Cannerlands

Rocks. Rocks and sand. Rocks, sand, and dust.

That was all I could see for miles beyond my passenger window. I leaned my head against it, hot breaths fogging it up. This plan to leave my mom was dumb. This yellow train was dumb. This window with enough dirt and dust to make a small dirt castle with it was dumb.

I was on a train that was headed to the very edge of the world that I knew. We were passing through zebra territory, or more so it was in the zebra homeland. For any species to call this their territory must be dead by the point they finished the sentence. My mouth felt dry just imagining how dry it was really out there. Was that what the other side of the Border held for me? I knew that ponies said it was completely impossible to grow in the Cannerlands, but this was ridiculous.

*SNORE*

What's more ridiculous was this snoring. I was so tempted to stand up, trot on over to the 'slightly' overweight pony and shove that pillow that he's drooling all over down his over sized gullet. I mean, it totally had enough lubricant at this point. It would have been so easy.

It has only been one day and already I wanted to back down and pretend I never took a step out of my mom's house. I didn't know what was worse, this pony's snoring or my mother's high expectations. Ask me in a few minutes and I'll probably still say my mother's high expectations, but there will be one more duck taped pony than there was in the train car.

I take a deep breath and run my dark watermelon green hoof through my slightly darker green mane. I look in the window and I see my reflection. My nose a little bit rounder than most mares I'd have to say, my light blue eyes seemed to have matched perfectly with my green coat and green mane. I knock my head on the window, closing my eyes and asking myself over and over in a crazy mantra, "Why are you doing this Kale? Why?"

Okay Kale, get ahold of yourself. You can do this. Plant some kale in Cannerlands, prove some idiots wrong, get paid lots and lots of bits, and profit.

*SNORE*

FUCK!

Alright, alright, let's reflect a little bit. That always calms you down Kales. Let's start over from the beginning, I feel that I might confuse someponies if I don't.

I'm on my way to the Cannerlands, a place filled with bandits, outlaws, and other socially awkward ponies. Ponies usually find refuge on the other side of the Border, which was a huge wall built inside a giant mountain, built to keep any dangerous pony from getting into Equestria. And I bought a one way train ticket to the same destination. What in Celestia's pure golden sun was I thinking?

First off, let me introduce myself. My name is Kale, yes just like the green plant that looks like green crap and tastes like heaven. I come from a family that I don't particularly enjoy being around. My brother is the super successful and is always a condescending to his family type of guy. My mom is a loving, respectful member of the community that is an overbearing parent that thinks I'm a robot supposed to bend to her every whim. Oh, you discovered a cure for death? Better also discover a cure for old age Kaley, we all know you can do better blah blah blah I am using you to make myself feel better as a parent blah blah blah. Seriously, I can't stand her shit half the time. She's so self righteous that it made me want to blog about it. And I hate blogging. Then there's my dad, the one who gave me this idea in the first place.

I'll be the first to say, cliche. My father ran out on my family to go look for treasure in the Cannerlands. In the history books, it was said that there were little burials around the Cannerlands called Troves. Troves were supposed to contain lots of treasure beyond a pony's wildest dreams. And for a time, he was rather successful, or he was supposedly. I mean, he paid his child support on time like any other regular parent would, but then he stopped sending bits. At first my mom said it was only because dad was having a tough time with his adventures, but then he eventually stopped writing altogether. We waited for a good three weeks before my mother accepted the fact that he died. Later on as I grew up, the more believable story was that he disappeared in Las Haygas, found some tramp and got hitched. Look, I'm not saying I remember much of my father, but I see pictures of him sometimes and I gotta admit that even "I" would have made fun of him in high school. But that's neither here nor there, I'm following in his supposed hoofsteps to Cannerlands, although my plan is to do other things out in the Cannerlands. Other things that don't involve being an idiotic blood thirsty Trove Hunter.

My mother was a famous veggie grower. Her name was... well, her name isn't important. A very famous farm pony who grew up on malsupported farming ground. She was able to grow on this ground and became well renowned for it. She was able to grow everywhere and I mean EVERYWHERE. But I always felt like I had to follow her example, living to fill my mom's shadow. And I hated that.

