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                  The Arrival of a Brony                   
                    -by Thebronywithin-                    
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                         Arrival                           
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Arrival
Another day, another boring day.
My life has a usual schedule for a fifteen year old, Wake up, early morning seminary, back to bed, back up, get dressed for school, go to school, talk with friends, finish school, come home, eat, free time, bed.
I feel as though I am part of a bigger picture, as though I’m just a pixel on an iPhone screen, unseen, but necessary.
The things I would do in my free time usually include, watching MLP:FIM, looking at art, writing Fanfics that are total crap, and listen to music, to name a few.
I don’t know how, but the other day, as I sat at my piano, a cool black Yamaha Clavinova electric Grand piano, I felt as if I didn’t belong in my world, almost like Lyra in Jason The Human’s story ‘Anthropology’, I found my self thinking.
‘I Just want to spread my wings and fly!’
But that’s a crazy thought, humans can’t fly under their own power.
So, I sit here in my room, a unique but not odd shaped room, from the door comes one wall parallel, and another one perpendicular, all shaping up to a square room, with the exception of my closet, and a cut out space for my dresser across from my bed.
The walls are blue on three sides, and orange on the other, interesting, I chose those colors before I found my Favorite hockey team, OILERS Fan at heart I guess.
Now, as I lay my head down, thoughts drift through my head.
‘What if I were teleported to Equestria?’
‘Would I remain human, or become a pony?’
‘If I did go, I would prefer to stay human, but, if I had to become a pony, I would choose to become a Pegasus, they are the coolest, but mostly, I’d like to become a Pegasus to hang out with Rainbow Dash, the fastest flier in equestria!’
By this point my thoughts started to drift, and eventually after about twenty minutes of thinking, the last thought that went through my mind was.
‘I bet apple stock would go up if they put the original version of ‘The Last Roundup’ on iTunes’
After thinking back to what I was originally thinking about, and realizing I was now on a differently similar topic, I decided it was best to ‘try’ and get to sleep.  
I pull my dog, Doodle, funny story as to the reason for his name, my brother was eight when he named him, I guess his breed was the reason for the name, a “Schnoddle” as their called, he was about nine, maybe ten at this point, his hair was a dark Carmel color, but it’s lightened up with age.
I am somehow managing to fall asleep, like many people, I don’t fall asleep very easily, a half hour to two hours is needed for me to finally fall asleep from the time I go to bed.
As I drift off to sleep on my twin size bed with blue sheets and blankets, the world seems to fade away all at once, and just like that, I’m asleep.
--
Morning comes, I check my clock, 7:30am, as I start to get out of bed, I begin to realize something.
“Hold on, Mom would never let me sleep past seminary unless there was a good reason, like I was sick, or I had a Final exam to write.” I say out loud.
I check the clock on my white iPhone 4S, with a Vinyl Scratch Background.  
Same time 7:30.
I check my white iPad 2, same story, I go to check my laptop, which I brought into my room for charging that night, same story.
Every device I have says 7:30, well, 7:31 now, but then, another thing catches my attention, my phone has no service, and my iPad and MacBook have no Wi-Fi.
“What the BUCK is going on here?” I say in frustration.
“Maybe the power went out, maybe there’s a problem with the towers, or maybe…” I pause at the last phrase, as I go to my curtain, push the blue divider curtain to the left, and pull the string on the brown Blinds to open them, and what I see next is a total surprise.
“WOAH!” I say as a flash of white comes from my window.
“Is it still winter here?” I say out-loud.
As I look around, I see something I never expected to see, a Hockey Arena, but it wasn’t the arena that was so unexpected, it was the fact that it was practically abandoned.  
It was well maintained, but it showed that there hand’t been a team there for some time.
The only words that really remained on the building were “Ponyville Pond”.
“Ha, funny brain, now wake up for real” I say as I go to pick up one of my NERF guns, my Recon CS-6 that I painted black.  
With none of the attachments on it, save the clip, it was a relatively small NERF gun, and I preferred it like that.
I notice that it’s cocked, I aim it at the grey carpeted ground and pull the trigger, sure enough, an orange Streamline dart shoot’s out of the small pistol, I then cock the gun half way, push the clip release, and check to see if any darts are left, sure enough, there are five remaining.
“If this doesn’t hurt, I’m dreaming, if I wake up when I pull the trigger, than I’m Currently dreaming, if I feel the dart, I’m awake.” I say out loud as I point the pistol at my temple.
“Three, Two, One.” I count down, and on ‘One’ I pull the trigger.
“Gah, that hurt!” I say, then, moments later, I realize the Gravity of my situation.
“I’m in equestria, okay, every Brony’s dream, I’m still human, my dream, and all my electronics are hear, well, I wonder if Dub-step exists here, if not, I’ve got a good library of music that will knock their socks off!” I say as I start to get lost in thought, then, one thing sticks in my mind. “How did I get here?”
I decide the best thing to do is to put on a clean pair of pants, a new shirt, and try to make some friends, well, if my information’s correct, there will be one who will be easy to become friends with, but the rest of the town, let’s just say, Zecora, and leave it at that.
As I finish putting on my clothes, I look at what I’m wearing, as it will have an impact on my first impression.
Okay, Black socks, check, blue Jeans, check, T-shirt, check, and hoodie, check.
My shirt is a simple red, long sleeve shirt, with the word “CANADA” written on it out of the signatures of the mens and women's 2010 Olympic Hockey teams on the front.
My Hoodie was navy blue, and had the word “NIKE” written on the front in white letters.
My jeans were simple, blue denim.
My socks were made of Cotten, and were black.
Then, out of the corner of my eye, I saw my shoes, weird, my shoes were never in my room, but, I suppose the fact that I’m in Equestria allows for some other inexplicable events to tie in.
I put my Grey and green NIKE shoes on, with the NIKE + iPod sensor still in it, then I see another unexpected anomaly, my Hockey gear, it’s not much, just some street hockey goalie pads, a white, SHER-WOOD ice hockey goalie stick, a Regular gray ice hockey stick, made by EASTON, some black Bauer Skates with white laces, and a dark blue Bauer Helmet.
On the equipment bag, where my blue street hockey pads were stored, was a note, Dear Sweet Celestia a note!
I pick it up and begin to read it.
Dear Thebronywithin, DJ Buzz, Leg0ipodtouch, Dallin, or what ever name you prefer to be called by.
It fills me with great joy and sorrow to have you to our world.
The world you lived in is now unattainable, I tried to send you back, but was only able to bring items form your world, hence why your hockey equipment and shoes are here.
I wish to inform you that, due to your apparent abilities, which I can only guess the existence of, based off your possessions, you will help to restart the hockey franchise in Ponyville.
Unfortunately, five seasons ago, the Golden Leafs had very little support, and the team was moved, they are now the Trottingham Golden Leafs, and I wish for Hockey to again be part of the lives of the Ponyvillians, you will help.
When the team moved, the players didn’t want to play for another city, so they quit the league, now, they wish they hand’t, because they no longer have games to look forward to, learn from, and grow from.
I wish for you to restart the Ponyville Hockey franchise with a team with your choice of name, logo, and official colors.
I hope you make some friends.
Your first friend in this new world
Princess Celestia.
“Wow, this is kind of crazy!” I mutter.
