through the city when they Luna had felt something. It was a short while after they had passed the marina into the older residential-areas. It was somewhere here, perhaps not what she was looking for, but somewhere that led to it. Until recently, Luna had had very little to indicate whether there had been any purpose to this whole enterprise or not, but she knew not to ask Berry Punch questions as they made their way through the city. This was very subtle magic, the kind that took a lot of commitment to even get a vague sense of its workings. But now it seemed that they might be on the right track, even though that was a phrase that didn’t fit the situation at all. After Berry had said that they were in a good spot, they had settled down on a bench and Luna had started looking around carefully in the fading daylight. My little ponies' cities are clean and pleasant, Luna thought as she carefully scanned their surroundings. But there’s an aberration. Neglect, disrepair, filth, it should be here somewhere. Then she spotted it. An alleyway between an old pool-hall and a storage shed. The signs were faded, the stone had cracks and the windows in the alley were old and grimy, with a few panes missing. The alley was ignored by all passersby. Luna, still in her disguise, wordlessly got up from the bench and calmly walked down the seemingly empty alley, Berry Punch followed. The further they walked, the more muted the sounds of the city behind them became. The shapes of the houses were becoming uneven, perhaps even a bit uncanny. Soon they reached a small crossroad. "Wait here," she told Berry, making sure that the way they came out of was still in sight, the ponies who ignored the alley still visible in the distance. Berry Punch hadn’t said anything for some time now, she stood there with a expression of unease as Luna peered around the corner. Uneven, almost abandoned old streets stretched into the distance, old newspapers held in place by small trickles of water from rusty old drain pipes. Steam or fog obscured much of both the sights and sounds. The occasional shape hurried across the street in the distance and the windows were all dark with the occasional hint of an onlooker. Luna turned to Berry. "Thank you for your help, Miss Berry Punch. Now please, go back, I will watch over you." Berry gave a small nod and walked back they way they came. After she reached the streets of the normal world, she gave Luna one last worried look, and then walked away. Now then, Luna thought to herself. Let us see if there indeed are any answers to be found in this... place. Not carrying herself with confidence she hadn’t earned, Luna cautiously walked down the street, the ground, the buildings, the refuse, even the air feeling forlorn, twisted… wrong. — Celestia lowered the sun, then did something she’d hoped she would never be forced to do again: she raised the moon. For a thousand years her sister had been locked away in the form of that foul being, and now she was alone again, as Luna's inquiries would right now require her to be absent from the castle, and indeed the world, in a way. At least this time, Celestia would have her sister back soon. At least she hoped so. — Luna opened the decayed wooden door, and slowly descended the damp, stone stairs. The establishment at the bottom was dimly lit and worn. The guests were talking quietly amongst themselves, playing cards, nursing their drinks, and reading newspapers. There was no direct reaction to her entering, but she still felt watched as she made her way over to the bar through the thick, smoke-filled air. She looked around and saw that the patrons looked mostly fine, but a few details stuck out if one inspected them long enough. A few worryingly sunken eyes, odd and strangely old-looking wounds, and a few bloodstains on jackets and old travel-cloaks. Luna inspected the menu as the bartender approached her. A strangely impressive collection of beverages were available at about half the normal price, and a few that didn't last all that long, so they were supplied from somewhere. As the bartender looked at her questioningly, Luna said, "I'm looking for someone, with one eye, someone solitary who leaves shortly before midnight." The bartender wordlessly gestured towards a table in the back. Luna turned to see and saw a lone figure sitting by an old wooden table. She slowly approached it. In the world of Equestria, Princess Luna was a guardian of an entire realm, and had power enough to enforce the protection of her subjects. In this place and in this presence, however, she felt smaller and more powerless than she had in a long time. The figure at the table was imposing, majestically so, wearing a wide-brimmed hat and covered by a great, plain cloak. A filmy membrane covered one of the eyes. Luna could not hold back her curiosity and peered through the veils of the world to try and get a better understanding of what exactly it was that she had approached. She recoiled and just barely held back a cry of shock. She had not managed to discern what was in front of her, but she had seen two great, black birds on the figure's shoulders. She took the last few steps even more carefully than before. The figure observed her in silence beneath the brim of the hat. Luna took heart and spoke up. "I am under the impression that you can help me." The figure kept observing her as it nursed a beer, and it was impossible to tell if her statement had been acknowledged. She tried again. "I have questions about Bellerophon the human." The figure slowly gestured for her to sit down, but otherwise did nothing. Luna did so and assumed, and hoped, that her presence was not unwelcome. "Do you know of Bellerophon?" "Yes," the figure answered in a calm, low, and masculine voice. "Who are you?" Luna asked, her voice void of accusation of passion.. "I am the Decreer," the figure answered patiently. “And how do you know about this visitor among my subjects?” "I know of Bellerophon and his kind, for through much of what you know as time, I have walked among them through the Lands of Lies." "And what is that place?" Luna asked. "The Elysian Fields," the Decreer answered. "Their sanctuary and prison ever since the Sinfall. Erected by the Usurper and false creator." "And what is the ‘Sinfall’?" Luna asked, despite starting to feel light-headed. "The great Deceit. The imprisonment of Anthropos." "Lero is a prisoner?" "A prisoner of time, matter, and flesh." Luna shook her head, she was starting to feel dizzy and could not stay here for long, and needed answers to important questions. "Is Lero powerful?" "He is Anthropos," the Decreer answered cryptically. "Is he dangerous?" "If he so chooses." Trying to think hard, Luna tried another tactic. "What would the involvement between Lero and my subjects mean for their safety? And please, answer clearly," Luna pleaded. The figure paused for a moment at this before leaning forward and for the first time really looked at Luna with a piercing gaze from his eye, then leaned back in his chair and took a sip from his drink before answering. "The Last Cycle approaches. Should Anthropos awake, her friends will be shielded