A Blueblood for Everyone

by Macgyver644200

Rating: everyone
Tags: Slice of Life, Main 6, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Romance, Prince Blueblood, Princess Celestia
Length: 72160

Who is Blueblood? He acted like a jerk during the Gala, but why? What is he really like? Which unlucky mare would he be ideally suited to?

What do we know about Blueblood? He's the only stallion worthy of being called 'Prince'. He's one of the most eligible bachelors in Equestria. He considers himself the most important pony in the world. He was a complete and total git to the bearer of the Element of Generosity at the biggest party in Canterlot. Nothing else.

However, first appearances are rarely completely correct, and there is a lack of hard fact about him. Who is this strange stallion? Was he a bureaucrat who just wanted to get back to work? An independent prankster who didn't get Celestia's message about other pranksters? A fluff-brain who had no idea what he was supposed to do? Or is he just a stuffy jerk with good qualities that can be drudged up? Most importantly, who would he hit it off with?

Cover image provided by Niban-Destikim. While the Twilight Sparkle stories are in canon with The Early Life of Blueblood, the other stories will feature entirely different versions of Blueblood. Updated when I have an idea. Credit to The Great Derpsby for inspiring me to do this.

Published 2015-04-19 04:20:01 UTC
Last updated 2018-06-11 05:39:28 UTC

Blueblood the Mercurial - Twilight Sparkle

Prince Blueblood scowled onto the crowd at the Opening of Parliament Social, cursing his aunt. He had hoped, after the fool he'd made of himself at the Grand Galoping Gala, that he would be excluded from having to attend these kinds of events. He was, for a few months. However, due to either his aunt's forgiveness or her perverse sense of punishment, he had been pressured to attend this one and 'encouraged' to mingle. Even normally, that would have been laughable, but surrounded by such a variety of utter idiots (he knew, he had to proofread their bills), it was impossible.

Thus, he searched the sea of lobbyists, politicians, and aides. He'd given up on seeing his friends in the crowd and just focused on every single mare he could find. One of those mares was looking to romance him to support some stupid cause of hers, he'd bet on it. Once he found her, then the game would begin. His mission: to annoy her as much as possible for as long as possible, bonus points if the 'date' lasted past midnight or if he could do something absolutely outrageous to her. No-one got hurt, since the idiot trying to romance favors would simply have a long night dreaming of doing him grevious bodily harm, then simply move on to find somepony else to beg favors from. He didn't get anypony else these days.

He stopped searching. One time had been different. His target had actually been legitimately interested in him. It wasn't the most flattering of desires, but it had been sincere. Furthermore, she was a friend of a... now he didn't really know. But her letter chewing him out had hurt more than he thought it would, and he was very much missing her letters. It'd been so long since he'd enjoyed a conversation, almost as long as since he'd stopped taking his...

Blueblood shook his head vigorously. 'It's almost over,' he thought to himself. 'I can control it. I don't need help.'

"I heard that Princess Twilight is here."

Blueblood's ears perked up and his head whipped around. Daisinell, right-wing MP from Steeplechase Hill, was walking by with her aide, Blueblood Didn't Care. "Well," he said, "I don't think she's here, exactly. One of the servants said that he'd seen her headed up one of the towers with a telescope."

Daisinell huffed. "Nuts. It would've been excellent to have support from an actual royal." She was glared right at Blueblood as she said this, and he glared back at her. Then she turned back to her aide, smiling. "Ah, well, maybe next time. C'mon, you've really got to try Quiche Lorraine the way the royal cooks do it."

Blueblood ignored the two as they walked off; he was thinking.

'You'll be wasting your time. After your last letter, there's no way she'd ever forgive you. Besides, why would she want to talk to you? She has friends. She even has a boyfriend. Why does she need you?'

Blueblood frowned, glaring off into nothingness. Then he got up and walked off.

'I need her.'

<*>

It had taken him thirty minutes to find a servant he was certain wouldn't rat him out to Celestia and another twenty to get there, but he finally made it to the right tower. He opened the door to the balcony slowly and silently. Sure enough, there she was, toiling over a telescope and happily humming something to herself. Blueblood stood in the doorway, swallowed, counted to ten, and forced himself to walk over to her. Finally, he cleared his throat. "Hello, Twilight."

Twilight looked up, and she frowned at him. "Blueblood," she said in a measured tone. "It's been a long time."

Blueblood forced himself to speak. "Twilight, I'm extremely sorry about what I did at the Gala, and what I told you afterwards."

Twilight's face didn't change. "You really mean that?"

"I said it, why wouldn't I mean it?"

Twilight sighed. "Blueblood, you've changed over the past few months. I can understand being mad at Rarity, but what you said to me was just..." Twilight took a deep breath. "Blueblood, you're a pain in the flank when you're sane, but you're not cruel."

"I made a mistake. I'm sorry."

"A mistake? Blueblood, have you forgotten what you wrote? Your letter was one of the nastiest things I've ever read. It actually broke my heart to read, and I tore it up before Spike could read it. That's not a mistake, that's a sign you've relapsed. I just wanted to help you. I still do, but I can't just make you get better. I need to be sure you'll actually accept my help."

Blueblood took a deep breath before he responded. "I know."

Twilight looked into his eyes for a few seconds, then scowled at him. "You're still not taking your medication, are you?"

Blueblood looked away from her with barely disguised annoyance.

Twilight groaned. "Blueblood, you remember the months leading up to your coronation. You got snappy and paranoid because you had depression. You had depression because your brain was reabsorbing serotonin too quickly, and that happens to you because you aren't taking your medication!"

Blueblood scowled at her. "Well neither are you."

"Yes, I am," she told him.

"I'm not stupid, Twilight," Blueblood growled. "I remember the Smarty Pants incident. I wrote an amicus curiae for it."

"Then you should remember that I was ordered to go back on my medication," Twilight snapped, "and I'm still on it, thank you very much! Just like you should be!"

"Oh, like does you any good!" Blueblood shouted. "Kidnapping pets, causing riots, endangering my little brother, oh yes, your medication has helped you sooo much! Or maybe that's just you while you're sane, an idiot with flashy magic who got lucky!"

Blueblood glared at Twilight for several long seconds, teeth bared in a snarl. Twilight glared back at him, but she had backed away from him, silent. They spent several moments like this, tension building between them.

Then Blueblood's words sunk into his mind. Shame washed his anger away, leaving only emptiness behind. He opened his mouth, but he choked on his words as one thought played in his mind. "I'm sorry," Blueblood mumbled. "I thought... I'll just leave you be." He turned around and walked towards the door, tears starting to run down his face. A few steps away from it, though, he heard a pop and he bumped into something.

"I won't say 'I told you so'."

Blueblood turned away from Twilight's voice. "You're not stupid for overestimating yourself and you're not a horrible pony for what happened while you were off it. You're one of the smartest ponies I know, and one of my closest friends. I forgive you, and I promise I'll do my very best not to abandon you as long as you're trying when you can."

There was a soft poof, and Blueblood pulled away from the tissue trying to mop up his tears. After a moment, Twilight poofed it away. "You said that, Blueblood," she said, " to me, right after the Smarty Pants incident, while you weren't depressed. You support me, so let me support you. Just tell me what you want, and I'll do what I can."

Blueblood turned back to face her, looking into her eyes. But then he sighed and closed his eyes. Twilight walked over to the telescope. "Nice night," Twilight said. "I'm hoping it stays that way for the weekend."

"It probably will," Blueblood said, not turning to face Twilight. "If not, there's always next year."

Twilight looked over at Blueblood. "Are we talking about the same thing?" she asked.

"Well, I assume we're talking about the meteor shower this Saturday," Blueblood said. "Otherwise, we'd probably be talking about the transit of Jupiter by Mars on Sunday, which is considerably more rare."

Twilight stared at him. "...that's right. I didn't know you'd taken up astronomy."

"I needed a hobby." Blueblood frowned as he walked over to the balcony, looking up at the sky. "Everything else I read about reminded me of my job and those idiots in Parliament. I can't believe after the 'vaccinations cause autism' debacle, the left wing still has the gall to call the right anti-reason. It's like Discord, old Discord, calling Sombra a menace to society."

Twilight frowned a bit, but relented quickly and got back to the telescope. "Yeah, I don't think I thank you and your family enough for dealing with national policy. Saving the world is hard enough."

Blueblood nodded. "I imagine it is, especially given there are really only a hoof-full ponies to talk to about it."

"Yeah."

Twilight kept checking the telescope and Blueblood looked over at her. After a few moments, Twilight looked over at him, and he quickly turned away. She frowned at him, then went back to work on the telescope, leaving Blueblood to his thoughts. Then he turned back to her. "Twilight," he asked, "have you ever felt... not fully satisfied with a conversation? Like you're talking to a friend about a subject you both know and like, but you're dreading when the conversation will turn from that subject to something they don't know anything about and you're just... left hanging."

Twilight shrugged. "Sometimes, but that's usually a time to bring it up with friend that shares said interest."

Blueblood sighed. "If you have them. Those of mine who haven't moved away, I've fallen out of touch with, for one reason or another. I've been so busy with my princely duties, I've become just as bad as y-" He stopped himself.

"That's alright," Twilight said. "I was pretty bad in my heyday." She turned back to Blueblood. "Although that makes me wonder, how much work do you have?" she asked.

Blueblood put an itch that just sprouted up out of his mind. "Well, I'm part of a team, but I look over most of the bills and I oversee the running of Parliament. Between those two tasks, I'm kept very busy."

Twilight looked into Blueblood's eyes. "And just out of curiosity, are there enough ponies on that team to take up enough work that you can have something like a social life without overworking them?"

Blueblood fought the urge to scratch the itch on his neck. "Well, I don't-"

Twilight put her hoof up. "Could they, or couldn't they?"

Blueblood turned away. "Yes, they could."

"Sooooo, why don't they?"

Blueblood frowned. "Because I don't want them to."

"Why not?"

Blueblood didn't answer. Instead, he looked out over the city of Canterlot. "Is it because you don't think other ponies are smart enough for you to hang out with?" Twilight asked.

"It's not that I think they're stupid," he said. "It's, well..." he turned back to Twilight, "How do you do it? Being in a group of friends where you're the smartest person there by far? I don't mean how you can be their friend-"

"I know what you mean," Twilight said. "And I know what you're talking about. Yeah, it can get pretty lonely sometimes. Your letters actually helped a lot with that."

"Yes, but it's not the same thing as speaking in person." Blueblood sighed. "Maybe I'm just putting too much emphasis on intelligence. I just hate being the only person in my IQ range in my social circle. I can't even imagine having a girlfriend who's not able to keep up with me, as much as I want to find somepony, and believe me, I do."

Then Blueblood looked over at Twilight. As it lasted longer, Twilight grew uncomfortable. "Got something on your mind?" she asked.

Blueblood blushed and turned away. "Sorry. I just... how do you and Flash keep a relationship going?"

Twilight frowned and looked out on the city. "We don't," she said. "We broke up a month ago. We realized we were from two different worlds, started thinking about the future, one thing led to another, and then it got awkward."

Blueblood frowned. "I'm sorry," he said.

"It's alright. I've accepted that we're not together anymore, I've just gotta' deal with the fallout."

Twilight laid her head on the balcony railing with a sad sigh. Blueblood raised a foreleg and reached towards Twilight, but he stopped, letting it hang in the air. Then Twilight moved next to him and he let his leg drop over her. Twilight didn't cry, but Blueblood could feel her sadness. The two looked out on the city for a long moment, both silent.

Finally, Blueblood got an idea. "Twilight," he asked, "how much more time are you spending in Canterlot?"

"Just the weekend," Twilight said.

"Well," Blueblood pulled back, "would you like to have lunch with me on Saturday, like we used to when you still lived here?"

Twilight looked over at him. He was gently smiling at her. "The original place has closed,"he continued, "but there's a new restaurant that serves high-class versions of common food. It's actually very delicious."

Twilight pursed her lips and hummed to herself. She gave no answer "I'll be on my medication," Blueblood promised, "although I don't know how much good that will do, given how long it takes to work. Besides, you need something to take your mind off of things. Who knows, a pretty mare like yourself could probably find a new special somepony."

"Blueblood," Twilight said, "I just got out of a relationship."

Blueblood shrugged. "Friendship then, unless you decide to take it in a different direction at some point down the line. Just focus on enjoying yourself."

"Blueblood?" Twilight asked, "are you asking me out on a date?"

Blueblood's eyes went wide. "Oh, no!" he said. "Not unless you wanted to, that is. Besides," he shifted on his hooves, "while you are a dear friend of mine and a wonderful mare, I'm not quite sure whether I'm really interested in you in that way or if I'm just trying to find someone good before they're all gone regardless of if they're right for me. I'm perfectly happy with being friends if that's what you want."

Twilight was silent for several moments. When Blueblood opened his mouth to speak, she stopped him and hummed some more. Eventually, she shrugged with a smile. "Well, I'm OK with hanging out with a friend," she told him, "but I only date nice guys."

Blueblood nodded. "I can do that." He started to slump. "Unless all this happens again."

"It won't," Twilight told him with a pat on the shoulder. "I'll make sure of that, and so will you. What's the name of the restaurant?"

Blueblood smiled. "The Laughing Brothers. There's no reservation requirement, so feel free to just come and find me when you get there."

Twilight nodded. "Got it."

"Good." Blueblood turned for the door. "Well, I'd better head downstairs before Aunt Celestia notices I'm gone. I'll see you on Saturday." Blueblood was just about to open the door, but stopped. "Oh, Twilight?"

"Yeah?"

Blueblood took a breath. "I never got to tell you this, but you make a good princess. Aunt Celestia chose well."

Twilight smiled. "Thanks."

Author's Note

OK, I have edited the earlier reference. It is now applicable. If you want to have political discourse, please use notes where possible.

So, this is it! My sequel project to The Early Life of Blueblood! This isn't in canon with that, except maybe this first chapter, if you like. If not, or if you haven't read my other story, then this can certainly stand on its own.

But, yeah, this is prettymuch how it's going to be for all of the following stories: alternative character interpretations + romantic pairing. Like a shippy, less forgiving version of Blueblood's Just Zis Guy, You Know, but hopefully without coming off as a rip-off.

Credit to The Great Derpsby for inspiring me to do this.

Twilight Sparkle and Blueblood the Convalescent (II)

Blueblood had a feeling this wasn't going to go well. The Laughing Brothers was a large wooden restaurant. It had been built on the edge of the Canterlot Cliff, with a balcony stretching out from the rock face over the edge of the cliff. To take advantage of this, the restaurant had a large number of windows all around, to take in the majestic and rustic view.

At least, it would if there was much of a view. The sky was entirely blotted out with clouds. It was only sprinkling, but the wind was already picking up something fierce, and each raindrop hit like a pebble out of a wood chipper. And off in the distance, Blueblood swore he could see flashes of lightning.

Prince Blueblood turned his thoughts back to himself. That morning, he'd showered, brushed his teeth, even put on a pair of slacks and a navy blue sweater. Even having done all of those, Blueblood still kept checking over his appearance. He smelled his breath, he fidgeted with his mane and his tail, and he even kept peeking between a mirror he'd laid on the bench and the watch right next to it. All the while, he was scowling at the whisper in his head.

"You overprepared," it told him. "You're still the jerk that broke her heart and pushed her into a date. She's five minutes late already for a reason. Do you honestly think this is going to go well?"

"Blueblood?"

Blueblood quickly straightened up. Twilight was walking forwards, undressed but clean. "Sorry I'm late," she said. "I got stuck behind a rescue crew."

Blueblood paused for a moment, but then put his hoof up. "That's alright," he told her.

Twilight frowned a little as she got closer. "Head still bothering you?" she asked.

Blueblood frowned at her, but then slowly nodded. "It'll be a while before my medicine actually gets to work again, but I'm picking up again." A moment later, though, he sighed. "Twilight, about the other day-"

Twilight just smiled in response. "It's OK, Blueblood," she said. "You're picking yourself up again."

"That's not what I meant." Blueblood turned away as his teeth gritted into a frown for a moment. After a deep breath, he turned back. "I didn't mean to pressure you into anything. If you're uncomfortable-"

"Then I spent the night with an old friend," Twilight told him. She was still smiling, but Blueblood could tell that she had stiffened up a little. Twilight quickly turned towards the restaurant. "Shall we?" she asked.

After a brief pause, Blueblood nodded, and started walking forwards the restaurant entrance. The collar on his sweater started to itch. Blueblood pulled at it, taking a quick look at Twilight, who noticed him. "You're very well dressed," she noted.

"Force of habit," he told her, the truth slipping out of him. "I attend a lot of events among the high-upper-class, and..." Blueblood paused for a moment to bite back a sigh. "I'm not well-regarded enough to go skyclad."

Twilight stared at him. "You're a prince."

Blueblood's frown turned into a scowl. "Tell them that. I don't have wings and I never will." His scowl suddenly suppressed itself as he got to the host's podium. "Two, please."

Blueblood could feel Twilight looking at him as the waiter walked the two over to their table. She briefly broke off staring at him to order her drink. Then the waiter left, and all the two could stare at was each other. Blueblood sighed. "Don't worry about it," he told her. "I've gotten used to it. How is everyone, by the way?"

Twilight paused before replying. "Everyone's fine," she replied. "Starlight's spending a day without magic, and Spike and Rainbow Dash are going hiking. Or at least they were." She looked out the window, which the rain had completely blurred. "So, anything new in your life?"

Blueblood shook his head. "Beyond my staring at the night sky, not a thing. I'm pretty much the same pony you left in Canterlot." His mouth remained open for a moment, but he stopped himself. "Anything interesting happen on your end?" he asked. "Besides Sombra, Tirek, Starlight, Chrysalis, and everything else in the news?"

Twilight nodded. "Yeah, lots," she said. "Just covering the basics, Spike became king of the dragons for about a minute, I've reconnected with some of my old friends... Oh! And the Cutie Mark Crusaders finally have their cutie marks. I trust you already know about Flurry Heart."

In the middle of a nod, Blueblood paused. "The Cutie Mark Crusaders," he mused. "How are they doing?"

"They're doing well." Twilight paused to chuckle. "They're actually getting along with Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon now. They even turned them around."

Now, Blueblood was smiling. "That's good to hear," he replied. "I take it you're the one Scootaloo got my name from?"

Twilight frowned. "She asked if I knew you," she said. "I said yes and gave her your personal address. She thought your letter was nice. It helped her put some things in perspective." Twilight sighed. "I wish you'd written to me. I know you regretted it by then."

Blueblood frowned at Twilight. "I couldn't. After... the letter, I just couldn't."

Before Twilight could say anything, a waitress walked up. "Hi," she chirped, "are you ready to order?"

Twilight nodded. "I think so," she said. After looking at Blueblood and getting a nod, she turned to her menu. "I think I'll try the... lapin gallois sounds-"

"That's made with cheese," Blueblood told her. "A lot of it."

"Ah," Twilight responded. "In that case, I think I'll have the crepes quarante-neuf."

"I'll have the soupe a l'oignon, sans fromage," Blueblood added, passing over his menu.

"Avec du fromage," Twilight corrected.

Once she had both menus in her teeth, the waitress left. "Thanks for the save," Twilight said.

"I didn't remember what cheese they used," he replied. "Their ice-cream is safe for you, though." He pulled a face. "Though not for me."

Twilight frowned at him for a moment. Blueblood frowned back. As the seconds ticked by, the air seemed to congeal. Finally, Twilight turned away. "You're going to lose her, idiot," the whisper told him. "She's going to give up on you unless you say something miraculous."

"Twilight! Fancy seeing you-"

Twilight and Blueblood looked up. Walking towards them was a white pony with an indigo mane that Blueblood instantly recognized. She seemed to recognize him, too, since Rarity had stopped talking and was just staring at him. "Rarity, hello," Twilight said, trying to smile. "What are you doing here?"

It took a moment before Rarity stopped staring and started to speak again. "Huh? Oh." She turned to Twilight. "I was just dropping in on the Canterlot boutique, seeing how Sassy Saddles was doing. Everything's going well."

Rarity took a quick look at Blueblood, but she quickly turned back to Twilight, who started to talk to her. Blueblood, meanwhile, had started to frown. On the one hand, she had pestered him for half a night, enamored entirely with the tabloid Prince Handicapped. On the other, she also seemed to be genuinely friendly to Twilight. Even if she'd known her before ascension, nothing seemed to have changed between them. Besides, he had made an ass of himself, to pardon the expression. Blueblood moved in.

"Rarity?"

Right as he called her name, Rarity stopped talking. She turned back very slowly, her face very neutral. Blueblood cleared his throat. "About the last time we met..." Briefly, Blueblood's lips pinched together.

"She's going to throw that back in your face. You know she hates you now, after that letter you wro-"

"I'm sorry for how I treated you. I should have been more direct instead of letting you suffer like that."

Rarity stared at him for a moment before she started up. "That's alright," she told Blueblood. "I have my own apology to offer. Twilight warned me that you wouldn't be interested, but I let myself get carried away regardless. I'm sorry about that."

After she'd stopped talking, Blueblood and Rarity stared at each other for a moment, silent. Then Rarity turned her head towards the doors. "Well, I think my date's arrived!" she announced. "It was nice seeing you here, Twilight. Your highness." She turned and bowed to Blueblood. "I'll leave you two alone now. Have a nice night together."

Before corrections could be issued, Rarity sped off. The two other ponies watched her go, then slowly turned back to each other. Instantly, Twilight peeked out a window. "So, uh," she remarked, "-looks like that storm's picking up. Man, it looks like a real gully-washer out there."

Suddenly, Blueblood snickered. Twilight turned back to him. "Hey," she remarked, "what's so funny?"

Blueblood started shaking his head. "Sorry," he said. "I'm sorry. I just never expected to hear you use the word 'gully-washer'."

This caused Twilight to smile a little. "That'd be Applejack," she said. "She's used the word a few times around me and I guess I picked it up."

Blueblood froze as he heard that name. Applejack. He'd seen her in the paper and he'd seen her in Twilight's photograph. But worst of all, he'd seen her in person. His heart fell. Twilight noticed and her smile fell. "Blueblood?" she asked. "What's the matter?"

"Twilight?"

Blueblood's head shot up in surprise. Applejack was standing right there staring at him and Twilight. "Applejack," Twilight said, strainedly smiling. "What are you doing here?"

With visible effort, Applejack turned to just face Twilight. "Well, Ah was just makin' a delivery," she said. "However, since the storm's popped up, Ah thought I'd stay here an' wait it out." She turned back to Blueblood for a moment. Instantly, a look came over her like she'd smelled milk beginning to spoil, and it was with great effort that she turned back to Twilight. "So, how's the stargazin' goin'?"

Twilight's smile was lessening as she answered. "Well, tonight's viewing has obviously been cancelled. I'm just reconnecting with someone." She motioned to Blueblood, but quickly continued the conversation.

As Twilight continued to talk, Blueblood's mouth pulled into a frown again. He stared at the table, but his mind kept going. "Applejack will tear you down. You saw how she looked at you. She would never accept your apology, and Twilight is going to wake up." Then Blueblood looked up. Twilight was looking at him, as was Applejack. For a moment, Blueblood's voice stuck in his throat. But he straightened up and opened his mouth.

"Applejack," he said. "I'm sorry for how I treated you at the Gala. I was... in a very bad mood. I shouldn't have taken it out on you, and I'm sorry."

Applejack's eyebrow rose a little and she frowned just a little. Blueblood stared at Applejack, waiting for her eventual response. Eventually, she bowed her head for a moment. "Thank you, yer highness," she said, cool as a cucumber. Then she turned back to the kitchen. "Well, Ah think Ah'll let you get back to talking to each other. The cook said he might've seen Flim and Flam in the area. Have a nice night."

Applejack smiled at Twilight, then turned back to the kitchen, looking at anyone but Blueblood as she walked away. Blueblood looked after her for a moment, then turned back to Twilight, frowning. Twilight frowned back. "What's that look for?" she asked.

Almost instantly, Blueblood sighed. "I'm sorry," he told her. "It's just..." His words stopped for a moment. "I was hoping we'd be alone tonight, so we could sort all of this out without... onlookers."

Twilight's frown tightened a little. "They're not onlookers," Twilight told Blueblood. She opened her mouth again, but then stopped herself, pulling her mouth into a more neutral face. "They're not going to spy on us," she assured him, "they're not going to do anything. Tonight is just the two of us catching up."

For several moments, Blueblood just frowned, slumped over the table. He glared in her direction for a moment but then started staring off into space. Eventually, a thunderclap caused him to look out the window. "I hope... that doesn't continue tomorrow," he said. "I'm looking forward to that transit."

Twilight was about to answer, but then the waitress came back with their food: a forty-niner crepe for Twilight and French Onion Soup with cheese for Blueblood. The two thanked her, then looked down at their plates for a moment. Neither of them moved. Then they looked up at each other. For a while, neither of them spoke a word. Then, however, Twilight cleared her throat. "So," she asked, "how is Princess Celesti-?"

Blueblood sighed, then turned a laser-like focus on her. "Twilight, let's get down to brass tacks, what do you think of me?"

Twilight froze. She faltered for a moment, trying to think of something. "Umm..." She straightened herself up. "Well, we're friends. We've known each other since elementary school..."

"No, no, no," Blueblood told her, "what do you think of me? I imagine you're still not too fond of me, given..." he paused to take a breath, "the things I said in my last letter, but we're here now, so it's a relationship you want to repair."

"Of course it is," Twilight said. Before Blueblood could say anything, she reached across the table and put her hooves in his. "Blueblood, you're the oldest friend I have. And yes, you've bugged the snot out of me over the years, but you've also been loyal and helpful. I'm here because you're my friend. I care about you."

"I know that," Blueblood told Twilight. He smiled at her very faintly. "And I'm glad." Then his smile faded. "I'm just worried that I'm feeling something that would strain that. Something you can't reciprocate."

In response, Twilight just smiled. "Blueblood, I promise that your having a crush on me won't drive me away. No matter what happens, we're still friends, and that will never change."

In spite of her answer, Blueblood was still and silent for a few moments. He twiddled his hooves after a moment. When Twilight moved to talk, Blueblood spoke up. "Twilight," he asked, "ha-oh, you have to be joking."

Twilight turned around as Blueblood scowled. Standing at the podium, waiting to be seated, was Fluttershy. She wasn't looking at anything in particular, and she didn't seem to have turned around to see the two at their table. "Well this is odd," Twilight remarked. "She isn't supposed to be here."

"So she says."

At that moment, Fluttershy noticed Twilight and, much to Blueblood's irritation, she walked over to their table. "Hello, Twilight," she said. "Fancy seeing you..."

As Fluttershy noticed him, her falling face made Blueblood aware that he was scowling as deep as he was. He immediately tried to smile, but the result only seemed to make her take a step back, so he stopped. "Fluttershy," Twilight said, "I didn't expect to see you here."

Fluttershy timidly turned away from Blueblood. "W-well," she said, "Dr. Fauna asked me to return a dog she'd finished treating a-and I decided to go hiki..." Then she turned back to Blueblood. "Have we met before?"

Trying to neutralize his face, Blueblood just shook his head. "Not as far as I know," he said. "Twilight's mentioned you a few times, though, and we were both at the recent Gala..."

Fluttershy's eyes widened a little. "Oh," she said, backing up a little. "That. I'm sorry about what I did that night. I don't really have an excuse, I was just..." After stalling for a moment, she fell silent with a blush. "I'm sorry."

Blueblood stared at Fluttershy, his frown almost softened away in a little bit of surprise. But then it started to sprout again. "Something is wrong. Something is waiting. You have forgotten something you did and Twilight is waiting to rub it in your face." After a few seconds of thought, though, nothing was coming to him.

He looked up at Twilight and noticed that she was frowning at him. Blueblood let the breath he'd been holding in, his heart sinking. "That's alright," he told Fluttershy, his voice soft and his mouth almost completely neutral. "I forgive you."

Slowly, eventually, Fluttershy nodded at Blueblood. "Thank you," she said. Then she turned to Twilight. "I-I'll leave you two alone now."

She walked off. Twilight gently let her go, then turned back to Blueblood, her eyebrows scrunched together and her lips turned slightly down. Blueblood's mouth shot open. "I didn- I'm not-" His throat shot out garbled gruntings for a few moments.

Then, Blueblood just stopped. He stared into nothingness for a moment. Then his hooves shot to his face and he slumped forwards. "This isn't working," he sighed. "I'm not ready for this. I should go home."

Twilight stopped glaring at him, then nodded. "That's OK," she said. "I'll get a to-go bag."

As Twilight looked for the waiter, Blueblood kept his head down on the table, taking deep, slow breaths. "Blueblood?" Twilight asked. "Would you like me to walk you home?"

Blueblood continued with his breaths as he held up his hoof. "Give me a moment," he said. "I'm not at my best."

Twilight nodded. "OK," she said. "Take all the time you need."

"TWILIGHT!"

Twilight's back straightened like a ramrod in the space of a second as Starlight Glimmer came pounding up. Before she could ask anything, Starlight had put her hooves up on the table. "There's a pony stuck on the cliffs!"

Twilight's eyes widened. "What?!"

Starlight continued unabated. "Yeah, he was testing some kind of flying device and it crashed halfway up the cliff! I need you to unlock my magic so I can-"

"Oh, this is ridiculous!"

With that, Blueblood sprung up from the table and stomped towards the door. Twilight instantly slid out after him. "Blueblood!"

Blueblood whipped around. "What?" he snapped. "Are you going ask me to do something nice for poor little Starlight here?" He glared over Twilight's shoulder. "Or as she called herself, Woeful Wisp?"

Starlight blushed. "Oh," she said. "I'm really sorry about that. I'll return that report on Monday."

"Thank you," Blueblood growled. "You do that."

He turned to leave again, but Twilight slipped in front of him. "Blueblood..."

"Twilight, shut up!" Blueblood then spun around and stomped the other way. "I just wanted a moment to reconnect with you. Just you! In private! Instead, you invited all of your friends along!"

Twilight followed after him, scowling. "No, I didn't!"

Blueblood whipped around. "Really? Then where did all of these ponies who look just like your friends come from?! Actually, don't answer that. Just bring the other two in so we can get this out of the way!" Then he turned around the restaurant. "You can come on out now!" he called out. "I know you're there, you might as well drop in!"

"SKYLIIIIIGHT!"

Before Blueblood knew it, he'd been tackled away by a pink blur, pushed into a set of tables. He saw nothing in the space of five seconds, but he heard something puff up, then the sound of glass shattering, and then something deflating. By the time he'd shaken his head and turned back around, things had changed.

The skylight now had a hole in it. Underneath it was a mound of glass and a deflating, cushion-shaped Pinkie Pie. The sight surprised him less than he'd thought it would. Then he noticed three other things that had literally dropped in. The first was a strange metal turbine attached to wings and making a dying whine. While obviously the cause of the crash (he forced his brain into silence), things two and three gave him a deeper sense of dread. Very carefully, minding the glass, he made his way forwards as Pinkie started to deflate back to a normal pony shape.

Rainbow Dash was the first to rise, stretching herself out and shaking herself. She was scratched, but she didn't seem to be bleeding all over the place, so Blueblood let Twilight take care of her. With a nervous swallow, he turned his head downwards. Spike was completely unharmed, and was just brushing glass off of himself. Finally, though, he looked up. "Blueblood," Spike stated. He didn't scowl; he didn't even frown. He just kind of stared at his older brother. "Did the skylight hit you?"

Blueblood was frozen in place for a moment before he shook his head. "Pinkie Pie knocked me out of the way," he said, his accent gone. "I take it you're-"

"Yeah, I'm fine," Spike said. "Dragon toughness and all."

"Good," Blueblood said. Then his eyebrows started to quirk downwards. "What were you doing?"

Spike sighed. "Flim and Flam thought they'd made something that would make them rich." He pointed to the device. "Dash and I stumbled on the rescue crew trying to pull them up. The recent rain meant that I was the only one they could send down after them. Then the rocket took off and Rainbow Dash tried to get it under control." Then Spike looked around. "What were you doing with everyone?"

Blueblood rolled his eyes. "It was just supposed to just be Twilight and me, but everyone else just... kind of showed up."

"Ah." Spike then turned back to Blueblood. "Apologizing for that letter, huh?"

"None of your business," Blueblood told Spike. Then he started. "And how did you-"

"She burned it in front of me." Spike started frowning at Blueblood. "Blueblood, are you alright?"

"I don't want to talk about it," Blueblood snapped. "And it doesn't concern you."

"I haven't heard from you in two years!" Spike snapped. "That concerns me!"

"Well, I'm fine, so DROP IT!"

All of a sudden, the flying device started to whine and whine loudly. Then it started to wobble. Blueblood heard someone shout a warning. In the space of a second, his foreleg had swept around Spike and lifted him up to his mouth. Blueblood's teeth firmly bit down on the scruff of Spike's neck. Then Blueblood leapt into a booth, instantly curling around his little brother. For the longest time, he was completely still.

Then the sound died. As Spike tried to get up, Blueblood pushed him back down. A few long seconds later, somepony poked him. "It's OK," Twilight said. "I turned it into a flower."

Slowly, Blueblood uncurled himself and got up. Sure enough, where the device was a few moments ago, there was only a tall rose growing from the floor. As Blueblood watched, it then made a high-pitched whine. It launched into the air like a firework before exploding into a shower of petals. Then Blueblood turned back to Spike, who had already gotten back on his feet. "Are you-"

Spike nodded. "Yeah, I'm OK," he said.

"Well, that was pointless. And look at everyone else." Blueblood did so. None of Twilight's friends had even moved; they were just looking at Blueblood. "They are heroes. You just dove for cover. What a figure you're cutting tonight."

Blueblood's lips pinched together in a frown, his eyes closing as he tried to breathe deeply. After a few moments, his chest slowly stopped burning, and his throat started to loosen. Still, it took a few seconds for him to get ready to talk. He finally cleared his throat. "E-hem. Yes, well, thank you," he told Twilight. He then started looking around. "Well, it looks like everything is going to be alright. I'm fairly sure that the restaurant's insurance should cover this nicely and the police should have enough testimonies from everyone, so I'm going to go home."

He could feel Spike tugging on his back leg, but Blueblood just pulled himself out of the booth. With a bow and a quick, almost curt good-night to Twilight, he started walking towards the door. He could feel the other ponies staring at him, but he tried to ignore it.

"What's up with him?"

At Rainbow Dash's sotto voce remark, Blueblood stopped, taking a deep breath. As he lifted his hoof to proceed, though, he heard Twilight talk. "He's just had a bad couple of days," she told Rainbow Dash. "You know what politicians can be like: pushy, unreasonable."

Blueblood turned around. The other ponies were looking at Twilight, several eyebrows higher than they should be if they believed her. Then Spike stepped forwards. "She's telling the truth," he said, "his job tends to wind him up a lot. He's a lot better when he's had a few days to relax."

Blueblood's first emotion was a blot of surprise. "Why didn't they tell? You know they hate you right now, why are they lying?" Then Pinkie Pie started to blurt out a question, but Rainbow Dash plugged up her mouth. Even then, Blueblood could see that all of the other ponies looked incredulous as they looked at each other. It didn't surprise him the slightest when Applejack very skeptically said she trusted Twilight. Blueblood noticed Twilight frowning, and his next course of action fell into place.

"There's more to it than that," he announced. He walked back to the booth, standing an equidistance from the other mares. The sight of six practical strangers staring at him drove his planned speech back into him, but he took another deep breath and brought it back up. "The truth is I'm... I have a mood disorder. I thought I could handle it at the Gala those years ago, and recently, but I was wrong, and I wound up driving Twilight away. I met her again yesterday, and I invited her here to rebuild our old friendship." Then he turned to Twilight and Spike. "Thank you both for trying to keep my condition secret." Then he turned back to the others. "I hope I can gain your trust, but tonight's left my mood stretched, so I'm going to go home." Then he bowed, bid them good-night, and turned towards the door.

"Blueblood!"

Blueblood stopped as Twilight walked up. "Your doggie bag," she told him.

Blueblood frowned as he thought, then shook his head. "I'd rather not wait," he said, "and I think the waitstaff is occupied."

"Well, is it alright if I walk you home?"

Bluebood took a look back at the others. Their faces hadn't changed. He looked over at Spike, who gave him a quick nod before striking up a conversation with Twilight's friends. Then Blueblood turned back to Twilight and nodded. She kept to his shoulder as they walked out of the restaurant and into the much-lessened rain. Still, Twilight magicked up an umbrella to cover both of them. After a moment, Blueblood looked over at her "thank you."

"Don't mention it," she said.

The two walked onwards. For a few seconds, the two just looked forwards. Then Blueblood stole a glance at Twilight, and she turned back to him. No words were exchanged, they just looked at each other. Finally Twilight spoke up. "So," she started, "you asked me if I'd ever thought about you that way. I did, once."

Blueblood stumbled for a moment as his heart skipped a beat. He paused for a moment, visually asking Twilight to say more. As she opened her mouth, though, his jaw dropped open for a moment. Then he smiled. "Right after my growth spurt?" he asked.

Twilight smiled back as she nodded. "Me and every other girl in class," she said. "It only lasted a moment, though."

Blueblood nodded as his smile became more strained. "Until I opened my mouth, I take it," he said. "I really was a jerk to you back then."

"You were getting better," Twilight told him. "Right before I left for Ponyville. You want to do that again?"

Blueblood started nodding before he stopped. "Maybe a little later," he said. "Once my emotions have calmed themselves down."

"Don't worry," Twilight said. "Next time, it'll just be the two of us."

Author's Note

So, this thing's finally out. I stopped and started a lot on it, huh? I apologize for that. But, here it is now. I wish I could say the next chapter is going to come out faster, but I have a job at the moment (which I hope lasts a good long time), and I have a few other things to do as well, so I'm not making any promises. Hopefully, though, this job means that I'll be able to fix myself a little so that I can stick to a schedule better. As always, comments are welcome! Next time, back to Pinkie Pie!

Blueblood the Pariah - Fluttershy

Author's Note

So, yeah. This took a while. Those of you who read my blog post (thank you Shigawan for replying) know that my original plan (which featured Applejack) is being postponed at least until the end of the first round of fics. Trust me when I say that when you see it, you'll see why. Thus, you have this being released instead.

Also, before I start, I just want to say that I have personal experience with this sort of thing. Very personal. Personally personal. I've changed a few things around from my own experience, since there's no one model for it, but I have been through a lot of this. Just bear that in mind and if there's something wrong, please forgive me. Comments are welcome, and hopefully the next chapter won't take so long.

Blueblood the Pariah - Fluttershy

It's a nice day. I'm serious, this is one of the best days of the year. I've got to remember to complement the weather team later. There has simply been no better day this year to go out into the Royal Gardens and admire the animals than this one. Provided said animals don't get too close. I love them, but there's no telling what they've picked up in their travels. Kind of ironic given that my cutie mark involves travel in uncharted lands.

I am Prince Blueblood, President of the Equestrian Exploration Society. I've got an awesome airship and I have my name on more Equestrian Exploration news articles than I can count, with discoveries that earned me the title of Prince. I am possibly the greatest thing a pony can aspire to shy of being made an alicorn. Or somepony who can hold a conversation. That would be nice for me to have. Especially with the mare in the garden.

Oh, she's the most beautiful thing I've ever seen in my life! She's gorgeous; long mane and legs. And she's so gentle with the animals. I... I think I like her.

No. No, I'm not the romantic type, not after last time. Besides that monkey just ran from her. I imagine he's got a good reason not to like her. But she seems so gentle. Maybe if I spoke to her, I could... no. I'm not that kind of talker. I'm the kind of pony that knows how to classify moths blindfolded. I'm not a talker. I'll just screw it up and ... oh Celestia, she's crying. I've got to do something.

"Are you alright?"

Rats, I should've dropped the accent. Too late, she's seen me. I already regret this, I'm going to make this worse. She's wiping her eyes. "Oh, yes. I-I'm OK."

