Ponies, Zombies and a whole lot of Guns

by TheMasterBronyDoctorGuy

Rating: teen
Tags: Adventure, Crossover, Main 6, Gore, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Dark, Other, Comedy
Length: 2429

Tank Dempsey, Takeo Masaki, Nikolai Belinski, and Edward Richtofen have been caught in a very unlikely time of friendship, but danger lurks as magic isn't the only thing they have to worry about. A Call of Duty Zombies Crossover

ENTRY Seven Four Zero Two Eight!!!

Dear Diary,

Ve have arrived in some strange land of ponies und, sadly, zombies. I fear zer is no vorld safe from Samantha's reign over ze undead. Nor is it safe from ze affects of element vone vone five.

Edit: Now back in production, again

Published 2015-02-11 03:50:02 UTC
Last updated 2015-04-28 23:22:33 UTC

The MDT Malfunctions

Author's Note

Before you begin. I want to point out Richtofan's language. As he is a German he has a German accent leading to his w sounds being v, his th sounds being s or z, etc. Etc. This is to make it seem a bit more realistic to his character. This note is also to ensure no one thinks I am typing nonexistent words. :derpytongue2:

P.S. yes I know this has been done before. No I do not care how many times.

The MDT Malfunctions

Location: Der Riese.
Year: 1946
Time: 12:00 AM

Gun fire can be heard as zombies begin to close in on the MDT. Tank Dempsey is fiddling with the WunderWaffe as Edward Richtofan works on getting the MDT up and running. Takeo Masaki and Nikolai Belinski are pumping bullets into the undead horde.

"How much longer Richtofan!? They're closing in fucking fast," Dempsey yelled. He was searching his pockets frantically for one last shot for the WunderWaffe. One was all he'd ever need.

"Yes Doctor I would like to leave now," Nikolai said as he reloaded his PPSH. Takeo stayed silent as he pulled out his katana.

"Hopefully a bit longer. I really am vorking as hard as I can but if somevone hadn't broken ze circuits in a fit of rage it vould be a lot quicker," Richtofan yelled back. He wasn't going to let Samantha win. No matter how hard it was to get to her.

"Hey! I said I was fucking sorry you sick piece of shit," Dempsey shouted. He pulled out his pistol and shot a zombie in the head," and if it weren't for you we wouldn't be here anyways!"

"Vell you vant to save your country so it vould be viser to listen to me," Richtofan said as he flipped a switch. The MDT came to life for a few seconds before shorting out," Dammit! Zis maybe a few more minutes!"

"Doctor I want to leave, these zombies are getting to close! I think they want my Vodka," Nikolai shouted as he threw his PPSH to the ground and pulled out his knife.

Richtofan replugged a wire into the circuit board as he tried to get the MDT online. "Ha I found one! I found another shot for the Wonder Waffle," Dempsey shouted with glee as he loaded the bolt.

"Use it Dempsey. Use it and save us from these creatures of unnatural forces," Nikolai shouted as he threw his knife at a zombie. Richtofen flipped another switch and the MDT came to life once more. This time it stayed online and Dempsey jumped in. Richtofan, Takeo, and Nikolai followed suit as Dempsey fired the WunderWaffe bolt. The MDT seemed to fail as the electrical shock fried the circuitry. Then the MDT sent them away. The zombies falling over in agony as the electricity shocked them out of commission.

Location: Unknown
Year: Unknown
Time: Unknown

Richtofan stood up with some trouble. He looked around to find them in a wide open field. The grass was tall and mountains could be seen out in the distance. To his left was a Tank Dempsey shaking his head. Takeo stood up and pulled out his katana viewing his surroundings carefully before relaxing. Nikolai lay in a ball. His eyes were closed as he shook and asked," are we safe?"

"I think so. For fucking once we don't need to worry about zombies," Dempsey said as he started walking off.

"Ver do you sink you are going," Richtofan asked. He couldn't see much past the mountains as fog was rolling in from the mountains direction.

"I'm gonna find civilization and ask around for any of your Illuminati friends or Group 935 buddies. Maybe they can help us get back on track."

"Und if zey don't exist here?"

"Well then you're gonna build a teleporter and get me some more shots for the Wonder Waffle," Dempsey said as he walked off. Takeo, Nikolai, and Richtofan followed behind as they searched for a path or some sign of civilization.

