Rainbow Dash Writes A Fanfiction
Looking Out On A Starry Evening
Princess Twilight Sparkle sat on her balcony. Her telescope was sitting, out and waiting for her. Twilight's horn sparkled as she picked up a sleeping Spike. His snores came slowly. Twilight giggled and set him down on a pillow. Then she looked up at the beautiful night sky, watching all the stars twinkle. Luna did a good job on the moon today, she thought.
Her mane was brushed perfectly and her crown on straight. Everything seemed perfect about her, but it really wasn't.
She had many unanswered questions that she had been meaning to ask the princesses.
The stars continued to twinkle and shine, and a light breeze was blowing through the trees and grass. Twilight could hear it rustling softly and considered it beautiful. Then the questions started to flood her mind.
"What is my purpose?"
"Why are these stars here?"
"Who created the universe?"
"Are there other beings in outer space?"
And on, and on, until she felt it was enough for one night. She decided to herself that she would ask Celestia her long list of questions the next day. And with that, she went into the library and curled up into bed, and dreamt about her questions.
The only sound in the morning was the beating of Princess Twilight's wings. The dew was just formed on the flowers and the sun shone weakly. Ponies were still asleep. Twilight had been flying all night just to get to Canterlot. Finally the castle came into sight and, being as exhausted as she was, collapsed on the balcony. Celestia stepped out onto the balcony to find Twilight laying there out of breath.
"Twilight, my student, what brings you here this fine morning?"
"I have some...questions...to...ask...you..."
Twilight panted heavily between words.
Celestia was taken aback. Clearly Twilight had flown all the way from Ponyville...just to ask some questions?
"All right...What must you ask me?"
Twilight took a deep breath.
"OK, well...I hope you don't think this is too deep, but...
What is my purpose? Why am I here? How did you get enough power to raise the sun? When did my life start and when will it end? Why exactly does Luna have to raise every single star? Who's that guy walking down there? Why is my mane black with stripes and why does it have stripes? How does your and Luna's mane flow like that, are they mechanical? How am I here? How am I standing on this balcony? How can I touch stuff and not have my hoof go through? How--"
"That's clearly enough, Twilight."
Luna came onto the balcony.
"What is going on, dear sister?"
"Twilight is asking all these questions. Things like life, death, and just plain unexplainable things."
"Didn't Sunset Shimmer do the same thing?"
"Yes, I believe she did."
Celestia looked down on Twilight.
"Twilight, I am very sorry, but I do not think I can answer any of these questions. Why don't you write down more explainable questions on a scroll and send them to me? Oh, and you simply don't have to fly here. You could have teleported."
Twilight facehoofed.
Twilight lay awake staring at the ceiling. The questions echoed in her mind like she was in a cave. Spike was fast asleep. Twilight felt as if she was the only one in Ponyville who was still awake. The scroll of questions, as she called it, was enormous. If she unrolled it at the top of the stairs it would go all the way to the bottom. She put her hooves behind her head. Slowly her body nodded off to sleep.
Twilight's dream was twisted. She floated in a toilet with her questions revolving around her when the toilet flushed.
"Twilight."
She opened her eyes. She was standing in the same place she appeared in when she became a princess. Luna looked down at her fondly.
"Twilight, I think I may be able to answer some of those questions of yours."
Twilight's eyes grew wide.
"I created the universe. Your mane has stripes because I painted it while you were sleeping. Your life will never end, you are a princess, you dumbass. Your purpose has yet to be revealed, I know it but alas it would not be right to inform you just yet. You can touch things without going through them because they are made of atoms and atoms are hard like a penis."
Twilight fainted abruptly.
"It's true! I watched her the whole time!"
The counselor raised an eyebrow at Derpy.
"I think you need to see a doctor."
Rainbow Dash snickered as she showed the fanfiction to Sunset Shimmer. Sunset Shimmer was laughing so hard she fell over on the ground and rolled over. Rarity pulled her neck away from the paper and fainted.
Epilogue
So one day Rainbow Dash posted it on Fernferctun.nert. It was a site where all the story wiuturs posted fernficturn. Rarity secretly made an anonymous account and upvoted the story over 9,000 times.
She also wrote dirty clop.
One day, Rarity sent Sweetie Belle to school. She thought Sweetie Belle was at school. She typed away at her dirty clop. She even had a dirty cover image. She didnt hear Sweetie Belle come in after school. She was watching some dirty vids for reference. Sweetie Belle came in.
Sweetie Belle made that face and said, "Rarity!" Rarity turned around and smiled guiltily.
"You're just like me <3" said Sweetie Belle.
Rarity just about fainted because of what Sweetie Belle said. Because techniaclly she just admitted to writing pony clop which is what Rarity does. So Sweetie Belle shrugged it off and sort of read Rarity's story. By the time she was done with it, she was panting. {This story should be rated M} She turned off the computer and fainted on top of Rarity. When Twilight Sparkle came in for her dress order, she facehoofed at the little pony pile. Sweetie Belle had a sign on her face that said, "Don't check my internet history."
So Twilight did what a natural Twilight does.
By the time the sun had set, everyone in Ponyville had fainted in a heap.
Celestia looked at all her security cameraa.
She laughed really hard and banished the Internet to the moon.
THE FINAL END
