“Now remember, Rainbow Dash...” Applejack tilted the brim of her hat forward, giving her shadowed glare some extra edge. “We only need the bare essentials for this here shindig. So, no goin' overboard.”
“Hey! Chillax, AJ!” Rainbow spun loopty-loops in the air as she gradually hovered her way uphill past the boundaries of Sweet Apple Acres. She looked back at the porch where Applejack stood, smirking confidently. “No way in Tartarus am I gonna ruin Apple Bloom's birthday! As a matter of fact, I'm gonna make it Grade-A Awesome!”
“Just stick to the gul-durn list Granny wrote down, ya hear?” Applejack pointed. “And let Big Mac do all the buyin'.”
“Hmmm?” Rainbow Dash blinked, then swiveled about to look down the hill.
Slowly—at a sluggish one mile per hour—Big Macintosh came trotting around the bend. He wore a large burlap saddlebag while dangling a sack of bits from his freckled muzzle.
“Oh please!” Rainbow stuck her tongue out, then smirked. “Gimme a few coins! I'll go zoom ahead and see if anything's on clearance at the hardware store!”
“Nuh uh! You wanna help? You stick with Big Macintosh!” With a swish of her blonde tail hairs, Applejack marched back into the Sweet Apple Acres farmhouse. “Or else you don't get to have any of the cider punch at tomorrow night's party!”
“Awwwwwwwwwww...” Rainbow Dash folded her forelimbs, her blue face turning indigo with a grumpy pout. “But he's so darn slow!”
Big Macintosh let loose a light chuckle, his lips curving around the teeth clutching the bit bag.
“Meh...” Rainbow motioned forward towards the edge of town. “Come on, big fella.” She hovered ahead on limp wingfeathers. “Guess you're the engine of the birthday train. So get a move on, will ya?”
“Hmmm...” Big Mac tossed the bit bag into one of his satchels and shuffled along at a leisurely pace in the noonday sun. “Eeyup.”
“So... lemme get this straight...” Rainbow Dash hovered upside down, her ruby eyes squinting as she read the list with Granny Smith's chicken scratches. “...we're to get the materials to build a 'sailboat playset?'” Rainbow looked over at Big Mac, her prismatic hair dangling beneath her. “How old is Apple Bloom turning anyways, five?”
“Eenope.” Big Mac inhaled the sweet fragrance of wildflowers lingering on either side of the country path.
“Six?”
Big Mac shook his head.
Rainbow Dash twirled until she was upright. With a bright-eyed blink, she murmured, “Seven and a half?”
Big Mac looked aside and held one hoof up in mid-trot.
Rainbow winced. “Eight?!”
“Eeyup.”
“Yeesh... I guess kids grow up slow on a farm.”
Big Mac frowned.
“Er... I-I didn't mean anything bad by that,” Rainbow said with a nervous snicker, curling her forelimbs inward. “It's just that... like... when I was eight, I was waaaaaaaaay past kiddy slides and cloud playgrounds.” She grinned devilishly. “I was all about speed and winning!” She twirled and glided upside down, her forelimbs in a “reclining” position behind her petite head. “Yup! Fastest filly in her grade for five years straight!” She frowned into the bright blue sky. “So what if they didn't count me half of the time. Not like I was the only filly to drop out.”
Big Macintosh cleared his throat.
“Huh?” Rainbow Dash looked at him, at the list in her grasp, then at him again. “Eh heheh...” She blushed around clenched teeth. “Yeah, I guess you'll be wanting this back now.”
Big Mac merely smiled, calmly taking the sheet back from the tiny pegasus and slipping it beneath his yoke.
“Really, though, I guess it's okay for Apple Bloom to wanna be a lil' foal for another year... or two... or three...” Rainbow Dash “swam” sideways through the air, circling Big Mac with wings a-flapping. “Still, why's she so into pirates though? I mean... we're totally a million miles away from any ocean!”
Big Macintosh shrugged, tilting his head up to watch a pair of red robins chasing each other in the air, tweeting.
“According to my dad, when I was four, I was super big on dinosaurs. Can you believe that? Dinosaurs?” Rainbow rolled her eyes, letting loose a wheezy giggle. “How does a four-year-old get into that? It's egghead stuff! I mean, it's not like I was reading at age four. Still, didn't change the fact that I had pictures of stegaceratops all over my room. Or... wait... Trisaurus rex? Gosh... I forget their stupid names. Y'know... the... uh...” She hovered right in front of Big Mac, flying in reverse. “...the pointy ones, with the thingies on their backs? The pointy thingies?”