There you go, it was nothing. I know she was crying, but she probably just got something in her eye. But then, why would she be slumped over like that? Ugh, never mind. She doesn't want me to talk to her. Unless she needs to talk to someone but just doesn't want to admit it. Why don't ponies just say what's on their minds? I turn my head away, but I force myself to turn back. "You're sure?"

She's frowning, but her eyebrows haven't gone down. I guess that's-

She sighs. "No. But I don't want to talk about it."

"Why not?" I ask before I can stop myself. She turns away. "It's OK," I say. I've got to lighten the mood. OK, something funny, something too extreme to be real. "I mean, it isn't as if you stampeded the animals through the castle."

She sobs and I hate myself. Of course I mess up a joke. But why did the joke fail? Did she actually do that? Oh don't be silly. There's no way that she could do tha... wait a minute.

Now I remember her! She was that nutcase a few months ago that drove the animals through the Gala! No wonder they hate her! And she thought she could actually talk to these creatures again? Why...

...I should know better. She seems to regret what she's done. Unless she's- no. I've been accused of being insincere a lot; I'm not doing that to anypony else.

I kneel down next to her. "What happened?" I ask, hoping my tone is right. "I mean, why did you..." I stop. Should I mention it?

The mare does nothing, and then she continues to do nothing. Maybe I should prompt her? "It's alright," I tell her. "I've done plenty of stupid things myself. I promise I'll hear you out."

She looks over at me and I sincerely hope that my face is right. Finally, after a long wait, she talks. "I run an animal shelter," she says. "I'm also a veterinarian, so I often have to practice emergency medicine on some of the animals I find. The week before the Gala, I found a gosling that was very sick. I did my best, and it looked like he'd recovered..." She swallows again. "I know now that I couldn't have done anything, but I'd gotten attached to him and... it really hurt."

Ah. "I'm sorry."

"I was sure I could handle myself by the time the Gala came around, but when things didn't turn like I'd hoped... well, you know what happened." She sniffles and turns away from me. "I'm sorry. I just wanted something to go right that week. But I just wound up doing everything wrong. Just like now."

I try to put my hoof over her, but she shies away. Wait, why wouldn't she? Oh no, she's starting to cry again! What do I say? "I understand!" Wait, that sounded wrong. "I understand. It's alright." I smile. "When my father..." Wait, should I be mentioning this?

She looks up at me. "Oh, I'm sorry."

That's a no. I need to get the conversation off of me. "Don't worry, it was months ago. How are you feeling?"

She pauses. "I'm better now," she says. "I only needed a little time to recover." Her frown deepens. "I really shouldn't have gotten attached though. That was very unprofessional of me, and I was so pushy with poor Gil and Angel." She winces. "Especially Gil."

I shrug. "Well, if you thought he was healed, then I don't think you were wrong in getting attached."

She doesn't say anything. As she continues to say nothing, I begin to worry about saying something. "Everypony makes mistakes and everypony has moments where their feelings take point over what they should have done. I don't blame you for either of those."

Still nothing, but her frown has softened. "Would you like me to help you with the animals?" I ask.

"No, it's OK." She sighs. "I imagine they don't want to talk to me."

"It was just a temporary thing," Blueblood said. "If I vouch for you, I'm certain they'll trust me."

Wait, that sounded stupid. Given that incredulous look she's giving me, it probably was stupid. "Well, what if I start with an animal that's new here? One that doesn't know you yet?"

She's silent for a few seconds. I give her silence to let her think. Finally, she nods. "That would be nice."

My heart lifts. I know the perfect creature and I call. Soon, a kookaburra comes flying in. He just arrived from the San Diecolt Zoo so he should... no, no, STOP!

I accidentally scream that last part out loud, but Kingsley stops right in front of my hooves. I motion to the mare. He looks at her, then looks back at me. I motion at her more firmly. Finally, Kingsley hops over to her.

She stares at Kingsley for a moment before she clears her throat. "Uh, h-hello," she says. "M-my name's Fluttershy. I'm guessing you know that I was here a few months ago, on the night of the Grand Galloping Gala. I'm sorry for the way I behaved last night, and I would really like to make amends. It's alright, you can trust me now. I promise."

Kingsley looks at her, then back at me. I motion for him to move closer. He stares at her for a while, but he comes within range. Slowly, she reaches out her hoof. Kingsley looks into her wide eyes.

And then he flies away.

I can see Fluttershy start to cry, but she holds it in. "Are you alright?" I ask.

Slowly, she nods. "I'll be fine. I just..." A tear falls down her cheek and she goes quiet again for a while. I try to think of something to say, but she beats me to the punch. "Is that giant hogweed?!"

I look over where she's looking and after a moment, I spot what she's talking about. "Garden angelica," I say, walking over to it. "Also known as Angelica archangelica, wild celery, and Holy Ghost. The gardener planted them to try and attract local insects that the animals here eat. That's actually how we found out that lacewings are very fond of-" I stop myself. "I'm sorry. Am I boring you?"

Fluttershy shakes her head. "Oh, no. Not at all."

Wait, she works with animals. Why would she be bored? "It's also used in the kitchens, and it's one of my favorite ingredients." I take a bite out of it and chew it over. Then I remember and I swallow quickly. "I'm sorry, did you want some?"

She shakes her head. "No, thank you. Do you grow arugula?"

I wince. "Yes, never could stand the stuff." I stick my tongue out. Then I remember that's rude and put it back in my mouth. "I'm sorry."

Fluttershy looks at me. "For what?"

I sigh. "...never mind." I look like an idiot.

Fluttershy smiles. "It's OK. At least you're apologizing for what you don't need to instead of not apologizing for something you should."

"I'd prefer to do neither." I groan with my face in my hooves. "I'm absolutely hopeless with people. Can you imagine what I'd be like with a girlfriend? Pfft, I have no interest in torturing somepony like that."

I take my hooves off my eyes and realize that, once again, I've said something stupid. Fluttershy's eyes are watering. I open my mouth, but I shut it again. Finally, I open my mouth again. "Fluttershy, I-"

"No, it's OK." She wipes her eyes.

"What's wrong?" I ask.

She sniffles a few more times, but eventually she answers. "I just got out of a relationship," she says. "He was a good stallion, and we broke up very peacefully, but we just grew apart." She looks at me. "I didn't mean to take what you said so badly. I know you didn't mean to insult me. It's just, you're colored just like him, and I couldn't help thinking of him. I'm sorry."

She wipes her eyes some more, but she's still slouched over. I try to think of a way to cheer her up, putting that negative voice in my head aside. I want to help her. If she has a problem with how I look, maybe if I try to look different in a silly way, she'd laugh? I look around. There's flowers, that won't do. I'm not letting animals sit on me. Then I see... no. No, no, no. I refuse to consider it. There's no way...

...well, no. There's one way. Two, if I count making up for the Gala. So, I walk up to the mud puddle from the recent rain and...

SPLORP!

She turns around as I start rolling around. I rub some mud into my face and mane with my hooves, forcing down my revulsion. 'It's just mud', I keep telling myself. 'Dirt and water. You can wash it off later.' Finally, I stand, and with an effort, I smile. "How do I look now?"

Her chuckling is wonderful, and my soul soars. I, the mass murderer of the art of conversation, have made somepony laugh. I even forget that I'm covered in mud. "You look filthy," she says. She smiles at me. "Thank you."

"My pleasure."

"You know, I don't believe I caught your name."

"It's Blueblood. Prince Blueblood."

My daydream bursts as her smile vanishes. "What is i-" Wait, no. My heart sinks. It has to be the Gala. I haven't done anything else that bad.

She doesn't glare at me, but I can see her eyes narrow just a little. "Your highness," she says in a cooler tone than before, "do you remember a mare named Rarity?"

Oh, no. "White? Purple mane shaped like this?"

"Indigo, actually, but yes. She's a friend of mine, and you were a bit of a jerk to her."

I can feel my joy collapse in on itself. "I know, and I'm sorry."

"Why?"

Why doesn't matter. I've tried to say why, but nopony ever believes me. I don't really blame them: my explanation of one event is too many peoples' chronic excuse. "It doesn't matter." I turn away from her back towards the castle. "Good luck with the animals."

I walk off, resolving to take a shower, but she's in front of me again. "You can tell me," she says. "I promise I'll hear you out."

I look at her again. She looks sincere, but I don't know if that'll continue. If she really wants to know, though... I take a breath. "There's something... different about my brain," I say. "It has its benefits, but it also causes me a lot of headaches. It gets worse when I'm stressed out, and the Gala came at a very stressful point in my life."

"Your father?" Fluttershy asks.

"He died in surgery two weeks before the event. Furthermore, I was named Prince and President of the Equestrian Exploration Society around the same time and I was still trying to settle into my two roles. Also, I've always hated crowds. I still can't filter sounds well, so it can be hard to hear anyone I talk to. I usually try to stay out of the way."

"Rarity said you invited her over."

I'm sure I'm turning pink right now. "Well, I didn't intend to. Part of my problem is that I sometimes act out daydreams, and I didn't have the heart to tell her I was flirting with a mare that didn't exist. If you're going to ask about the rose in my mouth, I'd already spat that out and I thought she wouldn't want it."

"What about the rose on the bush?"

"I didn't realize she wanted it. I just heard her complement it, and I decided that it would look good in my lapel. The same thing goes for the cushion: it was there, so I sat down. Again, when I'm under stress, I tend to forget my finer manners. I didn't mean to steal them from her. And I also didn't mean to dominate our conversations when I did."

I'm about to continue, but I catch myself. Fluttershy's face hasn't changed. "What about the puddle?" she asks. "Why didn't you put your coat over it?"

I'm confused. "I don't wear coats. They're too itchy. I was just wearing a lapel that night. Did she think I had a coat on?"

Fluttershy nods. "She was kind of confused after the Gala. What about Applejack's fritters? You made Rarity pay for something, and then you insulted it."

"Well, I have a problem with-" Wait, how does she know the name of the food cart pony? Was I a jerk to two of her friends that night? Ugh, wonderful. "It's called theory of mind, and it's the concept that other people don't think as you do. At the Gala, I thought she was aware I didn't have any money on me, being without clothing and thus without pockets, and at an event with a free buffet."

"That doesn't explain why you spat it out and insulted it."

She doesn't quite look like I have lobsters crawling out of my ears, but she's getting there. "It was the texture. Ponies like me have issues with texture as much as they have issues with taste, and some of our senses are far too sensitive. I spat it out because it felt funny to me. Then I remembered what a fritter was, and I tried to save face with the snobs. It was for the same reason that I made Rarity open a door for me. Well, that and I was tired and my temper was shortening. Please tell both of them I'm extremely sorry. I don't know their addresses."

She nods. "I will. And I suppose the cake was because..."

"I'm a neat freak. When I'm in the field, I go to greater measures than others to keep clean. That night, I was unable to keep that part of me under control. Is there anything I missed?"

Fluttershy shakes her head. "No, I think you've explained everything." I see something flash across her face. "Forgive me, your highness, but do you have-"

I nod. "It's more severe than average, but yes, I have high-functioning autism. I can make eye contact, but I have a lot of other problems. And the night of the Gala was when all of them decided to surface at once." I sigh as I slump forward. "I have them back under control now, but now everypony thinks that's who I am all the time. And I just don't care anymore."

I lay on the grass. I don't feel any relief from having brought all this up again. I know better than to hope for that. Now she's going to say-

"I believe you."

Not what I was thinking. I look up and see Fluttershy lying on the grass and smiling at me. "I read a lot of your articles when you went in the field, and you were actually one of my favorite writers. While I was disappointed after the Gala, you've shown me a better pony today, and I believe your behavior to Rarity was a fluke. I forgive you."

This makes me smile, and it takes me a moment to find my voice. "Thank you." Something occurs to me. "Wait, why didn't you recognize me? My photo was in the magazine when I was made President."

Her small drops a little. "It wasn't on the cover and I was... preoccupied that month, so I just never got around to reading it." She smiles again. "What was in it?"

I'm about to answer when I remember something pressing. "Perhaps I can show you in the library in a few minutes? I'm starting to uncontrollably desire a shower."

She chuckles as we get up. "I'll be there."

Blueblood the Tentative - Fluttershy II

The clouds are grey when my train pulls in. I get up and I carefully dust myself off before I get off the train. There are only a few ponies getting off with me at Ponyville and I was lucky enough to get my own compartment, so the noise and crowds aren’t too bad, although my side is still itching under my bandages. I reach into my satchel, only to find that while I remembered the flower, I’ve forgotten my umbrella.

Typical Blueblood. My first date ever and we’re both going to be rained on. What else could go wro- darnit.

“Hi there!”

I jump and spin around. Standing behind me with the biggest grin on her face is the pinkest pony I’ve ever seen. “I’ve never seen your face before! Who are ya’, stranger?”

The prevailing urge in my head is to run before this mare wears down my sense of sociability, but I remember my manners. “I’m Prince Blueblood,” I tell her.

She gasps. “Oh my gosh,” she says. Instantly I think that she knows Rarity and Fluttershy together. Between those two, I have no idea what her response-she zooms into my face. “You’re the guy Fluttershy got a crush on three weeks ago!”

I leap back. “Please don’t do that,” I ask.

Realization dawns on her. “Oh.” She smiles sheepishly. “Sorry.”

“That’s alright,” I respond out of habit.

“I was just so excited to meet you,” the pink one continues. “Fluttershy came back from Canterlot so incredibly happy, I assumed she’d mended fences with the animals at the castle, but she said that didn’t happen. Then, at our weekly spa meeting, Rarity realized she’d met somepony she had a crush on, but Fluttershy completely clammed up, so that told me that that somepony was somepony we didn’t like and wasn’t dumped on her by the princess! Combining the list of single stallions we don’t like combined with the stallions that live in Canterlot that we don’t like left you!” She leans in right next to my ear. “Don’t worry,” she whispers, “I don’t think anypony else’s figured it out yet, so her secret’s safe.”

Aunt Celestia, I beg you, let this pony have a… wait, Fluttershy has a crush on me? Excellent! I don’t have to wor… wait, she didn’t even tell them she was interested in me. OK, if our positions were reversed, I wouldn’t be too excited about it either, but… no, I don’t blame her. We were just friends when we parted, after all.

“Where can I find her?” I ask.

“Normally, she’s in her cottage,” Pinkazoid continues. “I can-“

“That’s alright,” I tell her. “Directions will be fine.”

Her face falls and I feel guilty, but Pinkazoid perks back up in a moment. “Just go down this road ‘til you get to the bridge,” she tells me.

“Thank you,” I say. I start to wa-

“WAIT!” I stop and regretfully turn around. “I know you’re not moving here, so I can’t throw you a proper ‘Welcome to Ponyville’ party just yet, but I can give you a ‘Hope You Have Fun Here,’ mini-shindig!”

<*>

I get all the confetti out of my mane just as I reach the bridge. Across it is a house that I guess is her cottage. It doesn’t feel right, though. I always picture cottages as being smaller. However, I could be wrong: I’ve never looked up precisely what a cottage is. Regardless, I cross the river and walk up to her door. With some hesitation, I knock.

A rabbit answers the door with a frown. I’m not surprised by the sentient bunny; I’ve seen it before. “Hello,” I say. “I’m looking for Fluttershy. Have you seen her?”

The rabbit’s eyes widen, then his scowl deepens. She seems to have told her animals about me, at least. He points to my right and I look over. “The forest?” I ask him. I remember to turn my head back, since he can’t say anything, but the door slams in my face. “Thanks,” I mumble. Then I find a nice place on the ground to sit and I wait on the doorstep.

Several minutes go by and I don’t see Fluttershy. Should I go back into to- no. I might miss her, or I might encounter somepony else. Somepony who isn’t as open to the idea of me seeing her. Or worse, one of the ponies who openly hates me. And thus, I start naming families of beetles and their individual characteristics. After fifteen minutes, I stop, bored.

Then it occurs to me that I’m about to do something I’ve never done before, and that I should probably practice. Then I remember that I’ve read nothing about asking someone out. But whatever, I’ve seen several movies that involve a couple getting together; I can extrapolate. Even weeding out the crash-into-get-togethers, I still have something to work with. But what if the rest are just longer versions of sleezy pick-up lines that no mare would ever believe? Then I remember my mom’s advice: just be honest. I take a few deep breaths, and I start composing.

“Fluttershy,” I say, “you are beautiful. Not just in body, but in personality. You are gentle and forgiving, and I find myself attra-“ ‘I find myself’? Really? Start over.

“Fluttershy, I am in lo- I believe I have a crush-“ No. Don’t be so forward. If she doesn’t feel the same way, it’ll just be awkward, and you really need friends outside of your office. Try again.

After a few seconds, nothing’s coming to mind. I try to fish for poetic imagery, but it just sounds cheesy. I try to elaborate, but I just feel like I’m sounding desperate. Finally, I decide to try for something simple. “Fluttershy, will you go out with me?” There, that should do it, I hope. Just raise the volume a little. “Fluttershy, will you go out with me?” Better, but be less jittery. “Fluttershy-“

“Blueblood?”

I feel like I’ve been dunked in a snow-cloud. After leaping a foot in the air, I whip around. Right behind me is Fluttershy, and next to her is that little jerk of a bunny laughing his fluffy little tail off. “Y-yes?” I ask. “When did you get here? Uh-”

“Just now,” she says. “Angel here came to get me fifteen minutes ago.” She’s blushing. “I, uh, I heard everything. I just couldn’t think of how to interrupt you.”

My heart sinks. “Ah,” I say.

She smiles at me. “And yes, I would love to go out with you.”

My heart shoots back up. “Thank you!” I cry out. “I mean,” I reign in my enthusiasm, “thank you.”

She giggles. “You’re welcome.”

“Anywhere you had in mind? I’m sort of new to the area and I don’t want to drag you back to Canterlot.”

“I know a few places,” she says. “Was there anything you wanted?”

“I’m fine with anything,” I say. I’m personally yearning for something sweet, but she might not.

“You’re sure?” she asks.

OK, is that an invitation to suggest something or is she just being polite? Come to think of it, she seems a little more reserved than when we met last time. Well, regardless, I decide to take the plunge. “Is there a bakery anywhere near here?” I ask.

She nods. “The best is Sugarcube Corner. It’s one of my favorite places to eat.”

Thank goodness we agree. “Sounds good,” I say. “Lead the way.”

We walk off, Angel frowning at me, but hopping off and letting us be. Unless he’s preparing to do something evil very quickly. I put my mind off of that, but I keep a part of my attention focused backwards.

“Blueblood?” Fluttershy asks me.

“Yes?”

“Well, I just wanted to apologize for… being so forward the last time we met.”

“That’s alright,” I say.

“It’s just, I really like your work and I really wanted to like you. Well, that and we had a high spore count that day.”

That last noun catches my attention. “Spore count?” I ask.

Fluttershy nods. “Ponyville is right next to a large patch of Poison Joke. Their spores tend to have-“

“Persona- sorry.”

“Personality-altering effects, yes,” she finishes. “Don’t worry, it should be a low-spore day today.”

I can feel the spores in my lungs already, like little spider eggs fluttering around. Then the 'personality-altering' part catches up to me. Already, I can feel my emotions playing closer to the top of my head! That odd smell wafting down the street of town, what if I start heaving? What if an odd chewing noise causes me to start screaming at the top of my lungs? I smack myself. "Relax," I mutter to myself. "If you imagine bad thi-"

“Ah, Fluttershy, I-“

I recognize her voice right as I see her. Rarity drops several bolts of what look like very nice fabric as she sees me. “YOU!”

She storms over to me. Memories of her shaking cake onto me fill my head and I realize she can probably make mud quite easily. I back away, eyes wide, babbling out “I’m sorry!”

“Rarity,” Fluttershy says, “As you know, this is-"

"PRINCE! BLUEBLOOD!" Rarity shrieks.

"I'm sorry," I mumble.

"What are you doing here?" she asks.

Fluttershy stands between us. "He's taking me on a date," she says.

"WHAT?!"

I look up. Falling out of the sky is a blue mare with a rainbow mane and wide-eyed anger on her face. "Tell me you're kidding," she tells Fluttershy as she lands. "You're seriously going on a date with this pompous snob?"

I take a step back, but Fluttershy stays where she is. "Yes, Rainbow Dash, I am," she says.

"Why?" Rainbow Dash asks.

"Remember that stallion I mentioned last week?" Fluttershy replies.

Rarity starts. "I didn't think you were talking about..." She motions to me. "That!"

I frown. I know this will end badly, I should just leave and get it over with.

"He was a very different person when I saw him," Fluttershy says. "And even if he was leading me on, don't you think after Discord that I can handle myself?"

This silences them. The two look at each other, then glare at me. I want to reassure them, but I keep my mouth shut: they wouldn't believe me anyway. Finally, they turn back to Fluttershy. "Very well, Fluttershy," Rarity says. "Your heart is your business, and we will leave you to it. Come, Rainbow Dash. Let's give the two lovebirds some space."

Rarity walks off. Rainbow Dash looks back at Fluttershy, then back at me, then walks off after Rarity. Fluttershy turns to me. "You OK?" she asks.

My face reddens as I realize I've let Fluttershy fight this battle. I can't think of anything to do, but I feel like I should've done something. I force the thought of spores out of my mind: I’ve always been… cautious. "I'm OK," I say. I hear something and I look over the way the two ponies went. “They’re watching us,” I say.

Fluttershy frowns. “They won’t do anything,” she says. “They’re just curious.”

My frown deepens. “Shall we keep going before-“

"Howdy, Fluttershy."

A passing orange pony in a stetson with a wagon catches my eye. Then she stops. Then she turns around, frown in place. I smile nervously, she turns to Fluttershy. "Fluttershy?" she asks as she motions to me. "Care t' explain?"

"He's with me, Applejack," Fluttershy says.

Applejack (or as I remember her, the food cart pony) turns back to me, eyebrow cocked. "I'm sorry about the night of the Gala," I say, hoping my words aren't coming out too easily. "Your fritters were actually quite delicious." I stumble over the word briefly, but that part’s true and her frown doesn't tell me if she noticed, even if her eye contact is starting to scare me. "I just..." I stop myself from making an excuse. Then the urge to explain myself takes over. "I wasn’t allowed to say anything in their company."

Applejack keeps frowning at me, then looks at Fluttershy. Then Applejack smiles. "Ah know what ya' mean,” she tells me. “Ah spent time in Manehattan high society. Celestia bless mah Aunt an’ Uncle Orange, but Ah hated it there." She turned to Fluttershy. “Ah take it he’s th’ guy ya’ met in Canterlot?”

Fluttershy blushes, but nods. “He is.”

“Hm. He seems nice enough.”

“Yes,” Fluttershy says. “He was just having a bad night that night.”

"If ya' say so, sugarcube." She smiles at me. "Where y'all headed?"

"Umm, I think it's called Sugarcube Corner."

"Excellent!" Applejack just beams at me. "Let me buy ya' the first round o' treats."

The two walk into a nearby building. I walk up to the steps, but I hear ponies inside. They’re loud, at least for me. “Maybe we can eat outside?” I suggest.

Applejack’s staring at me and Fluttershy looks a little uncomfortable. “You sure about that?” Applejack asks. “It’s s’posed t’ start rainin’ any second now.”

The joke speeds out of my mouth. “Please,” I snort. “When has the weather department been on ti-”

I’m glad I’m not the only pony who jumped at the lightning, but I’m the only one getting wet. “One o’clock!” Rainbow Dash calls. “Right. On. Time.”

Oh. Right. That’s one of her friends I’m insulting. I’m embarrassing myself and Fluttershy and my bandages are getting wet. I should just cut my losses and run. Who knows what the spores... no. I won’t. That would hurt Fluttershy’s feelings. I stand there for a moment, pondering whether being wet and cold trumps being overloaded. Then a wind picks up and I march inside.

Thankfully, the place is still relatively quiet, in that I can point my ears and hear with effort. Maybe if we eat quickly, I-sorry, we- can get out before it starts getting loud. Unless Fluttershy lingers to talk. Please don’t linger, Fluttershy. Fluttershy vouches for a window seat a small distance away from the door, close, but away from the wind. I smile at her, then we sit.

“Hi guys!”

Darnit. “Hey Pinkie,” Applejack says. “Three apple fritters on me.”

Darnit. “Comin’ right up!” Pinkie bursts. I open my mouth. “Here ya’ go!” Pinkie doles out three apple fritters, then speeds off.

“Thanks, Applejack,” Fluttershy says. Then she starts eating.

I look at the fritter. There is no liquid on the table of any kind. I look up; Applejack is looking right at me. She’s smiling, but it doesn’t quite meet her eyes. She’s daring me. Right as she opens her mouth, I put the thing in my mouth and bite down.

I barely keep from spitting it out. Ugh, the outside feels so crunchy! This is what normal ponies call crisp? This is pumice! And they’ve got little pieces of stuff in them, like I’m eating pebbles! I can feel my face contracting: my cover’s blown. With the greatest of effort, I swallow. I look at her with a smile and she smiles back. “So, did ya’ OMIGOSH!”

I’m distracted by Pinkie going off behind me. What did Applejack say? I want to say ‘like it’ but what if she meant ‘hate it’? OK, yes and no are out; be certain. “It’s good,” I say.

“D’ya Daddyyyyy!”

A little brat’s whining distracts me. The place is starting to fill up and the noise is becoming irritating. I still have to deal with Applejack, though. “I’ll finish this first,” I say, swiveling my ears around.

Thank Celestia I seem to have got it right because Applejack nods with a more eye-reaching smile. “Well, ye’r polite, Ah’ll give ya’ that.” Good, I’m in her good graces. She turns to Fluttershy. “crunchcruchcruchcrucnch go. Thank th’ beavers MUFFINS!”

Wait, what did she say? “I will,” Fluttershy says.

“Wait,” I say. “Beavers?”

“Yeah,” Applejack says. “Fluttershy spoke to them and they a-snerrrt take down the dead trees.”

I think I got this. “And you don’t have to worry about flooding?” I ask.

“Once,” Fluttershy admits, “but that’s been taken care of. How are the vampire fruit bats?”

Applejack frowns. “They’ve been scraaaaaape outside their part o’ th’ orchard again. Ah found two more SLAM! drained dry this mornin’ an’ Winona’s goin’ up th’ gulp, gulp, gulp, gulp, clunk! gonna’ have a bit of a crunch on our hands come October.”

“I actually think I can help with that,” I say. “Vampire fruit bats don’t like things that make noise and move, like wind chimes. Certain preserves have started using spells that simulate that across a boundary line, so that bats turn back when they cross it. If you want, I can cast it for you.”

She’s giving me an odd look, probably because I’m a little too loud. “snerrrt great. Thanks.”

“You’re welcome. Anything else I can help you with?” Poor choice of words. “How is everything besides the bats?”

Applejack’s frowning at me as the background noise grows louder. “Well, scoochscoochscoochscooch are a little diseased but that’s HEY, OVER HERE! I mean, NO! HERE! IN THE MIDDLE OF THE ROOM!”

I barely refrain from pounding my hoof on the table. Can’t they see I’m trying to- no, of course they can’t. I can see Applejack frowning.

“hy-re-luhhahuhfa-alri-hauh…”

The sounds are blending together and forcing themselves into my skull. I try to filter it out, putting a hoof to one ear, but I still can’t understand the ponies right next to me. I scowl, putting my head to the table. In the corner of my eye, I can see Fluttershy telling Applejack something, but the homogenous emulsion of a crowd talking is all I hear. I close my eyes. The lack of light helps for a moment, but the sound continues to build and build and build within my skull. I look like an idiot once more, and my patience reaches an end.

”SHUT UUUUUUP! DEAR CELESTIA, JUST SHUT! UP! I CAN’T EVEN HEAR MYSELF THINK IN ALL THIS RACKET!

I open my eyes. Everything’s quiet, and everyone’s staring at me from all over the restaurant. I see Rarity and Rainbow Dash scowling at me a few tables over. Applejack is staring at me. And Fluttershy… she looks startled, and she must be so embarrassed right now.

“I’m sorry,” I say. “I’ll just go now.”

“Blueblood-“

Too late. I’ve teleported out. Now I've blown it for good. Tears are rolling down my cheeks, and it’s still raining. I fire a volley of concussive shots into the clouds, leaving several spots for the sun to shine through. After a few minutes I find myself too weary to continue, so I just plod away to find somewhere out of the rain. I bump into somepony, mumble out an apology, and continue.

“Blueblood?”

I stop. There’s the last one. The one I knew before the Gala. Princess Twilight Sparkle walks up and extends an umbrella over me. “Are you alright?” she asks.

I sigh. “I’ll be fine,” I tell her.

“What’s wrong?” she asks.

I turn around to look at her. She’s frowning, but it isn’t too harsh and her eyebrows are raised. She doesn’t look mad at me, though I can only imagine she’s waiting to unload on me, too. “Nothing,” I tell her.

“Blueblood, I don’t blame you for the Gala,” she tells me. “I’ve seen how you get under a lot of stress, and the night of the Gala definitely counted. If I'd known you were there, I'da been with you." Her eyebrows change, one cocked up. "What were you doing there, anyway?" she asks.

"I'd gotten my ticket months in advance," I explain. "I'd made plans to go, and I was going to do it, whatever happened."

Twilight chuckles. "I know how that feels. Did you hear about the whole Smarty-Pants thing?"

I shake my head, but then it hits me. "I did," I say. "Were you alright?"

"Yeah," she says. "Hard to believe I went to camp with you, isn't it? Thank goodness Princess Celestia was very understanding. My friends really helped, too."

"You have friends?" I ask. Wait, that came out wrong.

"Yep," she says. "Five of them. They're actually the reason I stayed here." Her smile goes away. "Speaking of which, how's your date with Fluttershy going?"

"You worked it out," I say.

"Just a hunch," she says. "You made her really happy," she tells me. "That was her first breakup, even if it was really gentle."

Something occurs to me. “She’s not-“ I stop myself. “Well…”

“No,” Fluttershy says. “You’re not a rebound.”

I look at her. “Fluttershy.”

“I broke up with him a month before I met you. I was ready to move on.”

I start to turn pink. “I’m sorry about…” I stumble here. “…embarrassing you in there.”

“You didn’t embarrass me,” she says. “I looked after Discord: they trust me.”

I can guess what she means, but that’s not a high complement. “Thank you,” I say.

“Would you like to finish our date?”

She motions behind her. Applejack is moving a table into a spot out in the open where there isn’t any rain. I look up: there’s a break in the clouds maintained by Rainbow Dash. I look back down and Rarity is laying out a tablecloth, two plates, and a vase of flowers. I turn back to Fluttershy. She smiles at me. Then I turn back to the others. Rarity and Rainbow Dash have stopped scowling at me, and Applejack is smiling supportively. I turn back to Fluttershy. Slowly, I nod. “I’m willing if you are.”

We walk over to the table. As I sit down, I pull off my bag. “Oh!” I open it and pull out a long tubular container. “This is for you,” I say as I open it.

Fluttershy, Twilight, and Rarity gasp as I pull out a white flower. “Moly?” Fluttershy asks.

“Hoof-picked,” I say. “Hence the, well, remains of the bandages.” Indeed, the bandage is partly see-through now, revealing a rather nasty wound on my side. “It’s hard to pick,” I continue. “If it’s done wrong, the pony gets incinerate…”

Rainbow Dash has stopped frowning and is looking at Twilight, but Fluttershy is staring at me. “Is it too much?” I ask. “You said you wanted it and I-“

Fluttershy is beaming. “No,” she says. “It’s perfect.”

Author's Note

Sorry this is late! Had to deal with insurance worries this week. Also, this chapter gave me trouble, so please tell me if I've screwed anything up.

Sangueblu il Factotum - Pinkie Pie

Blueblood suspected he'd been doing this for too long when he stopped rolling out of Saint Fawna's twin-sized beds. As he stretched, he also realized that his doctors had managed to figure out when he didn't need tranquilizers and restraints anymore. Thus freed, he got up on his hooves and shambled over to the bathroom. There was a toothbrush and paste laid out for him, and since his magic probably wasn't working, he brushed with his hooves.

Blueblood looked in the mirror as he washed his face. The haggard face with deep bags under its eyes did nothing to him anymore. Over the years, he'd learned spells to cover that up and to change his voice. He'd also learned to act. He hadn't figured out how to quell his temper, but he could at least look and sound like he wasn't loopier than a June bug. At least, he thought he could: he barely remembered anything of last night's Gala, just an animal stampede and some attention-seeking mare he wanted to apologize to for some reason.

He wandered out of the bathroom over to the window. It was early afternoon; Blueblood was thankful that they didn't make him sleep late. He looked down and noticed an inkpot and a quill. Digging into his coat, he pulled out a checkbook and drafted up a 2,000,000 bit donation, which he set on his pillow. Then he put the checkbook back, pulled out a folder marked 'hospital', opened it, retrieved a stack of papers, and began to write. "Dear Councilpony Dark Horse:" he narrated to himself, "my apologies if this is late-"

A knock at the door interrupted Blueblood, and he set the quill down. "I'm decent," Blueblood said. He rubbed some more sleep out of his eyes as he heard the door open and close. He turned around.

"Hello, nephew."

Blueblood jumped back against the dresser with a yelp. Princess Celestia was glaring at him. "Your highness!" Blueblood said, a nervous grin plastered over his face. "Hello! I... wasn't expecting you."

Celestia's frown didn't change a bit. "Yes, today seems to be full of surprises. For example, I wasn't expecting to be interrupted in the middle of Parliament by a doctor. I also didn't expect her to tell me that you were in a hospital instead of on a train to Floridock. Finally, I didn't expect to hear that this had been going on for the past five years. Don't say a word!" she snapped at Blueblood as he opened his mouth. She tried to say something, but no sound came out of her mouth. Blueblood opened his mouth, but she just shushed him again. Then she put her hoof to her face with a loud groan. She took a deep breath. "Blueblood, I'm worried about you. How many hours did you sleep last week?"

Blueblood's eyes closed. "I haven't been-"

"Give me a general estimate."

"...six."

Celestia's eyes widened. "And this happens every year?"

Blueblood's frown deepened as he nodded.

"What about the rest of the year?"

"...twenty."

"I see." Celestia sighed. "Blueblood, I'm relieving you of your office at least until you've used up your vacation days for the year. Don't," she told Blueblood as he opened his mouth. "I know that your job is grueling, and I'm glad you work so hard at it. I just don't want you to work yourself into an early grave."

Blueblood sighed. "I know."

"So do something about it." Celestia stopped and swallowed. "Blueblood, while the doctors were taking your pulse, they found a heart murmur. They're worried it might be serious."

Blueblood stared at her, but she didn't change expressions. Unbidden, his eyes tilted down to his chest and a hoof rose over his heart. It didn't feel any different. His eyes widened. "And they still tranquilized me?"

Celestia shook her head. "Your assistants found you unconscious." She frowned. "I'm waiting to see how mad at those two I should be before I punish them, though I will give them credit for getting you to a hospital."

Blueblood said nothing, his eyes and a hoof back on his chest. His heart felt like it had vanished, much like the rest of his insides. "They... it wasn't a heart attack, was it?"

Celestia's frown lost its anger. "They don't know. They want to run some more tests on you. It's not set in stone," Celestia said. "And if you do have heart problems, they can be caught. You have time."

Blueblood was quiet. "I'm at that age," he said. "When-"

"Medicine has improved since then," Celestia told him. "You can live longer." Celestia's gaze got stern. "You have to take better care of yourself, though. If I have to take away your job to save your life, I will. Do you understand me?"

Blueblood looked up at Celestia. Her glare was softer than before, but it was still unyielding. Blueblood nodded. "Yes."

"Good." Her glare faded. "They're ready for you. I've already given them your family history, so they'll just want physical examinations."

Blueblood took a deep breath. "Thank you." He walked towards the door, but stopped at the threshold. "Aunt Celestia," he said, "I don't remember much, but I'm sorry about whatever I did last night. And I'm extremely sorry about everything that went wrong."

He couldn't quite understand Celestia's expression. She looked... guilty? But he couldn't imagine why. "That's alright," she said. "You were just exhausted. Besides, the Gala wasn't your fault."

<***>

A week later, Blueblood was still mulling over her expression as he sat on the train scrutinizing his checkbook register. Did she have something to do with the frenzy at the Gala? She tended to retire early from the Gala, and she had several polite requests after all but two of them, but she wouldn't take it that far, would she? So what was going on?

The train stopped and Blueblood put his checkbook back in his coat. He magically grabbed his luggage and stepped onto the station platform. Gazing at his surroundings only soured his mood further. If he had to abandon his underlings, Aunt Celestia could've at least put him on a train to Manehattan.

Well, maybe not first...

"Hello, Blueblood."

Blueblood turned his head and noticed the unicorn walking towards him. "Hello, Twilight," he said. Then he looked around. "Is Spike alright?"

"Yeah. He's pretty mad and he's also feeling pretty guilty right now."

Blueblood's stern look softened. "He wasn't responsible for anything. I just asked him to keep quiet about my sleeping habits. He had no idea-"

"I know. Your house is this way."

Twilight tried to magically grab one of the suitcases, but Blueblood put his hoof up. "I have the luggage in hoof. Let's just get moving."

Twilight withdrew and the two started walking. "Have they set a date for your surgery?" she asked.

Blueblood's frown returned. "Two months from now." It deepened into a scowl. "Two long, boring months."

Twilight frowned. "Well, you get to see your little brother, so there's that."

Blueblood's scowl lightened. "Well, yes. Honestly, I've been looking forward to that all week." His frown returned. "But what am I supposed to do with the rest of my time?"

"You'll find something," Twilight said. "If you really need something, I'm always looking for volunteers at the library. The Cutie Mark Crusaders help me sometimes, but they can get easily distracted."

Blueblood sighed. "I'll do what I can. And I suppose I could find another hobby."

"Only one, Blueblood," Twilight said. "And I have to approve of it before you start."

Blueblood glared at her, but his frown softened after a moment. "That's fair. Did my piano arrive?"

Twilight nodded. "It did. It's even all tuned up."

"Excellent." He took a look around. "I wonder if the mayor's office-"

"Don't even think about it," Twilight told him. "They're backlogged something fierce right now, but they're not that bad. Here we are."

The two stopped outside a gated, upscale home with a neatly maintained front garden. Twilight magicked the gate open and let Blueblood come through with his luggage. "You should put those down for a moment," Twilight told him.

Blueblood did so. "I take it there's a surprise party?"

Twilight nodded. "Princess Celestia couldn't stop it. Pinkie's toned it down, but she still slips. Just so you know."

Blueblood rolled his eyes, but put his luggage down. "Alright," he said, walking to the front door, "here we go." He pushed open the door and walked in.

There were twenty to thirty ponies sitting there staring at him, on both levels of the split first floor, party hats on their heads and party horns in their mouths. Blueblood stared back at them, then looked back at Twilight, who had just come in. She just shrugged at him. Blueblood turned around and noticed that the party horns were half-extended. He continued to watch as the horns lengthened until they were fully extended.

Prrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrt.

Then the horns slowly started shrinking. Nopony changed facial expressions, they just continued to stare at Blueblood as he stared back at them. Finally, the horns retracted back into a spiral. They then proceeded to do nothing else. Blueblood looked over at Twilight, who smiled at him and shrugged. Then Blueblood began to rise into the air.

Pinkie rose from the floor with a big smile on her face. "Suuuuuuuuuur-PRIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIISE!"

Blueblood fell backwards off of the now standing on two legs Pinkie Pie as everypony cheered. Pinkie then pulled him into a side-hug. "Welcome to your Welcome to Ponyville PARTY! And welcome. Toooo. PONYVIIIIIIILLE!"

Blueblood could feel a set of speakers come on and something on a pipe organ started playing, but he found it hard to focus at the moment. "I'm sure I'll love it here," Blueblood mumbled.

"Of course you will! OK, we don't have a villain coming back after a thousand years of banishment... today, but your Aunt Celestia told me what you like in a party, classical music, hors d'oeuvres, dancing, so you'll be all good and welcomed in no time!"

