Lesson One: Reading your Partner
“Oh...I didn't expect to find you here.”
Twilight found herself once more standing at the doorway of her mentor's private study, eying the Changeling Queen that was making herself comfortable on Princess Celestia's favorite cushion. As a change of pace, this time Chrysalis seemed to be focusing intently upon a chessboard at her side, rather than waking from an ill-timed nap.
“And just where else would I be?” Chrysalis replied, not glancing towards the purple princess.
“Uhm, just about anywhere in the castle, really.” Twilight answered, after a moment of thought. While technically a prisoner to Princess Celestia, the Changeling Queen basically had full-run of the castle, and could even leave Canterlot Castle provided she was escorted. No one thought this to be an especially large concession, as Twilight was fairly sure that if Chrysalis wanted to leave it would be rather difficult to stop her. Given the changeling's skills, experience and personal power, truly imprisoning her would have likely called for fairly extreme measures.
“Where else would I choose to be?” The changeling pointedly asked, still not looking towards Twilight, her gaze fixed upon the gameboard and it's pieces.
Now that she thought about it, Chrysalis did seem to prefer to keep to Princess Celestia's private study more often than not.
“Sorry. I didn't mean to interrupt you or anything.” Twilight apologized after a moment.
While she had trouble considering the Changeling Queen as anything like a friend, their relationship had become far less adversarial than it once was. Ever since Twilight had been properly introduced to Chrysalis, their interactions had been confusing, at best. And seeing as Twilight was a major part of the agreement that lead to Chrysalis stepping down as the queen of her changelings and being placed under a sort of house arrest, she had resigned herself to having to regularly expose herself to the unpredictable Changeling Queen.
Not that she minded terribly, but Twilight had some non-changeling issues weighing on her mind right now.
“...Well?”
Twilight looked up, broken from her thoughts at Chrysalis' prompting, the Changeling Queen having torn her gaze away from her gameboard “Well, what?”
“Was there something you needed?” Chrysalis asked, with an upraised eyebrow.
“Oh, I-...uhm, no?” Twilight hesitantly replied.
“...I don't know why you're lying, but you need to practice.” Chrysalis said.
“What? Why would you think I'm lying?”
“For one thing, your voice gives you away when you try to lie.”
“That could be-”
“And, instead of denying that you are lying, you're trying to use vague responses to try to mislead me.”
“Alright, I get-”
“You also expressed surprise at finding me here, and there's only one other individual that you would reasonably expect to find in her own study. Meaning, that you're clearly-”
“Fine! I was trying to find Princess Celestia!” Twilight eventually blurted out.
“...Now was that so hard?” The Changeling Queen asked with a too-smug look on her face.
Twilight couldn't help but send a look of annoyance at that jab.
“Your body language also gave you away. You try to shy away and cover yourself when you know that you're lying.” Chrysalis added a moment later, utterly unbothered by the young princess' ire.
“...Anything else you would like to add?” Twilight asked, with a frown.
“Only, that I expected better from you. I never thought I would see the day when the word 'princess' became synonymous with 'liar'.” Chrysalis replied in a faux-sugary tone.
Twilight gave out a sigh “You know from a certain point-of-view, I wasn't-”
“I really don't care if you lie to me. I would however appreciate it if you put a bit of effort into it.” Chrysalis interjected.
Twilight again frowned, a bit perturbed by the Changeling Queen's odd priorities.
“In any event, Celestia probably won't be along for another few hours. She's holding her little court right now.” Chrysalis eventually supplied in an off-hoof manner, as she turned her attention back to her chess board.
“That long? Princess Celestia's sessions don't normally go on like that.” Twilight quickly latched on to the change of topic.
“I tried to assist her in moving things along, but evidently scaring away her petitioners is going too far.” Chrysalis explained.
“You were scaring off her supplicants?” Twilight asked with some surprise.
“I wasn't exactly cackling madly, while shooting off bolts of magic, but you could say that. And frankly, if their issues are of so little importance they can't brave my annoyance, then clearly they don't need to be bothering Celestia.” Chrysalis elaborated.
“And let me guess...she kicked you out, and now has to round up all the ponies you drove off.”
“An astounding lack of gratitude, isn't it?”
“Staggering.” Twilight dryly replied, earning a chuckle from the Changeling Queen. Glancing to her side now, the young princess considered this information for a moment “I suppose, if Princess Celestia is going to be tied up for that long...”
“Giving up that easily?” Chrysalis chimed.
“You just told me that she's going to be busy for the next few hours.” Twilight reminded.
“And you think she wouldn't make time for you?”
“Well-...I'm sure she would, but...it's really not that important, anyway.”
“...So, now you've revealed yourself as a liar, once more.”
Twilight blinked at this accusation “What?”
“Another tip for the future, you need to keep your story straight.” Chrysalis supplied.
“I- why do you think I'm lying, now?” Twilight demanded, confused now.
“You did say that you were trying to find Celestia, just a few moments ago, did you not?” The Changeling Queen reminded, even as she brought a hole-filled hoof to her chin, as she continued to consider her game.
“Yes. But, I don't see-” Twilight began.
“You make a special trip all the way to Canterlot, specifically to find and speak with Celestia, and at the smallest impediment you're ready to give up. You might think that you want to speak with her about something, but you're obviously looking for an excuse not to.” Chrysalis elaborated.
“That-...that's nothing but conjecture, Chrysalis. You can't-” Twilight began.
“I'll go get Celestia right now then.” The changeling cut-in, even as she stood up.
“What?”
“I'm sure I can tear her away from her adoring subjects for a few minutes. Then you can tell her whatever it is you need to-” Chrysalis began, as she began walking towards the door to the study.
“Wait!” Twilight blurted out, earning a knowing look from the Changeling Queen.
“That is...it would be rude...” Twilight pitifully supplied.
Chrysalis raised an eyebrow at this response.
“Alright...maybe, this isn't something I'm really ready to talk with her about...” Twilight slowly admitted.
“Romance issues?”
Twilight couldn't help but stare up in shock at the changeling's quick answer “How did you-”
Chrysalis rolled her eyes at this “Some credit, please. You're not that difficult to read.”
Twilight furrowed her brow at this, not sure if she should take it as an insult or not.
“Oh, don't be like that. All I meant, is that you're both rational and reasonable.” Chrysalis explained.
“Are you trying to suggest that I should try to be less rational and reasonable now?” The princess asked, with some skepticism.
“Not at all. It makes you rather tolerable, actually...It also makes it much easier to toy with you.” Chrysalis primly replied.
Twilight turned to the side, before loosing a sigh. She really couldn't be surprised by that answer.
“Well, that's just great...” The young alicorn muttered aloud.
“Isn't it though? I could even tell you exactly how I was able to deduce your little problem, if you'd-” Chrysalis began to offer.
“I don't think that will be necessary. Thanks.” Twilight irritably cut-in.
“Oh...well, suit yourself.” The changeling hastily replied, after a moment.
The young princess had to look up at that response, somewhat thrown by Chrysalis' tone.
She almost sounded...disappointed.
Twilight found herself briefly reminded of all the times that she would try to share her own knowledge with those she knew, only for them to, at best, barely show any interest. She knew that she could run at the mouth sometimes, but still, it was always a bit dissatisfying to be dismissed by those around you.
