Diary of a Dragon

Chapters

Entry #1
Entry #3
Entry #4
Entry #6
Entry #7
Entry #9
Entry #11
Entry #12
Entry #13
Entry #14
Entry #15
Entry #16
Entry #18
Entry #19
Entry #21
Entry #23
Entry #24
Entry #25
Entry #26
Entry #27
Entry #28
Entry #30
Entry #31
Entry #2
Entry #5
Entry #8
Entry #10
Entry #17
Entry #20
Entry #22
Entry #29

Entry #1

Things are very weird around here recently. And that coming from a dragon who's living with ponies. The book "Your diary and you" Twilight made me read said I should introduce myself. Well, I'm Spike, I'm a dragon and sixteen years old at the moment. Twilight, who I mentioned earlier, would be kind of my mom. Not really my mom but in some way she is, I think? Princess Celestia tried to explain it to me but I'm not a magical prodigy like Twilight. She said my egg was a fake and that Twilight in her magical surge made it real or something like that. I'm just glad to be alive, if I'm honest. I love Twilight and she cares for me. I'm good with that. Even if she is a slave driver from time to time.

But let me tell you why I started writing to you in the first place. My mom got engaged a few days back. To one of her friends. Another mare. And now, Applejack, is somehow my step mom. Step dad? I never had a father but a father should be male. So I guess I have two moms now. I said it was weird and I don't fully understand everything just yet. Well, I know of the birds and the bees, but I don't know how two mares would... No, not even thinking about that.

Am I happy for them? Certainly. I have experience being in love, or in having a crush, and I know the happy feeling that you feel when you're around that pony you have eyes for. I just wished I had as much success as them. You see, I kind off confessed my love a few years ago. And I got shut down hard. But that was kind of unavoidable, that I know today. Rarity and I just don't have that much in common. And of course there is the age thingy. The only thing we two really had in common was our love for gems. She likes to wear them and put them in her dresses, for she is a designer, and I love to eat them. If I think about it, that also could have been a major point for quarrels if things had gone differently. I know how angry she got when I used to steal a gem or two while I was helping her from time to time. Not so pretty.

At the moment guards are running all around Ponyville Castle. We had many names back when it was new, but non of them really stuck. Rainbow Dash wanted to call it the "Rainbow Castle of Awesomeness". Pinkie Pie wanted to call it "Friendship Castle" and Discord suggestion was "White Castle". Which was weird because it isn't even really white, more like a really bright pink. My proposal, "Fortress of Friendship", was also shut down. So like Canterlot castle, it was named after the city it was in. Fine by me, but "Fortress of Friendship" would have been so much cooler.

Back to the guards. Their carrying in Applejacks stuff over from Sweet Apple Acres. She is moving in with us today. We talked about it a few days ago at breakfast. The farm isn't so far away that Applejack can't just walk there every morning. Not like shes hasn't done that the past two years. I'm a dragon, I notice if someone is in my territory and enters or leaves it. Also, they weren't especially silent. Thank Celestia that with the castle I got my own room. And a bed. So, yeah, Applejacks moving in and the guards walk all over the place. With dirty hooves. And even if I don't have to help carry stuff, I know who is cleaning the entire day tomorrow because someone isn't keen on hiring a staff. Like one or two maids would kill us.

So, that's what's happening in my life at the moment. Please tell me I'm not the only one thinking this is totally weird.

Entry #3

I'm so happy right now. I have a mother and... Twilight called me her son! I can't write. Manly pride is good, as Shining said, but not for paper.

Entry #4

Things got livelier in the castle. With Twilight and Applejack marrying in fall, I learned today that I will have a sister-in-law. Apple Bloom. Applejack brought her over today so we could hung out a bit. It's not like we don't know each other, but with me being a few years older we never really did anything together. Hence that one time the Crusaders tried to get a dragon taming cutie mark.

I hadn't seen her for a while. She was busy learning to be a carpenter and I managing the library. Like always.

I will spent the rest of my days doing that, won't I?

So we sat there on the couch, watching the table getting dusty. Apple Bloom hadn't really changed that much over the last few years. Of course she got bigger, and in the right places too. She also switched her bow for a maneband, much like her sister. But besides that, still the Apple Bloom I know. After the awkward silence time was over, we talked a bit about live. And by that I mean about hers. Apparently, filly fooling runs in the family. She is together with Scootaloo and they rented out a small apartment in the town together. Big Macintosh and Fluttershy had a foal a year ago, that I knew of course, but I didn't that Apple Bloom took that as a cue to move out. I mean, she is younger than me. It was normal for ponies to start learning a job at fourteen, but... I don't know. I felt left behind somehow. As if I missed my cue. They started dating, learning jobs and I was sitting here, dusting off books and that was it. In the end I didn't even know what I could even tell Apple Bloom about my life besides that my mum was getting married to her sister. I don't think she knew that.

She must have noticed that somehow, because Apple Bloom said she and Scootaloo would go to a little party at the lake this weekend. Some other colts and fillies would come too and she asked if I wanted to join them. How do they say? There is always space for a fifth wheel.

Twilight. That's another topic on my mind recently. We talked, a lot. She never told she would visit Half Mind too, but she did. And the old mare did to her the same thing she did to me. She got her thinking. I don't know what questions she asked her, but the evening she came home she hugged me like there was no tomorrow. I didn't mind. It felt pretty great actually. She called me her son for the first time ever, I think. I always was her faithful assistant as she had been Celestias faithful student. I was the number one assistant, the dragon she could depend on. But now, we are mother and son. I always thought about her as my mum but finally saying it is different somehow.

Since then we hugged a lot, we talk more and so on. And I can finally say it: "You know, mothers, right?"

I think my life has taken a turn for the better.

Entry #6

So, the big party was yesterday. I would have loved to write about it the same evening, but I didn't get home earlier. Someone spiked the punch. After it got found out and everypony was finished with the game "laugh at the dragons name" it was a pretty good evening. Well better than good actually...

The party location was as this little lake near Sweet Apple Acres. Legend has it that it was created by a stupid unicorn who combined two spells without really knowing what he was doing. It exploded in his face and left this lake as a reminder. How much of that is true I don't know, but I know they managed to decorate the place very nice. They were lanterns in the threes, small wooden rafts with candles on it n the water and some magical fireflies were conjured. Someone even managed to separate Pinkie Pie from her new gramophone for music. And they had the mind to only take that and not her vinyls. Pinkie is a great mare and has a great sense for taste if it comes to baked goods but her taste in music is just bad. Really, really bad. You think the pony polka was bad back in the day? You have no idea.

Also nearly every teen of Ponyville was here. What mostly just was Miss Cheerilee's old class. Even Sweetie Belle. This party was for her, as I found out later.

Mom, if you're reading past this point I'm gonna smoke next to your books for the rest of the week.

Remember when I told you about how well Apple Bloom has grown out? Yeah, now double that and forget it again because it's still nothing compared to Sweetie Belle. Like Apple Bloom I hadn't seen her in a while. But this was because she lived with her singing teacher in Canterlot for the last two years and this was her first day back. She isn't buffed like Apple Bloom or trained slender muscles like Scootaloo, but graceful slender and at the same time so well toned. I just really couldn't get my eyes off her. At first I didn't really wanted to talk to her, but Apple Bloom pulled her over and yeah. Sweetie Belle isn't the high pitched, gullible foal she once was. Her mind matured as much as her body, but at the same time she was still just Sweetie Belle. Still the casual, carefree and day dreaming mare she always was. But now she could sing, had the body of a goddess and knew how to move her flanks.

Me and Sweetie danced half the night away and the other we drank. When we talked, we talked about her training, compared our experiences of Canterlot or about comics. As it turned out, Sweetie Belle loved comics. She told me she started reading them years ago because she was trying to get some stupid colt to notice her. What a stupid colt. His loss. I never met a mare before that knew so much about the power ponies.

I don't know when, but at some point we passed out because of the alcohol. As I woke up it was already morning and quite chilly. I could tell from the little frost on the grass. It was still early spring after all. Sweetie Belle had slept next to me, what I hadn't even noticed at first. I woke her up too. She thanked me for keeping her warm - still dragon - and rushed back to the boutique. She was living with Rarity now.