Pinkie wandered off. Blueblood glared at her, then walked with Twilight to the buffet table. "Let's see these hors d'oeuvres," Blueblood said to no-one in particular as he looked over the table. Vegetables and ranch dressing. Chips and salsa. And... tomato bruschetta. Blueblood stared at it for a moment before he lifted a plate and picked it up along with a few grapes.

"You should really try the salsa."

Blueblood's eyes widened as he turned to face the new voice. "Octavia?"

The grey mare smiled at him. "Your highness," she said, bowing to him. "I'll admit, I was surprised to hear that you were moving to Ponyville."

"I'm rather surprised, too. You live here?"

She shrugged. "I know it seems a little odd, but the rent is reasonable, it's not far from Canterlot, and the ponies that live here really are very nice." She glared at the DJ. "Even if some of them forget their half of the chore list every week." Her smile returned as she turned back to Blueblood. "So why are you here?"

Blueblood frowned. "Enforced vacation. Princess Celestia wanted me to get out of the city and, I suppose, stay with somepony who could keep me in line. Since Cadance is still on her honeymoon and all of my friends live in Canterlot, that left Twilight and Spike. So, here I am. In this desolate little one-horse town."

"It's not that desolate," Octavia told him. "Like I said, Canterlot's only an hour away-"

"Aunt Celestia said that if I set hoof in Canterlot, I would be out of a job." Blueblood groaned "She knows now how well I can sneak around Canterlot."

Octavia stared at him for a moment. "...very well. Well, there's still plenty to do here. In fact, if you keep your ears open, someone's probably going to come up with something for you to do."

"Rainbow Dash, NO!"

"WHOAH!"

The woozy blue pegasus tumbled from the railing on the split level and landed on the foreleg of Blueblood. Her drink was in his other hoof, ice, fluid, little umbrella, and all. "Are you alright?" Blueblood asked her.

Rainbow Dash shoved herself off of him and glared at him. "Yehp," she slurred. She took back her glass. "Thanks fer th'ssist, yeh royal jerkface."

Applejack walked up to Rainbow Dash and guided her away. It was then Blueblood could notice that everypony was staring at him. Even Octavia and Twilight were blinking at him from across the room.

"That was AWESOME!"

Blueblood winced as the pink parakeet screamed in his ear again. "And without any magic! I thought I was the only pony that could do things like that! How long have you been able to do that?"

Blueblood turned away from her and started walking towards the bar. "As long as I can remember," he told her.

The pink one gasped. "You're kidding! I didn't learn to do that until I was eleven! Then again, I lived on a rock farm where nopony was even allowed to smile for several years, so that really isn't very surpri-"

"Don't you have someone else to bother?" Blueblood asked her.

Pinkie pffted. "I'm not bothering you, silly! I'm making you more fun! Just like I made the Gala more fun!"

Blueblood choked back a snarl. "You didn't make the Gala more fun, you made it a disaster."

Pinkie shrugged. "That's not what Princess Celestia said. She actually liked the mess we made."

"PINKIE!"

Blueblood put his hoof up in front of Twilight's face. "Wait a moment," he said. "Princess Celestia?"

Pinkie nodded. "Yep. Princess Celestia told us right after the Gala. She said that the Gala was so incredibly boring year after year that she invited me and everyone else to make it fun again."

"PINKIE, STOP!"

Pinkie looked over at Twilight, then back to Blueblood. Blueblood's annoyed frown was gone. Now his jaw had dropped and his eyes wouldn't focus. Occasionally he'd try to speak, but no words came out. At last, his head dropped, eyes misting over. "It's true," he muttered to himself. "She ruined the Gala on purpose."

Pinkie's smile had disappeared. "What's the matter?" she asked Blueblood.

Blueblood glared into her eyes. "Allow me to introduce myself more thoroughly," he said coldly. "I am Prince Blueblood, Lord Mayor of Canterlot, nephew and ward of Princess Celestia, and for the past seven years, I have funded, coordinated, decorated, cooked for, hosted, and helped clean up after the Grand. Galloping. Gala. Effort which is apparently so unappreciated that my dear aunt decided that she preferred dealing with a riot."

Blueblood could feel a teardrop make its way down his cheek. Pinkie opened her mouth. "She didn't-"

"No," Blueblood continued, "that's right, she preferred ME dealing with a riot! She wasn't there, she was just having a grand night on the town with her six little anarchists! And then, once I've had a heart attack, she sends me here to rub my nose in how useless she thinks I am!" He glared at Pinkie, tried and failed to say something else, then spun on his hoof and stomped toward the bar. "Give me what Captain Crash over there had," he told the bartender, "and don't bother me about my health. I have more pressing concerns."

The bartender didn't even flinch, she just pulled out a tall glass and filled it with apple juice. When Blueblood glared at her, she just bowed her head and moved away. Blueblood looked down at the glass, and then pressed his face up against it, trying to press the tears welling up back into his eyes. At least the racket had died down. But then, he heard something slide towards him on the bar. He tried to ignore it, but he soon became aware of eyes burning holes in the back of his head. His scowl deepened as he slid the thing in front of him so that he could see it.

It was a plate, and he stared at what was on it. There were two slices of golden delicious apples, the smaller split so that it rested on top of the larger. The larger wedge was tilted. On the lower end was a half-wedge of apple big enough to weigh it down. On the upper end was a toothpick stuck into the apple. The whole thing resembled a little yellow alicorn, complete with a mane made out of multicolored and multiflavored cream and the apples glazed with honey. Slowly, he levitated the thing up to his mouth, removed the toothpick, and took a bite.

Sweet Celestia. Just as he'd devised it for his very first Gala.

Blueblood turned around, his frown now gone. Pinkie was sitting beside him. "I'm sorry about everything," she told him. "I was saving that for dessert, but it looks like you needed it now."

"Where did you get it?" he asked.

"I baked it," Pinkie said. "I was feeling nervous because I'd never done a high-class sort of welcome-to-Ponyville-party before. Plus, we don't have very many high-class ponies here in Ponyville, and I wanted the non-high-class ponies to have fun too. Sooo, I asked Princess Celestia if she had any ideas and she loaned me a box of stuff, saying to use whatever I wanted in it. It's all here." She motioned around her. "And it's all yours, isn't it?"

Blueblood took a second look around the room. Hanging from the walls were bright green banners from his second Gala. In the center of the upper level was an abstract, ebony statue he had personally carved for his fourth. He looked at the glass in his hoof again, and recognized it as one of the glasses he'd crafted for his third Gala. As he thought about it, War March of the Princesses, the song the DJ had played at the start, was the song he'd played for his aunt last year. Everywhere around the room was something he'd crafted or invented or played for a Gala.

"My parents have a gi-huge-ic collection of stuff from a bunch of my parties," Pinkie said, "even the one where I accidentally collapsed the rock silo. Princess Celestia might've hated your Galas overall, but it looks like she still appreciates the effort you put in."

"Then why'd she destroy this one?" Blueblood asked.

Pinkie waved her hoof in the air. "That's what I was trying to tell you. The Princess just expected us to do little things like forget what forks we were supposed to use at dinner. She didn't expect everything to go to Tartarus in a handbasket, but she thought you'd just laugh it off as one of those weird, once-in-a-lifetime catastrophes." Pinkie started scratching her head. "Although if you were her nephew, why didn't she just tell you what was wrong with your Galas?"

Blueblood frowned again. "She made a few polite suggestions and I tried to adhere to them. Unfortunately, I have a lot of other things to do." He motioned to his flank. "That's my talent. I got it filling in for three ponies on a class project and now I fit in where I'm needed."

"But are you really needed in that many places?" Pinkie asked him. "Mayor Mare has a hard job, sure, but she doesn't work herself 'wake up in a psych ward once a year' hard. Maybe you should give up a few jobs. Just stick to being mayor and have somepony else do the Gala."

"I can do both," Blueblood protested. "I used to love planning the Gala, and Celestia actually said my first two were some of the only good Galas she'd seen out of the thousand."

"She mentioned those. She just didn't say you did them."

He rubbed his nose. "I wouldn't blame her; the rest were awful. There are many things about the Gala that I can't change, and it's hard to come up with ideas. I was also elected mayor five years ago and other things took a toll on my time." He sighed. "And maybe I only had two good Galas in me."

"Don't be silly," Pinkie told him. "You're just feeling a little burned out. It happens to everypony, especially somepony who puts all of their effort into making other ponies happy. If all you care about is trying to keep everypony satisfied and you don't do anything for you, you're just gonna' disappoint everypony and run yourself into the ground."

There was a pause and Blueblood turned to look at Pinkie. Her smile had vanished, but it quickly returned, though, as she put a foreleg around his shoulders. "Just take a vacation, let somepony else do the job for a while, and then come back when you're ready to start working again."

Blueblood said nothing to her. "OK," she continued, "at least until you remember that a dance floor is supposed to have dancing."

Blueblood glared at Pinkie. "It was going to, but then something happened."

"What? ... Ooooh." Pinkie blushed. "Sorry. Though I probably would'n't have enjoyed the dancing, anyway."

Blueblood's glare continued. "Have you tried it?"

Pinkie shook her head. "No, but it just seems a little too slow for me."

Blueblood smiled at her. "Trust me, it's not that slow." He turned to Octavia. "Miss Octavia, do any of your fellow players live here as well?"

"They're here now."

"Princess Celestia said you liked live music," Pinkie said.

Blueblood stared at her for a moment. "Hmm. Very thoughtful of her. And of you."

"Thanks!"

Blueblood turned back to Octavia. "Would you mind playing Rondo alla Tokara?" Octavia nodded, then gathered her players. "Miss Pie, in the middle of the room, please?"

The ponies cleared a space in the middle of the room that Blueblood and Pinkie walked into. "Alright," Blueblood said, "now, stand up on your hindlegs." She did so, and Blueblood stood with her, placing one hoof in her's, bringing it out, and placing his other hoof on her waist. "Now put your hoof on my shoulder. Good, now let me lead this time around and just be careful where you step. Octavia, you may begin when ready."

Octavia nodded, tapped out the beat, and then the pianist began. As soon as the music started, Blueblood lurched into motion. Pinkie yelped a bit, but managed to keep her hooves beneath her. Blueblood led her around the floor at a quick clip, occasionally guiding her through a dip or a spin, which his partner kept pace with surprisingly well. "And this is your first dance?" he asked her.

"Yep," Pinkie told him.

"Hmm. Now on three, put your left hoof next to mine, and push off with your right..."

As the song came to an end, the two spun around each other, then pulled apart. Blueblood twirled Pinkie to his other side, then the two broke off, falling back on all four hooves. Finally, Blueblood bowed to Pinkie, which Pinkie quickly copied. "You're a gifted dancer," Blueblood told Pinkie.

"As are you, milord," Pinkie replied. Then she looked up at him. "I gotta' say, that was surprisingly intense. Are you supposed to do that with your heart full of holes?"

"I was encouraged to exercise, just so long as I didn't overdo it." Blueblood smirked at her. "And now you see that just because it isn't wild thrashing doesn't mean ballroom dancing is sedate."

"Hey!" Pinkie said. "What I did at the Gala is not wild thrashing!"

"I was exaggerating," Blueblood assured her. "It just always seems a little too wild for my tastes."

"It's not all wild." Pinkie turned to the DJ. "DJ, Slow Music, track 46, please."

The white pony with the purple glasses nodded and put a record on the turnstyle. Pinkie stood in front of Blueblood, but didn't grab on to him. He raised an eyebrow at her. "Just do what comes to mind," she told him.

The song started playing and Pinkie started to lightly prance around the floor. Blueblood quickly started to copy her, warily minding the music. Then the lyrics started. "I wonder what made you select this one," Blueblood remarked dryly.

"It seemed like it fit," Pinkie replied. "I actually heard this song after I'd tried to run five parties at once. I stretched myself too thin and messed things up and all of the parties wound up awful. Then, at the end of the day, I was trudging down the street when I heard a pony start playing that song. I... kind of started bawling my eyes out after that. Everypony thought I'd gone nuts. But then somepony asked me if I was OK. I told them I wasn't and that I'd ruined five parties at once. She thought that was strange, but she let me talk and let me cry and talked about how she'd messed things up over the years and just like that, Rarity and me were friends. Even though I did blow my nose on her scarf, but she said it was out of style so it was OK." The song ended. "Are you alright?"

Blueblood rapidly shook his head. "Yes, just a little distracted." He looked up at the speakers. "That's it?"

"Yeah, it's a short song."

"It's good."

"Told you." Pinkie chuckled. "Looks like we've both learned something today."

Blueblood smiled. "Indeed. Now it's my turn again."

The two kept taking turns calling the music that night. Blueblood called out upbeat classical songs while he sat out and helped other ponies learn to dance, then Pinkie found slower, more modern songs to dance with Blueblood to. Thus the night went on...

<*>

"OW!"

Blueblood awoke when he rolled off the couch. He looked blearily around, then looked down to see Spike. "Shoot!" Blueblood scrambled off of him. "Spike, are you alright?"

Spike got onto his feet with a groan. "I've been better." He turned to face Blueblood. "What about you?"

Blueblood shrugged. "I feel fine."

Spike glared at him. "You mean that?"

"I mean that. Honestly, I think I feel more refreshed than I ha... wait a minute." Blueblood looked at the couch, then around at the mess all over the floor. "I don't remember... Spike, what happened last night? How did I get on the-"

Spike waved him down. "It's OK. You just started nodding off is all. Once you fell asleep, everypony went home." Spike glared around at the mess. "Wish somepony had stayed to clean up the mess, though."

"I got it!"

Blueblood noticed Pinkie pushing a broom. "You and Spike were asleep," she explained, "and I didn't want to wake you up."

Blueblood's eyebrow rose. "You've been in my house all night."

"Well, you couldn't lock the door, being asleep and all, and I didn't want somepony to break into your house, so I stayed up all night and kept watch."

Blueblood stared at her then looked over at Spike. "You'll get used to it," he said with a smile. Then he walked over to the door. "C'mon, Blueblood; there's all kinds of cool stuff I wanna' show you."

Blueblood didn't move and Spike's smile started to fall. Blueblood turned to Pinkie. "You can leave that for later if you want, I can clean up."

Pinkie waved a hoof at him. "That's OK. I set up the party; it's my job to clean it up."

Blueblood looked back at Spike, whose smile was falling as he beckoned to Blueblood. Blueblood turned back to Pinkie. "Well..."

"Tell you what," Pinkie said. "If I do this, you can buy me dinner."

Blueblood blinked at her. "What? I mean, not that I don't want to repay your generosity, but dinner's a little much, isn't it?"

"Not really. I mean, you're cute, you're a good dancer, and you can be a pretty cool guy when you're not all crabby and shoving-ponies-in-front-of-cakes-y." As Blueblood blinked at her, she leaned onto her broom, looking at him upside-down. "So? How 'bout it?"

Blueblood bit his lip as he looked around the room. There was still plenty of trash lying around and he didn't feel right leaving Pinkie to clean up all of it on her own. Also, that stain on the wall would probably need some extra scrubbing power from a unicorn. The plants probably had stuff shoved into their pots and the umbrella rack was crooked...

And Spike didn't even bother scowling at him.

Blueblood turned to Pinkie. "Seven?"

Pinkie beamed at him. "Okey-dokey! See ya' then, Cutie Pie." Then she reached over, booped him on the nose, and charged back into sweeping.

Blueblood couldn't help but smile at that. He turned back to Spike. "Do you mind if we stop at Rarity's house for a moment?"

Spike smiled. "Right this way."

Author's Note

Finally! This chapter really kicked my keister, but I'm caught up now! I wanted to put in a sequence where Blueblood sings this in English, but as y'all can see, I was running over as it was. My apologies if something doesn't sound right, just feel free to comment on what works and what doesn't. And in July, we get to Rarity! I hope.

Sangueblu il Segreto - Pinkie Pie II

Dear Aunt Celestia,

This is Prince Blueblood. I'm sorry this is a week late. I’m alright. I've just lost track of time since arriving in Ponyville. There is actually a surprising number of things to do in this town. Spike has been showing me around and I'm overjoyed that I have the time to play with him. I think I've even found a girlfriend. You probably know her: her name's Pinkie Pie. She's sweet, she's energetic, and she doesn’t keep anything from me.

She actually told me something very interesting recently, regarding the Grand Galloping Gala. She said that you were so bored with it that you hired her and five of her friends specifically to throw a wrench in the works. Let me say that I believe that she was being truthful when she said that you only wanted some minor mischief and that you didn't mean to give me a heart attack. I also want to point out that yes, the past five Galas have been tedious to sit through. I can't deny that. However, I still feel a little betrayed. As nice as it was to know that you'd saved my best work from the past, it still hurts knowing that you went behind my back and destroyed my work for this year, however obliquely.

Celestia stopped reading, laying her head on her desk. She looked over at the blank paper in front of her, took the quill out of the inkpot and laid it on top of the paper. Still nothing came out of it, and she laid the quill back into the inkpot.

"Oh Blueblood," she said, "what do I say to you?"

<*>

"No!"

Pinkie bopped Blueblood on the nose with a newspaper. "We do not do work on vacation," she explained, "especially when we're on vacation because of swiss-cheese heart!"

Blueblood rubbed his nose, regretting leaving the door unlocked. "I wasn't working," he explained. "I just had a few ideas for the next Gala."

Pinkie brightened up as she shoved her face into Blueblood's paper. "Oh really? Like what?"

Blueblood gently pushed her out of the way. "Just minor things, really, like decorations."

“Oh,” Pinkie said. “That centerpiece looks nice.”

Blueblood nodded. “Yes, I’m proud of that one. I can’t wait to actually make it.”

Pinkie glared at Blueblood. “You’re not making everything, are you?”

“This I actually enjoy doing,” Blueblood argued. “But yes, I will delegate what I have to.”

“Good.” Pinkie rubbed him on the shoulder. “If it makes ya’ feel better, my sister Limestone’s a really good sculptor. I could ask her to do it.”

Blueblood nodded. “And she’s just low-class enough that the snobs would cry havok. Celestia’d approve for sure.”

Blueblood scowled into the table. “You’re still mad at her,” Pinkie observed.

Blueblood snorted. "I just wish she'd been completely honest with me." He looked up at Pinkie. "I always hated when my father did that: dancing around what’s wrong, trying not to step on anypony’s tail. I can't fix everything if you don't tell me exactly what's wrong, you know?"

Pinkie shrugged. "Not really. My dad had the opposite problem. He wasn't mean about it," she clarified quickly, "he was just really blunt and he had no idea why I'd start crying after he told me what was wrong with my parties. I'd ask him a question, he’d give me an answer, that was it. He’s a lot better now, though."

“Yes, my father was the exact opposite of that,” Blueblood said. “Constantly finicky, but he was a nice person. He worked a lot, so I spent most of my time with my mother. She was a lot more easy-going and honest.” He sniffed. “At least, right before she ended a seven-year relationship by running off with somepony else and leaving my father to die of a heart attack three weeks later."

Pinkie frowned. “I’m sorry,” she said.

“Don’t be,” he said. “It was twenty years ago, and Celestia was a very kind mother.”

“Yeah, I guessed so,” Pinkie said, “based on how Spike and Cadance turned out. What was it like growing up with them?”

Blueblood smiled. “Well, Spike followed me around like a puppy. He takes after me a lot, including, it seems, in some of his faults. Hopefully, this little episode will keep him from needing heart surgery later. Cadance was nice, but a little meddlesome. Every so often, she’d have some idea about how to draw me out of my shell. She even tried setting me up on a study date with Twilight.”

“Wooooow,” Pinkie said. “I never heard of that. How’d it go?”

Blueblood shrugged. “Well, she didn’t mention it was supposed to be a date, so Twilight and I just worked on our homework together for two hours and left. We barely even noticed each other. What Cadance planned was always fun, but it never worked. Eventually, she stopped trying and just accepted me as I was.”

Pinkie turned pinker. “Yeah, I found that out the hard way with Marble and Maud. Marble didn’t have as much fun as you did. Maud did, though nopony really noticed. She really loves everything she does, but she has a hard time expressing it. It doesn’t really help that she only really focuses on rocks, but that isn’t the only thing she likes.”

Blueblood chuckled. “So many ponies think that about me. It’s not like all I do is work; I have hobbies.”

“You do?” Pinkie asked.

Blueblood frowned at her. “Of course I do!” he told her. “I’m the Lord Mayor of Canterlot: that requires socializing, which means interaction. In fact, I… I… well, one time, I…”

Pinkie giggled as Blueblood’s face blankened. “Alright, I didn’t get out much,” Blueblood admitted. “But I’m getting better!”

Pinkie smiled. “Eeyep!” she said. “Did you enjoy last night?”

Blueblood nodded. “Yes, I actually had some of the leftovers for lunch just now. I didn’t know you could cook like that.”

“Hey, I have a lot of talents,” Pinkie interjected. “Just because I’m a baker doesn’t mean that’s all I know how to make. Honestly, I learned how to cook cook because I started getting genuinely sick of the stuff I served.” She shuddered. “I even hated going into the kitchen with it, which was really scary ‘cause I normally like all that stuff.” Her smile returned. “So I learned some other dishes to make so that I wasn’t eating sweet stuff all the time, and now I don’t hate my job.”

Blueblood nodded. “Yes, variety is the spice of life and all. Or at least, hobbies are.”

Pinkie’s hoof had drifted to her chin. “Hmm, I wonder what life would taste like…”

Blueblood smiled at her, then reached into his mane and pulled out a book. He paused. "It's been two years since I've been able to do that."

Pinkie shrugged. "On the bright side, you've stopped sucking pillows into your mane while you were sleeping."

Blueblood pointed at her. "You know, that actually happened this morning?"

“Yeah, that was freaky as all get-out when I was three. I was scared his mane was gonna’ eat me.”

Spike had entered the room. “Hello, Spike,” Blueblood said. “I wasn’t expecting you.”

Spike pulled out a scroll. “You got a letter from Princess Celestia.”

Blueblood’s smile vanished. “Ah,” he said. “I see.” He took the scroll, laid it down on the table, sat down, and read.

Dear Blueblood,

I know this has been long in the coming, but I'm sorry for what I did at the Gala. I want to reiterate that I didn't intend for everything to go the way it did. I'd hoped that things had mellowed out between the Canterlot Garden Party and the Gala and that the worst part of the evening would be Rainbow Dash trying to steal seats closer to the Wonderbolts. Unfortunately, that didn't happen. I also want to re-iterate that if I had known how much you did, I would’ve stopped everything much sooner.

I still would have removed you from the Gala: you work yourself far too hard. That's something you share with your father. And with me, if I’m honest. That's part of why your father and I were so close when he was alive. If he hadn't married my niece, I might have snapped him up myself. Then I could’ve saved him from her. But then I wouldn’t have met you.

Blueblood scanned the rest of the letter, then put the letter aside and put his head in his hooves. “Everything alright?” Spike asked.

“Peachy,” Blueblood murmured.

“You sure?” Pinkie asked. “’cause you don’t look peachy. Of course, you never looked peachy, but-“

“Yes, I’m alright,” Blueblood said. “You don’t have to worry about me.” Blueblood rubbed his barrel as he leaned on the table.

“Blueblood?” Spike asked.

“It’s just indigestion from last night’s spaghetti,” Blueblood said. “It’ll pass.”

Pinkie’s knee pinched. Then her tail twitched and her ears fluttered. Then her eyes widened and her mouth dropped open. “Blueblood,” she asked, “where’re your nitro tablets?”

Blueblood stared at her, then noticed Spike start sweating. A pit opened up in Blueblood’s stomach. “In the bathroom behind the mirror,” he told Pinkie. “Why?”

“Just stay calm!” Pinkie sped off up the stairs.

“What do you need?” Spike asked.

“Just wait,” Blueblood told him. Blueblood sat at the table staring up after her. After several seconds, she didn’t come back. Several seconds later, she still hadn’t come back. Blueblood managed to keep his breathing under control, waiting for the tightness in his chest to do something.

Then his lungs wouldn’t expand all the way. Blueblood laid his head down on the table, fighting to get all the oxygen he could into himself, but every breath gave him a little less. Then he collapsed onto the table. He tried to move, but he felt so faint that he could barely lift himself. In the process, he fell out of his chair, landing in a heap on the floor. The corners of his vision started to go black as Spike prodded his neck.

Then he saw Pinkie, eyes wide and an orange bottle in her mouth. Spike lifted Blueblood’s head up as Pinkie tilted the bottle into Blueblood’s mouth. Blueblood barely felt something drop onto his tongue. Moving his tongue felt like lifting a concrete slab, but he slowly managed to drag his tongue back, then lift it over the nitro tablet.

He was vaguely aware of being lifted. “C’mon,” Pinkie said from under him. “Hold on!” Then they sped out the door. Blueblood watched the clouds go by for half a minute, vaguely hearing Spike talking to him, then the darkness swallowed him.

<*>

Blueblood awoke in a very comfortable bed with traction bars installed. The pain in his chest had subsided. There were two ponies on his left: one straight-laced brown stallion as well as a blurry pink mare. Then the blur grabbed him and started shaking him. “ARE YOU OK?” she blurted.

The stallion, whom Blueblood recognized as a doctor, gently put his hoof in front of Pinkie and pushed her back. “How are you feeling?” he asked.

Blueblood sat up in the bed. “I’m alright,” he said.

Pinkie glowered at him. “You’re sure?” she asked. “You’re not trying to hide something until it becomes a problem again?”

Blueblood went pink. “Well,” he said, “I really thought it was heartbu...”

He trailed off as Pinkie’s scowl deepened. Then he sighed. “And I didn’t want to worry you in case it wasn’t,” he said. “I’m sorry.”

Pinkie hugged him. “Just tell me next time, OK?” she said. “You really scared us.”

Blueblood looked around the room. “Where's Spike?”

Pinkie frowned. “He’s waiting for Princess Celestia. He wasn't too eager to come in.”

Blueblood’s heart sank. “Can’t… I imagine he wasn’t.”

There was a knock at the door. Blueblood instantly straightened up. “Come in,” he said.

The doctor glared at him as the door opened and grumbled assent as Princess Celestia moved into the room. “I got Spike’s message,” she said. “Are you alright?

Blueblood’s heart sank as he nodded. “How is he?” he asked. “Spike.”

“Worried,” Celestia said. “He wants to make sure you’re alright, but he's scared of finding out that you lied to him again.”

“Not entirely," Blueblood explained. "Tell him I’m sorry and that I’m alright.”

“That would be another lie,” the doctor said. He paused for a moment, looking at everyone. When he only got silence, he turned on an x-ray light. “This is his highness’s heart,” he explained. “In case you can’t see it, it’s a little lighter than the other organs around it. This is a problem, since it means that his heart is getting thinner. The leading theory, given his… unique abilities, is that it’s stretching to close the holes in his heart. That’s good, prevents death by internal bleeding, but that also means his heart is working harder to actually pump blood, meaning it’s more likely to shut down.”

“So we should reschedule his surgery?” Celestia asked.

The doctor shook his head. “Based on how fast his heart is atrophying, that might not fix the underlying problem. Plus, his heart is so worn down by this point that it probably won’t be enough to avoid heart trouble in the future. He might need a transplant. The good news is that, thanks to the assistance of our local potioneer, we have longer to find one. Any questions?”

Blueblood said nothing; his brain had stopped working at ‘transplant’. Pinkie opened her mouth, but Celestia closed it with a frown and a shake of her head. “Very well,” the doctor said. “I’d like you to stay here for observation, your highness. In the meantime…” he produced a clipboard and placed it on Blueblood’s bedside table, “would you mind filling out your information again? Pinkie Pie was instrumental in getting you here in time, but she seems to write chicken scratch when panicked.”

“This isn’t chicken scratch,” Pinkie protested. “This is-“

“Pinkie Pie,” Celestia interrupted, “maybe you should go check on Spike. Tell him that everything is under control.”

Pinkie’s eyes widened, then she nodded. “Will do, Princess Celestia.”

She turned to the door, but then she turned back to Blueblood. “I’ll be alright,” he told her. “Pinkie Promise.”

Pinkie’s mouth tightened, but she nodded and left. Blueblood then turned to the clipboard. “Alright, let’s see,” he said out loud. “Name: Blueblood. Age: twenty-eight. Blood type: AB positive.”

“Blueblood?”

Blueblood stopped at his aunt’s voice. Then he sighed. “I know, I was wrong to cover up something so important. My brother's going to hate me.”

“He won’t hate you,” Celestia told him. “He’ll be mad at you, but only because he's worried about you. And you don’t have to worry about a lecture… I’m also guilty of keeping secrets I really shouldn’t. I understand why you did it, and I know you’re going to try harder next time.”

Blueblood frowned at his aunt for a moment, but the frown quickly faded. “Thanks,” he said. He turned back to the clipboard. “Allergies: none. Medications-“

“I can fill this out,” Celestia offered. “That way, you can rest.”

Blueblood stopped writing. Then he looked at Celestia. Then he thought it over, whether bed rest was worth shoving something onto his-

He handed the clipboard over. “Nothing’s really changed since last time,” he said, snuggling into the blankets.

“Alright,” Celestia said. She lifted the quill and wrote at top speed. “Oh, Blueblood?” She smiled. “You and Pinkie are very cute together.”

“Thank you,” Blueblood mumbled.

Author's Note

Finished already! I'd started this a little earlier, so I could finish it all the sooner. I'm sorry if it's short, but I struggled a bit to come up with conversation. I can do some more work on my original fiction, available here.. If you want to see the rough draft of a story in a world entirely built by me, please check it out and comment! But for certain, next week, I'm going to write the next chapter of Scrap Basket! And next time on this fic is the second chapter of Rarity!

Pinkie Pie e Sangueblu il Tempestoso (III)

Dear Aunt Celestia,

No heart attacks today. I spent the whole day on my piano, ran out of songs to play. Read a book, couldn't finish it. Tried to proofread my checkbook, Pinkie wouldn't let me. Go ahead and continue with Twilight. Going back to sleep now.

I can't wait for my new heart.

-Blueblood

Celestia pushed the letter to the side. She was seated at her desk, breathing deeply as she looked down. There were two other letters, one for each week since the heart attack, all in her desk drawer. Softly frowning, she opened the drawer and slid the other one in.

For a moment, she froze. Blueblood's condition had put her on edge. Twilight's test had been bumped back a few weeks, Celestia waiting to gauge how Blueblood would react to a new princess. A few months ago, she would've carried on without a worry. Now that she knew, though...

Celestia looked down again and she noticed something on her desk. A red ribbon, with a wish written on it. It was a relic from a time long ago, and she'd never had the heart to get rid of it. She lifted it in her hooves. Thoughts of a lover trickled into her mind. Someone who'd been there for her over a thousand years, and whom she'd been there for just as long. Until last month.

Frowning, she put the ribbon down and shoved it to the side. Their relationship was been a terrible idea, and Celestia knew that. Every so often, she'd tried to pull out and find a better one, but they'd never lasted. Twenty years ago, she thought she'd found a winner, but she couldn't commit. So her niece snapped him up, then left him a few years later. Factorus hadn't lasted the year, and his son came to live with her.

Celestia sighed. On the one hand, so much could've been prevented, and she could've been so happy with him. On the other...

The door opened and Celestia's head snapped up. A look didn't calm her nerves, though, and it took a moment for her to wave the visitor in. "Thank you for coming," she said. "I haven't told him yet."

<<***>>

Blueblood slumped on his bed, his forelegs crossing over himself. He took in a rough breath as his hoof started twitching. He'd been lying in bed all morning, after a light, sensible breakfast of melon balls and honeyed toast. He'd been feeling weak lately, and he hadn't left his house in a while. Most of all, though, he was bored to tears.

He shifted himself up. The books on his bookshelf were all things he'd either read or had no interest in reading. He then spent a few moments gauging himself. Strong enough to walk downstairs, probably not enough to leave the house for more than a few minutes. Blueblood sighed roughly, then put his hooves under his pillow and flipped it up over his muzzle, opening his mouth to scream.

Then the pillow lifted off of him. "Careful there, Bluey! You could smother yourself!"

Blueblood sighed. "Hi, Pinkie."

Pinkie Pie sat on the floor next to Blueblood's head, a smile on her face. "How're you feeling?"

Slowly, Blueblood rolled to face Pinkie Pie. "Another stay-at-home day. Is Spike coming?"

Pinkie frowned. "No," she said. "Twilight's re-filing the library."

Blueblood sighed as he rolled back onto his back. "Figures."

"So, anything you want to do?" Pinkie pulled a pile of boxes out of her mane. "Monopony?"

"Played it yesterday."

"OK, how about Scrabbull?"

"Day before that."

"Chess? Checkers? Mouse Trap?"

"Pinkie, I'm just not in the mood."

Pinkie was surprised by the sudden change in Blueblood's tone that she dropped her boxes. A moment later, though, she'd recovered. "So, anything you do want to do?"

"Plenty," Blueblood growled. "All work-related. I know it's bad for my heart," he snapped, hoof cutting Pinkie off. "I know that. But if I don't do something productive, I'm going to go out of my mind!" Blueblood's hooves went to his face just in time for him to muffle a scream. Five seconds later, when his lungs had run out of air, his hooves fell off of his face, and he sighed, staring up at the ceiling.

Then he felt Pinkie Pie lay down beside him. "You know, I twisted my leg once," she told him. "Just walking nine days after I got my cutie mark and I stuck my hoof in a gopher hole. I couldn't walk for several days. After just ten minutes, I was about to go lookoo-in-the-cuckoo" She leaned back on the bed, but stopped herself halfway down. "But then I thought of something. I thought 'if I had everything I could ever want, what sort of party would I throw? Who would I want to be there?'"

Blueblood turned his head to Pinkie's side. She was smiling, per usual. "Once I'd thought that up, I started making it harder. What if I only had one flavor of ice cream? What if the barn lost its roof and a storm was blowing in?' Little questions like that actually kept me occupied for quite a while. And then my hoof was all better and I could go out and do them."

Pinkie laid a hoof on Blueblood's shoulder. Still, Blueblood was quiet, nodding to himself. He hadn't thought of that, but it didn't sound like it would work. He stared up at the ceiling, the same ceiling he'd stared at five days ago. He closed his eyes. Sure enough, he could picture it perfectly in his mind's eye.

Blueblood sighed. "Well... uhhh." He could see Pinkie leaning in closer to him, eyes wide and smile wider. "Hang on." Blueblood closed his eyes, trying to think of something. The grand galloping gala came to mind, but he knew he couldn't make that work. The problem was, after seven years, that was all he got to do. He couldn't help but draw a blank.

Soon, Blueblood realized he could feel Pinkie's eyes burning a hole into his face. Without opening his eyes, he raised his hoof and pushed her back a little. He paused, trying to hunt down some sort of inspiration. At long last, his nose provided an answer. He opened his eyes.

"Brunch," he said. "It'd be a brunch party at the Opal Garden, early October."

Even when he wasn't looking at her, he could sense Pinkie's eyes widening. "Oooooh! That's GREAT! Potato fritters, pancakes, maple syrup-"

"Eh eh eh," Blueblood said. "This is my party, remember?"

Pinkie deflated a little. "Oh," she said. "Right. Well what would you put out?"

Closing his eyes, Blueblood held up his hoof as he focused on recreating smells. "Hmm..." he said. "Eggs Florentine, for one. That's poached eggs on spinach and a biscuit with butter-egg yolk sauce. Melon balls, blueberry scones, probably coffee cake."

"Buh-LEGH!"

Blueblood opened his eyes at Pinkie's noise. To his lack of surprise, Pinkie was writing things down, her tongue sticking out. "Something wrong?" he asked.

Pinkie looked up, her tongue vanishing back into her mouth. "Uhh..." She straightened up. "Why do ponies drink coffee?" she asked. "It's all... bitter, even if you load it with sugar."

In response, Blueblood rolled his eyes. "Some ponies like bitter," he said. "Besides, it helps ponies wake up in the morning."

"I never understood that," Pinkie answered. "I actually tried some, it put me to sleep for two days."

Blueblood snorted. "Of course it did," he said. As Pinkie stared at him, he waved her off. "Never mind. But I'd also include quiche and cinnamon rolls and the like."

"Mmm," Pinkie said, her smile returning.

Blueblood nodded, then looked back up at the ceiling. "For entertainment, I'd see if I could get Octavia and friends to play something by Clopland or Holstein. Not exactly chamber music but I think my guests would appreciate the variety. I know I would."

Pinkie stared at Blueblood blankly for a moment, but then hummed as she wrote that down. "Oh, who would your guests be?"

A blank came over Blueblood's mind. "Uhh... uh, well..." He frowned as he tried to think of names. "Umm... Dilius and his wife Saphira, the Cufflink Twins... umm..."

"What about me?"

Blueblood looked up to find Pinkie grinning. "You?"

"Yeah!" she remarked. "I mean, we are dating, after all! Don't you want me to meet your friends?"

The breath caught in Blueblood's chest a little. He'd completely forgotten about her. His mouth opened. Then he stopped, frowning a little as he stared at his hooves. "Well, yes, but..."

Pinkie's smile faltered. "But what?"

Blueblood looked back up. "Well, this isn't exactly your type of party," he told her.

The smile finally started to droop. "Oooo-kay," she said. "But it's still your party."

"But you won't be having fun," Blueblood told her. "Don't take this the wrong way, I'd love to have you there, really. It's just not your kind of party, and not your type of ponies. Trust me, you'll be crawling up the walls and bo..."

"No I wouldn't!"

"Pinkie, you did."

Pinkie had her mouth open, but a frown from Blueblood made her close it again. Then her smile vanished. "Well..." she started. "Yeah, OK. The gala wasn't one of my best moments. But I wasn't dating you at the time!" she pleaded. "I mean, if I was-"

Blueblood held up his hoof. "Pinkie, please don't lie to me," he told her.

Pinkie's mane flattened as her face fell. Blueblood felt his heart sink. Finally, after a few moments of silence and a swallow, she opened her mouth. "Sorry."

A moment later, Blueblood had reached over and embraced Pinkie Pie. "Pinkie, I love you as you are," he told her. "I don't want you to change that just for me."

Silence. A long time later, Pinkie had said nothing. Blueblood pulled back. "Are you alright?" he asked.

How slowly Pinkie Pie turned stuck with Blueblood. Her face, her body language, he had never seen her so muted before. "Blueblood..." Pinkie took a breath. "...do we belong together?"

Blueblood stared. "What?" he breathed. "Pinkie, where did-"

"We don't have anything in common!" Pinkie snapped. Tears welled up in her eyes. "I mean, yeah, we're party ponies, we have the same gift, but that's it! We don't like the same food, the same music, the same anything! And lately you've just been in such a funk whenever I've come over-"

"Pinkie!" Blueblood gently laid his hooves on Pinkie's shoulders. "Pinkie, please don't work yourself up! Yes, I've been a little moody lately, but that's not your fault. I'll get over that in time."

That silenced Pinkie for a moment, but soon her mouth opened again. "But what about after that?" she asked. "Couples do things together. Once you're not stuck in bed... what are we going to do together?"

As Pinkie's tears continued, Blueblood tried to wipe them away. "We'll think of something," he said. "We're bound to have something we like to do together. For example..." Blueblood leaned across the bed, flicking through a set of vinyl records. "I actually have a fondness for a few of your kind of musicians. Uhh..."

He reached down, grabbing set of four or five in his mouth before lifting them back up. Then he spread them across his lap. "Here you are," he said. "How do you feel about these?"

Pinkie looked over the labels. As she read, one corner of her mouth pulled back slightly, exposing her clenched teeth. Finally, she pointed to one. "I've heard of this one," she said.

The sad tone in her voice caused Blueblood's heart to sink. "Alright," he said, his voice retaining some optimism as he pushed the records back into their usual home. "Well, I know you've done some research on classical music. Have you found anything you like?"

Pinkie shook her head, but then stopped. "The Sorcerer's Apprentice," she said.

Despite his best efforts, Blueblood winced. "OK," he said. "Have you given-"

He stopped as Pinkie shook her head again. "I only know that one because Octavia was playing it for Pumpkin and Pound Cake. I'm sorry, I've been really busy lately!"

