The Crazy Life Of James Sparkle

by __Jake101__

Rating: everyone
Tags: Human, Comedy
Length: 6557

You are James Sparkle, and this is your crazy life.

You are James Sparkle, the only human in Equestria. You were found by Twilight Sparkle at the age of eight, not knowing anything about your family or friends, or anything about home. You also only knew your first name, James. You are now twelve, and things have been, well, crazy lately.

[spoiler]Note: This Story Is In A Very Different Universe From My Other HiE Series, Lost.[/spoiler]

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2015-02-21 22:48:14 UTC

Chapter 1

"James! Wake up! School starts in a few hours!"

You are James Sparkle. You can't remember anything about your family or friends from Earth. You arrived just outside Twilight Sparkles doorstep when you were eight, and by arrived I mean unconscious on the ground, and became her adopted son. You were homeschooled until this year. This is your first day of school, and since you didn't have any real good friends except Pinkie Pie and Spike, Twilight, or as she wants you to call her, 'Mom' wanted you to make some more friends.

"Ugh Mom! It's five A.M.! School doesn't start til eight!"

You were about as tall as most mares in Ponyville, but with your mom being an alicorn, you were up to her nose. Fillies and colts around your age were about just above your knees.

"I am your mother, and I say get up and get ready for school!"

You groaned in frustration. "Fine! I'm getting up!" You climb out of bed and put on my clothes. A simple red tee shirt, some jeans, and socks and shoes. You head to the bathroom to brush your teeth. Your mom had once gave you a highly detailed lecture about how important dental higene was and even brought a dentist, Colgate you think her name was, who had shown you high definition pictures of what could happen if you didn't brush your teeth. It scarred you so bad that you actually vowed to never, ever, EVER go a day without brushing in the morning and at night. And you were doing a pretty good job at keeping to your vow.

Afterwards you ate breakfast, a bowl of cereal, and got your backpack ready. It was really just half of a saddle bag with an extended strap attached to it on both ends so you could hoist the bag over your shoulder.

You spend the next two hours staring out the window on the second floor. Your mom comes up and sits next to you.

"Hey, James? Anything wrong?"

"Nope. Just bored." You say as you hop off the bed and walk downstairs.

"Well, it just seemed as if something was bothering you since you were staring out the window for two hours."

"Hey Mom? Shouldn't we be heading to School by now? It's seven thirty already."

She giggled. "Oh, we can be there right now if you'd like." You are enveloped in a bright flash as you feel the ground change from hardwood flooring to soft grass. You look around and see a large building that you assume to be the School in the distance, along with fillies and colts along with their parents heading towards the building.

"Well, go on! The schoolhouse isn't coming to us!" Your mom nudged you forward. "James? Anything wrong?"

You hate to admit it, but you were scared out of your mind. You started thinking about how the others would react to you, and how they may start making fun of you. You thought about how much you'd stick out and how different you would be from everypony else. Yeah, your mom got the terms 'anypony', 'nopony', 'somepony', and 'everypony' stuck in your head like glue.

You snapped back into reality once your mom yelled your name. "Wha- huh? Oh...oh y-yeah yeah I'll see you later! B-by mom. Love you!" You yell as you make your way towards the schoolyard.

As you pass the gates, you can literally feel everyponies eyes on you. Sure, they have heard of you and may have even seen you a couple times, but they probably wouldn't expect you to be here. You see a purple mare, obviously the teacher, head your way.

"Why hello there!" She says. "My name is Miss Cherilee! You must be James Sparkle. Twilight has told me some things about you. But first, let's get you settled in."

You follow her inside the building next to one of the many empty desks. It was a desk in the third row, and the third desk from the left end. You set down your backpack next to the seat and look around. Only a couple fillies and colts, all of which are staring. At you.

"Is anypony else coming?" You ask nervously.

"Yes, the others are outside. Class starts in a few minutes, so they should be coming inside very soon."

You look around the room for a while until the bell rings, causing you to jump a little. You watch as the room floods with fillies and colts as they hurry to their seats. You squeeze into your seat too, and surprisingly, you can actually fit in it. You watch as a brown colt with a red and yellow beanie sits to your left. His beanie has a green propeller that doesn't seem to stop spinning.