from all the darkness in the cosmos, everywhere, and for all time. Her old tormentors... might find themselves beneath her notice,” he said, then seemed to consider something for a moment before continuing. “Or not," he concluded simply. “What will happen if I talk of this with Lero?” Luna asked. “You will bring him pain.” That would have to do, Luna shook her head in frustration before rising up. "Thank you for your time," she said. The figure gave her a small but still respectful nod. "Take care, mistress of moonlight, your presence and what you still possess breeds envy in this place," the figure said and gestured towards the rest of the establishment. Luna noticed that the slight buzz had died of and all eyes were hungrily locked on her. A subtle but deep fear crawled up her spine like an impossibly deep rumble. Then the figure on the other side of the table turned his head towards the room at large and its patrons. As he did, the figures looked away and once again went back to their drinks and talks. Luna gave the Decreer a grateful nod and walked across the room, up the stairs, and out the door into the night. She kept walking, through the alley and out on a street down towards the marina, still in her unicorn-disguise. Close by, a night-open restaurant's patio-section held several happily laughing groups of ponies. There, in the comforting radiance of merriment, she leaned against a streetlamp and let her composure drop. She shivered at her experience and the relief of its ending. She breathed deep for a few moments before gathering up the strength needed for the final stretch. She reached her royal chariot, ignored the worried looks her guards gave her and simply said, "Canterlot. Post-haste." Her guards obeyed immediately, and Luna leaned back in her seat. Before long, she would be home, and she could not reach her sister's comforting presence soon enough. Solder In EquestriaIt once came to pass, that a previously unknown creature arrived in Equestria by pure chance. An alien, with alien ways of thinking, knowledge about alien technology, who brought alien tools with him. After some initial confusion and alarm, the ponies of Equestria was delighted to learn that the creature, a 'human', was quite friendly. However, he missed his home, and the pony-princesses agreed to help him find a way back. They would all be sad to see him go, and he promised that he would return to visit if he could. He also decided to repay their kindness with teaching them about his trade with his alien tools. And so, while he was waiting for the spell to send him back home to ready, he was teaching the knowledge-craving young princess, Twilight Sparkle, as they were sitting around a table in Canterlot Castle. "Put some at the tip of the iron, then heat up the pin," the human said patiently. Twilight groaned in frustration as the alien device once again seemed to do everything except what she wanted. "Don't wait too long, or you're gonna boil the flux," the human continued. Sunset Shimmer Fucks A HorseSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Pinkie SensesSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.MLAABQ Gaiden: Magical ExpertiseSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.MLAABQ Gaiden: A Most Unexpected Avenue Of AttackSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.The Tale That Set Everything RightSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Fifty Thousand Zebras With Vuvuzelas Visit CanterlotSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.MLAABQ Gaiden: Celestia's Morning GreetingSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.MLAABQ Gaiden: Going Hump In The NightSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.MLAABQ Gaiden: Sweet And Unusual Punishment part oneSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.MLAABQ Gaiden: Sweet And Unusual Punishment part twoSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.MLAABQ Gaiden: Temporal DisplacementSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.MLAABQ Gaiden: Roll For InitiativeSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Story DEMO: Dash Tries To Light Your FartSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.MLAABQ Gaiden: Sharing CultureSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Story DEMO: Humans Are CRAZY!Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Twilight Is An Alicorn Who Outlived All Her FriendsSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.MLAABQ Gaiden: Reverse-Toothfairy-Batman-ProsthetistSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.MLAABQ Gaiden: She Came In From Another DirectionSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Snakeskin Ducttape's Alpha Centaur: Alien CrossfireSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.MLAABQ Gaiden: Lingual HindrancesSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.MLAABQ Gaiden: Gabe and Armor Arrives EarlySomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Story Demo: Sunset Shimmer Ends Up At HogwartsSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.MLAABQ Gaiden: A Pop Culture ReferencePrincess Luna landed outside the entrance to the mines 'belonging' to the Diamond Dog pack currently situated in the outskirts of the Everfree Forest, and walked down into the mines with determined steps. These days she was often glad that her sister held the supreme executive power in Equestria. A thousand year stint on the moon hadn't done as much to quench Luna's impulsive side as one might think. Of course her sister was right, their new friend from Terra, Gabrielle Desrochers, had been abducted by this pack, but it would seem like the rogue action of one thoughtless individual. The pack as a whole shouldn't be punished. Still, she couldn't quite mask the anger on her face. The Dogs yelped and scurried out of her way as she made her way through the dark halls with determined steps. She reached the Alpha's chamber and opened the door without invitation. The alpha was discussing something with a pair of Diamond Dog mares. She stopped herself from simply barking the demand for an explanation, and instead addressed the mares in the correct ways that Diamond Dog mares should be addressed, but in a way that brooked no argument. This was between her and the Alpha. "Bitches, leave!" Pony People With Pony NamesNEW author's notes, now with color! So, like, the original is the one at the bottom, which it seems like Orbiting Kettle likes (thanks, man ). Then he thought it could benefit from some polish, which if you'll read it, you'll find out is the case. However, since this story was a bit of a time-trial for me, I thought I might as well keep my old little one-shot, and include Kettle's new suggestion So, Orbiting Kettle new and improved version of Pony People With Pony Names (and I hope my over-clarification doesn't come across as sarcasm, I just haven't had anyone building on something I've written before, this is actually really exciting ): Tommy Gun leaned back in his chair with a satisfied grin. His grand plan was still going on despite the traitors and backstabbers that had been hiding among his own ponies. But