"That's alright." Blueblood scooched himself on his bed. "You know, she recorded a version of that for the spoons and the grass whistle. I think you'd like it."

Pinkie stared at him. "Really?" she asked. "She never told me that, and she's told me some embarrassing things."

"Like her root canal?" Blueblood grinned as Pinkie's lips pinched together. "It was early in her career, and she was more interested in experimenting, so she recorded The Satirist's Apprentice. It didn't do well, so she buried the idea and all but pretended it never happened. I never could stand the original, but I think you'd like it. I kind of wish she'd done more."

Pinkie straightened up. "She is!" she chirped. "With Vinyl! Yeah, they were working on something called Rhapsody in Blueshift?"

Blueblood's smile widened. "I have to show you that," he said. "Trust me, you'll love it. And yeah, it's nice to see Vinyl encouraging Octavia like that."

"Oh, she does that all the time!" Pinkie started to grin again. "They might get on each others nerves, but the two also love to play off of each other. Vinyl's even recruited Octavia's quartet a few times for some of her original albums. You might like her latest one. It felt sort of classic-y, but I can't tell you how."

Blueblood leaned back. "Bring it by some time," he said, "and I'd be happy to. We could even listen to it together."

"Yeah, we cou-"

The corner of Blueblood's mouth quirked up as something seemed to dawn on Pinkie's face. "Pinkamena," he drawled, "don't look know, but I think we found a common interest."

For a few moments, Pinkie sat in silence. Eventually, though, she started to straighten up. "You're right!" She smiled, but it slid off of her face in a moment. "Just that?"

"That's enough for me," Blueblood told Pinkie. "Pinkie, there's something my sister told me when she tried to get me to try dating. What you have in common doesn't matter quite as much as how you feel together." Blueblood leaned forward, placing his hooves on Pinkie's shoulders. "And you, Pinkie, make me feel more alive than I have in years. You're getting me to try things I hadn't tried before, and I'm actually enjoying talking to you."

Blueblood linked his legs together, holding Pinkie in a hug. For several moments, he just hung there. Then he felt Pinkie hop up, her own hooves wrapping around him. "I think I feel the same way," Pinkie said. "I like hearing you talk about stuff, even if I can't understand it." She pulled away. "I'm just worried that-"

A white hoof pressed itself to Pinkie's lips. "Let's let that happen as it happens," Blueblood told her. "OK?" His hoof slowly slipped down, leaving Pinkie to stare at Blueblood for several seconds. She hovered for a few moments, slowly leaning inwards, a small rivulet of sweat running down her face. Blueblood's heart started to race, but he closed his eyes and leaned forward in kind, his lips pursing past his nose.

Then Pinkie broke contact. Blueblood's eyes opened just in time to see Pinkie start walking away. "I'll go see if I have that record," she told Blueblood as she left, smiling again.

Blueblood pouted for a moment, but seeing a spring in Pinkie's step caused him to smile again as he snuggled back into his sheets. He then closed his eyes, preparing for a quick nap before Pinkie got back.

Author's Note

So sorry this took so long! It took me forever to think of something to write here, and another forever to get it knocked out. Not to mention I had something commissioned I wanted to get cleared away first. Still, I have a more solid idea for the next one, and it should hopefully take less time (after the other things I have, but still). Up next: Princess Luna and Blueblood the Manipulative!

Blueblood the Steely - Rarity

"Are you alright?"

Prince Blueblood looked up at the two unicorns standing over him in the hospital corridor, a yellow mare and a grey stallion with glasses. Blueblood had a long gash running down his face that had just been stitched together and he had just stopped crying. "Do I look alright?" He didn't even bother with the accent.

Jet Set rubbed the area around his glasses. "Yes, that was a stupid question. Will you recover?"

Blueblood swallowed, then nodded. "Alley Cat, though... he was just moved to the CTD ward."

Upper Crust scowled. "And did one of the doctors actually use that term?"

Blueblood nodded. "She seemed rather sleep deprived, though."

Jet Set looked over at her. "Connective Tissue Disease?"

"Circling The Drain. I'm still going to have words with some of the doctors here. That sort of parlance in front of patients is just inexcusable." With that, she stormed down the hall, muttering about back-country doctor/veterinarians.

Jet Set turned back to Blueblood. "What were you doing?" Jet Set asked. "Don't just say that you were in an alleyway. How did you get to that alleyway? You've managed to avoid being mugged for a whole year so far; what changed now?"

Blueblood turned away from him, and his frown deepened. "Blueblood, please don't tell me that you gave that stallion money."

"He was an old friend and his home was about to be foreclosed on," Blueblood said. "I couldn't just let him be thrown out on the streets."

"Yes, and the sudden influx of money caught the attention of other poor ponies! You fed the fish, but you put blood in the water, too! And now the sharks have attacked."

Blueblood's mouth opened, but no words came out. For a long time, he worked at it, but he said nothing. Instead, his eyes started to water and he started to sniffle. At last, he put his head in his hooves and started sobbing. Jet Set frowned at him for a moment, but sat down next to Blueblood and put a leg around him. Blueblood leaned into him, causing tears to run down his friend's suit.

"She chose wrong," Blueblood sobbed. "I can't do this."

Jet Set patted him on the back, but said nothing.

<*>

Dear Prince Blueblood,
We would like thank you for your contribution. In spite of our recent legal trouble, you'll be thrilled to know that we are continuing our work with...

Blueblood crumpled up the letter with his hooves and threw it against the wall. Then he shivered. One day he'd have to fix that broken heater, just as soon as he could find enough wire. He threw a second frigid blanket over himself and tried to think warm thoughts. Given the freezing January rain just outside and the draft running through the house, he failed.

"Well, at least I have a roof over my head now," Blueblood hissed bitterly to himself.

CLANG-CLANG!

Blueblood's head rose at the sound of his doorbell. Then it rang again. And again and again and again. Blueblood growled. Some stupid child trying to yank the chain off of his doorbell, no doubt.

Or somepony who needs help.

Blueblood smacked himself on the head. "No," he whispered. "You're overreacting."

It could be somepony who needs a helping hoof. Maybe a house collapsed on top of somepony. Maybe they need a strong stallion to get somepony to a hospital. Maybe somepony's trying to kill them.

Blueblood stood, shaking the blankets off of himself, and sped out of the room. In the hallway, he effortlessly clambered across a wide plank covering a hole in the floor. Then he came to the stairs, nimbly stepping on the steps that hadn't rotted away. Finally, he stormed past the array of pots and pans in front of the sitting-room doorway and opened the door.

The door then slammed him into the wall.

"I am s-s-so t-t-terribly sorry to imp-p-p-pose upon you," he heard a slightly raspy mare saying as things were wheeled in, "b-b-but my money and t-t-train ticket were s-st-stolen by a p-p-pickpocket and y-y-you're the only d-d-door that opened. M-m-m-my magic was failing and if I d-didn't get these out of the r-r-rain soon, they'd r-r-run!" She spent several seconds coughing, sounding like a goose honking. After that, she spent several more seconds just breathing, then gasped. "...oh, C-C-Celestia! I'm s-so t-terribly sorry!"

The front door slammed shut and Blueblood fell to the floor. He groaned as he forced himself upright and shook himself. He turned to face the intruder. She was a unicorn; white, with a purple tail that hung damp behind her. She was all dressed up in a light dress, with a scarf covering her mouth and nose and stylish sunglasses. Obviously she'd been out on the streets for quite a while, since she was shivering and soaked to the bone. "Hello, P-P-P-Prince B-B-Blueblood," she stammered, attempting intimidation.

Blueblood frowned at her. She looked familiar. The ponies who would know him were a surprisingly homogeneous group even if he had been paying attention to them. Her color scheme was in vogue at the moment and he didn't see too many cutie marks. "Hello," he said guardedly.

Are you just going to let her freeze on you?

"Look, whoever you are, you should probably get out of those clothes. You'll freeze to death if you don't." Blueblood walked to the bathroom and grabbed the only clean-ish towel left on the rack.

When he returned, the mare had pulled her top off and was trying to pull her skirt down when she noticed him. Then she glared at him again and motioned for him turn around. Blueblood rolled his eyes and turned around, levitating the towel into hooves reach. Finally, he felt her grab the towel out of his magic. "N-now you may t-turn around."

Blueblood did so. "Did I have to turn around in the first place?" he asked.

Despite her head and face now being covered by the towel and her sunglasses still being on, Blueblood could feel her glowering at him. "Y-yes," she spat. "It's called propriety. Then again, I shouldn't be surprised that your knowledge is lacking in that department. You demonstrated your ineptitude at that a long time ago, back at the Grand Galloping Gala. Come to think of it, you sound different. A little more brassy."

"Of course I sound different," he said. "This is my actual voice. Did you think I sounded like Roderick Ponce von Featherbottom all the time?" He waved his hoof at her. "Don't answer that; of course you did."

"Yes, because whenever I meet somepony, of course I suspect that they have a false voice, especially when it's so close to my ow-"

She was interrupted by a series of hacking coughs. Blueblood stared at her. "Are you alright?" he asked gently.

When she was finished coughing, she continued glaring at him. "I'm not going to die on your floor, if that's what you're asking. Neither are you going to catch it. I promise I'll be out of your mane as soon as the rain lets up."

Blueblood hesitated a moment before nodding. Then he frowned out a window. "If I ever find out who created this unauthorized rainfall," he growled, "I'm going to tan her hide. Not only is it idiotic, it's deadly."

"Deadly?" the mare asked.

Blueblood turned to her. "For the homeless ponies on the street, as well as anypony who just passes out." He sniffed. "You'd think that between four elements of harmony saving Equestria, more than one of them could spare some time for publicizing more mundane issues."

The mare gave him an odd look, but her irritation faded as she looked out the window. "Yes, it is awful. And to think I was worried about getting a hot bath."

Blueblood hmphed. "You'd have to find some hot water first. The water heater is broken."

The mare hmmed, then shivered. "No offense, but could I trouble you for a blanket?"

Blueblood pinched his lips together, but nodded and walked to the couch. "They're all cold, though, and the heater won't work until I can get some wire, so you'll want to use a Warming Charm once it's on." Blueblood retrieved the blanket and draped it over the mare. "If this goes into the night, you can have the couch," Blueblood said. "There aren't any holes in this room so you should be-"

The mare staggered on her hooves. Unbidden, Blueblood dashed to her side and propped her up. "Bad idea," she moaned. "Head hurts too much."

Blueblood frowned as his horn lit up. "Come on," he said while charming the blanket, "let's get you on the couch."

With his help, the mare staggered over to the couch and fell onto it. Then she slowly lifted her legs and tucked them under the blanket. She let out a groan as she rolled onto her back. "Thank you," she told Blueblood.

"Not at all," Blueblood said.

A loud growl sounded from the bowels of his guest. Blueblood swore he could see her blush through the towel. "I don't suppose you have anything to eat, do you?" she asked.

She needs a warm meal. She's been out in the cold and she's obviously ill. You can risk going hungry better than she can.

Blueblood gave her a good hard glare before he walked back into the kitchen. "Nothing fancy," he called out.

"That's alright," the mare called out before coughing again.

Blueblood looked through the pantry, but it was empty. Likewise with the refrigerator. It was only after sweeping his hoof through the cabinet under the sink that he found a can of pea soup. He kept looking through the kitchen, but he could find nothing else. Thus, he grabbed a saucepan, opened the can, and poured the soup into the pan. He then walked back into the sitting room and over to the fireplace, but stopped. The coal bucket was empty.

You're not going to make her eat it cold, are you?

Blueblood rolled his eyes and magically knocked a section out of the floor. Then he broke the wood into pieces, placed it under the grate, and lit it with his magic, placing the saucepan on top. "Shouldn't take long," he said.

"Alright."

Blueblood turned around. "Ugh, why're you still wearing that towel?" he asked.

The mare's sunglasses grew wider. "Uh...uh..."

"Just take it off."

"NO! ABSOLUTELY NOT!"

Blueblood put his hoof to his face. "You're going to have to take it off to eat, your highness; you might as well just get it over with."

"No I don't! I'll just... move a little bit around the mouth. I don't have to take it off!"

Blueblood grabbed the towel in his magic. "Just take it off!"

The mare held it down with her hooves. "NO!"

Blueblood and the mare wrestled with the towel. "What, do you have a pimple on your face?" Blueblood asked.

"No!"

"Is your makeup running?"

"No."

"Then why are you so attached to this towel?"

With one final hard yank, the towel and glasses came off, and Blueblood staggered back at what was revealed. The areas around the mare's eyes and nose were bright red, with huge dark bags under her bloodshot eyes. "Good grief!" Blueblood cried. "You look like Death warmed up!"

The mare glared at him. "Still as tactful as ever, I see."

Blueblood growled at her. "You're obviously too sick to go out, but you're still running around over..." temporarily mute, he motioned towards the rack of clothes, "...that?!"

"Those are important!"

"They're patterns of cloth sewn into fancy shapes! They're almost utterly useless! It would have been better if they'd been made into crash pads!"

CRASH!

Blueblood and the mare whipped their heads around. The ceiling had fallen in, and a plume of debris coated the air. Blueblood rolled his eyes, but the mare rushed to the wreckage. With a growl, Blueblood magically grabbed her. "Stop!" he hissed. "If the ceiling hasn't finished falling, then-"

The mare wasn't paying attention. She was staring at the wreckage, eyes starting to water. Then her head fell and she started to sniffle. Finally, she let out a loud wail.

"AUUUUUUGH, EVERYTHING'S RUIIIIIIIIIIIIIINED!"

The mare fell to the floor and bawled. As she continued to babble, Blueblood scowled, his eyes about to pop out of his head.

You can't say it. She's obviously crazy. If you say it, she's going to get crazier.

Blueblood's lips curled up, revealing his teeth. 'She has to hear it,' he thought. 'I'm doing her a favor.'

"Oh, pull yourself together, you high-class twit!" he snarled.

She stopped. "A bunch of useless junk got turned into more useless junk, big deal. It shouldn't even be yours; you should be at home in a fancy-pants, gold-leaf, bubble bath! But nooooo, that would interfere with shopping and fleecing some poor desperate stallion out of his money. I weep for the poor idiot who marries somepony like you! Maybe in three months, he'll be able to afford a pet rat for compa-"

SMACK!

Blueblood stumbled back, landing on his side. He rubbed at his chin then looked up. The glare he received made him shuffle backwards, bumping into the couch.

"How dare you." the mare hissed. "How dare you insult me like that! I'll have you know that Rarity, bearer of the Element of Generosity, is no leach! Any money to my name I earned fairly, by blood, sweat, and tears! Furthermore, based on your current quarters, you are the last pony to be lecturing me about how I spend my money! Where did yours go, bad weekend in Monacolt?" She put a hoof to her head. "No, don't answer that. Ugh, and to think I ever found you appealing." She turned. "I'm leaving before I-"

Her horn flickered out, dropping her sunglasses, as she started coughing again. As it continued, her knees started shaking before she collapsed. As she stopped coughing and started sucking down breath, Blueblood stared at her. He had seen her; not just at the Gala but a few months earlier, at the launch of the Navigator prototype...

<*>

"What am I doing here?" Blueblood asked.

Princess Cadance looked at Blueblood. "Rebuilding your relationships with high society so that you can resemble a functioning member of royalty." She poked him in the chest. "You're also talking to the sister you seem to have forgotten about, given that I haven't heard from you in a month."

Blueblood went a little pink at those words. "Ah," he said. "Sorry. I've been a little..."

Blueblood fell silent. "I heard," she said. "I'm not mad at you; I'm just concerned is all."

"I'm still sorry," Blueblood told her. "Princess Luna mentioned that Shining Armor proposed to you?"

Cadance nodded. "He did."

Blueblood squinted at his sister's horn. "He did remember to give you a ring, didn't he?"

Cadance winced. "He did. It's a very nice ring, but I heard about the hospital going under and..."

Blueblood frowned. "I don't do that anymore. Besides, I'm not mad at you; I'm mad at the high-class fribbles who withdrew their support." He sighed. "It's weird: the only rich ponies who actually care about charity are the very richest."

Cadance smiled. "Well, there's one more," she said. "I can't stay, I've got a meeting, but another reason you're here is because I want to introduce you to someone who might lift your spirits a little. The Element of Generosity is getting the rich to help the community."

Blueblood stared at her for a moment before he shrugged. "About time," he mused, no malice in his voice. "Who is she?"

"Her name is Rarity. She's a unicorn with white fur and an indigo coiffure. She's a fashion designer. She should just be milling around, I don't think the host has anything planned for her."

"Alright." Blueblood smiled. "I think I'll go find her."

Cadance beamed at him. "You go do that."

Blueblood turned around and set off into the crowd. It wasn't long before he spotted someone. "Good afternoon, Miss Rarity," he said.

Cadance winced. "Please don't use the voice," she moaned.

The earth mare turned around. "I beg your pardon?" she asked.

<*>

Seven trend-followers later, Blueblood gave up and just milled around the crowd, saying nothing. Eventually he got called up on the podium due to his princeliness, although no-one made any attempt to talk to him. Then another mare was called up to actually launch the ship. A name wasn't given, since everyone apparently knew it and Blueblood didn't care enough any more to ask. Then months went by and Blueblood forgot all about her. And now here she was coughing on his living room floor.

Blueblood lifted the blanket and magically tucked it around her. "Please take it easy," he told her.

Rarity glared at him. "I'm sorry about how I've been treating you," he said. "You're a friend of my sister's and if I had known who you were-"

"If you let me tell you at the Gala," Rarity rasped.

Blueblood winced. "I'm sorry."

Rarity turned away from him, but then started coughing again. She shuddered all over and Blueblood could see tears coming out of her eyes. Eventually, the fit ended, and Rarity pointedly faced away from Blueblood. Blueblood frowned, but then his ears perked up. Unbidden, he walked over to his closet, quickly pulling on his white and slightly stain-spotted coat, shirt, and trousers. He checked his coat pocket and pulled out a small bag. He checked through it, then walked into the living room and laid down to look under the furniture. He spotted a coin and levitated it into the bag. "I'll be right back," he told Rarity. Ignoring the roll of her eyes, Blueblood walked to the front door and stepped out into the rain.

Seven minutes later, Blueblood returned, sopping wet. Rarity was on the couch. He threw his coat and trousers on the floor, shook off some excess water, and retrieved a bottle of cough syrup from a coat pocket. "Here," he said, pouring some of the liquid into the provided cup and levitating it in front of her, "this should help."

Rarity looked at him, surprisingly gently, but then another coughing fit racked her body. She grabbed the cup and chugged the medicine. Then she took a few gentle breaths as Blueblood retrieved the cup. Rarity turned back to him. "Thank you," she said.

"You're welcome." Blueblood screwed the cap back on the bottle and set it on a nearby table. He pointed at the clothing under the rubble. "I assume you made those?"

Rarity nodded curtly. "Yes. I spent a whole month working on them, the last three days with the flu."

"Then why are you out here?" Blueblood asked her. "Based on how horrible your cough is, you should be home resting. You can afford to miss one fashion show: you're friends with four princesses."

Rarity glared at him. "So if I missed one, ponies wouldn't start muttering about how I'm really a country bumpkin who only got this far by kissing up to a princess?"

"...yes, I see your point." Blueblood looked over at the saucepan. "I think the soup's probably overdone."

Blueblood levitated the pan off of the fire and onto the hearth. "Hold on, I'll find you a bowl." He walked into the kitchen, picked out the least-chipped bowl he could find, and walked back into the living room. He laid the bowl down in front of Rarity and tipped the saucepan's contents into it. "There you go."

Rarity pushed the bowl towards him. "I'm sorry," she said, "I'm being needy enough."

Blueblood pushed it back over to her. "You're sick. You need something to eat."

Rarity pushed it towards Blueblood again. "I can't take the last of your food. I'll go without tonight."

"I insis-" Blueblood stopped, then scowled. "Were you snooping around?"

Rarity averted her eyes. "Uhh..."

Blueblood opened his mouth, but could say nothing. He turned on his hooves and stormed away. "I'm sorry," Rarity said. "I just..." Rarity tapered off.

"You wanted to know why a prince is living in a rat hole, is that it?"

"I-if you don't mind," Rarity said timidly.

Blueblood stomped off up the stairs. He grabbed the letter and stormed back down to the living room. "Here." He tossed the letter at Rarity's hooves. "This is why."

Rarity uncrumpled the ball of paper and smoothed it out. After a moment she stopped. "Ah. I got burned by these ponies, too." Then she looked up at Blueblood. "Wait, how would this-"

"Keep reading," Blueblood told her.

Rarity turned back to the letter. When she got to the end, she recoiled. "Mon Celestia!" She looked back up at Blueblood. "Is this... did you give away-"

"Almost my entire stipend, yes."

Rarity blinked. "But, why?"

Blueblood exhaled through his teeth. "Because I don't want it. This house-" he motioned around him, "this is what I grew up in. After having spent the first twelve years of my life in a hovel like this, near the bottom of the bottom, this is where I feel the most right. When Celestia noticed my skills with language, I was forced to live with her by my father so that my life could mean something. My old friends either left me or started begging me for money. Any new friends I tried to make wanted nothing to do with the street rat Celestia picked up in an alleyway. That left three people who'd associate with me: my legal guardian, my sister, and my little brother."

Blueblood sat. "I was eventually named Equestria's Supreme Ambassador-at-Large. That's how I came to be called a prince. I spend eleven months a year in foreign hostels, the only place where I feel like I'm not costing anypony too much money. Occasionally I get called back back when either 'Aunt' Celestia or Cadance decide I need to mingle with the inbreeds again." He sighed. "And I tried helping the poor. I built a hospital and helped forgive a few debts. But then the hospital closed after 'too many thefts' and a friend of mine..."

Blueblood tapered off. Before Rarity could say anything, he cleared his throat. "I still can't stop thinking about the issue. Since I've proven I can't handle money, I give it all away to some group that can. I don't really care to who. I've lived like this before; I can do it again." He sighed. "And, here I am: cold, hungry, and still not at peace."

Blueblood lay down, frowning into the fire. He said nothing, just sat miserably.

"You don't have to be cold."

Blueblood turned to his guest. "You said you needed wire for your heater?" Rarity asked. "If you can get it out from under the rubble, several of my dresses have wire in them."

Blueblood turned his gaze to the ceiling above the pile. He couldn't see any signs of another collapse. "You spent a lot of time on those dresses," he said to Rarity.

"They're useless now," she told him. "You might as well take them apart."

<*>

Blueblood closed up the panel. "IS IT WORKING?" he called down.

"YES!" Rarity called back up.

Blueblood crawled down the attic ladder and back onto the second floor. "Thanks for the wire."

"You're welcome." There was a pause. "You're surprisingly handy," she continued. "You sort of cook, and you know how to do maintenance. What else can you do?"

Blueblood descended the staircase. "I can speak five languages, nothing fancy, I can start a fire in almost any condition, and I know first aid." He laid down. "Not a whole lot of high-class stuff like wine appreciation or jousting." He sipped his half of the soup and smiled at Rarity. "I'm not the prince you were looking for, am I? All patents of nobility and old money and all."

"I wasn't really looking for money," Rarity said, "although that wouldn't have been a bad thing. Mostly I was just looking for a gentleman: somepony who'd treat me like a princess, who'd lavish me with affection every day and remind me of how he's lucky I came into his life. Who'd let me take dote on him when I could and who'd grow wrinkled and grey with me." Rarity blushed. "It was a little silly in hindsight. I do owe you an apology for making presumptions about you without getting to know you first. And for barging in on you tonight. I promise I'll repay you for everything I've taken."

Do you really need it?

Blueblood made a noise as if to speak, but nothing came out. Rarity frowned for a moment, but then her eyes widened. "I can pay to have your home repaired, if that would help." Rarity proposed. "Do you know anypony who could use the work and would appreciate fair wages for services rendered?"

Blueblood looked into Rarity's eyes, but only saw sincerity. Then he put a hoof to his chin, pondering the question. However, after a few moments, Blueblood could find nothing. He broke into a relieved smile. "I can think of a few names. However, I think I'll tell you in the morning."

Rarity smiled. "Very well. I should probably be retiring, too." She pulled the blanket over her. "Good night, your highness."

Blueblood bowed his head. "Good night, Miss Rarity." He walked for the stairs, but quickly stopped. "Thank you."

"You're very welcome."

Author's Note

I wanted to make Blueblood sound like Cary Elwes; I'm not sure I succeeded. Curse my grasp of human languages. In any case, a chapter has been released for this month, I await your comments, compliments, and criticisms. And I get the sinking feeling that Applejack may have been overhyped... In any case, next month, Rainbow Dash!

(I hope.)

Blueblood the Catchy - Rarity II

Spike trotted into the library of the crystal palace with a smile on his face. “Morning, Twilight,” he called out. “Have fun reorganizing things?”

He turned around a bookshelf and saw Twilight lifting her head out of a pile of scrolls on a table. Despite the dark bags under her eyes, she smiled when she saw him. “Hey, Spike,” she replied. “Yeah, I think I’m off to a good start. Enjoy your sleepover?”

’You could have helped her, instead of-’

“Yep,” Spike said, not missing a beat as he walked over and pulled some of the scrolls to the side. “I got to show the guys that juggling trick Blueblood taught me. Plus, Snips’s dad knows how to juggle chainsaws, so that was fun to watch. Don’t worry,” Spike said as Twilight’s mouth opened, “he didn’t let us try anything.”

Twilight yawned. “Aw-huuuuuuuuh- awesome.”

“So, you want breakfast?” Spike asked.

Twilight shook her head. “That’s alright,” she said. “I think I’ll just make myself some coffee and go to bed.”

’You should make that fo-‘

“Okey-dokey,” Spike said. “See you in a couple hours.” He turned and walked to the library door, but then stopped. “Oh,” he said as he turned around, still smiling. “I noticed that Rarity was looking especially ravishing today. Who’s the lucky guy?”

Twilight’s blank face suddenly sprouted an overlarge grin. “Oh, you know,” she said. “Just some random guy she found at some random event who’s really nothing to worry about. You just take the day off, mister.”

’OK, what’s going on?’

Spike frowned at Twilight. “Really?” Spike asked. “Just some random guy?”

Twilight’s grin vanished. “Look, Spike, it’s her personal business. It doesn’t matter who she’s going out with.”

“Then why aren’t you telling me?” Spike asked. “If it’s no big deal, then why are you scared about what I might think? I dealt with Trenderhoof no sweat.”

Spike bared down on Twilight as she sweated. “Well…” she said. “It’s just…” Her eyes crossed Spike’s once more before she lost her will to fight him and crumpled. “It’s Blueblood,” she murmured. “They met up again and…”

’You spent how much on that dress? Do you know how many poor people that could’ve fed?’

Spike shook his head. ‘No,’ he thought. ‘He doesn’t do that. She… probably knows what she’s-‘

Then he saw Rarity sobbing at some Canterlot fountain, sprawled out so that her dress was dipping into the water. Her body heaved up and down as her mascara ran down her face. Off to the side was a white, blond stallion frowning at her. “Now I know you’re distraught,” he said, “but you should probably know that wearing bangles is insensitive to…”

Spike sped out the door. “Spike, wait!” Twilight called. She took to her wings, but she soon crashed after one exhausted quiver too many. “Uh, AT LEAST PICK UP THE DRY CLEANING WHILE I… THINK OF SOMETHING!”

“WE DON’T HAVE ANY DRY CLEANING!” Spike snapped over his shoulder. ‘Hold on, Rarity,’ he thought, ‘you have no idea what you’re getting yourself into.’

<*>

Blueblood turned off the water. While he didn’t care too much about the rest of his house, the shower was required for his position. Thus, he stepped from a filthy tub onto warped floorboards and dried himself with a clean-ish towel from an exposed pipe. Then he dropped the towel in an old recycling bin and stepped out into the hall. The place was filthy, but that didn’t matter. It was going to be brought up to code soon anyways.

’Not like you need it,’ he thought to himself. ’You can give it to somepony-’

Blueblood stopped. “No,” he told himself. “This is your house. You will live here. Only you.”

Somepony knocked at the door. Blueblood started, then dashed into the kitchen. The clock on the broken stove still worked, and read eleven. “Shoot!” Blueblood spat. “I’ll be right out!” he shouted to the door. Then he dove into his closet and pulled on his suit, recently laundered so it was as white as he was. Briefly checking to see if his bowtie was straight, he walked over to the door and pulled it open.

Standing there was a gold earth stallion. Blueblood opened his mouth, but then it hung open as a name matched itself to the stallion: Gold Leaf. Gold Leaf did the same, staring back at Blueblood with an expression Blueblood couldn’t interpret. The two stallions stared at each other, both attempting to speak, but with no words coming out of their mouths. A few moments later, though, Gold Leaf straightened up a little. “Fancy party?” he asked.

“No, I just want to look good,” he stated. “I’ve got a lunch date.”

The other stallion smiled. “Lucky dog,” he said. “We always did think you’d be a great boyfriend once you settled down.”

’Word choice.’

“Actually, Gold Leaf, we’re just hanging out,” Blueblood clarified. “Nothing romantic.”

Gold Leaf snorted. “Riiiight,” he said.

“Hello, Blueblood.”

Blueblood looked up. There was Rarity, dressed up in a simple lavender dress, trimmed with white lace. Around one of her forelegs was a very nice silver watch shaped like a heart and next to her was a wicker basket. She smiled at him. “I see you’re ready for our date.”

Inwardly, Blueblood winced at the contradiction he’d created. Outwardly, though, he nodded. “Of course,” he said. He walked forward, then he stopped. He looked back at his house. It was a moldering hunk of junk, with holes in the walls and the floor, paint allowed to peel off, and windows either cracked or missing. Still, it hadn’t served him that badly. He could probably find something to patch the bigger holes with, and if he couldn’t-

Rarity grabbed him by the ear with her magic and pulled him out the door. “Oh, you don’t have to worry about a thing,” she said. “After all, you recommended these people to me. The finest and most cost-effective renovators in Canterlot, you said.”

Gold Leaf stared at Blueblood for a moment, then smiled and tipped his hard hat to Rarity. “It’s true, ma’am,” he said. “My team has a knack for pulling off miracles under budget. Trust me, whatever we have to do to this house, it’ll be fine.”

“Excellent,” Rarity said, dragging Blueblood onwards. “Well, it’s time for us to be going. Take care, boys.”

She gave the workers a little wave, and they all immediately straightened up and waved back. As she kept moving, Rarity continued to drag Blueblood by the ear until they turned a corner. Then she let go. “Are you alright?” she asked.

’That’s a rhetorical question.’

“Yes, I’m fine,” Blueblood said.

“You can tell me the truth,” Rarity clarified with a smile. “This is all for you, after all.”

Blueblood bit his lip, and nothing came out of his mouth for several long seconds. Rarity kept smiling at him, but it started to lessen.

’She’s waiting for an answer.’

Blueblood exhaled. “OK, I’m a little bothered,” he said. “I just keep thinking about all the ponies without homes that I could be spending this money on.”

“That’s alright,” Rarity said. “That’s why you’re going out with me today: to help take your mind off of it.”

“Yes,” Blueblood admitted. “Yes, that’s right.” He took a deep breath, then he sighed. “But now I can’t stop thinking about how much damage they might find. And I’m counting out how many ponies I could’ve fed.”

“Perhaps this can help,” Rarity offered. “You’re helping pay these ponies’ wages, which pay for their meals and their homes. Furthermore, you’re not just paying ponies who want to do this work. This company also employs ponies who might not be able to find jobs elsewhere because they don’t have the skills or they have minor offenses that no-one else is willing to forgive. You might not be helping them directly this time, but you are helping them help themselves, which is much better for them.”

Blueblood frowned at her, but he meditated on what she said. At first, he wasn’t convinced. With a little repetition, though, the thought came more easily to him, and he started accepting it more. Eventually, his nerves settled just enough. “I think that’ll take the edge off,” he said.

Rarity patted him on the cheek. “Just tell me if you need anything else,” she said.

She turned, and the two continued down the street. “So, how are you?” Blueblood asked.

“I’m well,” Rarity said. “I’ve finally been declared flu-free and I can talk without coughing.”

“That’s good,” Blueblood said. “How’s Spike?”

Rarity turned to stare at him. “He’s… he’s fine,” Rarity said. “You haven’t heard from him?”

“We don’t hang out much.”

The two ponies spun around. Standing a few feet away, his arms crossed in front of him and a frown on his face, was Spike. The two men shared a series of glances before Spike’s face settled back into a soft frown. “So, you’re… back in Equestria,” Spike mused.

Blueblood looked at Rarity, who shrugged. Then he turned back to Spike. “Yes,” he said. He cleared his throat. “Well, it’s been a while.”

Spike nodded. “Years.”

Blueblood waited, but Spike said nothing. “So,” Blueblood said, “I heard you saved the Crystal Empire.”

“With Twilight’s help,” Spike added. “But yeah, I did.”

’You could have been there. You should have been there.’

Blueblood opened his mouth, but one glare from Spike quickly closed it. “So, Spike,” Rarity said, “what are you doing here? Not that you’re not welcome to come along, of course, but what brings you out to Canterlot?”

“Nothing,” Spike said. “Just thought I’d revisit some old friends and hang out at the arcade again. How ‘bout you two?”

“Well,” Rarity said, “we’re just going to the park for a picnic. Nothing fancy.”

On the edge of his hearing, Blueblood could hear Spike rumble something that sounded like ‘cheapskate.’ “I’m actually having my house renovated,” Blueblood announced. “We’re getting out of the house.”

Spike stopped and stared at Blueblood. “Wait,” he said, “you’re actually… paying for someone to fix your house?”

Blueblood winced, but he nodded. “I ran out of things I could do with alley scraps,” he said. “Incidentally, I was thinking of taking Rarity to the opera when the workers start work.”

Now Rarity turned to stare at his complete seriousness. “Seriously?” she asked.

“I do have my less miserly moments,” Blueblood explained. “And I actually find opera quite soothingly epic.”

Rarity beamed at him. “Not everypony sees that,” she said. “Granted, I can see why, but most ponies just go there to socialize.”

Blueblood chuckled. “Perhaps if the lyrics were in English, they might pay more attention.”

“Well,” Rarity admitted, “that is part of the reason I prefer musicals.”

“I’ve been to a few of those recently,” Blueblood said.

“Waitwaitwaitwaitwait!” Spike exclaimed. “You’ve been going out? To see plays? And OPERA?”

Blueblood nodded. “Well, not quite so recently, but a few months ago I had a bit of a social life.”

“He did,” Rarity confirmed. “I actually saw him a few times. Even if he didn’t see me.” She turned back to Spike. “He didn’t do that?”

For a few moments, Spike could only blink and walk. “Not willingly,” he said. He frowned at Blueblood again. “Cadance made you do it,” he accused.

“No,” Blueblood replied. “I was actually doing very well for myself.”

Spike stared at him. “Whoa.” His frown returned. “Was?”

“Excuse me, miss?”

Blueblood’s heart sank at the sight of the beggar stallion, a unicorn, walking up to them. His clothing wasn’t threadbare and his only sign of poor hygiene was a slight odor, but what disheartened Blueblood was his face. Emanating from it was a blend of apology and desperation that Blueblood had memorized through his formative years. “I don’t want to bother you,” he said, “but I’m three months behind on my rent and I’m about to get evicted. If you have anything you can give me, I’d be ever so grateful.”

Rarity’s hoof raised over her mouth. “Oh. Certainly.” Rarity reached into her pocket and pulled out a small gem. “Here you go.”

The beggar stared at it as if it were a blank check from Celestia herself before gently taking it from her. “Thank you,” the beggar breathed. “Celestia bless you.” Then he turned and walked away.

’He’s marked now.’

As the three walked off, Blueblood frowned, his tongue between his teeth. Spike rolled his eyes and looked away. After a moment, Rarity looked back. “Is there a problem?” she asked Blueblood.

Blueblood almost blushed as he cleared his throat. “It’s not safe to do that,” he said. “For him. If anypony else finds out he has that, he’s going to be a very big target.”

Rarity frowned at him, opening her mouth, but then her frown faded and she shut her mouth again. “Thank you,” she said. “I didn’t know that.”

She turned back ahead, but Blueblood could sense gloom around her. He felt Spike dig him in the ribs. “Nice going,” he grumbled.

Blueblood walked up next to Rarity. “It’s OK,” he said. “I did that too.”

“I just wish I could do something for him.” Rarity sighed. “But I guess no matter how much money I give, there always seem to be ponies who won’t get any of it. I just wish I could do more.”

’You could be doing more. You have a home, he doesn’t.’

Blueblood slapped himself in the head. ‘No,’ he thought to himself. ‘He is not sleeping in your house.’

Spike walked up to Rarity. “You’re doing everything you can,” he said. “There’s just a lot you can’t do. That nopony can do,” he quickly clarified. “So don’t beat yourself up just for doing your best.”

The silence hung in the air for a second before Rarity mumbled thanks and kept walking. Spike slowed to a halt, staring after her briefly, before he sighed and hung his head. Blueblood walked forward, but Spike looked up and scowled at him. “I’m fine,” he growled.

Blueblood nodded. “Understood,” he said.

Spike turned and stomped off. His heart sinking, Blueblood drifted into a memory.

<*>

“Alright, Blueblood, I finished straightening up the bathroom.”

Blueblood looked up from his dust rag. Even though her wards lived in a castle, they were still in charge of keeping their own rooms clean. Since some sort of company was expected later that day, Celestia had ordered her charges to clean up, the ponies in charge of their rooms and Spike in the bathroom. Spike seemed to be finished, though, since he was now in the doorway lightly flecked with sweat and tossing a hoofball up in the air. “You want to look at my project before we start playing?” he asked.

‘Run down the list.’

“Did you wipe down the faucets?” he asked.

Spike groaned. “Yes,” he said.

“You put the toothbrushes away?”

“In the right places.”

“You swept under the rug?”

Spike’s claw met his face. “Yes. Now can we-“

“Did you organize the soap?”

Spike just stared at him as the hoofball fell onto the floor. “What?” he asked.

“The soap,” Blueblood repeated. “Did you put it in a different corner than the shampoo and conditioner?”

Spike growled. “It doesn’t matter!” he snapped. “It wasn’t on the list!”

Blueblood bit his lip as the image of a regal yak tearing his bathroom apart filled his head. Eventually, though, his heart came too close to bursting. “What if-“

“It doesn- ugh!” Spike spun on his foot. “Fine,” he grumbled as he stalked off, “I’ll organize the freaking soap.”

Spike stomped off down the hall. Blueblood lifted his hoof, but couldn’t move himself forward. Instead, he smacked himself hard on the head and picked up the dust rag again. Then he noticed the black stain on one side of the dust rag. He brought the rag closer to his eyes; the stain looked like oil. Blueblood’s face puckered up as he tossed the dust rag into the hamper. Then he walked through the bathroom into Cadance and Spike’s room.

Sitting on Cadance’s desk was a volcano, which Blueblood couldn’t help but admire. It was a beautiful thing, tall and even molded with little caves and vents. A small forest of green Q-tips surrounded the base, cut through with a river of blue tissue paper. Dotted around the volcano were dragons: two action figures and one small figurine Blueblood thought he’d seen Shining Armor playing with. “Wow,” Blueblood muttered with a smile.

‘Did he get everything? He could have forgotten to sign his name.’

Rigidly and slowly, Blueblood bent over and checked the bottom. Sure enough, in flawless clawwriting on the bottom was ‘Spike; Mrs. Data Set, period 6.’ For good measure, Blueblood checked inside the cone and found the explanation cards, all impeccably written, neatly rolled up around the baking soda, vinegar, and food coloring. Blueblood nodded to himself. “Good jo-“

‘That’s his science fair project? A baking soda volcano? He’ll get eaten alive.’

‘He’s in the first grade; his teacher’ll probably go easy on him.’

‘Remember when you had her class? What exactly she said?’

‘It looks fantastic. His teacher’s bound to give him points for that.’