“Uhm...I mean, I suppose if you really thought it might help...” Twilight tried to offer. It was odd, to say the least, that she could find herself showing any concern for Chrysalis' feelings, especially over something so small. But those occasional small displays of...normality, made it too easy to see the Changeling Queen as not that different from a typical pony.
Things were so much easier, when she simply saw Chrysalis as another villainous monster.
What Twilight couldn't figure out, was why the changeling was bothered at all. Chrysalis didn't seem like the sort to put any stock in the opinions of others, or to be affected by such a small thing. If anything, she seemed very practiced in projecting nothing less than absolute confidence and strength. Some cynical part of Twilight's mind wondered if this recent display was a put upon act, to gain sympathy or some such thing.
“No, it's not really all that relevant to your issue anyway.” Chrysalis replied with a dismissive wave of one of her hooves.
“I'm honestly kind of curious. So, please-” Twilight pressed.
“What exactly is the issue between you and your little prince?” The changeling interrupted a bit sharply. That was usually a sign to drop whatever topic you were trying to pursue with her.
Twilight was briefly tempted to stick to it, but knew well enough that she wouldn't get anywhere with the stubborn queen. That being said, she also wasn't that keen on sharing her current personal problem with Chrysalis' either.
The changeling let loose an abrupt sigh, seeing Twilight's reticence “Let me guess, you have no idea how to actually go about dating somepony, do you?”
Twilight glanced to the side, not denying what Chrysalis was suggesting.
“I can only assume you've never had any romantic partners before now, correct?”
“...Not really.” Twilight admitted.
“Not even your brash pegasus friend?” Chrysalis asked in a teasing tone.
“I-...what? Why would you think that?” Twilight asked, not understanding where the Changeling Queen could have gotten the idea that she and Rainbow Dash could of...
“I knew it. Celestia liked to entertain that idea. But, I always told her it was just another ridiculous cliché that she was entertaining; the bookish introvert falling for the boldly confident athlete.” Chrysalis said, mostly to herself.
“Wait...have you two have been speculating about my love life?” Twilight demanded, bewildered by the implication.
“Hm? Oh, yes. Celestia was always eager to tell me about you, during our little get-togethers.” Chrysalis explained, referring to the friendly meetings the two rulers used to have when they weren't forced to be at odds with one another “She ended up spending a great deal of time wondering when you were going to start dating. Really, she's a bit of a busybody, when it comes to romance.”
Twilight did not know how to react to that. On the one hoof, it was kind of nice to know that Princess Celestia thought so highly of her that she would tell others about her. On the other hoof, she didn't know how to take it, that the Princess of the Sun seemed to be rather concerned with her love-life. Or lack thereof.
“Ok...but that still doesn't explain why she thought I would end up dating Rainbow Dash.” Twilight reminded.
“As I said, she's has a bit of a weakness for these sorts of cliches. After the years she spent trying to set you up with somepony amounted to nothing, I think Celestia's latched onto what she thought would be a...cute match. With no real concern for the reality.” Chrysalis elaborated.
“...What are you talking about? I don't remember Princess Celestia ever trying to set me up with anypony.” Twilight pointed out.
“You don't recall all the times she went out of her way to get you to meet other ponies around your age?” Chrysalis asked.
“Well, yes. But-”
“Specifically inviting you to small social functions, where she would then introduce you to physically attractive stallions and mares. Then spending inordinate amounts of time getting them to tell you about themselves, even as she made a point to extoll their virtues.” Chrysalis continued.
“That doesn't mean-”
“Did she make you dress-up for these small get-togethers? Did she perhaps comment on how you and some of these ponies looked 'nice' together?” The Changeling Queen asked with a raised eyebrow.
The young princess' eyes steadily widened, as she was struck by a shocking revelation “Starswirl's beard...She's been trying to- Princess Celestia wants me to-...That's been going on for years!”
“Indeed.”
“She's been trying to set me up with somepony all this time?! How could I have not noticed this?!” Twilight demanded.
“A question for the ages, I'm sure.”
“I mean, has she been trying to- to-...”
“...Get you laid?” Chrysalis supplied for the distraught alicorn.
Twilight immediately paled, before suddenly turning bright red.
“I think we both know the answer to that, Twilight Sparkle.” Chrysalis gleefully added.
The young princess immediately sank to the floor, before using her hooves to cover her face, desperate to escape that thought.
“In any event, Celestia's just pleased as a peach, that you've finally decided to pursue somepony. Even more so, given that it's her own beloved nephew.” Chrysalis added, happy to throw fuel onto the fire.
Twilight immediately went rigid, after having that little bit pointed out to her.
“But, why?!” Twilight demanded, still trying to wrap her mind around this.
“It's just her way of dealing with her circumstances, I suppose.” Chrysalis flippantly replied.
“Circumstances?” Twilight asked, not understanding what the changeling meant.
“Yes, making sure that those Celestia cares about find love and happiness and eventually bless the world with little children to carry on their memory...or something like that.” Chrysalis elaborated, in a casual tone.
Twilight couldn't help but stare, suspecting that the conversation had careened off into an entirely different direction. It only took a moment for Chrysalis to notice this reaction, and only a little longer to understand what it signified.
Twilight was briefly surprised by the irritated look that crossed the Changeling Queen's expression, as Chrysalis let out a heated sigh “She still hasn't had the Talk with you, has she?”
“The Talk? Wait, you mean about...intercourse?” The young alicorn hesitantly asked, even more confused now.
The Changeling Queen rose a hole-filled hoof to her brow, as she tried to rub away some of her growing frustration.
“No. I'm referring to the important discussion that she needs to have with you, that she keeps putting off, due to her terrible coddling habit.” Chrysalis explained, with no small amount of agitation.
This did quite a bit to clarify the situation for Twilight, leaving her to recall certain emotionally draining conversations that she had fallen into with the Changeling Queen previously.
Chrysalis loosed another sigh, before looking down towards the young princess “Enough of this. What exactly is the problem you're having with Blueblood?”
“Wait a minute. Why-” Twilight began.
Chrysalis held up her hoof to forestall Twilight's objection “If Celestia had spoken to you before now, you would know that waiting is not always going to be an option. Now, are you going to let me help you or not?”
A few minutes later...
“So, why exactly is it that you want to help me?”
It had taken a bit for Twilight to calm down, after recent revelations, though she was happy to say that her rational side had reasserted itself. Which was fortunate, as Chrysalis held little patience for her little freak-out, and had at one point threatened to berate the young princess into calmness, if she didn't get it together. That had actually helped a bit, as the sheer departure from logic that threat entailed had gripped the reasonable part of her mind, and dragged it to the forefront. Granted, this still lead to a brief argument over the fact, that you couldn't reasonably expect to harass someone into calming down, but still...
“Because, you are clearly in desperate need of advice...also, I was getting bored waiting on Celestia.” Came the changeling's, somewhat condescending, reply.
“And you are going to be the one providing me this advice?” Twilight asked, skeptically.
“You could always go speak to Cadenza, about how you're having doubts concerning dating her beloved big brother.” Came Chrysalis' easy counter.
“I- that doesn't necessarily make you an expert in the field.” Twilight argued.
“Regardless, the important thing is, that I know more about the subject than you do.” Chrysalis said with a wave of her hoof.
“...And just how many centuries did it take for you to admit that you were attracted to Princess Celestia?” Twilight dryly inquired.
“And just how many centuries do you have to waste talking about this?” Chrysalis sharply retorted.
