Twilight paced around ArcaneLexicon’s living room. She and her friends were lucky enough to accompany Princess Celestia to his world. She recalled Princess Celestia’s wise words before they entered the portal.
“Behave yourself, Twilight Sparkle. We are here to ensure that Arcane writes a fitting story starring my sister. You and the elements shall be there to help me in case we have any trouble.”
Twilight was sure to behave herself like a good filly would. Even with her ascension, she took pride on being Princess Celesita’s most prized pupil.
What she did not expect though, was how BORING it would be.
Her friends were lucky.
Rarity was trying the different kinds of Earth tea on Arc’s table. Joining her was Applejack, who was now having a taste of Fuji Apples.
Fluttershy was watching a nature documentary about the Titmouse, while Rainbow Dash lounged next to her, reading “Leviathan.” Arcane promised a riveting non-stop ride, and the way that the book had Rainbow under its spell, it was pretty sure that a rival to Daring Do was found.
Arcane kept Pinkie busy by having her bake some brownies, muffins and biscuits.
As for Twilight, all she did was sit there. She would have given anything to smile and wave.
“I should just look around. I’m pretty sure Arc won’t mind” thought Twilight
Twilight stood up and started to explore her surroundings. She used her magic to open a door. Inside was Arc’s bedroom. What surprised
Twilight was how Arc’s bedroom was decorated.
His pillows were encased in covers adorned with Trixie’s face, while a comforter decorated with Trixie in all her majesty and grandeur covered the bed. Numerous Trixie plushies were on top of the bed. A desk with another TV also held many Trixie figurines ranging from the largest, to the smallest.
“Seriously, who does Trixie blow to get fans like this?” asked an annoyed Twilight. “All I get are little kids and weird sickos” Twilight said as she closed the door.
Further exploration brought here near Arcane’s bookshelf. Twilight was amazed at the tomes that were placed upon this bastion of knowledge. Twilight used her magic and grabbed a couple of books off the shelves.
She opened the first one and found that it contained diagrams and specifications for numerous mechanical components. She closed the book and looked at the title.
Land Cruiser
Diesel 4&6 Cyl
Max Ellery’s
Factory
Workshop Manual
1972-1990
“Hmm, we need something like this in Equestria. It would be easier to train the ponies that fixed stuffed instead of having to rely on their instincts given by their cutie marks if they had this.” Twilight then stored this thought into her mental checklist.
The next book she opened looked to be a rule book. She had come across this numerous times playing Oubliettes and Ogres. This one though had a more “sciencey” feel to it.
“Hmm, Extended Range Particle Projection Cannons?” She read a few pages off the book. Given the chance, she would ask Arcane about this “Battletech.”
Some ponies didn’t like Oubliettes and Ogres, mused Twilight. It wasn’t enough of a fantasy world for them. With unicorns wielding magic, earth ponies possessing great strength and pegasi being able to fly, ponies would rather form an actual group and try to slay real monsters that lived near, or inside the Everfree forest. They would normally just kill a rat, but for a group that lived out their fantasies, they considered those rats to be ROUS (Rodents of Unusual Size). Maybe this “Battletech” thing would entice them. More players always meant more friends, after all.
Twilight opened the next book. She was floored by what she read.
The airplane is powered by two General Electric Model GE90-115BL engines. The engines are rated at 115,000 pounds of takeoff thrust each.
“One hundred fifteen thousand pounds of thrust? That’s like twenty percent more power than the tornado in Hurricane Fluttershy! From just one engine?! I’d need hundreds of pegasi in order to create that much force!”
Twilight felt herself sweating. She turned to another random page.
Navigational systems include global positioning system (GPS), air data inertial reference system (ADIRS), VOR, DME, ILS, ADF, ATC transponder, weather radar, and the flight management system (FMS). The FMS...
“GE90-115BL, GPS, ADIRS, VOR, DME, ILS, ADF, ATC, FMS. All those acronyms!---” Twilight felt herself drooling.
