How Love Kills

Opportunity Alpha

        A pony, Equestrian in origin, slowly woke up to the gentle tones of his room’s wake up protocol. It was a series of gentle, long notes that would slowly play one after another until he got up. This was a day he had been waiting anxiously for.

        His name was Ut Daret. In a language known as Latin in most variations of Earth, it translates to “to give life.” This was the name he chose for himself after joining the MDP. Many life forms change their names when coming to New Pandora. Some do this to leave their previous life behind them, others may have already planned on doing so but didn’t have the time to fill out the paperwork in their homeworld, but most do it because their birth name is hard to pronounce.

        For Officer Daret, it was the first reason. His previous life was no longer relevant to his interests. He no longer needed to hold himself to the standards of his old society, feeling comfort in the open minded community of New Pandora. He felt that, as long as he lived here, his previous life didn’t matter. He was Ut Daret, plain and simple.

        He got up from his bed. Beds were common, but this was a bed given to him in preparation for an assignment. For the best possible sleep, a New Pandorian would get a sleeping pod. This pod would suspend them in midair with quantum locking (quantum levitation if you prefer the less accurate term,) and uses lights that help the subject have a more soothing sleep, as well as soft music, and small traces of nitrous oxide. This is good for sleep, meditation, and self hypnosis, but isn’t available in most universes. So, whether out of preference, necessity, or paranoia, many choose to sleep in a bed. For Ut Daret, it was mostly a bed meant to simulate the beds that exist in the world his next mission takes place in.

However, he also didn’t want to distract himself with a machine that he found rather… stimulating. It’s common knowledge Ut Daret has a hypnosis fetish, hence why he isn’t sent on missions involving psychic life forms.

        Ut Daret was preparing himself for a rather strange assignment. Strange compared to previous ones that is. He was an Alicorn, a tall unicorn with wings and a proficiency in magic. His mane was a long blonde that complimented his light grey coat. His birthplace was a world where the population consisted mostly of Alicorns, with the only exception being lesser quadrupeds, like buck and goats. For all previous assignments, he was sent to universes of similar structure. But the Equestria he was going to didn’t have many Alicorns. In fact, Alicorns were worshipped as gods in this particular world. They used their powerful magic to dictate the position of the stars, the phases of the moon, and even the orbit of the sun. Needless to say, the laws of physic vary from universe to universe.

        With all this in mind, why not assign a more fitting species to the mission? There were plenty of Earth Ponies, Unicorns, and Pegasi to choose from. And even if this assignment required diplomacy, there were other Alicorns with much more experience in royal espionage. Ut Daret didn’t see himself as a politician, making his assignment even more strange. But his superiors said that he was the ideal choice, and that all his questions would be answered at the workplace.

        After getting up, Daret walked out of his room, and into the living room. It was your standard New Pandora living room, although it was made bigger to accommodate for his flatmate.

Said flatmate was a species called Audrey II. He was a sizable pod plant, resembling a venus fly trap, but with teeth similar to the Piranha Plants of the Mushroom Kingdom. He was as tall as the walls of the apartment, approximately 3.048 Meters, or 10 feet, in height.

        If you are familiar with his species, you may have seen a musical in which he was the main villain. This is a common occurrence. In the vast infiniteness of the Multiverse, what is fiction in one world is fact in another. With that said, his species becoming associated with the MDP is a story of its own.

        After conquering the human race of his universe, they looked for new worlds to feed off of. Normally universal domination fell outside of MDP jurisdiction. However, one of the worlds on their list already made contact with us. One universe filled with hemovore plantations is fine, but a multiverse invasion is prohibited. So we offered a new lifestyle for them. Several negotiations, and a few scientific inventions later, the Audrey II’s were provided symbiotic synthetics to provide all the blood they need. After neutering them first of course, letting them grow out of control is just asking for trouble.

        The Audrey II that lived with Ut Daret decided on the name Big Babba. Like many species, Audrey II’s don’t need names. They’re all essentially clones of the same base plants, and generally think the same way. But since names are commonplace in New Pandora, and referring to individuals by their species name is considered rude, Big Babba begrudgingly agreed to be given a fitting name.

