The thunder roared in the skies again, electrifying the atmosphere, as if tearing the clouds apart.

Shortly after my pegasus ride dropped me on the crowded streets of the metropolis, clouds multiplied far above the city, not taking too long before releasing the first piercing droplets of rain. They fell like knives, and each wet drop penetrated the layers of fabric and wool as acid on thin paper.

The ponies were quick to open their umbrellas or seek nearby shelter. Luckily, Canterlot had many good places to avoid getting drenched.

I found my spot in a cozy coffee shop a few blocks away from the royal city gates. I picked an empty table by the window, and asked a large cup of tea with honey. From my place, I observed the flow of simulated life.

At least in the simulation itself, this part of Equestria seemed to have a quite unpredictable weather. It reminded me of New England and its crazy winters, with temperatures rising and falling twice an hour. Although here it was impossible to know if the sudden changes were all part of Ada's tricky program, or just a natural quality of this hilly environment.

The afternoon was already kicking in when I realized that so far, my progress in this stage had been pathetic. It also made me think of my real body, still numb in that leather chair. Time passed in the game, but also passed in real life, virtual food wasn't a good source of protein. I simply couldn't stay here forever, and the last thing I wanted was to wake up all stiff, with my pants pissed, and my throat sore.

That would definitely ruin the good moments.

I had to find Twilight, and soon. She couldn't be very far, she was a silly princess now, and these creatures leave in equally silly castles. I finished my tea, together with some crumbly almond cookies, and dropped a coin in the tip jar. Actually, considering I only had those golden coins in my bag, the tip was probably way more than the own bill.

The waitress was about to have a nice surprise, and so I.

"Crap..." I muttered, staring at the splattering rain outside, which soon would be splattering on my head.

The castle was only a short walk away from the shop, I could see its towers from here, and the front gardens slightly blurred by the fog. In a sunny day it wouldn't be a problem to get there, unfortunately it wasn't the case.

I had no idea if virtual colds were a thing, but I was about to find out.

"You're not stopping me again, Ada. I know you're listening!" I said to myself as I stepped outside, clearly eliciting some weird stares from a group of ponies passing by.

It didn't mattered. Ignoring the freezing showers pouring down over me, I walked fast, following the road, my boots adhering to the slippery sidewalks leading up to the castle. Carriages crossed the avenue in a hurry, puddles splashing back in my direction.

"Dammit!" I tried to dodge from the imminent wave of muddy water, my trench coat getting even more drenched, as if that was possible. I wish I could have opted for the leather jacket and hoodie, when I was given the opportunity.

Soon after I received the dream device I instantly expected many things from it; I expected possible side effects such as headaches, nausea, and maybe - and that's a big maybe - some realistic entertainment.

Certainly, I didn't crossed my mind the possibility of collapsing at the doors of the royal castle, after a long journey through a cobblestone road in the forest, an illegal pegasus ride, and a terrible tour via Canterlot. I was dripping wet and coughing like a sick dog with chronic tuberculosis.

It's a hell of a feeling.

I also wasn't expecting to find the gateways closed for me.

Now that I think about it, it made a lot of sense. It's not like the British royalty would let Buckingham palace doors wide open to every pedestrian, citizens or not of their country. It had to be a limit for fuck's sake. Why would Celestia allow such a thing in Equestria?

She wouldn't.

"What the heck- you must be kidding me!" I whined, standing in front of the gates, my arms open as the rain washed my hopes away.

Two guards approached from the inside, looking at me from behind the fences, spears by their sides. A clear sign of 'don't mess with our shit'
"Halt." One of them said, he was a considerably bulky stallion, gray fur, and just like the other unicorn by his side, wore a polished golden armor. I couldn't see their cutie marks even if I tried, these guys looked like clones. "Identity yourself, human." He said.

"Human my ass, I'm Lord Goodhart, you must respect me!" I shouted at the stallion, who raised an eyebrow at me, as if I was a dead thing washed ashore. I couldn't look more deplorable.

"How dare you, lord or not, to shout such profanities in front of the royal lands?"

"I dare, because so far, my arrival here has been a disaster! I have come from distant lands beyond the horizon of your planet, only to find Princess Twilight Sparkle." I said, pointing at myself, as the rain oozed from my coat. "You see this? All of this mess wasn't on my plans."

The stallions shared a look, and the unicorn guard spawned a parchment in front of him. When he finally passed his eyes over the whole thing, the paper disappeared, and he turned back at me. "There's no Lord Goodhart mentioned here, I regret you'll have to contact the royal diplomacy bureau again, and explain the situation."

