Fallout: Equestria - Date with D3st1ny

by sophos

Rating: teen
Tags: Original Character, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy, Romance, Adventure, Crossover
Length: 4292

A Pony must venture out into the wastes, for a date with an online aquaintance.

Arith Metic-- a witch-- conjures online aquaintences, agrees to meet one, and then haphazardly wanders into the wastes with a couple "friends" and relatively no information.

A story I wrote for this contest. As well as hone to my romance skills, which are not my strongsuit. Also includes a rich amount of world setting, for no reason at all. I feverously (if James Joyce can make up words than, by georgiable, so can I) wrote 91.666 % of this fic in a day.
[Edit: I won said contest!]

Published 2015-02-11 16:40:01 UTC
Last updated 2015-02-11 16:40:01 UTC

Muahaha-- Oh, a message.

The room was dark as pitch but for a sickly, green glow. The weak light spilled from a black cauldron like heat from a hearth, casting dying shadows upon the ceiling as it ebbed. The young mare watched these shadows intently as she breached the doorway, and wrapped her mouth around the bit of her sword. She had been drawn by a sound permeating the grand halls, a sound she equated to that of hungry flies. She drew her blade slowly and quietly, just under the soft buzz.

“MuahahahaHAHA!” cackled a mare in a large, pointed hat with a wide brim. Her silhouette reared and heaved with each, hearty laugh; her shadow above joined the in the madness with added fervor.

And then, light...

*Ping-Bom* sounded the intercom, as the stable lights buzzed to life. The two mares, one in squire's barding and the other in witch's robes, blinked at the dawn before recognizing each other.

“Arith?” said the squire, as she sheathed her sword. “Has thou been casting spells the whole night!?”

The witch ran a hoof through her disheveled, orange mane. “We aren’t in the courtyard, Blackberry. You don't have to olde it up.”

“Just tell me then. What was so funny you were laughing like a maniac?”

A rush of blood and colour rose in Arith's vine green cheeks. “Oh! I was just working late, trying to get this incantation working, and...”

“And?” Blackberry sat on her haunches, with a metallic clank. She lifted her visor just to raise a questioning brow.

“It turned out, I didn't have the right compiler. Ha ha... ha.”

The squire's gray eyes were keener than most, and the witch was aware of this. Arith's cauldron was one of many sitting in rows of four within the room, and its low hum reminded her of crickets at a stage show; her blushing cheeks were soon a brighter pink than Blackberry's natural coat.

Blackberry shook her head. “I'll never understand you witches and wizards. I've got a morning shift at the drawbridge to get at.” she rose to her hooves and began to make her leave, but stopped at the door. “Try to get some sleep sometime please. Your a mess.”

“Sure. This is an easy fix.” Arith said, as she primped her hat and robe.

“If you say so.”

Arith waited a few moments for Blackberry's hoofsteps to die away, then waited another moment. Satisfied she was alone again, in body, she turned a dunked her head into the cauldron. A blue light enveloped her horn, then the keyboard; she re-read the last few lines printed on the screen, and laughed again.

'U R so funny! lol!' she typed, and pressed enter. A second later, the text appeared on the screen.

'D3st1ny: Thanx! Thought I lost ya there.' promptly appeared in response.

Pumpkin: Srry, had a situation over here.

D3st1ny: Oh? Do tell.

Pumpkin: I dont wanna :P

D3st1ny: Please!

D3st1ny: Just a tiny bit? I tell you a story ;)

Pumpkin: Tell me first.

D3st1ny: Come on, you need to learn to compromise.

Pumpkin: Fine. I'll meet you–

“BOO!” Blackberry lept from inside the neighboring cauldron.

“Guh da FUH!” Arith clutched her chest to bar her hearts escape. “What are doing!? There's– There's sensitive equipment in there!”