The stallion stared blankly at her, trotting ever so slowly.
Rainbow raised an eyebrow. “You really don't talk much, do you?”
Big Mac shrugged yet again. “Eeenope.”
“Why not? You dumb?”
Big Macintosh's eyes glared.
“Er... I-I meant literally! You know...” Rainbow Dash pointed at his throat. “Like you got your voice box damaged as an infant like that dude in the Expendabucks... or... uhm... b-but then again how would you be able to say 'Eeyup' and 'Eenope'? Ugh...” She pulled at her fuzzy blue face muscles and flew on ahead, grumbling. “I should just shut up.”
Big Mac chuckled, his freckled face smirking.
“It's just weird, y'know?” Rainbow stole a glance over her shoulder. "'Cuz your sister talks so much. And yet you're quieter than a rock. A big heavy red rock.”
“Heh... eeyup.”
“Seriously!” Rainbow growled. “Would it kill ya to fly any faster?! The hardware store is—like—within eyeshot now!”
In response, Big Mac merely hummed to himself, shuffling like molasses over the crest of the hill.
Rainbow moaned, finally resorting to a limp glide as she waited for the stallion to catch up.
Big Macintosh stood in an aisle, staring at a brown plank of wood. He scratched his chin, green eyes narrowing. Then, with quiet grace, he turned his head and looked at a yellow plank of wood. He scratched his head some more.
FWOOOSH! Rainbow Dash flew up to him, holding up papery paint samples.
“How about this?! Huh? Huh?” She grinned. “'Onyx Glass!' It totally looks like a black ghost pirate ship color!”
Big Mac shrugged.
“Hrmmf... Oooh! Be right back!” FWOOOSH! She disappeared in a blue streak.
Big Mac turned to stare at the brown plank of wood again. His nostrils flared, and he turned his head to look at the yellow plank. He gave it a close sniff.
FW-FWOOSH! “Check this out!” Rainbow Dash levitated at eye level, holding up plastic equine skulls. “They totally had a 'Nightmare Night' aisle left over from four months ago! I mean... heh... how lame is that!” She waggled her eyebrows. “These things were mispriced at half off. I bet you I could haggle us a deal!”
The stallion gave her one glance. “Hrmmmff...” He trained his eyes back on the planks of wood, studying them deeper.
“Eh... you're right... Apple Bloom just wants a pirates themed party. Not ghost pirates. That's totally a Scoots thing anyways.” Rainbow scrunched her eyes shut. “Hrnnnnnnnnnghhh!” Her temple throbbed as she thought hard. “Oooh! Hah! Killer! I got it!” FWOOOOSH! She was gone.
Big Macintosh's red-orange mane settled back in place. He looked between the two planks of wood. Finally, making sure nopony in the hardware store was looking, he leaned in and gave the brown plank a lick... then the yellow one. He swirled his tongue around inside his mouth, then smirked.
“Eeeyup.”
“Grnnngh... mfmmmffghhh...” Rainbow Dash was trotting backwards—or at least trying to. Her rear legs, wings, and tail all flailed in agony as he struggled against all odds to tug a big bag of brown mulch across the concrete floor. “Mmmfff... I... f-found... the most... mmmmmm-perfect bedding... for the inside... of th-the pirate ship... guhhhh...” Her jaw's grip popped loose, and she fell back on her petite blue rump. “Ow!” Her voice cracked. Within a heartbeat, she had hopped up to her hooves, striking a cool pose as she nonchalantly brushed her limbs off. “I... uh... I meant to do that!” The mare slicked her bangs back, coolly eyeing the edges of the store. “Total Wonderbolt Academy material here. Gotta practice for crashing in inclement weather, y'know...”
By then, Big Mac had put up the brown length of wood and gathered up ten whole yellow planks. He effortlessly laid them over his shoulder. Then, trotting over, he grabbed the bag of mulch and heaved it onto the top of the wooden pile with nary a breath.
“Uhhh...” Rainbow's jaw dropped low. Her blinking eyes followed the stallion as he carried the mass of lumber and mulch over to the checkout counter. “You... you sure you got that?”
“Eeyup.”
“Your spine isn't snapping in two or anything? Do I gotta call Nurse Redheart?”
“Heheh... eenope...”