Twilight had to duck her head, when the Changeling Queen brought that subject back up. The subject of her nigh immortality, and the distinct lack of immortality that most ponies possessed.
The changeling let out a harsh sigh, as she rubbed her brow “Perhaps that was uncalled for...let's move on.”
The young princess had to spare a glance, at that response. She knew from experience, that it was like pulling teeth getting Chrysalis to apologize for anything. While not exactly an apology, it was about as close to one as she had ever gotten from the Changeling Queen. And it was unprompted at that.
“Now. I assume you've done some manner of...research into this subject, yes? You seem like the type.” Chrysalis soon prompted, as she paced in front of the young princess.
“Uhm, yes, actually. I managed to find some guidebooks and self-help books on the subject. Nothing peer-reviewed, unfortunately. I also managed to get some recommendations for notable romantic fictions, from Rarity. I haven't managed to go through those yet.” Twilight quickly summed up.
“It's just as well. None of that is going to be of any great help to you.” Chrysalis explained.
“How do you mean?” Twilight asked with a tilt of her head.
“Books like that are meant to assist typical ponies, that are dealing with typical problems...In what ways are you typical?” The changeling asked.
“I suppose, you have a point there. But what about the romances? I might be able to-” Twilight began.
“I can already tell you, that if you try to pull any tricks from those books he's going to realize it.” Chrysalis quickly interjected.
“Oh, right...” She'd almost forgotten about Prince Blueblood's secret pastime. He was actually the famed, or infamous depending on who you asked, romance novelist Princess Purple Prose. That little facet about the stallion had come out recently, when his pen name had been leaked to the pubic. This in turn, had lead to the prince being linked to a fairly large, and inexplicably popular, collection of trashy romance novels. To Blueblood's displeasure, as he had never intended his stories to be taken so seriously.
“I suppose, he wouldn't really care for that kind of romance then.” Twilight noted to herself.
“I wouldn't say that.” Chrysalis replied.
“Hm?”
“He wouldn't be writing those stories if he was anything other than a romantic at heart.” The changeling explained.
“I don't understand what you mean. Blueblood's always going on about how disappointed he is, that so many ponies take those stories seriously. They're supposed to be satire, right?” Twilight pointed out.
“They are. That does not mean he's not a romantic.”
Twilight made a gesture with her hoof, to prompt Chrysalis to continue.
Rolling her eyes, at having to explain what she thought should have been obvious, Chrysalis took several steps towards Twilight “What his little novels are meant to mock, is the overly-dramatic, cliché-riddled romances that ponies are increasingly mistaking for reality.”
The young princess had to consider that for a few moments “You're saying that he wants romance, but he wants it to be natural. To come from the heart.”
“Precisely. Which is exactly your problem, as you have no idea how to provide that for him.” Chrysalis summed up, eliciting a look of chagrine from Twilight.
“Right...” She might have phrased it differently, but Twilight really had no proper idea, as to how she was supposed to be...romantic. She had never flirted with anypony, or gone on dates, or kissed anypony. There was a great big gap in her knowledge, that she had never gotten around to filling, till now.
Sure, she had gone on several dates with the handsome prince, after having decided to pursue him. But, at no point did they feel, at all, romantic. She'd chatted with him about current events, had some meals with him, before eventually returning to the palace, and then Ponyville.
They seemed more like friendly outings, than dates, when you laid them out like that.
“So...what exactly would you suggest for addressing that?” Twilight asked, even as she looked back up towards the Changeling Queen.
“Simple...you practice.”
“What? How am I supposed to practice that?” Twilight contended. After all, the whole point of practice, was to improve your skills in a low-risk environment. Where if you screwed up, the consequences would be minimal. If she ended up dropping the ball with Blueblood it could end things before they even began.
Chrysalis didn't respond, and instead stared at the young princess.
“I mean, I can't exactly just...flirt with him, until I get it right...Can I?” Twilight eventually asked.
“Actually, you can.” The changeling answered, in a matter-of-fact manner.
“How do you-” Twilight began, before being cut-off by a bright flash of green fire.
When the magical fires dissipated, there stood Prince Blueblood where Chrysalis had been standing, in all of his handsome glory. His carefully cultivated posh accent soon cut through the air “How do you think?”
Twilight couldn't help but stare for several seconds, as she tried to process what the changeling was suggesting. It didn't take long.
“No, no, no, no, no! There is no way! We are absolutely not doing that!”
“Stop acting like such a petulant filly.” Chrysalis replied, now in her own resonant voice.
“I'm not acting petulant! This is just too weird!” Twilight heatedly countered.
It was even weirder now, with Chrysalis using her own voice, while still maintaining Blueblood's own very masculine, very handsome appearance.
“Oh, please. I can't imagine that this is the weirdest thing you've ever experienced. And just the smallest show of gratitude for what I'm offering might be nice.” Chrysalis replied, in a dismissive tone.
“How I can be grateful, that you're giving me the opportunity to flirt with you?!” The young princess demanded.
“You won't be flirting with Queen Chrysalis, you will be flirting with Prince Blueblood. I don't understand what is so difficult to grasp about that.” Chrysalis irritably explained.
“You're the one that's going to be Blueblood!”
“Will you please calm down? I had enough of your shouting earlier.” Chrysalis sharply retorted, earning a embarrassed look from Twilight over her outburst.
“Thank you...Now, this is very simple. We're going to sit here and walk through a simple date, one that you might have with your little popinjay. As we go along, I will helpfully be pointing out everything you do wrong. That is it.” Chrysalis calmly reiterated for the young princess.
“I don't think I can do this.” Twilight admitted, as she vigorously rubbed a hoof across her brow.
“Ugh, what exactly is the problem? Surely you've had, I don't know...tea-parties with Cadenza when you were little. It's the same principle.” Chrysalis pointed out.
“I never had any tea-parties when I was little.”
“Well, what did you do then?” The changeling demanded.
“...”
“...”
“...”
“...Well?” Chrysalis prompted again.
“...Book-fort sieges.” Twilight eventually admitted.
“Are you being serious?” The Changeling Queen asked.
“The library had a lot of books...” Twilight tried to explain, even as she shuffled her hooves around.
Chrysalis shook her, or rather Prince Blueblood's, head at this explanation “Alright. The point is you have a basic understanding of playing pretend.”
“You know that's not the main issue.” Twilight pointed out.
“For the love of- I have absolutely no romantic attraction towards you whatsoever. My interests are solely towards Celestia and nopony else...There, satisfied?”Chrysalis demanded.
“I don't-” Twilight began.
“And unless you're harboring some sort of deeply-seated romantic notions towards me-”
“What?! No!” Twilight decisively declared.
“-then there shouldn't be any reason for awkwardness. Right?” Chrysalis finished without missing a beat.
“...I guess not.” The young princess conceded to that logic. Glancing back towards Chrysalis “But are you sure you can manage to act like Blueblood, convincingly?”
“That is not going to be an issue. If I were truly interested in impersonating the little prince, it would likely be months before anypony could notice that something was amiss.” Chrysalis boasted.
“Really? I recall noticing something amiss pretty quickly, when you were impersonating Cadance.” Twilight reminded the Changeling Queen.
“As I recall, you were the only one to notice much of anything. I also recall, everypony dismissing you as a crazily-possesive little sister, before I then imprisoned you below Canterlot. Anymore smart remarks you would like to dispense?” Chrysalis countered.