Blackberry didn't bother asking Arith what she was hiding, and instead rose herself high on the rim of the other cauldron to peer down at Arith's terminal monitor. Arith draped herself over her cauldron, and adjusted her position with every jerk of Blackberry's head. Finally, Blackberry's curiosity outgrew her sense of humor. She lept over the rim, shoved Arith aside, and dunked her head in the cauldron. Arith fell to the floor then, in panic, sprang to her hooves and dunked her head along side Blackberry.

“What are you doing on this thing that's so important!?” Blackberry said. Her voice resonated in the cramped, acoustic space. She read through a number of the messages, and began to laugh.

They were cheek and cheek and, while Arith fought for space, the last bit of text on the terminal screen caught her eye. It read:

D3st1ny: Come on, you need to learn to compromise.

Pumpkin: Fine. I'll meet you

“Oh SHIT!” Arith's voice boomed in their ears and, in fact, could've been heard from the hall. “He's gonna think I'm a creep or something!” She said, as she seized the keyboard in her magic. She typed: 'Sorry, I meant to say: I'll meet you halfway and tell you half of what hap–' before new text stopped her in her tracks.

D3st1ny: Okay! I can meet you at Big Bell Rock Farm. Is that close enough?

Arith breaths became harder and more frequent, as a location added itself to her PipBuck's auto-map. It was only a few miles away.

“Wait.” Blackberry said in a low tone. “That's... outside.”

Arith deleted what she had typed thus far, and typed a new response without thinking; she was afraid she would lose her nerve if she stopped to think. She pressed enter.

Pumpkin: Yeah, I'll be there before noon!

“Arith, who have you been talking to?”

D3st1ny: Gr8! Soon as I can, I'll get some stuff together for a welcome party ;)

4shadow: Whassup.

4shadow: reads backlog.

4shadow: have you two been at this all night?

“Arith! Who are these Ponies?”

Arith and Blackberry attempted to simultaneously retract their heads from the cauldron, and to their displeasure. Arith put a hoof on the rim of the cauldron and another on Blackberry's skull, then yanked herself free. She began nervously trotting in either direction, sometimes in circles.

“What am I gonna wear? But I need to leave now. I must look horrible, but I can't be late.” Arith rambled.

Blackberry's patience wore out and, with her brow creased and teeth clenched, she took hold of Arith's shoulders and shook. “Arith Metic! What are you doing? How long have you been in contact with these Ponies!? Why haven't you let Marelin or the Overqueen know!? Does anyone else know about this!?”

“Uha ah ah a blah–” Arith threw her hooves in the air, breaking Blackberry's hold on her. “Juh STOP IT! A couple months.

“And you told no one why?”

Because Marelin is a crazy drunk, and the Overqueen is a fat drunk”

“Oh, what else is new?” Blackberry scoffed. “We have more stills than anything. Somepony has to drink all this cider.”

“Well, I thought they'd tell me to stop talking to them.”

“Why?”

Arith looked to her left, then down. “Security reasons.”

“Maybe they'd have a point.”

“I just wanted to keep talking to them, okay! Who else do I have to talk to around here? Do you want to start spending time together on a regular basis?”

The two young mares had known each other since childhood and, though they never had problems with each other, they were hardly more than acquaintances. It was now Blackberry's turn to avert her eyes.

“I still have a shift to go to. And if you don't tell a noble about this by the nightly feast, I will.”

“If that's how it is, then I won't be back for the feast.”

“How? Aren't there rules against leaving? Because I'm supposed to enforce those kinds of things.”

“What? No. There's no rules against leaving. If there was, this place wouldn't have been empty when our great-grand-parents found it.”

“Oh, right.” Blackberry paused, and raised a brow. “So, does that mean there's no rules against letting Ponies in either?”

Arith shrugged. “I guess so.”

“Then what am I guarding?”

“Come with me.”

“What?”

“Don't you want to see the outside?”

“It's dangerous... as far as we know.”

“I'm going, with or without you. You can just wait for me, to come back or not. It’s not like I'm not a warrior or anything.”

“Don't try to guilt me into it.”