“First I find out that Equestria is real, then, I find out that the Fanfiction “Equestria Hockey League” by XFizzle, has at least some ground in the real Equestria, Then I find out that I have to RESTART the Ponyville Hockey Franchise? Holy Deity!” I say to no one in particular.
Then, A knock on the door.
As I make my way to my closed bedroom door, I stop short, and say.
“Who is it?”
No response.
“Hello? You knocked on my door, you could at least tell my your name!” I say in an upbeat tone, trying not to scare them off.
Still nothing.
“I’ll start, my name is Dallin Butts, but you can call me DJ, Buzz, or DJ Buzz.” I say out to them.
Nothing again.
“If you don’t tell me your name, I won’t open the door.” I say, hoping to catch their attention.
All of a sudden, a large number of voices come from outside the door, I look out my window, nothing, just white snow.
As the voices continued, I hear a voice, a very recognizable voice, it’s louder than the rest of the voices I hear.
“Quiet down! If one of us doesn’t say our names, then he, she, it, whatever, won’t open the door! Now let me handle this!” The voice says, just then, all the other voices Quiet down.
I hear steps coming towards my door, and the same voice says through the door.
“Hello, um, Dallin, was it?”
“Yes.”
  
“Hello Dallin, my name is Twilight Sparkle, a resident here in ponyville!” The now Identified voice says. “Now could you hold up your end of the deal and open up the door, please?”
“Okay” Not phased by the fact that I was talking to a pony, all the shock of the world was gone, replaced with pure Brony excitement.
As I open the door, I get the expected reaction, a large collective “GASP!” and I swear, at least one pony actually said “Gasp!”.
But one pony, a mint green colored pony with a slightly lighter mane, and a white streak through it, and a lyre on her flank, was just standing in pure awe.
For a moment, I can take in the sight of my new home, the ground is covered in snow, the buildings are all sand colored, with wood along the sides of some parts in a boxed “X” pattern for strength, the roofs are covered in snow, but I can see some hay poking out from under it.
The very pony who told me her name, had a purple color to her, a dark purple mane, with two side by side streaks of lighter shades of purple, and six stars on her flank, a big purple one, slightly lighter than her fur, and five smaller white stars surrounding it.
“What’s with the sudden quietness, you were all anxious a minuet ago!” an out-of-view voice says. “What is it, Princess Celestia's brother? Oh, my…” the owner of the voice says as she comes into view, she has cyan blue fur, a rainbow mane and tail, wings, and a cloud with a rainbow lightning bolt coming from the cloud on her flank, just as she finishes speaking, she sees me.
Dead silence
“Hello, I mean you no harm, and hope to make friends with some of you!” I say, trying to break the silence.
“To earn our trust, so that you can EAT us?” A southern sounding voice says.
“No, I would never eat a pony, the very thought of that makes me sick to my stomach, no, the only reason I want to make friends is because I want to BE friendly.” I respond, hoping to dash any fears they had of me.
“Hey, I have a question for you!” The Rainbow Maned Pegasus says to me.
“Go ahead.” I say, welcoming the question.
“Just what DO you eat?” Was the question, the very question I had prepared to break slowly to one pony at a time, and incase of emergency, hide details incase of a mass gathering like this.
I generally like steak, chicken, Hamburgers, Bacon, Hot Dogs, but none of those would go over well with the crowd, so, I improvise.
“Well, I like noodles, peanut butter, honey, bread, Cucumbers, Pears, Oranges, Bananas, lettuce, Spinach, and apples, I LOVE apples!” I wasn’t really lying, I did like all those things, and I put emphasis on the word ‘APPLES’ in hopes to win over a certain Earth Pony.
“Well, why didn’t you say so! We got loads of apples! Come on down to mah farm and you can try some!” The same southern voice from earlier says, as the owner of this voice walks up to me, with a big grin on her face.
‘I know all of their names, but it would be creepy if an ‘alien’ knew your name without you telling them, I’d be scared out of my wits if that happened.’ I think to myself. ‘I must treat this like I don’t know who these ponies are!’
“Hello, I don’t believe we’ve met, what’s your name?” I ask.
“Oh, forgive me for not properly introducing mahslef, The names Applejack, it’s nice to meet someone who likes apples, ah grow apples if you haven’t heard.” She says to me, she’s got orange fur, with a blond mane and tail, tied into a pony tail, ha, PONY tail. (BA DUM TIS!), and an image of three apples on her flank.
“It’s a pleasure to meet you Applejack, my name is Dallin, but most people don’t remember my name, or just pronounce it wrong, so, you can call mr DJ.” I Respond casually.
“My my, and modest too!” a voice of unidentifiable origin says, as the pony the voice is associated with comes out from behind Twilight, the new pony is white, with a royal purple curled mane and tail, and three diamonds on her flank.
“...and you might be?” I inquire of the new pony.
“Oh, do forgive me for the lousy introduction, my name is Rarity, and I must say, you look good in those clothes!” Rarity say to me. “but I’m sure I could make you FABULOUS!”
“Thank you, but their nothing special, just casual, everyday clothes.” I respond, hoping to keep her from examining my clothes in fine detail, while I’m still wearing them.
“You mean to say that you dress like this every day?” Rarity chimes, seemingly surprised that your clothes are not for special occasions.
“Yep, more or less, I have different shirts so it doesn’t get plain.” I say, hoping to change topics.
“Well, I guess that makes sense, but, every day? *Mumble*” Rarity starts to mumble to herself in a seemingly confused daze.
I start to wonder if I should console the poor mare, but before I can, Twilight begins talking to me.
“Well, I just have one simple question for you!” Twilight remarks. “How did you get here?”
“I don’t know”
“You don’t know?” She says. “are you sure?”
“I’m positive, don’t you think I would tell you if I knew?  
But, there is something you may want to know, your Princess sent me a letter.” I mention to her, and with the last comment, she’s up in my face.
“Are you serious! That’s no small matter! I must know what she said!” Twilight pushed.
“HOLD ON, let me get it” I say as I push the mare out of my face, and walk into my room to get the letter.
“Here.” I say as I hand the letter off to her.
As she reads it, the only response I get is.
“Holy Celestia, she was bucking serious!”

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                Doors open from both sides                 
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Doors open from both sides
“What do you mean, ‘She was Serious’?” I ask with a look of Bewilderment on my face.
“Well, about a week ago, I got a letter from the princess, stating that she wanted us to start a new hockey team, but I never thought she was serious!” Twilight responds, with a look of confusion and concern on her face, at least from what I can tell, it’s a pony after all.
“Wait, wouldn't your Princess only send you something if she meant what she was saying?” I raise my eyebrow in accusation and uncertainty.
“Well, she kind of has a reputation for pulling a few tricks here and there, and this seemed to ridiculous to be true, but the letter she gave you only proves that she wasn’t joking!”
Great, fanfictions have ground here, AND Trollestia, what’s next?
“BARK!” a noise from behind calls.
I turn around and open my arms as I call out “Doodle! Come here boy!” shortly after Doodle comes running out into my open arms.
“Everyone, this is my dog, Doodle!” I show him to everypony, hoping to make it more clear that I mean no harm.
Just then, I see a yellow and purple blur darts out of the crowd, and stop right in front of me, it was Fluttershy, but best to keep my knowledge of them hidden, like I told myself earlier, but before I can say anything, she starts to speak.