I don't remember when I visited the boutique last. I never had a reason after I was let down. But now I think I will have to. Hearts and Hooves is only a few days away. Maybe I ask Applejack for advice. She managed to get Twilight to notice her after all. Twilight.

Entry #7

I finally got a hold of Applejack today. The last few days were kind of like a walk through Tartarus, so maybe I shouldn't complain. Also, they did't notice I was gone whole other night and I don't planning on telling them.

First there were the reporters, who somehow got wind of the engagement. I don't know how Shining and Cadance had done it, but they were all over the castle the whole time. Some even flew up to take some pictures through the windows. Well, they tried. Mum gave me the OK to use my flames on them if they don't stay off the property. Lucky for us, they didn't know that would probably just send them to princess Celestia. Actually, wouldn't that be worse?

The second thing is, that it's spring. The busiest time for a farmer next to late fall. Applejack and Big Mac had so much to do, they slept in the barn the other day. So when Applejack came back this evening, I could finally ask her about Sweetie Belle.

Well, I didn't told her that I like Sweetie. I told her that I just kind of know this mare that I happen to like and that I wanted to ask her out on hearts and hooves day. She tried to sent me to the expert in romance, who helped her woo Twilight. Yeah Rarity wasn't really an option. And she got a bit angry as I answered her, why I tried to ask her instead of my mom. "Well, between you and Twilight, you're more dad material than her", was apparently the wrong answer. I should remember that. I kind off saved myself with an explanation that boys don't generally like to talk about love with their mothers. Which is the honest truth.

So she gave me the same hint Rarity had given her. "Its Twilight we're talking about. She is a very smart mare but can be pretty obvious to the simpler things in live. So mare up and just tell her in the face."

Yeah, I'm not gonna do that.

Twilight and Applejack know each other for years and were close friends. The first applied to me and Sweetie as well, but friends? No, I don't think so. She was just Raritys little sister all the time. Thinking about it. That will get a little weird, won't it? At least it fits nicely in my recent life then.

Entry #9

Apple Bloom came over today. She asked me some weird questions. Or maybe it was more her behavior that was weird. She asked how I liked the party among other things. I think she tried to hint at something. If that's true, she is as bad at it like her sister. How does Applejack tell her friends something is wrong? By running away of course. OK, that was this one time and they all were younger, barely adults.

And I just had the thought; Does she know? Does Apple Bloom know that I did take a liking to Sweetie Belle? The only pony who actually knows I have a crush is Applejack and... damn. She does. Applejack can't hold a secret if her live would depend on it. To give her credit, she doesn't tell the secret, but her face does. You just have to guess and see her reactions. So Apple Bloom knows at least I have a crush on somepony. As if I needed more pressure.

Topic change. Night Hawk and Iron Heart are cool. They are both nice mares and they are easy to talk with, well, because they answer you. Never had a guard in Canterlot doing that. Night Hawk comes from a little town in the mountains between the Crystal Empire and Equestria. She told me it was nice there. A lot of thestrals and stuff. I would like to hear more about that in the future. Stories about mighty thestral stallions in battle armor swinging war axes twice their size. Conquering other countries and ponynapping only the most beautiful of mares for breeding. It were different times back then. "Why do you think all of us thestral mares are so beautiful and strong? Because we have only the best genes of course!" Her words, not mine.

Iron heart is pegasus through and through. Prideful and cocky. But she is really smart too if it comes to medicine. She actually was trained to be a field medic, but with no war, there is no need for one. So she tried to get stationed in some quite town were she can get away with doing her thing, as she put it. It's only me, or does she remind me of a younger Rainbow Dash? I mean, today she is the hard working Wonderbolt but back when we first met...
Well, I'm cool with it. They guard the door when we have our opening hours and then they can do what they want. That are what? Four or five hours of guarding a single door and then they are off duty. Maybe I could enlist. It sounds pretty laid back.

Supplement:
I just woke with a really awesome idea to ask out Sweetie for Hearts and Hooves day. Or on Hearts and Hooves day. It's a bit risky but I think it would leave an impression. Just hope it will be a good one. I don't know if you were the real deal, but thanks princess Luna.

Entry #11

Sorry that I didn't wrote over the last few days, but I got a bit in trouble. Let's just say that I forgot that I'm a dragon. I know, very hard to believe.

So, as I said, I had this pretty neat idea on how to ask Sweetie Belle out. I found a book on historical thestral armor in our library and decided to build a replica. We even had everything I needed at home. It didn't cost me a single bit. So I made a rough blue print on how I had to form the scrap metal in the basement and started to put it together until it resembled what I had in mind.

And I have to say, I did pretty well. Twilight didn't answer when I asked for her opinion, because she was still pretty pissed, but I could see it in her eyes. She scanned the armor for every detail and she has to admit that I got pretty close to the real deal.

What totally slipped my mind was, again, that I'm a dragon. And I made an suit of armor for a pony. Who walks on four legs and not two. So I had to walk on my claws half the day. It wasn't bad and I know that someday I will always have to do that, its just... they get so dirty! How can these ponies stand that? Of course they wipe their hooves before entering a building or clean them before they sit down and eat but come on! On a rainy day that has to be Tartarus! But besides that, it wasn't that bad. And I had a very nice view the whole time. With me finally being a bit bigger, my eyes were just on the right high when on all four.

So, how did I end up in jail? After Mom and Applejack left for their Hearts and Hooves Day date, I got into the armor I made and went over to Carusel Boutique, barged through the front door, roared as loud as I could and went up the stairs. I found Sweetie Belles room pretty easy. She and Rarity both were asleep until I roared, so when I entered Sweeties room she was just sitting up in bed and looked at me with sleepy eyes. With her wild mane that was damn sexy. So I grabbed the mare, climbed out of her window and got on the roof.

Sweetie was still pretty sleepy but got awake very fast when she saw how high we actually were. I roared again and spat my fire in the air to make everything authentic as possible. Then I yelled "Ich bin ein dummer Drache!" as loud as I could. After all, I was a thestral warrior at the moment who just claimed a mare for breeding. Not that I would have done that to Sweetie! I would never hurt her!

Just in the moment I wanted to start climbing down, set Sweetie down in front of her home and ask her if the lady would like to get something to eat with the mighty warrior that I was, the police showed up. And guess what, after two dragon attacks on the city they decided to invest in a dragon emergency program. Also known as a unicorn who knows shock spells. So instead of climbing down they yanked Sweetie Belle out of my claws and zapped me. The next thing I know, jail. A whole day because my guardian was away in Canterlot.

And now I'm not only grounded, they also think I was actually after Rarity and with me not having a date on Heart and Hooves Day they thought I became greedy again. And I can't even tell them otherwise because I would have to explain not only to Twilight and Applejack, but also to Rarity, Sweetie Belle and the police that I have a crush on Sweetie Belle, what is pretty weird because I had a crush on Rarity in the past! Sucks to be me I guess...

Entry #12

Still grounded. They didn't even give me a hint when I'm allowed outside of the castle again. I also lost some of the bits I had saved up to pay for the door of the boutique. Apparently I smashed into the door so hard I destroyed the lock. I hadn't even thought about that.

Also, mum is onto me. I know she knows something. I hid my diary, so she couldn't read it again but Applejack surely told her something. I can even imagine it. Both of them lying in bed, totally doing nothing besides that and playing twenty guesses. Well, mum would play, Applejack would be just there and try not to spill the beans. Should have made her Pinkie promise. The armor is also kind of a give away that there was something more behind my "little stunt", as they call it these days.

But that is not even the worst thing. I was in the local paper. Luckily without picture and on page two, but it still managed to get attention. Some worried citizens came during opening hours and asked mum if she thinks if it's save to house a dragon in city proper. Maybe I'm not the only dragon. Mum got so angry that I mistook her for one for a few seconds. They ran with tails between their legs. Nice to know that she still has my back though.