that was the past. His new second had cleaned up the shop, brought the grunts back on track and was leading the pigs on a merry chase far away form the Westside Laundry business. He had to admit it, that stallion had an uncanny skill in staying always one step ahead of the cops and ratting out turncoats. Tommy Gun grabbed a cigar and lighted it, a smug grin as skewed as his tax-forms on his muzzle. Hiring Sting Operation has been the best thing he had ever done. That's was Kettle's improved version, here's my intentionally rushed original: In a mansion overlooking an old suburb of Manehatten, Tommygun leaned back in his chair. Everything was going according to plan. His operations had taken a hit after the ousting of several traitors among his old guard. But the pigs had been running around like clueless foals after he placed his new wiseguy in charge of several operations, the same stallion who had busted the aforementioned traitors. In just a few months, he had managed to fool the cops away from the money laundering on westside completely. With any luck, his recent losses would be recuperated and then some. Yeah, Tommygun thought with satisfaction, that stallion, Sting Operation, has an uncanny ability to stay ahead of the law. He was the best damn enforcer he had ever hired. MLAABQ Gaiden: Sing Me A SongIt was the day after the big movie-night with almost all her new friends, when Gabe was walking across a field in the outskirts of Ponyville, enjoying the pleasant weather, when a sound caught her ear. Aiming her ears forward, and looking up, she spotted Rainbow Dash’s house, and heard Rainbow Dash’s voice faintly sounding from it. “Dun-Dun-Dun-Dun-Dun-Dun-Dun-Dun-Dun-Dun-Dun-Dun-Dun-Dun-Dun-Dun-DASH! A-AAAAAH! Savior of Equestria! Dun-Dun-Dun-Dun-Dun-Dun-Dun-Dun-Dun.” At this point, Gabe had bitten down on her hoof, trying desperately to stifle her laughter, lest Rainbow heard her. After about half a minute, she had to start stumbling away from the house, her teeth still clutching a hoof as her ears automatically splayed back to catch Rainbow’s raspy words. “... She’ll save, with her mighty wings- all the mares, all the stallions, all the things- yeah the mighty Dash!"
An Unannounced VisitorSeen from the sky, the district would have looked almost completely square. At the center of the city were the office-buildings and expensive restaurants. Moving northeast from there, you’d first pass through residential areas of varying status and quality, then to warehouses and businesses, hardware stores and car-dealers. After that, you’d reach the medium-and-light industry-sector of the city. There, in the early hours of the day, the broad, heavy traffic-accommodating streets were overflowing with people going to work, leaving entire suburbs almost empty during work-hours. Then, nine hours later, the reverse happened. The streets of the small & medium-industry-sector were filled, and then emptied as the blue-collars and small business-owners went home to where society stored them between work-days. It wasn’t an unusual sight to see stray cars and people after this, though. Most people who spent their days here knew what workaholics the owners of smaller business could be. One of these not-unusual sights would be a woman stepping out of a car. What was unusual about this was her striking appearance in this bleak autumn afternoon. Celestia’s gaze slowly travelled over the mostly-still surroundings, the somewhat sombre feel of the place being compounded by the grey sky, leaf-covered ground still wet from recent rain, and the dull sounds of car-tires on asphalt in the distance. After consulting a note on her hand, Celestia walked up the asphalt-ramp between somewhat wild-grown bushes and birch trees, the effort of making an industrial-zone more aesthetically appealing not working as intended at this time of year. It was a building of corrugated steel and reinforced windows. Heavy doors to accommodate the shipping of heavy equipment were placed next to a modest reception-entrance. The windows were caked with grime which seemingly obscured only darkness, the little of the interior which could be seen from the outside being dusty workbenches with worn tools and forgotten binders. Celestia’s steps took her through a trail in the birch-leaves clearly made by a motorcycle. The leaves, she noted, seemed to have been accumulated for several years. The door would held in place by a steel chain, twined several times around the large push-plate in black plastic, and one of the stout metal supports for the small roof sticking out from the building, which she was currently loitering beneath. It offered no hindrance to anyone anymore, though, one of the links having been severed and the chain hung beside the door. She was entering uninvited, but not discreetly, as she did not come here to harm or steal. A few knickknacks and small pieces of junk, obviously from the factory-floor, were disturbed by the door as she pushed it open. Inside, she was first met with a mess. The mat in the short hallway was absolutely filthy from use. Celestia had been certain she was in the right place before, but seeing the tire-tracks in the grime confirmed it. Sunset Shimmer lived in this place. Beside the carpeting, the corridor Celestia found herself in only contained an umbrella-stand and a small, plastic palm-tree. As she took a few steps into the gloom, a sliver of trepidation crept into her chest at what she saw. The umbrellas in the stand obscured a baseball-bat, and the pot hid a hammer. Celestia looked at them, hints of worry and contemplation playing across her face. After noting that they were dry and somewhat clean, she pushed on. A small, uninteresting, and almost empty office was to her left. She ignored it and walked on to where the left wall ended, opening up into the factory-floor, with some doors on her right. The weak, grey light of a cloudy autumn afternoon was the only source of illumination, almost making the scene resemble a cave of monsters from some fantasy-story or other, but all was still and quiet Celestia spotted a switch on the wall. Pressing it did nothing for a few seconds, until the fixtures hanging from the ceiling came to life, one by one. At least the survivors of seemingly long neglect did. Celestia slumped slightly and let out a sigh. Sunset Shimmer had access to electricity, though that also have meant that one of her students might have had messed around with industrial-grade circuit-breakers. Large parts of the factory floor were bare, though none of it was clean. Layers of dust covered everything from the fixtures hanging from the ceiling to the cold concrete floor, though some of the shelves seemed more like it was cocooned by it. A few areas were taken up by workbenches and tool-racks, mostly empty. A few worn hammers and pliers could be found here and there, but it was mostly junk and scrap, broken desk-lamps, pieces of plastic tags, and such, with a few scorch-marks around a rusty soldering-station. Metal shavings littered the floor around an empty stand, hinting at what type of machine had once stood there, and the large shelves found alongside two