“Not right now, no.” Twilight replied with a bit of a glare.
“Good...” The changeling remarked, before clearing her throat. The next words out of mouth, were spoken in the posh, masculine tones of a certain prince “...Shall we begin?”
Author's Note
I apologize for nothing.
That aside, I thought this was going to be a oneshot, but I had more ideas that I just had to slide into this little story, as always. My current plans are to next post up a guide to my version of the changelings, complete "Conversation Piece", then finish this story, then do another update for "Diamond Tiara goes to Boot Camp".
As always, if anyone has any questions or criticism, I welcome it. I hope everyone enjoys this little side-story.
Lesson Two: Accepting Defeat
Things went horribly, horribly wrong, somewhere along the way.
Twilight, quite frankly, was at a loss to explain how things had turned into such an inconceivable catastrophe. Some part of her was quick to try to lay the blame on Chrysalis and her methods. But, that feeling was quickly tossed aside as unfair. The Changeling Queen certainly played a part, but the princess couldn't in good conscience go without accepting her own role in the events that followed.
Twilight could have been better about keeping her cool, not letting Chrysalis' sharp critiques get to her so badly. Chrysalis' teaching methods were undeniably high-pressure, almost completely unlike the gentle, but firm, guidance she was used to from Princess Celestia.
'Why would you say something like that to him?'
'Are you even trying?'
'I can only assume you are actively trying to drive him away at this point.'
'That you think that is flirting, is both funny and sad.'
'Again, with the eye-contact. You're being far too intense.'
'High-level magical theory is not a good lead-in for asking someone for a second date.'
Every time Twilight erred in the slightest of ways, Chrysalis would quickly and sharply call attention to it, putting a halt to their practice-date each time. The changeling would drive it home in every instance, what she was doing wrong, and remind her of how these little mistakes could ruin every thing. They had to start from the beginning half-a-dozen times, just getting to the pretend dinner for the pretend date.
And when Twilight messed up then, they had to go back to the beginning, treading over territory she had just mastered.
Chrysalis' help had been predictably stressful for the young alicorn. Which was not at all helped, by how casual the changeling was about the whole ordeal. Twilight would have to credit Chrysalis, for her dedication to sticking to her role as a faux Prince Blueblood. It rather drove it home for Twilight, just how observant the Changeling Queen really was. Based on how Chrysalis acted around the handsome prince, Twilight wouldn't have thought that she wasted any thought on the drives and actions of the stallion.
It made her wonder, if that was simply the default mindset for Chrysalis, constantly observing and breaking down those around her. If it was, it had clearly paid off, as more than once Twilight found herself forgetting that it wasn't actually Blueblood that she was speaking with.
That had probably been a mistake on Twilight's part.
But, it had been so easy to forget, once Chrysalis was mimicking the stallion's mannerisms, voice, and form.
Especially the form.
That made her wonder just how often Chrysalis' own gaze had wandered over Prince Blueblood's physique. The Changeling Queen had repeatedly made it clear, that she found ponies physically unappealing and kind of gross. Between her relationship with Princess Celestia and the perfection in her imitation of Prince Blueblood, Twilight kind of had to wonder how honest Chrysalis was being.
It was possible that Twilight had been projecting.
That might explain some things.
She had just become so frustrated with Chrysalis' little lesson. They had been practicing small-talk, once again slipping into the dinner phase of the practice date, when Twilight had brought up Cadence. Chrysalis had immediately stopped the conversation, before slipping into her own speaking voice.
“Why in Equestria would you remind a stallion, that you're trying to romance, about his younger sister?”
“What? What did I do wrong now?”
“I assume you want a physical relationship with him, yes? Well, it might be good if he wasn't thinking about his own sister then.”
“Oh...I suppose-”
“Or for you to not draw parallels to the fact that you see her as a sister.”
“I get it, I shouldn't have-”
"Or that you are his sister-in-law.”
“Ok, ok! I see your point!”
“...Also, you're not going to want to remind him that his younger sister, used to foalsit you.”
Twilight had kind of snapped at that point, tired of Chrysalis' condescending manner and her constant criticisms. Twilight was tired of the changeling driving home how bad she was at this. And very tired of not getting a chance to try to correct her mistakes on her own.
That Chrysalis didn't seem surprised by the outburst that had ensued had been a bit infuriating, as well, making Twilight wonder if the changeling had been purposely pushing her to snap.
It ended up taking Twilight a few moments to compose herself and apologize, before explaining herself in a calmer tone. That she might make progress, if Chrysalis didn't drag everything to a halt at Twilight's every mistake. That she might improve if given a chance to learn to spot her own errors and correct them herself, rather than working to get everything perfect in one go.
Twilight should have been concerned, when Chrysalis acquiesced, agreeing to go through the whole pretend date first, before pointing out where Twilight had gone wrong.
But at the time, she had just been relieved and thankful. And, again, a bit apologetic for earlier outburst.
And it seemed like things had been working out, with this new method.
If anything, things seemed to be working out perfectly, in this latest practice run. Without the constant, looming threat of Chrysalis' sharply-worded interjections, it was easier to get into the spirit of things. It was easier to pretend that she really was on a hypothetical date with Blueblood, that they were chatting over a nice dinner, that she could actually handle romancing the stallion without things blowing up in her face.
They'd moved on from there, pretending to go for a walk after dinner, with Blueblood going through all the motions of propriety and politeness. Yes, it was just the two of them walking in a circle in Princess Celestia's study, but she could suppress her sense of disbelief. Twilight was beginning to think if a date could go like this, then things would be perfectly fine.
Then came those words that had been building up over the whole course of the practice date.
“Perhaps this was a bad idea...”
For a moment, Twilight had thought that it had been Chrysalis breaking character, but she noted that the words were uttered in Prince Blueblood's cultured tones.
“I-...Why? What's wrong?”
“Oh, nothing, nothing. I clearly just misread your signals, Twilight. The fault lies with me.”
“Signals?”
“Well...yes. I shouldn't have been so ready to assume that you were...romantically open.”
“What? Aren't we on a-”
“As I said, there lies no fault with you. If I'd realized your intentions were simply friendly, we could have avoided this whole mess...I suppose, that I shall have to be the one to explain the mix-up to Cadence...”
“Cadence?”
“Oh, yes. She was just so excited when I mentioned this to her, so very supportive...”
“Hold on! I am romantically open, where are you getting this notion that I'm not?!”
“Well...”
Twilight really wished she had stuck with Chrysalis' original method. She'd thought things had been going well, that she had been charming and flirty and everything that was supposed to go into a date.
According to Blueblood she ended up being a total bore.
And rude, as well.
“But, I thought you hated those Princess Purple Prose novels!”
“I do! That doesn't mean you have to go around pointing out every little thing you find wrong with them!”
“I was trying to help, I thought that if I could offer some helpful-”
“I'm afraid all you've done is helped me see how terrible my writing is. I suppose, never should have even bothered!”
“Wait, I-”
“And for the last time, they were meant to be satirical!”
When Blueblood started storming away, Twilight tried to stop him.
“Please! Please, just give me another chance! I can do better, I can-”
“Twilight, please. You are only making this more difficult.”
“But, I-”
“You clearly lack even the slightest hint of romantic feelings for-”
Twilight kissed him.