‘What if everyone else did just as well? He’ll have to start over.’

‘But he worked so hard on it, and I’ve pushed him hard enough about his chores today. He’ll be crushed.’

‘Do you want him to fail?’

“Alright, I organized the so-”

Blueblood made himself smile, then turned around. Spike’s eyes had widened as he looked from Blueblood to the volcano. “You saw it?”

Blueblood nodded. “Yes, I did,” he said. “It’s beautiful.”

Spike stared at him for a moment before he started beaming. “Is it gonna’ clean up or what?”

‘You’ll break his heart.’

‘You’ll fail him.’

Spike’s face gradually fell as Blueblood’s tongue failed to unlock. Eventually, Spike looked down at the floor and sighed. “Alright, what’s wrong with it?” he moaned.

Blueblood felt his heart breaking as he opened his mouth. “Well,” he started, “i-it’s a wonderful volcano, but… the thing is-“

“It’s a volcano,” Spike murmured, the light having gone out of his eyes. “Everyone’s already done one, and nopony wants to see another one.” Spike trudged over to the volcano and raised it over his head.

“No!” Blueblood grabbed it before Spike could bring it down. “It looks wonderful,” Blueblood restated. “Just show it to Mrs. Set and see if she’d let you enter it.”

Spike looked up at his older brother. “You think she would?”

‘Don’t lie to him.’

‘Don’t hurt him.’

Spike sighed again as he turned around. “I guess not.” He walked to the door.

“Wait!” Blueblood said, putting the volcano on his bed. “Where’re you going?”

”To go find Twilight. Looks like I need to make another project.”

Spike slammed the door on his way out. Blueblood started towards the door, then stopped and fell backwards onto his tail. He lasted all of three seconds before the tears started rolling down his cheeks. ‘I’m sorry, Spike,’ he thought to himself. ‘I’m so sorry.’

“Blueblood?”

<*>

“Blueblood?”

Blueblood shook himself as he returned to reality. Standing in front of him was Rarity, one of her hooves on his cheek. “Are you alright?”

Blueblood noticed Spike standing off to the side, looking at him softly. Blueblood turned his eyes back to Rarity. “Yeah,” he said. “Just having a flashback.” He cleared his throat and straightened up. “Let’s keep moving.”

Within a few minutes, they had arrived at the Daylight City Park. It wasn’t a very big park, consisting mostly of a lawn, a tree, and a few picnic tables, but it was still watered and maintained well-enough to look pleasant. The three sat down at one of the benches and Rarity opened the basket. To Blueblood’s relief, she only brought out plates and sandwiches, and simple ones at that. She put one of the sandwiches on a plate and passed it to Spike, who started scarfing it down almost instantly. Then she passed a plate and sandwich to him. Blueblood looked at it, then smelled it. It was indeed simple: just a few vegetables on ordinary white bread, but a few spices helped make it smell quite bold. He opened his mouth.

“Excuse me.”

Blueblood felt the bottom drop out of his stomach as somepony walked up next to him. “I don’t want to bother you,” the young stallion continued, “but I haven’t eaten in three days. If you could just-“

Blueblood pushed his sandwich over. He didn’t look up as the stallion thanked him and retreated. He tried to keep his head down as he felt the gaze of his two lunchmates continue. Finally, he had enough and looked up. As he’d thought, Spike had turned away and was tearing into his own lunch with a scowl. Rarity was frowning at him, but the only emotion Blueblood could see was pity. “Don’t,” Blueblood moaned as Rarity offered her sandwich. “That’s yours.”

“Hey, that’s a nice watch you’re wearing, miss.”

Blueblood instantly perked up. A blue unicorn stallion had walked up to them, a little unwashed, but otherwise unspectacular. Rarity shifted her watch away from him. “It’s not for sale,” she told him.

The stallion magicked up a knife. “That wasn’t a question,” he said.

“Hey!” Spike snapped. “Back-“

The mugger smacked Spike with the knife’s pommel, sending him tumbling off the bench. In the next instant, from Blueblood’s reckoning, a police officer was approaching as Rarity stood between him and the unconscious mugger. “It’s alright, Blueblood,” she assured him. “It’s OK. Spike’s alright. Aren’t you, Spike?”

“Yeah,” Spike groaned. “Just a little bump. It’ll-ow!”

The fire in Blueblood’s veins instantly turned to ice. He whipped around and started towards Spike. He stopped almost instantly, though, when he saw that Spike was just putting rubbing the wound, which wasn’t even bleeding.

’He might have a concussion.’

Blueblood knelt down and looked at Spike’s head. “How do you-“

Spike pushed him away. “I’m fine!” he snapped. “Vision: fine! Hearing: fine! Memory: fine! I just. Got. Bonked. On. The head! No big deal, OK? You can stop hovering over me!”

Blueblood backed up. “OK,” he said. “I ju-“

”Don’t,” Spike snarled. “I don’t want your help. It ever occur to you that all your ‘help’ did was hurt me? You know how embarrassing it was to have your brother treat a papercut like a mortar wound? And there was my science fair volcano. I spent days on it and you just picked it apart!”

Blueblood glared at him. “I didn-“

“No ‘good job, Spike’,” Spike continued, “just ‘it’s useless, find something else’!” Spike rolled his eyes. “Why can’t you just switch off for three little seconds?”

Blueblood stomped his hooves. “I’m TRYING!” he snapped. “I’m sorry, but I can’t just ‘switch off’! You know what it feels like to have your conscience latch on to every little thing you could be doing just because you haven’t passed out yet?”

Green sparks flared out of Spike’s nostrils. “YES!” he shouted. “All the freaking time! I volunteered to serve as a pincushion! I started a fight with an owl… I repeat, an OWL… who I thought was going to take my job! Not to mention the time I indentured myself to Applejack. Yeah, and that’s between being maid, cook, and forklift! You know how long it’s been since I had a day to goof off? FOREVER! Sometimes I don’t even know what I’d do with it!”

Spike stopped for a moment, his mouth silently working up and down for a few seconds. Then he took a deep breath. “I want to goof off,” he started up again. “I want to relax. But every time I get a chance, I can hear your little voice yammering away in my head about how Rarity might get jaundice from a rusty pin or Twilight might get buried in a book avalanche! Twilight still invents things for me to do because she’s scared I’m going to go crazy again. Congratulations, brother, I’m crazy! You did it.”

Blueblood’s mouth gaped open several times during his brother’s tirade, but he couldn’t think of anything to say. Eventually, his imagination started in, splicing images of Spike run as ragged as he was among memories of minor scrapes and inane requests. Blueblood could feel a tear work its way down his cheek. Several times more, he tried to speak, but his aborted attempts just devolved into a silent sobbing. All the time, the voice in his head kept speaking the same thing over and over.

’You are such an idiot.’

Blueblood didn’t quite lose himself. He was aware that Spike and Rarity were talking next to him, but he didn’t care. He didn’t want to care. All he wanted to do was curl up and disappear. Just have nothing left to get caught on.

Something poked him in the side of the head. Blueblood tried to ignore it, but it continued to bother him. Finally, he turned to face it. Spike was standing there, a little hunched over and his limbs pulled close to his body. “Blueblood?” he asked softly. “Are you OK?”

Blueblood turned away and let himself drop onto his stomach. “I’m sorry, Spike,” he breathed. “I turned you into me.” Blueblood laid his head down and sighed. For a moment, there was just silence.

“…well, not really.” Spike knelt down next to Blueblood’s head. “I mean, I live in a crystal palace and I talk to othe…”

Spike trailed off, but Blueblood’s blank expression had turned into a small scowl. “Good for you,” Blueblood muttered. “I didn’t succeed.”

Spike winced. “Blueblood, I’m sorry,” he said. “I know you love me, and I’m really glad you leapt in back there. It’s just, you can get a little hard to live with sometimes.”

“Especially when I’m in your head all the time,” Blueblood rumbled.

“It comes and goes,” Spike replied. “I can count on one claw the number of times recently that it actually got out of hoof. Like just now. Most of the time, though, I can tune it out just fine, and it’s not the only thing I remember you for. I got to show a bunch of other ponies that juggling thing you taught me. Remember?”

Blueblood heard Spike dart off. As he tilted his head up, he saw Spike dart around the park picking up small rocks. Once he had three or four, he walked back over to Blueblood. Then he started tossing them from one claw to the other. After a few seconds of that, he started passing them in a figure eight, then in crossing arcs. Gradually, the pattern became more and more complicated, crossing over and under legs and arms until it ended with Spike tossing one of the rocks into the air. Blueblood moved to get up, but he felt something tug on his tail long enough for Spike to catch one of the rocks in his mouth and swallow it. Spike spread out his arms. “See?”

Blueblood turned around. Rarity released her hold on his tail. “Spike didn’t talk about you that much,” she said. “However, about half of what he said was good, and that’s better than what I used to average with my little sister.”

“Wait,” Blueblood said, “you knew me before the Gala?”

“No,” Rarity said. “Blueblood’s kind of a common name for royalty, and Spike said you wouldn’t be there.”

“Wait a minute!”

The two ponies turned to Spike, who was frowning at Blueblood. “You were the jerk at the Gala?” he asked.

An image of cake fluttered into Blueblood’s mind. Sadly, he nodded. “Yes,” he said. “I was, and I’m sorry.”

Spike stared at Blueblood for a moment, face shifting between two different emotions. Then he stomped forward, walking right up to Blueblood’s barrel. Blueblood wanted to look away, but he forced his eyes to stay on Spike’s. Spike just looked back up at Blueblood. Then Spike scowled and kicked him in the leg.

“Ow!” Blueblood yelped as he lifted the injured leg and rubbed it against himself.

“That’s for being a jerk,” Spike told him. Then, before Blueblood could say anything, Spike hopped up and put his arms around his neck. “And that’s for going in the first place.”

Blueblood stood rigidly for a moment before he looked up at Rarity. She said nothing, merely motioning towards Spike with her hoof, a small smile on her face. Thus, Blueblood lifted his leg and draped it around Spike. “Thanks,” Blueblood said. “So I have your blessing to date Rarity?” he whispered.

“We’ll see,” Spike said.

<*>

Rarity bought lunch from a taco cart. After an extended lunch, Blueblood and Rarity moved to head back to Blueblood’s house and Spike tagged along. At the corner before the house, though, Blueblood stopped. “Spike,” he said, “I just want to warn you…”

“Sweet Celestia!”

Spike hadn’t stopped moving. Instead, he had gone on, and now he was staring at the cracked, dingy dump that was Blueblood’s house. Gold Leaf half-stumbled out of the house. Then he noticed Blueblood. He stared for a moment, then scowled, then stormed over. “I don’t believe you,” he remarked.

Blueblood stopped, a weight dropping into his stomach. “It’s not fixable, is it?” he asked.

“It’s uninhabitable,” Gold Leaf snapped. “As the floor collapse should have demonstrated. It’d be cheaper to just knock the whole thing down and build another house, which is something we don’t have the permits to do.” He groaned. “Blueblood, why didn’t you say anything? I could’ve-”

“Excuse me,” Spike asked, a glint in his eye. “Who’re you?”

Gold Leaf whipped around to see Spike, but halted. Then he put his face in his hoof and groaned. “You’re right,” he moaned. “Blueblood… I’m sorry. Don’t,” he told Blueblood, putting his hoof up. “Don’t you forgive me; I don’t deserve it.”

“What’s going on?” Rarity asked.

Gold Leaf turned to Rarity with a blush. “I used to know him,” he said. “However, once he started living with the Princess, I…” he hung his head again. “I was such an idiot.”

Blueblood patted Gold Leaf on the back. “Look, it was a long time ago,” Blueblood said. “Now what’s going to happen to the house?”

Gold Leaf brought his head back up and stared into Blueblood’s eyes for a moment. Then he cleared his throat. “Well, we know a good demolition company. They can get the permits and stuff cleared away. As for right now, I’d recommend finding somewhere else to live for the moment. No charge for the inspection. It’s on me.”

Blueblood shut his mouth, paused for a moment, then nodded. “Alright. Thanks, Goldie.”

Gold Leaf smiled for a moment, then turned back to his men. “Alright, folks,” he called, “pack it up!”

Blueblood turned back to Spike and Rarity. Spike took his head out of one of his claws. “If you need a place to stay,” Spike offered, “I... the castle has a few open rooms.”

“And if those accomodations are too flashy,” Rarity said, “I know a few ponies who’d be happy to have you room with them.”

“Twilight and I can gunge up the castle a little if you want. I’m sure there’s a rat running around we could let loose.”

Blueblood chuckled a little. “Thank you,” he said. “Spike…”

’You’ll make him uncomfortable.’

“…if you don’t mind,” Blueblood continued, “can I stay with you?”

Spike looked into Blueblood’s eyes for a moment, then nodded. “Sure.”

Author's Note

So sorry this is late! As I said, I had an upper respiratory illness. However, I also lost interest in what I was doing and I found this chapter really hard to do. You could possibly blame hayfever for that.

However, I got to see Zootopia. Twice, no less. It was a good movie: funny, beautiful, a little unpredictable, even moralizing without being overly preachy. Would love to see more of that world and those characters.

As always, comments are welcome.

Blueblood the Avenger - Rainbow Dash

"Looking for something, Twi-lens?"

A young Twilight Sparkle bumped her head on the bench she had crawled under. She swiftly scooched her way out from under the bench, her heart stopping when she turned around. Standing in front of her was an older unicorn filly: Kelliset. Her pelt was deep yellow and her mane and eyes were light blue. Her horn glowed blue as she waved a book in front of her. "And I thought you were a responsible filly," she said.

Twilight tried to magically grab the book, but the blue aura blocked it out. "Ah ah ah," Kelliset tutted. "If you can't take care of your library books, you shouldn't have them." Kelliset then took the book and stuffed it in her saddlebags.

"Kelliset, wait!" Twilight ran after her, but Kelliset shoved her away. "I need that book!" Twilight cried. "It's almost overdue!"

"Well, too bad," Kelliset told her. "You know the rules: you're responsible for whatever happens to this book, including theft. Guess you're going to have to pay for it."

"OK, how much?"

Kelliset and Twilight turned around. Standing little ways away was a teenaged white unicorn with a black eye and a smile. Kelliset snorted. "Hello, Blueblood," she said. "Did the track team beat you up again?"

Blueblood kept smiling. "Not all of them," he said easily. "Shining Armor ran screaming for the coach as soon as the fight started." He giggled. "And he thinks he's going to be a royal guard when he grows up."

Twilight frowned at Blueblood, but kept her mouth shut. Kelliset, however, continued. "Yeah, that scrawny little nerd thinking he has a chance? Though he'd at least be better at it than you. You can't even beat ponies that run track. Didn't your mother take on twelve guards at once?"

Blueblood's smile wavered for a moment, but remained in place. "I'm not completely useless," he said, his voice straining. "I'm very good at getting even."

Kelliset snorted. "Have to take after one of your parents, I guess. Well, au revoir, Prince Blueblood."

She gave an exaggerated bow, then turned and strutted away. Blueblood scowled after her for a long moment, then turned to Twilight. "Can I have one of your hairs?" he asked.

Twilight's brow furled. "Why? Ow!"

"Just watch." Blueblood held the hair in his teeth. Then he pulled out a stinkbomb as his horn lit up. "Just got to work a little sympathetic teleportation..." There was a bright flash of light, which forced Twilight to avert her eyes for a moment. When it was done, he held out his hoof. "Is this yours?"

Twilight seized the book out of his hoof and pressed it to her heart. "THANK CELESTIA!" She stuffed it into her bookbag, then launched herself onto Blueblood. "Thanky-"

"Owowow!"

Twilight recoiled. "Oh! Sorry! How're you doing?"

"Better," Blueblood said, holding his side. "The bruising on my rib's gone down at least."

"Good." Twilight paused. "Blueblood, what are you planning?"

"Nothing." Blueblood smiled coldly. "At least, nothing that won't come off in time."

Twilight frowned. "Shiny isn't going to get hit with it, is he?"

"Don't worry, Twilight," Blueblood assured her. "I told him to give the showers a wide berth for the next few days. He'll be fine."

Twilight's frown remained, but it softened a little. "OK, Blueblood," she said. "Have you thought about just transferring out?"

Blueblood scowled at her. "Why do you think I'm here?"

"Oh." Twilight averted her eyes. "Sorry."

Blueblood sighed. "That's alright. Problem is, having my parents..."

He trailed off. Twilight waited for him to speak, but the silence only stretched on. Finally, Twilight cleared her throat. "So," she said, "that's a new spell."

Blueblood looked back at her. "Celestia taught it to me." He smiled again. "I'm really good at it. I can even teleport a bowling ball across the school campus."

Twilight's eyebrow rose. "That's oddly specific."

Blueblood chuckled. "Well, it involved Brobdingnag..."

<<*>>

Blueblood stormed down the hallway, mane bedraggled and a cloud of rage hovering over him. Last night had been going so well. Find rich ponce, induce irritation, leave, wait for Celestia to find his surprise. That had worked for the past several years. This year, however, something had gone wrong, something that could have easily been prevented.

"Hello, Prince Blueblunder!"

Blueblood growled as the grey, grinning, and geriatric earth stallion sauntered up to him. "Just heard about last night," the stallion said. "Your parents would've been so proud."

"Don't you have a poor box to spit in?" Blueblood asked.

The stallion ignored him. "Just imagine how they'd feel knowing that their son, the son of Grandmaster, turned one of the Elements of Harmony and one of Celestia's royal guests into his personal chew toy! What do you do all day when you're supposed to working?"

"I-"

"Well, I'd wish you good luck, but nothing's going to save you from being out on your plot this time next week. Ta ta!"

The stallion marched off, and Blueblood had to summon all of his strength not to throw something at him. "No," he told himself. "No. You can hide a rotten egg in his room later." Blueblood took a deep breath and continued on down the corridor.

<<*>>

"So, how'd your date go?"

Rarity set the cup down. "I told you before, Rainbow Dash, I don't want to talk about it."

Seven ponies sat around the breakfast table: Princess Celestia and her guests. Rainbow Dash snickered. "C'mon, Rares," she pleaded. "So he forgot to use his napkin. Big whoop!"

Rarity glared at Rainbow Dash. "He held me in front of a flying cake!" Rarity groaned. "How a brat like that became a prince, I'll never know."

Celestia looked up. "Prince?" she asked.

"Yes, your highness, and a less fitting candidate for the position I have never seen! He's rude, selfish, arrogant, vain, and so-"

The doors slammed open, which caused Fluttershy to jump and everypony to turn. Stomping through the door was a white unicorn with a ragged blond mane. "Aunt Celestia," he growled, "we need to talk about last night."

"You!" Rarity shouted as she rose to her hooves. "You swine!" She stomped over to him. "After everything you put me through last night you have the gall to-"

"Rarity, it's alright," Princess Celestia said as she rose from her seat.

Rarity stopped as she whipped her head back around. "I beg your pardon, your highness?" she asked.

Celestia motioned forward. "Rarity, this is my nephew, Prince Blueblood. Blueblood, you're right, we do have something to talk about regarding last night."

Blueblood's glare faltered under his aunt's, and soon it had morphed into a blush. "Ah, yes." He cleared his throat. "Miss Rarity, I'm sorry for my behavior last night. Somepony," he glanced up at his aunt, "did not inform me about six very special guests, so I had to rely on her sister to find out about them."

Celestia's frown faded. "I'm sorry about that. Something came up and it just slipped my mind."

Blueblood glared at her for a moment, but eventually he closed his eyes. "Very well. Apology accepted."

"Is there anything else you need?"

Blueblood circled around the other ponies as he moved next to Celestia. "Yes. As a matter of fact, I do." He turned to the chair at Celestia's right. "You're Fluttershy?"

Fluttershy gulped. "Uh, I-I am." she whimpered.

Blueblood glared at her, softly but surely. "I understand you had an interesting run-in with some of the animals. If I could borrow you for a moment-"

Rainbow Dash leapt to her hooves. "Just a minute, Prince Backside!"

"No, Rainbow Dash," Fluttershy said. "I was awful last night, and I should apologize for what I did."

Fluttershy got up and turned to Blueblood. With a brief nod to Celestia, he led Fluttershy out of the room.

Everypony turned to the head of the table. "Yer highness-"

"It's alright, Applejack," Celestia told her, quite easily. "He won't hurt her now that he knows her."

Four of the ponies looked at each other, then back to Celestia. "Forgive me, your highness," Rarity said, "but what I have seen of that... stallion, I find that a little difficult to believe."

Celestia looked over at Twilight. "She's telling the truth," Twilight told the others. "Blueblood is a pain, but he isn't... well..." Twilight paused for a moment. "...he doesn't go too far. And since he knows-"

"Twilight," Rarity interrupted her, "forgive me for interrupting, but have you forgotten last night?"

"That was partly my fault," Celestia said. "He has a personal vendetta against the ponies of Canterlot and must have assumed you were one of them. He's also not very well informed. I should have told him about you, but something came up in Seaddle and it slipped my mind."

"WHOAAAAAAAH!"

Everypony's head whipped around. Rainbow Dash jumped across the table, grabbed the bottle of milk, and chugged it down. A few seconds later, the bottle was empty and Rainbow Dash was panting. "OK," she breathed. "Twilight, I take it back. Tea is not a sissy drink."

Celestia smiled. "That is more his style. When I first met him, he was a colt who was trying to play every prank possible on me. I trained him and taught him to harness his powers for good. Well, for the most part." Celestia sheepishly smiled at Rarity.

Rarity did not return the smile, instead remaining silent for several moments. "...alright. I'll accept that. However, I thought princes were supposed to have wings and a horn?"

"Blueblood is a special case. I'd advise you to ask him about the rest. Raven, please order a new pot of tea." Celestia looked into the seat of her chair, tsked, and tossed a whoopie cushion onto the floor. Then she sat.

There was a loud snap as the chair collapsed, dropping Celestia onto the floor. The other five ponies shot out of their seats and to her side, but Celestia waved them down with a smile. "It's alright," she said. "Although I think I need a nap after this. I'm losing my touch."

<<*>>

"Rainbow Dash, you don't know what you're getting yourself into!"

"Be quiet!" Rainbow Dash hissed.

Twilight groaned. Rainbow Dash was peeking over a hedge, wearing a ghillie suit and war paint, and aiming a water gun at the Prince. Standing next to him was Fluttershy, happily letting a bird nestle in her mane. "Dash, our train leaves at two minutes past noon and you can't afford to-"

"I can fly back to Ponyville before the train gets there! Now please shut up!"

Twilight sighed at her friend. "Fine. Don't say I didn't warn you."

"Yeah, whatever, now go away!"

There was a flash of light and Twilight was gone. Rainbow Dash turned her sights back onto Blueblood. "C'mon, Fluttershy," she quietly pleaded, "move over!"

"Thank you so much, your highness," Fluttershy said.

Blueblood stroked the bird on Fluttershy's head. "Please, just call me Blueblood."

Fluttershy blushed. "Oh. Well, thank you... Blueblood."

"MOVE!," Rainbow Dash whispered.

Blueblood pulled away. "Are you going to be alright?"

Fluttershy started. "Oh, yes."

"Excellent. I think your train's about to leave."

Fluttershy's face fell. "Oh. Well, can I expect to see you again?"

Blueblood smiled. "Most probably. I'll see you then."

Fluttershy nodded. "OK." She paused. "Look, about what those ponies said-"

Blueblood's smile vanished. "I'd rather not talk about it," he said. "But thank you."

Fluttershy nodded. "You're welcome, Blueblood."

Blueblood smiled once more before he poofed away.

"DAUGH!"

Rainbow Dash spun around and pulled the trigger, but Blueblood knocked the gun out of her hooves. "That model has too short a range," Blueblood said. "However, I will credit your mastery of surprise. If you weren't making all that racket, I'd have-"

"I was not making a racket!" Rainbow Dash snapped.

Blueblood snorted. "Please. That flash almost woke the dead."

Rainbow Dash stared at him for a moment, but then snarled. "Twilight..."

"Doubtless she gave you sage advice," Blueblood said. "I assume you're Rainbow Dash? Based on what I've heard of you, you're about to play with forces beyond your ken. Putting pranking on a karate belt scale, I'd say you're a yellow, maybe an orange belt. I am a 6th-dan master."

Rainbow Dash growled, but then it broke into a smile. "Yeah, I guess it was a long shot." She put her hoof out. "Put 'er there, Blueblood-Kyoshi."

Blueblood scrutinized her, but Rainbow Dash just wiggled her hoof. Eventually, he smiled and put his hoof out. Just before contact, however, he grabbed Dash's hoof and twisted it to reveal a joy buzzer. "Really?" Blueblood asked. "I expecte-"

SPLAT!

Blueblood stood still as merangue ran down his face. Dash pointed at him. "HA! Backup plan!"

Blueblood summoned a cloth to wipe the pie off of himself. "Impressive," he said, his smile returning.

"That's at least a black belt, right?" Dash asked.

"Only about green, I'm afraid."

Rainbow Dash threw her hooves up. "Oh come on! I just outpranked a master!"

"True," Blueblood said, "and that was a genuinely impressive display of Pie-style pranking, but there are two problems. Firstly, that was with your backup plan, and secondly, look down."

Rainbow did so. She had just enough time to notice that the joy buzzer was off of her hoof before Blueblood zapped her with it. "Brown belt," Blueblood continued, "slight of hoof. Red belt, stopping slight of hoof." Blueblood let go. Rainbow Dash crumpled on the ground, wings smoking and mane going every which way. "It takes years to master the art of pranking," Blueblood told her, "and I simply have more than you do."

Rainbow Dash shook herself, and smiled. "OK, yeah, that was pretty cool." She pointed at him. "But I will get you back!"

"Not by pranking me."

"Alright, I'll race ya'." Rainbow Dash cast her gaze around for a few seconds. "How about first one to the front gate?"

"Where's the front gate?"

Rainbow Dash opened her mouth, but her face fell. "...uhh... well, just follow-"

"We're in the wrong part of the grounds: there's a thick hedge separating us from the gate. There are also several other obstacles that would make the route longer for me. Do you fence?"

"Sure!"

Blueblood's eyebrow quirked up.

"I took it in high school!" Rainbow Dash protested. "It can't be that hard to relearn!"

Blueblood kept looking at her, but Rainbow Dash didn't give. Finally, Blueblood sighed. "Alright, have it your way."

<<*>>

Five minutes later, the two stood on an island in the middle of a pond. An aide had fetched two blunted rapiers, and Blueblood twirled his expertly around the basket hilt. He momentarily dropped it, however, when he noticed Rainbow struggling to copy him. "Are you sure you want to try this?" he asked.

"Pointy end goes in the other guy. I'll pick up the rest as I go."

Blueblood rolled his eyes. "Very well. En guarde." Blueblood grasped the hilt of the weapon in his fetlock, standing on his back hooves. "You know how to do this?"

"Pfft, please." Rainbow Dash then launched herself onto her back legs, her wings moving back and out to balance. "You ready?"

Blueblood saluted with the blade. "Of course."

Rainbow Dash copied the salute. "OK, go! OW!"

Rainbow Dash hopped on one leg as Blueblood smirked at her. "How long has it been since you've done this?" he asked.

Dash put her hoof back down and raised her sword again. "Let's just go again, smart-aleck," she said.

"Alright."

Dash lasted a few more strikes before getting whacked in the side. She tried again, and lasted a little longer, but a feint from Blueblood led to a nick on her sword hoof. Round after round passed with a victory for Blueblood each time. "OK," Rainbow Dash said, "I'll admit: you're fast."

Blueblood bowed his head a mite. "Thank you. I conserve an entire day's worth of energy for moments like this. En guarde."

Blueblood swiped at Dash's left, but Dash parried it. Blueblood moved forward, Dash moved back. Head. Right leg. Forward. Left body. Feint right, lunge.

"Ow!"

Blueblood's hoof went to his side as Rainbow Dash smirked at him. "Did I mention I was the best in my class?" she boasted.

Blueblood smiled at her as he straightened up. "Well, you're remembering. But I've had practice for the past few years. You haven't."

The next point went to Blueblood, but Rainbow Dash came after that twice. Blueblood scored twice, then Dash scored twice. Then Blueblood scored once before Dash scored five times in a row. "Well," Blueblood said with a chuckle, "I guess it really is coming back to you. That or you're learning my tells."

"How do you think I got to be the best?" Dash told Blueblood. "I also did really well when the teacher brought in kids from other classes."

Blueblood smirked. "Is that a fact? Then I'm going to have to stop coddling you."

Rainbow Dash barely blocked Blueblood's next swing in time. He then pushed himself closer, forcing Dash to back up. Gradually, he pushed her back over the bridge, her barely managing to block his blows. Left hoof, right side, head. Dash slashed back, but Blueblood sidestepped it. Dash barely parried the blow. The two made it to the mainland, still trading blows. Then Dash stumbled and fell on her back. Blueblood lunged.

Dash rolled, Blueblood's blade sticking into the ground. She then slashed at him, but he ducked behind his blade. "Nice!" Blueblood said, pulling his blade out of the ground. "Was that out of Hidden Fortress?"

Dash brightened up as she struck back. "Yeah, actually, once. You didn't do too bad dodging it!"

Blueblood shrugged. "Of course, I own that movie."

Rainbow Dash's eyes widened. "Shut up! My dad only owns a copy through a friend! How'd you find it?"

"Prince, remember?"

The fight continued. Left side, right leg, lunge. "I always preferred Burning of Two Rivers, myself," Dash said. "The fight scenes are more acrobatic."

"Acrobatic, hmm?" Blueblood said. "Like this?"

Blueblood somersaulted over Rainbow Dash's head. Dash tried to score a point, but Blueblood always kept the blade between himself and her. As soon as he landed, he whipped around, bringing the blade around in an arc Rainbow Dash had to duck. "Whoa!" Rainbow Dash said. "How did you learn to do that?"

Blueblood shrugged as he parried a blow. "Practice."

"Yes, I imagine you get a lot of that."

Blueblood's smirk momentarily turned into a frown as a yellow unicorn mare walked up behind him. "Hello, Kelliset," Blueblood said, continuing to fight.

Kelliset smirked. "Hello, Blueblood," she said with a chuckle. "I see you're still in that lame-duck assignment. You'd think they'd give you something after three weeks."

"I have plenty to do," Blueblood assured her. "You just can't see it."

"Of course, of course," Kelliset continued. "Planning to recreate your parents' great disaster? Not off to a good start, if the Gala's any indication."

Blueblood's smile completely vanished. "Original," he said. "You're only the thirteenth pony to make that joke today."

Rainbow Dash's eyebrows rose as she dodged a sword swipe. "What're you talking about?" she asked.

Kelliset stared at her. "You don't know?" She snorted. "Well, a few years ago-"

"Don't you have somepony else to bother?" Blueblood snapped.

Kelliset hmphed. "Oh, very well. I suppose I can do that. Ta." Kelliset turned to leave. "Oh, Rainbow Dash, was it?" She smiled. "I'd suggest you ask about Grandmaster and Lethal Weapon before you go joining him on anything."

"Leave," Blueblood commanded.

Kellicent made a small bow, then teleported away. Rainbow Dash blocked a blow, the force ringing down her foreleg. "Who was that?" she asked.

"Old irritant," Blueblood snarled. "Been trying to remove me, but can't."

"OK." Rainbow Dash slashed at Blueblood, but he parried it. The force caught her off-balance, but she recovered. "Why do those ponies hate you so much?" she asked. "Did you flush firecrackers down the House's toilets or something?"

"They're snobs like that," Blueblood told her. "They don't need a reason."

"But who're Grandmaster and Lethal Weapo-"

"I. Don't. Want. To. Talk. About. It. Now. Leave. It. ALONE!"

Dash backed up. "OK, OK. No more quest-"

Rainbow Dash stopped. "Your parents tried to take over Equestria!"

Blueblood turned impossibly whiter. "SHUT UP!"

Rainbow Dash started talking to herself. "And Princess Celestia made you a pri-AHH!"

In the space of a breath, Blueblood had rocketed forward. Rainbow Dash tried to dodge, but Blueblood had hacked her in the wing. There was a loud SMACK and Rainbow Dash fell onto all four hooves. After several moments of hard breathing, Blueblood's eyes widened. He dropped the rapier, and fell onto his hooves. "I'm so-"

POW!

As soon as Blueblood got in range, Rainbow Dash cracked him in the jaw. When his sight returned, he was on the ground and a furious Rainbow Dash was right in his face. "What the hay was that for?" she snapped at him.

Blueblood tried to move, but Dash had him pinned. "I'm sorry," he said. "I didn't mean to hurt you."

"Hurt me?" Dash asked him. "You could've broken my wing!"

"It isn't, is it?" he asked.

Rainbow Dash looked at it. "I don't know. Doesn't feel like it." She got off of Blueblood and lifted off. Immediately, she winced and landed. "Well, it's not broken," she said, glaring at Blueblood. "But it'll take a while before I can use it."

A large bell started tolling the hour. Rainbow Dash looked up at the clock, then her eyes shrank to pinheads. "Oh, no," she whispered. "Ohno ohno ohno ohno ohno! The train's leaving in two minutes and there's no way I can make it there in time! And the mayor gave me my last warning!" She fell to her knees. "I'M GONNA LOSE MY JOOOOOOOB!"

Immediately, Rainbow Dash curled up into a ball and started muttering to herself. Blueblood just stared at her for several seconds. Then, however, his face set, and he walked over to her.

"Is your dress on the train?"

Rainbow Dash looked up at him, then scowled. "What's it to ya'?"

"Is it or isn't it?"

Rainbow Dash kept scowling. "Yeah, it is."

"When does your train leave?"

"In two minutes. Look, if you're-"

"I need a hair from your mane."

Rainbow Dash's head tilted. "I can teleport you to your train," Blueblood explained. "However, due to the distance, I need a piece of your mane. With it, I can lock onto your dress, and thus also the train."

Rainbow Dash glared at him. "I'm sorry," Blueblood repeated. "Please, let me make things right."

Rainbow Dash looked back up at the clock. The minute hand had moved once already. Reluctantly, she put her head forward. "Do it."

Blueblood reached forward and plucked one of the hairs from her mane. "Hold on," he said. "This is going to take it out of me." There was a flash of light.

<<*>>

The first thing Blueblood noticed was that Rainbow Dash was holding him. Then he noticed a heavy wind. Then he saw trees rushing by and a full view of a clear blue sky.

"WHOA!"

Rainbow Dash squeezed him. "HOLD STILL!" she shouted. "WE LANDED ON THE TRAIN, BUT IT LEFT TOO EARLY! I THINK THE CONDUCTOR'S WATCH IS OFF!"

"REALLY?" Blueblood asked. "I COULDN'T TELL!"

"YOU'RE LUCKY I CAUGHT YA'. DON'T SUPPOSE YOU COULD TAKE US THE REST OF THE WAY?"

Blueblood focused his magic. He tried to block out the rushing wind from the train, the swaying it made, and the piercing migraine in his skull. He tried to hold focus for he couldn't guess how long.

"I CAN'T!" he shouted. "NOT ENOUGH MAGIC!"

"TRY MAGNETIZING US! AND DO IT FAST!"

"WHY?"

"LOW TUNNEL COMING UP!"

Blueblood focused his magic again, trying to build the spell in his mind, but there was nothing. Blueblood tried to think of options. He couldn't teleport, he couldn't magnetize, magic was low.

"HOLD ON!" he shouted.

"I HAVE A CHOICE?" Rainbow Dash shouted back.

Blueblood collected power in his horn. When a moderate amount of it had built up, he let it out. A burst of sound and light shot from his horn in all directions. Rainbow Dash almost dropped him, but recovered her grip. He charged another burst and let it go. Then another. And another.

"TWO MILES!" Rainbow Dash shouted.

Blueblood forced power into his horn, firing more quickly. Eventually, however, the bursts began to get smaller and further apart. Blueblood tried to force more to come, but nothing happened.

"ONE MILE!"

Blueblood pulled like he had never pulled in his life. Every drop of magic in his body came into his horn. His body started to go numb, and Blueblood was sure he could feel something dripping onto his chest.

"BLUEBLOOOOOOD!"

There was one last flash of light, and no more.

<<*>>

Blueblood could make out six blobs of color around him. As time passed, he noticed that they were all frowning at him. Their images became clearer, facial features came into focus. Finally, he felt clear-headed enough to talk. "Is Rainbow Dash alright?" he asked.

"Yeah," he heard her say. "Twilight got us."

"She told us an interesting story," the purple mare said. "Something about a sword fight?"

Blueblood tried to get up but Twilight forced him to lay down. "That's my fault," Blueblood said. "I'll tell the mayor anything. Just make sure Rainbow Dash keeps her job."

"Don't worry," the orange one told him. "She's the manager. As long as she's at work on time, she'll be fine. But mighty nice o' yeh t' be concerned."

By now, Blueblood's eyesight had completely focused. He was on the train now, lying on a row of seats and surrounded by the Element-bearers. He felt under his nostrils and noticed a napkin wedged there. "You had a nosebleed," Fluttershy said. "That'll close up in time."

Blueblood turned to face her. "Thanks."

Fluttershy blushed, then cleared her throat. "Well, we'd best give him room to recover, girls."

Blueblood turned again. "Rainbow Dash, can I talk to you for a moment?"

Rainbow Dash remained put as the others filed out of the compartment. "I owe you an explanation," Blueblood said. "About the whole-"

"That's OK," Dash said. "I guessed it was a touchy subject. You just lay back and rest; you can tell me later."

So he did.

Author's Note

Phoo, this took a while. But I did it! I passed my End of Program Exams, I finished this chapter. Some of you have even got a sneak peek before it was quite finished (thanks to Shigawan for the review). But I'm almost done with college, and with that, these chapters should come out just a little bit faster. Not too fast, though, due to my full-time job. I'll do what I can, though. I had no idea how I was going to make more of this pairing, but I found a way. I always do. So, next time, Applejack.

Blueblood the Flare - Rainbow Dash II

“Blueblood? Blueblood?”

Blueblood jerked awake. Twilight was frowning at him. With a yawn, Blueblood stretched and sat up in his seat. “Are we at Ponyville yet?” he asked.

“Almost. There’s just enough time for me to ask about what happened earlier. With Rainbow Dash and the sword.”

Blueblood’s face sank. “I’m sorry,” he said. “All I can say is that my coronation stirred up some old wounds and I’m still a bit sensitive.”

“Rainbow Dash mentioned that,” Twilight told him. “And I know that you’re still sensitive about your parents. But I’m still concerned about what’s going to happen now.”

Blueblood looked out the window. “I think I’ve adjusted.”

“Which explains Rainbow Dash’s wing.”

Blueblood whipped around, mouth open. Then he stopped and shut it again. “In any case, I’m taking a vacation.”

Twilight’s frown lessened. “That sounds like a plan. Where’d you have in mind?”

<<***>>

Rainbow Dash paced up and down the train car. The train had just entered the Ponyville city limits. Dash looked over at Pinkie Pie, who was holding a large, wooden cuckoo clock. Despite the train’s early start, the sudden arrival of two passengers had caused the train to stop for several minutes while the conductor tried to figure out what was going on. Combined with her sudden lack of fly-ability, that meant that Rainbow Dash was dangerously at risk of being caught late for her job.

Finally, the train started to slow down. Rainbow Dash bolted for the door. As the train pulled into the station, Rainbow Dash flicked the sweat from her brow. Finally, the train stopped. The doors opened and Rainbow dashed out onto the platform. She spun around and sped down the stairs.

“Rainbow Dash?”

Rainbow Dash skidded to a halt. Mayor Mare was in the road glaring at her. “Uhh…” Rainbow Dash straightened up with a nervous grin plastered over her face. “Hi, there, ma’am! Fancy seeing you here! What’cha doin’?”

The mayor’s frown deepened. “I’m going to lunch. You are supposed to be at work by now.”

“Train was late, ma’am! I’m headed to the office right now! See ya’ later!” Rainbow Dash turned and ran down the road.

“Hold on!”