of the walls were completely bare of anything but dust. Celestia took it all in with with an almost impatient look, then walked back to the light.switch and the unexplored rooms. If there ever was anything of value here, it was long gone now. The few things that remained wouldn’t give enough scrap-money for a single meal. The only thing that stood out was a part of the wall beside the light switch, where an area the size of a textbook looked fresher and covered in newer dust. Celestia eyed it with mild curiosity before dismissing it and turning off the light. One of the doors led to a changing-room, with a toilet and a roomy shower area. Celestia was lucky that she was advancing as slowly and methodically as she did, or she might have tripped when her foot touched the large, thick plank nailed to the floor. She eyed the plank with curiosity before she noticed the longer plank leaning against the wall beside her, perfect in length to jam the door she had just entered through. Switching on the light, she almost let out a small gasp at the sight, before she dismissed the fear with the help of reality. A clothing rack and hat shelf-combo took up the long wall to the side of the door, where more than a dozen black garbage bags hung in a row, at first seeming like they could accommodate humans. Celestia softly pulled at the edge of one of them, revealing only clothes in Sunset Shimmer’s size. Opening the door into the shower-area, Celestia’s eyes narrowed slightly at another strange and somewhat uncanny sight. On the tile-floor of the showers stood a faded, plastic patio-chair, together with a large numbers of PET bottles, a foot-bath tub, and a pair of kitchen-pots. Shower-supplies stood underneath the same shower-head that the chair stood under, and the area directly around it was scrubbed relatively clean, standing out starkly against the surrounding tiles brown with chalk, soap-residues, and the occasional trace of mold. The bathroom revealed nothing out of the ordinary. Only a single toothbrush and tube of toothpaste. Celestia set the tap to lukewarm and opened the flow of water. After twenty seconds, she felt certain that this place provided nothing but ice-cold, though thankfully clean, water. Celestia walked out of the restroom-area and into what was apparently a break-room with a kitchenette. There, another collection of PET bottles and pots on the stove provided Celestia with a significant clue as to the purpose of the out-of-place objects in the shower. A small amount of dishes were drying on a rack beside the sink, the cupboards revealing only a few more plates, bowls, and other kitchen-utensils, together with a few tin cans of fruit. The table was empty, except for a few crumbs on the cloth beside a toaster. A slight hum came from one of the fridges, that one containing some cartons of milk, some butter and little else. The silent one containing only cheap cereals and half a loaf of bread. Celestia moved to the final and largest room, not counting the factory floor. This one was in the best shape, though it took a few moments to discern this, as the lights in the ceiling were missing, and the windows were covered up. Moving forward to the desk, Celestia turned on the lamp sitting on top of it, and let out a small cry of shock when she processed what rested on the bookshelf behind the desk, the first sound she could not hold in for this little investigation. Her short-lived confusion about the bare area on the wall in the factory-floor had been answered. In the bookshelf laid a pair of first aid-kits. The supplies of one of them were half-depleted. Celestia closed her eyes, and let out a long sigh before continuing. The windows were covered mostly by old newspapers, duct tape, and pieces of curtains. The desk-drawers and bookshelves revealed a number of textbooks on her school’s curriculum, a number of book advanced beyond that, as well as a somewhat battered laptop. At the far end of the room was an old couch with a floor-lamp next to it. The light from the desk didn’t reach that far, and the gloom hinted only of a shape lying prone on it. Celestia walked softly towards the couch, but stopped when the light revealed a pair of empty tin cans hanging from the ceiling in a hook, connected by a fishing-line going out into the doorway. Celestia frowned, continued towards the couch, and turned on the lamp. A makeshift bedding covered the couch. Stale newspapers lay on top of a pair of banners that had gone missing from a school sporting-event last year. Celestia cautiously reached out a hand and peeled away the makeshift cover, revealing only more cloth. A torn off office chair-cushion in a pillowcase and one of the couch’s backrests made up the place to rest the head, while a duvet made up the base of the bedding, and an old trench-coat presumably provided some additional warmth. In the stillness, Celestia had tuned out the faint, ambient sound of cars travelling in the distance. That all stopped when she heard a clear sound coming from the glass door she had first entered through, and she whipped up her head to better make out the almost-minute sound. The sound suddenly stopped halfway, and Celestia hesitated. Unless Sunset had seen Celestia’s non-salient car, and only now registered it as hers, Celestia could not see what would give Sunset pause. No light spilled out from the windows, and she had disturbed nothing. The sound of the door closing, and steps moving away from the door, told her that Sunset was more clever, and more paranoid, than Celestia gave her credit for. As the steps suddenly became slower and heavier, and Celestia suddenly remembered the debris she had disturbed with the door on her way in. She peeled away some of the paper covering the window, it too being reinforced, to see Sunset Shimmer jumping on her motorcycle mid-run, and driving around the corner. Celestia hurried out of Sunset’s ‘bedroom’, out of the building, through the tracks in the leaves, and onto the road, only to see a black-clad figure with a hint of fiery red hair beneath her helmet speeding away into the distance.
One, Single Joke That's taken From The InternetApplejack was taking a break from her farm work and was leaning against the fence that surrounded Sweet Apple Acres, while conversing with Fluttershy who had brought her some refreshments as repayment for Applejack's help in repairing Fluttershy's chicken-coop. A few of Fluttershy's animal-friends had joined her in her little stroll to Sweet Apple Acres, passing by the neighboring apiary. Fluttershy suddenly turned away from Applejack and softly called out to one of her friends who had approached the apiary's honeycombs. "Now, now, Mr Badger, that honey's not yours." Her friend stopped mid track just steps away from the honeycombs and turned back, sauntering towards the two ponies as he was assaulted by hundreds of bees. Applejack's eyes went wide as Mr Badger was stung dozens of times during his casual stroll towards them. "Doesn't that bother him none?" she asked. "Oh, no" Fluttershy said in her normal soft voice and slowly shook her head. "Honey Badger doesn't care. Honey Badger doesn't give a shit."
