Sans Twilight

by kingfish

Rating: teen
Tags: Comedy, Slice of Life, Sex, Main 6, Drama, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 2827

Twilight is away on a diplomatic visit to Saddle Arabia and the Mane Six struggle to get along in her absence. Rated Teen for one vague sexual reference.

Twilight is on a two-week diplomatic visit to Saddle Arabia, and the others are not doing very well. Without a voice of reason in their midst, they suddenly struggle to solve even the simplest of problems. But if there is one thing that these ponies have taught us, it is that friendship can overcome anything.
Set between seasons 4 and 5.
Rated Teen for a single sexual reference.

Don't worry, I'm alive! Sorry I haven't gotten out anything for a while.

Translated to Esperanto here.

Published 2015-02-12 03:00:03 UTC
Last updated 2015-02-12 03:00:03 UTC

Sans Twilight

"Come on, Fluttershy, hurry up!" shouted Rainbow Dash, hovering several yards ahead of her friend impatiently. "I wanna get to the picnic before the world ends!"

"Oh," said Fluttershy demurely, "I'm sorry, Rainbow. Angel just doesn't want to move." She tried coaxing the aforementioned pet further forward using a quite vibrantly orange carrot as bait, but the bunny refused to budge from his chosen spot on the path. He pouted, closing his eyes and crossing his tiny forelegs across his chest. "Come on, Angel," said Fluttershy, waving the carrot in front of him. "If you come with us, I'll give you a nice, sweet carrot cake." For a moment the rabbit looked tempted, but he quickly resumed his pout.

"Oh, for Celestia's sake," groaned Rainbow Dash, performing what was approximately her 107th facehoof of the day. "Why did you have to bring that little monster with you, anyways?"

"He's not a monster," said Fluttershy without missing a beat. "He's really a very nice bunny. And I can't leave him at the cottage because Discord has the Rabbit Flu." She nuzzled the strongly reluctant Angel with a hoof, who leaned back in a desperate attempt to avoid the mare's touch without moving from the spot. "I don't want poor Angel to get sick, now do I?"

"You know Discord was just making that up to get out of the picnic, right?" said Rainbow Dash, landing next to her on the path.

"Well, if he told me he's sick, then I believe him," said Fluttershy confidently.

"Are you kidding?!" yelled Rainbow. "The last time he said he was sick, he almost got Twilight and Cadance killed! Plus he was doing all he could to take advantage of the fact that you weren't there to stop him!"

"Well, he's vulnerable after the incident with Tirek. I need to teach him that I still trust him, even after what happened."

"You might trust him," growled Rainbow Dash, turning around and taking off again, "but I don't." Rainbow went ahead and flew off toward the picnic, and after quite a bit of coaxing and dessert-promising, Fluttershy finally got Angel to hop in her saddlebag and followed Rainbow.

Fluttershy was the last pony to arrive at the picnic. Rarity was sitting on her red couch which she often brought for these outdoor gatherings. The others always made fun of her for being too prissy and vain to sit on the grass like them. But for the most part she usually ignored them, choosing to catch up on her "beauty sleep."

Applejack and Rainbow Dash were having yet another hoof-wrestling competition, which was honestly rather pointless as each mare won about half the time, as with most of their other contests. Twilight had once done a formal statistical analysis of their contests and claimed to have found no significant difference between the two mares in terms of number of wins. But of course, that never stopped them.

Pinkie Pie was the only one actively moving, constantly doing somersaults and flips, presumably to burn off her excess energy before sitting down to eat with the others. She had catered the event, and so most of the food contained quite a bit of a certain sweet ingredient that Pinkie Pie enjoyed above all else.

Twilight was not there that day. She had gone to Saddle Arabia the week before by request of Celestia for a diplomatic visit, mostly to introduce the citizens properly to the newest Princess of Equestria. She had been gone for a week already, and would be gone for another before she returned. The others had not been able to follow, but they mostly took it in stride. Except for Pinkie, of course, who cried as per the usual for friends going on trips.