Not the Civilization they were Expecting

Location: Unkown
Year: Unknown
Time: Unknown

The walk was long as they had been walking for hours with no sign of civilization. The fog had rolled in and the four men couldn't see much. "Doctor what time is it," Nikolai asked as he trudged through the fog.

"Vell let me see. It seems to be 12:00 A.M. last time I checked," Richtofan shouted as he looked down at his watch, what was left of it at least," vich vas before ve left Der Riese!" Nikolai grumbled as he shook his empty bottle of Vodka. Takeo was walking silently, he had been since they had arrived.

"Yo Takeo whatcha doin being all quiet," Dempsey asked.

"I am simply ignoring all of you. For I am asking the ancients for a sign of civilization," Takeo said as he went silent again.

"Well that sounds..... fucking boring," Dempsey said as he continued to move ahead. Out of the fog a shape was beginning to come into view. As they approached it Nikolai shouted with glee as the shape turned out to be a house. The windows seemed a bit low for a human house. The roof was made of straw and the house was about two or three stories tall.

"Vell I guess ve found some sort of civilization but who says ve'll find any Group 935 members," Richtofan asked as they walked around the house. To their left a barn began to appear and the smell of apples touched their noses. Nikolai caught glimpse of some sort of light and he began running towards it.

"Nikolai get back here you fucking dumbass," Dempsey shouted as he chased after him.

"But Dempsey it is some sort of light," Nikolai shouted back.

"I don't give a shit. Get back here before you get a bullet through your brain," Dempsey yelled as he tackled Nikolai.

"Well what in tarnations am ah lookin at," a feminine voice said as the light moved closer," you don' look like normal pony folk."

"I'll have you know we aren't ponies missy," Dempsey said as he got up," and who in the hell says tarnations these days?"

"Well ah do o' course. And if ya'll ain't ponies then what are ya'll?"

"Vell madame first let me introduce mienself. I am Doctor Edvard Richtofan, und zis is Nikolai, Takeo, und Dempsey," Richtofan said as he approached," ve are not ponies but merely humans."

"Humans? Ah thought them things didn't exist," the voice said as the owner came into view. Richtofan looked at her intriguingly, while Nikolai rubbed his eyes multiple times, Dempsey stood still and stared at it in shock, while Takeo pulled out his katana in alarm.

"Holy shit balls," Dempsey said," you're a fucking horse." The horse was orange with a blonde mane and tail. She wore a brown stetson and she had apples on the side of her flank.

"Very interesting, very interesting indeed," Richtofan said as he walked around her," a talking, orange horse, vith a stetson."

"Well ya'll don' look to good," the horse said as she looked in disgust at their clothes. She was right they were covered head to toe with torn clothes, skin, scabs, scratch marks, and bite marks. Nikolai was wearing a blue russian scarf around his neck while his hat had fallen off somewhere. His shirt was gray and was torn in the arms and stomach area. His pants were deep blue with blood across the knees while his boots were covered in dried blood and mud. Richtofan's black gloves were covered in dried blood, along with his boots. His Nazi jacket was wrinkled and torn with blotches of blood showing. Dempsey had blood dried onto his shaved head with scabs along his knuckles. His jacket was green and had its sleves rolled up. His tan pants were drenched in mud while his boots looked brown but were actually black. Takeo's katana was poorly cleaned, his grey jacket was sown in many places along with his pants. His boots were covered in mud while his hands had blisters and scabs.

"She is right. We aren't very presentable at the moment," Takeo said as he slid his katana back in its sheath. Richtofan nodded in agrement.

"Very true. Vould you mind if ve stayed here for ze night," Richtofan asked.

"It's five o'clock in tah mornin. Ya'll can stay fer breakfast if ya'll want," the horse said.

"Dank ja. Oh ver are mien manners. I never got your name," Richtofan said as he followed the horse.

"Why thank you fer askin. Mah name is Applejack," the horse said.

"Thank you for your hospitality Ms. Applejack," Takeo thanked her," you have much honor in your soul." They followed her inside and were greeted by three more horses. A filly, a stallion, and a very old looking horse.

"Richtofan, Takeo, Nikolai, and Dempsey," Applejack introduced," meet Applebloom, Big Macintosh, and Granny Smith."

"Gutentag," Richtofan greeted. He put his hand over Dempsey's mouth before he could say something stupid.

"Hello family of horses," Nikolai said as he walked up to Big Mac. He glared into Big Mac's eyes for a while before laughing. "This is strong stallion. He would make good war horse on the Russian lines."