“Then do it for the adventure! Not this act we have going on in here. Not jousting and drink and blacksmiths with fake beards! Be a real knight! I can be a real witch. We can have a REAL adventure!”

“I don't know...”

“It'll only be a few hours, tops, I swear it.”

“And if it–”

“I wizard swear it!”

Blackberry laughed aloud, until she realized Arith was serious. “Y-You really mean that.”

“Of course I do.” Arith turned in a seemingly random direction, with all the flair of a proper sorceress. “For you see, I have a Date with D3st1ny!

* * *

“I hate this damn thing.” Arith said, as she typed away on the Stable door's terminal. “I mean, the keyboard right but the screen is at ninety degree angle! Was it even a Pony that designed this thing?”

“Just hurry up! I don't want to end up dragging Limelight along with us. We won't hear the end of it, unless we get him killed.” Blackberry eyes drifted upwards, and a smirk teased at one side of her mouth.

The Stable door came sliding open with a screech, lights, and siren.

“Oops.” Arith said under the flashing, red light.

“Is it supposed to do that!”

Arith shrugged. “Let's, uh, just get moving.”

They were through the door and anxiously awaiting for the it to close when they noticed the corpses. Dozens of skeletons, many destroyed by time, littered the ground before the door.

“Whoa.” Blackberry said. “These are great props!”

“I know. I can't believe they didn't use some of these for the dungeon.”

“Yeah.” said a tiny, masculine voice. “I can't believe we've been making due with actual skeletons when all these are right here.”

The mares turned, then looked down. There stood Little Limelight: a short Unicorn with a dark gray coat and a gaudy, feathered hat. He was a bard in training and the other guard on shift this morning.

“Dammit, Limelight!”

“What did I do.” he sing-talked.

“Just come on!.”

“Where are we going? I need to think of a title for our ballad!”

The outside was a desolate place. An oppressive, gray slab of clouds lingered overhead; separating the world from the heavens. The earth itself was long since scorched by dark magic, and anything still standing after the century that followed bore every wound the elements refused to let close.

“Wow, this room is huge!” Blackberry said.

Arith nodded in agreement. “I mean, it's a mess but who's supposed to clean it all?”

“This is amazing.” said Limelight as a leathery, winged creature flying high in the distance let out a screech. “Let's go. There has to be other Ponies somewhere.”

“Oh, I know it.” Arith checked her PipBuck map. The Rock Farm was just a few miles away. “Alright, we can find a road– I guess that's like a flat hallway– and it shouldn't be much more than an hour walk.”

“There and back is two, so if your date lasts an hour that leaves us a couple more hours to look around. Any longer than that, and you know what you owe me.” Blackberry said to Arith.

“I know what I'm risking.”

“What's all this?” Limelight asked.

“She wizard swore to me this would only take a few hours.” Blackberry said without turning away.

“Oh ho! Now there's something worth singing about.”

“I'm calling six hours several, so any longer than that–”

“I heard you.” Arith said while rolling her eyes. “It's just... how long do dates usually last?”

“Heh heh, ha HA!”

“This is why we aren't friends.”

“Romance, check!” Limelight said aloud, marking notes on a pad with a quill.

Blackberry shook her head. “We have time, just tell me what you have planned and we'll work on it.”

“I-I just have this bouquet of flowers I was gonna give him.” Arith said sheepishly. “And some food, for a picnic.”

Limelight whistled. “I think romantic picnics are bit tired, dear.” He winked a bright, viridian eye.

“Actually,” Blackberry said, then paused to look around the desolate landscape. “... I don't think that's the case out here.”

“Hmm, the flowers are right out though.”

“Definitely, just put those on the menu.”

Arith stomped. “Well, what bright idea do you have? I don't do this everyday, or ever.” her breaths grew shallow and quick, as colour rose to her cheeks. “And it's not like I have another chance to get this right. IF he even shows, or wants to see me, or ever speaks to me again on the chat.”