Twilight had told them from the beginning that she would be unable to keep directly in touch due to Spike staying in Equestria to keep the castle running. If anything happened, she had said, the five mares would be quickly informed by a Guard messenger within the day. Pinkie naturally had a small freakout about not being able to talk with Twilight, but her friends had managed to console her and quiet her fears for the time being, taking extra care to keep her away from the mailbox.

As Fluttershy grew closer to the group, she undid her saddlebag and allowed Angel to hop out onto the ground. As the boingy sound of the bunny's hop reached her ears, Applejack jerked her head around, looking directly at the abomination.

"Oh, no," she said with dread. "She brought the rabbit." At the word "rabbit," all except Rainbow looked to Angel with various combinations of fear, disgust, and anger.

"Fluttershy," said Rarity with a forced smile, "why did you bring Angel? This was supposed to be an outing of friends." The pegasus was aghast.

"Is Angel not your friend, Rarity?" she asked.

"Well, th-th-that's not what I said," stuttered Rarity quickly. "It's just that, um—"

"Just that that varmint o' yers is evil incarnate!" finished Applejack. Fluttershy gasped.

"He is not! He's a very nice bunny who just happens to be a little spoiled."

"A little spoiled, my cutie mark!" retorted Applejack. "I've seen that critter gettin' inta my taters!"

"Well, I may have to have a talk with him, then," conceded Fluttershy. "But I couldn't leave him at home because Discord has the Rabbit Flu, and I don't want Angel—"

"'Rabbit Flu?!' Don't you go listenin' to his horseapples! Why, I have half a mind to go snag the Element of Honesty right back off the Tree, just so I can shove it up his fibbin' behind!" Applejack stopped her rant, then promptly looked very guilty.

"Aw, I'm sorry, 'Shy. I didn't mean to go off on ya. He just gets me into a tizzy sometimes."

"Apology accepted," said Fluttershy with a nod. "Now let's eat." The mares, aside from Rarity, each sat on the picnic blanket and reached into the basket to retrieve the food. Rarity levitated out a small crumpet and nibbled on it daintily, saying she was cutting back to improve her figure.

Fluttershy grabbed a daisy sandwich, dusting off the thin coating of sugar that Pinkie had sprinkled on it, then bit into it as well. She took a piece of carrot cake and offered it to Angel, who took it greedily and immediately began chowing down on the frosting-covered confection.

"Sho, Flu'ershy," said Pinkie around a donut, spewing crumbs everywhere as she spoke, "wha'sh goin' on wish you?"

"Well," the pegasus replied, "Angel's birthday is next week. Discord and I have bought gifts already and I was hoping that when Twilight got back from Saddle Arabia you'd all come to the party."

"Ooh, ooh!" shouted Pinkie, having swallowed her donut. She jumped around and waved her hoof frantically in the air like an eager schoolfilly. "Can I plan the party? Can I? Can I?"

"That's okay, Pinkie," said Fluttershy, "but we already have everything planned." Pinkie's huge grin promptly melted and she looked down at the ground.

"Awww."

"But don't worry," Fluttershy continued reassuringly, "you can plan the afterparty."

"Yay!"

"So you're gonna give that little demon a party?" said Rainbow Dash casually. "Kinda seems like a reward for his bad behavior."

"Rainbow, that's not nice."

"Yeah!" said Pinkie. "Fluttershy can raise him how she wants!"

"Thank you for helping me, Pinkie, but I don't need it."

"Well, I can't not take your side. We are played by the same voice actor!" said Pinkie as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

"What did you say?" asked Fluttershy, attempting to clean out her ear with a hoof.

"Oh, nothing!" Pinkie Pie said with a knowing smile.

"If I may butt in," said Rarity, "I'm afraid I'm inclined to agree with Rainbow Dash. Angel does tend to behave rather badly. I'm certain the fact that you spoil him doesn't help. I mean, I know how much you care for him, but sometimes a caretaker or guardian must be firm."