To your right sits a grey fancy looking fillie that is chatting away with a pink fillie that is wearing a tiara. The pink one looks up at you, glaring. Her friend looks too.

Then the pink one scoffs. "Oh look. The hairless monkey is here!" She bursts out laughing, and most of the other students look at you and start laughing as well. You can see three fillies, an orange pegasus with a scruffy purple mane, a soft yellow earth pony with a red mane and giant pink bow, and a white unicorn with a purple and pink mane, all glaring at the two stuck up brats next to you.

"Alright that is enough!" You hear Miss Cherilee's voice yell. Everypony turns and looks at the teacher. "Diamond Tiara, you haven't even met our new student yet, and already you're making fun of him! I am going to have to talk to your parents after school."

"Serves you right" you think to yourself.

"Alright, now would you like to come up in front of the class and introduce yourself?" Miss Cherilee asks you.

You slowly nod while getting up from your desk and make your way to the chalkboard, facing the other students. "I- I'm James Sparkle. Th-this is my first y-year of school, since I was homeschooled. I have been here in Equestria for four years and I don't remember much of m-my old home, except that it wasn't the best. If you didn't know already, I am the o-only human in Eq-Equestria. And um......yeah.....that's about it and....um......I'll just....head back to my seat now......" You say as you make your way back to your seat. You swear you heard a few students giggling, but you can't say you blame them. If something like that happened back on Earth, the other students would probably do the same thing.

"Alright students. Now, first lets talk about...

After a long, boring time of talking about Ponyville history, most of which you knew of since Twi- 'Mom' taught you while you were homeschooled, the bell rang, indicating that it was time to head outside for lunch. You grab a brown bag out of your backpack and head outside along with everypony else.

You saw how all the tables were filled instantly. All except one. One a bit farther away from the others. You went over to sit at that table to eat. Once you sit down, you rummage through the bag. An apple, a bottle of water, pb & j, and that cupcake that Pinkie Pie snuck in for you.

"Thank you Pinkie." You mumble to you yourself as you devour the sweet. After you eat it, you notice something. A vaguely familiar beeping noise...that sounded like.....a....video game! You duck down under the table. Sure enough, there's that same brown colt from before playing on a small device that reads 'JoyBoy' across the top.

You smirk. "Watchya playin?" You say. Almost instantly, the colt yelps and bounces into the air, hitting his head on the table.

"Don't do that!" He says as he looks right into my face.

He gets up from under the table and sits next to me.

"But seriously, what are you playing?" You ask him.

"Equine Kombat. It just came out for the JoyBoy and it is amazing! Oh yeah, my name is Button Mash by way."

He looks straight ahead, his face full of fear. "Oh no. It's them! Don't do anything dumb, trust me! You'll regret it if you do...."

What was he talking ab-......oh no. The pink and grey fillies from before are headed towards our table.

The pink one speaks first. "So, why are you even here? Are you just trying to get me in trouble?"

"Wait, what? I didn't even do anything! You're the one who called me a hairless monkey!"

"Well I wouldn't have if you didn't even come here! And now because of you, I am going to be in big trouble with my parents!"

You shrug. "Not my parents, not my problem." You reach over and pick up your peanut butter and jelly sandwich.

"Well at least I know my parents!"

That last sentence makes you drop your sandwich. "What did you just say?" You speak through grinding teeth.

Chapter 2

While most of the students left for the day, you and this brat named Diamond Tiara had to stay afterschool since you both got into a fight. You sat at your desk as you waited for your mom to come.

The door swung open, and your mom and a very fancy looking stallion (so fancy you have the sudden urge to push him into a heaping pile of shi-oops mud, mud, you mean mud) walk up to the teacher. You can hear them whisper something, but you aren't sure what they're saying, really.

"Bullying...........stop it............major......cutie mark crusaders? Silver sp-..............tag along............bad influence.........."

They turn to you and Diamond Tiara. You are bored outta your mind, while DT just has her head down with her hooves covering her face. Your mom walks up to you and takes you outside. She does not look happy.

