The Dazzlings: A Dazzling Glass of Milk
The moon had been in the sky for quite some time and the citizens of Canterlot were sound asleep including the Dazzlings in their apartment, our story begins in Aria Blaze’s room which had the walls plastered with punk rock posters and Aria herself was sleeping soundly in her bed. Suddenly a noise awakens her “hmmm” she says still a little sleepy, she waited a minute. However, the noise didn’t return; Aria was just about to go back to sleep when the sound did return and louder this time it was like something was falling outside of Aria’s door in the living room. “A burglar.” Aria thought to herself with a grin as she cracked her knuckles “wait till I get through with him.” Aria got out of bed and headed into the hallway that had the three doors behind which were the Dazzlings rooms “wait what if he’s loaded?” Aria thought about waking Adagio or Sonata and having them go first but decided against it, from the hallway she peeked in and on the right side of the room (the left side had the living room) somebody was helping themselves to the fridge and strangely bellow the fridge door Aria could see pink bunny slippers “okay probably just some nut off the street” Aria once again cracked her knuckles and prepared to strike as she slowly approached the intruder she snuck behind the fridge door and prepared to strike “I’m gonna hit you so hard it’ll wake up your dentist!” she declared jumping to the intruder but then once she saw the intruder she saw someone familiar “Sonata?” she asked surprised, surely enough it was Sonata Dusk in her two piece yellow pajamas with pink hearts.
Sonata didn’t responded to Aria, in fact, her eyes were shut as she devoured everything in the fridge “juice from the candy milk wizard” she said dreamily as she downed all the chocolate milk.
“Sonata?” Aria repeated as she watched Sonata continue her feast. “Okay, you must be hungry but you’re gonna eat us out of house and home!”
Sonata turned toward Aria and started walking in a dream state “Whoa hey I’m not edible” she said as she turned her head and as she did her hair swished around and some of it got into Sonata’s mouth and surprisingly Sonata didn’t spit it out actually she reeled back and pulled a clump of hair from Aria and then she swallowed it. “What the hell is wrong with you?” Aria demanded.
Sonata sighed dreamily “but we can’t cross the river without pickles.”
“Wait, Sonata are you asleep?” Aria asked.
One again Sonata sighed “gotta help captain kangaroo through the candy cane jungle.”
“Yep those are definitely Sonata’s dreams” Aria thought to herself as she rushed to Adagio’s room.
Adagio Dazzle’s room was the biggest of the three and was mostly filled with average things however there was a large desk where the shattered remains of three red jewels remained and as for Adagio herself she was currently sleeping with two green objects in her ears. Aria let herself into Adagio’s room and quickly jumped on her bed “Adagio!” she declared.
Adagio groaned in her sleep “no Sonata, we can’t build a snowman, it’s July and stop watching that stupid movie!”
“Adagio wake up!” Aria declared shaking Adagio awake.
Once again Adagio groaned “what’s the matter now Sonata?” she asked only just now opening her eyes and removing her earplugs “have another bad dream? Fine just get in and I’ll---” however when she saw who she was talking to her expression changed entirely “that never leaves this room” she declared blushing.
“Agreed” said Aria though of course she would bring it up later “Adagio we’ve got a problem with Sonata!”
For the third time Adagio groaned “I know you think she’s ‘the worst’ but can’t you wait till morning to complain?” She asked laying back down.
“No I mean Sonata’s in the kitchen eating all our food and I think she’s sleeping” Aria explained.
Adagio yawned “fine let’s go” she said suddenly noticing the missing clump from Aria’s hair “hey nice haircut.”
“Sonata tried to eat me” said Aria.
“You have nothing to worry about” Adagio told her with a giggle “you’re too bitter to eat.”
At that moment the two reached the kitchen where Sonata had eaten well over half the food the Dazzlings owned “see!” declared Aria.
“I do” responded Adagio “Sonata!” she shouted but Sonata continued her feast un-phased “Sonata wake up!” Adagio shouted again once again to no avail as Sonata swallowed an entire box of cookies, an entire loaf of bread, and an entire bag of potato chips.
“Man isn’t she ever full?” demanded Aria.
“Probably not, since she’s sleeping she has no concept of ‘full’ so she’ll just keep eating” Adagio explained.
“Well the good news is sooner or later she’ll run out of food” Aria responded. Aria was right soon enough Sonata had eaten all the food in the Dazzlings apartment down to the last crumb.