But with the much more free time I have lately, I had time to think over my actions again. Funny, that's exactly what parents want to accomplish with grounding their foals, isn't it? Anyway, I think that I came on a little strong. And I admit I did't come to that conclusion on my own. I searched the library for a book on dating advises. It has some solid stuff in it and I think I will give some of it a try. But first, I have to apologize to Sweetie Belle and Rarity. I think I scared Sweetie pretty hard and Applejack told me Rarity wanted to have some serious words with me.

Well, I leave it at that for today. Applejack made dinner. Smells pretty good.

Entry #13

You know, I always wanted to Rarity to look at me.

But not like that!

I went to the boutique today to apologize. With Applejack just behind me to make sure I don't wander off. It went good enough, I think. Well, Rarity opened the door, took a look at me and just glared me down. She asked Applejack if we could speak alone. I was lucky that Sweetie was out, because RARITY KNEW! She knew everything! She even knew of the party. The only way she could knew I know of is that Sweetie told her. Why would she do that?

So I was pretty much done for from the start.

I apologized like I had planned and told her that in my stupid - she made me promise to add this word - dragon head all made much more sense and sounded really good. I don't really know how dragons actually find love, but I think it can't be that much different. Do they at all? I can't imagine that two dragons just meet up and ask the other one of she wants any hatchlings.

So she knew I had a thing for her little sister. Surprisingly, she wasn't even really mad about that. She even told me it made sense. I can't see how but she said so. Rarity just wanted to know why I like her. Well, she knew anyway so I told her that it had made, click, as they say at the party. At least for me that is. And that I had this big idea about being a mighty warrior, conquering his princess on hearts and hooves day and so on. She said she would found it "sweet" if her shop did't had to suffer under that idea. Then she told me that Sweetie was out with her friend, which she also didn't had seen for a few months (Scoots and Apple Bloom visited her from time to time in Canterlot) and I should come back later to talk to her. I will do that.

Just two words. Apple Bloom. I thought my day was over, but no. Not only Rarity knew, Apple Bloom figured it out too. She came over after her meetup with Sweetie Belle to go on my nerves. Sweetie had told her what had transpired and she couldn't stop laughing. Well, I've gone a little over board but that was just mean. Thanks to "Romance for Dummies" I now know that a simple card and some flowers would have been better. And what I did would be more something for a long married couple who needed to bring back some swing into their relationship. See! I'm learning. Jeez. Give a dragon a break.

Entry #14

I still can't really believe it.

I still can't but I got date! I got my first date. I'll be back later, because I still haven't really progressed all of this.

So, OK. I'm down again, not jumping around and cool. So, yeah. I got my date with Sweetie! Still can't believe it but its true. I pinched myself and run my head into the wall to make sure. Mum wasn't really happy about the last one, because she was making a alchemy experiment and needed to concentrate.

I still don't know how I pulled that off. To think of it, didn't she ask me out?

Sweetie came over today to the castle. Rarity had told her I came by the other day when she was out and she was curious what I wanted. So I apologized again and asked her if she now was scared of me. The laugh I got as a answer was nice but hurt a little at the same time. I'm a dragon. They should fear me a little, shouldn't they?

No she wasn't scared of me and she wasn't really angry about the rough wake up call. She told she would have been angry if Featherweight had managed to take pictures of her with a very messy mane. Luckily he didn't. But then came the tough question. "What was that even all about?" I must have stammered like an idiot for something like minutes. And even before I could pull my thoughts together she added: "That wasn't about Rarity, was it?" Good thing I managed to shake my head. After that, she looked at the clock in my room and said she had a appointment and she actually planned to make this quick. So she asked if I wanted to further elaborate my story while we ate something together in Sugarcube Corner tomorrow for lunch. I nodded so hard my neck cracked a bit. And after that: "Well, it's a date!" And then she left.

I sat there for a few minutes and tried to put everything together what just happened. Sweetie Belle clearly used the word "appointment" for this other thing and then "date" for our... well date. Or I'm reading to much into this? This stupid book doesn't says anything about something like that!

I also have nothing to wear, my claws are way to sharp and I could polish my scales and spikes again and... I have so much to do and so little

Entry #15

Well, they ain't laughing now are they?

And I'm neither.

Holly Celestia I'm such an idiot! I ruined everything!

I met up with Sweetie today. I sneaked out of the castle - with a little help of Night Hawk, who felt guilty for telling me this old stories and giving me the idea for my "stunt" in the first place - to go to my date with Sweetie Belle. I was still grounded after all.

I arrived a little early at Sugarcube Corner, the knot of my red tie was perfect, my scales shiny, claws dull and everything was just perfect. I thought nothing could go wrong. Sweetie arrived with the first clock strike at one o'clock. I freaked a little first when I saw that she didn't wore anything, but then I noticed it. The purple flower in her mane, right next to her right ear. It was the same shade of purple as my scales. It hypnotized me so much I first didn't even notice her perfume. I could smell her across the room, against everything else that smelled nice. That was because, I learned as she came towards the table next to the window where I was sitting, she used so much of it! I could pretty much taste it as we greeted each other. Why would somepony use so much perfume? Was she nervous too? And I just realize, I must have smelled of scale polish! That stuff reeks! Oh my Celestia...

Well, it doesn't matter anymore. So we greeted each other and in an instant Mr. Cake came over to take our orders. Milkshake and a croissant with fresh butter for Sweetie and for me water and what ever they had with some gems in it. I got a gem muffin. And then, we talked. And talked. And talked even more. We joked, we laughed and even talked about our childhood a bit. Then Sweetie asked what happened with this one stallion and his machines the colts were so much into back then. So I told her about the arcade that now was where formerly Quills and Sofas had been. It had surprised nopony when that had to close. Nopony even knew how it stayed open like that so many years.

So after our little lunch, we went to the arcade. I had originally thought about going to the cinema, since I liked these new colored movies and I hope she would too, but fate had other ideas. The arcade it was.

The arcade was like a meet up point for everything that wasn't an adult. When it first opened some colts and fillies even skipped school to go there. So the owner, Eight Bit, started to open not until two in the afternoon, when school was over. It didn't hurt his business at all. So when we arrived around three it was already loud and full, but not so full we turned around. Sweetie told me the only experience she had with machines like this she made with this JoyBoy a classmate of hers had back in school. I don't have much experience either, I told her as we approached the first two player game: table hockey. Although I have a JoyBoyTwo, I never used it. It was a present from Rainbow for my fourteenth birthday.

So we played table hockey and first Sweetie used her hooves to play. She was no enemy for me with them. I was so much more used to handle things with my claws than the unicorn. So I let her win a few times. What she of course noticed, but she wasn't angry. Then we played fighting is magic, pony cart two and parasprite hunt. Who ever invented the last game had to be a genius. It was played with this little device a pony had to hold with both front hooves to aim at the parasprites on the screen. Sweetie, still a unicorn, was clumsy with her hooves. So I got behind her and helped her aim. We got so close and it was so nice!

But after that... As we wandered through the room again, both still a little blushing, Sweetie spotted this dance game. It had a platform on the ground who notice if you made the right dance move as shown on the screen. Two little fillies were playing at the time and Sweetie wanted to play. I told her I'm not that much of a dancer but she convinced me: "It is just for fun, come on!" How should I resist that smile? So we waited till our turn and then I sucked. The game was designed to be played with four legs, not two. I couldn't even made half the moves it showed me. Sweetie on the other hoof was a natural and had a blast. She danced so good, you could think the machine tried to imitate her. Of course the other visitors noticed and so did he.

I wrote about him already. Sweeties old classmate with the JoyBoy. Button Mash. He was there. They greeted each other the moment they saw one another. Apparently Eight Bit was his cousin and he works now at the arcade. He wasn't at the welcome home party for Sweetie because he was in Las Pegasus the last few days for a game developer conference. They present the newest game machines there and so on. Button and Sweetie talked and then he asked her if she wanted to dance with him to brake the high score. They got back up to the platform, Button entered the bit and then, they danced. And I just stood there, watching. They were good and it was a lot of fun to watch them, but it made me so... angry. I don't know why, but with every passing second it got worse. Before I could put my head around it, Sweetie smiled. The same smile she gave me earlier. Now directed at the brown colt dancing next to her. I snapped.