Rainbow Dash stopped and let Mayor Mare walk up to her. “You’re not flying,” Mayor Mare noted. “Am I right in guessing that’s because of something you did at the Gala?”

“Uhh, no! I just-“

“That was my fault.”

The two mares looked back at the train station. Blueblood was walking down the steps, smiling despite the bloody tissue in his nostrils. “I invited her to fence with me and I got a bit carried away. No serious injuries, just a bad bruise, and she knocked some sense into me. Not like this,” he pointed to his nose. “But she did set me straight. You know what it’s like in the zone, don’t you, Wild Mare?”

Mayor Mare stared at Blueblood for a moment. Then she smiled. “Well, they didn’t call you ‘Black-and-Blueblood’ for nothing.” She laughed. “Remember that game against Amora Prep?”

Blueblood chuckled. “Of course. It’s hard to forget knocking somepony backwards with a dodgeball.”

Rainbow Dash started. “Wait, what?”

“He was fine,” Blueblood told her, “though he was pretty shocked. And I did start that whole thing.”

“No, you just gave as good as you got,” Mayor Mare said. “Blueblood, it’s great to see you again! It’s been too long. What’s been going on in your life?”

“Way too much for me to describe here,” Blueblood said. “Thankfully, I’m on vacation right now.”

Mayor Mare beamed. “Fantastic! Come and join me for lunch!”

Blueblood bowed. “I’d be delighted to.”

Mayor Mare and Blueblood walked off. Rainbow Dash just stared after them.

“Don’t you have work to do, Rainbow Dash?”

Dash leapt in the air, then sped down the street.

<<***>>

As soon as Rainbow Dash entered her office at City Hall, she pulled out a box of forms and wrote. Occasionally she’d talk to one of her subordinates, but the prevalent sound in her office was the scratching of a quill. This continued well past closing time, as Rainbow Dash filled out weather reports, cloud order forms, and signed off on anything that looked even remotely close to being overdue. Finally, after twenty minutes on a cot, Rainbow Dash placed a set of forms in a folder and walked out to the mayor’s office.

As soon as she got to the hall it was in, Rainbow Dash heard voices. Slowly, she got closer. She could hear laughter, rolling-on-the-floor laughter. That never happened in that office. Finally, Rainbow Dash knocked on the door.

“Come in!”

Rainbow Dash did so. Mayor Mare was behind her desk, positively beaming. Sitting in front of the desk was a gold earth stallion with a scalpel cutie mark. Rainbow Dash couldn’t place him. Sitting next to him, however, was Blueblood, still shaking in his chair. “Ah, Rainbow Dash,” Mayor Mare said. “What did you need?”

Rainbow Dash walked in. “I’ve got those reports you wanted,” she said, dropping the folder into her box. “What’s going on?”

“Oh, just catching up with a friend,” Mayor Mare said. “Blueblood you know. I don’t know if you remember him, but this is Surgical Precision.”

Precision stood up and offered his hoof. “I’m Ponyville’s representative in the Assembly.”

“Oh. Yeah.” Dash shook his hoof after a brief pause. “Pleased to meet you.”

Precision ignored the lack of enthusiasm and turned to Blueblood. “So how long’d it take to unclog everything?”

“That’s the best part,” Blueblood said. “There was no clog. My cohorts and I set up a series of plug charms and timed them to fade away after a few days. We even set up janitorial spells to keep the floors clean.”

“That was nice of you,” Precision noted.

“So, you guys know each other?” Rainbow Dash asked.

“Oh, yes,” Mayor Mare said. “We actually served on the dodgeball team together in high school.”

“I just met him a few months ago, when he was still just occasional Viceroy,” Precision said. “The House of Lords sent me all over Congress. I was tired and embarrassed, and Blueblood just helped me set myself up. He even got revenge for me.”

“Not revenge,” Blueblood said. “I just made it clear to them that their actions have consequences.”

“Ah, I’d probably better get to work,” Mayor Mare said, looking at the clock on her wall. “Well, Blueblood, I hope I can see more of you in the next two weeks.”

Blueblood smiled. “Count on it.”

“So,” Rainbow Dash said, “is there-“

“Oh, no, Rainbow Dash,” Mayor Mare said, “you’re all caught up. Just go ahead and enjoy your day off.”

“OK, thanks.”

Dash, Blueblood, and Precision left the room. “Did you sleep well last night?” Blueblood asked Rainbow Dash.

Rainbow Dash yawned. “Huh? Oh, nah. I pulled an all-nighter. Again. I really can’t wait to get home and go to bed.”

“Oh.” Blueblood seemed a little disappointed.

Rainbow Dash looked at him. “What’s up?”

“Oh, it’s nothing. I was just wondering if you wanted to have breakfast with me. Tell me about the town, things like that.”

Rainbow Dash smiled. “Sure, I’ve got enough juice for that.”

<<***>>

“This is actually very nice.”

Rainbow Dash looked up at Blueblood from her poached egg. “Well, yeah,” she said. “I wouldn’t show you a place that stunk.”

Blueblood put his hoof up. “I didn’t mean to come off as snobby,” he said. “It’s just that I’m used to fine dining and this… I’ll be quiet.” Blueblood took a bite of his Prench toast. “I see you’re an egg-eater.”

“Yep,” Dash said. “An old friend introduced me to them. A griffon.”

Blueblood hmmed. “Your friend has good taste.”

Rainbow Dash frowned. “Yeah, she did once.”

Blueblood looked at her, but Dash didn’t elaborate. “So,” Blueblood said, “how’s your wing doing?”

Rainbow Dash perked up a little. “Oh, it’s fine. Just needed a little time to recover.”

Blueblood nodded. “Good.”

The two kept eating. After a few seconds, though, Rainbow Dash felt the silence become awkward. She looked up and noticed Blueblood’s mouth opening and closing. “Something on your mind?” she asked.

Blueblood frowned. “Well, I said I owe you an explanation-“

“If you don’t want to, it’s OK.”

“Well, I still-“

Rainbow Dash put her hoof in Blueblood’s. “Hey. You don’t owe me anything. You made sure I was alright. You got me to work on time. You’re even buying me break…”

Rainbow Dash looked down. Then she took her hoof off of Blueblood’s. “It’s OK,” she said.

“I just don’t want you to think I’m the type of pony that does this all the time.”

“I believe ya’,” Dash said. “Twilight believes you; that’s good enough for me. Frankly, I’m more curious about why you’re not an alicorn if you’re a pri… wait, is that a sensitive question?”

Blueblood was frowning a little. “Not really. It’s just a little irritating, and I’ve mostly gotten over that. It all started several weeks ago…”

<<***>>

Celestia looked up from her desk as the door opened. “I thought you’d want some support,” Blueblood said.

Celestia nodded. “That’d be wonderful. Thank you.”

Blueblood walked over to his usual seat: a simple chair at the side of the desk. He magically poured himself a glass of ice water. “How many times does this make?” Blueblood asked.

Celestia shrugged. “I haven’t been counting, but I probably could.” She sat back and groaned. “Sometimes, it seems like I have to deal with the same things every generation. I wouldn’t mind doing it so much if I-”

The door opened again. In came the three Speakers of each chamber of Congress: a brown earth stallion from the Assembly, a pink pegasus mare from the Senate, and a yellow unicorn mare from the House of Lords with blue eyes and an unpleasant smirk. When they had entered the study, they bowed to Celestia. “Your highness,” Kelliset said, “have you considered our proposal?”

Celestia lifted the papers on her desk with her magic. “I have, and I wanted to address my chief grievance with it before I vetoed it.”

Kelliset’s smirk remained undimmed, and the Speakers sat in the three chairs on the other side of the desk from Celestia. “I haven’t seen you in a while,” Blueblood said. “Did you enjoy my valentine for you?”

“The guard he came with actually let me keep him,” Kelliset said easily. “That skunk was a perfect gentlecolt.” She turned back to Celestia. “You had grievances with the bill?”

“Just the one,” Celestia continued. “Most of these clauses are sound. In fact, most of them, such as farmer’s aid and increased funding for Yakyakistan border guards, are things that the Assembly and the Senate have wanted for some time. That is, I imagine, why my biggest problem with this bill was approved.” Celestia turned to a certain page. On it was a set of paragraphs that had been circled in red ink. “I understand you want to create another princess,” Celestia said. “Would you care to explain why?”

Kelliset spoke. “Your highness, there is no denying your heart is in the right place,” she said, “but after recent events, including the Changeling Invasion and the return of Nightmare Moon, many of the members of Congress are concerned about your position as sole monarch.”

“Yes, I imagine the House is concerned about that,” Blueblood said, taking a sip of water.

Kelliset smiled sweetly at Blueblood. “You are mistaken, your grace,” she said. “There’s been support for this measure throughout all three chambers for months now. She turned back to Celestia. “They are not demanding your abdication, your highness. They only want assurance that, should something happen to you, the people will be protected. Even though you claim that there are others to stop you, these are alicorns who are under your influence, either through blood or through your tutelage. All we ask is our own voice.”

Celestia nodded. “I know they are, and that’s quite a reasonable request.”

“Except for the one making it,” Blueblood grumbled.

“Your highness,” Kelliset continued, “you can see that I don’t benefit from this measure. It says here in section XII, paragraph 2, that this princess is to be elected by two-thirds of Congress and approved by you. Paragraph five states that she can be removed from office by two-thirds vote.”

“After three months,” Blueblood pointed out. “That’s plenty of time for corruption and catastrophe, especially caused by somepony who is required to have already served in Congress.”

“My sentiments exactly,” Celestia said. “Therefore, this bill is going to be vetoed until such time as is proper.”

“I would advise you reconsider,” Kelliset said. “We already have the two-thirds vote required to override your veto, so you might as well sign.”

Celestia glared at Kelliset, then over to the other Speakers. “She speaks for both of you?” she asked.

The two ponies nodded, careful to look away from the Princess.

“I see.” Celestia sighed. “Very well.” She drew out a seal and a vial full of hot, golden wax. She poured the wax over the paper, then stamped her seal onto it. “You all have what you wanted, and I order that it be done with all haste.”

Blueblood glared at the three Speakers. “You can go now.”

Kelliset nodded. “Very well.” She moved to get up, but stopped. “Oh, since I’m here…” Kelliset produced from a coat pocket a piece of paper, which she laid on Celestia’s desk. “Here is the list of candidates approved by Congress. As a reminder, you get a whole week to make your decision.”

“That won’t be necessary,” Princess Celestia said, looking up from the paper. “I choose Viceroy Blueblood!”

There was a loud crash as Blueblood dropped his glass. Kelliset’s smile vanished and all of the ponies stared at Celestia. “I’m sorry?” Kelliset said.

Blueblood mopped up the water dripping from his mouth and turned to the three Speakers. “My aunt is very tired,” he said. “If you-“

“No, your aunt is thinking perfectly clearly,” Celestia said. “All of the ponies on this list are repulsive, and I reject them utterly. Therefore, I name a replacement: Blueblood, my Viceroy.” She turned to the other speakers. “He would receive the required two-thirds of support, would he not?”

The Speakers for the Assembly and the Senate instantly nodded. “Absolutely,” said the Speaker of the Senate.

“Your highness,” Kelliset protested, “the Viceroy gives the Hearths Warming Speech! Nothing else!”

“Is he not a member of Congress?” Celestia asked. “That distinction was not made in the bill. Of course, you’re perfectly free to take the matter up with the Supreme Court. Until then, we have nothing more to talk about on the matter.”

Kelliset scowled at Celestia, but bowed. “As you wish,” she snarled. She and the other Speakers rose and left the room.

As soon as the door closed, Blueblood scowled at Celestia. “What did you do that for?” he asked.

Celestia’s face softened. “I need your help,” she said. “I don’t trust this bill and I don’t like the possible reasons it was given to me. Kelliset’s never been anywhere close to supporting something like this before, and I doubt she would change that stance this quickly. I’m conducting an investigation, but I need time. You’re the pony I trust the most with this, and I need you in that spot. It’ll be little different from what you normally do.”

“It’ll be every bit different!” Blueblood snapped. “Before, I was just the court jester! Now I’m a prince! You think this isn’t going to stir things up just a little more for me than what I normally do?”

“I need you,” Celestia repeated. “I’m afraid that something foul is going on.”

Blueblood glared at her for a long time. Celestia looked gently back at him. Finally, Blueblood sighed. “I’ll do it.”

“Thank you.”

<<***>>

“Ah,” Rainbow Dash said. “I should really start reading the actual news more often.”

“You probably wouldn’t see it. They’re covering up their great embarrassing attempt to usurp the Princesses extremely well.” Blueblood frowned into his coffee. “However, those names on the list still didn’t like getting passed up for princehood, and they started riling up high society. In the past, they were nasty, but they let it go after a while. Now, however, they’re utterly relentless.” He put his head in his hooves. “If I’m not in the tabloids for every little thing, I’m getting letters reminding me of what my parents did when I was a teenager. I fought back for a few weeks, but I just got tired of it after a while, and you know how I started to slip up.” He straightened up. “I’m honestly tempted to abdicate.”

Blueblood lay his head down with a sigh and looked out the window. Rainbow Dash frowned. She reached out a hoof, but stopped just shy of touching him and drew it back. Then she smiled.

“You’re a prince, right?”

Blueblood looked up at her. “Yes?” he said.

“And what do princes get to do?”

Blueblood sat up. “You already have their attention,” Rainbow Dash said. “Might as well enjoy it.”

Blueblood looked into her eyes for several moments silently. Then, however, he smirked. “Got any ideas?”

The two ponies got up from the table and walked to the door, a stack of bits on the table. “Give me a day, your highness: I’ll make you proud.”

“Blueblood?”

As the two left, Fluttershy came up to join them, a long, spotted, furry thing wrapped around her neck. Blueblood smiled at her. “Fluttershy!” he said. “Is that a Slithering Civet?”

“Oh, yes!”

Fluttershy put up a hoof and the furry thing slithered onto it. It had a cat-like head, big eyes, and extremely tiny legs. When it saw Blueblood, it meowed at him. Rainbow Dash backed away with an uneasy look on her face, but Blueblood walked closer and let the thing rub against him as he chuckled. “Where’d you find her?” he asked.

“There’s a whole clowder of them in the Everfree Forest,” Fluttershy explained. “Tsarmina here just wandered by my house one day and decided to stick around.” She pulled back a little. “If you want, I can show you the other animals I take care of.”

“Of course,” Blueblood said, “I’d be delighted.” He turned back to Rainbow Dash. “You don’t mind, do you?”

Rainbow Dash took a moment to reply. “No,” she said easily, “go ahead. I’ll get planning.”

“Excellent. I’ll see you later.”

With that, Blueblood and Fluttershy turned off down another road. Rainbow Dash frowned a little bit as Fluttershy moved a little closer. Then Rainbow Dash looked away and shook herself. “What is going on with me?” she asked herself as she walked away.

<<***>>

Kelliset was frowning at an ancient clay jar as her aide entered her office. “What’s the news?” she asked.

“Blueblood’s left Canterlot,” the aide said. “He’s in Ponyville.”

Kelliset frowned at her aide. “That’s not a resignation. Follow him; keep wearing him down. Until you do-”

Then Kelliset started to cough. “Are you alright, sir?” the aide asked.

Kelliset’s coughing eventually stopped. “Yes,” she said, “and please quit calling me ‘sir’.”

The aide nodded. “Sorry. I’ll get right to work.”

The aide left the room. Then Kelliset heard a chirping noise in the corner. Tumbling out of the cat habitat there was a skunk. Kelliset stared at him for a moment, and her eyes glowed green for a moment. But then she grimaced and broke out into a smile. “C’mere you,” she said, eyes back to normal. She levitated a small stuffed animal in front of the skunk. He leapt at it, but Kelliset jerked the toy away. “Almost,” she cooed as the skunk wound up again. “Almost got it, Valentine!”

“The things I do to keep you and your little rat quiet,” she muttered under her voice. "But soon my brothers and I will all be free."

The jar glowed green.

Author's Note

Surprise! You get two chapters of this story this month, and my first sequel! Wait, second. First sequel chapter to one of these chapters. That makes sense, right?

OK, I've got a lot to say, but this is the author's note. Ergo, here is the journal explaining everything: please read.

Blueblood the Ill-Humored - Applejack

Celestia marched the livid little colt into his room. He was still wet from the rain outside and it was long past midnight. She angrily motioned for him to get on his bed and he sat with a huff. “Alright, Blueblood,” she said, “what were you doing sneaking into-“

“You knew. About my parents.”

Celestia’s heart instantly sank. She knew exactly what he was talking about. Blueblood glared at her as she tried to gather her thoughts. Finally, she nodded. “Not at first.”

Blueblood’s jaw dropped. “What? Not at… they lived in this city! They went to your school!”

“Your family was very good at keeping secrets,” Celestia said. “And I didn’t believe any of them would do something so… something like that.”

“WELL THEY DID, DIDN’T THEY?!”

“Blueblood, I’m so sorry,” Celestia pleaded. “I hoped you wouldn’t find out.”

“Well, I did,” Blueblood spat. “It was easy. What if somepony else finds out? Forget me getting the trots at the school play; I’ll never be able to show my face in public again!” He tried to say something else, but he groaned and spun away from the Princess. “Just go away.”

“Blueblood-“

“I SAID-AH!”

Blueblood whipped around, but he fell onto his side. His back arched and his breathing shallowed to near nothingness. A few painful wheezes came out of his mouth, but otherwise, he was silent. Celestia grabbed him with her magic and carried him into the hallway. “It’ll be alright, Blueblood,” she told him as she dashed down the corridor with him. “I’m not going to let you down again.”

<<***>>

Prince Blueblood sat in his office at City Hall, poring over a map of Canterlot. Placed at various points over the map were Monopoly houses painted with various symbols. At the moment, Blueblood was toying with a grey hotel with a crossed wrench and screwdriver on it. Several parts of the map had little green squares fixed to them, and Blueblood kept moving the hotel between them.

‘No,’ he thought to himself, ‘407 West Elm has too much smog already. But 892 Ostler Drive is too far away for the workers to walk. 15 Hampton Crescent is right next to the park. 63 Hurricane Boulevard… has the snobs.’ Blueblood groaned as he arched his back, carefully stretching a cramp out of the tender spot.

Then the clock tower bell rang, and Blueblood looked up at the clock. Surely enough, it was two o'clock. Blueblood carefully rolled the map up and placed it in his desk drawer. Then he pulled out an orange bottle. He opened the bottle, but then noticed that there was nothing inside. He checked the window. ‘The thermometer’s a little low, especially for late September.’ He frowned, but then shrugged. ‘I don’t care. Besides, I have my coat.’ Thus, he got out of his chair. After checking the pocket, he put on his coat, sighing as he felt the warmth sink in. Then he, picked up his saddlebags, walked over to his door with the missing window, and walked out into the hall.

"Hello, Princey."

Blueblood turned around. Standing behind him was a white unicorn mare, tall and alicornesque in form. After a moment, Blueblood smiled. "Fleur-de-Lis! What are you doing here?"

Fleur smiled. "Am I not allowed to get in touch with old friends? What've you been up to? It’s been years."

Blueblood shrugged. "Nothing vastly important. My ancestral lands are pretty well sorted out at the moment so I'm staying in Canterlot to help sort out some municipal issues. I practically run the place."

The conversation stopped as a brown earth stallion marched two fillies, one pink and one silver, down the hallway. "You never tell me anything, Daddy," the pink one groused.

Blueblood and Fleur stared after them. "That reminds me, I really must push the staff to fix that hole in Genealogy's vent," Blueblood said.

Fleur looked back at Blueblood. "That's still there?"

Blueblood nodded. "Canterlot Town Hall is nothing if not inefficient. I've been waiting ages for my new window. Someone tried to break in."

Several bells began to sound. "Ah, that would be the downstairs clock," Blueblood said. "It's always a few minutes off." He turned back to Fleur. "If you'll excuse me, I was just going to go out to lunch."

"Fancy Pants and I were about to visit the new restaurant in the High Street," Fleur offered. "We wouldn't mind seeing you again."

"I'm sorry, I already have plans. Are you free on Saturday?"

Fleur nodded. "Yes."

Blueblood smiled. "Excellent. Well, I'll see you DAH!"

Blueblood jumped away as the workerpony pulled his trolley back. "Sorry, I-"

He shut up as soon as he saw Blueblood, and the color ran out of him as he saw Blueblood scowling. "I should hope so!" Blueblood snapped, moving towards the worker. "This coat is warmed with a special spell that automatically senses exactly where heat is needed. It's very fragile, very hard to cast, and worth more than your entire family!"

The worker tried to back away, but bumped into a wall. "I’m s-"

"Oh, don't worry," Blueblood said as he towered over the worker, horn alight. "If anything had happened to it, I would've found some way for you to repay me."

Blueblood stood there for several seconds before he snorted in the worker's face and stormed down the hall. Fleur stared after him as he rounded the corner. Then she recovered herself and turned to the worker. "Are you alright, Mister..."

The worker stared at her. "Uh, T-t-trundle, ma'am," he stuttered.

"Is he normally like that?" Fleur asked.

Trundle paused for a moment before answering. "Well... he's not quite so snappy, but yes, he is generally like that. I heard he even sued a newspaper into bankruptcy for nosing into his personal life."

"I'm sorry," Fleur told him sadly. "I don't remember him being like this. But that was back when we were children."

Trundle stared at her. Before Fleur could say anything, though, he nodded. "Yea-yes, that kind of time changes ponies. I've known him for almost a year and sometimes it takes the thought of the bank to get me to deliver anything to him."

Fleur's eyebrow rose. "The bank?"

Trundle raised his hoof. "It's nothing, ma'am. Have a nice day."

Fleur nodded. "You do the-" She stared over Trundle's shoulder. "Who's that?"

Trundle turned around. "Who's who?"

"You just missed him," Fleur said. "Brown earth stallion, mane slicked back, had two little fillies with him?"

"Yeah, I saw him just a moment ago. Never seen him before, though."

Fleur shrugged. "Ah, that's alright. Have a nice day."

Fleur walked down the hall, Trundle staring sadly after her for a moment. But then he turned and walked away, unaware of the second pile of bits in the bottom of his cart.

<*>

The train stopped. As soon as the doors opened, an orange mare in a Stetson stepped out and walked to the back of the train, casting an eye around her. She was happy to see that her cart had already been unloaded and quickly checked on the merchandise in the bottom. All intact. She lifted a few of the items onto the shelves on the cart and went to hitch up.

"APPLEJACK!"

Applejack whipped around. Pounding down the platform were three fillies: the Cutie Mark Crusaders. "What're you three doing here?" Applejack asked, a frown growing on her face. "You're supposed to be in school."

The three skidded to a halt. "Applejack," Apple Bloom pleaded, "we're so sorry! We won't go crusadin' anymore!"

"We'll get jobs!" Sweetie Belle begged. "I'll even beg Rarity for money, just please don't do this!"

"You'll hate yourself for the rest of your life!" Scootaloo cried. "You don't have to do it!"

Applejack's eyebrows rose. "O-K? Care to explain what Ah don't have t' do?"

The three stared at each other before turning back to Applejack. "We don't really know," Scootaloo said, "but we know whatever ponies do for extra money is really bad!"

Apple Bloom put her hooves on Applejack's shoulders. "Look, if Sweet Apple Acres is in trouble because o' us, we'll pay for it. You shouldn't have to."

Applejack pushed Apple Bloom off of her. "Look, Ah appreciate the concern, really, but Sweet Apple Acres idn't in any trouble." Applejack laughed. "Where'd ya' even get such a crazy idea? We're doin' great, better'n we have in years! We're just... ye'r not buyin' this, are ya'?"

The three shook their heads. "Nope," Sweetie Belle said. "We saw the crop report."

Applejack sighed. "OK, yeah, we're not doin' so well right now." She held a hoof up. "But it was nuthin' you did, though Ah really am touched that yer willin' t' make up for it. We just had a really bad crop; it happens. An' don' go blamin' Fluttershy none neither; it wadn't the vampire bats 'at caused it. As fer what Ah'm doin', Ah'm just takin' some o' these," she pointed to the cart, "an' Ah'm gonna' try sellin' 'em in Canterlot fer more money. If that don't work, then Ah'll ask for a loan, Pinkie Promise. Just let me try and solve this mah way first, OK?"

The three shared another glance at each other before they looked back up at Applejack and nodded. "OK," Apple Bloom said.

"Good." Applejack motioned to the train. "Now git back t' class."

Once the three foals had boarded the train and the train had rolled out of the station, Applejack hitched up and pulled the cart out onto the road.

Several blocks later, a couple walked by and Applejack noticed them looking at her cart. "Alright, Applejack," she told herself as she walked down the street. "Yew can do this. Just remember when you were in Manehattan."

She smiled. "Good morning," she said to the two ponies. "May I interest you in some-"

"Filthy hayseed."

"Indeed."

The two passed. Applejack stared after them. "OK, this could be harder than Ah thought," she said to herself.

"You, back up!"

Applejack turned her head around to notice a violet earth stallion pushing at her. "Why?" she asked.

"Just hurry up and back up!"

Applejack did so, backing up until the stallion dove out of the way. "OK," Applejack asked him, "what the hay's going on?"

The stallion was sweaty and panting. "You're blocking City Hall!"

Applejack turned. Sure enough, there was a side door to City Hall. "Only for a moment," Applejack said. "Ah was just passin' by."

"You would've been in front of him!"

"Who's him?"

The stallion stared at her. "Him! You'll see him in just a moment!"

Applejack waited for a few moments, but nothing happened. "OK," she said, "where?"

The stallion pointed up at the door. "There!"

"When?"

"Now!"

The door opened. Out came a white unicorn in a black coat and saddlebags. He had blond hair and blue eyes and smirked at the street before he strutted out into it, turning the same way Applejack was going. "That's him," the violet stallion said. "Prince Blueblood!"

Applejack frowned. "Yeah, we've met."

Before the violet stallion could say another word, Applejack pressed off down the street. She kept her distance from Blueblood, but she also kept pace with him. As the two kept moving down the street, the ponies around them stopped what they were doing and backed away from Blueblood. Regardless, Applejack kept moving. Eventually, Blueblood noticed a mare in her garden and walked over to her.

As soon as she saw him, the mare backed away. "Your highness! Is there anything I can..."

Blueblood took a bite out of one of her flowers. He immediately made a face and spat it out. "That is an invasive species," he sneered. "Burn it."

Applejack frowned at him, but took the opportunity to pass him. Once he was out of her sight, Applejack quickly began to feel better. But then a golden glow surrounded her, holding her in place. "HEY!" she shouted, "WHAT-"

Applejack stopped to shudder as Blueblood literally walked through her. "You were blocking my view," he said.

Applejack growled, but forced back her desire to kill the prince and kept walking.

Soon the two came across the decayed ruins of a burnt-out house. Standing out front of it was a pony conducting an interview while another pony fiddled with a camera. "OK," the photographer said. "Keep clear!"

The reporter looked up and paled. "Snapshot, wai-"

POOM!

The flashbulb went off just as Blueblood walked into shot. Snapshot's jaw dropped, but before he could say anything, a cloud of gold magic ripped the plate out of the camera and flung it onto a roof. "You caught my bad side," Blueblood said.

All Snapshot did was stare after Blueblood. The reporter walked over and put his hoof around his shoulder. "It's OK, Snaps," he said. "At least you weren't writing about him."

The two looked sadly over at the ramshackle ruins Snaps was photographing. Inside was a pony huddled under a blanket. Applejack's ears started to steam, and she started stomping behind Blueblood, teeth grinding together as she wished all sorts of foul occurrences upon him.

At that moment, a torrent of icy water splashed Blueblood all over. He leapt with a scream, then looked up. A unicorn colt was standing on the roof blowing a raspberry at him. Blueblood snarled at him. "YOU LITTLE BRAT!" he shouted as Applejack's frown became slightly less prominent. "COME DOWN HERE BEFORE-"

As the colt wiggled his flank at Blueblood, he slipped. Then he slid off the roof with a scream. Applejack's heart stopped for a moment. She swung her hooves up to release herself from the cart. Then, however, Blueblood grabbed the foal with his magic, gently lowering him down to the ground. Blueblood walked up to the colt. The colt sat, face blank, only focusing on Blueblood when he was right in front of him.

"Are you alright?" Blueblood asked him gently.

The colt didn't speak but managed to nod.

"Are you going to go up on that roof again?"

The colt shook his head.

"Good boy." Blueblood paused for a moment. "Here." Blueblood levitated a large bit out of his saddlebags and placed it on Applejack's cart. Then he pulled a big tart off of the cart and levitated it to the foal. "Are your parents in there?" The colt nodded. "Very well. You take this, go inside, and lie down for a while. Can you do that?"

The foal looked up at Blueblood for a moment, then gently took the tart with his magic, turned, and entered the house. As soon as the colt was in the house, Blueblood turned away and walked down the street. He stopped for a moment, shifting around in his coat, but then continued to move, popping a small pill into his mouth. Applejack just stared at him. 'He did that?' She straightened up and started pulling the cart again. 'I guess I underestimated him.' Applejack unhitched herself and walked around to the shelf where Blueblood had set the coin.

Five bits. For an eight-bit tart. Applejack sighed. 'Well, at least it went to a good cause,' she thought as she put the bit in the coin box. She hitched back up to the cart and continued walking. Blueblood's gait had changed to something stiffer and quicker, but Applejack paid that little mind.

Applejack's heart sank as she noticed that he was entering the Canterlot Park. When he entered, however, he immediately turned off the stone path. Applejack breathed a sigh of relief and continued on her way. Almost immediately inside the park was a circle around a fountain, loaded with ponies wandering around. Here Applejack unhitched the cart and unfolded the display table. Then out came the rest of her merchandise all across the table. Finally, Applejack got behind the cart, ignoring the cold spray of water from the fountain, and smiled.

"APPLES!" she called out. "BAKED TREATS AT'RE SWEET T'EAT! APPLE TART, EIGHT BITS! APPLE CUPCAKE FER FIVE! WARM AND DELICIOUS! MADE FRESH AT SWEET APPLE ACRES!"

A unicorn couple, mare and stallion, took notice and started to walk over. Applejack beamed. "Good day t' ya," Applejack said. "What can Ah get ya'?"

The stallion looked over the table, taking a deep sniff. Then he looked at Applejack. "How much for- what is i..."

The mare poked him on the shoulder and pointed behind him. As soon as he saw what it was, he paled. Applejack turned around. Behind the fountain was a small hill, on top of which was a bench under a tree, and on that bench was Blueblood, just then looking up from a book.

<*>

Blueblood sat reading his book. His coat had been damaged by the water, but the tree shielded him from the breeze. Unfortunately, there was another cramp was coming, and his aspirin had just started digesting. Thus, Blueblood laid on the bench and read.

“APPLES!”

Blueblood looked up. The pony with the cart was below him hawking her wares. He suppressed a wince as he heard the prices. ‘I’ll have to slip her her the difference,” he thought. ‘Later, when those two have-‘

The mare looked up at him, then poked her partner, who stared up at him as well. Blueblood scowled as the food pony turned around. ‘Excellent,’ he thought sarcastically. ‘I wanted to be the bad guy today.’

“Problem?” the food pony called out.

"Yes, I suppose there is."

"Care t' come over an' tell me what it is?"

"I'm nobility, you come to me."

"Well Ah'm the Element o' Honesty. You can come to me."

Several ponies stopped what they were doing to stare at the two. Blueblood glared at the pony, but she didn’t give an inch. ‘She’s not moving,’ he nervously thought to himself. ‘Alright, Blueblood, be rational. She knows your aunt, so she’s not going to bow to you. There are five, six, eight… too many ponies coming for you to ignore.’ Blueblood’s scowl deepened. ‘Celestia, forgive me, but I’m going to have to play dirty.’

Slowly, Blueblood got up, minding the cramp. Everyone but Applejack quickly backed away. Blueblood stepped over to Applejack's cart, slowly and delicately, glaring into her eyes the whole time. Finally, he stopped just out of hoof's reach of her, deliberately turning his nose up at her.

"You said you had a problem, yer highness?" the orange pony prompted.

Blueblood sniffed at her. "Your cart is in the wrong place, whoever-you-are," he said.

"Mah name’s Applejack," she said, "an’ mah cart's in th' right place. I got the permit from city hall an' everythin'."

Blueblood smirked at her. "Oh really? Do you have it wi-"

Applejack pointed to the wagon. There on the side was the permit. Blueblood walked towards it, but Applejack stepped in front of him. "Fergive me if Ah don't let you get closer,” she said, slapping his horn, “Ah'd rather not have t' track down yer aunt an' tell her what a pain ye'r bein' today."

Blueblood glared at the permit, then back at Applejack. After a few seconds Applejack whiffed at him, then turned back to the crowd. ‘Think!’ Blueblood exhorted himself. ‘Think think thi- wait a minute, that name was on the news!’

"APPLES!" she shouted. "BAKED APPLE TREATS! GUARANTEED FRESH BY TH' ELEMENT O' HONESTY!"

"FREE FLIM-FLAM HEALTH TONIC WITH EVERY PURCHASE!"

Applejack whipped around with a growl. "GO AWAY!" she shouted.

Blueblood smirked at her, heart hammering. "What? You are the Element of Honesty, I assumed you'd want to be honest with your customers."

"Honestly speaking," Applejack snarled, "Ah'm no longer affiliated with those two shucksters an' Ah'm gettin' ready t' tan yer hide if ya' don't clear out b'fore Ah count ta' five!"

Blueblood tutted at her. “That would be assault on a member of nobility, and I can assure you from personal experience that Aunt Celestia does not issue pardons to loved-”

Blueblood paused. The cramp in his back had started to tighten. Applejack wasn’t moving, instead, she was just counting up, stomping with each number. In feverish desperation, inspiration struck him. ‘Celestia, please forgive me…’

“Oh, what was I thinking?” he said in his most condescending tone. “I don’t expect somepony like you to know that. Poor little hayseed, you can’t even count to five without using your hooves.”

Applejack flushed. “Ah can do anything you say,” she growled.

“Very well then.” Blueblood stepped back, lighting up his horn. A ball of golden light shot out from it, soaring over the heads of the crowd. Blueblood took advantage of the moment to slip a small bag of bits out of his saddlebags and onto the cart. After a few seconds buzzing around (dive bombing Applejack several times), it burst open, revealing a message.

847 * 65 = ?

Applejack stared at him. “You can’t expect me t’ solve that!”

Blueblood snorted. “Please, I can do that easily. 55,055.”

A pony looked up from numbers etched in the dirt. “He’s right.”

“Still,” he continued, “I am a city pony. I suppose I can go easy on you.”

The pattern rearranged itself with much sparking. 8 * 4 = ? Applejack glared at him. “What’s the matter?” Blueblood asked. “Is it too hard?”

“No,” Applejack growled.

“Then tell me what eight times four is.” Blueblood said. “Unless your parents were too busy chasing flying saucers to te-”

“EIGHTY-FOUR!”

Blueblood leapt back in alarm as the mare leapt at him. Applejack had gone white, blowing smoke from her nostrils, loudly grinding her teeth into powder. All thought of the cramp had left his mind, replaced by fear. Then Applejack closed her eyes. “Forty-seven! Eight-thirty-two!”

Applejack turned to face her cart with a heavy groan. Blueblood stared at her. ‘What happened?’ he asked himself. ‘I didn’t mean to do that.’ Blueblood walked over to her. “Are you-“

Applejack whipped around, moving nose-to-nose with him. “If you are not out of this park in ten seconds,” she annunciated, “I will snap you in two. Got it?”

Blueblood nodded and trotted towards the tree.

“An’ take this wit’cha!”

Blueblood barely comprehended what she was talking about before the bag hit him. Pain exploded all over his back, and he fell to his knees with a scream.

“Oh, get up! It ain’t that heavy!”

Blueblood struggled through his sudden tears to get to his hooves. As soon as he was able, he started to walk back to his bench, rigidly shifting a whole leg at a time. Then it was as if something had wrapped an iron cable all around his body and tightened it. Blueblood collapsed again, his lungs too constricted to expand more than a puff of air. Dignity had left him; all he could think about was the agony in his back.

<*>

Applejack glared at the prince as the ponies around her started to talk. ‘He’s fine,’ she thought. ‘Jus’ give him a minute an’ he’ll pick himself up.’

Blueblood stiffly pulled his legs around and tried pulling himself across the ground. He only moved slowly, though, putting a lot of dirt on his coat. ‘Wow,’ Applejack mused, ‘he’s really dedicated to this.’

Blueblood then came to the footpath boundary, a line of bricks jutting out of the ground. He tried to raise himself up, but his legs gave out too quickly. Thus, he turned himself, pushing with his hindleg until he was parallel to the bricks. Then he shoved off, rolling over the bricks with a loud, quickly aborted scream. Applejack saw tears streaming down his cheeks.

‘…maybe Ah should check on him.’ Applejack walked over to him. “Can Ah help you?”

Blueblood just kept moving forward, towards the tree. After a moment of deliberation, Applejack ran over and grabbed his saddlebags. For some reason, the strap was hot and she almost instantly dropped them on the ground. She pushed them instead, leaving them right in front of the prince. “What do ya’ need, sir?” she asked gently.

Blueblood crawled towards the opening of the belt and tried to squirm his way under it. He couldn’t even lift them. His horn lit up, but it flickered and could not lift the bags. Then Applejack understood. She grabbed one of the bags in her teeth, dragging it around so that the belts hovered over his back, gently setting them down. As soon as she did, Blueblood started to breathe more deeply, sucking in more air with each breath. Finally, he stopped gasping and sat up to adjust the saddlebags. “D’you need anythin’ else?” Applejack asked him.

Blueblood shook his head. “No, I… I don’t need anything.”

Then he laid his head down on the grass, sadly staring into nothingness. Applejack stared at him. ‘What in Equestria is goin’ on with him?’ she asked herself. ‘Is he tryin’ t’ pull somethin’ or-‘

CRASH!

Applejack was suddenly showered in splinters. As soon as she could, she looked up. Her cart was tilted over, the shelves had been demolished, and it looked like a little yellow pegasus filly was to blame. The filly shook herself off, then looked around. Her expression went from guilty to terrified. “Your highness!” She knelt down in front of him. “Your highness, I’m so sorry! I didn’t know where I was going! I’ll pay attention! I’ll only fly at five miles an hour! I’ll never fly again! Just please don’t…”

Blueblood said nothing. Instead, he just kept digging at a spot in the grass. The filly looked up at Applejack. “Is he alright?”

Applejack shrugged. “Beats me. It dudn’t seem like mah cart gave him anythin’ serious.”

The filly’s eyes widened. “Oh.” She shrunk backwards. “Sorry.”

Applejack smiled. “Hey, it’s alright. Ain’t th’ worst foal-related disaster that cart’s seen, an’ it prob’ly won’t be th’ last. Though if ya’ could help me clean up th’ mess-“

A golden aura of magic surrounded the cart and pulled it upright. Then it picked up the refuse. Larger scraps of wood were crushed and nails removed. Plates were cleaned of food that had touched the ground and neatly stacked on top of the cart. Then, the trash was dumped evenly into two nearby trashcans. Applejack and the filly turned. Blueblood was still picking at grass as his horn extinguished. “Thanks,” Applejack said.

Blueblood said nothing.

“Alright,” Applejack told the filly, “Ah guess ya’ can go.”

The filly nodded, squeaked out a thank you, and flew off.

“BUT GO SLOW, OK?” Applejack yelled after her. Then Applejack turned to the cart. It was upright, but there wasn’t anything left to sell. Applejack sighed. ‘Well, guess Ah’m gettin’ a loan,’ she thought. She folded up the display table and moved towards the harness, but stopped for a moment. Then she turned back.

“Yer highness, would ya’ like a ride?”

<<***>>

After Blueblood had removed the remains of the shelves and Applejack had put the plates down below, the top of the cart was perfectly level. Thus, Blueblood could ride on the top as Applejack pulled him along. As ponies saw the two walking by, they started to talk. Blueblood, however, remained morosely silent except for feeding Applejack directions. At first, Applejack left him alone, but she could practically feel his dark mood behind her, and it gradually grew darker.