"Fighting? On the first day? I thought I taught you better! I want to hear your side of the story. Tell the truth, because I can tell if you're lying or not."

You take deep breath. "Okay, so after I met this colt named Button Mash at lunch, Diamond Tiara and the other one came to our table and started yelling at me for getting her in trouble earlier with her parents, when she called me a hairless monkey! Then, when I said 'not my parents, not my problem,' she said 'at least I know my parents' and I just may or may not have kind of maybe sorta accidentally possibly lost it and grabbed her by the mane ready to punch her in the face."

"Ugh...Really James? Well, at least we know what happened." Your mom says. "But that doesn't mean that you are still not in big trouble. No going to Sugarcube Corner for a week!"

You groan. You loved going to that place and help bake with Pinkie Pie, and since it was Pinkie you were baking with, the cake actually tasted like cake, and not like a bunch of rocks were dumped into a cake when Spike made a cake. He put actual jems in them! You can still hardly believe that dragon actually eats jems.

  "Now, let's go home. I'm sure that Miss Cherilee can handle things by herself now. Are you sure that you have all of your homework?"

"Yes mom." You say in a very depressed tone. You are once again enveloped in a blinding flash of light as you are inside the tree....library......you're still not sure what you actually live in.

You walk up to your bedroom and sit on the bed as you pull out your homework. A few simple math problems and an assignment about a special moment in your life. Luckily, it was something you didn't have to read in front of the class, because you had hardly anything. Just study, play with Pinkie Pie and Spike for a few hours, once helped bake the worlds largest cake....................wait..............you helped bake the worlds largest cake!

After you got the math problems done, which were simple addition and a multiplication problem, you already were halfway through with writing the assignment.

30 MINUTES LATER

"James! Dinner!"

"Coming!" You yell. As you make your way downstairs, you remember to put your homework in your backpack. As you sit down at the table, you ask Twilight something.

"Hey Mom, remember that one colt I told you about earlier?"

"Button Mash? Yeah, I remember. Why?" She says as she sets your food down. Spaghetti.  Your favorite.

"Well, me and him were wondering if I could go to his house sometime later."

Your mom gasped. "You made a friend on your very first day? Ooh! I'm so happy! I didn't think that you would make any other friends this soon!"

"Uhm....okay? Can I go to his house after dinner then?"

She just nodded her head since her mouth was full of spaghetti. Dinner ended quickly since you were scarfing down the spaghetti like mad.

Button Mash told you where his house was, and surprisingly, it was right across from your home library/tree thing. You are about to knock on the door when it swings open, and Button Mash is standing right in front of you, wearing a fake moustache.

"Come." Is all he says as he gestures you to come inside. You follow him inside the house as he leads you to a bedroom. It is very....gamey? You can't really describe it. It just looks like a bunch of video game stuff.

Then suddenly, the lights go off. You hear whispering and shuffling noises. A few seconds later, three flashlights go off all at once, facing away from you, revealing Button Mash in the center. To his right is a grey pegasus colt who has a black mane. They both are wearing fake moustaches.

You just stood there, dumbfounded. You didn't know how you should react to this.

Button Mash stepped forth. "If you wish to be a part of our group, then you must pass the initiation. Don this moustache to join our group," He handed me a fake moustache. "But be warned, only the strongest of-"

"Done!" You yell as you put the moustache on. "So...what now?"

"Do you feel any different?" The grey pegasus colt asks you.

You rub your nose a bit. "I feel kinda older......I think?"

Button Mash smiled. "Then the affects are already working..." He said evilly before returning to his old tone.  "Now come on! Let's play some video games! Oh, this is Rumble!"

"Hey Rumble! So, what kind of games ya got?" You say, not even bothering to take off the moustache.

"I was thinking that we could play some Manecraft! Whatdya say?"

"Yussssssss!" Rumble hissed.

"Sure. I'll play." You reply. You aren't entirely sure what Manecraft is since your mom won't let you get a TV and console, or a JoyBoy at least because she thinks that you'll be glued to it all night long and not get enough sleep.