“Oh, he’s so cute! I’ve never seen a dog as adorable as this one!” She says in her ‘soft but normal’ voice. “I mean, I’ve seen animals cuter than this, but not a dog that’s cuter than yours!”
“yeah, that’s what we thought when we got him” I reply to her comments. “his ‘cuteness’ is why we got him!”
“Aw, thats so adorable! how old is he? he can’t be more than a couple of years old!” Fluttershy continues. “I mean, he’s so small and energetic!”
“He’s about ten years old” I reply casually, not expecting much of a crowd reaction, which I got anyway.
“HE’S TEN YEARS OLD!?” Twilight is freaking out right now, I can tell, her hair’s starting to fray, and that’s never a good sign.
“Yeah, is that a problem?” I inquire with genuine interest.
“well, I, um, maybe, hmmm” Twi seems lost in thought, like I just put a puzzle in front of her that she needs to figure out to continue with life, at the same time, causing her a bit of embarrassment.
“Why is it such a shock that he’s ten years old?” I’m past curious, I’m borderline confused.
“Well, most dogs with that much energy are very young, when he came running out, we all assumed he was a lot younger than he was!” Fluttershy interjects.
“Never assume, it usually ends bad.” now I’m being funny, I just have the best smirk on my face as I say those words.
“You know that turtles and tortoises are known for being slow, right?” I ask, trying to play on my ‘assumptions’ comment a bit.
“well yeah, they do EVERYTHING slow!” Rainbow Dash says down to me, hovering above her friends.
“Not true, they are very fast swimmers, they can swim up to 12m/hr or 20k/hr.” I’m still being funny, but I am also giving them information. “another example of things you assume, but aren’t true.”
“W-What?” I’ve done something really funny now, I’ve confused Twilight, I bet that’s a first. “H-How could you, where did, why are you able to give such exact measurements of speed?”
That wasn’t what I thought she was confused about, but it’s funny to me all the same.
“What, it’s not like thats common knowledge or anything, but a lot of information is available on the internet” I say blankly, knowing that I’m going to be bombarded with questions.
“Wait, what’s ‘the internet’?”Everyponys favorite egghead asks with genuine interest in her voice.
“The internet, trying to explain that is like explaining how speakers work, its possible, just bloody difficult.” We all know this, the internet is made up of over a million websites with more being added everyday. “The internet is for one, a source of information, with databanks that if it were printed, could fit thousands of libraries, and then there’s the entertainment, things like music, movies, and art are also very prominent on the internet, I could go on, but I’ve covered all that needs to be covered, the rest is, stuff you don’t need to know.”
“That’s just.” I think I broke Twilight with the amount of information I said was available. “wow”
The ponies who had gathered around my room were starting to leave to do the various things they had on their plates for the day, only a few stayed behind.
“Yeah, and its all easy to find as well” Now I’m just teasing her, we’ve all seen the show, she’s always unable to find SOMETHING in her library. “no fumbling around with books, sections, or chapters, just straight to what you need.”
“H-how does that work?” Twilight’s starting to get curious, good, it means she wont be going crazy.
“Oh, it’s simple really, you just enter in what you want to search, for example, lyrics to a song you heard at the club last night, and it’ll find the song you’re looking for, I don’t know HOW it works, I just know that it DOES.” Satisfied with my description of google search, I turn to Twilight to see her reaction.
“What?”
“Just forget it, it’s the magic of technology that makes it possible, just leave it at that” Honestly, after my description she DIDN’T get it? Oh well, I guess I suck at describing the internet.
“You said entertainment, I know what music and art are, but what’s a ‘Movie’?” Rainbow Dash inquires of me with a look of confusion and curiousness on her face.
“You know what a picture is, right?”
“Um, yeah, but what does that have to of with a movie?” Rainbow is getting impatient, like thats not old news, but still.
“Well, a movie is a large series of pictures put together to make one moving image, often put to sound, gimme a sec.”I walk back into my room to get my laptop, my dog still in my arms.
I come back out, dog in one arm, laptop in the other.
“Could you hold him for a moment please Twilight?” I ask to her, hoping to free my arms so I can use my laptop properly.
“uh, sure.” She takes him in one hoof, holding him like a baby, the way I was holding him. “like this?”
“That’s perfect, now, movie” I open my laptop and the screen comes to life, thank celestia it was set to my fullscreen’d iTunes, the Rainbow Dash background and Vinyl Scratch folder icon would’ve been hard to explain, I go into my movies, and select “Star Trek (2009)” and hit “Play”.
“this, is a movie” I only show a few scenes, not wanting them to think humans are all war bend madmen, I stop it and ask them. “So, what do you think of movies?”
Because it was an action movie, Rainbow was the first to respond. “That was awesome! first they were like ‘Whats that’ then they’re like ‘Evasive action’ and the ‘pew pew pew’ and that guy getting sucked into space!! Holy cow that was amazing!!”
“And you somehow had a Pinkie moment, did you even breath in the last minute?” Rarity chimes in, who had been there too, Fluttershy just hid, Twilight could only stare in awe at the video, while Rainbow was soaking in the action, and Rarity could only talk about what they were wearing.
“Did somepony say my name?!?” an extremely sugar-high sounding voice says from behind me. “hey, Mr.Alien dude, why did you land your spaceship in the middle of the street? it makes no sense, you’re out in the open! or maybe you’re a peaceful alien who only wants to be friends, or maybe you are a spy alien, gathering intelligence for an alien zombie apocalypse! or mmph” she was silenced by Twilight.
“Do forgive her, she’s just had too many cupcakes I think” Twilight says to me, trying to make it seem like Pinkie wasn’t always this way, which I knew wasn’t true.
“its okay, I like it when people can talk without needing to breathe, I can only do it for so long, then I need to take a breath, but, I’m not impressing anyone, so it doesn’t really matter.” I say trying to contain the situation.
“See, he doesn’t mind!”
“She’s in my bedroom, isn’t she.”
“Yep, she is.” Rainbow says blankly.
“wow, it is MESSY in here, how can you fly this thing when it’s so messy?” Pinkie asks, probably in a curious mood, which is good, I can focus on one Pinkie question at a time.
“You know it’s not a spaceship, it’s me bedroom.” Nice me, that just makes it SO much easier, doesn’t it.
“Really? Wow, this is messier than Dashies cloud home, and thats saying something!” Well, Pinkie just made this funny, as she does.
*Snicker* All the ponies EXEPT for Rainbow Dash start snickering at her, and so do I, even Twilight found it amusing.
“Aw come on, it’s not THAT Messy!” Rainbow Dash complains, clearly irritated by the humor being directed AT her.
“Pinkie, why don’t you come out of his bedroom? I don’t know about you, but I wound’t want anypony snooping around in my sleeping chambers” Rarity calls to Pinkie, who’s still in my bedroom.
“nah, it’s all good, everything is on the floor, so I’m not really hiding anything.” I Reply, making myself seem even more peaceful and kind.
Pinkie is now floating out of my room with a purple aura around her, I look over to Twilight, her horn is glowing with the same aura pinkie is, showing that she’s the one responsible for the Pink ball of cotton candy and parties floating out of my room.  
I decide to play up the “of another world” even more.
“What in the, how are, why can you do that?” that worked.
“What do you mean, all unicorns can do magic, don’t you have unicorns where you come from?” Twilight inquires of me, with pure confusion in her voice and on her face.
“No, neither do we have Pegasi, they’re pure mythology where I come from.” I say in response to her question.