Equestria, The Land Of Free Love. Vol 1Twilight Sparkle was a scholar. Applejack was a farmer. The two ponies relied on vastly different amounts of food-intake. When Applejack first met Twilight about an hour ago she could tell that Twilight's strength was not in physical prowess. She had first assumed that the visitor was some sort of clerk, but Twilight had later clarified that she was Princess Celestia's personal protegé. Either way it explained Twilight's city-slicker behavior to the farm pony. On the issue of the amount of food they craved, Applejack was at first a bit worried about Twilight's eating habits. She was getting full very early and still seemed to hurry for some reason. Twilight for her part felt that she had made a mistake in treating this hearty meal the way she usually treated meals, as an unfortunately necessary distraction away from her scholarly pursuits. And so with her tummy having protested loudly on and off for the last fifteen minutes she was surprised when Applejack, who was sitting next to her, asked "Getting a bit full there, miss Sparkle? Would you like another kind of pie?" Twilight raised her eyebrow's at the farm pony. "More pie? Ugh no thank you, Applejack, my stomach can't take anymore." Applejack chuckled. "I wasn't talking about the kind of pie you swallow, sugarcube. I think you might like this one. It helps you relax, and that helps your digestion." "What do you mean?" Twilight asked, completely oblivious at what Applejack was insinuating. Applejack chuckled again and rose slightly from her seat. "You must have a different way of talking over there in Canterlot," she said and gestured to her rear which she jiggled as Twilight looked. "I'm talking about my pie." Should any individual from a vastly different culture have been sitting at the table at that instance, they might have been more than a little surprised at the conversation so far, especially how utterly unabashed everypony involved was and how uninterested everypony within earshot was. But this was only the beginning. "Oh," Twilight said. "Yeah, sure, when?" "Well, you said that you were in a bit of a hurry so don't worry. We can do it fast," Applejack said. "That's considerate of you," Twilight said and turned to her other side. "Spike? Will you be okay alone for a little while." Spike, who was involved in a very pleasant discussion with Applejack's younger sister, simply waved his claw and without looking back. "Alright," Twilight said. "Lead the way." Applejack started walking away from the big outdoor-table towards the farmhouse. "Let's do it indoors, it's a busy day here and we don't want to get in anypony's way." Twilight thought this sounded reasonable. They entered the farm house, went into Applejack's room and had a wonderful time together. Applejack was right, her pie certainly helped Twilight feel all better, but Twilight doesn't always learn from her mistakes and once more overindulged quite a bit. - It was looking bleak for quite a while there but the night was shaping up to be quite wonderful. Twilight was experiencing her first slumber part with two very good friends. "So... who's up for another slumber party tomorrow night?" Twilight asked. The resulting, good-humored barrage of pillows she got in her face told her that both of her friends thought it best to do so another time. And Twilight's offer of postponing the event was met with more laughter and pillows. Twilight would never be upset with her friends for something as simple as declining a slumber party, but it was clear that her friends wouldn't budge and she decided that they had to make the best of the event. "Oh! I almost forgot since the book neglected to mention it! Do you two want to have sex?" Twilight asked. Realization dawned on Rarity's face. "Of course, darling. You didn't ask and I was starting to think that I did something wrong last time." "Oh! No no!" Twilight said. "I just assumed that it would be covered later in the book and forgot when the whole thing with the tree branch happened. So how about it?" "Well sure we do!" Applejack said. "We were mighty tempted to have a go at each other earlier but we didn't want to keep you up." "That's a relief," Twilight said. "I was starting to think you didn't want to do it with each other." Rarity gasped and put her hoof to her barrel dramatically. "Not making love to Applejack? Banish the thought, darling! It's such a pleasant way to solve frustrations concerning her." Applejack turned to Rarity with a smug look on her face. "Right back at you, sugarcube. I haven't had an argument with you in forever, I was starting to miss this." "Then I shall have to make something absolutely outrageous sometime soon," Rarity said and shot Applejack a sultry look. Twilight considered this for a moment. "I wonder if that could be another letter for the princess sometime," she said ."Alright then, let's go." The trio trotted up the stairs and did what friends in Equestria does best. The more the merrier. - Applejack and Rainbow Dash had finally finished with their work after the Running of The Leaves and were heading to the Apple-family farm. "You wanna rest up your wing before heading back home?" Applejack asked her friend. "Yeah. It's still a bit sore," came Rainbow Dash's reply. "Still sorry about that," Applejack said with a apologetic look on her face. "Don't worry, It'll pass in no time, I can tell," Rainbow said confidently. "You wanna use the bathtub? Might help it get better faster." "Yeah, thanks," Rainbow said and considered something for a moment. "You're gonna freshen up too, right? We could save some water if we do it together." "Yeah. I'm assuming you wanna roll in the hay while we're at it?" Applejack asked. Rainbow rolled her eyes. "Well, duh!" she said and planted a kiss on Applejack's muzzle. - Ponyville was not a cultural or economic center. So the population of Ponyville considered themselves very fortunate to house such a sophisticated establishment as the town's spa. Aloe and Vera were attending two of their regulars, Fluttershy and Rarity. Rarity had been talking animatedly about a grand opportunity in her career as a dress maker for quite some time when they approached the part of the spa routine when the four would usually go to a quiet room for the highlight of their physical satisfaction program. But Rarity had been talking non-stop the entire time and did not look like she was going to stop anytime soon. The sweet Fluttershy listened interestedly to Rarity and her babbling the entire time. Aloe and Vera looked at each other. Do they keep going like normal or do they interrupt the endless verbal stream to ask for conformation? After consulting wordlessly with only looks for a few second they decided to keep going like normal. Surely their attendees would complain if they were doing anything inappropriate? Rarity talked through her pleasure-induced moans and barely let her gasps interrupt her for even a moment. Fluttershy had to use her moans to indicate that she was still listening. After the whole affair Aloe and Vera were convinced that they had done everything right. This was confirmed when Rarity entered mere seconds after leaving for another round.
