Authors note: I would love to have some constructive criticism because this is my first attempt at writing ANYTHING. I’d also like to point out that I’m going to start it off out of order; it will start out at the middle and lead in to the beginning to show how it got to what it is; you will be clueless, so to speak, for a short time because I will be writing from different points of view. Anyhow, I would like to know what I need to improve on so hit me up in the comments!
Calm, and silence only interrupted by the occasional sound of leaves rustling in the trees from the soft cool wind. ‘Darkness... no, blindness… No, my eyes are closed!’ the filly thought to herself while trying to open them but lacking the strength to do so. She decided to try and get up. The filly didn’t need to put any weight on that hoof. The sheer amount of pain that ran through her body made her eyes shoot open and let a pain filled scream out into the night. She is awake now. She knows she isn’t going anywhere any time soon. Now feeling the all injuries she had sustained, she cried from the new wave of pain the gripped her body.
‘CRACK!’ The filly froze. She went silent from pure fear, tears still streaming down her face because the pain had not ceased. She trembled uncontrollably. Somepony or something was out there the filly thought to herself.
While franticly trying to locate the source of the sound the filly had a chance to look at her surroundings. She was in a clearing on a hill in the middle of a moonlit forest. The hilltop is for the most part treeless, though a few trees did dare to grow past the tree line, but they were smaller than the others. The grass had black patches in it. It had been burnt. ‘No wait a minute…’ the filly thought as her eyes were following a line of missing earth that to her disbelief led straight to her.
“Eeep!” The filly squeaked realizing she had let her guard down. She heard hoofsteps to her left. She turned to face what she could only guess was a pony but then again she didn’t know. It was too dark to see the pony but now she could tell by its body shape it was a pony. As the mysterious pony neared the filly could start to make out details. It was a purple unicorn mare. The mare looked beat up. Her mane was dark blue, with a purple and pink highlight in it.
The unicorn was angry. The purple mare walked up to the helpless filly and stopped to gaze down upon her. The filly looked into her eyes. There was only rage and there was no sign of mercy.
The unicorn’s horn started to glow. The filly curled up into a ball, ignoring the pain that worsened from her doing so. The filly looked back up desperately trying to say something but it was to no avail being paralyzed by the mortal terror that gripped her.
“Please don’t hurt me” she finally managed to say and immediately afterwards bracing herself for the strike that was sure to follow. And the silence.
The mare gasped coming back to reality. “What happened” the mare said oblivious to the filly in front of her.
“I don’t kno—“ cried the filly before coughing up a fairly large amount of blood. She realized her injuries were worse than she thought.
“Are you Ok?” exclaimed the purple mare reaching out to help the ailing filly.
“STAY BAC—“yelled the filly before coughing up more blood. She could tell the unicorn meant well now but she wasn’t taking that chance. Her vision started to get blurry and her eyelids became heavy. The filly could hear the mare talking but couldn’t make out the words anymore.
Growing tired and losing strength she let her head fall. Unable to see she didn’t know whether the mare was still there or not. But then with the last of her strength she said “I don’t want to die” and then everything went dark and faded into silence.
Note: This is the shortest chapter by far(it seemed longer when I wrote it.. I will Post by Wednesday.