So, you can clearly see why I'd want to strike away from my mother. Make my own success, make my own story where ponies all over Equestria would buy my self help books. I would be swimming in bits by the time I come back home to my mother. And the first thing I was going to do to start my success is plant against the odds just like her.

The Cannerlands. A place I've heard is the most wasteland of places in the world. If a wasteland could have a wasteland within it, that would describe the Cannerlands perfectly. Hardly any water, way too much sun, no pegasus ponies to interfere with strict weather schedules, and crazy murderous bandits and hunters who want to eat your flesh if the rumors about this place were true. The perfect impossible conditions. I'll just work some of my cutie mark magic and I'll be all set. Fool proof plan.

Then, ponies from all over will hear of the forest that is growing in the Cannerlands. Everyone will tear down the Border to see my wonderful success. Every plant pony with a green hoof will come see my magic and they will all stare in awe at my wonderful talent.

I thought I had a pretty good head start if I may say so myself. I was an earth pony which meant I was a born natural already. I had a plant based cutie mark, I'm sure that helps a huge deal. Plus, I have the most cutting edge shovels and spades and other various gardening equipment to help me out. I had to be confident and I could never lose faith. I could do this. It may be a little difficult, but I was going to do this. Even if it killed me... hopefully I didn't have to get to that point.

I check my bags once more, tapping my hoof against the seat across from me from anxiety. I look once more at the sleeping pony across from my on the opposite side of the train. I couldn't help but envy him when it came right down to it. He probably had his own problems sure, but it was probably relatively simple to what I was trying to accomplish out here. He just looked so peaceful as he slumbered on without a care in the world. I find myself yawning and I realize I haven't slept for thirty six hours since I came to the decision to leave my mom's.

I place my bag against the window sill, trying to adjust it and fluff it up to become a better pillow and I rest against it. I close my eyes and try to focus on sleeping. It took a long time to get myself relaxed, but I think the snoring pony across from me actually helped. His snoring was rhythmic, and soon I found myself drifting off to dreamland... well metaphorically anyways.

I don't dream. I'm not sure if something is wrong with me or if Princess Luna just despises my soul, but I cannot dream for the life of me. I've tried so many things, experimented with so many different methods and nothing has worked. But here's the stranger thing, I am partially conscious when I sleep. Like, conscious to the point where if you're talking behind my back while I sleep, I can hear everything you say. But not conscious enough to wake up and chime. You'd think my cutie mark talent would have something to do with this since I've never known anypony else could manage this, but apparently fate had other more boring decisions for me. Which I was fine with as long as I could get paid and become famous in the end as the most renowned farmer.

Not that I wanted to become a farmer, but you deal with the hand you're dealt.

I'm not sure how long it has been, but I wake up with a migraine while a booming voice summons me from the dead. I jerk up immediately, rubbing the back of my neck with both my hooves to try to comfort myself. What the shit? "Attention. Bandits have taken a hold of the train. Please do not panic and say all prayers as peacefully as you can. Thank you. Attention..." I blink a few times, the message not quite sinking in. The message on the train audio com continued to loop a few more times and then was abruptly cut off. Bandits were on the train? Say our prayers? Weren't they going to do something about it? And as if on cue, the door that led to the next train car that was closest to the other pony who was also gathering his sense, was yanked open off its hinges and thrown right past my head and out the window, showering me in glass and cutting me in several places. I immediately wince in pain and I fall to the ground, what the fuck?! I turn to the entrance way of a new pony who just trotted into the car. He was a red pony, wait, not necesarily red. He 'looked' from what I hope was highlights and not just a ton of fresh blood on him. He wore some sort of mask that cut off in places to make his face look incredibly uneven and unnatural.

"PUT YOUR HOOVES UP AND I WON'T WHIP OUT MY DICK JR." On his back was an ax, except magnified by a ton and spikes sticking out of the blade itself. The slightly overweight pony finally came to his full sense and realized what was happening. He took one look at the pony and began to yell something fierce, causing my ears to instantly flop down while I close my eyes tightly in pain from the yelling and the migraine. Someponies were just born with annoying voice boxes I guess. But I didn't have to wait long for the yelling to stop, a kind of gushing sound replaced it almost immediately. I opened an eye to see what it was and to my horror, I saw the overweight pony now gutted with a giant axe looking thing.