Xenophilia: Et In Equestria EgoLuna once again strode through the dreamscape, and once again she beheld the source of her vexation. Bellerophon, the human, walked on. Time and again, Luna had tried to discern the meaning of this place, and time and again, she had failed. She was nothing if not persistent, however, one does not live through thousands of years without learning patience after all. And so she continued. "Lero!" she called out to the distant form. Always, he failed to notice her. Always, he kept walking away, the laws of time and space seemingly being incompatible for the two forms. She tried following him, as she had many times, but the strong beats of her wings were never adequate to match Lero's calm gait. "Lero, hear me!" Luna called out, and then, something unprecedented happened. The distant form stopped and turned around. Time and distance did not hold the same meaning in this place as the waking world, Luna could not tell how many leagues away Bellerophon was, but she could still see him clearly in the great distance. Bellerophon looked at Luna with impassive eyes. She took some comfort in that his form looked healthy and sound. In fact, Lero looked almost impossibly tranquil, with a small smile on his lips. It was clear to her that communicating with this human in the dream-world would not be as simple as with her little ponies. Luna decided that coyness and pleasantries would have little meaning in this place. She was here with a purpose. "I am here to learn about you, my dear human," she stated clearly. Lero slowly closed his eyes and calmly nodded once in recognition. "Will you sate my curiosity?" Lero slowly shook his head, his calm demeanor never changing. Luna frowned, but she did not sense any malice or even mischief from the human. "You will not allow it or you cannot?" Luna asked. Lero's head dipped slowly, but his expression still did not change. Luna thought for a moment, this had never happened before, and she would not throw this opportunity away. "If you cannot, then who can?" Lero slowly raised his hand and very gently touched Luna's forehead with a finger. Luna was jerked back into the physical world with a great start. The sensation had been alarming, but not unpleasant. Forgotten lore from forgotten beings. How does one reach the twilight between awareness and forgetfulness? She thought about this for only a short time before realization suddenly hit her. Of course! — Berry Punch kept waiting. Anypony else in her situation would assume that they had been forgotten by whoever had requested to meet her. But Berry Punch's mind worked in strange ways. Ponies often assumed that she was completely irrational, while those who knew her knew that she wasn't always true, but still couldn't tell when she was and when she was not. She allowed others the same indulgence. So she kept waiting patiently, and after a while, a dark-coated unicorn approached her. "Still here, your majesty. Or do I not call you that?" "Indeed. For the moment, I am Silver Shine. I thank you for your patience," Princess Luna said. "I get the feeling that it's not because you don't want to be associated with somepony as crass as myself," Berry said. "That is true, but for now, please pretend that it was so." Berry finally looked at the princess, it was a long look, full of the kind of contemplations that normal ponies do not let themselves have. "You mean pretend that you would want to go somewhere where we wouldn't get the stink-eye?" "Yes,” Luna said with a strange form of approval in her voice. “Where would that be?" Berry Punch had never been to Los Pegasus before, but she took a moment and looked around her. "That way," she said after a while, and pointed in a seemingly random direction with a small measure of conviction. "Excellent," the disguised Princess Luna said as they started walking down where Berry Punch had pointed. — They had been walking for some time through the city when they Luna had felt something. It was a short while after they had passed the marina into the older residential-areas. It was somewhere here, perhaps not what she was looking for, but somewhere that led to it. Until recently, Luna had had very little to indicate whether there had been any purpose to this whole enterprise or not, but she knew not to ask Berry Punch questions as they made their way through the city. This was very subtle magic, the kind that took a lot of commitment to even get a vague sense of its workings. But now it seemed that they might be on the right track, even though that was a phrase that didn’t fit the situation at all. After Berry had said that they were in a good spot, they had settled down on a bench and Luna had started looking around carefully in the fading daylight. My little ponies' cities are clean and pleasant, Luna thought as she carefully scanned their surroundings. But there’s an aberration. Neglect, disrepair, filth, it should be here somewhere. Then she spotted it. An alleyway between an old pool-hall and a storage shed. The signs were faded, the stone had cracks and the windows in the alley were old and grimy, with a few panes missing. The alley was ignored by all passersby. Luna, still in her disguise, wordlessly got up from the bench and calmly walked down the seemingly empty alley, Berry Punch followed. The further they walked, the more muted the sounds of the city behind them became. The shapes of the houses were becoming uneven, perhaps even a bit uncanny. Soon they reached a small crossroad. "Wait here," she told Berry, making sure that the way they came out of was still in sight, the ponies who ignored the alley still visible in the distance. Berry Punch hadn’t said anything for some time now, she stood there with a expression of unease as Luna peered around the corner. Uneven, almost abandoned old streets stretched into the distance, old newspapers held in place by small trickles of water from rusty old drain pipes. Steam or fog obscured much of both the sights and sounds. The occasional shape hurried across the street in the distance and the windows were all dark with the occasional hint of an onlooker. Luna turned to Berry. "Thank you for your help, Miss Berry Punch. Now please, go back, I will watch over you." Berry gave a small nod and walked back they way they came. After she reached the streets of the normal world, she gave Luna one last worried look, and then walked away. Now then, Luna thought to herself. Let us see if there indeed are any answers to