I don't know what happened after that moment. Not really. A lot of blurry images. The next thing I know is that I standing over Sweetie, breathing heavy while she had her eyes closed, a tear running down her cheek and singing. She sung and it was so beautiful. I heard nothing like it in my entire life. I looked around confused. Someone had smashed in the screen of the dancing game. Other machines were knocked over, bent to the breaking point. Then I noticed Button Mash. He was lying in front of my still outstretched claw, on the ground, crying. And I realized, I did that!

The police came a minute later. They didn't zap me this time, because I was just sitting there myself, tears running down my face just like Sweetie and Button. What have I done? At the moment, mum is still speaking with the mayor and the police in her throne room downstairs. I don't know what will happen next, but I'm scared and so... angry. At me. For ruining everything. For being a freaking dragon.

Entry #16

How lucky can one single dragon be?

I have... a marefriend, I guess? I mean, we kissed and... yeah, that's all we did actually. So I don't really know but I'm pretty sure.

So what happened over the last three days I didn't write? Well, mom wasn't angry, that's a start. Again we talked a lot and she said that since I'm a teenage dragon she expected that my hormones will go crazy at some point and I would start doing stupid things. And now that she knew of Sweetie she said things finally made sense for her. Also, she wasn't surprised I would have a thing for Sweetie Belle. Why is no one finding that weird?

I was a little surprised she didn't got the secret out of Applejack. I thought she had talked by now. Twilight can be pretty headstrong too if she wants and I don't think we have an anvil lying around to throw at her. It helped to pull her from Pinkie in the past. "I would never do something like that to Applejack. If she doesn't want to tell me a secret, I let her be. I love her to much to do otherwise." Still have a lot to learn I think.

I'm still in a lot of trouble. I won't get any pocket money for the next ten to five years or so. Not until the machines in the arcade are paid off. I'm also banned from the arcade, for a month. Eight Bit was here yesterday and I apologized of course - I'm doing that a lot lately too - and he said it was fine. He was young once too and knows that a stallion can get a little hot headed if another stallions approaches his mare. Of course he was right next to the dancing game when it happened and he saw everything. He just made me promise to not scare Button anymore. His marefriend wouldn't like the smell of piss very much.

I didn't know Button had a marefirend in the first place. Her name is... I don't remember. We talked so much it slipped my mind. Just like the idea that Button really just wanted to beat that highscore with Sweetie. They are friend after all. I feel so dumb. The rest of that day I stayed in my room and pitied myself. Nothing I really I want to write about much.

So then yesterday happened. Sweetie of all ponies felt sorry and wanted to apologize to me. Do you get that? Because I didn't. She came over and knocked at my door. I hat myself shut in. Closed the curtains, the door and no light was burning. It made me feel... better in some way. Like it was a cave. I don't know what that is with dragon and caves but it somehow works. I told who ever there was to go away. "Oh, OK. I come back later then", she said in her sweet voice. I nearly fell as I rushed to the door and opened it. And Sweetie Belle was just standing there, trying to smile, but it just came out as a sad smile. "Can we talk?"

The words hurt. It were the same word Rarity used when she let me down. My heart missed a beat that moment I think. All I could think was: "Please, not again." But I invited her in and opened the curtains so she could see the mess I had made out of my room. I also opened the window. Some smoke was still under the ceiling. With the stuff I had thrown around the only place for her to really sit down was my bed. I stayed on the ground and sit down next to her in front of the bed, looking at my feet.

She started to apologize then, said she didn't want to make me jealous. I tried to deny it, but the evidence was overwhelming. Young Sweetie maybe had believed me, but the Sweetie on my bed didn't. She told me that the game got her all fired up and she really wanted to beat that highscore too and it was just like they were foals again, playing. She didn't even tried to hurt me or something like that. She really had fun with me and she didn't want something like that to ruin what started so nice. That was when she hugged me from behind, her front legs going over my shoulder while she was nuzzling my head. "I was so scared Spike. Not for me, but for you. You looked so pained. You cried the whole time."

I don't even remember that I cried while I was in rage. I thought it had started after I came to my senses again.

I told her. I told her that I liked her and that when I saw her at the party, that I thought she looked really good, that I like her smile, her carefree attitude and I wanted to tell her so much more but I never could. She put her lips on mine and silenced me. I've been kissed before. By Twilight, by Rarity, by Cadance or by Twilights Mom but never, ever I felt like I felt that moment. I felt like I could lift the whole castle and more. I felt like a million bits. That was my real first kiss, on the lips, and it was the greatest thing I've ever done. We stayed in my room a few hours and kissed a little more. OK, a lot more. I can't put into words. I just know that these hours felt like they were gone too fast.

Sweetie had to go home at some point. She had to train, do her chores in the boutique and so on. And she said I should perhaps clean my room. A lady doesn't like to make out in a messy room very much after all. But after all of that, I would clean all of the castle without as much as a complain.

I'm going to visit her tomorrow. Buy some flowers and hopefully kiss some more. It's really nice, OK?

Entry #18

The next few days will be awkward, I know it. It always is. It's pony mating time.

Ivory Scroll, or Mayor Mare as she is called sometimes, just put out the yellow flag. The first mares are in heat. Estrus, the correct term. I learned that stuff from books so please don't look at me like I'm an alien or something for knowing stuff about the other gender. I had a better education than someponies who went to school, thank you very much. Mum always made sure I know my stuff.

With the yellow flag out everypony is rushing into the market to get their freezers packed still it's burst, so they last a week or more.

It's not like they become sex zombies like this one movie Sweetie and I tried to get in... or something like that. It's just the most likeliest time for a mare to have a foal and her hormones are back on the level of teen who just found out what her hoof is capable of in the right place. So the mares try to stay indoors as much as possible. In the important facilities like hospitals, the male staff is working overtime to keep everything going. But everything else is closed.

I noticed the flag only because Rarity pointed it out to me when I got to the boutique today. Sweetie was also in the room, helping Rarity cleaning up stuff from a costumer I must have missed. So we talked and since our relationship is as young as us, we decided to not see each other for a couple of days. Not that Rarity had given us a choice in the matter. While she found us as a couple "cute", she didn't want her little sister beating her in becoming a mother. We both were red like tomatoes.

But it got me thinking, for the future of course. Could I even have a foal? Not necessarily with Sweetie, if we for some reason shouldn't stay together, but in general. Could I even get a mare pregnant? From my understanding I can't. They are mammals and I'm... a dragon. My kind lays eggs, they don't. Normally that doesn't work. But there are also the griffins, who Mum once explained are a subspecies of lions who somehow got mixed up with eagles. Eagles are birds and laying eggs too. Lions don't. Did I ever mention that my life is confusing?

Entry #19

Red flag day three.

I found the few books on dragon anatomy we have in the library. And they are totally useless because they all are assumptions. Seems no pony ever was brave enough to walk up to dragon and ask if he or she would be willing to help with a anatomy book for confused young dragons raised by ponies.

So I did a little self study. In the literal sense. I took hostage the biggest mirror in the palace and studied myself. Everything. So I made sure my door was locked. And I may have pushed my wardrobe in front of it too. Then I did what I under normal circumstances only did in the bathroom. I pushed it out. And looked at it in the mirror. Boy was that weird. And I compared it with the pony anatomy books I had gathered the other day. It was different alright. And I made sure it couldn't fall off.

Don't look like that! The book on dragons said that we maybe could change sex like some reptiles did!

But it's there for good. I made sure. I hope.

I had made a list of things I wanted to try. Nothing extreme, but I wanted to know how my body works. So my first experiment was if I could get it bigger. A bit thinking of Sweetie with a hoof on a totally improper place had two results. It got bigger, stiff and I was a little ashamed of myself. Just a little. But it was still smaller than what the book described as average for a stallion. Good thing I was still growing. My body in total that is.

I may have to burn this book so no one, pony or otherwise, may ever find it. The second experiment involved a lot of... touching. The book said stallions usually slap their thingy on their belly to get the wanted result. But I don't think that would work for me. Also I didn't felt like bobbing up and down on all fours.

Wait a moment... That was what Snips and Snails were doing the one time behind the... ewwww....