A notebook fell beside her, snapping her out of her fantasies.
“Hmm, this looks like Arcane’s hoof- err, handwriting. A diary, perhaps?”
Twilight looked around and saw that Arcane was busy typing on his “trusty eight year old laptop.”
Celestia was talking to him, giving him ideas on how death was nonexistent in their world, and how to use death to kill off all those OC’s and alicorns that kept popping up and wreaking havoc all over Equestria.
Everypony else was busy and no pony seemed to notice her.
Twilight opened the notebook and shuddered at what she saw.
Figure out how many fire detectors I need to in order to make a neutron gun
Twilight felt something stir inside her. She kept reading
Adjust fuel governor to compensate for extra air caused by free flowing air filter to achieve proper stoichiometric ratio.
“Ohmygoshomygoshmygoshohmygosh. He's talking my language!” Twilight gushed. She kept fanning herself with her hoof but it proved to be ineffective in cooling her down. She kept moved to another random page.
I wonder if Twilight would understand the nuances of quantum physics. She is tearing a fabric in space-time whenever she teleports after all.
“YES! YES! YES! YES! YES! YES! YES! YES! YES!" thought Twilight who was now breathing heavily.
Once again she opened to another random page.
Step 1,579: Nanites would then rearrange the atomic substructure of lead, taking individual atoms off the silver found in the nitrate mixture. With the added atoms, the nanites would then restructure the metallic substructure lattice of lead and transform lead into gold.
Step 1,560: PROFIT!
Twilight felt something running down her leg.
Her mind was screaming. “This is not scientifically impossible! A human, with a one thousand five hundred and sixty step long checklist?!”
Unfortunately, the screams of her brain was drowned out by the cacophony coming from her heart. “’HAVE MY FOALS ARCANELEXICON!!!” squealed her heart.
SMASH!
Every pony looked at the commotion coming from Celestia and Arcane. Celestia seemed to have flipped a table.
"YOU SET MY SISTER UP WITH A ROCK?! You have lost your mind and your writing ability!" screamed an irate Celestia who was now angrily breathing down on ArcaneLexicon.
"Well, I don't think anyone has shipped her with a rock yet. Just think about it! LunaRock! Has a nice ring to it!" answered Arcane.
"Just write a sequel to Celestia’s Wish and I'll forget about it" Celestia said.
"Well this is somewhat a semi-sequel since it happens after your story..." replied a cowed Arcane.
“In that case, I have no other choice. Twilight! You and your friends may do as you please. Don't let me stop you" commanded Celestia.
“I can read anything I want? I can press anything in Arcane’s abode? I can flick any---“
Caught in both an orgasm and a mindgasm, Twilight’s brain did everything it could to preserve its sanity.
It shut down.
“Loading Safe Mode. Loading Safe Locomotor Controls. Loading Simple Speech Engine. Disregarding all consequences."
Twilight was reduced to a blabbering idiot.
Her safe mode consisted of her pressing any button she could press, and flicking any switch she
could flick.
Her Simple Speech Engine consisted of only two words: “FOR SCIENCE!”
She flicked the light switch. “FOR SCIENCE!
She pressed the buttons on the microwave. “FOR SCIENCE!”
She would have pushed Arcane’s buttons too, if she could, but something caught her attention.
It was shiny!
It was RED!
It was a button!
"Simple Speech Engine Update Completed"
“OOOOOOOOOHHH!!! WHAT DOES THIS BUTTON DO?! FOR SCIENCE!”
If Twilight was in her right mind, she would have stopped the moment she heard the words “WAIT TWILIGHT!” But with her universe spanning knowledge wiped out with the onslaught of immeasurable mindgasms and her common sense quivering under the assault of countless orgasms, she did what any idiot would do.
She pressed the button.
Author's Note
Well, this ends the story that came from the author's note at the end of Luna's Speed Dating Experience. Who knew it would lead to this and its sequel, Adventures in Writing.
Will there be more stories based on my author's notes? Only time will tell!