be found in this... place. Not carrying herself with confidence she hadn’t earned, Luna cautiously walked down the street, the ground, the buildings, the refuse, even the air feeling forlorn, twisted… wrong. — Celestia lowered the sun, then did something she’d hoped she would never be forced to do again: she raised the moon. For a thousand years her sister had been locked away in the form of that foul being, and now she was alone again, as Luna's inquiries would right now require her to be absent from the castle, and indeed the world, in a way. At least this time, Celestia would have her sister back soon. At least she hoped so. — Luna opened the decayed wooden door, and slowly descended the damp, stone stairs. The establishment at the bottom was dimly lit and worn. The guests were talking quietly amongst themselves, playing cards, nursing their drinks, and reading newspapers. There was no direct reaction to her entering, but she still felt watched as she made her way over to the bar through the thick, smoke-filled air. She looked around and saw that the patrons looked mostly fine, but a few details stuck out if one inspected them long enough. A few worryingly sunken eyes, odd and strangely old-looking wounds, and a few bloodstains on jackets and old travel-cloaks. Luna inspected the menu as the bartender approached her. A strangely impressive collection of beverages were available at about half the normal price, and a few that didn't last all that long, so they were supplied from somewhere. As the bartender looked at her questioningly, Luna said, "I'm looking for someone, with one eye, someone solitary who leaves shortly before midnight." The bartender wordlessly gestured towards a table in the back. Luna turned to see and saw a lone figure sitting by an old wooden table. She slowly approached it. In the world of Equestria, Princess Luna was a guardian of an entire realm, and had power enough to enforce the protection of her subjects. In this place and in this presence, however, she felt smaller and more powerless than she had in a long time. The figure at the table was imposing, majestically so, wearing a wide-brimmed hat and covered by a great, plain cloak. A filmy membrane covered one of the eyes. Luna could not hold back her curiosity and peered through the veils of the world to try and get a better understanding of what exactly it was that she had approached. She recoiled and just barely held back a cry of shock. She had not managed to discern what was in front of her, but she had seen two great, black birds on the figure's shoulders. She took the last few steps even more carefully than before. The figure observed her in silence beneath the brim of the hat. Luna took heart and spoke up. "I am under the impression that you can help me." The figure kept observing her as it nursed a beer, and it was impossible to tell if her statement had been acknowledged. She tried again. "I have questions about Bellerophon the human." The figure slowly gestured for her to sit down, but otherwise did nothing. Luna did so and assumed, and hoped, that her presence was not unwelcome. "Do you know of Bellerophon?" "Yes," the figure answered in a calm, low, and masculine voice. "Who are you?" Luna asked, her voice void of accusation of passion.. "I am the Decreer," the figure answered patiently. “And how do you know about this visitor among my subjects?” "I know of Bellerophon and his kind, for through much of what you know as time, I have walked among them through the Lands of Lies." "And what is that place?" Luna asked. "The Elysian Fields," the Decreer answered. "Their sanctuary and prison ever since the Sinfall. Erected by the Usurper and false creator." "And what is the ‘Sinfall’?" Luna asked, despite starting to feel light-headed. "The great Deceit. The imprisonment of Anthropos." "Lero is a prisoner?" "A prisoner of time, matter, and flesh." Luna shook her head, she was starting to feel dizzy and could not stay here for long, and needed answers to important questions. "Is Lero powerful?" "He is Anthropos," the Decreer answered cryptically. "Is he dangerous?" "If he so chooses." Trying to think hard, Luna tried another tactic. "What would the involvement between Lero and my subjects mean for their safety? And please, answer clearly," Luna pleaded. The figure paused for a moment at this before leaning forward and for the first time really looked at Luna with a piercing gaze from his eye, then leaned back in his chair and took a sip from his drink before answering. "The Last Cycle approaches. Should Anthropos awake, her friends will be shielded from all the darkness in the cosmos, everywhere, and for all time. Her old tormentors... might find themselves beneath her notice,” he said, then seemed to consider something for a moment before continuing. “Or not," he concluded simply. “What will happen if I talk of this with Lero?” Luna asked. “You will bring him pain.” That would have to do, Luna shook her head in frustration before rising up. "Thank you for your time," she said. The figure gave her a small but still respectful nod. "Take care, mistress of moonlight, your presence and what you still possess breeds envy in this place," the figure said and gestured towards the rest of the establishment. Luna noticed that the slight buzz had died of and all eyes were hungrily locked on her. A subtle but deep fear crawled up her spine like an impossibly deep rumble. Then the figure on the other side of the table turned his head towards the room at large and its patrons. As he did, the figures looked away and once again went back to their drinks and talks. Luna gave the Decreer a grateful nod and walked across the room, up the stairs, and out the door into the night. She kept walking, through the alley and out on a street down towards the marina, still in her unicorn-disguise. Close by, a night-open restaurant's patio-section held several happily laughing groups of ponies. There, in the comforting radiance of merriment, she leaned against a streetlamp and let her composure drop. She shivered at her experience and the relief of its ending. She breathed deep for a few moments before gathering up the strength needed for the final stretch. She reached her royal chariot, ignored the worried looks her guards gave her and simply said, "Canterlot. Post-haste." Her guards obeyed immediately, and Luna leaned back in her seat. Before long, she would be home, and she could not reach her sister's comforting presence soon enough.