Button Mash is getting your profile ready so you can play with them. "Alright, so what you like your profilename to be?"

"Hmm.........lets see........lowercase x - capital x - capital J - a - m - e - s - capital x - and lowercase x." You respond. xXJamesXx.

Chapter 3

You are sprinting through the woods, zombies, skeletons,  and an endermare hot on your tail. You are running low on food, and your health isn't doing well. You have been running for a short while now, and you can see a light from a torch in the distance. A light from a torch that signals shelter. A small wooden shack, not the best shelter. Right when you step inside, you hear a soft 'click!' followed by a hissing sound. As soon as you entered, you are engulfed in a ginormous explosion. The screen goes red, reading these words. you died!

"Are you kidding me?!" You yell in frustration as Rumble is laughing his head off. "What's so funny, Rumble?"

"I cannot believe you ran into my trap shelter! Hahahahahahahaaaa!!!! Oh Celestia I think I'm crying!" He laughed as he rubbed a tear from his eye with a hoof.

"Haha laugh it up. Oh hey Rumble your food meter is empty." You say looking to his screen.

"What?!" He yelled as he  started dying. You sat there laughing as he started to starve to death. However, while I was doing this, you failed to notice Button Mash luring a pack of creepers my way. When you looked back to the screen, you were surrounded by creepers closing in on my position.  Before you could even react, you were blown to bits by the green creatures.

Button Mash's door opened, and his mom came in. "Hey, James. Your mother called. She said it's time for you to go home now."

You got up and reached for the fake moustache. "Here you go-"

"No, no, no. You're part of the group now. You keep it." Button Mash said, cutting me off.

You shrug it off. "Alright. See ya!"

"Bye James!" The two colts said.

You walk outside, which was pretty dark, and while heading towards your home you feel a sudden surge of pain from the back of your head, followed by a 'gong!' noise. You plummet to the ground, landing face first. You are now getting dragged by something, but you can't tell what it is. Your vision goes blury, and then everyhing goes black.

You wake up, with leather straps holding you down in a chair, in a very dark room. The only source of light is a light bulb above your head. There is a weird helmet on your head, with wires connected to it leading somewhere in the darkness.

"Hello?" You call out. "Anypony there? Mom?" You regret saying that last sentence. Why would Mom have put you in the situation you're in now? Because of that, you mentally slap yourself. You struggle a bit, trying to loosen the straps, only to be rewarded with a golden aura surrounding the straps, tightening them.

You look up for a moment and see a shadowy figure resembling a unicorn. It moves closer, revealing a mint green body with golden eyes, and a blue mane with a white streak. It appears to be a mare as well.

"Who are you? Where am I?!" You ask the her.

She giggles. "Oh, you do not know how long I have been waiting for this moment. Now, just sit still while I run these completely harmless tests on you."

You don't like the way she said 'completely harmless' to you. The light above your head shuts off, and two blinding spotlights come to life directed at you, causing you to wince at the sudden and harsh light.

Once your vision returns, you look around the now dimly lit room. You find the unicorn writing something down while looking at the screen of a large machine connected to the same wires attached to the weird helmet you have on. You see a table straight across from you, with a closed toolbox and then...... these next two scare you.......scalpels......and syringes.

She looks over to you and sees your expression, then looks over to the table and laughs. "Don't worry! I just forgot to put those away from one of my.........previous studies.............you'll be fine.........hopefully......"

She looks back over to the screen, writing down something. "Alright....now, we just pull this and..." She pulls down on a lever, and you feel a strong stinging sensation in your head, and you silently scream, clenching your eyes shut and grinding your teeth.

"I thought you said they were harmless!" You yell.

"Shhhhhhhh! Be quiet! I don't want Bon Bon to hear!" She whispered/yelled.

Your head wasn't stinging as bad as before, but it hurt pretty bad still. "Ain't Bon Bon that one mare who works at the candy store?"

She nodded her head.

You take a deep breath, ready to yell, but before you can, Lyra puts her hoof over your mouth. "If you even dare..." Her horn was surrounded by a golden aura as a scalpel from the table flew up in front of your face, giving you the message as your eyes widen.