“Fascinating.” Twilight says to me with a look on her face that is a combination of deep thought, and confidence.
“Why is it fascinating?” I ask.
“Because humans are considered mythology here” A new voice from beside me says.
“Oh, hello, didn’t see you there mis?” I ask, pausing at the last word showing that I’m asking her name.
“Lyra, Lyra Heartstrings” She replies. “Pleased to meet you” She extends her right hoof.
“DJ Buzz, pleased to meet you to.” I reach out and grab her extended hoof, and shake it up and down lightly, then release my grip and put my hand at my side.
“So Twilight, I don’t understand something.” I say, trying to get back on track with Twi.
“What is that?”
“Well, I came here, obviously through some type of magical rift, creating a door into your world.”
“Right”
“Well, why can’t I be sent back, because it created a door to your world, and doors open from both sides.”

//-------------------------------------------------------//
                       Wild Signals                        
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Wild Signals
“Yeah, thats right, Twi, get ready to work your magic!” Rainbow Dash says shortly before flying off in the other direction, then zooms towards me.
“Crap”
“Rainbow WAIT!!” Twilight tries to stop Rainbow Dash but it’s too late, she’s just drop kicked me into my room and slammed the door, I can hear Rainbow say something, but with landing on my NERF Longshot, and banging the back of my head against the wall, I could’t quite make it out, but if I had to guess, I’d say she was telling Twilight to send me back before I ran out and killed her.
I see a flash of light outside my window, and all of a sudden, my iPad, the only device I left plugged in, makes the whistling/dinging noise that all iPhones, iPads, and iPod touches do when they’re plugged in.
“Well, that was a short visit” I get up and go over to my window to inspect the area, but, to my surprise, I still see Ponyville Pond just outside my window.  
I go back over to my iPad, sure enough, it was receiving power, and even had a Wi-Fi connection.
“Beyond weird, not that I mind, but it’s still weird, what about my phone?” I take my iPhone out of my pocket, and sure enough, I have four bars of Telus 3G, and Wi-Fi.
“That makes as much sense as my whole situation, but at least I’ll be able to show Twilight the internet!” I then have a sudden realization. “Then again, that might not be the best idea.”
I decide to go over and open my door, after all, there are probably a few confused ponies on the other side.  
I grasp the handle and turn the knob, unlatching the door from the wall, allowing it to swing open, and when it is fully open, I hear Rainbow Dash say.
“Run! He’s gonna kill me for assaulting him!”
I really need to get a handle on this situation before I become an outcast without doing anything, I decide not being hostile is a good start.
“Next time you could ask, and I’ll gladly just walk in, no need to break my ribcage.”
Twilight comes up to me, but not before whacking RD upside the head, and says.
“I’m sorry about Rainbow Dash, she can be, quick to do, slow to think.” She says trying to make me less judgmental, I know, because I’ve had people try to do the same thing, not realizing my standpoint on the subject or person already.
“It’s alright, I can be the same way at times.” I shrug, not much else to do in this situation.
“So, you’re not mad?” Rainbow Dash comes out and asks, hoping I’m, well, not angry with her.
“Nah, I’m pissed, but violence won’t solve anything, so why bother.” I hope that’s enough to keep them from running away, if not, I’m screwed.
Applejack lightly slugs Rainbow Dash on the shoulder, as if to tell her to do something.
“Uh, sorry for kicking you like that, I was kind of skeptical about you, I really just wanted to keep my friends safe, and to me you seemed like you could be a threat.” Rainbow apologizes to me in this manner, and I can tell it’s only half sincere at best, but, oh well.
“So, what, did you think I was a spy or something?”
“Yeah I, wait, how did you know that?” Rainbow Dash is a bit puzzled as to how I was able to “guess” her assumptions.
“Well, based of the things you said” and my knowledge of My Little Pony “I was able to make an educated guess.”
“Oh, okay, I guess that makes sense.” She says, probably not convinced, but whatever, it’s Rainbow Dash.
I look down for a moment and see my laptop on the ground, with a few new dents in the aluminum enclosure.
“Well, thats just great.” I reach down and pick it up, examining it, there’s a dent on front right corner, near the Facetime camera.
“Well, maybe the damage is all aesthetic.” I open the laptop up, and to my relief, the display and trackpad are un-cracked, and the keyboard is fine.
“MacBook Air, thin, light, and durable!” I now realize that the ponies I was talking with are staring at me. “What?”
“Well, you seemed so concerned over a small item like that, we’re just trying to figure out why.” Twilight seems to be speaking for the group, which currently consists of her, Rarity, Fluttershy, Rainbow Dash, Applejack, Pinkie Pie, and Lyra.
“Well, yeah, this isn’t exactly cheap, this particular model costs about one thousand, five hundred.”
“HOLY CHEESE AND COW PIES!!” Applejack spurs out, while all the other ponies just stand and stare wide eyed at me.
“Did it really cost that much? Thats quite a lot of bits for something so small.” Once again, I’ve made Twilight curious, this should be easy, just show her what it’s capable of.
“Well, yeah, but it’s dollars, not bits, and its well worth the price, because, One, it’s durable, as you know from earlier, and two, it’s capable of so much, that it can replace many things you probably have lying around the house, like, a projector, for instance.” I seem to have hit home with this one, Twilight is beginning to understand why it costs such a pretty penny for the “Small device”.
“Ah have a question.” Applejack adds, and I bet I know what the question is.
“Go ahead.”
“Why is there a glowin’ apple on the back?” Yep, I was right.
“Oh, well, thats the company that makes it, Apple inc.” I say matter-of-factly. “They used to be called Apple Computer inc. but they made so many things other than computers, that they dropped the ‘Computer’ part of their name.”
“And just what IS a computer?” Rainbow Dash asks, she seems annoyed, thats new (Not at all).
“That would be what this is.” I point to the open laptop in my hands.
“Oh, okay.”
“Yeah, anyway, I’m gonna put this back in my room now.” I walk back into my room and put my laptop on my bed, and walk back out.
“That was quick.” Twilight says as I walk back out.
“What can I say, it doesn’t take long to walk in, set something down, and walk out.”
“Well, I guess that makes sense.” She replies, just as a small purple and green dragon comes running up.
“Twilight!” He says. “There you are! Ther-… who’s this?” He points to me.
“Spike, this is Dallin, Dallin, this is Spike.” Twilight introduces us to each other, and I kneel down on one knee to greet him.
“Hello, Spike, it’s nice to meet you.” I extend my hand to him, which he looks at for a moment, then takes it in his claw and shakes.
“Nice to meet you too, Dallin.” Spike says to me as he pulls his hand away.
“Anyway, Twilight, there’s some weird metal carriage-like objects outside the library”
“What? Metal, carriage-like objects? What exactly does that mean Spike?” Twilight asks him.
“Well, they look like enclosed carriages, although one is big and silver, while the other is smaller and orange.” Spike explains. “But neither of them have a way to connect to a pony to tow it!”
“Well that just doesn’t make any-” Twilight is cut of by me saying.
“Wait a minute, I know what those are, I think.” I say. “ could you take me to them?”
“Well, yeah, but, why?” Spike seems perplexed by my request.
“Just trust me.” I tell Spike. “oh, and Twilight, you can put Doodle down now.”