“Well at least she’ll have to stop now” Adagio declared as she looked over the fallen soldiers of empty boxes and bags “she should go to her room now and then we can go to the store tomorrow.” However rather then turn for her room Sonata turned to the front door and opened it.
“Now where’s she going?” asked Aria.
“I got a bad feeling she’s going wherever there’s a fridge” responded Adagio as the two took off into the hall where a quiet scene awaited “Sonata?” Adagio called suddenly there was a loud bang from the next door apartment and Sonata came out with the entire fridge in her arms which she shook to allow the food into her mouth which was open to impossible lengths.
“Whoa! Tell me I wasn’t dreaming!” Aria exclaimed with a laugh “she took the whole fridge!”
Sonata finished her meal and placed the now empty fridge just outside of the door.
“Thank Celestia those neighbors are on vacation” said Adagio. The Dazzling’s lived in an apartment complex close to Equestria University so a lot of their neighbors were college students and fortunately it was spring break so a lot of apartments were empty “It’s not funny Aria” said Adagio struggling to keep a straight face “okay so it is pretty funny but still we need to stop Sonata” she declared heading off after her sleeping comrade.
“Why?” Aria questioned as she took off after Adagio.
The two chased Sonata to another apartment as she entered through the door (the complex staffed a house sitter to care for the occupant’s apartments when they were away but she was quite infamous among the residents for never locking doors) “We’ve got to stop her!” Adagio declared but Aria held her back.
“Whoa, whoa” Aria exclaimed “I say we take a back seat for the show.” The two girls watched from the door-frame as Sonata opened the fridge and went to work, first she grabbed a grape vine and threw it into the air and immediately grasped the milk carton and began drinking quickly “woohoo!” Aria cheered “go Sonata go!” Sonata finished the milk in a flash and just as quickly spit out the jug and opened her mouth for the falling grapes, she quickly devoured all the grapes and spit out the vine, next she balanced a watermelon on her finger and spun it before bringing it to her mouth and slowly eating it as it spun then spit out the seeds, Sonata then sucked down an entire bowl of Jell-O in two seconds, and finally Sonata took out a piece of bread and wiped her mouth as though it were a napkin before throwing it in the air and chomping it down.
“Not bad” Adagio responded.
“I can’t figure out where she’s putting it all” exclaimed Aria suddenly they both looked in and noticed a messy kitchen with no Sonata “where’d she go?”
After investigating the apartment fully and confirming Sonata was nowhere to be found the two met in the kitchen to discuss what to do “do you think Sonata swallowed herself?” Adagio asked.
“If she did I call dibs on her room” Aria said with a grin. Suddenly both girls heard something falling nearby but they couldn’t tell from where, they both sprinted into the hall where there was still no Sonata but several more doors were now open.
“Okay” exclaimed Adagio “you go downstairs and check the lobby while I look up here.”
“Okay” Aria responded.
“And if you find her stop her, and don’t stand and watch!” Adagio added.
“Fine” responded Aria. The girls split up and Adagio searched the other apartments finding each completely vacant of food but she found no sign of Sonata. As for Aria she searched the main lobby where it seemed Sonata had yet to get to as neither the vending machines nor the landlords mini-fridge. Aria was just about to give up and go find Adagio when someone put a hand on her from behind.
“Mr. Marshmallow is my very bestest friend” said Sonata.
“Hmmmm” Adagio thought to herself “if I were Sonata and sleep eating inhuman amounts of food where would I be?” Adagio thought about checking the local Taco Bell before a blood curdling scream pierced the night. Adagio followed the scream downstairs and found herself in front of the landlord’s office she opened the door and found a strange sight.
Sonata had Aria half submerged in her mouth (her cheeks were stretched to impossible lengths) “gross, gross, gross!” Aria screamed from within Sonata’s cheeks.
Adagio chuckled “I wish I brought the camera” she jeered.
“I better not hear you laugh!” Aria declared.
“Don’t worry you won’t” said Adagio closing the office door and then momentarily roaring with laughter for a few moments before putting on a straight face and opening the door “there I’m okay now, oh she spit you out” Adagio declared and it was true Aria was standing in the middle of the office with her head dripping spit but there was again no sign of Sonata although the back window was open.
“I don’t care if she was asleep or not she dies for this!” Aria declared.
The two girls headed back into the lobby and found a trail of empty food boxes and bags waiting for them “whoa I haven’t seen this many food boxes in the super market” Adagio commented.