If it was ever asked what my response was to this, I certainly did not instantly wet myself nor did I begin to cry profusely. What I most certainly did however was get up from my seat and ran to the back door of train car as fast as my little hooves could take me. "I AM A SPAGHETTI MONSTER AND I WILL DEVOUR YOUR EYE HOLES!!!" The hockey mask wearing pony yelled out at me. I glance over my shoulder right as I yank open the door to the next car. Thank the goddess I did so as I duck immediately and let a flying ax whizz above me into the next car. I don't even bother looking to the probably even more enraged manic pony who missed at getting a yummy desert. I dive into the next car and slam the door behind me.

I pant hard in and out, feeling sweat roll down my back in buckets. I felt like I couldn't get in enough air, on the edge of suffocation as I began to take gulps of air into my body hoping to calm myself down, and then I look forward and see that the ax found its way into a very unfortunate pony who I couldn't tell what color he was due to the all the blood that painted him. It was right then and there that I threw up whatever I had for breakfast this morning. I reached into my saddle pack... or I would have, but I realized that I left it on the seat in the other room with the crazy maniac pony.

I take a look at the door behind me and stick my tongue out in frustration. Today was just not my day. It then began to vibrate rather suddenly and I scamper from it like a cornered mouse. The door doesn't put up much of a fight as it easily crumbles against the maniac ponies barrage. "I BET YOU TASTE OF VOMIT AND PIG INTESTINES!" The maniac pony screams some sort of nonsense.

Okay, that's just plain rude. I take one good look at the ax planted in the face of the unlucky sap, whoever he was. I quickly dive for the axe and try to pull it free. After what seemed like an eternity as I could just feel the maniac pony was about to lunge for my throat, I finally pull it free with a horrifying squelch. I could just feel every single individual fur on my skin stand straight up. I used a little too much strength to pull free the murder weapon as I feel my entire body began to shift backwards. I swing the ax to face the maniac pony when my slippery, bloody hooves lets the ax go straight into the maniac pony's face. I could only watch in horror and slight relief as the ax does exactly what it did to its first victim.

I've never been more mollified and relieved all at once. It was an epic turmoil of emotions. I just killed something. I've never killed anything. Ever. I've let things die, sure, like plants and there was a pet goldfish I forgot to feed once. But I never ever tried to kill anything, let alone hurt it... I mean, there was one time, but that was by total accident. Something about it just seemed animalistic, unnatural even. I feel my mind rationalize it though, it was either him or me, and I didn't feel like dying today. And just as quick as guilt came, it subsided. I would only kill in self defense was my promise to myself. I take another look at the maniac pony to convince myself that I would probably have to do this again and I had to get used to the sight of a pony's innards becoming outwards. The musky stench of iron, the squishy gushy sounds that it made as the... the... fell out... I threw up again all over the corpse.

I quickly turn away from the door. I couldn't take it anymore. I completely forgot about the bag and decided to move forward. I'd be able to get gardening equipment in the Cannerlands I'm sure. I mean what could they eat? Other ponies? My mind immediately reminded me of a prime example behind me and I decide to quickly add that there had to be some sane ponies in Cannerland that ate normal food, right?

I then remembered there was another dead pony in here. The pony in front of me with the catcher's mitt for a head. Ugh, I need to stop describing these scenarios, I'm making myself sick every time I even think about it. I look up at the pale yellow ceiling of the train car as I step over the pony. I trip on something on his back and I decide I can at least look at the not gross part of his corpse.

He had a backpack that tied around his neck. On the sides of the backpack were little pockets filled with sharp pointy golden sticks. They looked like they hurt. My inexperience in being able to defend myself by proactively hurting others was showing super hard. I slowly turn the corpse over, trying to limit all contact with the corpse as much as possible. The process takes a few minutes as I finally get the backpack off him. It wasn't stealing. The pony was already dead and I didn't kill him, so I'm not looting either I am scavenging. Big difference... I hope.

I'm going to rot in Tartarus aren't I?