“Hrmmphhh...” Rainbow folded her forelimbs and hovered limply after him. “Show off.”
“For real. What do you do in your spare time?” Rainbow glided alongside Big Macintosh as they trotted across the center of Ponyville. “Lift dragon eggs? Bench press mountains?”
Big Mac rolled his eyes, although he smiled. Added to the planks of wood and mulch was a pile of plates, party favors, and costumed pirate hats and eyepatches.
“You know, I always thought that your sister Applejack was suuuuper muscular. Like... for a mare, I mean. But compared to you, she's a friggin' string bean!”
“Heheheh... eeyup.”
“You're proud of that, aren't ya?” Rainbow Dash smirked.
The stallion shrugged.
“Well, I bet there's a lot of stuff that sucks about having that many muscles!”
Big Macintosh squinted at her curiously.
“Do I need to spell it out?” Rainbow giggled and pointed. “Look at you! You're as slow as a Griffon winter! I bet you couldn't outrun Tank if your life depended on it!”
The stallion sighed, looking off towards the distant horizon.
“I'm totally right, am I?” Rainbow grinned, winking. “I bet I could beat you in any race at any length and at any time! You wanna have a go? Huh?”
“Eenope.”
“Pfft. You're right.” Rainbow rubbed her chin. “There'd be no challenge in it. For me, at least. I'd just own you.”
Big Mac's lips curved.
“Did I ever tell you that I totally beat your sister at hoof-wrestling? Wait... oh yeah...” Rainbow blinked. “You were there at the Iron Pony Competition.” The mare's nostrils snorted. “I swear, you could be in a room full of feathers and still they'd make more sound than you.”
“Eheheh...”
“Oooh!” Rainbow grinned, suddenly staring him down in the face. “Wanna hoof-wrestle?”
That actually stopped Big Mac in his tracks. He had to side-step in order to avoid dropping all of the planks of wood and party favors. “Uhhhh...”
“What? Don't believe me?” Rainbow flexed a forelimb. “I'm totally stronger than I look! I bet I could wrestle you into next year!”
“Eeenope.”
“What?!” Rainbow gasped as if shot in the chest with a revolver slug. She snarled. “Ohhhhh it's on! Don't give me the silent treatment! You're shivering in your horseshoes, aren't you?! That's cuz you know I've got lots that I can bring to the table!”
“... … ...” Big Macintosh raised an eyebrow.
“AAAAND when I'm done showing you who's boss, I'll tell all of Ponyville about it! Heh... that'll give you a reason to practice more!” Rainbow spat on the ground and winked. “A little competition never hurt anypony!”
“Hrmmf...” Big Macintosh cracked the joints in his thick neck, then proceeded to lay the wooden planks down, forming a tiny “table” of stacked wood.
“Oooh! You're game!” Rainbow did twin backflips. “Killer! Ahem! Prepare the record books, pal! I'm gonna school you like it's Kindergarten! Just you see!”
“Mmmmhmm... eeyup.”
“Hrnggggggh—GUAAAH!” Rainbow's voice warbled as she was flung into a soft bed of grass beside the stack of wooden planks.
Big Mac lowered his hoof, stifling a yawn. He leaned boredly on the wooden pile.
“Mmmff... guh...” Panting, sweating, Rainbow crawled her way back onto her side of the pile. “Okay... okaaaaaaay...” She gulped and glared at him. “...best out of twenty-one.”
“Mrmmmmghhh...” Big Mac rolled his eyes, sighing.
“No! For real!” Rainbow continued to pant, wiping the sweat off her brow before planting the joint of her forelimb back on top the wood pile. “Those were all warm-ups! I'm super ready this time! Let's go, big guy!”
Big Mac fought a groan. At last, he acquiesced, bringing his massive fetlock back up so that Rainbow's limb could grip it.
“On three... just like we practiced.” Rainbow smirked. “Got it?”
“Eeeeeeeeyup.”
“One... two... three—”
Big Mac lazily swung his arm to the left.
“Gaaaaaiiie!” Rainbow's voice cracked as she was yet again flung into the grassy pile. “Oof!”
The stallion leaned his freckled chin against his forelimb. His tired eyes swam to the orange horizon in the west.
“Did... d-did I say that was the real round?” Rainbow crawled back to the wooden pile, her lithe body shivering from head to tail. “I was totally joking. Now it's go time.”
“Mrmmmf...”