“Oh, okay.” Twilight does her best to set my dog down without hurting him, but Doodle twists and turns and eventually ends up on the ground. “Omygosh, I’m so sorry!”
“Nah, don’t worry about it, he does that, it’s not your fault.” It’s true, Doodle is a jerk when it comes to being put down, on the ground I mean.
“Anyway, let’s go, lead the way, Spike!”
“Uh,” He glances over to Twilight who just gives a shrug. “Okay.”
“Come on Doodle, let’s go!” I say in a higher pitch voice, as if I were talking to a baby, and begin walking, following Spikes lead, with Doodle walking along side me.
“You really think you know what these things are? Spike wasn’t very descriptive.” Twilight seems unconvinced that I know what the “Carriage like” objects outside her house are.
“If I’m right, they’d be from my world, and Spikes description was adequate, providing I actually know what they are.”
“Alright, if you say so”
The rest of the journey to the library was filled with an awkward silence, with the exception of the light patting of Rainbow Dash’s wings, and the hoof clops of the other six ponies (Twilight, Rarity, Lyra, Fluttershy, Applejack, and Pinkie Pie).
“Alright, it’s just up here, but they’re around back, so you won’t see them ‘till we’ve made our way around the Library.” Spike breaks the silence, probably sensing the awkward situation.
“Alright, that’s cool.” Then I see the Library, it’s bigger than I thought, however, since about four months after first watching the show, I’ve had a comment on my mind that I Never thought I’d get to say, here goes nothing. “you know, when your parents tell you to make a treehouse, they didn’t mean literally make a house out of the tree!”
My comments get audible response, laughter, just about everypony at least has a smile on their face, all except for Twilight, who seem’s slightly offended.
“Yeah, why is the library made out of a hollowed out tree?” Spike adds.
“I don’t know, it was like that before we came!” Twilight’s being defensive, time to ease off.
“Relax cupcake, it was a joke.”
“Cupcake?” Twilight seems confused by my choice of words.
“Yeah, cupcake, a miniature version of a cake, commonly used at birthday parties.”
“PARTY!? OMYGOSH! I TOTALLY FORGOT!! YOU’RE NEW, AND I HAVEN’T THROWN YOU A PARTY YET!” Pinkie Pie then zooms away, leaving me and the rest of the ponies in her dust, which is pink for some explainable reason, it’s Pinkie Pie.
“I’m no expert, but given what she said, am I to assume that she’s throwing me a party?” I’m a bit bemused, even though I expected as much from Pinkie, seeing it in real life is just, weird.
“Yeah, you get used to it after a while, but at first, it’d freak anypony out.” Applejack chimes in, she’s probably seen this a thousand times, and yet, she’s not completely annoyed by it, or if she is, she does a really good job of hiding it.
“Curious” I add. “because I’m not a pony.”
“Guys, are you gonna come and see, or just stand here and talk?” Gees, spike’s almost as impatient as Rainbow Dash, almost.
“Alright, we’re coming, sheesh, who crapped in your cornflakes this morning?” That turned a few heads.
“What’s that supposed to mean?” Spike’s pissed, probably not a good thing.
“Relax, it’s an expression, it means, why are you so grumpy?” I state, trying to get a handle on the situation, this really isn’t going as smooth as I envisioned before arriving in equestria.
“Well, you could’ve said that.” Spike replies, still upset.
“You know what, forget I said anything, let’s just see if I was right about these ‘Carriage like objects’ okay?” Why am I always trying to re-obtain control of the situation?
“Humph, fine, they’re just around the Library.” Spike grumbles, he’s probably upset about what I said.
“Alright then, let’s head over there.”
We walk around to the back of the library, and my eyes light up, the ponies just stare in confusion, but then again, they don’t know what they are.
One has four doors, is a bit smaller than my bedroom, and is colored silver, with a logo on the front, the logo is a simple three elongated triangles that meet in the middle, and have a circle surrounding them, touching the tip of each triangle.
The other has two doors, is a fair bit smaller than my room, about the size of a queen or king size bed, and is colored orange, and has a logo at the front as well, however, the logo is a triangle that bulges slightly on each line, is filled with black, has a gold/orange outline, and has a bull of the same color, seeming to be turning left while charging, and the word “Lamborghini” overtop of the bull.
“See” Spike says as he walks over to the SUV. “no place to hook in a pony to pull it!”
“I see, Buzz, can I call you Buzz? Do you recognize these?” Twilight asks me.
“Yes, and yes you may call me Buzz.” I clarify, still staring at the smaller, orange object.
“Can you tell us what they are?” I guess a ‘yes’ wasn’t enough of an explanation for Twilight.
“Oh, right, they’re cars, that one.” I point to the larger, silver one. “Is called a SUV, or ‘Sport Utility Vehicle’, it’s a Mercedes-Benz GL320 CDI, and that one,” I point to the smaller, orange one. “Is a ‘Sports car’, built for speed, this particular one is a Lamborghini Murcielago LP640.”
“I see, and how did you know exactly what they were called?” Why is Twilight so curious, wait, it’s Twilight, never mind.
“Well, our family own’s one like the Mercedes, and I really like Lamborghini’s, so I looked into them, does that answer your question?”
“I would say the information you provided should be adequate.” Why is Twilight being so formal? Ah, whatever.
“Hey!” A voice from above rings, a voice that could only belong to Rainbow Dash.
“What?”
“You said speed, how fast are we talkin’ here?” of corse Rainbow would be curious about that.
“We’re talkin’ 340 K/hr, or, 211 M/hr, give or take a few numbers, depending on the surface you’re driving on.”
“I don’t know what those numbers mean, but it sounds fast! It has my approval!” it’s official, the Lamborghini Murcielago LP640 is 120% Rainbow Dash approved!
“That’s all fine and dandy, but how do they work?” Rarity says, causing me to think for a moment, before I walk over to the Mercedes, and taped to the driver-side window, is another letter, this one however, has a bulge at the bottom, and the word “To DJ Buzz” on the back.
“I guess this is for me.” I say while I oped the envelope, using my finger to rip the paper, getting an audible response from Twilight and Lyra.
“What does this say, let’s see.” I begin reading the letter out loud.
“Dear Dallin/DJ Buzz
We hope you enjoy your life here in Equestria, we are giving these two vehicles to you to use at your digression, they have been enchanted, so you will never need to refuel or change the oil.
The Lamborghini has some custom upgrades that we put in our selfs, I hope you enjoy them, it wasn’t easy to make them work.
We didn’t forget about the Mercedes though, we upgraded the suspension, added more horsepower and torque, and left a special vehicle, as well as some new hockey gear for you in the back of the SUV.
We hope you like your gifts, if you ever need anything, send us a message, and we’ll do our best to accommodate you.
Sincerely yours
Princess Luna and Princess Celestia
P.S. Consider this your singing bonus”
I tip the envelope, and out come two keys, one for the Lamborghini, and one for the Mercedes.
“Well, this is most definitely, the most awesome gift I have ever been given!” I pull the handle of the Mercedes, *Clunk* “Locked, hold on.” I press the unlock button on the Mercedes key, nothing, press it again, *Click* “there we go!”
“Uh, Dallin, DJ, whatever, how did you do that? It seemed like magic, but you said you didn’t have magic where you came from.” Why do I always confuse the egghead, whatever, I have some basic knowledge on the subject anyway.