Never mind. So I that down, in front of the mirror and... got to work I guess. Sure enough, it feels really great but the longer I did this, the more it hurt. I made sure my claws are dull, so that couldn't be it. So I stopped for today.

I still have a few days of peace and quiet before daily life continues.

Entry #21

What have I done to myself?!

With the "spring break" over, I met up with Sweetie Belle today and... I just couldn't take my eyes of her flank. I even tried to look past her tail. A gentlestallion doesn't do that! A gentledrake neither! You just don't do that. It isn't polite. And all I could think of that some day, maybe, we would lay together on her or my bed and I would touch her, caress and touch her even more. My claws would wander under her tail and... What is happening to me? I never thought thoughts like that. That something you do with somepony you lo

I had to come down. I took a very cold shower. I hope I did at least. I don't feel the cold like ponies do. My inner fire keeps me warm all the time.

Love. I got careful with that word. I loved Rarity, I always thought. But I never thought about her like that. Well, I was younger but still. So this isn't love maybe? Could it be my greed? Is it coming back? Like when I got all the birthday presents? Or at the arcade? But why? Because I want to make Sweetie... mine? Again these thought. It has to be the greed. I'm a nice dragon. I don't do stuff like that.

I have to get away for a while. At least from Sweetie. I won't do that to her, she doesn't deserve that. I will hide a few days away from Ponyville and see if its get better. I think that's for the best.

Entry #23

I didn't run away in the end.

I thought I could hide in Fluttershys old shed behind the cottage, but I ran straight into Big Mac. The stallion, my uncle as soon as Mom and Applejack seal the deal, just looked at me an knew something was wrong. He dropped the tools he had with him and came over to me. He was probably there to repair something for his wife.

Big Macintosh is also one of the ponies who really seemed to have changed over the last years. He is still a stallion of few word, but he changed his look so much. If you had asked me a few years ago I would describe him as the strong goofball from the farm. With his messy mane and such. Well, his mane is still a mess but with his neat sideburns and the orange stubble at his chin, he looks more like one of this "lonely, slightly dark, I work alone superheroes in trench coat" from one of my comics. If he would exchange the strangle of straw for a cigarette, it would be perfect.

He saw the bag I had with me and asked where I was headed. I just shrugged my shoulders, cause I didn't really had an answer to that. Not any more. The moment I turned to continue my journey he put one of his big hooves on my shoulder and pulled me over to a tree stump. Big Mac asked again what was wrong. I thought of running, but nearly every pony is faster than me. Especially from the apple family. So I told him about me and Sweetie, about my the stunt I pulled on hearts and hooves, the arcade an just everything. He is a very good listener, I give him that. He didn't interrupted me, or asked anything or so on. He just let me talk for once. And when I finished, he had this knowing smirk on his face. Just like Rarity if she had figured out a secret, or Mum if she found something in a book she had searched for days. Very much like his sisters "I told you" smirk.

"Do you know how I tell folks that Shys my mare?" He then asked me. I could only shake my head. "I do nothing. Shy was a model once. Stallions recognize her if we go into a bigger city and often try to hit on her. Let them look, let them try. Because I know she loves me. She would never hurt me willingly. So all I think, when another stallion looks, is that: Yeah, that's my mare. You can't have that. Or we take our little seedling with us and they don't even try. Young colts this day run if they only so much as smell a diaper."

Big Mac has it all figured out it seems. After that, he took me with him back to the farm. We talked more, about mares, about... stallion stuff and so on. Shy was happy to see me. I should visit more often she said before she made us dinner. I had a great evening with both of them. I think I will talk with Big Mac again in the near future. So many things make sense now, after I talked to him. For examples, mares want to be looked at. But you had to be sneaky, because they would be offended it you thought you could do it so plain and... Yeah. Don't really get it.

I nodded off on the couch at the farm later. I hope I didn't worry someone to much. It's not that I told anyone I would be gone. So hopefully nobody noticed I wasn't home the last night.

But, it looks like someone found my diary. Again. I put a little gem dust on the first cover and that was gone as I picked it up. Maybe it wasn't that good of a hiding spot under my mattress. Will taking a shower now and then I head to the boutique later. And always remember, if you have dirty thoughts, do as Big Mac and think of Granny Smith. Yeah, this will work.

Entry #24

That was a close call. And this time it wasn't me who learned something, but Sweetie did.

When I came to the boutique today, everypony was gathered there. I mean Mum, Applejack, Rarity, Pinkie and so on. Sweetie was making a fuss and was talking rapidly while Fluttershy was calming her down. "Spike said he would run away!" She tried to tell the others. What was the truth originally, but since I wrote that, my plans had changed. Thanks to Big Mac. But Sweetie didn't know that. But now I knew who had found my diary.

"Look, there he is." And all I could do was grin and wave.

The situation dissolved after that. Twilight had to go back to the castle, some important law had to be written. Applejack headed back for her cart on the market, where Roseluck kept an eye on it. Pinkie had promised the twins to play with them and Rarity had orders to fill. That left only Sweetie, me and Fluttershy. She told us maybe we should use our mouths for talking sometimes. She had spotted us in our hideout a few times by the looks of it. Well, it was on her property and she worked there and... You don't notice Fluttershy if she doesn't want to be noticed.

And then it was just me and Sweetie Belle down in the boutique. She apologized instantly when we were alone, but it had been to tempting to her. She came over and I wasn't there. She saw all the quills and ink on my desk and then looked for my diary. First under my pillow, then under my mattress. It really is a bad hiding spot.

Right know, Sweetie is sitting on my bed as I'm writing. She told me she left something in here I maybe should read.

Entry #25

Wow, reading all that from back then is funny. But it was a really confusing time. Oh look at me, writing about the last year as if so far away. Nearly whole year anyway, with Hearths Warming just passed. Well, I started this to sort my thoughts and it certainly helped me with that. But when there is nothing to sort out, why should I write something down? I think that excuse is as good as any.

So, what has changed? I'm still together with Sweetie, to get the most important thing out first. Twilight and Applejack are married now and on paper, Applejack is now my stepmother. But that didn't changed really that much between us. She first felt like she had to act the role now, but today we're like friend with the rule that she is older and knows better sometimes. I respect her authority, you could say. Also, now she has this fancy title of princess-consort. A lot of potential to make fun of, because she hates titles. And I know Princess Celestia knows that and she goes out of her way to always use her title if she speaks to Applejack. Who thought she is a prankster?

I'm now working as the librarian officially. We came to the conclusion that it would be best if I take over that mantle from mom. She is too busy with ruling the country. I get paid from town hall, can pay of the damage at the arcade myself and I get a feel for a normal job. Sweetie tries to make money with her singing. She is at the hospital every other day to entertain the sick ponies a little and others she is in the park, making music with the other musicians there. She gets a lot of tip, but I think that's wasted potential. She belongs on a big stage. Apple Bloom of course works on her family farm and Scootaloo is now the safety instructor for the school. You know, teaching young pegasi how to crash the right way. I never thought, when Rainbow said that even crashing has to be trained, she was serious. "Have you forgotten how often I crashed? How do you think I wasn't in the hospital every other week?" Nothing to add here.

Pinkie also has a coltfriend now. Cheese Sandwich just came back one day and never left again, I guess. They moved into the house next to Sugarcube Corner and now they both work there. Well, the Cakes needed the help badly. If a town is a town with a castle, many ponies seem to think it would a nice place to settle down. And with Mom being the alicorn of books - she isn't, she is actually the alicorn of friendship, but everyone calls her that - a lot of young families came to Ponyville in hope for a good education for their foals. A new schoolhouse had to be build and Cheerilee hired two additional teachers. I know both of them because they come over every other day to get material for their lessons. The first one is Blue Light, a CSGU (Celestias School for Gifted Unicorns) graduate. He is a little strange. But compared to moms strangeness, he is a decent fella, as Big Mac had put it. The other is Sunset Shimmer. Yeah, strange how that happened. I kind of forgot the mirror in my rooms closet. And four months back, when Sweetie and I were very busy on my bed, she popped out.

