World Skippin' (The Really Long, Convoluted Fetch Quest)

The train ride between Ponyville and Canterlot was more awkward than usual that day. The train was completely empty, save for two guards on opposite sides of the car door. One seemed more upbeat than the other, who was on the verge of collapsing on the cabin floor. Both held their pikes (which nearly stabbed through the ceiling) and stood still, not saying a single word. For most of the trip, the girls sat there quietly, occasionally looking out the window. Eventually the uncomfortable silence was broken.

"So why are you two here?" Twilight asked.

"You see, we heard that this train, conducted by a newbie, was leaving the station on 'Celestia's emergency business.' There was nothing else to do this morning, so we took it upon ourselves to investigate." The excited guard said.

"Oh."

'Great,' she thought to herself. 'Back to looking out the window.'

Twilight remembered back to the Gala, when it was an honor to go to Canterlot. Since she had gone there so many times with her friends, it was just another visit. Same train, same view out the window. Just as the situation seemed like it couldn't get any more boring, something incredible happened in the distance: one of the windmills caught aflame. The canvas on one of the blades spontaneously glowed red-hot for a moment, and then the windmill was no more, despite the efforts of some farmers to douse it. The main six watched in horror as heat took its toll, but the guards didn't move a muscle.

"Did you see that?" Pinkie commented.

"Is it really that hot outside?" Rarity added.

"Sure is, ladies." One of the guards said. "From what I hear, the reason it's so hot out is that the pegasi haven't gotten around to cloud placement this year, and now that it's so hot out, they don't want to."

"It's so hot out, they can't even make up for their own procrastination!" The other replied.

"Now you see, the only way I heard about why the weather is so unbearable lately is because we're too close to the sun."

"Do you know anything about meteorology?" The second guard heckled.

"Well, in case you didn't notice, I'm just a guard."

"That's beside the point. Heat waves are caused by high air pressure in a contained area and a lack of convective clouds."

'Now this,' Twilight thought. 'is a conversation I can work with!'

"In a way, your friend is right, though," Twilight chimed in. "It is the summer solstice. Our axis is tilted toward the sun right now."

He chattered onward for the rest of the ride, occasionally being interrupted or corrected by Twilight. The others either intently listened in or zoned out on the chair until they arrived at the Canterlot train station. When the doors opened again, the guards were the first to leave, the active one still rambling about the weather.

"..And then the end result is a continual build-up of-- oh, wait! Looks like we're here, Sherman. False alarm, nothing happened." The first guard remarked.

"Well, that's a relief. Guess we should head back to base."

"Hold on, Sherman. They never heard the end of my explanation..."

"Actually, that's fine," Rarity assured. "You can go off to wherever you need to be."

"Well, if you insist," he said, about to leave, "But either way, welcome to Canterlot!"

They stepped out of the train and into a strangely empty city, much like Ponyville before them. Those few brave souls that were out were hidden in shade or desperately running into cover.The scorching sun truly was a menace if it couldn't even spare these city folk.

"Y'know, Sugarcube, you really shouldn't just step out of character like that." Applejack warned.

Rainbow Dash agreed. "Yeah, Twilight, you really should know better by now. They're always watching..."