Finally, Applejack opened her mouth. “Want to talk about it?” she asked.

No answer.

“Y’know,” she continued, “bein’ caught havin’ a back spasm ain’t so embarrassing. It happens t’ mah Granny all th’ time.”

“That’s not what I’m worried about,” Blueblood mumbled.

Applejack's eyebrow rose. “What are ya’ worried about?”

Blueblood said nothing.

“Are ya’ worried people’ll think ye’r inbred ‘r somethin’?” Applejack turned back to the road. “Tain’t nothin’ t’ worry about. Mah parents are third cousins and even the town bully ain’t tried t’ use that one.”

“What if they were siblings?”

“Well, that’d be-“

Applejack stopped stock still and turned back around. Blueblood was glaring at her, face forcedly stony. “Ah’m sorry?” Applejack asked.

Blueblood sighed. “I guess I might as well tell you everything. You’ll know soon enough.” He took a breath. “I-“

“Actually, yer highness,” Applejack interrupted, “Ah think Ah’ll pass fer now. If you don’t wanna’ talk about it, Ah don’t wanna’ hear it.”

Blueblood stared at her. “You’re sure?” he asked.

Applejack nodded. “Believe me, Ah know what gossip can be like. Even if it wadn’t that bad, all things considered.” She turned back around and pulled the cart down the road. “Ah guess that explains why ya’ don’t like photographers,” she said. “An’ Ah guess Ah could see why ya’ sued that reporter.”

“He broke into my office,” Blueblood interrupted. “Almost nopony notices that, or the fact that I was one of several litigants in the lawsuit against his entire newspaper.” He sighed. “Then again, I did help the rumor spread. It sounded like something I’d do.”

Blueblood’s stomach grumbled. Applejack looked back as he pulled a small wooden box out of his saddlebags. He opened it to reveal a small salad, which he tucked into. “No dressin'?” Applejack asked.

Blueblood shook his head. “I probably couldn’t have it. My parents gave me Croan's Disease: in my case, that means that fats and oils make my arthritis worse, not to mention what they do to my intestines. It also means I can’t have a lot of fried foo-” He stopped and looked up. “Did I meet you at the last Gala?”

Applejack nodded. “Yeah. You called mah food ‘common carnival fare’.”

Blueblood turned pink. “I’m so sorry,” he said. “How much are fritters?“

“It’s alright,” Applejack said. “Ah had them on th’ house fer Rarity’s sake.”

“Ah.” Blueblood turned back to his salad, but paused. “About how much was everything on the-“

“Don’t worry, sir,” Applejack firmly told him. “Ah ain’t acceptin’ bits for things ya’ ain’t bought. An' don’t try hidin’ that bag on mah cart agin’; Ah’ll just bring it back.”

Blueblood put the bag back in his saddlebags. After a moment, though, he put it back on the cart. “Do you take commissions?”

Author's Note

At last (and with my heartiest apologies), it is here! And you might be able to see why I sat on it for so long, at least for gravity's sake. (EDIT: I have clarified a few things, as suggested by Jedi Wolf.) As always, tell me what you think.

Alright, now that I have the mane six covered, I imagine you want me to continue with the stories. I have plans for at least one more chapter for each of them, and most of them have at least the idea of a story arc. In addition, I have ideas for several other mares, including Zecora, Mayor Mare, Gilda, Sunset Shimmer, Trixie, and even Lyra and Sweetie Drops (due to character-based concerns, I'm still parsing that one). So, yeah, if anyone wants to comment on a story they want expanded on, please, comment away. I'll probably also try to get a chapter for Scrap Basket out this month as well, as well as something for a friend and possibly my own professional writing, both of which will be available over on my DeviantArt account of the same username. So, yeah, whichever one receives the most votes is the one I'll do first.

Blueblood the Exile - Trixie

“THE SECOND WORLD KILLS AGAIN!”

The cool morning air near the capitol building was pierced by a booming shout. Standing on the steps was a white unicorn with a blond mane and dark bags under his eyes, shouting to the passers-by. “WITHIN THE LAST MONTH, SEVEN MORE PRISONERS HAVE STARVED TO DEATH IN COMMUNIST ‘HOSPITALS’! MOST OF THESE HAVE BEEN IMPRISONED ONLY FOR DEMANDING BETTER CONDITIONS OR ATTEMPTING TO LEAVE! DON’T BECOME COMPLACENT JUST BECAUSE THE MASS KILLINGS OF OLD HAVE STOPPED USING SWORDS! OPEN YOUR HEARTS TO THOSE SUFFERING! REJECT THE NEW ACT AND IMPOSE TRADE SANCTIONS INSTEAD! WE MUST CONTINUE TO PRESS THE SECOND WORLD UNTIL IT IS PRESSED OUT OF EXISTANCE!”

“VERY IMPRESSIVE LUNGS, NEPHEW!”

Blueblood jumped. A frowning Princess Luna landed in front of him. “I could hear thee from our room in the castle.”

Blueblood frowned. “Thank you, Aunt Luna,” he said. He turned to the crowd of ponies walking past him. “If only everyone else was paying attention.”

“Well, they hear thee,” Luna said, “and that might be all thou canst accomplish at the moment.”

“That might be all thou canst accomplish,” Blueblood scoffed. “Meanwhile, we’ll just keep giving them money and looking the other way.”

“We are not looking the other way,” Luna snapped at Blueblood. “Our trade is requisite on improvements on their part. We are trying to build good relations with them. Or dost thou desire a war so soon after the last one?”

“No, I just...” Blueblood put his head in his hooves and sighed. “I’m sorry. It’s just that this came at a very bad time.”

Luna’s frown softened. “I heard of thy father. I am sorry for thee.”

“It was a long time coming,” Blueblood told her. “Even when I was a colt. Some nights he’d come home, sit up with a bottle, and just not slee-”

Blueblood yawned. Luna stared at him. “Blueblood,” she said, “dost thou have anything to live for beyond this?”

“I tried everything,” Blueblood said, rubbing his eyes. “New books, exercise, I even tried that new role playing game when Shining Armor had an opening. But this is always in the back of my mind. If it was just Brussia that fell, I’d understand. It’s awful, but it was awful before the tyrants took over. But they’ve conquered my homeland, too. Those are my people suffering. And I can’t ignore them.”

“What of friends?” Luna asked.

Blueblood frowned. “I protest for countries most ponies don’t know exist. That’s not a very appealing quality these days. Neither is a thorough knowledge of Polegarian history considered especially attractive.”

Luna nodded. “Yes, I see. I have struggled to bond with others as well. Did my sister try to set you up with a date?”

“With her student.” Blueblood’s head whipped back to Luna. “Did Aunt Celestia honestly-“

“Yes. She took me to a public house on ‘singles night’. I managed to startle all of the patrons with my forwardness, but Celestia and I were quite entertained.”

Blueblood nodded. “Twilight and I enjoyed ourselves too, though nothing romantic came out of it. We still write to each oth-“

Blueblood’s eyes widened. “Oh, rats!” He pounded off down the steps, into the crowd. He tore down the street and skidded around a corner, blindly tearing off down that street too. As Blueblood ran, a wave of magic ran over his body, changing him into a green unicorn with a red mane. He whipped around another corner, jumped over a moving cart, and smacked into a door. Then he fell on his back and stared at the stars running around his head.

“Are you alright?”

Blueblood shook the stars from their orbits. Looking down on him was a young, yellow mare with her green mane tied up in a ponytail. “Yeah,” he said as he got up, his high-class accent hidden. “Yeah, I’m good.” He smiled nervously. “Sorry about that. I just remembered I needed to send a letter.”

The mare looked at the post office door. “It’s closed today,” she stated.

Blueblood turned around and read the posted hours. “…well fancy that.” He turned back to the mare. “Again, I’m so sorry.”

“That’s alright,” the mare said. “I’ve been doing that a lot this semester. I’m getting my master’s degree.”

“What’re you studying?”

“History. I wanted to focus on Eastern Europe.”

Blueblood stared at her. “You’re joking.” He grinned. “That was my field of study!”

The mare did a double take. “Really? Did you go to-“

“Yep! We probably have the same professors.” Blueblood motioned with his hoof. “If you want to talk about it over lunch, I know a place.”

The mare stared at him for a moment, but then she smiled. “Lead the way.”

Blueblood motioned down the street and the two walked together. “My name’s Steel Crown,” Blueblood said.

“Basila.”

<*>

“Hello, Blueblood!”

Blueblood, in his true colors, looked across the main hall of the museum to see his aunt Luna waving at him. He smiled at her. “Hello!” he said, walking over to her. “How’ve things been?”

“Decent overall. My work schedule is still very uncluttered and…”

Luna yawned into Blueblood’s face. “I can reschedule,” Blueblood suggested.

“No, it’s alright,” Luna said. “I just had a late night with Cerberus. How’re you?”

Blueblood shrugged. “Alright. I’ve got my first dinner invitation after my… thing a few months ago.”

Luna noticed Blueblood frowning. “Blueblood,” she asked, “are you sure you’re…”

“Yeah, I just had a flashback,” he said. “I might drive myself into a tailspin, but I pick myself up fast. She’s gone, there’s nothing I can do.” Blueblood smiled again. “So, you wanted to show me something?”

Luna nodded. “Right this way.”

Luna turned and led Blueblood to the end of the hall. On that end was an exhibit dedicated to the Fertile Crescent. “Oh,” Luna said. “I thought it was going to be here. Uh, wait here a moment, Blueblood; I’m going to find out what happened to it.”

Luna turned and left. Blueblood looked in his program. On the third page, he found that the museum was housing an exhibit on the Slavic cultures. He hmmed his approval, but then he looked up. ‘Why would she need-‘

“For brother spake to brother ‘this is mine, and that is also mine.’ And the princes began to pronounce of a paltry thing, ‘this is great’…”

Blueblood turned his head. Walking down the hall was a blue mare with a white mane, talking to herself. Blueblood felt he recognized her, but he couldn’t remember from where. Shortly, though, he recognized her. He shook his head, but stopped himself. Then Blueblood smiled, and he walked over to her.

“…and themselves amongst them to forge feuds; and the heathens from all sides-“

“-advanced with victories against the Brussian land,” Blueblood interrupted. “Oh how far the hawk followed, smiting the birds into the sea, and Igor’s brave host will rise no more!”

The mare stopped and turned around. Blueblood smiled at her. “The Tale of Igor’s Campaign,” Blueblood explained. “You have good taste.”

The mare stared at him for a moment, then smiled and bowed. “Of cou-“ She stopped herself. “I mean, thank you, sir. It’s been one of my favorites since high school.”

Blueblood frowned, but only for a moment. Then his smile returned. “It’s also very appropriate, given the Slavic exhibit. Do you work for the museum?”

The mare nodded. “Yes. Did you need something?”

“Well, my aunt did, but she seems to have gotten lost.”

“Oh? What does she look like?”

Blueblood stared at her for a moment. “You don’t- oh never mind. She’ll find herself.”

“OK.” The mare looked at him. “Forgive me for asking,” the mare went on, “but I feel like I should know your face.”

Blueblood frowned. “You probably should. It was all over the tabloids.”

The mare shook her head, eyes screwed shut. “Ugh, don’t tell Tri- me about tabloids. They’re utterly loathsome wastes of paper.” The mare opened her eyes again. “But since I’m supposed to know who you are, who are you?”

Blueblood’s frown deepened. “Blueblood,” he said.

The mare blinked at him, then shrugged. “I got nothing.”

“Thank God for small favors,” Blueblood muttered. He smiled. “Now that you know my name, can I know yours?”

The mare’s mouth dropped open. She quickly picked it back up, though. “It’s Trixie,” she said. “Does that mean anything to you?”

“Not really,” Blueblood said. “Were you in the tabloids, too?”

Blueblood managed not to giggle at Trixie’s face as it shifted back and forth between mild indignation and moderate relief. “Yes,” she finally said, face settled in a small frown. “And the papers, too. It’s a part of my past I’d rather not talk about.”

Blueblood nodded. “I understand that. I hope that doesn’t extend to all of your past. I’m quite interested in knowing how you stumbled onto Brussian epic poetry. That’s hardly a common choice.”

“History was my favorite subject in school,” she said. “Well, second favorite. Anyways, when I was eight, I had to do a project on another country’s history.” Trixie smirked. “Other students chose ‘safe’ countries like Great Bitain or Prance, but Trixie wanted something more daring, so she chose Brussia, the largest country on Earth! Of course, she soon found that the school library was inadequately stocked in that regard, but Trixie was no quitter! She slogged to the-”

The story stopped when Trixie noticed Blueblood staring at her. “I did the paper and I got an ‘A’,” she quickly concluded. “But I got curious about the literature, like Dogstoyevsky and Boltstoy. Sadly, it’s not like Equestria, and anything that’s not a classic is really hard to find.”

“I actually have several very good books,” Blueblood said. “I’d happily loan them to you, for a favor.”

Trixie looked at him. “What favor?”

Blueblood smiled. “Let me buy you lunch?”

Trixie stared at him, a small frown in the corner of her mouth. Blueblood’s smile faded as Trixie’s frown deepened. Then her frown softened. “We’d have to eat here,” she said. “I don’t have enough time left in my break to go anywhere else.”

“That’s alright,” Blueblood said.

<*>

“But the Archduke forget he was in the first car behind the locomotive, so the Tsar just refused to let the Archduke into the dining car!”

Basila pounded the side of Blueblood’s bed laughing as Blueblood rolled around on the floor. “Oh my gosh!” she wheezed. “How do you know all of this?”

“I like history,” Blueblood said, wiping his eyes. “There’s nothing wrong with obsessive study if the subjects are already dead.”

“Yeah, but you know so much. I never heard-“ She stopped for a moment. “I mean, it’s kind of a pity you don’t get to hear this sort of history in school.”

Blueblood noticed her smile droop a little. “Are you alright?”

She looked away from him. “Yeah, of course. I just misspoke earlier.”

Blueblood looked at her for a moment more before he nodded and turned away. “Kazhi, che mnogo u doma.”

He heard Basila jump. “What? Uh, I mean, what did you say?”

“You don’t have to pretend with me,” Blueblood told her. “Despite your best efforts, you were still born and raised Polegarian. A few things are going to slip out that the well-trained mind is going to notice.”

Basila shook herself for a moment, then composed herself. “I didn’t want to attract attention,” she said, just as unaccented. “Ponies from Second World countries are still viewed as spies, in case you haven’t noticed. Thankfully, my cousin was a diplomat for Equestria, so I got to be coached.”

Blueblood nodded. “I really get off easy. Having your grandparents killed by the Second Worlders does soften things up a little.”

Basila stared at him. “…are the rumors around campus are true?” she asked. “Are you really the last Tsar’s son?”

Blueblood glared at her for a moment, then dispelled the magical disguise around himself. “I am,” he said. “I moved here from Great Bitain to go to college. It helped that my aunt Celestia lived here, but I mainly wanted something a little less... intimidating than Oxbridge.” He paused for a moment, getting only silence. “Expected someone taller?”

Basila blushed. “No. I was just expecting you to be… it’s stupid. Everyone knows the government lies to us, but I still thought you’d be this, this-”

“-Neighzi collaborator?” Blueblood rumbled. “That’s not your fault; you weren’t taught any better.”

“But it’s so wrong!” she spurted. “They said you were a self-interested snob, but you’re our most prominent voice for freedom! It’s so…” Basila rolled over, away from Blueblood. “I just can’t believe I was so off the mark.”

She felt Blueblood sit down next to her and lay a hoof on her shoulder. “You know now,” Blueblood said. “That’s what matters.”

Basila just frowned for a while, but then she sighed. “Yes, I suppose that’s true.” She looked at Blueblood. “Why do you hide it?” she asked.

“I wanted to have a life,” Blueblood said. “Being next in line to a throne tends to leave you without a whole lot of privacy. I also want an opportunity to blend in with ponies that are less famous than I am, to have a life. Even if that doesn’t really work.”

“Wow,” Basila said. “You’re really not what I was expecting.”

“This doesn’t change anything, does it?” Blueblood asked her nervously. “I mean, you’re not sca-“

Basila kissed him. “No,” she said. “I loved you before you were a prince and I love you now. If anything, I love you the more for who you’ve revealed to me.”

Blueblood kissed her back. “Thank you,” he said. He poured out two glasses of cheap red wine and handed one to Basila. “To Polegaria.”

Cling. “And to rule of the people.”

Blueblood nodded. “If that is what they wish.” He drank. “Goodness knows they’ve earned it.”

Blueblood missed Basila’s frown between his two sentences.

<*>

“So, you enjoy working here?”

Trixie frowned as she took a bite of her nachos. “Sort of. I do the reenactments, so that’s a lot of fun.”

A dark-blue earth stallion walked up to Trixie. “Hey, Trixie, can I-“ He noticed Blueblood. “Oh, is this a bad time?”

“No, go ahead,” Trixie told him.

“OK, we need to have those exhibits from the Picksrael collection moved to storage by tonight. Can you do that?”

Trixie shrugged. “Sure.”

“Good. That’s the Middle East Picksrael, not the Equestrian one.”

Trixie let out a tiny chuckle. “I’ll remember that.”

“OK. Enjoy the rest of your date.”

The stallion walked off. As soon as he left the food court, Trixie scowled as she tugged a small hill of nachos free of the others and forced it into her mouth. “It wasn’t funny the first three-hundred times, why would it be funny now?” she growled under her breath.

“What’s the matter?” Blueblood asked her.

Trixie said nothing, just continuing to eat. “Is it because…”

Trixie shoved her nachos aside. “Yes,” she growled, “Trixie is Maremon. No, I don’t wear the ‘magic underwear’; that requires a ceremony I have yet to undergo. Neither do I believe that all buffalo are Jewish: just one little group of them that might not exist anymore. Are we clear?”

Blueblood, surprised, nodded. “Yes,” he said. “Transparently.”

Trixie groaned. “I’m sorry,” she said. “It’s just, those jokes get old after twenty-seven years and I’m sick of hearing them.”

Trixie rested her chin in her hoof and just looked at her food. “You don’t really like your job, do you?” Blueblood asked.

“I hate it,” she replied. “Apart from doing the demonstrations, my only job is to move exhibits from one end of the museum to the other. I’m bored out of my mind when I’m not getting laughed at for... things I don’t want to talk about. I also don’t get paid very much, which I wouldn’t mind so much if I actually liked the work. My old job barely got me by, but I loved it.”

“What was your old job?” Blueblood asked.

“It doesn’t matter,” Trixie sighed. “I can’t go back to it.”

<*>

Blueblood stumbled into his room. He was wet and absolutely filthy, mostly sprayed with mud and foliage, but with a little bit of cake. He pulled off his suit and threw it onto the floor. Unconsciously, his hooves carried him to his dresser, where he noticed a photo of him and Basila. Blueblood knocked it onto the floor, then he sat on the floor, head in his hooves.

He heard a knock at his door. At this point, only one other pony had the key to his front door. “C’min,” Blueblood said.

Certainly enough, when the door opened, Luna was there, frowning at him. “Blueblood,” she said, “I believe you owe me an explanation.”

“I’m sorry,” Blueblood said. “Can we just not talk about it right now?”

He heard hoofsteps moving towards him. “If it was almost anything else, absolutely,” Luna told him. “However, what happened last night was just… not you. You were drunk, you were a lout, you even flirted with another mare! You have a girlfriend!”

Blueblood glared up at her. “Not. Anymore.” Blueblood reached behind the dresser and pulled out a magazine. “Here.” He magically shoved it in his aunt’s face. “Read it.”

Luna pulled it out of her face with a frown, but she read. After two seconds, her heart sank. On the front cover were two pictures of the same stallion, one screaming from the steps of Congress, the other sitting at a cheap café drinking coffee. The headline read ‘PRINCE IN DISGUISE: ROYAL LOVER TELLS ALL!’ “Oh my,” she said.

“Everything’s there,” Blueblood said. “Every little secret and not one of them is wrong.” Tears started to run down his cheeks. “We had a fight about my… my royal status two days before it was published, and she… she left her key in my mailbox the day of. All I could think last night was that… if she wanted a royal brat, I could be one.” He looked up at Luna, his eyes red and puffy. “I don’t understand. I just… I just…”

Luna laid her leg around Blueblood’s shoulders as he wept. Blueblood leaned into her, shuddering and sending his tears down her barrel.

<*>

“What if I could help you?” Blueblood asked Trixie.

Trixie looked up at him. “Even if you could, I’m not interested,” she told him. “I can’t ever do it again. It took a royal favor for me to find this job, and you see what it got me.” She looked back at her nachos.

“What about your old job?” Blueblood asked.

Trixie’s hooves pounded on the table. “You know what that was, your highness. Yes, Trixie remembered your face. It was on the front page right next to your name.”

“Then why’d you ask me who I was?” Blueblood asked.

“Because I thought you wanted to leave the past alone! I thought after everything you had in your past, you just wanted to put it behind you and not have random ponies point and laugh at it!” Trixie sniffled. “You know how many times I didn’t get chased off by a crowd in the past year? Two. And one was because the Nightmares invaded. But you won’t find my name on the list of ponies that fought them, oh, no. I’m still just Trixie, the Wicked Witch of the Midwest! Provided I’m not remembered as the Queen of the Diamond Dogs.”

Blueblood blinked. “I never heard of that one.”

Trixie wiped her eyes. “They thought I could find them jewels. I thought I’d found somewhere I wouldn’t be chased away from.” Trixie sniffled again. “But all I got in the end was a brief flash of hope that things would be the way they were. But that’s never going to happen, even if the princesses intervene. So I just want to live out the rest of my life as a nopony. Greatness can go die.”

Trixie slumped over the table, putting her head in her hooves.

<*>

“Maybe she had a reason,” Blueblood suggested.

Luna frowned at him. “Such as?”

Blueblood blew his nose into a tissue. “I don’t know, maybe she was being threatened by Second Worlders.”

“Then why didn’t she come to us?” Luna asked him.

“What if they told her to kill me, but she just…”

“Humiliated you?” Luna asked. “Without even saying a word to you?”

“We just had a fight,” Blueblood protested. “Maybe she-“

“That doesn’t make any sense,” Luna told him.

”She had to have a reason!”

“Why?”

“Because…” Blueblood sniffled. “Because…”

<*>

“My last semi-successful show was a pity booking,” Trixie growled. “By one of the Elements of Harmony. If Trixie cannot get by on her own merits, she’s a failure who deserves to take what she can get.”

“Right now, you’re utterly miserable,” Blueblood pointed out. “Yeah, you used to be a jerk, but you know better now and you’re trying to improve. You deserve a second chance, and I can still help you get one.”

Trixie looked up at him, Blueblood looked back at her. “I actually got to see one of your shows,” he said. “You making Upper Crust’s mane come to life was honestly pretty refreshing. I even thought that joke you made about me was hilarious. Yeah, you need to tone it down, but you can do that.”

Trixie shook her head. “No.”

<*>

“What if she’s the only mare who ever loves me?” Blueblood asked his aunt.

<*>

“What if no-one buys it?” Trixie asked Blueblood.

<*>

“What if-“

”SARD YOUR WHAT-IF’S!”

The royal voice echoed around the room. It took the little pony a few seconds to shake off the disorientation of facing it point blank. “Pardon?”

<*>

“Blueblood, you are a sweet, intelligent young stallion,” Luna told him. “Mares the world over would be thrilled to go out with you, if you only ask them. I know it hurts right now, and you can take your time to recover yourself. But one bad breakup shouldn’t be enough to sour you to the idea.”

Blueblood wiped his eye. “And if the next one’s just like her?”

<*>

“I’m not saying it’ll be easy,” Blueblood told Trixie. “Heck, the first few times will be hard regardless of what I can do. I’m not going to just throw you out on Bridleway before you’ve gotten yourself together. But look at your life right now. Do you really want to stay here?”

Trixie bit her lip. “No,” she answered. “Why are you doing this?”

“Because you’re a good entertainer that can put this chance to good use,” Blueblood replied.

<*>

“Regardless, you need something to do,” Luna said. “Having more friends can help you against future heartbreak. Even just having a life can help you keep your head above the water.”

“That’s going to be easy,” Blueblood muttered, “especially with next week’s hot article.”

“You still have me,” Luna told him. “And I believe it’s about time we actually did something as aunt and nephew. It can be private, if you want, just so long as it relaxes you.”

Blueblood thought for several seconds. “We could just hang out,” Blueblood suggested. “Unless there was some-“

“If you’re happy, I’m happy,” Luna told him.

<*>

Trixie sat and eyed Blueblood. “Did Twilight put you up to this?” she asked.

“No,” Blueblood told her. “She mentioned you, yes. But I’m doing this because I like you and I want to help you. Will you let me?”

Blueblood could see Trixie’s lips pinch together, but he remained silent. She opened her mouth, but quickly closed it. The seconds stretched on as Trixie thought out her answer. Finally, she said “What does Tri… what do I have to lose?”

Blueblood put his hoof next to hers. “Whenever you’re ready,” he said.

The clock struck the hour; Trixie rose from her seat and walked away. But then she turned around. “Let’s start tonight.”

Blueblood turned to speak to her, but he stopped himself. “If that’s what you want,” he said instead.

"It is," Trixie told him. "It's time Trixie lived again."

Author's Note

Sorry I'm late. Got wrapped up in a Christmas present from my sister (LEGO Harry Potter, Years 1-4). Plus, this was a tricky chapter to write, and I'm still not sure I've got it. A lot of the stuff in this chapter comes from real history, although some license has been granted. I invite you to figure out from where, if you've got the inclination. Sage_Brony7 in particular, I hope you enjoyed this. In two weeks, we return to Fluttershy.

Blueblood the Babysitter - Cutie Mark Crusaders

Author's Note

I am so sorry this is so late. I went through a lot between the last chapter and this one, including a temporary job, a change in house, and an impending move. But most of all, this story just kicked my keister to write. Honestly, when I started, the Cutie Mark Crusaders were my least favorite characters on the show, (short of Tirek, but that's the 'good' kind of I-hate-him). They're just not a character type that appeals to me: sweet but kinda' dumb. However, not too long ago, I realized that there were things about the crusaders that I enjoyed. Namely, their interplay with each other was fun for me. That really helped make this story easier to write, and I actually had fun writing their dialogue with each other (as I have in the past.) So, here is the story. Please, tell me what you think.

Blueblood the Babysitter - Cutie Mark Crusaders

The double doors to the vast meeting room burst open with a loud BOOM! As the members of castle staff jumped in their seats, a white unicorn stomped up the central aisle. The ponies in the aisle seats blanched as they saw him scowling, even if his vision never wavered. Their fear rippled through the other audience members as the unicorn finally reached the raised podium, ascended the small stairs, and turned to scowl at them.

He looked almost immaculate, as always. Not one spot in his white fur nor one black hair in his thick ponytail out of place, and his jet black eyes blazed with inner fury. He wore a midnight black suit with an equally black tie, a large steel medallion pinned to his lapel. The only detail out of place were the dark bags under his eyes and the crows’ feet on either side of them. In one smooth movement, he pulled out a file, laid them on the podium, then leapt up, placing his front hooves on the podium.

“Good morning,” he growled, his voice cold and low.

“GOOD MORNING, YOUR HIGHNESS!” the audience shouted back.

“Thank goodness you got one thing right,” the pony muttered to himself. “Now,” he said to the crowd, “I understand that some of you were just recently hired for the Grand Galloping Gala last night, so you probably don’t know me. If I were to ask you who the most powerful pony in Equestria is, short of Princesses Celestia and Luna, who would you say? Naturally, most of you would say Cadance, or Princess Mi Amore Cadenza if you stood on formalities, as you should. You’re wrong. The most powerful pony in Equestria is above her and right below the two royal sisters, in just the right position to keep everything from going crazy. That pony is me. I am Prince Blueblood, Director of Internal Affairs and Chief of Security, and what I saw last night disgusted me.”

Blueblood opened the file on the podium. “We had several issues regarding event invitees, several of which I witnessed in disguise. Most of them were easily dealt with, but I wanted to address three cases in particular, all of which were dismal failures on the part of castle staff.” His horn lit up and an image of an orange pony in a cowboy hat was projected from above the door onto the wall behind him. “Ticket number 105,” Blueblood continued. “Applejack from Ponyville. I understand she set up a food cart on castle grounds during the event. As a quick question, what is the proper procedure regarding independent vendors of food and beverages that wish to sell wares at the Grand Galloping Gala?”

The room was silent. “Come on,” he chided with a smile, “I’m not going to bite.”

One blue stallion timorously raised a hoof. When Blueblood nodded at him, he cleared his throat. “There isn’t one?” he asked.

“And why is that?” Blueblood asked just as sweetly.

The blue stallion cast his eyes around the crowd, but everypony else just looked away from him. “Uh, it... makes us look cheap?”

Blueblood nodded. “Thank you. One final question. If you could tell me this now, why couldn’t you tell her that LAST! NIGHT!”

Blueblood slammed his hooves on the podium, which rattled. Everypony else jumped in their seats. “Hundreds of foreign dignitaries and business owners attend the Grand Galloping Gala each year,” Blueblood snapped, “my false identity included. They use this as an opportunity to size up Canterlot and Equestria in general. If they see us at our biggest, most dignified event with cotton candy stalls and fortune tellers, as if this was some grade school fundraiser, down go their opinions and off. Goes. Their. Business.”

He pulled out another paper. “Let’s move on to the next worst event of the night. Ticket number 127: Pinkamena Diane Pie, also of Ponyville.” The image on the projector changed to a pink mare with a big, wide grin on her face. Blueblood rolled his eyes when he saw the photo, but he turned back to the crowd. “This one I also got to witness firsthoof, at least in part. I actually almost got splattered by a cake she sent flying. However, I had to find out indirectly about the time she took over the orchestra and forced them to play a tacky little foal’s tune.” He leaned over the podium. “Anyone care to explain why she was still allowed to be at the gala?”

An orange pegasus with a blue mane raised his hoof. “Pickpockets, sir. Several guests had complained about valuables being stolen and we were combing the castle trying to find them.”

Blueblood’s scowl deepened. “And you couldn’t deal with the attempted crowdsurfer later because…”

“She’d already left by the time we caught all five pickpockets, sir. Most of our men were on that search-and-rescue with Princess Luna.”

Blueblood’s scowl grew. Regardless, he nodded. “Yes, I heard about that,” he growled. “However, I did not know that…” His scowl faded and he sighed. “It doesn’t matter. Good job, Corporal Sentry. That item can be disregarded.” His scowl returned in force. “However, that does not excuse our last case.”

He changed the image again, this time to a yellow statue of a pegasus with a pink mane and a wide, insincere, pasted-on grin. Blueblood’s lips all but vanished before he hissed. “Ticket number 126: Fluttershy of Ponyville. I don’t know about you all, but I’m noticing a trend here. Unlike the other guests, she has actually committed a crime: animal harassment and reckless endangerment, both serious crimes with a combined punishment of a 20,000 bit fine and five years in federal, big-boy prison. Anypony care to explain where they were when this happened?”

The ponies in the audience shuffled their hooves. “I thought Greenhooves was on duty,” one of them called.

Blueblood’s eye twitched. “I’m sorry,” he rumbled. “I must’ve misheard you. Do you mean to say that the decrepit little madman who once watered a very nice ficus bush from Saddle Arabia with apple juice and who asked me why silver peacocks didn’t like pork chops was the pony in charge of keeping the animals safe and at bay during a major event?

The pony’s hooves shuffled. “Uh, yeah, didn’t you sign off on tha…”

Under Blueblood’s fiery glare, the pony wilted. Then Blueblood shook his head with a grunt. “Whatever,” he growled. “I’ll deal with him later. In any case,” he continued, “Fluttershy has been charged and will be-“

“-fined and sent back to Ponyville with a payment schedule.”

Blueblood slumped over as he heard the pony come up behind him. “Good morning, Princess Celestia,” he groaned. “I was just going to find you and ask about your invitees to the Gala.”

He didn’t look up but he could feel her glaring at him. “Thank you, Blueblood,” she told him, “but the situation is well in hand. I have spoken to all of them, and they will not be repeating their crimes.”

Blueblood looked up but he didn’t turn to look at her. “Your highness,” he said, “not that I don’t trust you, but three of your friends, possibly five, were responsible for various indiscretions last night. In addition to the three large problems I mentioned with Applejack, Pinkie Pie, and Fluttershy, we have Officer Candidate Rainbow Dash, who I’m told has assaulted several ponies in a bid for attention from her superiors, and Rarity, who made herself a professional nuisance to my alter ego.” He paused to take a deep breath. “Thanks to them, the night turned into a disaster. Furthermore, all of them were responsible for the Canterlot Garden Party turning into a fiasco. So forgive me if I doubt your word, but it just cost us-”

“-nothing,” Celestia interrupted. “Blueblood, the individuals I deal with and invite to major events, some notwithstanding, are very understanding of the occasional fiasco, as most people are. I made sure that these people were willing to do that as well before I left last night, which you would know if you hadn’t spent all night in your office. Everything that went wrong will be disregarded by next week, as in the case of the Garden Party. As to the conduct of my guests, I will remind you that I am perfectly capable of mitigating any punishment to any resident of Equestria as long as I can justify it. I have no idea why Fluttershy did what she did last night, but based on my assessment of her character, it is not something that will happen twice. Thus, under the assumption that her reformation is already taken care of, I have reduced her sentence to restitution.”

Blueblood scowled, but said nothing as his aunt dismissed the crowd. Instead, he just held his face in his hooves as the ponies filed out. He felt Celestia approach. “Blueblood?” she asked. “Look at me.”

Slowly and stiffly, he turned to face her. She wasn’t quite glaring at him, but her frown was unmistakable. “Blueblood, what’s wrong?” she asked.

Blueblood set his face. “Nothing,” he said. “Work is proceeding as usual. Nothing especially interesting to report.”

One corner of Celestia’s mouth turned down. Before he could bolster his case, though, she sighed. “Alright then,” she said. “Carry on.” She then turned around and trod out of the room. Blueblood watched her leave, opening his mouth to say something, then closing it with a growl and walking out the other way.

<*>

Later, one Thursday afternoon in Ponyville, the door to the crystal tree-castle opened and a purple pony stood in the doorway. “Hi! Welco…“

The smile disappeared from Twilight’s face as she noticed Blueblood, and the bottom of his stomach dropped out of his body in response. He was aware of being well-groomed, but several of his hairs were out of place and his hooves had gotten quite dusty from the last two hours. One corner of his mouth was dotted with frosting, which he quickly wiped away. Twilight straightened up and cleared her throat. “Good afternoon, Prince Blueblood,” she recited. “Please, come in.”

Blueblood stood for a moment, his saddlebags suddenly feeling very heavy and the sun very hot. Blueblood’s face tightened for a moment, but he quickly bowed. “Thank you, Princess Twilight Sparkle,” he replied.

The two continued into the building and up a flight of stairs. Blueblood noted with some sadness that the building was dominated by the same dark colors as were on the outside, though the bright yellow carpet and the matching ribbons did make the interior look brighter. “So, are you enjoying your new castle?” he asked.

Twilight glanced back at him for a moment. As soon as he turned to face her, though, she pointed her eyes forward again. “It was a little much to adjust to,” she said. “Especially given… what happened to the Golden Oaks library. However, I’m settling in well.”

After that, there was silence again, Twilight still looking away from Blueblood. When it passed ten seconds, Blueblood opened his mouth again. “How’s Spike doing?” he asked.

“He’s OK,” Twilight said. “He’s not very fond of you, given what happened at the Gala between you and... one of the guests.”

Blueblood stared at her for a moment. “What do you mean?”

“I promised I wouldn’t talk about it,” Twilight flatly told Blueblood.

“Alright,” Blueblood said.

Twilight looked back at Blueblood. “So, what brings you here?” she asked. “Business?”

Blueblood opened his mouth, but his practiced lines had abandoned him. Instead, he nodded. “Yes.”

Twilight’s face soured. “We can discuss it in the main study room,” she said.

Instantly, she turned right. Inside one of the rooms were a good number of waist-high bookshelves, all filled, and off to the right was a simple table, which Twilight moved to sit at. Blueblood joined her. “Alright,” Twilight said, “what’s the problem?”

Blueblood looked at Twilight’s weary face for a moment, then bent over. “Twilight,” he said, “I’ve come with staffing concerns.” Out of his saddlebags, he pulled out four forms. “I understand you have the help of five other ponies in matters of national security.”

Twilight’s frown deepened. “Yes, what’s your point?” she asked.

“They are performing work for the government of Equestria,” Blueblood said as he laid five forms on the table, “and we haven’t received their insurance forms yet. Since this work is potentially fatal, we require that those involved have life and health insurance on record with the federal government, to ensure that they have an option should worse come to worse. Rainbow Dash’s information we have already, but that leaves the other four Element Bearers.”

Twilight’s frown remained in place. “So why do you need me?” she asked. “Couldn’t you just mail the forms out?”

Blueblood shuffled in his seat. “Well, that’s another thing.” He magically reached into his saddlebags and pulled out five more forms, about three pages each. “Since you’re a princess now, you are the de jure leader of their group. As such, you’ll need to fill out these Forms of Employment as well.”

Twilight picked up one of the forms and rifled through it. As she read, her frown deepened until she finally put the form down. “Alright,” she said, “I’ll fill these out and have them to you on Monday.”

Blueblood blushed. “Actually,” he said. “Due to the long time it took to notice this issue, I need to have them by eight-forty-five.”

Twilight’s eyes widened. “What?” she snapped. “Do you know how much work this is?”

“Nopony’s happy about this,” Blueblood interjected. “I just got told about it this morning. However, Equestrian law gives you ninety days to file this from the date of hiring. Counting from the date you were crowned a princess, that’s in three days, which is Sunday.” Blueblood let out a breath. “I’m going to be back on the train at seven, and I’ll be able to file the forms tomorrow. That’ll save you the penalty.”

Twilight rolled her eyes. “Yeah, it’d be terrible if I got fined a month after the federal funds for the library ‘just went missing.’”

The frown on Blueblood’s face deepened. “I’m sorry about that,” he said, “and I’m working as hard as I can to get them back to you. I just need those forms by today. As princess, you should be able to get all of the information at City Hall, so all that you need is for them to fill out the insurance forms and sign the employment forms.”

“Oh, is that all?” Twilight growled as she glared at Blueblood.

Blueblood simply shrugged. “I’m sorry, your highness, but I…”

He trailed off under Twilight’s glare, and soon turned away. The tension hung in the air between the two for a good ten seconds. Then Twilight groaned. “Oh, for crying out loud,” she muttered. ”SPIIIIIIIKE”

Instantly, Spike burst into the room. “Yeah, Twilight, what’s…”

He stopped the instant he saw Blueblood. Immediately, Blueblood raised his hoof in a feeble attempt at a wave, but Spike scowled at him until he lowered his hoof again.

Twilight stood up. “We need to get the others,” she told Spike. “Immediately. You go after Pinkie and Fluttershy, I’ll get everyone else. Tell them to meet us at City Hall.”

Spike’s frown deepened a little. “Got it,” he said.

He spun on his heel and opened the door to leave, but three fillies poured into the room. One was a yellow earth pony with a pink bow in her red mane. The second was a unicorn, white with pink and purple curls. The last was orange, with a purple mane and slightly undersized wings. All of them were bearing khaki saddlebags, though the unicorns bags were much more ornate and stylish. “Hey, Twilight!” the yellow one said. “We’re ready for Twilight Time!”

Blueblood noticed Twilight quickly put a smile on her face. “Hey, girls,” she said. “Look, I’m really sorry to cancel on such short notice again, but something just came up.” Blueblood noticed Twilight pause, then take a deep breath. “It’s going to be a while, but I can’t put it off. So it looks like the nature walk’s going to have to wait.

Gradually throughout Twilight’s explanation, the faces on the fillies started to fall. “Aw, nuts,” the orange one said.