After a very awkward moment for the three of us and we gathered Twilight and Applejack and Sunset explained that she couldn't have a live over there. She had no records and so wasn't unable to take on a job, or rent a place or anything. She had lived with the other worlds Rarity the last years but there was an accident and the police showed up. They wanted to throw her out of country and so she came back before they could do that. She lived a few weeks at the castle after that, but moved out the moment she had the job at the school. "I never want to be in a castle again in my life. Bad memories."

Besides all of that, we only had the normal Ponyville horror. So, why I'm writing again?

Sex isn't the issue this time. Sweetie and I are in a very stable relationship and so on. But of course this is about our relationship. I think Sweetie wants to move in somewhere together. The last weeks she always complained about her sister, how much of a slave driver she is and that Apple Bloom and Scootaloos apartment is so nice. Also, with all the new ponies coming to town houses are build in advance and are cheap. And It's not like I wouldn't like that. But with my savings gone and most of my pay still being used to pay of the arcade, I don't know if we have the money to sustain ourselves. Big Mac helped me a lot in the past and I will talk to him tomorrow. Maybe I could take a second job on the farm or something. I really don't want to tell Sweetie off, but it looks like I will have to.

I think, I was an idiot in the past whenever I said I want to be an adult. You have to take so many things you have to care about.

Author's Note

I don't know if there will be an entry tomorrow. I want to go over everything written so far.

Entry #26

A surprise defines itself by its name. I talked to my uncle, just not the one I planned.

Shining and Cadance made a surprise visit. Just imagine you and your marefriend woke up because of hundreds of guards who are securing the perimeter. I swear it was Sweetie who cried "Earthquake" this morning.

So you can imagine there wasn't a possibility for me to get away from the castle today, even if I wanted to. Cadance was all over me and Sweetie. Of course she knew I had a marefriend, but she didn't know it was Sweetie. Comes with living so far away in the frozen north. Its a two week trip every time and they don't have that time while running a country. So most of the conversation is done through letters. Cadance remembered that Sweetie Belle was one of the flower fillies at her wedding and how cute she looked in her dress. She even invited us to come back with her to the Empire for a time. I could see in Sweeties eyes how much she liked the idea.

They're staying for a week, so I have a little time to ask for some holiday. I think the mayor will say yes. I didn't take any since I took the job after all. And it let Sweetie forget about the whole moving together thing for a while. So less pressure on that topic too.

I still talked with Shining, but he wasn't that much of a help. They really only moved together after the wedding. Shining lived in his house in the city and Cadance official lived in the castle. But he told me to just talk with Sweetie about the issue and that if was not sure about it, maybe I'm not ready for that.

And in the evening, when the whole family sat in the living room of the castle, listening to the crackling of the fire, Cadance dropped the bomb. She is with foal. She and Shining thought it was the right time so they tried for a foal in second estrus wave last year in fall. For an hour the whole room was just hugging and celebrating. but something wasn't right with Applejack. I saw it in her face. Mom was to occupied with Cadance and Shining to notice, I think.

We talked in the kitchen. She loves Twilight, with all her heart, but she feels like she is ignoring a part of what she is. A mare. She wants foals too. It was a bit awkward, but I thing the time changed our friendship a little. So I listened and told her, after she was finished, that she should talk with Mom. When someone can help her with that issue, its her. Well, it should be her. They're married after all.

Suddenly, I glad to get away for a while. I sense a lot weirdness incoming with that topic.

Author's Note

Sorry it took one day more than I thought. Brother became 16 and we had to party a "little".

Entry #27

Well, were in the train at the moment.

The week was over faster than Mom if she knew she would be late otherwise.

Cadance and Shining stayed two days in Ponyville, and then left for Canterlot to visit Princess Celestia, Luna and my Grandparents. Now that I think of it, Twilight Velvet and Night Light always joked about that I'm her grandson to tease Mom when we were smaller. I was very tempted to join them on the trip to Canterlot. I would've liked to see my Grandparents again. It has been what now? 3 Months since we last saw each other. That's actually a little sad, if you remember how close we actually life together. But it's not like their old. Well, they're older, but not so old hat they sit at home the whole day. Gramps is still a professor at CSGU and Granny works as an editor for the local news paper now. With the Daring Do series over, she had to find a new job after all. I remember the last book. It was so awesome at the end when Daring... nah. No spoilers. Who knows who will read this.

When I'm at the train, I must have convinced the mayor to give some time off, didn't I? Well, no. Because the library and my home are the same place, no one knew my actual work hours. So, no claim for holidays for this dragon. But thankfully, Mum said she would take over a little bit. She had finished some really important stuff over the last weeks and now just needed to relax a little. Well, I know what kind of bomb Applejack is carrying around, so I highly doubt she will relax. But as long I'm not there when she goes off...

Sweetie just told Rarity that she was invited by Cadance and that was it. After eight hour makeover session the day we went off. She had to look her best for the princess after all.

I will make this short. The train ride will mostly be very boring. Two weeks just snow and the sound of the steam engine. And this is the fastest train the empire has. One would think I had enough train rides in my life. But with Sweetie, who is lying against my belly at the moment, I think it will be fun. Also, the royal cart is very comfortable.

Author's Note

Actually finished this yesterday, but I forgot to press the "publish" button xD

Entry #28

Best train ride of my life! I met another dragon!

Yesterday, on our third day on the train, we suddenly had to make a full stop. The train driver and the guards were running around outside in the snow and were suddenly at high alert. Then this orange dude busted into the royal cart and was talking three hundred miles per hour about something bit laying on the rails and so on.

So Shining decided to take a look and I joined him of course. This was the most exciting thing to happen after three days of boredom and I had nothing better to do. Shining suited up in his snow gear, that was stored in the luggage cart behind ours. I didn't need something like that, my inner flame was no match for a little snow.

We exited the train and with some guards at our side we made for the front of the train. I think I was the first one to notice. Dragon smell, badly. Well, wild dragons do. Nut I think that has something to do with territory. How I know that? Now comes the best part. In front of our train laid a massive dragon. A female dragon. Don't ask me how I knew, but I could tell the moment I saw her. Her eyes were closed and her right wing didn't looked good at all. It was at least broken. An suddenly all eyes were on me. All the ponies just expected me to go up to her and ask what was wrong. Well, I did exactly that.

She was nice.

Her name is Esmeralda, and she lived in this mountains for a few thousand years now. She fought with a another dragon for this territory and won, but the battle left her badly wounded. She tried to reach her cave, but crashed down half way. She walked a few miles and found the rails. Esmeralda was a proud dragon, but she wasn't stupid. She would take help, even from ponies. Shining told her that the one in charge was in the train and he would get her. A minute later Cadance and Sweetie joined us. Esmeralda just looked at Sweetie and asked me if she was my mate. She could smell me on her. She asked more about me, my parents and my upbringing. I told her what I knew and from my journey to the dragon lands a few years back. But at some point it was time to move her of the rails.

She is now sleeping on the roof of our cart. Cadance decided to help her and take her with us to the empire. All the gems in the royal cart, mostly used for decoration, were dismounted to fed her.

I still can't believe it. I now have a dragon who I can ask all the things I always wanted to know about my kind. This is so exiting!

Entry #30

Sweetie and I had a talk today. A very important talk. Maybe even the most important talk of our live so far.

We were sitting in our cabin, watching out of the window how the snow entombed land passed by. Then it all started with; "Spike, can we talk?" She stood up, walked over to me and sat down again next me, nuzzling my chin. Than she told me how her last weeks went. How she did the shores Rarity had her do every other day, how she sung in the hospital and with the music ponies in the park and more importantly, how she felt about all of that. She knew that she had talent, but she doubted that she ever will be famous. "You know Miss Fiddlesticks, and Miss Octavia, my music teacher from Canterlot. Their are both good singers, but neither is really so famous that they can live from making music alone. Miss Octavia obviously is giving lessons and Miss Fiddlesticks is working with Carrot Top on her farm." She further told me that she feared that she would be stuck in this phase of her life. Living with Rarity, just one day after another.

I never had such fears. I was actually happy living in the castle, managing the library and all. I know I complain from time to time, but who doesn't?