"Now, sit still and be quiet while I continue these tests, then you can leave. Got it?"

You slowly nod your head, never taking your eyes off of the blade levitating in front of your face.

"Good." She sets the scalpel back onto the table as she heads back to the weird machine. You see some sort of keyboard appear from a slot in the machine,  and she starts typing something on it while whispering to herself.

"alright......subject status.............continuing test.............doing fine so far......................test complete............................going to retrieve blood sample....................................make sure to put tape on mouth to muffle screaming.................okay......aaaaaaaand...............done!"

What you were able to make out from her whispering frightened you......allot... She walks up to you with tape levitating beside her. It flies toward you and sticks right on target, covering your mouth entirely.

She levitates a syringe from the table and brings it to your arm. "Alright, this might hurt a bit." You notice that there is a liquid in the syringe already.

You try to kick you legs, but they are held down by the leather straps. You start to scream, but it's muffled by the piece of tape over your mouth. You stick out your tongue, licking the edges of the tape until it becomes unstuck and hangs off of your mouth.

"SOMEPONY ANYPONY HELP ME THIS MARE'S CRAZY HELP ME PLE-"

You are interrupted by the syringe being jammed into your arm, making you very tired and weak as the unicorn had just drugged you.

The last thing you remember seeing is a light coming from an open door, and a pony standing there with a shocked expression on her face.

Chapter 4

You awake to the sound of two mares talking. Their voices are muffled at first because one of them drugged you, and your mind is still a bit groggy.

"Lyra, do you realize just how big this is?" A cream colored mare with blue and pink mane asked. You recognize her to be Bon Bon, the mare who works at the candy store.

"No." The unicorn said with a blank expression. "Explain to me just how doing research on a human is a big deal."

Bon Bon facehoofed. "When you foalnap Princess Twilight Sparkles adopted son to do research on him, then it's a big deal. I can hardly imagine what will happen to us if she finds out! Even though you did this, I live with you! I'll be a suspect! Then, when they find out you foalnapped him, then they'll believe that I helped and......and.........." she almost burst into tears before turning to you. She wraps her forehooves around you, crying. "Please please please don't turn me iiiiiihihiiiinnnn!!!!!!! I'm a good mare! Sh-she's the crazy one! Turn her in, not me pleeeeeeeeeeeese!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

You are still trying to figure out just what is going on, and still strapped to the chair with the helmet on, you can only sit there and watch everything unfold with a 'what-the-hay-just-happened?' expression.

The doors swing open, and two guards are there.....and your mom..... She flies at you pushing Bon Bon out of the way, and undos the straps. Right when you stand up, your mom squeezes you hard enough to break a rib or two, and is sobbing hard while you see them put some type of ring on the unicorn's horn and put cuffs on her.

You see one of the gaurds head towards Bon Bon with hoofcuffs floating in the air next to him. "Wait." You call out. "She didn't do a thing, just the unicorn."

He nods and walks back to his partner, taking the unicorn away.

Your mom suddenly bombards you with questions. "Did she hurt you? What was she planning to do? Are you alright? Do you mind if I kill her when she gets out of jail? Do you need me to get you anything?"

You take a deep breath. "Yes, I don't know, I am now, yes I would mind allot, and can I have my very own JoyBoy?"

She glares at you.

"Alright. No JoyBoy." You sigh.

You and your mom head up the stairs out of the basement. You are in somepony's house, obviously the unicorns, and head back home. It was almost 3 A. M., so before doing anything else, you tear your clothes off (leaving your boxers on of course) and literally jump in bed.

4 HOURS OF SLEEP LATER

"James! Get up! School starts in an hour!"

You check your alarm clock. Seven. "Well that's new." You mumble to yourself. She let you sleep in for once. SHE NEVER LETS YOU SLEEP IN! Well, it makes sense actually, because of what had happened last night.

You get out of bed and put your clothes on. Same as yesterday, except now your wearing a plain green tee-shirt. You head to the bathroom when you realize something.

"Hey Mom? Where'd Spike go?"