"Look, I don't give a damn about your list, I need to see Twilight Sparkle. It's a very important... Thing."

"It doesn't matter, you are not in the royal list, so far, we can do nothing for you. Besides, Princess Twilight lives in Ponyville." He said, staring to walk away.

"Royal list... Royal lands- you know what, I'm going to shove my royal fist in your face!" The guards stared petrified at me as I jumped on the fence, and for two milliseconds or something between I thought I was about to show them my outstanding human strength, until there was pink.

Yes, a pink flash, and then generalized pain followed by darkness.

I had just been electrocuted by a magical fence. A fucking pony fence. And it hurts so bad, that my blood felt like electrified Gatorade. In lapses of conscience I felt my limp body being carried by creatures I could not see. I was dizzy and senseless. My ears still throbbed, and I couldn't move a muscle, nothing that could help me to get the dream device away from my neck.

It was real, fuck, it was way too real.

If for some reason I returned to my senses missing a liver in a dirty parking lot in Uzbekistan, I wouldn't be surprised.

But for some heavenly reason, that wasn't my final destiny.

When I woke up, a shiver ran through my spine, and not because I was truly awake in my apartment, but because I was still in the simulation. Equestria was running, and my face was planted on a dirt road, tiny rocks still stuck in my skin as I straightened my body.

"W-what the hell is going on?" I grumbled, struggling to get back on my feet. My hands still burned, and two vertical lines marked the place where the bars touched my skin, a painful reminder of my first experience with magic. Still I raised my arm to touch the Dream Device. It was on my neck, where it should be, and I thanked god for that.

A disaster, from everything I had tried, this simulation was the worst thing to ever mess with my nervous system. Not even my experience with LSD and Oculus Rift could've been worse.

I can't say Ada lied to me, but her promises were devil promises. She promised me Equestria, and shit, this was Equestria. Welcome to paradise.

I was ready to give up, go back to my room, eat something and go to sleep. Next morning I'd be ready to accept whatever Neil would have say, because I was stupid to try that shit.

When I was about to pluck the device out of my neck, and forget about Ada forever, someone happened to walk past me.

Yeah, another pony - but not any pony. And in that specific moment, I had the same odd feeling that I wasn't playing the game, it was the system playing with me.

"Sweet Celestia, are you alright?" Twilight Sparkle herself asked me, two saddle bags filled to the top with books by her side, a closed umbrella sticking out from one of them. The rain had stopped, but I was still in the mud.

I chuckled, laying against a tree. Oh the irony...

My trench coat heavy and dripping from water. Half of it covered in a thick layer of dirt.

"Not really..." I said. "But I'll survive."

Looking around, I understood I was no longer in Canterlot. The guards, or heavens knows who, had dropped me in a road near Ponyville. In fact, I could see the easily recognizable town hall rooftop.

"You look terrible, what happened? Are you lost?" Twilight asked, approaching carefully.

"My carriage crashed in the forest, somewhere near Canterlot." I repeated the same old story. "I was in a diplomatic mission- the wind... God it was so strong. A loud cracking noise filled the cabin, and suddenly nothing. When I woke up... Celestia- there were t-these beasts in the forest. I was so scared." I covered my eyes with an arm, cleaning the stains of water and dirt, pretending to wipe a tear. Damn, I was a good psychopath.

"Beasts? What kind of beasts?" She asked, her voice showing concern.

"I don't know... That thing dragged me down here- I'm so sorry... The day is over for me, I just want to go home, take these drenched clothes off, and have some sleep."

"You can't go home like this! You may be hurt, the weather is terrible. I doubt the portals are working in these conditions." Portals... What the hell she's talking about. I wonder if there's a parallel earth, with another version of me, and another Dream Device, leading to another Equestria. I think the idea just broke me.

The thought was carried away when Twilight grabbed my arm with a wing. "Come, I'll give you something to eat, and then we can decide what to do with you Mr..."

"Spencer, just Spencer." I said, happy, even after being humiliated, electrified, fooled, dragged, drenched, and misled. I finally had Twilight - or she had me.

Something flashed, and floating in front of me was a brilliant sign saying:

'Achievement Unlocked: Wrong Choices, Perfect Outcomes'

Author's Note

Sorry for the long hiatus, I hope some of you still remember this story. I'm starting to work on this thing again.

Short chapter, but I want to keep the story moving.