From the Desk of Mayor Mare
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The following is an account of the “unique” situation that befalls Ponyville. Oh, but perhaps I should start with its source. About a year prior to this document’s origin, Princess Twilight Sparkle, absorbed herself in studying a love spell known only to Princess Cadence. When she deemed her studies sufficient, she immediately sought to test it. Her friends (at the time of writing this), the current bearers of the Elements of Harmony, decided to help out in finding who the best ponies to test it on were.
However, her mistakes were twofold. First, was failing to limit the range of her spell. And the second, miscalculating the potency of the spell. Outside of this, however, her spell worked, but not as she intended. The attraction between the two was so immediate and intense, that the two forsook any sort of decency and partook a mating display in full view of the public. And it wasn’t too much longer before others joined in this debaucherous action.
Males fighting over females for the chance to mate, pairs engaging in mating acts regardless of setting, their minds fixated on baser instincts. Though as bad as it seemed, there was a shining ray of light in the midst of this chaos. It didn’t seem to affect those in an established relationship with another. Fillies and colts seemed unaffected by it as well. There was, another curiosity… There were a small number of ponies not meeting these criteria that weren’t affected by the spell.
And that’s the part where I come in. Having served as one of Mayor Mare’s secretaries, I was trained to handle crisis situations. I herded up those unaffected and had families escorted to their homes, under the orders that they should refrain from leaving their homes until this incident passed. I then took it upon myself to appoint these ponies to vital positions to keep some semblance of structure and order to the town.
With the system working as intended, I took a moment to study the situation. The air hung thick with a smell that I could only call the “essence of ponies”. To describe it in detail, I could do it no justice. Ponies walking about, in search of a mate, flaunting their genetalia in a salacious and indecent manner. If two or more males found the same female, they would fight over her, and to the victor, goes the mate. After a while, they calm a bit, usually long enough for them to find some food or drink, and it’s back to the pattern of this lascivious behavior. Such an appalling display. How base, how animalistic. Truly, a disgusting sight. Uh, but I digress.
I’d hoped the spells effects would wear off soon, but as the daylight hours dwindled, and the sun retreated beyond the western horizon, I had my doubts it would. And so I amended my previous plan. Those taking shelter in their homes were urged to continue staying inside their homes until an all-clear signal was given. And that should the need supplies, they were to hang a card which I distributed to them all in a front window, indicating their need of assistance. With the night upon us, everypony headed home, hopeful that the incident was behind us.
However, come morning, my worst fears were realized as I laid eyes on the sights of Ponyville, the majority of its populous engaged in the same acts as the day prior. With this aside, I pulled the ponies together to discuss the changes I’d made. More specifically, the amends to some of their schedules. Those with positions that didn’t require much effort were to take shifts patrolling the streets, on the lookout for those cards. Should they spot one, they are to knock on the door, ascertain what the needs are, and to get the information to somepony who can help them.
My plan was quite efficient. Being the secretary to the mayor, I patrolled Ponyville more than most. With the mayor… indisposed… at the moment, there wasn’t much in the way of mayoral duties for me to assist with. This left most of my time being devoted to volunteering with what needs were most critical. I also acted as leader, keeping everypony organized and all affairs in order.
It took nearly a month for the spell’s effects to subside. And not a moment too soon. Food and medical supplies were running critically low, and we didn’t have the horsepower to match the demand. With the fog lifted from everypony’s minds, they seemed to be in full remembrance of their prior actions. Oh, the sight the moment it faded. One could have drowned in the sea of red and deluge of apologies. I’d held quite a high degree of curiosity why there were some not affected by the spell. I’d taken the time to question those immune to its effects. Responses were varied, but all shared one common trait: a lack of interest in mating. In hindsight, it should have been obvious. Can’t magnify a desire that isn’t there to begin with. Guess I could call myself lucky to have not been involved in that indecency. Or am I not? ...Getting off-topic again.
It had other unforeseen consequences, ones that weren’t readily apparent until much later after the incident. There was a small population boom in births that year, and proving lineage was… difficult, to say the least. To say any more, it was a mind-bendingly frustrating exercise in discovering my absolute limits. Not that I’m bitter or anything.
Months passed, and no sign of the spell’s return. Many had believed we were finally in the clear. However, Princess Twilight has recently made a discovery of the spell’s impending resurgence. Preparations are being made for what we’re coming to call “mating season” as I write this. I even took the opportunity to draw up my plans from last year as a proposal to present to the mayor. It was met with immediate approval and was put into action. The Atypical Containment Event Act (possibly pending a name change, on the grounds of being up at some horrendous hour working on a town law is non conducive to creativity) should hopefully be more prepared to deal with the situation this time around, especially considering we can anticipate it.
To those of you reading this, my name is Faded Lines, and I write this in the event Princess Twilight is unable to find a solution, should future generations require this information. Attached, you should find detailed notes taken from this newest incident, written to the best of my abilities. And perhaps a few third-party accounts, should it serve to to help recognize ponies fit for job.