Mid-sentence and with no small amount of force.
And desperation.
...And maybe a bit too much tongue.
…
…
…Yep. That was the point where things had gone terribly wrong.
It took Twilight a few too many moments, to remember that she wasn't out on Canterlots Streets for a romantic walk under the stars. She wasn't watching, as her first attempt at a romantic relationship blew up in her face. She wasn't really out on a date with a handsome stallion.
And it wasn't a stallion she had just Prenched.
Twilight's eyes snapped open, just in time to see the fading green light of Chrysalis' transformation magic being dispelled. And there was the Changeling Queen's face, cupped between Twilight's hooves, staring at the young princess with a look of confusion and mild shock.
'Well...I don't know how you're going to get out of this one...' Twilight's mind observed, as the seconds wore on 'On the bright side, it could still be much, much worse...'
Twilight heard the distinctive sound of the door to the study opening.
“Oh...what's this?” Came the unmistakable voice of her mentor, Princess Celestia.
Finally snapping back to her senses, Twilight quickly pulled away from the bemused changeling, before putting her tongue back in her own mouth. Turning frantically towards her mentor, Twilight blurted out “It's not what it looks like!”
Princess Celestia merely raised an eyebrow at this.
“Although, if what it looks like, is your student forcibly working her tongue into my mouth...” Chrysalis casually said, with a wave of her hoof.
“Oh, Sweet Stars Above! That- We were-...My tongue was in her mouth!” Twilight babbled, before spending several moments spitting, as she tried to forget the warm, squishy sensation.
“Well, maybe you shouldn't have Prenched me like that, if you think it's so bad in there.” Chrysalis griped, a bit offended by Twilight's visceral reaction to kissing her.
“Your tongue felt so weird!” Twilight countered, frantically wiping her mouth with a hoof now, eliciting a roll of the changeling's eyes.
“If I might be provided some context?” Princess Celestia patiently interjected.
“It seems, that I may have accidentally seduced your student, Celestia.” Chrysalis noted.
Furrowing her brow at this, Celestia turned towards the Changeling Queen “How does one go about accidentally seducing someone?”
“You would have to ask Twilight.” Chrysalis replied, with a shrug.
“I swear to you, Princess Celestia, I didn't mean for this to happen!” Twilight declared.
“It's alright, Twilight. I'd just like an explanation.” Celestia calmly reiterated for the panicked Twilight.
“We were- that is...with Blueblood-...” Twilight haltingly began.
“Yes? What about my nephew?” The Sun Princess prodded.
Twilight couldn't help but gulp down, as she tried to find a way to explain the situation, that wouldn't upset anypony.
“For the love of- Twilight doesn't know how to go about romancing your nephew, so I offered to assist with some practice scenarios. I suppose, she got a bit too caught up in the moment, forgot that I wasn't the little peacock, and kissed me....Now, was that so hard?” Chrysalis demanded, the last part directed towards a chagrined Twilight.
“Oh...I'm guessing you assumed Blueblood's form, for these practice scenarios?” Celestia asked, taking this whole thing remarkably well. At the nod from Chrysalis, Celestia came back with her own nod “Well, I suppose I can understand that.”
“You can?” Twilight asked, dumbfounded by this mild reaction from her mentor. Briefly gulping down some anxiety “You don't think, that I-...”
“Was trying to seduce me away from her? How could she get that idea?” Chrysalis snarkily offered.
Twilight couldn't help but cringe and duck her head in embarrassment.
Celestia merely met this with a patient smile “While it's certainly flattering to think that there's somepony out there so envious of my relationship with Chryssie, that they would attempt to steal her away from me...I do think we have to be realistic about the odds of that happening.”
With that, she sent a playful glance towards the changeling in the room.
“Oh, is this part where I take offense and ask what that is supposed to mean?” Chrysalis dryly asked.
“If you wouldn't mind?” Celestia prodded lightly.
“...No. I see where this is going.” Chrysalis snappily claimed.
“Oh?”
“Yes, you'll carry on with your little suggestion that I am much too foul-tempered for anypony to try to seduce away from you. I will predictably take offense, and then you'll turn it around by claiming that you find my temper charming or some such thing...I'm not taking your bait.” The Changeling Queen declared.
This was met with a pouty look from Princess Celestia “...Pretty please?”
“Afraid not. I deserve more effort than that from you.”
“You certainly do.” Celestia followed up with a serene smile, earning a mild look of annoyance from Chrysalis.
“...I saw that coming, as well.” The changeling muttered.
“Uhm...” Twilight interjected regaining Princess Celestia's attention “...So, you understand that nothing was happening, and this was just a case of...bad timing and stress?”
Celestia gave a chuckle at that “Twilight. In my long years, I've come to realize that more often than not, that when somepony claims 'It isn't what it looks like' that it isn't actually what it looks like.”
Twilight gave a hesitant smile at that, relieved by her mentor's understanding.
“Though, I do have to ask...what's so wrong that you needed such help in dating my nephew?” Celestia asked with a mixture of concern and curiosity.
“Apart from her ghastly kissing-technique?” Chrysalis interjected.
“We've already-” Twilight began.
“Ghastly? How ghastly?” Celestia asked, her curiosity piqued.
Chrysalis rose a hole-filled hoof to her chin, as she considered the question “Well, her timing wasn't terrible. The problems really lie with her technique, and I would say that I'm being generous by calling it at a...C minus.”
“...C minus?!” Twilight exclaimed, shocked by the low grade. Shaking her head at this, Twilight looked up at Chrysalis “You can't be-”
“A C minus, Chrysalis?” Celestia prompted, cutting Twilight off before she could gain any momentum.
“At best.”
Twilight couldn't help but gape at this, wondering where she could have gone wrong.
“Where exactly did Twilight go wrong?” Celestia calmly asked, with a gesture of her hoof, apparently of the same mind as Twilight.
“I would like to know, as well.” Twilight quickly agreed. She couldn't remember a time when she had gotten so low a grade...well, apart from that one time. But, that failing grade had ultimately proven non-consequential, and-
“It would really be easier to demonstrate than explain.” Chrysalis said, breaking Twilight from her thoughts.
Celestia quickly nodded, before trotting over to Chrysalis' side “Very well, how shall we go about this?”
After only a brief moment of consideration, the Changeling Queen used her magic, causing a bright, green fire to burst around her form.
“Why do you need to look like me for this?!” Twilight demanded, seeing that the form that Chrysalis had adopted had been her own.
Twilight's doppelganger gave a very un-Twilight-like look at this, but Princess Celestia held her hoof up forestalling a remark from Chrysalis. With a look towards her former student “Please, Twilight, let's have a bit of maturity about this. I would very much like to understand Chrysalis' meaning, so that we can resolve this effectively.”
The young princess couldn't help but grit her teeth at this. On the one hoof, she couldn't really bring herself to go against Princess Celestia's word. On the other...she really didn't want to see herself forcibly Prenching a pony that was like a second mother to her.
“Alright, now...Where were we Chrysalis?” Celestia asked, all business now.
“Well, let's see...” Chrysalis said, in Twilight's own voice “...We were just wrapping up the pretend dinner, when I decided the timing was appropriate to expose her to the consequences of her seemingly small mistakes. It seemed prudent to expose her to the worst-case scenario. For her numerous blunders, you see.”