“CALM down.” Blackberry said with half a mind to start shaking Arith again. “I said we have time. We can find a kinda grassy hill and you can practice.”

“Alright, let's go.”

* * *

Blackberry doffed her helm, spilling short locks of magenta mane. The wind picked up and teased the bangs over the white diamond on her forehead. She sat close to Arith, if only for size of the patch of grass, who likewise had removed her witch's hat. Arith's mane had the look of having spent a day in a hat and she was blindly, futilely primping it when not adjusting her glasses.

“Uhm. It's great to finally meet you.” Arith said.

“It's great to meet you too.” said Blackberry.

“So, this place is weird.”

“Yeah.”

“And... This is stupid!” Arith said as she rose to her hooves.

Blackberry pulled her, by her robe, back onto the grass. “Is that how you're gonna end your date?”

“No.”

“Then try again.”

“I don't know what to talk about!”

“All you do is talk to her, right?”

“Him.”

“Whatever! He wants to meet you, and that decision was based solely on his conversations with you. So he must like the conversation. So converse!”

“Alright! It's great to meet you–”

Limelight began a slow, romantic piece with his accordion. It was a tune like a warm breeze near a fire and a wheezing, portly animal.

“Don't get distracted.” said Blackberry.

“So, I started building a server. So I should be able to hold those files for you soon. I just have to change security settings for every little thing...”

Blackberry smiled and nodded. “Uh-huh.”

“You don't know what I'm talking about at all.”

“Nope. You two must talk about something else.”

“Music. We share the audio files and discuss them.”

“Wait.” sang Limelight. “You ooo were sending and receiving files from outside the Stable's tiles?”

“Uh, kinda.”

“That's kinda shady, lady. I would be afraid maybe.”

“Is any of that what you really want to talk to him about?” said Blackberry. “Gather your courage, mare! Do you need another cider?”

“NO. Just.” Arith closed her eyes, and took a deep breath “What made you decide to meet me?”

“Why wouldn't I want to? We have fun together in spirit.”

“But I didn't mean to send that. I'll be honest, it was a mistake and I never thought you'd agree to that.” Arith's ears sloped downward. “I thought you'd think it was really forward of me.”

“Well, maybe a little. But being forward isn't a bad thing.” Blackberry patted Arith on the head. “I'm glad you did, so cheer up.”

Much to Blackberry's surprise, Arith took the hoof in her own. “No, I can't cheer up. I'm scared you're gonna reject me!”

“What!? Why would I do that?”

“I don't know. I just know I can't deal with it!”

“Arith, you aren't this pathetic filly you seem to think you are. You have plenty of merits. We wouldn't be here if you didn't.”

“But, we don't really know each other.”

“Yeah, but that doesn't mean I don't want to. That's why I decided to spend time with you.”

“Really?”

“Of course. I know we've spoken, but we never actually spent time together and I wanted to; so, here I am. Perhaps despite my better judgment.”

“Ugh. I sound like such a loser don't I?”

“Ha! Well, I wouldn't say you sound like a winner.” Blackberry put her other hoof over Arith's. “But I know you are much more humble and passionate than I ever realized.”

They stayed like that a moment, and Limelight had introduced a genuinely sweet voice to his music. Blackberry found herself wondering how much of what she said was truth.

“This is stupid!” Arith cried as callously threw Blackberry's hooves aside. “It wasn't from lack of trying but this just isn't helping. Let's just get back on the road, I'll try to act like somebody cooler.”

* * *

“Ohmygosh Ohmygosh Ohmygosh!” cried Blackberry as she hugged Arith with all her might.

“Don't fucking let me go!” Arith screamed.

“I don't get it.” Limelight said with tears in his eyes. “Do they hate music or something!?”

The three of them huddled tightly together, behind a brick wall. Dust and chips rained on them in sheets every time one of the crazy Ponies' weapons boomed against it. At their hooves bled a fresh corpse, one of the crazy Ponies' own, perforated while trying to put a tire iron into Limelight's skull.