"I can be firm," Fluttershy insisted. "Don't you remember what happened with the breezies?"

"Yeah, but ya still ain't cracked down on Mister Fuzzy Demon Horns over there." Applejack pointed with a hoof to where Angel was apparently arguing with a squirrel barely half his size over a pile of acorns. Eventually, the rabbit swiped the entire pile for himself, casually holding the angry squirrel at bay with a hind leg while appearing very interested in the state of his claws. Finally, the squirrel got fed up and stormed off, presumably to find more acorns. Angel blew a raspberry in the other animal's general direction, then struggled to pick up and cart off all of the nuts.

"Maybe Angel found those acorns first," hypothesized Fluttershy.

"Ya see?" said Applejack. "If that rabbit killed a pony right in front o' ya, you'd convince yerself he was framed! Ya love him so much ya can't see what's right in front o' ya!"

"You're one to talk about being blinded by love, Miss Overprotective Sister," said Rainbow Dash.

"Now hold on a minute," said Applejack, turning on the cyan pegasus. "All I do is try an' protect Apple Bloom. That's completely different! Plus, my sister ain't a bully!"

"No, but your cousin is." Applejack gasped dramatically, staring at Rainbow open-mouthed. Her eyes narrowed and she poked a hoof at the other mare's chest.

"You take that back," she breathed. Rainbow matched her glare, but before she could say anything, she was interrupted by Rarity.

"Now Rainbow, let's not do anything rash. And besides..." She flipped her mane, twirling the purple coil with a hoof. "...it's not ladylike."

"Ladylike?!" shouted Rainbow and Applejack at the same time.

"And what the hay do you know about being ladylike?" shouted Rainbow Dash. "I know about your so-called 'Boring Taxes' drawer!" She smirked. "And let's just say it isn't so boring."

"How dare you?!" gasped Rarity. "You vowed never to speak of it!"

"Hey," she said with a shrug, "what can I say? I'm not the Element of Honesty."

The group quickly devolved into a storm of arguments. Some were minor, some were major, but all were debated with almost religious zeal. One mare would shout over the others, only for another to grow even louder to drown them out. Eventually, one would not have even been able to understand any of them. Fluttershy sat in the center of the storm, and eventually she had had enough.

"STOP!!!" she yelled with the full force of her lungs behind the shout. The arguments finally stopped, but Pinkie continued.

"And then I said, 'Cereal? Are you insane?'" Finally, the pink mare also concluded her discussion. All eyes turned to Fluttershy, regarding her with either guilt, anger, or confusion.

"What are we doing?" asked Fluttershy. "Why are we arguing so much? If Twilight were here she would be terribly disappointed." The mares all looked down in shame.

"Ah, hay," said Rainbow. "You're right, 'Shy. I'm sorry."

"And I as well," said Rarity.

"Me too," added Applejack.

"Me three!" finished Pinkie.

"Why are we arguing so much?" asked Rainbow.

"I believe I have some idea," said Rarity. "Do you remember how we acted when those ghastly vines were taking over Ponyville?"

"Ya mean the vines that Discord used to try and take over Equestria?" said Applejack with obvious emphasis.

"Yes, dear, but that's not my point. When we went into the Everfree Forest, we left Twilight in Ponyville, telling her that she needed to stay safe."

"Yeah," said Applejack, "and then we went inta the forest to find the Tree of Harmony. Yer point?"

"My point, Applejack, is that without Twilight, we were unable to be logical. We began falling apart. We kept arguing, and we were incapable of doing practically anything productive. Then after we saved Twilight from those grabby plant things, I told her; 'we're simply lost without you.' And I think that's what's happening here."

"Huh," said Rainbow Dash. "So, now that Twilight's out of the country..."

"We're all being meanie-pantses to each other!" finished Pinkie Pie forlornly.

"Without Twilight to be the voice of reason," continued Fluttershy, "we keep arguing about things we normally wouldn't."