“Well, the Key, thats this thing” I hold up the key to the Mercedes. “sends a coded signal over radio waves, and the car receives these signals, and translates them into actions.”
“Is that it?” Sheesh, Twilight is persistent.
“No, there’s a whole lot more as to how it works, but that’s all I know.” Although I wish I knew more.
“Oh, alright then.”
“Holy flippin cow” I mutter under my breath.
Finally I reach out and grab the handle of the Mercedes, pull it towards me, and the door opens, making a half clicking, half clunking noise when I do, I reach into the cab, and press the button to open the back hatch.  
The hatch begins to rise, making the ‘Bring’ noise that it always make when it raises or lowers, while at the same time I come out of the cab, close the door, and walk around to the back, and I almost don’t believe what I see.
“This is amazing! I thought I’d never get to ride one again!” I must have been exited, because Rarity comes up to me and says.
“What’s got you so exited darling?”
“Oh, its this, I thought I’d never see one again, hold on, let me get it out.” I reach in and grab the base of the object, the object is two wheels, both sitting parallel to each other, and a rounded rectangle connecting them together, and a T shaped bar coming out from the front of the base.  
I pull it out, almost dropping it when the heavy, 105 pound object is out of the vehicle, but I manage to keep it in control, setting it down, I lean it against the back of the GL 320 CDI, and pick up the sticky-note attached to the top of the object.
“You never need to charge this either, hope you enjoy it!” I pull the sticky-note away, revealing a small, circular device, attached to the top.
“Hey, what is that?” A suddenly curious Rainbow Dash Inquires.
“This, is a Segway, a Segway x2 to be specific.” I say as I press the ‘Power’ button on the side of the segway key, activating it.
“That’s cool, but what does it do?” Why is Rainbow Dash suddenly the curious one? Ah, whatever.
“It’s a short range transportation device!” I tap the platform with my foot, activating the gyroscopes inside the machine, then, I step on, one foot, then the next, and I’m standing there on two parallel wheels, causing Twilight to cock her head to the side.
“How is that possible?” Twilight’s back to asking questions, great!
“Simple, it uses gyroscopes to keep me balanced, it balances me, not the other way around.” I explain to Twilight, using all my will power not to shout ‘Stop Being Curious!’
“Uh, what?”
For a brief moment, my eyes are directed straight up, while my forehead scrunches up, my right eyebrow slightly higher than my left eyebrow, then, I redirect my attention to Twilight, think for a moment, and then park the Segway against the side of the Mercedes, step off, walk to the left of the Segway, and begin repeatedly smacking my forehead against the side of the car.
after I hit my head four times, I hear a voice that can only belong to Rainbow Dash say. “Uh, Twi, I think you broke him.”
“Nonsense, he’s not broken, oh wait, maybe he is, dear sweet Celestia! I’ve broken our guest!”
With that, I stop banging my forehead, turn to Twilight and say. “Really? You actually believed that I was broken? I’m a firkin’ living being, not a machine!” I might be talking louder than I should, but I can fix that later. “I mean come on, for being so smart, you’re really gullible.”
“Am not!”
“Are so!”
“Am not!”
“Are so, and I can prove it.”
“Go ahead, make my day!”
“Hey look! Someone wrote gullible with the clouds.”
Twilight instantly looks up, then, realizing that she had just walked into a trap, hung her head in shame and embarrassment.
“Aw, come on Twi, don’t be like that! it was only a joke!” A snickering, Rainbow maned, Cyan pegasus says.
“Yeah, what she said, besides, I’ve fallen for that trick before, it just seemed to fit the situation.”
“How so?”
*Facepalm*
“What?” Twilight’s confused now, awesome!
“I said you were gullible, and I used a trick that everyone falls for to get you back for asking questions about every, little, thing!”
“I do not!”
“I’m not even gonna go there, anyway, I need to finish checking whats in the car.” I say as I walk over to the back of the Mercedes, and then pull out a large bag that has the nike logo, and the word “Bauer” written next to it.
“Hmm”
I open the bag, and inside is hockey gear, specifically, two shin guards, a pair of hockey “Shorts”, a cup (the kind only guys need), shoulder pads, and some arm guards.
“Well, looks like I’m set for hockey pads, wait, is that another one?” I say, noticing the second and third rows are folded down to fit everything in.
“Holy crap, that is, wait, this one’s bigger.” I say as I pull it out, it’s bigger at the bottom than at the top, meaning only one thing, but I should open it just to be sure.
“Hmm, I wonder.”
I open the bag, and inside is goalie pads, leg pads, blocker, catcher, helmet, chest protector, cup (this one’s a bit thicker), and the goalie pants, the whole shebang.
“Wait, am I supposed to be a skater or a goalie?” I remark in confusion.
“What ever do you mean darling?” Rarity inquires.
“Well, I’ve been given pads for a skater, and a goalie, that’s what I mean.”
“Well, we have a goalie, and a mighty good one at that, so those pads there must be for practice.” Applejack adds, after not saying anything for the longest time.
“You may already have a goalie, but all national level teams, at least where I come from, have what’s called a ‘back-up goaltender’, that way, if the main goalie is having an off day, they have someone to fill in for them.” Does that make sense? Of corse it did, stop questioning me, me.
[A.N. I often have arguments with myself in my head, so I’m telling myself to shut up.]
“Oh, I’ve never thought about having a backup, I mean, Pinkie’s so good in net, I’d of thought we’d never need a new goaltender.” A shy yellow pegasus named Fluttershy states.
“Trust me, even the best goalie can have an off day, emotions often play a large part in their performance, happiness and anger make a good goalie, while sadness and depression throws them off.” Did I just describe goalies, or Pinkie Pie?
“Well, that makes sense, and in Pinkies case, it’s twice as true.” Applejack expresses, revealing “Party of One” to be true, but I should keep my knowledge of that hidden, at least until the time is right.
“What exactly do you mean by “Twice as true”?”
“Ah mean, one time, Pinkie invited us to a party on a day when we were preparing a party for her, she took it the wrong way, and thought we were avoiden’ her.” Applejack explains. “that silly filly got so worked up, she threw a party with her, her pet alligator, gummy, a pile of rocks, a bag of flour, and a dust bunny.”
“Interesting, wait, hold on a sec.” I pull out my phone, go into my utilities folder, and tap on the “compass” app, which I’ve tested to work without 3G, and the compass comes up, and the red triangle indicating north, points to the left of me, indicating that I’m facing east. “Just as I thought, the sun’s on it’s path down, meaning it’s past noon, I’d estimate, about, three thirty in the afternoon, or sixteen thirty if you’re going by a twenty four hour clock.”
“How were you able to tell which way was north on that little thing?” More questions from the best place to get them, Twilight Sparkle!
“Easy, it has a compass built in, and it displays it on the screen.”
“I don’t fully understand.” why would Twilight understand?
“It’s technology that hasn’t been invented here, just leave it at that.” I say, shaking my head.
“Sheesh, no need to get angry.” Twi says, half guilty, half offensive.
“Sorry, I took it too far, and for that, I apologize, anyway, I’d like to take one of these for a spin before I attend the first party ever thrown for me that isn’t a birthday party.”
“Um, okay, but, which one?” Rainbow Dash asks, I bet she wants to race the Lamborghini, but not today.
