Wakey Bakey Eggs and Abortion

Prologue

It started off on a cool Tuesday in the middle of Summer. I was taking my evening drive to work when I ran over a lamp. I noticed that I got wishes from it if I rubbed it. I then jacked off all over it. When I reached my climax an Arabic popped out, and I gave it a pearl necklace. I then raised my fists in the air and exclaimed "360 naw-scawp." The Arab man then shouted in Arabic. A thought rose to my mind, "This man may be Isis" so I pointed my border patrol rifle at him. Assuming defeat, he spoke English like he should. He said that he would give me 3 wishes, so my first wish was to be a time traveler, my second wish was to have a chili-cheese sandwich. Then I searched the mind for my deepest desire, I told the Arabic man "I want to go to Equestria." The Arabic man started shouting again, so I shot off his testicles. Gooping up his balls in my mouth I gargled his sweaty testies. The taste of salt and blood satisfied me, and the hint of gun smoke fueled my erection. The man then accepted my hopes and dreams, and so I was teleported to Equestria. Thus began my rain of dildos.