“Do something, Arith!” Blackberry said.

“Like what!?” Arith asked. “I don't know what dark magic is happening here. It just makes holes in Ponies. I don't wanna holes in me!” tears flooded from her eyes.

Another mad-pony came around the wall and, just as she had practiced a hundred times before, Blackberry drew her sword and cut. The blade cleaved through the Pony's muzzle, and she dropped the weapon from her mouth. It was a pistol, but to these three it was an instrument of nightmares; and they scrambled as far from it as they could. Blackberry proceeded to stab the mad-pony for good measure.

“I can't do that to all of them.” Blackberry admitted. A bullet struck the tip of her blade as it lingered from behind the disintegrating, brick wall. She yelped, and let the blade loose.

“I-I-I can get it with my magic.” Arith said.

“Don't! Get the... thing.”

“O-Okay.” Arith focused as much as she could with a brick wall slowly coming down on her. A blue light gingerly lifted the pistol and floated it to Blackberry.

Blackberry held it like she had seen the mad-pony do so, in her teeth, and felt something on the bit with her tongue. *BANG* the three tensed up to the deepest reaches of their hearts at the sound.

“So loud.” Limelight muttered, as the sound of trickling fluid came from beneath him.

“I'm going out there.” Blackberry said around the weapon.

“You can't. You'll be in pieces!” said Arith.

“It's not magic. I-It throws something... like a bolt or bullet.” Her eyes shifted to either side. “Besides, I am a warrior. Okay, here I go.”

Blackberry ran from the wall shooting no where near the crazy Ponies, but they ducked all the same. Soon enough, the pistol traded banging for clicking and she found herself behind a collapsed carriage. Another mad-pony made her way around the carriage, bearing down on Blackberry, when a blade– glowing blue– punched through the mad-pony’s sides. She dropped her weapon, but didn't stop. As she turned the corner, the blue light left the sword in favour of the mad-pony’s muzzle. Her head tipped up, and Blackberry seized the sword. She tore it lose from the mad-pony’s torso, and the crazed mare was felled.

“The other side!” shouted Arith.

Blackberry dropped her sword again to pick up the last mad-pony’s weapon. It was like a much bulkier version of the pistol. A stallion traversed past the other side of the carriage and fired weapons mounted on either side of him. Small pellets tore into her left upper-leg and shoulder, before she pulled the trigger and spat everything at the buck. His face was reduced to something unrecognizable.

“Fuck!” Blackberry said and spat out the weapon in the same breath.

Arith slid to her side and asked: “Are you okay?”

“No, I have a bunch of small holes.”

“I think I can heal this–”

“Nevermind that for now. We have to stop these maniacs. Can't you throw a fireball or something?”

“What? No. I mean, I could light something on fire then throw it.”

“How about that thing?” Blackberry motioned at the saddle with mounted weapons.

“I can try.” Arith undid the belts strapping the thing to the buck's corpse, then lifted it into the air. She took a few deep breaths, concentrated, and the contraption sparked into flames; it proceeded to fire wildly. “AHHH!” She hurled the blazing saddle over the carriage with great speed and panic.

“Okay. Let's not light those on fire.” Blackberry suggested.

Arith nodded in agreement. They sat and listened to the sound of the chaos ensuing on the other side of the carriage. “We have to do something. What do we have?”

Blackberry picked up her sword. “Just this.”

“Hey!” shouted Limelight. “Look up!”

The two mares looked up, and saw the torn canvas that once sheltered the inside of the carriage.

“I can wrap those maniacs in that.” said Arith.

“Yeah.” said Blackberry.

“And then set them on fire.”

“OR, I could stab them.”

“That too.” Arith locked eyes with Blackberry. “Alright, here we go.”

* * *

“Okay... Okay, okay. Okay!” Arith nodded to Blackberry, who was draped in a number of those fiendish weapons, then Limelight. “I can do this! I can't do this. I can and must do this!”