“I think I’ll take the Mercedes for a spin, I need to take this stuff back to my room anyway.” I say as I re-zip the equipment bags, push them inside, pull the segway over, turn it off, and lift it back into the car, making sure it’s past the place where the hatch comes to a stop and latches shut, then, I press the lit up red button on the bottom of the hatch, shutting it, and walk over to the front door, driver side, open it, get in, close the door, insert the key into the slot, turn it, the electronics come to life, then I turn it more, I get the gauges working, telling me that everything is perfect, one more time, and the engine roars to life, making the signature *Chick-Chick* *Vroom* every gas and diesel engine makes when it’s ignited.
“Lovely.” I then proceed to lower the driver side window. “Hey, guys, you’re gonna want to stand clear.” I shout to them, hoping they hear me as I put the vehicle into reverse, turn the wheel right, and take my foot of the break.
“Oh, I can’t wait to see their faces.” I say as I look back, just to make sure I don’t hit anything, then, once I’m pointed in the direction of where my room is, I switch it into drive, and apply pressure to the gas pedal, not too much, just enough to go 20 K/hr, which is a sprinting pace for most, but probably a casual running pace for these ponies.
I look out my window, and see the ponies easily keeping up to me, so, I add more speed, now, I’m going twice the speed, now, only Applejack and Rainbow Dash are keeping up, I’d of gone faster, but my room came up, so I had to slow down and stop so I didn’t pass it.
“Well, that was fun.” I say, getting out of the car, not before putting it in park and shutting it off.
I look over to my right, and see Twilight and Lyra running up, while Fluttershy and Rarity walk behind them.
“Oh, hello slow pokes.” I say teasingly.
“I take offense to that.” Twilight complains, partially joking.
“Whatever Twi, me, AJ, and Rainbow head here all beat you.” witty comeback, LIKE A FAUST!
“Rainbow head?” I don’t think Dashie knows if thats an insult or not, neither do I.
“Relax, I’m just playin’ around.”
“Ugh, fine, just don’t ever call me that again.”
“Whatever you say, cyan head.”
“HEY!!”
“Oh, come on, I’m just kidding around, consider this payback.”
Rainbow was about to say something, then she realized what I was talking about, and promptly blushed and flashed what we call a “Bad poker face”.
“Hey, no need to get all mushy with me, besides, there’s a party to go to, and I’m assuming you would know where to go.”
“Well, yeah, follow me, I’ll take you to Sugarcube Corner, that’s generally where she holds her parties.” Rainbow reveals, seemingly glad that the subject has changed.
“Lead the way.”
“Alright, it’s kind of hard to miss, I mean, it’s a gigantic gingerbread house after all.”
“That may be true, however, I still have never been there, let’s go!”
Rainbow didn’t say anything, instead, she motioned with her hoof for me to follow, while she floated about two feet off the ground, so, we followed her, we walked behind Dash, while she floated forwards in front of us, the only thing keeping us from being exited, was the awkward silence, it lasted about two minutes, before I’d finally had enough, so, I try to start a conversation, Lyra should be easy enough.
“So, Lyra, what kinds of music do you like?”
“Well, I like orchestral, and lyre music.”
“Anything else?”
“Well, every once in a while I do enjoy going to one of Vinyls gigs, the music is great, the crowd, not so much.” She admitted with a shrug.
“So, are they like, raves or something?” I raise my right eyebrow slightly.
“yeah, exactly, you’d be amazed the number of ponies who like to get drunk and listen to techno blasting at -15db, it’s ridiculous.” Lyra only mentioning techno prompts me to ask the very question I asked when I found out I was in Equestria.
“Do you have Dubstep?”
“No, I don’t think so, what is it?” Lyra has some mix of confusion, and pondering on her face.
“It’s like techno, only completely different.”
The response to this is a collective “What?” from everypony here.
“It’s something that can’t really be described, you have to hear it.” *Insert shrug here*
“Okay then, do you have some on your comp- th-the thing with the glowin’ apple on it?” Applejack asks, not remembering the name of the “Device”.
“Computer, and yes, but, I also have some on my phone.” Why did I say that? STUPID! STUPID! STUPID!
“Phone? What in the name of Celestia is that?” Oh Rainbow, you know just how to get on my nerves, anyhow, I guess now would bee a good time to show them, good think I have siri, otherwise I’d have to unlock my phone, and guess what I was watching on youtube last time I used my phone? I’ll tell you, it was an episode of My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic.
“Well, this is a phone.” I reach into my pocket and pull out the small device with an Oilers case on it. “it’s quite capable, not as much as a computer, but still.” I press down on the home button and hold it down until I hear the signature, two tone ding that means its listening. “Play songs by : Nick Thayer” Not really dubstep, but I want to have good speakers for that.
“What good is talking to it gonna do?” Twilight asks, I think she doesn’t understand.
“Playing songs by Nick Thayer” The female voice says from out of my phone.
“Oh”
Amazingly, the song that plays is Facepalm (Dodge & Fuski Remix), the one closest to Dubstep, and one of my favorites.
They listen to the sound coming out of the tiny speaker, I’ve found a way to make the sound louder by holding my hand over the speaker, I do this so they can hear as much as possible, we listen for a bit, then, out of my phone speaker comes- “OH NO!” for those of you who don’t know, thats the drop of the song, and when it hits, I get mixed reactions.
None of the ponies can really grasp it though, considering there’s no bass, I’ll have to change that later, I pause the song and put my phone in my pocket.
“There wasn’t really any bass, when there’s bass, or even better, a subwoofer, it sounds way better.” I explain.
I get a collective “Meh”.
Without realizing it, we’ve arrived at sugarcube corner, and by without realizing it, I mean I walked right into the front door.
“OW! Who put that wall there?” If you can’t guess, I’m being sarcastic.
“Uh, that wall was there long before you ran into it.” it would appear that Twilight doesn’t quite grasp the concept of “Sarcasm”.
“Uh, T, I was being sarcastic, you know, not serious?” I shouldn't have to explain this, why do I have to explain this.
“Oh, right.” Twi gives an embarrassed blush, then, perks up, and point at the door. “Hey look, a note!”
“Notes, three down, five to go.” Why did I ever play SLENDER?
“What?” A confused flying cyan pegasus says.
“Nothing, it has something to do with a game I’ve played, what does this note say?”
Rainbow glides over to it, lands, and reads it out loud.
“Sugar Cube Corner is to small, party at the V.S. Rave Club” Rainbow steps back. “Woah, dude, this is big, if Pinkie is having your party there, you can expect to have the best night you have ever had!”
“And why is that?” Oh me, why are you so quizzical at times?
“Uh, that club is pretty much the party local of pretty much all equestria, and when Pinkie’s in charge, it basically becomes so epic that words CAN’T begin to describe it.” The Mint green unicorn in our midst proclaims (Yes, that’s Lyra)
“So, what you’re saying is, I’m about to have the most epic party ever to be held in the history of parties?”
“Yep”
“Dang, and I haven’t even been here a whole day.” I now proceed to question my existence in my mind, it has been censored due to a large amount of fowl language, and I don’t like to make fun of birds. “wait, where exactly is this club anyway?”
Twilight seems to come to a realization when I say this “It’s almost thirty kilometers out of town! we’ll never make it!”
“Well, maybe you can’t, but I’ve got my transportation, I’ll be right back.” I then run off in the direction we came from.
Alright, Library, where is it? it’s a giant tree after all, it can’t be that easy to… oh, there it is.