Solder In EquestriaIt once came to pass, that a previously unknown creature arrived in Equestria by pure chance. An alien, with alien ways of thinking, knowledge about alien technology, who brought alien tools with him. After some initial confusion and alarm, the ponies of Equestria was delighted to learn that the creature, a 'human', was quite friendly. However, he missed his home, and the pony-princesses agreed to help him find a way back. They would all be sad to see him go, and he promised that he would return to visit if he could. He also decided to repay their kindness with teaching them about his trade with his alien tools. And so, while he was waiting for the spell to send him back home to ready, he was teaching the knowledge-craving young princess, Twilight Sparkle, as they were sitting around a table in Canterlot Castle. "Put some at the tip of the iron, then heat up the pin," the human said patiently. Twilight groaned in frustration as the alien device once again seemed to do everything except what she wanted. "Don't wait too long, or you're gonna boil the flux," the human continued.
Sunset Shimmer Fucks A HorseSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
MLAABQ Gaiden: Magical ExpertiseSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
MLAABQ Gaiden: A Most Unexpected Avenue Of AttackSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
The Tale That Set Everything RightSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Fifty Thousand Zebras With Vuvuzelas Visit CanterlotSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
MLAABQ Gaiden: Celestia's Morning GreetingSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
MLAABQ Gaiden: Going Hump In The NightSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
MLAABQ Gaiden: Sweet And Unusual Punishment part oneSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
MLAABQ Gaiden: Sweet And Unusual Punishment part twoSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
MLAABQ Gaiden: Temporal DisplacementSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
MLAABQ Gaiden: Roll For InitiativeSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Story DEMO: Dash Tries To Light Your FartSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
MLAABQ Gaiden: Sharing CultureSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Story DEMO: Humans Are CRAZY!Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Twilight Is An Alicorn Who Outlived All Her FriendsSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
MLAABQ Gaiden: Reverse-Toothfairy-Batman-ProsthetistSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
MLAABQ Gaiden: She Came In From Another DirectionSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Snakeskin Ducttape's Alpha Centaur: Alien CrossfireSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
MLAABQ Gaiden: Lingual HindrancesSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
MLAABQ Gaiden: Gabe and Armor Arrives EarlySomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
Story Demo: Sunset Shimmer Ends Up At HogwartsSomething has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.
MLAABQ Gaiden: A Pop Culture ReferencePrincess Luna landed outside the entrance to the mines 'belonging' to the Diamond Dog pack currently situated in the outskirts of the Everfree Forest, and walked down into the mines with determined steps. These days she was often glad that her sister held the supreme executive power in Equestria. A thousand year stint on the moon hadn't done as much to quench Luna's impulsive side as one might think. Of course her sister was right, their new friend from Terra, Gabrielle Desrochers, had been abducted by this pack, but it would seem like the rogue action of one thoughtless individual. The pack as a whole shouldn't be punished. Still, she couldn't quite mask the anger on her face. The Dogs yelped and scurried out of her way as she made her way through the dark halls with determined steps. She reached the Alpha's chamber and opened the door without invitation. The alpha was discussing something with a pair of Diamond Dog mares. She stopped herself from simply barking the demand for an explanation, and instead addressed the mares in the correct ways that Diamond Dog mares should be addressed, but in a way that brooked no argument. This was between her and the Alpha. "Bitches, leave!"
Pony People With Pony NamesNEW author's notes, now with color! So, like, the original is the one at the bottom, which it seems like Orbiting Kettle likes (thanks, man ). Then he thought it could benefit from some polish, which if you'll read it, you'll find out is the case. However, since this story was a bit of a time-trial for me, I thought I might as well keep my old little one-shot, and include Kettle's new suggestion So, Orbiting Kettle new and improved version of Pony People With Pony Names (and I hope my over-clarification doesn't come across as sarcasm, I just haven't had anyone building on something I've written before, this is actually really exciting ): Tommy Gun leaned back in his chair with a satisfied grin. His grand plan was still going on despite the traitors and backstabbers that had been hiding among his own ponies. But that was the past. His new second had cleaned up the shop, brought the grunts back on track and was leading the pigs on a merry chase far away form the Westside Laundry business. He had to admit it, that stallion had an uncanny skill in staying always one step ahead of the cops and ratting out turncoats. Tommy Gun grabbed a cigar and lighted it, a smug grin as skewed as his tax-forms on his muzzle. Hiring Sting Operation has been the best thing he had ever done. That's was Kettle's improved version, here's my intentionally rushed original: In a mansion overlooking an old suburb of Manehatten, Tommygun leaned back in his chair. Everything was going according to plan. His operations had taken a hit after the ousting of several traitors among his old guard. But the pigs had been running around like clueless foals after he placed his new wiseguy in charge of several operations, the same stallion who had busted the aforementioned traitors. In just a few months, he had managed to fool the cops away from the money laundering on westside completely. With any luck, his recent losses would be recuperated and then some. Yeah, Tommygun thought with satisfaction, that stallion, Sting Operation, has an uncanny ability to stay ahead of the law. He was the best damn enforcer he had ever hired.
MLAABQ Gaiden: Sing Me A SongIt was the day after the big movie-night with almost all her new friends, when Gabe was walking across a field in the outskirts of Ponyville, enjoying the pleasant weather, when a sound caught her ear. Aiming her ears forward, and looking up, she spotted Rainbow Dash’s house, and heard Rainbow Dash’s voice faintly sounding from it. “Dun-Dun-Dun-Dun-Dun-Dun-Dun-Dun-Dun-Dun-Dun-Dun-Dun-Dun-Dun-Dun-DASH! A-AAAAAH! Savior of Equestria! Dun-Dun-Dun-Dun-Dun-Dun-Dun-Dun-Dun.” At this point, Gabe had bitten down on her hoof, trying desperately to stifle her laughter, lest Rainbow heard her. After about half a minute, she had to start stumbling away from the house, her teeth still clutching a hoof as her ears automatically splayed back to catch Rainbow’s raspy words. “... She’ll save, with her mighty wings- all the mares, all the stallions, all the things- yeah the mighty Dash!"