"Oh he went to the Crystal Empire again. I thought I told you this the day he left?"

"Oh yeah." You whisper to yourself as you brush your teeth. You do the normal routine as always. By the time it's seven thirty, you are ready.

"Alright, I'll see you later James! But remember, no fighting. Got it?" Your mom says.

"Yes Mom. I won't fight today." You deadpan.

"Good. Bye James!"

"See ya!" You yell as you make your way towards the gates. As soon as you pass them, you are swarmed by fillies and colts, all cheering.

"Yay! We're saved! No mo DT! Yay! Woohoo!" They shout. You are very, very confused.

"What's going on?" You ask Rumble, who has flown up and placed a paper mache crown on top of your head.

"Well, since none of us were as brave as you to stand up to Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon like that, everypony here now hopes that because of you, we will no longer be bullied by them!" He says.

You look around. Practically every single filly and colt is around you cheering. "Look, I appreciate everything you are all doing, but...." You say as you reach for the crown and hand it back to Rumble. "I just want to be treated like anypony else here. All you need to do next time somepony bullies you is tell an adult, like a teacher or parent. Don't try doing what I did to Diamond Tiara, because I did the stupid thing. Got it?"

They all nod their heads. You saw two colts in the back crying, a short stubby blue grey colt with orange mane, and a tall skinny orange colt with a green mane.

"That was so beautiful!" The smaller one says.

"Bravo! Bravo!" The taller colt yells, clapping his hooves.

You stare at the two with a raised eyebrow. "Oooooookaaaaaaaaay?"

The bell rings, and everypony heads inside. You sit down in your seat, and when you glance over to your right, you see them quickly looking back to the front.

You turn your head back to Button Mash. "Look. They're scared of me." You whisper to him.

He snickers as he sees the two shivering in fear as you look back at them.

"Alright class! Take out your homework!" Miss Cherilee yells. She goes around the class room, collecting everypony's homework.

You open up your bag and take out your homework as she nears your table. You feel something poke your left side.

"Psst! James!" Button Mash whispers. "I forgot to do my math homework. Can I copy off yours ple-"

"Button Mash! Are you trying to copy off of James?!" The teacher yells, now in front of my desk.

"N-no Miss Cherilee! I- I was just asking for a pencil since I can't find mine."

She pointed towards Button's desk. "It's right in front of you, on your desk."

He looks down. Then, he pushes the pencil off. "No it isn't."

Miss  Cherilee facehoofed. "Button Mash. You have to remember to do your homework from now on. If you don't, I'm going to have to start calling home, got it?"

He just simply nodded as Miss Cherilee took my homework and Button's written assignment.

SOME LONG BORING HOURS LATER

Just one more minute til the bell rings. C'mon.......so......close..... I can't wait any longer. This is soooooo boooring!!! I. CAN'T.  SIT. HERE. ANY. LONG-

  The bell rung so sudden, almost everypony jumped and ran outside. You stayed behind however, because Button had fallen asleep for two hours and you and Rumble were the only two who stayed inside to wake him up.

You nudged him a couple times. "Button. Button Mash. Wake up!"

"Mhu umm uh....mmm...apple juice....." He mumbled.

Rumble tried this time by actually shaking him. "Button Mash! Waaake uuuuup!"

"Uhmmm mah.....ha huuu.....ha......level up....."

I facepalmed. Rumble had an idea and leaned close to Button's ear and whispered. "Button Mash.......James just ask Sweetiebelle out on a date...."

"Wait what?" I asked, but before he could react, Button's eyes shot open.

"WHAT?!?!" He yelled, looking at me with anger.

"Button, Button! Chill! Chill! He never did, I just said that to wake you up!" Rumble said, hold Button Mash back as he started swatting his hooves at me.

"Wait what?  Oh..... Sorry 'bout that James." He said as Rumble let go of him.

We went outside, and while Rumble and Button Mash sat at the same table you did yesterday, you headed over to a different table. One where Diamond Tiara and the other one, which your guessing is Silver Spoon, seemed to be bullying the three fillies that had glared at them yesterday.