I check what's inside the back itself and I find myself a few things of interests. Some sort of head piece, a book, a rolled up piece of parchment, and a entire box filled with those sharp pointy My blood is still pumping and my mind tells me this is not the place to see what loot is inside the pack. I take out the head piece and I close my bag. I tie the bag around my neck and make sure its secure on my back so it doesn't bounce around too much.

I take a quick look at the head piece. It was a piece of gray plastic. On one of the ends was a clear little lens. It looked like it was supposed to attach around one of my ears. I suppose the instructions was in the backpack. I would take a look later, but I mind as well put this doo-hickey on. It would make my backpack a little lighter and besides, it always love accessorizing. I lift it above my head and I snag the little piece onto my ear. As soon as it snags, it clasps onto my skin and pricks the tip of my ear.

I wince in pain and grunt a little, not expecting this turn of events. Suddenly, a bunch of glowing letters appear in front of me. The glowing letters were barely legible and were incredibly fuzzy. I didn't get much time to look at it. 'HAYS' Was the only word I was able to make out that were right next to each other as the glowing letters disappeared. Then, a bunch of bars and flashing lights appeared before me. I didn't have any time to react as things began to pop up in my line of vision. In the bottom left corner of my eye was a red bar with a bold white number on top of it. The number was relatively like '50' or something. I saw a glowing circle in my upper right corner of my vision. It had a glowing yellow arrow which I assumed was me, because as I swayed, so did the arrow.

I reached out my hooves to try and touch either of the two new shiny bars in my vision, but my hooves always reached past them. It was until I realized that these things were as if they were painted on my eyes. I found them pretty neat in all honesty. I could only assume this was some sort of tool that Trove Hunters used provided by that little hunk of plastic now occupying my left ear. I was about to move onto the next car when I a huge square showed up in the corner of my eye. It told me a bunch of information that I didn't quite understand. Fire rate? Accuracy? Damage? What rate of fire was it describing? Accuracy of what? And what was damaged?

It was only after a mere moment that I noticed something glowing white on the corpse's hoof. It was a small bracelet with a small little tube attached to it. I pick it up, examining it. It was supposedly called a 'Pin-Point Poker'. I put it on my wrist and then a new glowing blue bar occupied the bottom right corner of my vision. It showed a pointy shape, much like the ones in my backpack's pocket, and two numbers with a slash in between the two. The one on the left of the slash said '6', the one on the right of the slash said '494'. From what I could gather, this was the amount of shots I had. I take one last look at my wrist and I see that a bright red 'AJ' is written on top of the little tube. "Well AJ, let's get moving, I don't want to be here when more bandits arrive, do you?" I ask the little tube. It said nothing in response.
Dear fucking Celestia, I'm lonely. I could only mutter to myself, brief flashbacks of high school coming to haunt me once more.

While I trotted to the next car, I began to fidget with my bracelet. I didn't really know how to use the little tube. The top of it had a little cross-hair tied to the top of one end with a hole. One I assumed whatever this weapon was, it shot something from the hole like a blow pipe I read about in Daring Doo. On the other side of the tube was a circular chamber. I shook it a few times and I could definitely feel something rattle ever so slightly. It was locked in tight, but there was definitely something loose in there. One last detail I noticed about the small tube was a little trigger-esque button hanging off the bottom of the tube, brushing the fur of my fore hoof and the strap it was attached to. Something in my inner most brilliance told me to point and press. I'd have to find a bandit to test that out on.

I get to the next car and its surprisingly empty. I decide to just keep moving, not wanting to dawdle while I have all this adrenaline pumping. While I trot from car to car though, I take notice that the train hasn't stopped moving yet. I wonder if bandits had control of the train or if the train conductor was somehow still safe? It was then that a brief little message popped up on my screen in a little square. "Confirm the status of the train." with a little box next to it underneath my circle map. So you can keep track of my stuff huh? Alright, pretty neat I'd have to say.

I think I'm prepared to kill another pony. I think to myself as I brace myself for the future fights.

Wow, what a turnaround huh? Give a pony a weapon and some fancy eyeball thingy and she becomes a mean killing machine! Maybe we're all killers on the inside? Waiting to bust out of our chests like some sort of spoiled back of the fridge food? I get deep sometimes.