"Twilight's kinda our glue," said Rainbow Dash. "And she's also the one that brought us together in the first place. Without her, I would only know Flutters and Pinkie."

"And I probably wouldn't be able to even go outside," added Fluttershy. "I was so shy before. I mean, I still am, but not as much. I can actually talk to strangers now, and I have you girls to thank for that."

"Most likely," said Rarity, "the only one I would know would be Applejack through our sisters. Although now that I think about it, Sweetie Belle and Apple Bloom didn't meet until after we did."

"Ooh! Ooh!" said Pinkie Pie. "I'd still know everypony!"

"Yeah," said Applejack, "ya prob'ly would. But shoot, if I'd never met ya'll, I'd still be workin' myself to death on the farm. You girls taught me it's good to get away from work for a while sometimes."

"And you taught me that life is more fun when you have other ponies to share it with," said Fluttershy.

"And you taught me that it's not cool to brag about stuff," said Rainbow Dash. "Even if that stuff is pretty awesome."

"And you taught me," said Pinkie in a rare moment of seriousness, "that sometimes it's okay to not spend all your time with your friends, and it's okay if you don't have enough time for all of them sometimes."

"And you taught me that generosity can go too far," concluded Rarity. "Let's face it; those Gala dresses I made with your specifications were atrocious." The other mares laughed at the memory.

"Even I know those things looked bad," said Applejack.

"Ain't that the truth," said Rainbow with a chuckle.

"See?" said Fluttershy. "Even without Twilight here, we're all still friends."

"Twilight may have brought us all together," agreed Rarity, "but we can still be self-sufficient in her absence."

"Friends can stay friends even without another friend to keep them friends," added Pinkie.

"Yeah!" said Rainbow. "We don't need Twilight to be our glue, 'cause we're our own glue. Friends stick together no matter what, even if they're not all in one place."

"Group hug!" shouted Pinkie, somehow managing to tackle all four of the other mares simultaneously, despite their being separated by up to three yards. She pulled them all in towards her, wrapping both her forelegs around the group and nestling them in a strong group hug. The other mares each leaned into the embrace, even Rarity, for once oblivious to the dirt on Pinkie's coat. They sat there for several seconds, basking in their friends' affection, before breaking the hug and falling into a loose pile.

"Man," said Rainbow Dash. "I can't wait until Twilight gets back!"

One week later...

Twilight stepped off the carriage and onto the dirt road, emphatically greeting the five mares and baby dragon eagerly awaiting her arrival. The dragon ran up to the alicorn and immediately grabbed her in a tight hug, nuzzling the fur on her leg. After a surprised moment she reached a hoof down and patted his head lovingly.

"Twilight, you're back!" shouted Pinkie Pie excitedly.

"Of course I'm back, Pinkie," said Twilight, chuckling. "You were told when I'd be arriving; it's not like it's a surprise."

"Of course it is, Twilight! We thought you'd never be back! Well I say 'we' but I really mean 'I' because I'm the only one who was making any sense everypony else said you'd be back but I was scared you'd get hurt or lost or something even worse and I told Rarity but she just said I was making a big deal out of nothing..."

The pink mare continued on her tirade, and Twilight looked to the other four behind her. Rainbow Dash shrugged and gave her a look that said, "Hey, we did all we could." Finally, Twilight put a hoof on Pinkie's mouth, stopping her in the middle of a rant about peanut butter and jelly.

"Pinkie," she said, "I'm here now! You don't have to worry about me getting lost." She hugged the mare, then ushered the others in. They all crowded around Twilight, sandwiching her in the center of the ponypile.

"I'm so happy to be home!" said Twilight. "I missed you girls so much!"

"We missed you too, Twi!" said Rainbow Dash. Eventually the mares and dragon all pulled out of the group hug and started walking toward Twilight's castle.

"I'm so eager to catch up!" said Twilight. "So what all did you girls do while I was away?" The other mares all looked at each other meaningfully, and finally Rainbow Dash turned to Twilight and replied.

"Let's just say we solved a problem with friendship."