Of course I tried to cheer her up, telling her that I really like her singing and that she belonged on a big stage next to Saphire Shores and the like. She just smiled, kissed me and shook her head. "That's is not what I'm getting at Spike", she added further. Sweetie continued how she had seen the world of the stars already. After all, her sister is a fashion star. It would be nice for while, she mused, bit in the end, it was very, very lonely. Rarity didn't had a special somepony in years. Either because she didn't found anyone, or because she didn't had the time. "I don't want that, Spike."

But now I realized why she wanted to move out, making a step forward. She felt stuck, getting nowhere. And why did I wanted to stay in the castle? Because I'm just lazy. Just down the hall is my workplace, I have big ass bathroom and every comfort I could wish for. I felt like dirt for even considering denying her wish. I loved this mare, for the last year I told her over and over again that she was my everything. It was time to back up that claim. I will rent or even buy a house as soon as we are back in Ponyville. Even if I have to take on a second job.

But Sweetie wasn't done. "Spike, listen. I know this might scare you, but... If I don't manage to get a job in a year or two... I want to become a housewife. You know, staying at home, cooking for you and maybe even..."

I knew she meant. A foal, foals. I was shocked, at least for a moment. I mean, we didn't even...
Well, we did kind off, you know. Licking and stuff... But not the real deal in any imagine of the way.

I couldn't say anything at that moment and I still haven't. I just kissed her again and held her in my embrace. Where she still is. Sleeping with her head on my belly. I hope by tomorrow, I know what to say.

Entry #31

"Spike, what are you reading?" I nearly got a heart attack as the voice of my wife hit my ears. The book in my claws dropped to the ground and the ink on the desk infront of me spilled over the frech parchment I had rolled out. "Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you."

I sighted and grabbed a towel I had ready in case of drool emergencies. Saphire like to play whit her fathers "toys" a little to much these days. "No it's ok sweetie", I assured the unicorn, who was already gathering the ink on the desk and levitated it back into the little bottle. "I was just reading over the old material for the book."

"So you finally writing it? For real this time?" She shoved me a little, picking up my old diary from between my feet. "I remember this. It was your first one right? The one you started with. I haven't seen it in years."

"Well," I rubbed the back of my head. "It has some very embarrassing stuff in it. I would probably burn it, if it would not contain your letter. You know, the one with the permission to ogle you all I want." I turned my head slightly so Sweetie Belle could se my wiggling eyebrows, but also to look at her. I had just read the last entry and a ten years younger Sweetie Belle was still in my mind. But the version I got was even better. She didn't keep her slender appearance after our second foal, but she was still the very definition of female beauty. Her mane was also longer, and combed instead of curled. "How was work?"

These days, she worked with Vinyl Scratch in her studio. The DJ was very much past her prime and now made money with localizing movies from Germane or Prance. Thus, she needed voice actors. It was an easy enough job to do for someone gifted like Sweetie and she liked to have a bigger audience than me and the kids. "You know Vinyl, I had to improvise half of the dialogue, because in her translation every third word was 'radical dude' or 'hell yeah'." She grinned and as one we leaned forward for a little kiss. "Did the kids behave?"

"Well, Aunt Rarity came over with little Elusive and took Barb with her for ice cream. And Saphire is sleeping upstairs."

"So", Sweetie started, again with a grin. "we are alone for now and have a dirty magazine?" She levitated the diary in front of my face. "Let's read it. I want to know what little Spike thought about me."

"Well, little Spike thinks your the most gorgeous mare ever and would like bury himself between your flanks. And my younger self was just to nervous to even think about that." I love Sweeties laugh. "But I have a proposal to make. I let you read mine, if I can read yours."

"I lost it!" OK, that answer came way to fast and I could only raise an eyebrow at her. "I burned it, buried the ash in Everfree Forest and burned that too!"

"Well, you had my curiosity, but now you have my attention. Where is it?" Sweetie dropped my diary and made a step backwards. "It's in the attic, isn't it?" Her eyes widened, then she bolted. A dragon high on her heels.

Author's Note

I will end this story at this point. There will be another story like this, because my English still is far away from being perfect. But Spikes second diary will have to wait for a while. I have to gather ideas again and so on.

Entry #2

I shouldn't really be surprised. Let a dragon have a diary for two days and a pony has to read it. At least Twilight apologized when I reclaimed it from her. And she asked me to talk with a special pony that afternoon. Apparently, me finding it weird to have two moms is worthy being send to a shrink. I can tell you diary, I was really angry. I smoked for half an hour. Of course I know that two mares can fall in love. It's nothing new. We have a few of those couples all over Ponyville. It was just that I never imagined I would be a child of one of those couples. And do you know what the shrink asked? "What wrong with that?" The nerve!

But maybe I should start earlier. Well, after Twilight and Applejack talked with me about what I had written in my diary, they told me they wanted that I talk with someone about my feelings outside all of this. That also excluded all our friends. So a professional it was. Her name is Half Mind and she was a nice elderly mare with a green coat and white mane done in a dud. The room was what got to me. I know I'm not an adult dragon but I'm also not a baby anymore. There were toys all around and she asked me if I wanted to play with something. And she laughed as I rolled my eyes. But, all in all, as I said, she was nice. She asked me how my day was so far and a few other general question. We talked about me, about my life with princess Celestia, before I started living with Twilight and so on. And then she put out the heavy stuff.

"Why do you think you feel awkward calling Twilight your mother? You just told me you think she is just that. And a good one too."

What do you say to something like that? I mean. Yeah, Twilight is my mom alright. But, that's only my perspective, isn't it? I don't even know how Twilight thinks about that? Does she even know what the princess told me? So that what I told her. And what did she do? She nodded and wrote something down before asking the next questions! Well, maybe there is no answer to all of this.

Entry #5

I think I had that coming. With everything working it self out for the better lately Twilight got the idea that we all should come together and talk about the issue. The issue with me having two moms that is. So today we, as in Applejack, Twilight and me, sat together in the dining room of the castle and talked.

I like Applejack. She was always a friend to me. And I kind off think that's my problem with all of that. I think more of her as a friend than a mother. Don't get me wrong. I think Applejack would make a great mother, but she is only what, eight or nine years older than me? Not an age difference that enforces any respect. Not that Applejack isn't a pony that would have problems instill some respect into another pony, but as I said; She is more a friend.

But that's only one part. I grew up with Shining Armor and Cadance around. The perfect couple. So I always imagined the perfect relationship has to be like theirs. With a stallion and a mare. I have nothing against same sex couples. I find it weird, but some ponies like weird. I just don't. I just don't want to hurt anyone's feelings but that's how I feel about that. I could never kiss a stallion. Gross.

So that whats I told mum and Applejack.

I don't know how to write down her answer, so I will just quote her. Minus the accent. "I don't have to be your mother sugarcube. But I would hope that you could see me as family." And I told her I already did that. I told them the day I came back from the dragon lands and that hasn't changed. These ponies are my family. I think Applejack forgot that, because she just bonked her head with her hoof and hugged me. And that was it. Everyone was happy for some reason. I thought they would be angry for how I felt.

Maybe I didn't get a second mother after all, but I now know I have a real good family.

Entry #8

Guess who finally decided to get her own guards? It only needed a horde of reporters to make Twilight see reason. Maybe she should get engaged more often then.

For now its just two guards for the front entrance actually. But it better than nothing and they make ponies wipe their hooves before entering the castle. Their names are Iron Heart and Night Hawk. Twilight wanted them to be a pegasus and a thestral to show that everypony is welcome here.

I maybe should talk with her about those maids again.

Project Sweetie Belle. I still have no idea how I should approach her. I got thinking again and it is actually pretty weird with my crush on Rarity back then. I know it was years ago, but some ponies still treat me like a baby from time to time and ask if I still always follow Rarity like a dog. It makes me flinch every time I hear that comparison. I know they don't know about the mirror, but it's just to close to home. But Granny Smith means well in the end.

I don't want to give up just yet. Sweetie and I seem to have so much in common and it felt really nice to talk with her. And as I said, that she is very beautiful also helps a bit. Not that I'm a dog chasing tail. NOW I DO IT MYSELF. I'm done for today...