I finally get to a car where there seems to be some commotion. I hear voices in the next car as well as loud explosions. Did somepony bring bombs on the train?! I take a deep breath and I peak my head into the door. I am greeted with the backs of several blood stained backs that seem to be shooting a lot of explosions toward the end of the train. They seem to have barricaded themselves from whoever they were fighting with. "Scabjerker?! Is that you?! Give us some assistance! We goin' blow these arseholes sky high!" Scabjerker? That was definitely not me. I take a closer look at them and I immediately feel my gut do a flip. These were the bandits. They were all smeared in blood, their manes were tufts of fur, and they all smelled like they haven't ever touched water except maybe to drown someone in it. "DUCK SCABBERS!" I see all the bandits duck behind the barricade as I can barely see a black and white pony on the otherside of the room aim a really large tube in my general direction.

I immediately freak out and back off into the car behind me and slam the door. A few seconds later, a giant explosion shakes the entire train and the door I'm leaning on falls backwards, a door frame no longer supporting it. I gulp and take a deep breath, looking to what seemed to have happened. I saw the car all those ponies were derail in front of me and begin to tumble and tumble for a few moments when it finally gave out and broke in half, spilling out a bunch of bloody corpses. I'm sure I would have thrown up, but I think my vomit reserves were running on low. Shame.

I kinda just lay there for a while, the harsh dust barreling in from the outside. I wanted so badly to just lie down and die. This was a terrible fucking idea. I should have just stay in my mother's shadow. I should have just stayed at home. I'm in pain, I've seen more bloodshed than what I'm sure most Equestrian doctors have seen, I wanted out. I shut my eyes tightly and after a minute, I was hoping to find myself in my bed at home and this was all a bad dream.

No such luck. I'm on a train, barreling for the Border, probably going to die today. The least I could do was something rather than nothing. I still had my weapon. I still had this vision thingy from that pony. He probably had an idea of what to do at this point, and I got him killed... NO! Focus! I can do this. Confidence. Confidence. Not the ideal start to my farming journey, but I gotta deal with the hand I'm dealt. And I have tools to deal with it. I can do this.

I repeat this mantra for a good minute and then I went out on a limb and I aimed my little bracelet towards the wreckage that I could barely see the outline of. I flexed my fore-hoof downwards and felt a brief jolt followed by brief sound of something exploding. I blinked and I'd like to think I just found out how to use my weapon. As further proof, my little bar to the right with numbers changed as I took my shot. It was now '5/594' instead of '6'. I would have to figure out how to change that number back to a 6 but at least I got some sort of basic defense down.

As I decided to back track to the train, the little message that told me to "Confirm the status of the train." had the box next to it fill with a green check. A new box appeared below, "Get to the Train Engine." That seemed like the appropriate next action. That should be where I could stop the train, or at least stop fueling it so we don' t end up like the train cars behind us. A plan was now in mind, I took a deep breath and trotted forward.

It was back in the room where the two freshly opened ponies were (ugh) that I found some new faces. I immediately recognized hockey masks covering their faces. They all turn to me and take out weapons of their own, pointing them at me. They begin to fire and I just duck behind the corner of the previous car. I sit down on my haunches and gasp for air, seeing bright beams of light whizz past my face. After a moment of mini explosions and lights stop, I peek out around the corner to see if they're still there. I immediately feel a searing pain in my forehoof.

I duck back behind the corner of my car as the bandit ponies were still there, continuing their assault. I look down at my forehoof and I assess the damage. I felt my entire body go numb as I see a huge gash of red liquid fall out of my leg. That definitely wasn't there before. I gasp in pain and I see the red bar in my bottom left tick down to '20'. I reason that must be my well being, my health you could say. These weapons hurt like hell.

"Don't get hit by these things. Gotcha," I wheeze in and out. I wasn't going to go anywhere unless I took care of these three bandits. I bite down hard my lower lip where I taste a little blood from the pressure. Here goes fucking nothing.