You quietly walked up behind them. Luckily, the sun was facing you so your shadow was hidden out of sight. They kept on mocking the three fillies, not noticing you at all. The three saw you, but acted like you weren't there.

You tapped on DT's shoulder, and she replied turning around with a bratty "What?" When she saw you, she froze and her pupils became pinprick sized dots, same as Silver Spoon's.

You lean down close to them, smirking. "Is there a problem here girls?"

"N-n-n-no nononono nope no problem here....hehe...." Diamond Tiara said.

"Y-y-y-y-y-y-yeah.....N-n-n-no problem here or anyw-where......." Silver Spoon replied.

You chuckled. "Really? Because, it looked like you were bothering these three innocent fillies."

They shrank as you leaned a bit closer. "Please don't hurt us." DT whimpered, both of them shivering in fear.

You laughed. "Now why would I hurt you? I got grounded for a week when I tried to punch you in the face, so do you really think that I would hurt you?"

They started to laugh a bit. "Well, now that you mention it, it does seem pretty stupid!"

We laughed for a short while before you took on a serious look and said, "I'll do much more than hurt you..."

The two ran away screaming as you laughed hard. You turn back to the three,  standing up, after you managed to stop laughing for a moment. "You alright?"

The orange pegasus spoke first. "Yeah, we're alright. I'm Scootaloo!"

"Ahm Applebloom!" The soft yellow earth pony said.

"And I'm Sweetiebelle!" The unicorn chimed.

"Hey! James! C'mon, Button has something to show you!" Rumble yelled as he ran up to me. "It's really important! Come on!"

After you say goodbye to the three, you head over to Button Mash.

"So, what's up?" You ask him as you sit down next to him.

He pulls you in close to his face. "Don't. Even. Dare. Try. Anything. Around. Sweetiebelle. She. Is. Mine."

"Oooookaaaaay?" Is all you can say.

"She's Button's marefriend, and he's afraid that you might be flirtin' with 'er." Rumble says as he pulls out a JoyBoy and begins playig on it.

You stare at him sith a shocked expression. "Dude. This is my second day here, and you think that already I'm going to be hittin' on a filly? The only fillies I knew before were DT and Silver Spoon, and I just now met those other three and you're afraid that I'll be stealing your marefriend? Seriously?"

"Well....now that you mention it. Nevermind." He says, taking a sip from a box of apple juice.

You took out your lunch and continued to eat it as well, not realizing the crazy unicorn mare that escaped from jail and is going to get what she wants is stalking you.

Chapter 5

The bell rings once again, signalling that it's time to go back inside the schoolhouse. You, Button Mash, and Rumble all throw away whatever's left of your lunch and go back inside. As you all sit back in your seats, Miss Cherilee writes something down on the chalkboard.

"Alright students, now, most of you know that today we..."

SOME MORE VERY, VERY BORING AND LONG HOURS LATER

As the final bell rings and everypony rushes outside to go home, you and Rumble once again have to stay inside to wake Button up. Why did he sleep so much today, you have no idea. He possibly spent most of last night playing videogames, since you remember a light from his house still on when you went home earlier at, like, 3 A.M.

"Button, wake up! Schools over!" You yell.

Right when you see Rumble lean over to his ear, you stop him. "Rumble! Don't do that again! I don't want to actually get hit this time!"

"Hey, chill! I wasn't going to tell him that again! He never falls for the same thing two times in a row. I would know."

"Alright." You reply. "What were you going to say then?"

"That you stole his JoyBoy."

Button's eyes shoot open once again, and he lunges at you. You manage to dodge just in time. Button lands just outside of the building, and gets covered in dirt and grass. He gets up and goes back inside to collect his things.

"Oh, it's right here." He says, holding up his JoyBoy. "Wait, did I fall asleep again?"

You and Rumble both nod.

"And did Rumble say that just to get me up?"

You nod and lightly kick Rumble with the side of your leg, knocking him away from you a couple inches. He glares at you, but you don't pay any attention to him.

You head outside, Button and Rumble following. They go one way while you stay around the outskirts of the schoolyard, looking for your mom.

