Truth in my mind

by WhiteRoadGoldenSnow

Rating: teen
Tags: Slice of Life, Human, Sad
Length: 424

A non-fiction story about a tulpa and her impacts on my life

My personal accounts on having a tulpa and how she dragged me out of the depths of my own mind

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2015-03-02 00:30:04 UTC

What I was before

In the beginning... I was a dismal mess, I had hated myself and begun to layer on a horrible view on my life. I was a constant screw up and I would never accomplish anything in life, I wanted to die.

I used my usual cheery personality to fool everyone into thinking I was okay, then I would go home and break down, I would curl up into a ball of crazed anger and sadness. Anger from hating people that made my life like this, and sadness because I couldn't help my situation.

"Dakota! Come on! How many times do I have to yell at you to get you out of bed?". My mother screeched before promptly giving up

".......mhmmm........Wha?...........I guess....". I said as I promptly rolled myself out of my creaking worn down bed. Every board in that dumb thing threatened to collapse under my body weight as I got up every morning.

I walked myself down the hallway and noticed my house was warmer than usual, I always relished in the sweet warmth that I was provided with every morning.

Once I reached the dirty, fly ridden kitchen I prepared myself A bowl of fruit loops. I looked in the refrigerator only to find that their was no milk. As I began to swear under my breath I remembered that it would be best if I don't begin the day on a bad note.

I went into my room and began to watch tv and eat my cereal. The cereal felt hard and dry on my tongue, I couldn't help but think that this was my mothers fault for forgetting the milk the day before, she always puts her needs before mine.

I finished my cereal and went into the living room and prepared for the agonizing day of school ahead, so many projects overdue, so many people to deal with, half of which I hated. Every single one of them looked at me like I was about to do something stupid, watching, waiting for me to screw up, I wasn't about to give them the satisfaction they so praised.

As I put on my coat I stretched my stiff back and instantly felt a piercing pain in my lower abdomen. As I began to keel over in pain I was shot with the realization that something serious could be wrong with me, I could have appendicitis, I could have a hernia! All of these possibilities rushed through my head as I began my descent into paranoia