Twilight was again chagrined, with her actions being described as 'blunders'. Even moreso, when Princess Celestia gave a nod, not challenging Chrysalis' description of the events.
“I, as Blueblood, was getting ready to storm off, after being quite thoroughly offended. I turned and-...” Chrysalis, still in Twilight's form, made a gesture for Celestia to turn away.
Twilight quickly averted her own gaze, sensing what was about to happen.
Judging by the...mortifying sounds coming from outside of her line-of-sight, her prediction had been correct. Twilight made a point of swiveling her ears away, even as she shuffled about on her hooves uncomfortably.
After about thirty seconds of waiting, and a brief flash of green magic caught from her peripheral vision, Twilight hesitantly peeked back towards the two Royals. There was Chrysalis, back in her natural form, calmly watching Princess Celestia.
Her long-time mentor, had a terribly bemused look on her face.
After several moments of silence, the Princess of the Sun opened her mouth before closing it. Glancing towards an anxious Twilight, before settling her gaze back upon Chrysalis “...What was she doing with her teeth?”
Chrysalis gave a shrug, before gesturing a hoof back towards Twilight.
“Oh. Oh, my. That was just-...just dreadful.” Celestia said to herself, before turning her attention back towards Twilight “I hope you haven't done that with Blueblood yet?”
“I-...No?” Twilight offered.
“Well, thank goodness for that. I can see now why you came seeking assistance, my student. That was the wisest course, I think.” Princess Celestia said.
“That wasn't what I came here to-” Twilight tried to interject.
“And, Chrysalis, that was not a C minus kiss.” The pale alicorn sternly told the apparently ambivalent Changeling Queen.
“I gave her a few points for her timing.” Chrysalis lightly pointed out.
“Even so, letting her believe that this was a passable effort only harms Twilight. And Blueblood for that matter. She very much needs to work on her technique if she's going to be kissing my nephew, and calling that anything other than a failure, might lead her to believing she doesn't need to practice.” The Princess of the Sun continued to chastise, leading Chrysalis to rolling her eyes.
Celestia narrowed her eyes at this “I'm sorry, Chrysalis, but that was simply irresponsible of you. For any student-teacher relationship to work, there needs to be upfront and honest feedback. I hope you will keep that in-mind as you assist Twilight?”
“Yes, yes, it's fine.” Chrysalis haphazardly agreed.
“I'm not so sure that it's such a good idea, for me to-” Twilight began.
“It doesn't have to be Chrysalis that you practice your kissing technique with, or anything else of that nature. I can understand how that might make you uncomfortable.” Celestia quickly assured.
“...Do you?” Twilight couldn't help but ask, wondering if her mentor had any notion of how uncomfortable she was.
Before Princess Celestia could respond, the sound of a knock and a male voice clearing their throat came from the direction of the door. There, standing in the doorway, was a youngish unicorn stallion adjusting the large pair of glasses sitting on his nose.
“I'm sorry to interrupt, Your Highness. But, I'm afraid that it's quite important that we go over my numbers before the day is out.” The mousy stallion quietly, almost timidly, noted.
“Of course, Counting Coin. I'll be along momentarily.” Princess Celestia replied with a nod, allowing the unicorn to turn and quickly leave. Loosing a sigh, Celestia turned her attention back towards the young princess “It seems duty calls. I'm afraid I must go, before anything else piles up.”
Twilight eagerly nodded at this, ready for any way to end this conversation.
“But, I do expect you to take your own initiative, when it comes to this issue. I won't balk if it proves necessary, but I would sooner not have to take the time to fashion a study course, when things are so busy.” The elder princess quickly followed up, eliciting a slightly more bewildered and hesitant nod from Twilight.
“Excellent.” Celestia said with a smile. Taking a few steps towards Twilight, before raising a hoof to embrace the younger princess “And, as always, it's a pleasure to see you Twilight. I hope you can come by again, when I'm less busy.”
“Y-yeah. I would like that.” Twilight quickly agreed.
“I look forward to hearing on your progress.” With that, Celestia released Twilight. Turning towards Chrysalis, who was still quietly sitting off to the side “I'll be seeing you in a little while, Chryssie. I take it that you will be joining myself and Luna for dinner this evening?”
The Changeling Queen gave a shrug “I have no particular plans.”
Celestia gave a small smile at that, before approaching the changeling and giving her a short embrace as well.
With that done, Celestia made her way back to the study's exit “I look forward to it. I hope you both remember what I said.”
And with that, the busy princess made her wait out the door, Twilight watching in numb silence the whole time.
An uncomfortable quiet overtook the room as the door closed behind Princess Celestia, leaving Twilight alone with the Changeling Queen.
The Changeling Queen she just Prenched a few minutes ago.
Quietly clearing her throat, Twilight finally spoke-up “Maybe, I should go...”
“...Hm, she forgot to make her move.” Chrysalis noted, without any apparent regard for Twilight's remark. The young princess turned to find the changeling staring down at her chess board from before, in mild annoyance.
“...I'm just going to go.” Twilight said, seemingly to herself.
“Afraid you won't be able to keep from throwing yourself at me again?” Chrysalis evenly asked.
“That is not what happened!” Twilight suddenly blurted out.
“Oh, do calm down. Now that I know to keep my guard up, I won't be letting anymore of your lustful advances-” The changeling went on, much too casually.
“I forgot you weren't Blueblood! I would never have done something so-...” Twilight began before snapping her mouth shut, remembering her earlier disgusted reaction and the offended look on Chrysalis' face from before. More than once, already, she had inadvertently insulted the changeling. And, while Chrysalis was merciless in her teasing and prodding, it wasn't really fair for her to assume that the Changeling Queen wasn't trying to help.
And Twilight knew that she should feel a bit of shame for hurting anyone's feelings, intentionally or not.
“Never would have what?” The Changeling Queen calmly prompted.
“I-...I'm sorry about my reaction earlier.” Twilight eventually said.
This earned a tilt of Chrysalis' head, as if to say that she was listening.
“I wasn't thinking and I'm...not attracted to you in that way. I was a bit shocked when I realized that I had-...realized what happened.” Twilight continued.
Seeing the quirk of the changeling's eyebrow, Twilight swallowed before continuing “As traumatizing as it may have been...thank you, for trying to help.”
“...Anything else you would like to add?” Chrysalis prompted, as she casually examined one of her hooves.
Twilight had to resist the urge to roll her eyes, settling for avoiding Chrysalis' gaze “...It wasn't disgusting. Just...really weird and uncomfortable. Sorry.”
“Well...any discomfort that was to be had, I think, lies with you. That really was a terrible kiss.” Chrysalis remarked.
“...Right.” Twilight sullenly said.
“I would recommend that fashionable friend of yours.” Chrysalis added.
“...What?”
“Rarity, I believe it was? Of your friends, she seems like the one that could help the most, whilst keeping quiet about it.” The changeling clarified.
“Are you-...Are you suggesting that I practice kissing with Rarity?!” Twilight blurted out.
“Yes? What's wrong with that?” Chrysalis asked, with earnest confusion.
“It's wildly inappropriate for one thing!”
“You're her friend and you need help. She seems like the sort to know how to actually kiss somepony.” Chrysalis pointed out.
“Well, yes, but-” Twilight began.
“Apart from that shy friend of yours, she seems the most likely to keep a secret.”
“Probably-”
“I don't think she's pursuing Blueblood right now, so there doesn't seem to be a conflict of interest.”