“I know Sonata must’ve swiped half the neighborhood’s food and eaten it too” Aria said once again seeming to find the whole situation amusing “whoa check it out” she added pointing to an empty economy sized box of cupcakes which was empty “she ate a whole box of cupcakes!”
“And three pizzas” Adagio added as she motioned toward three empty pizza boxes “come on follow the trash and we find Sonata.”
The two followed the trail of trash back upstairs and it led them straight to their apartment “does this mean she’s finally full?” Aria inquired.
“For now I guess” Adagio responded as she opened the door and the two followed the trash to Sonata’s room where they let themselves in and as she entered Aria slipped on an empty food box and landed in Sonata’s stuffed animals.
Sonata’s room could easily be mistaken for much younger girls room (technically much, much, much younger) the walls were sea blue and there was a vast collection of stuffed animals. Aria popped her head out of a pile of stuffed animals and pulled out a cake hidden in the pile “finders’ keepers!” she declared happily.
“Ummm, Aria” Adagio exclaimed pointing to the bed.
“What?” Aria inquired as she turned her attention to the bed tears welling up in her eyes as she struggled to keep a straight face, there was Sonata sleeping soundly with a string of sausages in her mouth and a large pile of food under her, her stomach had also grown to around six times its normal size. Aria burst out laughing.
“Sonata seems quite content among all that food” Adagio pointed out.
“Yeah like a beached whale” Aria declared as she hopped on Sonata’s stomach the blue haired girl still fast asleep “she looks so natural” Aria said with false sweetness “oh Sonata” she added picking up Sonata’s head “oh Sonata” she repeated before she started to shake Sonata senseless “wake up Goldilocks!”
Sonata looked around blissfully unaware of her deeds “hi girls, what are you doing in my room?” she inquired, before gasping excitedly “are we having a slumber party, I love slumber parties!”
“No stupid, this isn’t a slumber party” Aria corrected without a hint of mercy.
“Sonata are you aware that you sleep walk?” Adagio asked “and have possibly eaten enough food to put several of our neighbors out of house and home?”
Sonata crawled out of bed and landed on her belly which was now testing the limits of her pajama top “not only that” Sonata responded “I feel as though I’ve eaten enough food to put several of our neighbors out of house and home” at that moment she noticed the clump of hair missing form Aria’s head “oh nice haircut Aria.”
“Don’t you remember anything?” Adagio asked.
“You were great you ate everything” Aria declared as she helped herself to some of the pile.
“Even Aria” Adagio added with a grin.
At that moment the bottom half of Sonata’s pajama top gave way and her belly broke out almost reaching the floor (fortunately the top half held keeping her chest unexposed) Sonata gave a small scream “oh no I ate Aria?” she said reaching for her belly “I’m sorry Ari I’ll get you out, don’t worry Ari I’ll get you out, don’t tell Dagi Ari!” she declared as she started hitting her stomach. “Girls help me!” she begged.
“Relax we’ll sleep here to keep an eye on you” said Adagio “got any blankets?” she inquired as she opened the closet and a mountain of food fell down.
“Come on Ari time for bed” Sonata declared as she patted her tummy.
It wasn't long before Sonata began to sleepwalk again soon this time heading for the apple tree the neighbors were growing on their patio “That a girl Sonata!” Aria cheered as Sonata finished her work and began to fall before grabbing a pair of panties from the Dazzlings laundry which acted as a parachute.
“Oh fuck those are my panties!” Aria exclaimed.
“This is so going on YouTube!” Adagio responded filming the whole thing with her phone.
The two girls ran downstairs and grabbed Sonata as she hit the ground and returned to their apartment. Sonata didn’t sleep walk for the rest of the night and the next day the Dazzlings put a string of bells on Sonata’s door which would hopefully alert them next time this happened, the land lord decided that the house sitters record finally caught up with her and fired her, the land lord also repaired for damages and replaced everyone’s food.
“All and all happy ending” said Aria as she and Adagio sat in an old wagon when suddenly the wagon came to a stop.
“Hey girls” said Sonata from the front of the wagon where she pulled the old vehicle around on a bicycle “I’m getting tired can’t I take a break?”
“You’re in training Sonata you have to work off that weight somehow” replied Adagio.
“Yeah” Aria agreed "now get moving chunky I wanna see you sweat!”
Author's Note
Thanks to: http://supersaiyan3goku.deviantart.com/
For coming up with the laundry joke