“hmm, keys.” I check the pockets of my hoodie, sure enough, I put the keys there. “Perfect.”
I unlock the car, raise the door, get in, lower the door, and harness in.
“Here we go, don’t fail me now.” I insert the key, turn it, and get a satisfying *ChickChack* *Vroom*, much like the mercedes, only LOUDER! “Time for some fun, wait, isn’t this supposed to be manual? oh, right, magic, never mind.
I switch on the headlights, it’s getting dark after all, rotate the wheel in the desired direction, put it in gear, and take off.
-- *3rd person view*
“What’s taking him so long? I thought he said he’d be back soon!” A very annoyed Twilight complains, she’s about to say something else when the sound of a roaring engine interrupts her. “what in the sweet mane of Celestia is that?”
“Uh, Twi, I’d move if I was you.” Rainbow Dash warns.
--*First Person*
“AWWW YEAHH!” I say as I speed towards sugarcube corner.
“No need to move, I’ve got a hand brake for that.” I release my foot from the gas, apply a little pressure to the break to slow down, then release that too, pull the hand break, and turn the wheel, proceeding to do a full 180º turn before coming to a stop.
“Now THAT is what I’m talking about!” I switch off the engine, open the door, and walk over to the slightly stunned ponies behind the car. “Okay, that was AWESOME!”
“Dude, how’d you do that?” a slightly amazed, slightly shocked, Rainbow Dash asks me.
“A combination of knowledge, physics, and breaks.” I have presented the equation in the most simple form, no translation needed.
“So you read about how to do that?” Silly Rainbow, no I didn’t, oh wait, I’d better say that out lout.
“No, I saw someone else do it, so I figured id give it a shot.” This is taking too long. “Let’s just go, I need a navigator in the car with me, any volunteers?”
Leave it to Twilight to point out a complication. “How? those seats weren’t designed for ponies!”
“Easy, there’s a switch in the car that lets me change the seat to suit a ponies’ anatomy, rather than a humans, at least, thats what the note inside the car said.” Don’t ask, I’m not covering every note I find.
“Alright, I’ll go with you, I know the way the best.” Twilight agrees.
“Okay, let’s go, do all of you have a way there?” I get a collective nod. “alright, see you there.”
I open the passenger door, and sure enough, right on the side of the seat, is a button that has the general shape of a pony on it, I press it, and the seat changes from the normal seat, to one a pony could easily use.
“Alright Twi, hop in.” I say as I walk over to the other side, open the door, and get in.
“Are you sure this is safe?” The questioning Lavender unicorn inside my car asks.
“Of corse not, but if it was safe, it wouldn’t be fun.” I say as I re-attach my safety harness. “And you might want to strap in.”
“Oh, right.” She figures out how to safely strap herself in, don’t ask me how, she just does.
“Ready to go?” I ask, Twi seems nervous, better change that. “Close the door, it’s harder to fall out that way.”
“R-right, o-o-of corse.” She’s trembling, better not scare her.
I close my door as she does as well, then, I put the key in, and start the engine.
“Alright, get ready to navigate, and be quick, we don’t want to be late.” I put the car in gear again. “and this car is also quite fast.” and with that, we take off again. “where to twi?”
“Right! okay, when you get outside of town, look for gigantic spotlight into the sky.” Really Twilight? REALLY?
“Wow, specific.” Sarcasm alert.
“Hey, it’s a gigantic building in the middle of nowhere, it’s really hard to miss.” Case defender Twilight, reporting to annoy the crap out of me.
“Alright, I guess you get a joyride then.” I floor it, hoping to get the G-forces up a bit, I do.
“SLOW DOWN! SLOW DOWN! SLOW DOWN!!” Ms.Lavender Panic Pants isn’t having nearly as much fun as I am.
“Relax, I think I see the place up ahead.” At the speed we’re traveling, it wouldn’t take long anyways, and after all, it’s pretty hard to miss a gigantic building in the middle of nowhere.
“Tell me when we get there!” I’m going to assume by what Twilight is saying, and how she’s saying it, that her eyes are closed.
Soon enough, we arrive at the door, and let me tell you, the looks on the ponies faces that saw my car pull up, were, and still are, priceless.
“Yo, Twilight, we’re here.” this seemed to get a collective jolt, and a sigh of relief from her.
“C-can I get out now?” I guess I’ve had enough fun for one night, so I unlock the doors (they lock automatically when I travel faster than, about 20 K/hr).
“Th-thank you.” she opens her door, and gets out, and I pull my car around to the side of the building, shut it off, get out, lock it, and head back to the front of the building to meet Twilight, but to my surprise, everyone (everypony, everybody.) is there, Dash, Lyra, Fluttershy, Rarity, and of corse Twilight are there.
“Well, hello crazy ponies I’ve never met before.” I usually do this with friends, it means nothing, just some friendly banter, dash get’s it immediately, no one else does.  
“What’s that supposed to mean? you met us earlier, I was WITH you on your way here!” Twilight, always questioning and complaining.
“Again, my world is different from yours, what I just said is a way I’d greet my friends, it’s sarcasm.”
“...oh” Oh Twilight, you’re so silly.
“anyhow, let’s just go in, I’d prefer not to stand outside in the dark, I don’t trust the environment here.” it’s a club, and it’s night, these ponies are likely drunk, so I’d like to go inside, there’s probably more security there, probably.
“Alright then, lets go!” Lyra seems just as eager about going in as I am.
We walk in, and the first thing I notice, is the blaring music, it’s not so loud that it deafens me, but it’s still very loud.
“Well, either I left my headphones on, or the music in here is extremely loud.”
“WHAT?!” I guess no one heard me, so I gesture that it doesn’t matter.
Then, out of nowhere, the music stops, so we walk further into the club, right into the main area, and what I see, I don’t believe, there are gigantic speakers, a giant banner that says “DJ-Pon3 presents - the Vinyl Scratch Rave Club” and of corse, Vinyl Scratch herself, and who should be siting next to her, but Pinkie Pie, and she’s got a mic right now.
“GOOOOOD EVENING! HOW IS EVERYPONY TONIGHT!?!” Leave it to Pinkie to go overboard, and the crowd answers her question with loud cheering.
“THAT’S AWESOME! DID YOU KNOW WE HAVE A NEW GUY IN TOWN? HE’S NOT A PONY, OR ANY ANIMAL I’VE SEEN, BUT LET ME TELL YOU, HE’S AN AMZING PERSON, SO, GIVE IT UP FOR, DALLIN!!!” just as Pinkie says this, a huge spotlight shines right on me, I was always bad with crowds, especially when I was the centre of attention, I get some cheers, some “huh?”s, and a whole lot of “WTF” faces.
“AND NOW, HE’D LIKE TO SAY A FEW WORDS!” Dangit Pinkie! Anyhow, she manages to get the mic to me.
All right, come on Buzz, think! Whats the best way to win this crowd? I’ve got it!
“I Like Ike.” well, they felt like my last words, although my name isn’t Indiana Jones, and this isn’t a movie where a refrigerator is dense enough to survive a nuke. “That’s all I got, I just came because 1. Pinkie said she organized it. and 2. For the sick Beats, and I think Pinkie’s part is done.” I think Vinyl get’s where I’m going with this, so she whispers something to Pinkie, then starts up the music again.  
Then, Lyra pulls me aside, and asks me this question. “Can I interview you?”