Twilight grit her teeth, frustrated by her inability to raise a cogent point against the suggestion “That may be, but...”
“But?”
“Well...how's me kissing another mare going to-”
“Who better to teach you how to go about kissing a stallion as a mare?” Chrysalis quickly countered.
Twilight couldn't help but consider that point, before realizing that she couldn't come up with a fair argument against it. Perhaps if she had more time...But, maybe Chrysalis' point was a valid one, and-
Twilight quickly shook her head, before making a crossing motion with her forehooves “No. I can't do that. It's...I'm just not comfortable with it. I don't know how Rarity will react, but-...”
Twilight finished that thought with a vigorous shake of her head. Rarity was quite lovely, but Twilight didn't want to risk the awkwardness she had just been put through coming up between her and one of her friends.
Chrysalis seemed to consider this for a moment, before focusing back on Twilight “I suppose, you could have one of my subjects teach you.”
Twilight couldn't formulate a response to this calmly delivered suggestion.
“I'm sure we could find one that is willing and able to teach. One that you don't have any relationship with to potentially jeopardize. Many of my infiltrators are, no doubt, sitting around with nothing to do right now.” Chrysalis elaborated.
“...You are not going to order one of your changelings to help me practice kissing.” Twilight firmly declared.
“Why not? I've given such orders before.” The Changeling Queen pointed out.
“You've ordered them to practice kissing before?”
“Among other things. Pretending to be a functioning member of pony society takes quite a bit of effort and study...Which, I'm sure you're just now realizing.” Chrysalis pointed out.
Twilight tried to come up with a response to that, before giving up. Shaking her head, as she began to turn to leave the study, the young princess audibly muttered to herself “I was just trying to get some advice, not...”
Twilight loosed a heavy sigh, just as she rose her hoof to the door's handle.
“Wait.”
The young princess blinked, at the sudden order, before looking over her shoulder to the Changeling Queen “What is it?”
She found that Chrysalis had fixed her with a firm gaze. Not a few seconds later, the changeling pointed a hoof to the other side of the chessboard “Sit.”
“I don't-” Twilight began.
“Sit now.”
Twilight soon found herself slowly walking to the chess board, watching the changeling as she did the same. As if by some mutually agreed upon signal, they both took their respective seats.
“Now...if you think you can keep your depraved sexual fantasies about myself and Celestia to yourself-” Chrysalis started.
“I do not have depraved sexual fantasies!” Twilight angrily declared.
“Fine...perfectly-normal sexual fantasies about myself and-”
“I'm not having sexual fantasies about anyone!”
“Well, that's just tragic. There's not a single dirty thought in your head?” Chrysalis asked.
“No!” Twilight emphatically denied.
“Such a creative mind, and you haven't imagined a single instance of your princess and I...enjoying one another?”
“Definitely not.” Twilight agreed.
“What about now?” Chrysalis asked with a smirk.
“No, I-...” Twilight came up short, as she realized the gears in her mind were turning, very much without her permission. A precise, vivid image started to paint itself across her mind, leading to her slapping her hood across her eyes “-Dammit!”
Chrysalis loosed an amused chuckle at this reaction.
Setting her hoof down, the young princess sent a harsh glare towards the changeling “Would you please stop doing that!”
“Stop making it so easy.” Chrysalis countered.
“I'm leaving.” Twilight abruptly declared, before rising to her hooves. She was just about to turn, to stomp away, when she caught the glow of Chrysalis' magic from the corner of her eye. Her backhooves quickly slipped out from under her, leading her rump to crash back down.
“Not so fast.” The changeling said.
“I am not going to stay here, just so you can keeping messing with me, Chrysalis. I have-” Twilight angrily began.
“Fine. No more 'messing' with you.” Chrysalis quickly agreed.
The young princess blinked in surprise, before narrowing her gaze again “You promise?”
“Yes. Just my advice.” The Changeling Queen assured.
“...Not any sort of weird advice, meant just to make me uncomfortable?” Twilight pressed.
“Yes.”
Twilight furrowed her brow in consideration, openly scrutinizing the changeling. After a few moments, she sighed, realizing that she could use some sort of earnest advice “Alright...And you promised.”
Chrysalis nodded at this reminder “Yes, I did.”
“Ok...so, what's your advice?”
“Make your move.”
“I'm sorry?” Twilight asked, with a tilt of her head.
“It's your move.”
“My move...what move?”
Chrysalis pointedly glanced towards the chess set sitting between them.
“Oh...” Twilight said, mostly to herself, bemused by this turn of events. After a bit of staring, the young princess turned her gaze towards the chess game in-progress. Maybe the Changeling Queen had some sort of special point that she wanted to make. Though, what point could she convey, that needed a chess set?
Looking back towards the changeling sitting across from her, another thought crossed Twilight's mind “Wait. Isn't this game between you and Princess Celestia? Is it really alright if I just...take over?”
“It's fine. She had her opportunity.” Chrysalis quickly replied.
“Are you sure? I don't want to get caught in the midd-...I don't want to come between-...I don't want to stir up trouble.” Twilight carefully hedged, correctly herself before she could accidentally give the changeling anymore material to tease her with.
“It's not going to stir up any trouble.” Chrysalis assured.
“Alright...”
The Changeling Queen let out at a sigh, at this hesitant response “When Celestia finds out, I will tell her that it was my idea...As she realizes just how inconsiderate she was, by ignoring our game, I will personally assure her that having you take over had nothing to do with her. I shall be absolutely polite and even tempered about it. So much so, that she will find it suspect. And yet, nothing will come of it. Weeks will pass, until she again decides that I need to 'socialize' leading to my stubborn refusal. She'll press me on this issue, then I will bring this day up as a means of guilt-tripping her into letting me not go.”
Twilight stared.
“Seeing as surprises are so frightening for you, knowing exactly how that will play out should be rather comforting, I would think.” Chrysalis observed.
“Wait, so this-...this game has nothing to do with your advice. You just want me to play so you can get leverage against Princess Celestia? So you won't have to attend a hypothetical social event?” The young princess demanded, flabbergasted by this detailed accounting of what was to come.
“Of course not...I'll still be attending this hypothetical event.” Chrysalis dismissively replied.
“I- then why even do all of that then?” Twilight asked, not understanding.
“The point, is that I would have the emotional leverage I need to keep her from guilt-tripping me to go along with her idea...Then going along with her idea anyway, because she cares. It's not so complicated, so please try to keep up.” Chrysalis explained, as if it was all terribly simple.
“...All of that, just so you could do something nice for her?”
“If you want to simplify things like that...” Chrysalis conceded.
“And that's...normal to you?”
“Does Celestia strike you as 'normal'?
“I...suppose not.” Twilight eventually said. Rubbing her hoof through her mane, the alicorn looked back towards Chrysalis “It's just, that's like....flirting between you two, isn't it?”
“We like to keep things mentally stimulating.” The changeling said, not disagreeing.
“OK...So, I guess I'll make a move then.” Twilight eventually said, before turning back to the chess board. With her mind still trying to process the strange form of affection that took place between her mentor and the changeling, it took her a few moments to notice what was wrong with the chessboard.
“What?” Twilight said to herself, as she realized why it was taking her so long to make a move.