        “Mornin’ Derry.” The former threat to all mankind greeted. “I don’t suppose you have any more info about that mission of yours?”

        Ut Daret wasn’t all that satisfied with the nickname his new friend gave him, but went with it anyway. “Nothing. But if it turns out I’m supposed to do some political stuff for a species that worships my kind, expect me to turn it down and spend some more quality time with you.”

        He chuckled. “Come on, politics isn’t that hard. Look at me! I’m a representative for my whole species, and you don’t hear me complaining.” He was always making himself out to be perfect.

        “Your entire species thinks the same way you do, of course it’s easy. But me? If I go to that world, those damn primitives will worship me like a god and expect me to keep their world safe from celestial beings.”

Daret had a particular stigma towards life forms of low intelligence. He considered it to be a major turn off. Not that he was looking for a relationship or anything, but he’d prefer to be around life forms that at least knew the basics of quantum mechanics, or how to write poetry, or even life forms who dare to believe that there is no afterlife, making immortality preferable to oblivion.

        “What’s wrong with worship? Isn’t that what Procedure Sigma is for?” Big Babba asked.

        He gave Big B. a condescending look. “Not every specimen who follows Procedure Sigma goes to a world where they are worshiped as gods. If anything, that’s one of the more dangerous choices to go with. And it may seem fun, but having the fate of the world on your shoulders is extremely stressful.”

        Big B. grabbed a television remote from a nearby table. “Like you would know. My ancestor had to go through a lot to make sure we took over Earth. It was only through sheer luck that that stupid human discovered our taste for blood. It was a classic survival of the fittest scenario. We were a dying species before he took action. My kind would have gone extinct if he didn’t go to the right place at the right time.” He turned on the TV to his favorite channel. “And as a clone of that very same plant, I can tell you that, as stressful as that kind of task may be, the reward is well worth the pain.”

        Daret sighed in defeat. “I guess I can’t argue with experience. Doesn’t mean I’ll take the assignment though.” He glanced at the TV to see a fight scene between two Mobius Hedgehogs. Big Babba always enjoyed stories with lots of action. “Still a fan of those hedgehogs I see.”

        “You know it.” He said with pride. “These guys know how to fight. Nature’s very best vs a scientist’s very worst. Magic artifacts, robots powered by animals, and worldwide jeopardy? This is definitely in my top ten.”

        Ut Daret payed attention to the design of the world they were fighting in. “Don’t the environments look more geometric?”

        “You’re talking about places like Green Hill, not every location looks the same.”

        “I know.” He said. “I just find Green Hill to be appealing to the eye. And also ironic considering the central theme of that place is nature. Makes Robotnik's plans to fill the world with machines look like not much of a change in comparison.”

        Babba put a vine to his chin in contemplation. “I always did wonder what it would be like to be one of those Green Hill plants. What with all the spinning petals and shifting stems. Not sure if they’re dancin’ or warding off prey.” He giggled a bit. “They’re kinda cute.”

        Ut Daret smiled at that comment, going into the kitchen to prepare himself breakfast. Eating in New Pandora was unnecessary, unless an MDP officer has to spend several days in another dimension. He familiarized himself with Equestrian cuisine several weeks ago. It wasn’t much different from the food of his homeworld. All he had to do was remove all traces of magic plants and incorporate a few apples and flowers into his former diet, and he was ready. Meat was also optional, but most Equestrians prefer a vegetarian diet. Take the food he was making for breakfast for example. It was a classic eggs, bacon, and pancakes breakfast from his homeworld, minus the bacon. He was able to substitute it with hay fries, a snack food he still had yet to fully understand.

        As the pancake batter was put into his skillet, Ut Daret tried to calm himself with the knowledge that, if he was really the ideal choice for this assignment, maybe the world he was being sent to wouldn’t be in any major danger. As long as Discord stays a good guy, Luna keeps herself in good terms with her sister, the windigoes are kept at bay, the smooze doesn’t come back, Sombra doesn’t come back…

        Yeah, this assignment was going to be a stressful one.