"Nikolai be honorable. These horses are not just any kind of horses. These horses can talk and even think smarter than you," Takeo chuckled.

"Alright calm down everyvone. Ve are merely here to rest nozing else," Richtofan said. Takeo walked into the next room and sat down on the floor. Nikolai put his arm around Big Mac and they walked off talking and laughing.

"They're most likely getting something to chug down," Dempsey said.

"As long as zey don't cause trouble ve are fine," Richtofan said as he walked off. Dempsey looked out the window at the fog and just hoped he would be able to find a way back.

When, Where, How?

Location: Apple Family Farm
Time: Somewhere near five o clock in the morning.
Year: Unknown

"And I said what do you mean this is your gun? it's my vodka," Nikolai laughed. Him and Big Mac were sitting at the kitchen table with some very strong apple cider. Big Mac laughed as he slammed his mug down on the table causing it to shake.

"I dunno who's worse, Nikolai or Big Mac," Dempsey said. He was fiddling with his pistol aiming it this way and that.

"Your face," Richtofan replied as he tinkered with, what once was, a shovel. It now had two antenna and a piece of glass on it.

"What the fuck are you doing anyways," Dempsey asked. For once he actually was interested in Richtofan's tinkering. What was happening to him?

"Making a tracer. I'm sure ve aren't ze only ones who vere brought here. Maybe Samantha's influence is multidimensional. She could be raising ze dead as ve speak. I'm just making zis to ensure I can keep an eye out for vone fifteen traces." He didn't know why he was even explaining it to Dempsey. He was so stupid.

"That sounds...... oddly helpful." What was he saying? How the fuck could it be helpful?

"Vell it is actually. Dank Ja. For vonce you aren't being stupid. You're acting a bit strange are you alright?" Why did he just ask that? He hated Dempsey to the core

"Honestly I have no fucking idea. Hold on, why are you asking me? You're the one who isn't alright." Why was he concerned about Richtofan anyways. This place must have some sort of supernatural field to make you act nice or something.

"Just shut it. I'm busy," Richtofan grumbled as he went back to work.

Location: Cemetery
Time: 5:39 A.M.
Year: Unknown

The stones stand still, words engraved into them. A group of ponies are gathered around a gravestone while another uses their magic to place a coffin in the hole in front of them. The ground beneath the coffins begin to tremble as a green glow lights up the fog. The ponies stop what their doing and begin to worry. Was it some sort of dark magic or some sort of trick?

"Oh my Celestia," a pony yelled as a hoof rose from the ground. It was decayed with a pale blue color. More hooves rose from the ground followed by heads. Their eye had an orange glow and their mouths hung open, their groans and screams echoing. The ponies tried to leave but the decayed ponies were already climbing out of the dirt. Some of them had missing legs, others were missing ears and plenty of skin. The dead ponies began to surround the living. They soon were on top of them and the living ponies screamed as their attackers jumped on them, biting and tearing flesh.

Location: Apple Family Farm
Time: 5:42 A.M.
Year: Unknown

"I have asked the ancients for information on where we are but they do not answer. This place is not of our world," Takeo said.

"Oh yes by ze vays vere are ve exactly," Richtofan asked.

"Ya'll are in Equestria," Applejack replied picking up a mug of empty cider. Nikolai and Big Mac had fallen asleep at the table, drooling all over the mounds of mugs of cider.

"Now next question Fucktofan," Dempsey said," how the fuck did we get here?"

"Ze MDT must have malfunctioned causing us to be teleported to another dimension of some sort. Zis vas most likely the farthest it could send us," Richtofan replied," but if we got here by teleporter then we can leave via teleporter."

"Great," Dempsey said," one last question. What time and year is it?"

"The year is about 20,000 A.D, A.D stands for After Discord. The time's about six in ta mornin."

"Even better. We can get going guys," Dempsey said as he walked up to Nikolai and pulled him off his chair.

"My Vodka," Nikolai yelled as he jolted awake.

"Shut up Russian grab your shit and lets go," Dempsey said as he stomped towards the door. The others gathered their things and followed him.

"Vonce again Dank Ja for all of your hospitality," Richtofan shouted. Miles away the dead was rising and would soon be upon Ponyville.

Author's Note

Entry Seven Four Zero Two Nine.

Dear Diary,

My curiosity is peaked. Zes horses are interesting to me und I vould like to study zem further. I vill make sure to take one back vith us. Dead or Alive.