I turn the corner and I raise my undamaged forehoof with the bracelet weapon, taking aim and firing at a single bandit pony in the open. By some sort of miracle, the first shot hits and I see in red letters, "CRITICAL" pop up above the little pony's head. He lets out a grunt of pain and I see his own red bar above him. He was apparently labeled as a 'Bandit' by my vision thingy. He had but a sliver of red bar left and I feel my entire body spasm in glee as I just took my first shot. It was an... unorthodox response I gotta admit. But it felt good, so I decided to take another shot and he went down. As he went, I see him drop a few things and I almost run over to pick it up when I remember there was a few other ponies. I quickly look from side to side of the train car but I don't see a single eyelash of either of them.

I limp out from my hiding place and I stagger over to the now three dead corpses in front of me. The pony I shot seemed to have dropped some more golden pointy sticks of pain I decided to call them. I could already tell that they probably went inside my weapon, but I couldn't figure out how. Putting them through the hole seemed incorrect, so I decided to just leave it be. My counter told me I had three shots left in my weapon, so I'm sure I could handle those two ponies ahead with my three shots.

As I continued my journey to the front of the train, I made sure my green saddle bags were left untouched. There were definitely touched as everything was spilled across the floor and unorganized like my younger years as a filly. I was going to spend a moment to clean it up, but I turned my attentions to the front of the train and realized I had slightly more important things to take care of. I left the green saddlebags for later after we could get the train to stop. After trotting a little longer, I realize I don't have much to go. I pass by a few more dead ponies, bandits and passenger alike. It seemed that the bandits faced a bunch of resistance and I missed the mass of it. Lucky me. I see a door ahead and I noticed that there is a pole on each side of the door, one pole had a red velvet rope hanging off of it. I think I made it to the front of the train.

"PEEL HIS SKIN OFF!!!"

"EAT HIS INTESTINES!"

"I'M GOING TO KILL YOU BOTH YOU ASSHOLES!!!" I hear two gurgle like voices that sounded of bandits, and one normal sane voice. My eyes widen and I quickly bust the door open. As I do so, the bandits immediately take notice as well as the voice that I assumed belongs to the sane pony. The two bandits were the ones I saw not a few moments ago. One was wrestling with a shade of brown pony that had short orange mane and medium sized tail. The other bandit pony was right in front of me, giant axe in his mouth that was aimed in my direction.

I'm pretty sure I make a sound that was similar to a mouse as I duck. The axe barely missing the top of mane as it crashed in the wall next to me. I waste not another second as I aim the tube right into his face. 'CRITICAL. CRITICAL." And down he went. The bandit and the light brown pony was still wrestling. I took aim with my weapon, but then my mind went straight to, 'What if you don't hit the bandit?'

I won't. I'm confident in my ability.

'Confident enough to gamble with something you just picked up today?' Damnit. Now I'm nowhere near confident. I only stood there helplessly as I watched the two ponies wrestle, and the bandit was clearly winning, having more experience in fighting it seemed. What do I do?!

I look at the pack on my back and I pull a sharp pointy stick of pain from my pack and rush forward. I bite my lower lip and I don't try to think too hard about what I'm going to do. I tackle into the two ponies and I get on top of one of them. I quickly check if I'm ontop of my target. I see the hockey mask and I drive my bullet deep into one of his eyes.

Squish.

That was the noise it made. That is what it felt like.

'CRITICAL'

YES. I GET IT.

"Damn. That was bad ass." The light brown pony commented, his face struck with awe. I wasn't quite sure how to take that.

"Um. No, my name is Kale." I offer instead. The light brown let out a loud guffaw. I smile and I join him for a moment. We compose ourselves soon after and he then offers his hoof.

"Nice to meet ya Kale. Now c'mon! The Conductor will know how to sort this mess out! We gotta go find him," He turns to the door and I stand to stop him and tell him the news when I stumble over my wounded leg. I take another look at it and the blood flow seemed to have lessened, but it still looked incredibly terrible. "Shit. That looks bad,"

"Gee. Thanks." I grimace.

"Not to worry. I got a spare Insta-Health. One second," He pulls out a red vial with a pointy needle. I immediately blanch. I hated needles pointed in my direction. I blame my several past near death experiences within the last hour, but he was uninjured and way stronger than me, so I just sat there and accepted my fate.

Surprisingly, that didn't hurt at all. I began to feel strength crawling its way back into my body. I look down at my wound and wiped away some of the blood. The wound was no longer open and it was just a fading scar into the rest of my fur. The red bar in the bottom right corner of my vision was slowly ticking back up to full, "Thank Celestia. Thank you so much..." I leave a gap in my sentence for his name, but he shakes his head.