The chessboard was a total mess, the pieces spread across the board in a manner that seemed almost completely at odds with the goals of the game. The pawns were utterly failing to control board space, key pieces were backed into corners, and it looked as if pieces on both sides were purposely being used to funnel enemy pieces towards their own kings.
She'd normally chalk up such a board layout to a couple of completely new players. But, it was just so utterly consistent in it's wrongness, that one couldn't even accidentally be in such a bad set-up.
Twilight would need a dozen moves or more, just to sort her own side of the board out.
“Figured it out?” Chrysalis said, breaking Twilight from her analysis. Having gotten the alicorn's attention, the changeling turned her own gaze to the board “We play our own variant. All the same rules, but your goal is to get the opponent to checkmate your king.”
“How does that even work, though? How can you make your opponent win?” Twilight asked, as she tried to wrap her mind around the idea.
“With a great deal of difficulty. Which is precisely the point.”
“Do you use turn number limits or do you-”
“We don't usually limit the number of turns and, as I said, we otherwise use the standard rules...There are a few tricks involved, that I'm sure you'll figure out...eventually.” Chrysalis explained.
“OK. But, how does this pertain to your advice for me?”
“It doesn't. I'm just bored. So, please start considering your move.” Chrysalis pressed, with a bit of impatience.
“But, you do have some advice for me, right?” Twilight pressed.
“Yes.”
This elicited a small frown from the alicorn, which quickly was focused back upon the chessboard. This seemed like a rather insane way to play the game and this situation seemed like an even more insane way to get some simple dating advice, but...
Twilight moved her piece.
“Interesting. Realistically, what do you think the worst-case scenario between you and Blueblood could be?” Chrysalis quickly segued, even as she considered the board.
The young princess had to clear her throat at that question “Well, if I had to guess...exactly what happened when we were practicing. Without the kiss, I mean.”
“And what would the consequences of that scenario be?”
“He and I breaking up? Blueblood wanting nothing to do with me? Cadence and Princess Celestia being disappointed that things didn't work out? And...” Twilight offered, her ears and head drooping with each possibility she listed.
“Failure, to put it simply.” Chrysalis supplied.
After a few seconds, Twilight nodded her head.
The changeling used her magic to move one of her own pieces, using a bishop to threaten Twilight's own king “And that's as bad as it gets. Some harsh feelings and embarrassment before you're forced to move on, yes?”
“I know it's not the worst thing I've had to deal with, but-” Twilight began, seeing where this was going.
“Let me supply an even more terrible scenario for you.” Chrysalis abruptly cut-in. Seeing Twilight's ears perk up, the changeling continued knowing that she had the alicorn's attention “You learn everything you need to know about him. You get everything down to precise perfection. You do absolutely everything you need to do to get him to fall in love, marry you, and etc...”
“I don't understand.” Twilight quickly admitted.
“You convince him that you are his perfect match...even if you aren't. You put on the perfect facade for him and spend the rest of his life feeding into a lie.”
“Oh...Oh, I see.” Twilight said, even as she used a hoof to move her king.
“Yes. That might be somewhat worse, than a messy, but short, break-up.” The changeling said, as she quickly moved one of her own pieces.
Twilight nodded at that, before seizing upon a thought “But, what if- what if we really are well-suited to be with each other, and we just need the time to-”
“If you are compatible, then you don't need to put forth any special effort. But, if you're not, are you going to try to force yourself to be compatible? Lie to him, until either he finds out you aren't who you made yourself out to be or you start to resent him for making you go through upholding the facade? All because, you're afraid that your first relationship might fall through?” Chrysalis relentlessly pressed.
Twilight couldn't respond to that, instead focusing upon the chessboard. After some quiet fidgeting, the young princess moved her own piece without saying anything.
“My advice, is for you to reconsider your goals.” Chrysalis supplied, before moving one of her own pieces to, again, threaten Twilight's king. This was something of a relief for Twilight, as it gave something for her mind to ponder, instead of the heavy topic that was currently weighing upon her.
The young alicorn pursed her lips, before making her own move.
Back-and-forth, the two made their moves in relative silence. Her thoughts roiled and parsed apart everything that she had been told, everything that she knew, as she looked for the connections between everything. She didn't let up, even as Chrysalis quietly pressed her in their game.
Then it struck her.
“Checkmate.” Twilight triumphantly declared, eliciting a confused look from the Changeling Queen.
Chrysalis' king was indeed in checkmate.
“...I think you've misunderstood the point of the game.” Chrysalis observed with a frown, even as she noted Twilight's smile.
“I don't think so.” Twilight confidently replied.
This was met by a raised eyebrow from the changeling.
“The point of the game, was to show me that I couldn't win by pursuing the goal I thought I was supposed to pursue. I don't have enough experience with this way of playing, just like I don't have enough experience with, you know, dating. So, I needed to change my approach, right?” Twilight proudly explained.
Taking the lack of a response from Chrysalis as permission to continue, Twilight gestured a hoof towards the changeling “It's just like with you and Princess Celestia.”
“What?” Chrysalis blurted out.
“You were both dissatisfied with the notion of beating one another, so you changed your goals. You prolonged the game until there was a point where you could both win. Just like here. You win because I took your king and I win because I changed my goal to taking your king.” Twilight excitedly explained, the connections and parallels quickly aligning themselves in her mind.
“Is that so?” Chrysalis asked.
“Yes! You were right! I have been going about this the wrong way with Blueblood. I tried to set having a perfect date as my goal, when my proper goal should have been seeing to it that we're happy together. Like you and Princess Celestia.”
“I think, you may-” The Changeling Queen began.
“Not to say that, I shouldn't improve myself. To draw another parallel to the chessboard, you and Princess Celestia could only have achieved all of that through gaining a deep understanding of one another. And I do still need to learn how to...date Blueblood, but so that I can facilitate the reaching of my real goals! I need to keep it going long enough to figure out if we can make it work, instead of trying to force it to work!” Twilight declared, out-of-breath from the outpouring of words she had just gone through..
“...”
“...”
“...”
“...”
Chrysalis abruptly loosed a sigh, before looking back towards the beaming princess “...Sure, we'll go with that.”
“Wait. That was what you were trying to convey, right?” Twilight asked, thrown by this response.
“Not really. I was trying to tell you that you need to learn to be selfish every once in a while.” Chrysalis admitted.
“...Are you messing with me again?” Twilight asked, a bit suspicious.
“It doesn't matter. You're pleased with the advice I gave, yes?” The Changeling Queen asked.
“But-”
“It doesn't really matter how we reached our goals, does it? I helped you. You have a better hold of this blossoming little relationship of yours.” Chrysalis added.
“Uhm...well, I guess when you lay it out like that...” Twilight conceded. After a moment of thought, she found her brow furrowing, before she focused back upon Chrysalis “So, everything I just described, was wrong?”
“Completely.”
“Really?”
“Yes.”
“So, all of the parallels I described between this chess game and your relationship with Princess Celestia; you don't see any of that as valid?” Twilight pressed, a bit skeptical now.
“...Start setting up the board.” Chrysalis suddenly ordered.
“What?”
“We're playing again.”
Author's Note
Alright, that finishes up this little side-story. As per usual, I'll be seeing to some edits over the next few days. I hope everyone enjoyed this latest update. As always, I welcome any questions or will take in consideration any criticisms.
One side note, I have not yet watched the Season 5 premiere. So please do me the favor of sparing me of any spoilers. Thanks-in-advance.
Enjoy.