“Good luck.” said Blackberry.

“Just be yourself, and tell him what you had to do to get here.” said Limelight. “If he doesn't believe you, I have a song that says otherwise.”

“And I have the scars to prove it.” Blackberry looked to her bandaged leg, then back to Arith. “He would have to be a fool to reject you.”

“Thanks.” Arith smiled. “Okay.”

Arith went on alone, feeling more and more confident with each step. The rock farm had seen some repairs, and a Pony sat under a leafless tree just past the fence. She walked under the tree, and shared a smile with the Earth Pony buck sitting there. He had a golden-brown coat, and a white mane.

“H-Hello, it great to finally meet you. ” said Arith.

“Good to meet ya too.”

“You wouldn't believe what I went through to get here.”

“I think I might. I see where the Pumpkin handle came from, fits your coat and mane.”

“Oh, yeah. My name's Arith, by the way. So why do you call yourself Destiny?”

“I don't. I'm Shadow.”

“What?”

“I got here way before you, and already got caught.” The buck sat up, revealing chains on his hindlegs tethering him to a thick tree root. “Sorry.”

“Hey there, Pumpkin! So glad you made it.” A mare's voice came from behind Arith.

Arith turned, and saw a tall Unicorn mare with a cream coat and red mane. She brandished a pistol and leather armor.

“Y-You're Destiny?”

“That's one of my aliases, yes.”

“Uh, are you gonna let me go?” asked Shadow. “Like you said you would.”

“No.”

He shrugged. “Worth a shot.”

“What– I don't get it.” Arith said, her brow twisting with the fluctuation of her emotions.

“Listen.” said the Pony formerly known as: Destiny. “I am going to sell the both of you as slaves.”

“You were just using me? You never wanted to be friends?”

“Oh, don't get me wrong. I wanted to be friends, but only to get at you and your entire Stable. I was going to wait until I could sneak a virus into your system, but then you decided to come meet me!”

Shots fired in the near distance, from the homestead, and Destiny grew quiet. He kept his gun trained on Arith's skull until the sound died. It was a few minutes later that Blackberry and Limelight came running out the homestead.

“Stop right there!” Destiny said. “Or I'll shoot.”

Arith's companions stopped.

“Now drop your guns. Now!”

“You wont kill her, you wouldn't have gone through all this trouble to go empty hoofed.” Blackberry said.

“She is going to take me back to the Stable, where I'm going to pillage and enslave the whole population, or I'm gonna kill her and rip the information off her PipBuck. So I'm only gonna say it once more. Drop your guns.”

Reluctantly, Blackberry dropped the dozen or so guns she currently carried.

“Please don't.” Arith said with tears welling in her eyes.

“Oh, don't cry. There are worse things than being a slave.”

“NO! I don't care why, but please don't tell me you'll take my whole Stable. Just take me– Just tell me you wanted me specifically.” Arith's tears flowed.

“What!?” Destiny was taken aback.

“Here. I brought these for you.” She presented him with the bouquet.

His eyes widened at the sight. “A-Are those flowers? I've never seen so many. I kinda... feel like a real tool right now. I don't know what to s–”

A viridian light enveloped and yanked the pistol from his mouth. A moment later, Blackberry was upon him and beating him senseless. It was soon obvious that he wouldn't be getting back up.

“I'm such an idiot.” said Arith.

“What?” said Limelight. “You were brilliant just now!”

“I was serious is all.” Arith's tears continued, as she buried her head in her hooves.

“Arith.” said Blackberry. “It's been nearly five hours and, with this injury, I'm not gonna make it back to the Stable in under an hour and a half. I want you.”

“Of course. I swore. My magic is yours until I make you Overqueen.”

Limelight made a face. “Is this really the time, Blackberry?”

“That's what you want, right?” Arith lifted her head to meet Blackberry's eyes.

Blackberry knelt, and wiped a tear from Arith's cheek. “No. I want you.” She smiled. “I want a proper date.”