“What? You chicken?” Rainbow spat onto her hooves, rubbed them together, then slapped her forelimb atop the pile yet again. “Afraid I might hurt your suave and silent type reputation.”
Big Mac raised an eyebrow.
“You heard me! You're all talk... even when... er... you don't talk...” Rainbow shook her hed, red in the fuzzy-face. “YouknowwhatImean!” Slap! She planted her forelimb on the wood again. “Now wrestle!”
“Grnnghh...” Big Mac limply gripped her hoof with hers.
She tightened her muscles, licked her lips, and locked her body with his. “One... two...” Everything tensed at once. “Threeeee-eeee-rrrnnngh-gehhhh-guuuuuu-yrghhhh!” She sweated and convulsed and writhed, her temple pulsating as her mane flounced wildly above her head.
“... … ...” Big Mac stayed perfectly still.
“Come on... I got this...” Her voice cracked with higher and higher octaves. “I g-got this! I've totally... t-totally got this...!” At last, she peaked one clenched eye open. “Huh?” She spotted Big Mac's icy stone forelimb, locked in place despite all of her struggling might. “What? You... y-you're not even trying!”
“Hmmm...” The big stallion sported an even bigger smile. “Eenope.”
“That... you... it...” Rainbow flapped her wings, flying against Big Macintosh's boy in full force. “Rrrrrgh... come... on...” Her facial muscles tore as her tail twirled like an angry squirrel's. “...just... friggin'... move! Grnnnghhhh-rrughhhh!”
“Heheheheheh...” Big Mac chuckled. He closed his eyes, quietly delighting in the adorable struggle of the determined mare against his muscular leg.
Just then—out of the blue (literally)—a soft and ticklish feather brushed against the inner pit of his front limb.
“...!!!!” Big Mac's whole body jolted. “Guhhh!” WHUD! He pratfalled over the pile, spilling yellow lumber across the dirt floor. “Ooof”
“Hah!” Rainbow Dash flew in place. Several feathers along her left wing were sticking out at a noticeable length. She retracted them swiftly and shook her own hooves victoriously in midair. “I win! Rainbow Dash downs Goliath! Woooohooo!”
Big Mac frowned up at her. “Eenope.”
“What do you mean 'Eenope?' You saw it! Heck, you felt it! Nya nyaaa!” She stuck her tongue out and flew several victory laps above his orange head. “Woohooo! Rainbow Dash! Rainbow Dash! Rainbow Dash!”
“Hmmmm...” Big Mac sat back up, leaning his chin against his forelimb. A calm smile graced his lips as he waited for the mare to finish her twirling motions in the afternoon breeze.
The sun was setting by the time they reached Sweet Apple Acres.
“Whew! We made it with time to spare!” Rainbow hovered at tree-level, squinting at the burning horizon. “We should have snuck in a caber tossing contest! I bet I could have beat you three times doing that and still we would have gotten back to your place in time!”
Big Macintosh said nothing. He planted the heavy supplies down on the top of the hill, exhaling with relief. Free from the burden, he stooped down and plucked a tall blade of grass from the field. Sticking the blade between his teeth, he sat down in a lazy slump and exhaled calmly, gazing at the lines and lines of orchards with tranquil green eyes.
FWOOSH! Rainbow Dash landed right beside him, blowing aside weeds and flower petals before plopping her tiny rump down. “Whew! All in a day's work, eh, big guy?” She nudged him.
“Mmmm...” He re-positioned the blade of grass in his mouth in order to afford a hearty “Eeyup.”
“It's a good thing you had me along to lend a hoof.”
Big Mac gave her a sideways glance. There was no subtle glint to his eyes.
“Cuz... y'know... you woulda been soooooo bored without me that you would have fallen asleep on the job.”
“Heheh...” Big Mac stared out across the fields once again.
“For real, though.” Rainbow Dash tapped his forelimbs. “Those are some strong shoulders you've go there, buddy. You should show off some more.”
Big Mac was silent.
“Like... go out and... I dunno... build bridges. Toss rocks. Beat up dragons—but only the ones who deserve it, of course.” Rainbow sighed as her wings drooped. “Otherwise Spike and Twilight would not let you hear any end of it.”
The stallion slowly nodded.
“I mean it. It's gotta be pretty awesome to be that strong, to not have to be afraid of nothing. I mean... I-I'm not afraid of anything! Pffft...” Rainbow folded her forelimbs as she closed her eyes with an indignant snort. “I've kicked dragons in the face myself, y'know! Has anypony ever told you that?”