Entry #10

I knew that accent wasn't equestrian! Iron Hearts parents are originally from Germane. Her name in her language is actually "Eisenherz" and mine would translate to "Stachel". I think that is very interesting. I know Germane hasn't the best history, but still. She even taught me to say "I'm a mighty dragon!"

"Ich bin ein dummer Drache!"

The next pony from Germane I meet will make eyes, I'm sure.

The preparations for "operation abduction" are going smoothly. Mom has a lot of scrap metal in the basement from building her machines and with my fire breath its no problem at all to heat it up and bent it the way I need. And its also a lot of fun. I thought I maybe could grow a few gems to add into the mix, but it would take too much time I guess. Hearts and Hooves is the day after tomorrow after all.

I think Night Hawk noticed what I'm doing. She sniffed me as I passed her today and had this creepy fanged smile.

Also, Applejack is back for good. Spring preparations are over and she is now resting in moms and her room. Mom is very happy to have her fiance back. I know she missed her a lot and I feel a bit bad for not noticing earlier. I thought we got closer. Well, we did but I need to put a bit more into it, it seems. But how should I notice with everything I have going on and her just hiding away with her books. She always does that. And even more if she feels sad or lonely.

Am I a bad son?

I think I will leave it at that for today an look for Twilight. Maybe we can sit down on the couch and talk for a bit. And hug.

Author's Note

"Ich bin ein dummer Drache!" - "I'm a stupid dragon!"

Entry #17

A whole week? That's a new record of not writing I guess.

So, what happened? Well I took out Sweetie as I said I would. After a little awkward run in with Rarity. I had the flowers, hibiscus like Roseluck recommended to me and a smirk I couldn't put out of my face. Well, Rarity could. It was she again who I met first after entering her shop and she glared at me again. Then she pointed silently at me, then the kitchen. She asked me if it was true that I rampaged in the arcade over Sweetie and so on. I told her what happened and then... She smiled and called Sweetie down for me. I know I'm missing something important here.

So I gave Sweetie the flowers, who she put away in her room for later and then we went out. We wandered through Ponyville a bit and talked, but I thin we both actually just looked for a spot where no one would spot us. And is it turned out, I was right. We found a little place near Fluttershys Animal Center, her old cottage, were no pony could possibly spot us. And we started kissing again. The whole afternoon, just sitting in our little hideout and kissing each other. With the amount of important talking lately I was very thankful for the quiet, nice, silence next to Sweetie. My head felt like cotton after a few hours though.

And that's how I spend most of my days recently. Every other day I would pick up Sweetie and we go somewhere together. Tuesday we went to the cinema, not really watching a movie in the last row seats. Thursday we took the train to Canterlot and did some high tea, like Sweetie wanted. It was just drinking really fancy tea, looking each other in the eyes and playing with our hooves and feet under the table. We even weren't the only young couple there. A lot of other teenagers were there too. Seems to be the latest trend in the city. Also there was cake. So it also was really nice because I got another day with Sweetie and cake. And yesterday we made a little picnic in our hideout. Our hideout. I like the sound of that.

The days we weren't together I spend with my chores. Mom gave me some extra in exchange for my freedom. She thought it would be cruel to separate me and Sweetie, probably because of her and Applejack. With the free time Applejack had she spent most afternoons helping Twilight with her paperwork as much as possible. Also the one time I passed her study I heard moaning and I think paperwork isn't the only thing they did. And my "That room you will clean yourself", resulted only in giggles. We need maids!

What else? Well, the one time I picked Sweetie up Rarity complained that since the two of us were dating Sweetie always smelled of smoke.

Dragon to the bone baby!

Urg, can somepony please invent something to erase ink?

Entry #20

I just can't handle the stupidity.

Red flag day four by the way.

I'm a moron. Hard, scaly claws and squishy flesh are not a good mix. At least not without some kind of lubricant. I hope no pony will miss the big bottle of soap I stole from the big bathroom upstairs. And I hope I don't have to go upstairs again in the near future. It's so not helpful to hear your mothers moan each others name! I know Twilight had a spell to keep herself in check, so Applejack must be the driving force. So is she the boss in the relationship? The book said there is normally one who takes lead in every relationship and if that is Applejack, isn't she ruling the kingdom? I mean, she properly could make Twilight do anything. Well, at least that wasn't a problem with Shining. Everypony knows who is the boss between the two of them.

I think Sweetie and I have to still figure this out for ourselves. And I think I will not the one to lead. I always just followed I guess. She is the hero and I'm the companion. I don't really mind that at all actually. I would follow her everywhere.

Back to dirty business. With the soap everything was so much more pleasant. And I finally learned that if it comes down to that, I'm not so different than a stallion. I build up pressure and then, after a while, it bursts out. Had to clean the mirror. But it was just as the book about stallions described. So no freaky surprise when I ever will be with a mare. That is very good to know. Not that I expected that fire would come out there too, or something like that. Totatlly didn't had a nightmare just about that. Thanks princess.

And I just noticed I should have washed up my claws before writing.

Also, I should open a window. There is some kind of stench in the room.

Entry #22

Spike, I hope I find you first but to make sure I write down what I have to say to you:

You stupid, stupid dragon!
That's is what you are. How could you even think about running away? I read your last entry and I'll tell you what: I want you to look at me. To want me!

Spike, remember the stupid colt I told you about? The one why I started comics? That was you, you thick headed reptile!

I had a crush on you back then and I still have. Do you even know what you did to me? You showed me how a suitor has to be. You always said all those nice things about my sister, you helped her, listened to her about how her day was, complimented her when she needed it and... I wanted that too!

I also wanted a handsome, strong, smart and attentive suitor. That was even part of the reason why I took my lessons in Canterlot. I know all the colts in Ponyville and none of them comes even close to that description. I could have taken singing lessons from Fiddlesticks, Applejacks cousin. She knows a lot about singing too you know. And should I tell you another secret? After two years of the so called high society, I still haven't found a colt close to the description. And I thought that I never will. Especially after my sister let you down. You didn't even visit anymore and my younger self thought you hated me now too. So I left for Canterlot.

Can you guess why I never would find a colt like that? Because all the time it was a dragon what I wanted.

And then you finally noticed me. I was so happy. I don't care that you had a thing for my sister. She is my sister! We are very alike sometimes. If I would dye my mane and spend a few hours in the bathroom with some makeup I could even look exactly like her, even to the degree that our own parents wouldn't be able to separate us. My sister is a very kind, generous and beautiful mare and that you love me even more makes me so happy...

Spike, please come back home. Look all you want. Because, to be honest, I do it too.

With love,
Sweetie Belle.

PS: You should hide this better. I have a diary too and Rarity never found it.

Entry #29

I'm still overwhelmed from the new information I got from Esmeralda over myself.

I always knew that I was a dragon, but that was just about it. Did you know that I didn't grow wings until now because I never wanted any? Dragons can grow and even regrow limbs! I could chop of my claw and let it regrow over a few years. Not that I even want to try that. But if I really wanted to fly, my body would start growing wings. And that is only one new information about my species I got.

A few other examples are that dragons can get really, really old. Not just a few thousand years, but older. There are dragons even older than the princesses. Or that dragons come in all sizes. If I didn't want to grow bigger, I didn't had to. I made notes on everything. I think I will pick up my idea from back in the day and write the book about dragon anatomy myself.

She in return asked me, what ponies thought they knew about dragons. Her full belly laugh shook the whole train nearly from the rails when I told her about the sex change part in one of the books I found.

I talked with Esmeralda a lot the past few days, since she was with us. Cadance went up to the roof a few time too, but never for a longer period of time. Even an alicorn feels the cold after a while and she didn't want risk anything that could hurt her foal.

To my utter surprise, Sweetie Belle also went to talk with Esmeralda and she wanted to go alone. "This is a talk from mare to mare", she had said when I had got up to join her. When she came back, she had a little smirk on her lips, gave me kiss as she passed by me and vanished in our cabin, locking the door. I tried to ask her later that day about her talk with Esmeralda, but in the end, both of them told me it was a secret.

At least, the first week of our little journey is over now. Time runs so much faster if you have something to occupy yourself with.

Author's Note

I try to get back into writing. Not just this story.