"No time. We gotta go now. The Conductor will be able to fix all of this..."

As he was about to leave the engine room, I reach out and grab a hold of his flank. He turns to me and blushes, "Um."

My eyes widen and I quickly let go. That got awkward, but I finally got his attention. "Don't." Was all I could say to him before he looked at me for further explanation. I always hated being the bearer of bad news. I sigh and I explain to him what happened to the other train cars. Even if the conductor did survive, he wouldn't be able to help us. I was expecting him to let go a sigh of relief, because by ancient gods above, they knew how much I despised my boss. But instead, I see his eyes immediately well up as fear creeped upon his face.

"Dad? Are... you... tell..." His face was struck with disbelief. He sat down and hid his face in his hooves. Oh shit.

"Wheel?! Are you there?! Damnit! ANSWER!" A loud voice rang into the engine room as well as my ear as if he was right next to me. The light brown pony who was on the verge of a mental break down immediately stood up and trotted past me to the engine controls, "Damnit Wheel! If you don't answer, my boys will have no choice but to blast that train off the track! Tell me you're still alive damnit!" The light brown pony swore under his breath and looked at me.

"Hey! Is your HAYS device still working?"

"My what device?"

"That thing attached to your ear!" I look at him oddly and he trots up to me and jams his hoof against the side of my head, slightly disorientating me. He pressed something on the piece of plastic and I hear a little click of a button.

"Sheriff Stallion! My dad's dead! How do we stop this thing?"

"Celestia's sake. Do you know what the brake lever looks like?" The brown pony pulls some long metal stick off the ground and holds it out in front of us.

"Yeah. A bandit broke it off." He says matter of fact. I suddenly feel the vomit making a surprise appearance in the back of my throat.

"Shit!" The train speaker as well as something right next to my ear sounds as if a pony was shouting something and breaking something all at once. After a moment, the Sheriff cleared his throat. "Son, you're going to want to grab a hold of something that firmly bolted down. We can set a manual brake from here, but ya'll are going downright as fast as the buccaneer blazes. You are going to crash. Remember what you were taught son and we'll see ya'll when ya get here," The Sheriff said as if he was discussing the weather.

We're going to crash? "We're going to crash?!!?" I yell. He simply nods at me and sighs.

"Yep. You heard him. Grab something firmly bolted to the ground and relax when you feel your body lurch." He then proceeded to follow his own instruction. I look at him with disbelief and I look out the window. I could see a brief outline of a town in the distance as well as a huge mountain that spanned for what seemed like miles.

Looks like I made it to the Border. And I could die right here, right now. How embarrassing would that be?

I look for something to hold on to when I see that what the light brown pony chose had enough room for one more. I snuggle my way next to him as he gives me a look. I shrug. "You're the expert. I've never been on a train," He nods and closes his eyes tightly, bracing himself for impact. I poke him and he raises an eyebrow and looks at me. "You never told me your name. You know it's rude to make a lady wait,"

He chuckles and I see a small smile creep across his face, "Grind. Grind Fullset, son of Wheel Fullset. At your service," I smile back at him and nod. He then goes back to his bracing himself position and I follow his lead and do the same. After a few moments, I hear a loud screeching sound followed by an even louder thunking sound. "Remember! Relax when you feel your stomach lurch!!!" He screams, but I can barely register. I can do nothing but tense up and wait the inevitable to happen.

I'm about to die. I'm about to die. I'm about to die. I'm about to die. I'm about to die. I'm about to die. I'm about to die. I'm about to die. I'm about to die. I'm about to...

My entire world became chaos within a second. I kept my eyes shut as I felt my entire body get tossed and flipped around. I could no longer feel Grind next to me as the sound of angels screaming and the earth breaking itself in half yelled into my ears, as if its sole purpose was to make me deaf. Somewhere in the middle of all this, my entire body was being showered in debris, punching me and knocking me from my position. I kept my eyes closed, wishing it all to just end.

And then my world became silent.

*~LEVEL UP~*

Level 2

You feel slightly stronger and your face can endure more bullets. Yay.