“Mmmm... eeyup.”
“I've done sonic rainbooms... faced nightmare alicorns and chaos lords... you name it. It's been written—then it's been done. By me! Erm... the doing, not the writing. Writing's for eggheads like Twilight and Spike.”
Big Macintosh quietly listened.
“Twilight and Spike...” Rainbow's voice continued, though it was a few decibels lower this time and decidedly muddled. “...who... who aren't really strong at all, y'know. Same can be said about Rarity and Pinkie Pie. Fluttershy—by a long shot. Applejack? Pfft... we all know she's got guts. Plus, she's your sister. She's got you around—so of course she's got her back covered.”
Silence.
“It's easy being strong,” Rainbow muttered. “But... but sometimes I think... it's k-kinda hard being strong for everypony. Cuz I've got so many friends, y'know? At least... erm... a lot more than I used to.”
Big Mac blinked. A gust of wind blew at the two of them. Somepony trembled, though nothing was said of it.
At last, Rainbow spoke again. “You must be really used to juggling everything here at the farm. I mean... apples aside... Granny Smith? Applejack? Apple Bloom? It can't be easy looking after all of them at once. But... but you do that, don't you? I mean... eheheh... of course you would. But I wonder if it ever gets hard.”
The stallion's eyes fell towards the trees. In the setting sun, they were starting to lose their luster. A cold shudder ran through his heavy lungs.
“It... it's okay if it gets hard, y'know? So long as you always stick to what you do. At least, that's what I think,” Rainbow said. “If something nasty gets in the way of me and my friends? WHAMMMO!” She punched one hoof against the other. “I'll teach it right—Owie!” She winced, shaking her hoof before giving it a little lick. “Erm... you d-didn't see that.”
“Hmmm...” Big Mac smiled for the first time in minutes. “Eenope.”
Rainbow Dash fidgeted... then she fidgeted some more. It was starting to cross over from “noticeable” to “glaring.” Still, Big Mac said nothing. He simply waited until it was her turn to speak again.
And speak, she did.
“You... uh... you really really don't talk about much, do you?”
Big Macintosh was incredibly used to shrugging by now. So, this time, he didn't. And, this time, Rainbow didn't seem to care.
“Is it because you've got nothing to say or you just don't care for it?”
More silence.
“Then... uhm... I-I guess it's almost as if I was never here... huh?”
Big Macintosh paused in breathing. He wasn't certain why, but he felt his insides freezing up, as if someone had injected ice into his bloodstream. Navigating his way across those frosty waters, he nevertheless found the courage to mutter: “Eenope.”
The silence that followed then was just as uneventful as before. Still, Big Macintosh held his breath. He didn't know for how long... until it happened on its own. She happened on her own.
At first, it felt like a little ragdoll was sliding up against him, but Big Mac didn't know of any dolls with hair that silky-smooth, and with limbs that petite and precious, and with a quivering breath that fragile yet ardent to maintain an air of strength and bravado. But as soon as he breathed, he felt a timid response from the petite pegasus beside him. Rainbow Dash shuddered briefly, but upon realizing that Big Mac didn't stop being the mountain of muscle that he was, she continued leaning against him. For the first time that day—or in all the days that Big Mac had known her—she was perfectly still... perfectly quiet. The stallion didn't realize she was even capable of that, and it occurred to him that perhaps she didn't know either.
“You... y-you didn't see this either,” a timid voice wafted through the crimson clouds. “Okay...?”
Big Mac said nothing. He simply waited... waited...
“Unless...” An audible ulp adorably adorned the airwaves between them. “Unless you want to remember it... of c-course.” Another tiny shudder. “Cuz... c-cuz that'd be awesome as well, I guess...”
Big Mac smiled. Without hesitation, he brought a mighty hoof around and held the tiny athlete towards him. Rainbow instantly trembled, nuzzling her cheek against him as her eyes closed. She didn't have to fly anywhere, go anywhere, or save anypony. She simply surrendered to his gentle, squeezing embrace, allowing the moment to flow through her, like feathers drifting slowly to a dusty floor.
“Squeak a single word of this,” she muttered in an attempt to sound threatening. “And I'll kick your teeth in.” It came out as a foalish whimper.
He heard it, and he smiled. “Eenope.”
She didn't have anything else left to say. Big Mac gazed at the sunset, holding her for several minutes... or maybe for several hours... or maybe he just couldn't remember.