You see her, finally, and quickly walk over to her.

"Hey Mom!" You say. "Where were you?"

"Oh...sorry about that. I just lost track of time while studying." She responds. "Come on. Let's go home."

You are engulfed in a flash of light, waiting to finally go home. Right when you appear in your home, you see Spike rush to Mom.

"Twilight! Important message from Princess Celestia!" He handed a letter to Mom.

Once she was finished reading it, she turns to you. "Alright. You're ungrounded. Why don't you go stay at Pinkie's for a while?" She spoke quickly. Must be really urgent for me to get ungrounded when it's been only two days.

"Okay?" Is all you can say. "See you later.....I guess?"

She teleports away quickly. You look at Spike questioningly, and he just shrugs.

You head over to Sugarcube Corner to see if Pinkie is there. Sure enough, she is. And she is covered in flour.

"Is everything alright? I can come back later if you're-"

She cuts you off. "No...I'm just babysitting the babies again. It seems like the only thing that'll make them happy is this."

You try and stifle a laugh. "I can help watch over th-"

"OH THANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOU!!!!!!!!!!!" Pinkie yells, squeezing you tight......and covering you with flour.

"Alright then. So....where are they?" You ask.

Her eyes shoot open. "*Gasp*! They're gone! Oh no! If they're gone then Mr. and Mrs. Cake will be mad at me for losing them! And if they get mad at me for losing them, then I can't babysit them anymore! And if they get even madder, I'll probably lose my job! And if they get madderer, then I'll have to move out of Ponyville! And if I have to move out of Ponyville, then there won't be anymore parties! And if there aren't any more parties..."

"Pinkie-" You try and cut her off.

"THEN PONYVILLE WILL BE BORING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

"Pinkie!"

"I CAN'T LET THAT HAPPEN!!!!!!!!! JAMES!!! WE NEED TO FIND THOSE BABIES OR ELSE MR. AND MRS. CAKE WILL GET SO MAD THAT I'LL LOSE MY JOB AND I'LL HAVE TO MOVE OUT OF PONYVILLE AND-"

"PINKIE PIE!!!" You yell a bit louder then you were aiming for. "Calm down! They're right there!" You point under a table. And sure enough, Pound Cake and Pumpkin Cake are eating a pie under the table.

She stares at them for a while. "Oh.......sorry about that. I guess I just overreacted a little."

You cross your arms and raise an eyebrow. "A little? Right..."

"Alright...I overreacted allot."

You look at the foals for a while, then back at Pinkie. Or at least, a pile of flour that used to be Pinkie. She somehow moved under the table with them and starting eating the pie also without you seeing.

THE NEXT DAY

You wake up on the floor of Pinkie's room. She has collapsed on the bed, asleep, as well as the babies.

You make your way downstairs and outside of Sugarcube Corner. You see the clock tower reading eight, yet it's still very dark out. Weird. When you reach home and open the door, you see a table in the middle of the room, a lantern sitting on the table, and books everywhere, but no Mom.

"Mom?" You yell. "Spike. Anypony here?" No answer. You head over to a big book on the table and see a bookmark in it. You open up to the page with the bookmark. "Lord Tirek? What's this" You see a picture of a large centaur looking thing on the right page, and on the left page are just words. You continue reading about it for about five minutes.

"Phht. Yeah right. Like a large centaur demon thing is actually going to come and destroy us all. What a waist of time. I wonder why Mom would even have this book. It's not like anypony would actually believe this stuff."

You slam the book shut, kinda hard actually, and hear a scream, as well as a large thud coming from upstairs. Rushing upstairs, you see Mom on the ground, awake, and her bed sheets messed up.

"Morning Mom! Hey, why isn't the sun up yet? It's eight o' clock, right Or is that giant clock tower broken?"

Her eyes shoot open. "Oh no! The sun! I forgot to ra- I mean....uhm.......I gotta go!" She goes out onto the balcony and unfolds her wings. She flaps them just once, and is thrown high into the air with a sparkly trail behind her.

"Okay then? Goodbye?" You swear that some things get stranger everyday, and this is a perfect example.