“I’m sorry,” Twilight repeated. “I know I had to reschedule, but”

“It’s more than that,” the white one said. “Diamond Tiara’s been after us.”

Twilight sighed. “Not again,” she muttered.

“Yeah,” the unicorn continued. “She told us it’d been almost a year after she got her cutie mark and that if we didn’t hurry up, we’d never get them.”

“That’s preposterous,” Twilight said. “There’s no cut-off date to get a cutie mark, it just comes in when it’s ready.”

“Yew keep sayin’ that, Twilight,” the one with the bow told her, “but Ah looked through mah family tree, and I’m th’ longest anyone’s gone without getting a cutie mark. Even Applejack’s getting’ nervous.”

“Same here,” the pegasus admitted. “My brother’s been looking around for professional help, though he never admits it. What if we’re just the first permanent blank-flanks in Equestria?”

Blueblood’s heart sank as Twilight’s mouth turned down. Instinctively, he bit down on his tongue as he felt his spirit mire. He wished to himself that he could do something. Then lightning flashed through his mind. He opened his mouth for a moment, but wavered. ‘This is a stupid idea’ he thought. Then he frowned for a moment and cleared his throat.

“Actually,” Blueblood said, “I can handle your nature walk.”

Twilight’s jaw dropped as she and the three fillies turned to stare at him. “I’m sorry?” Twilight asked.

Blueblood’s face didn’t change. “Per the Transitive Powers Act,” he told her, “anypony deemed worthy of the title of Prince or Princess by Princess Celestia is assumed to be a responsible party in any unlicensed situation, in this case, as a chaperone. I’m considered perfectly trustworthy around children, so I can take them on their nature walk while you finish your paperwork.”

Twilight still stared at him as the three fillies looked at each other. “Not that that wouldn’t help,” Twilight continued, “but we’ll be walking through the outskirts of the Everfree Forest. While they’re safe now, you still don’t know the area.”

“That’s where you’re wrong,” Blueblood announced with a smile. “I just had to investigate land concerns regarding the Everfree right here in Ponyville. I’ve studied the forest so well I know it like the back of my hoof. Besides, I’ve never let my old scouting skills rust away, so I’ll even be able to teach them.”

Blueblood stayed silent as he felt Twilight stare into his eyes. As her frown deepened, Blueblood’s smile faded away. Finally she shook her head with a small groan, then turned to the fillies. “Is that alright with you?” she asked.

The three fillies looked back at Blueblood, who waved to them with a small smile, then turned back to Twilight. “You know him?” the orange one asked.

“Yeah,” Twilight said.

“My name’s Blackthorn,” Blueblood interrupted. “I-“

He stopped when Twilight glared at him. “I’m sorry,” he said as his cheeks colored. “Carry on.”

Twilight turned back to the fillies. “Well,” she continued, “Blackthorn is a prince of Equestria.”

The fillies’ jaws collectively dropped open. “Ye’r kidding,” the yellow one mused.

“I’m not kidding, Apple Bloom,” Twilight replied. “He’s the director of Internal Affairs. Basically, he makes sure the government runs like it’s supposed to.”

“And you actually know him?” the orange filly asked.

“Yes, Scootaloo,” Twilight answered. “We were actually in Starflight together when we were kids, and he was really good.”

“I still am,” Blueblood protested. “Master rank tracking, navigation, botany, and zoology. If it moves, I can identify it, catch it, and if necessary, cook it.”

The white one made a face. “No offense,” she said, “but I don’t think we’ll be out there that long.”

“Don’t worry, Sweetie Belle,” Twilight assured her. “He’s going to be finished on time.” She glared at Blueblood as she walked out the door. “Have fun,” she said as she disappeared.

Blueblood looked down at the three fillies in his charge. “So, are we ready?” He noticed something on the orange one’s face. “Scootaloo, was it? Is something wrong?”

Scootaloo frowned. “Well…” she said, “and don’t take this the wrong way, but you don’t seem like the wilderness type.”

Blueblood smiled. “I get that a lot,” he said. “Give me a chance and I’m pretty sure I’ll prove myself.”

<*>

“And if you poke here…”

One gentle magical tendril later, and the glowing green bug shot out a burst of magic, deflating like a balloon. The three fillies stared at the display of bright green wisps as they hung in the air. “Ooooh,” they murmured.

Smirking, Blueblood let the bug go. “I trust that puts concerns about my credentials to rest,” he remarked.

Scootaloo blushed. “Yeah, I guess it does.”

Blueblood smiled, then he saw something moving out of the corner of his eye. It looked like a tangle of vines. Every few seconds, though, it seemed to breathe. “And that should be a wumbling briar,” he whispered. “Watch this.”

Blueblood stretched out a leg and tapped on the tree beside him. Easily his magic caught the fruit that fell from the tree and flung it onto the briar. As soon as the fruit made contact, a vine untangled itself and caught the fruit. It was quickly pulled inwards, disappearing from sight. As soon as the fruit was gone, the bush pushed off with its ‘foot’ vines and rolled off further into the woods.

The three oohed. “That is so coooool,” Scootaloo gushed.

Blueblood’s smile widened. “It’s actually closely related to the squid,” he explained. “Those so-called vines are actually tentacles. The thorns are actually dexterous enough to latch onto wood and let it climb trees.” Then a roll of thunder sounded above them. “Well, looks like we should head back some time soon,” Blueblood said.

Sweetie Belle noticed the way his face fell. “Are you alright?” she asked. “You don’t look too happy to be leaving.”

Blueblood shook his head. “It’s just been a while since I’ve been out of my office,” he told her. “It used to be that I got the chance to actually go camping every once in a while. Now, the best I can get is a ‘research’ session with my aunt Celestia’s favorite divan.”

“It’s a type of couch,” Sweetie Belle told Scootaloo.

Scootaloo scowled. “I knew that one,” she huffed.

“So, yew really like camping?” Apple Bloom interrupted. “Yew were even a part of Starlight?”

Blueblood nodded, a small smile forming on his lips. “I was,” he said. “Troop 37. In fact, I got my cutie mark on a hike. That day, I was in charge of several kids, and I was teaching them about whirling wrens. They were about as invested as you were.”

Then he frowned at the open air. “Then, however, Sugar and Spice, the two new girls, came running by, followed by a swarm of Fire Wasps. They’re an endangered species, thankfully, but the few there are can prove deadly. Thankfully, me, Twilight, and a bunch of the other scouts managed to hold them at bay until the scoutmaster got back and sent the wasps off.” Blueblood’s teeth gritted. “Then, about midway through me reading the two the riot act, Twilight noticed that I’d suddenly sprouted a cutie mark.”

Closing his eyes, Blueblood sighed through his nose. “So what’re yew doin’ in a desk job?” Apple Bloom asked. “Shouldn’t ya’ be, like, a lion tamer or somethin’?”

“That never appealed to me,” Blueblood told her. “Besides, there was really only one way I could go.” Slowly, he shrugged. “I guess I should be thankful for that, burnout aside. I can follow my destiny.”

Suddenly, Scootaloo cleared her throat. “Blackthorn,” she said, “I think I lost my… canteen back in the woods.”

Blueblood turned to look at her. “You did?” he asked. “Why didn’t you-“

“I just noticed,” Scootaloo told him. “I thought my pack felt a little light a while ago, but I thought I was just imagining things.

Apple Bloom was already scowling, but at that point she rolled her eyes. “Scootaloo, yew are such a dodo.”

Scootaloo’s eyes narrowed. “Oh yeah?” she asked. “Where’s your bow?”

Apple Bloom’s hoof rushed to the top of her head, and her mouth dropped open. “…ye’r right, it’s gone!” she gasped. Then her face fell. “Ooh,” she moaned. “An’ that bow was so important to me. My ma made it for me before she…” Apple Bloom sniffled. “B-before she…”

As soon as tears started to gush out of Apple Bloom’s eyes, Blueblood rushed forward. “It’s alright,” he said as Apple Bloom started rubbing at her eyes, sobbing profusely. “It’s OK. You stay here with the other three, I’ll go find your bow.”

Apple Bloom looked up at Blueblood, her eyes red and puffy. A few sniffles later, she’d wrapped herself around his neck. “Th-thank you,” she blubbered out. “It’s just-“

“I understand,” Blueblood said. Then he pulled her off of him. “If it starts raining, leave. I’ll be fine, and I’ll be coming back with your bow. I promise that on my aunts themselves.” He motioned for Sweetie Belle to come closer. As soon as she’d gotten close enough for Apple Bloom to latch on, he turned and dashed off into the underbrush.

“Oooookay, he’s gone.”

Apple Bloom instantly detatched herself and glared at Scootaloo. “Great improvisin’, dodo.” She then stomped over to a nearby bush and fished out her now-bent hair decoration. “Y’know Ah’m almost outta’ bows fer this month?”

“Good crying,” Sweetie Belle said. “Did you learn that from my sister?”

“Threw in a few things,” Apple Bloom added as she pinned her bow back in place.

“OK, girls,” Scootaloo interrupted, “time to find a Fire Wasp.”

Sweetie Belle did a double take. “What? But aren’t those really dangerous?”

“What part of the Everfree isn’t?” Scootaloo answered, shaking her head. “Besides, it’s totally worth it. You see how miserable Blackthorn is, we can’t just leave him dead inside like that! Anyways, once we get the one little wasp mad, we run back through, tell Blackthorn we found it going back, then he deals with it. In the process, he realizes what his true calling is meant to be, so he can quit his job and go be happy!”

As the plan was further described, Apple Bloom’s eyes narrowed. “Have you been snoopin’ through mah sister’s book?” she asked.

Scootaloo scoffed. “Ew. No. Now come on, let’s get going.” She swiftly set off into the forest, Apple Bloom right behind her. After a few seconds, though, she stopped and turned back. “You coming, Sweetie Belle?”

Sweetie Belle shook herself out of her daze. “Does Blackthorn seem a little weird to you?” she asked. “’cause I remember Rarity was with a prince at the gala and it wasn’t Blackthorn.”

“Maybe it was just a prince from somewhere else,” Apple Bloom suggested. “Now let’s get movin’.”

The three sped off, Sweetie Belle still frowning in thought.

<<*>>

After twenty minutes, Blueblood was growing concerned. The stormclouds were only darkening, and he could hear thunder in the distance. Despite his best efforts, he couldn’t find either the canteen or the bow, and much as he wanted to, he couldn’t stay behind any longer. Thus, he lifted his head and set out along the path. He’d get back ahead of schedule, but his heart sank. Poor Apple Bloom.

“HEEEELP!”

Blueblood’s ears perked up. That was Apple Bloom, her shriek piercing through the brush. Instantly, he pounded off the path. He magically blasted through anything he could, only dodging around what his magic couldn’t destroy. The sound was coming from off the path, and Blueblood’s face paled as he stepped up the pace. Finally, he crashed through the last brush. “What is i…”

The three fillies were pounding up the path towards Blueblood. Right behind them was something that made Blueblood stop in his tracks: a veritable fog of bright red wasps, surrounded on all sides by smoldering terrain. Fire wasps. As they flew, they shot blue plasma from their stingers. It fizzled out after a short distance, but they flew quickly, and were gaining on the three. “BLUEBLOOD, HELP!” Sweetie Belle shouted. Before Blueblood could stop her, Sweetie Belle shot a faint blast of magic at the wasps. It touched a few of them, but those wasps flashed and suddenly doubled.

“Give me your canteens!” Blueblood shouted. Instantly, three saddlebags slid off and dropped at Blueblood’s hooves, their owners hiding behind Blueblood. In a flash, he opened the bags and out floated three canteens. He cracked them open, revealing a good deal of water still inside. With his magic, he made it flow upwards and in front of him, stretching into a barrier. Then, he started to fire small drops forward like sling bullets.

Most of the drops missed, and some were shot down by fire shot. The ones that hit their marks, though, caused the insects to burst into tiny fireworks, quickly fizzling out. However, the supply of ammunition quickly dwindled away. As the large glob of water was reduced to a trickle, the wasps advanced.

“What do we do now?” Sweetie Belle asked.

Blueblood quickly cast his eyes around. “Try looping around!” he told them. “I’ll hold them off!” The water was almost reduced to mist, and the wasps were within literal spitting distance. Blueblood kept searching, desperate for another source of water. He could pull droplets out of the tree, but that wouldn’t produce enough to be worth it. Trying to condense humidity would be equally pointless.

Then Blueblood looked up. After a moment of thought, he shot a bolt of magic upwards.

The water he had dropped into the dirt. Instantly, the wasps swarmed forward, blue plasma spurting at the four ponies. Then, however, the patch of cloud up above unleashed all of its water at once. The deluge caught many of them. When the wasps tried going around, Blueblood sent the falling water off to the sides, catching and destroying them. Eventually, the swarm turned around and buzzed off into the brush.

For several long moments, the three fillies and Blueblood sucked in breath. None of them said anything; they just focused on breathing and regulating their pulses. Finally, the three looked up at Blueblood. “Thank you,” Scootaloo breathed.

Blueblood slowly turned around. The three felt the desperate urge to recoil as they saw his cold, evil eye, but barely stayed put. “Please,” Blueblood icily hissed. “You’ll want them back in a moment.”

<*>

By coincidence, Twilight Sparkle and her employees were arriving at the castle right as Blueblood and his charges were. Applejack, Rarity, and Rainbow Dash scowled as they saw the Cutie Mark Crusaders plodding behind and Twilight frowned at Blueblood’s glowering. “Good evening, Prince Blackthorn,” she ventured. “I have ju-“

“Hang the pleasantries,” Blueblood growled. “They know who I am.”

Rainbow Dash flew in closer. “What did you do?” she spat at Blueblood.

Blueblood returned her death glare in equal force. “I did nothing.” Then he turned to the fillies. “Maybe you three would like to explain?”

The six mares turned to the three fillies, who started to sweat. Apple Bloom swallowed. “W-well,” she stammered, “Prince Blueblood here was takin’ us on a nature walk, an’ we were enjoyin’ ourse-“

“Cut to the chase,” Blueblood snapped.

“We ticked off a swarm of fire wasps,” Scootaloo blurted out.

Six grown mares gasped. “Celestia’s teeth!” Applejack barked. Before the three fillies could say anything, Applejack, Rainbow Dash, and Rarity rushed forward.

“Are you alright?” Rarity asked her sister.

Sweetie Belle nodded. “Yeah. We’ll be fine.”

“I doubt that,” Blueblood growled. “These three are probably going to be spending the next three months in juvenile hall.”

“WHAT?”

“These three fillies,” he indicated them, “are guilty of harassing an endangered species. And given the past cases of reckless endangerment they’ve informed me of on the way back-”

Twilight glared at Blueblood. “Blueblood, that’s enough,” she growled. “Apple Bloom, Sweetie Belle, and Scootaloo haven’t been convicted of anything. They haven’t even been charged by anypony.”

Blueblood’s eyes widened. “What?!”

“I am talking!” Twilight snapped. “The Transitive Powers Act does not allow you to serve as any kind of police officer or judicial authority. As for their crime, I absolve them as Princess. They almost died, that should be enough punishment for them.”

Blueblood’s nostrils flared and his face reddened as his breaths began to hiss through his teeth. He glared at Twilight, his eyes widening, but Twilight’s face remained steady. Finally, he whipped his head away and yowled to the heavens. This caused the fillies and Fluttershy to flinch, but everyone else just watched him scream. Finally, his lungs ran out of air and he fell to the ground, just as it started to rain.

After a few moments of silence, everypony else walked past him. Twilight dropped his papers right next to him. Rainbow Dash, Rarity, and Applejack scowled at him. And Apple Bloom, Sweetie Belle, and Scootaloo just stared at him for a moment before following their sisters.

<*>

Blueblood stretched a cramp out of his back. Despite his venting of frustrations, he’d found himself even more keyed up than he was before venting. One long night of lying in bed staring at the ceiling had helped him calm down, but he still dragged his hooves back to the train station. The papers were labeled and notarized by him and carefully tucked into his saddlebags; Blueblood had checked at the station. With that done, he just sat and waited.

“YER HIGHNESS!”

Blueblood’s stony scowl deepened as he heard the sound of little hoofbeats storming up to the station. “What’re you doing here?” he growled to the three fillies.

The three of them stopped right in front of him. “We’re really sorry about yesterday,” Sweetie Belle said.

“So you’ve been telling me,” Blueblood rumbled.

“We didn’t mean for everything to go wrong,” Scootaloo interjected. “We just wanted to help you.”

If Blueblood had talons, they would’ve clenched as he took a deep breath. For several seconds, he forced his lips shut. “Well, thank you,” he hissed. “You did wonderfully.”

Sweetie Belle looked at the other two fillies, but Apple Bloom and Scootaloo shook their heads at her. “We just wanted to know,” Sweetie Belle told Blueblood, “why aren’t you a nature guide instead of a G-pony?”

Blueblood turned to stare at Sweetie Belle, who pinkened a little. Regardless, he sighed. “I don’t belong there,” he murmured.

“Are you kidding?” Scootaloo snapped. “Up until we messed with the fire wasps, that was the most fun I’ve had learning anything that wasn’t from Miss Cheerilee! And don’t tell me you weren’t having a blast, too, your highness. You’d be a great teacher.”

”I can’t be a teacher!”

Blueblood looked back at the three. When he saw they were paying attention, he opened his mouth again. “I was born into royalty,” he said. “Blueblood, 23rd Earl of Derby. However, that hereditary title means that I have responsibilities. I can’t become a teacher, I was born to be something more. I was born to be a leader.”

“Yew don’t seem t’ like it.”

Blueblood glared at Apple Bloom. “That’s just burnout. Every job has times when you hate the work, that doesn’t mean I should quit.”

“But do ya’ actually enjoy it?”

Blueblood started to speak, Apple Bloom held up a hoof. “Now, Ah know yew don’t like us,” she said, “an’ Ah don’ blame ya’, but bear with me. Ah told ya’ about how we rebuilt our old clubhouse? Well, last Thanksgiving, somepony noticed that Ah could make really good houses, and suggested that I could help build houses for poor ponies. Ah’d always liked building stuff, so I said ‘sure’ and I started volunteering; fetchin’ nails and delivering messages, things like that.”

Apple Bloom shrugged slightly. “At first, Ah loved doing what Ah was doin’. Ah was givin’ ponies homes, after all. However, as the weeks went by, Ah realized that, while building stuff was fun, doin’ it like work all th’ time an’ not havin’ any control over what Ah was building was suckin’ the joy out of it. Ah like workin’ on houses, but Ah didn’t want t’ jus’ be doin’ busy work. So, Ah quit. Ah didn’t want t’ be selfish, but Ah couldn’ force mahself t’ do somethin’ that drained me every day.”

Blueblood’s lips pursed together. He waited a few moments to say something, but nothing especially apropos came to mind. “It’s like that with me and my scooter,” Scootaloo said. “Rainbow Dash might be up for being an athlete, but getting up early to exercise isn’t really my thing. It’s fun, but it’s not worth the extra work to make it a job.”

A few moments creeped by, but Blueblood couldn’t think of anything to say. So he just sat, frowning, eyes shifting from one filly to the other. Then Sweetie Belle cleared her throat. “Your highness,” she squeaked, “have you ever thought about abdicating?”

Blueblood’s eyes narrowed and Sweetie Belle closed her mouth. Eventually, though, he sighed. “Several times,” he replied. “But still, I was born into-“

“Oh, stop trying to be what everyone else wants!” Scootaloo blurted out. As Blueblood opened his mouth, she continued. “Yes, you’re royalty! Born to be some bigwig! You’re also so miserable that you can’t even do your job! Don’t look at me like that!” Just the same, Scootaloo put her hoof over her eyes. “If you’d been focused, wouldn’t you have found out about that insurance issue before now? Or tracked down Twilight’s library money?”

Blueblood scowled at her, but his lips strained to tilt downwards. He looked the slightest bit away, staring off into the distance. For a long time, he said nothing. Finally, though, he grunted. “Maybe,” he muttered. He snorted. “Why am I talking to you about this?”

Sweetie Belle walked forward. “Because you’ve been keeping it in for a long time and you need somepony to talk to?” she asked him.

Blueblood didn’t even bother to frown, merely deflating. “Maybe.” He looked at the three fillies, face devoid of any sort of energy. “No offense, but you’re still just fillies. I need to talk to an adult about this.”

Apple Bloom frowned. “Jus’ consider it, OK?” she asked him. “Ye’r really cool an’ we’d hate t’ see ya’ crash and burn.”

Softly, Blueblood nodded. Then the train whistle sounded. “I’ll consider it,” he said. “And…” He paused for a moment. “…thank you. For coming to talk to me.”

“Thank you for saving our lives,” Scootaloo told him.

With that, Blueblood turned around and walked to the train. Try as he might, he kept thinking of abdicating, and as he sat down, he picked a seat where he could wave good-bye to the three fillies. For several minutes, he turned the question over in his mind. Then he decided to lean back in his seat and doze off.

(secret) and Blueblood in Context

Cadance stirred in the darkness. The ground was hard beneath her, and she hurt all over. She tried to search her memories, but everything was still fuzzy. She tried to force herself onto her hooves, but her hooves wouldn't support her. So instead, she lay there, able to do little but breathe.

"Hello?"

Cadance immediately perked up. She tried to light up the area around her, but she could barely concentrate on her magic. "Blueblood?" she called out. "Blueblood?"

"Cadance?" the voice groaned from the left. "Cadance, is that you?"

Cadance shoved herself over. "BLUEBLOOD!" Finally, light sprang from her horn. She saw him: sprawled out, scraped up, and still hazy. "Blueblood!" Cadance pulled herself across the ground towards him. Blueblood didn't move, and was covered in blood, though Cadance was glad to see that he didn't seem to have anything broken. Finally, she managed to reach him. "Are you OK?" she asked.

Blueblood forced his head up, but Cadance gently pushed it back down. "Careful," she said. "I couldn't get up at first either."

"I'm confused," Blueblood said. "I remember us being attacked on the way to your bachelorette party, but after that... where are we?"

Carefully, Cadance looked around. It looked like a cave, walls dotted with rock spines. Cadance couldn't see anything pony-made, and she'd never gone underground. "I don't know," she told Blueblood. "It looks like we're underground."

"That's obvious."

Cadance glared at Blueblood. "OK, you tell us where we are!" she snapped.

Looking away from Cadance, Blueblood sat up. "I'm sorry," he said. "I'm just-"

"Scared? So am I." Cadance's face softened a little. "We're going to get out of here," she assured him. "Just don't be an idiot and we'll be fine."

She used her light to check him over. Barring a few scrapes and a swelling on the back of his head, he seemed fine. Feeling a little more presence in her limbs, Cadance got up and started to stumble around. She stayed close. The caverns around her stretched on for what could've been miles; exploring them could be fatal. "I don't suppose your company did anything in this cave, did they?" she asked.

Nothing. Even after giving him a few moments to remember, Blueblood had said nothing. When the silence stretched on longer, Cadance finally had to turn around. To her surprise, Blueblood seemed to have lost focus, staring at something off in the distance. Cadance shined her light in his face. "Blueblood?"

He turned to face her. "There's something I have to tell you," he mumbled.

"If it's about all those times you called me an orphan, it can wait."

Wearily, Blueblood shook his head. "No, it's not that, but I'm sorry for that, too." He took in a deep breath, then another, then one more deep one. "... I-"

A wall in a nearby crystal opened and Cadance stumbled over as quick as she could. Striding forward were two black ponies, but not. They looked like beetles given equine form: black, hard, and glossy. Their eyes were glowing blue, their legs dotted with holes going straight through to the other side, and draping out of their mouths were long, pointed fangs. One raised a hoof and pointed to Blueblood.

"Come with us."

<***>

Chrysalis sat with her elbow on the table. Her eyes were half-lidded as she looked around the room, and her eyebrows were starting to pull downwards as well. The various fruits and vegetables on the table looked delicious, at least from her perspective. The room had been well-decorated to look normal: pleasantly lit, and jasmine candles were burning softly in out-of-the-way places. The only problem was that the man of the hour was several minutes delayed. As the clock ticked on

Finally, a changeling skittered in. At least his armor was cracked a little around what looked like a hoof print. "B-beg pa-"

"Just show him in," she hissed. As soon as the drone slipped out, she sat up straight in her chair, her elbows at her sides, and she smiled. "Please, come in," she beckoned, her voice soft and soothing.

Clop. Clop. Clop. Clop. After a few long seconds, in plodded Blueblood. He was well-bandaged, and he limped a little, but she didn't seen any new bruises, so her servants were off the hook. As soon as he entered and saw Chrysalis, he scowled at her. "Of course," he huffed. "Cockroach ponies, cockroach queen. Makes perfect sense."

Chrysalis bowed her head a little, just enough to acknowledge him. "You must be the Prince," she said. She spread her hooves. "Please, sit and eat. I know it isn't much, but my servants tried so very hard."

Blueblood's gaze did not turn from Chrysalis as he limped forward and flopped down into his seat. He took a brief look down at the meager banquet, then sniffed and turned his nose away, glaring back at Chrysalis. "What are you doing?" he asked. "I know who you are, Queen Chrysalis. I also know that you've violated the Treaty of Canterlot and that there's not one loving, charitable, or in any sense amicable bone in your body. This is probably a bribe, if it hasn't been..." He looked down at it, then took a deep sniff of it. "...poisoned in some way."

Chrysalis's smile faded from her face. "Oh, your highness," she moaned, "you shouldn't believe all of what you hear. I've been-"

"Nice try," Blueblood growled. "Despite popular scuttlebutt, I trust my aunt Celestia too much for that 'history maligned me' garbage to work. So if you'll just get out and let me and everyone else you've kidnapped go, we'll pretend this never happened."

Sadly, Chrysalis shook her head. "I cannot sway you?" she asked. She turned away from Blueblood with a sniff. "Very well, go on your way."

Blueblood stood. "Thank you." Quick as a whip, he turned and started to storm off.

"However..." Chrysalis said. Instantly, Blueblood stopped and slowly turned around. "Blueblood, that name rings a bell. In fact, I believe my drones found some ponies recently who mentioned that name. They were badly burned, and covered in magic which neither I nor my subjects have ever seen the like of. They, too, seemed to be quite close to Canterlot."

Chrysalis turned. Blueblood had gone stiff, much as he tried to mask it in his scowl. "Now, this magic caused several of my drones to become sick," she continued, a scowl of her own developing. "One of them might not recover. Now, regardless of where they are, any leader would be a fool not to ignore a potential weapon being developed for use against them. Now tell me, your highness, what do you know of this? I have places to be, so I suggest you talk quickly."

Nothing was said. Blueblood glared at Chrysalis, but his face was almost frozen. His mouth had opened slightly, but no sound came out of it. For quite some time, the two glared at each other. Finally, Blueblood's teeth gritted together and he hissed to his host "Go ask Cronus." Then he spun on his hindlegs and stormed out the door.

<***>

Blueblood said nothing as he sped through the black, porous corridor. Between the stomping of his good hooves and the hissing from his nostrils, however, he didn't need to. Anyone else who encountered him quickly moved to the side. Thus, Blueblood moved past quite a few corridor intersections before he finally pulled to a halt in the middle of one.

Blueblood's head fell to between his knees, his eyes closed. He tried to force his lungs into a deep, regular pattern as sweat trickled down from his brow. "One, seven, thirteen, nineteen, twenty-three..." His heart started to pound again as he stalled. His teeth gritted together and his breaths started to hiss from his nostrils. "...seventy-nine-"

Then someone plowed into him, knocking him over. "I'm so sorry! I-"

In an instant, Blueblood sprung up and pinned the changeling against a nearby wall. "STAY AWAY FROM ME!" he screamed.

Under his hooves, the drone blanched, freezing in place. "Uh, I, I-I-I-"

The changeling's stuttering turned into gasps as Blueblood's hooves pressed into his chest. Blueblood's lips curled up off of his teeth as he glared fire into his target's eyes. The prince remained that way so long that the corners of the drone's vision began to blur. Then, a sudden burst of magic ripped the changeling away, throwing him to the ground. Blueblood growled at the drone, then turned and started to clomp away. After only a few steps, though, he had to stop and breathe again.

After a few moments, though, he noticed something. At first, he couldn't believe it, but then he looked up. The changeling he had thrown aside was crying. Not just crying: shuddering, hooves-to-eyes blubbering. Blueblood's scowl deepened, then he heavily stamped forward. "What are you doing?" he spat.

The insect's eyes suddenly darted to Blueblood. Tears dribbling down his face, the drone hurriedly wiped them away. "I-it's nothing," he said.

"Tell me what you're doing," Blueblood snarled, his muzzle right next to the bug's.

"Y-you don't have to-"

"TALK!"

With a violent flinch, the changeling stumbled and fell backwards. "I couldn't find anything!" he blurted out. "And she, she said if I... if I failed to bring something to eat back, th-th-then she'd eat me!" Fresh tears started to fall down his cheeks. "I hate it here. I-I-I never wanted to be here! I... I..." The changeling moaned, then he turned away, putting his face in his hooves. "I wish I was dead already!"

The drone erupted into another series of sobs, shaking as he did so. Blueblood's scowl faltered for a moment as he saw what he thought was impossible. Then his scowl returned and he jerked his head away. "Liar," he hissed under his breath. Then his frown faded again and his eyes darted back. The changeling was still shaking and sniffling. For a moment, Blueblood stared at the drone. Then he stepped forward.

"I'll talk to her, Mister..."

The changeling was wiping his eyes when he suddenly stopped. "What?" he breathed.

Blueblood's face didn't change from neutral. "Well, Mr. What," he continued, "I assume you mean the evil Queen. I shall convince her not to kill you. After all, I've managed to talk yaks into compromise: Queen Chrysalis shouldn't be a problem."

Mr. What had stopped weeping and was just staring at Blueblood now. "You can't be serious," he mumbled.

In response, Blueblood just smirked. "Watch me," he said. Then he started to trot off.

<***>

"Now, even if you don't believe me, I have the right to investigate any potential threats..."

Chrysalis stopped herself mid-growl. She was still seated at the table, scowling at nothing. "No, that's too confrontational," she told herself. Instantly, her face fell. "I know you don't believe me," she said, her voice low and soft. "And I understand that. But I have the right to defe-" Scowling, she shook her head. "Not a chance in Tartarus he'd believe that." She cleared her throat.

"I thought the truth was naked."

Chrysalis looked up as Blueblood walked in, impassively taking his seat back at the table. "That's why so many people turn it away," Chrysalis replied. "It isn't dressed properly."

Blueblood put his hooves together. "So, how would you dress the fact that your worker drones are killed for mere acts of ineptitude? That's hardly justifiable."

Chrysalis frowned. "When you're reduced to scraping out a living in the desert, you don't have resources to waste on those who continuously cannot perform their tasks. You can agree that, however justified, they would be... unwelcome and untrusted outside of the hive. I let a group separate and try to live their own life; they were quickly lynched. The only drones who would leave now are too stupid to keep."

Blueblood's mouth dropped open to answer that question, but all he produced was a grunt before he turned his head away. After a few moments, though, he turned it back. "Suppose I could get you to change your mind," he said. "That treating your workers with dignity and respect is good business."

Chrysalis glared down her nose at him. "I'm over one thousand years old," she said. "If you think you know more about my drones than I do, then you are incredibly naive."

"Ponies have been around for five thousand years," Blueblood instantly rebutted, "and we're only just now using fair and efficient means of living. Give my way a try, and I promise you the benefits will reap themselves."

Slowly, Chrysalis's lips pinched together. "And if I'm not convinced?" she asked. "What will you give me as compensation? Bearing in mind that there is only one thing you have at the moment that I want."

Blueblood frowned at her. In response, she merely glared back. The two sat, staring at each other over the table, neither one moving so much as a hair. Finally, however, Blueblood turned away.

"If it doesn't work," he said, "I'll tell you everything."

<***>

One week later, Blueblood was trotting down the hallway at a quick clip. He'd walked this hallway before, many many times. And every time he had found nothing of what he wanted. But still he did it. His eyes were dark, slightly glazed, and his coat was dull and a bit tangled. Even now, his eyes darted from place to place, and he was covered in a light film of perspiration.

"Your highness?"

Blueblood stopped as chitinous hooves sounded on the ground. After a deep breath and a forced smile, he turned around. "Mandible," he said. "How goes everything?"

The changeling formerly known as Mr. What was smiling back at him. "Great," he said. "I found a herd of peccaries this morning and my party's just bringing them in. It's not love, but pork's a close second."

Blueblood smiled and nodded. "Bacon," he said, "the one meat no pony can deny." He quickly led him to one side of the corridor. "Have you found the other prisoners?" he whispered.

Mandible's smile faded. "Maybe," he said. "Try finding section 84, level 12. I heard there's something going on there."

Blueblood had to force himself not to hug the drone in public. "It's a start," he said. "Thank you."

A changeling ran up. "Blueblood," he said, "the Queen wishes to speak with you."

Blueblood's smile fell off of his face again. "Wonderful," he spat. "Thank you, Proboscis. I'll be right there."

<***>

Blueblood plopped himself down into the chair at the table. "Well, Princess Carapace," he drawled, "it appears my method is working."

Chrysalis glared at him as several drones brought out bowls of various plants: flowers, vegetables, and fruits, along with plates and cups. As the drone came closer to the table, Chrysalis couldn't help but watch as Blueblood smiled. "Thank you, Chitin," he told the drone, bowing his head. "I'm glad to see you up and about again."

The changeling didn't smile, but as he left the room, he seemed to have an extra spring in his step. Chrysalis instantly, but distinguishedly, took to the food. As soon as the drone left the room, Blueblood's scowl returned, and he touched nothing. "So, you can be professional," she said. "Actually act like a business owner with sense and manners."

Blueblood laid an elbow on the table. "Oh, I'm nothing but professional with my work," he said. "Be it with my company or Aunt Celestia's requests. It's my 'equals' that I have a problem with."

Chrysalis rolled her eyes. "You're making a mistake," she said. "They might be more productive, but you're making them weaker."

Blueblood's eyebrows fell deeper. "Go on," he rumbled. "Tell me how treating your subordinates like slaves is making them stronger. It hasn't gotten rid of their allergy to apples."

Blueblood then casually scooped a golden delicious apple out of the bowl in front of him, placing it on his plate. In response, Chrysalis's glare deepened. "I do not treat them like slaves," she said. "They are flesh of my flesh, an extension of myself. Therefore, I treat them like I treat myself. They know what I know and eat what I eat. If I am any better fed, it is because I am the first among equals and the strongest warrior." As she said this, she spread her wings and laid her hooves on the table, leaving the holes in both visible. "I assure you, I starve as much as they do."

Blueblood's scowl didn't lift one bit. "Impressive," he muttered. "Do you mark all of your drones like that?"

"They mark themselves," Chrysalis deadpannedly replied. "Ponies have hoop earrings, do they not? Am I to assume that they are marked by some authority?"

Blueblood's scowl deepened. "Not all of them."

"Because it's not Equestrian culture." Chrysalis paused for a moment, but when Blueblood didn't reply, she continued. "The marking of hooves is a sign of unity. They pledge to follow me wherever I go, and I pledge to do what will benefit them the most. If they suffer for it, I suffer with them."

Suddenly, Blueblood's lips disappeared as he shot out of his seat. "You think that makes it alright?" he snapped. "You honestly think that just 'having their best intentions at heart' makes you infallible, that you can do whatever you want to them?"

Chrysalis's eyes widened, and she stood. "Your highness?" she asked. "Are you alright? Do you want me to send for-ARGH!"

Blueblood's apple shot across the table like a cannonball, striking Chrysalis in the chest and bursting into pulp. As soon as it struck her, Chrysalis fell forward onto the table, her hooves darting to her chest, scraping at the pulp on her reddening exoskeleton. For a moment, Blueblood watched her writhe and scream in pain. Then, he turned and bolted into the hallway.

Blueblood turned left and pounded down the hallway. While the corridors kept changing, changelings had developed a three-dimensional grid for keeping track of where everything was in the hive, which made it easier to find things. Keeping a count in his head, Blueblood sped onwards, downwards, ducking left or right into corridors or turning almost back around when he couldn't find a straight path. Finally, he came to the coordinates.

They were empty. It was just an open room full of building supplies. Instantly, Blueblood tried to launch an X-ray spell, but it just wouldn't form. He tried running into the room, but he'd run a long way, and his legs were just too sore. He fell forward, landing on his side and sucking breath in and out of his body. After a few moments, he started to count. "One, seven, thirteen..." He stopped for a moment, trying to breathe. "...thirteen..."

"Blueblood! What's going on?"

Instantly, Blueblood rocketed forward, punching a changeling square in the jaw and bowling him onto his back. When his target tried to move, Blueblood smacked him back down, then smacked him again. And again. And again and again and again. "LIAR!" he shouted as his hoof came down. "MONSTER! DIE!"

A blast of green energy threw Blueblood back across the room, pinning him to the wall. Blueblood wriggled and squirmed like a fish out of water, but the magic held him tightly to the wall. Soon, his sore muscles caught up with him, and his struggles lost most of their potency. At this, he was finally dropped to the floor. Blueblood instantly glared up at the drone. Of all things, the changeling wasn't scowling at him; he was staring, eyes wide. He'd taken quite a beating, bleeding in several places and big blue bruises starting to form.

Then Blueblood recognized the drone. It was Mandible, the same Mandible he'd interceded for; the same Mandible that given him this location. He was standing here now. Blueblood glowered, trying to well up enough hatred to hit him again, but he couldn't. If Mandible had lied for the Queen's sake, why was he here now? Did the Queen lie to him, too? Blueblood tried to concentrate, but then he noticed a small teardrop making its way down Mandible's muzzle.

"...I'm sorry. I-"

Blueblood tried to continue, but a sob hitched in his throat. Before he could clear it out, another had popped up. Blueblood's legs lost feeling as he started to sniffle, tears rolling down his eyes. Eventually, the choked sobs burst into full-out weeping, and Blueblood couldn't keep his head up. As he tried to clear his eyes, new tears sprang up to re-cloud his vision, and Blueblood's shaking hoof couldn't wipe them away fast enough or well enough. After a good, long while, Blueblood looked up. Mandible was still there, or at least, something that looked like him.

"It-it was a drill," Blueblood stammered. "It wasn't a weapon, it was a drill. We were trying to start a petroleum mine. M-my foreman warned me... she said I shouldn't take the drill up so high, that the magic running the drill could react badly with the oil." Blueblood sniffed. "But I told her it was safe. I'd heard it was safe. I even stood in the control room to prove it was safe. And then..."

Blueblood had to stop for a moment, forcing the words out through a throat that had suddenly gone silent. "I only survived by ducking behind a bulkhead with another pony. I don't know where she is. The others weren't so lucky. I..." His throat tightened up again. "...I should've died that day. I should have died... but I didn't!"

Then Blueblood burst into a new litany of sobbing and blubbering. He could see nothing, he could hear nothing. All that existed at that moment was his memory of those last few moments, watching the concussive wave plow into other ponies, trying to take count of all the wounded or dead, staggering out to try and find help. All he saw, all he felt, was the past.

Then everything faded away. The corners of his memory faded back into the present as the memory seemed to be pulled out of him. Silent for a moment, Blueblood could only blink and wipe away tears. Finally, the memories were gone, vanished into a black mist that Chrysalis was pulling into her mouth. Blueblood stared at her as she turned her head to the side and blew the mist out of her mouth, where it dissipated. The large spot on her chest was an angry red and criss-crossed with cracks: but when she turned back, her eyebrows were up, her eyes unsquinted, and her mouth was resting in a line.

"Come with me," she said.

<***>

One short walk later, Blueblood was staring at his crew. They were all in a massive room, which had been dressed up with tiled floors, painted walls and shining windows. All of the workers were confined to beds, some heavily bandaged, others sitting up. Nurse ponies walked up and down the aisles tending to them. Blueblood could only guess that these were changelings, and yet they didn't seem to do anything.

"Our spies saw the explosion," Chrysalis explained. "When they got to the drilling site, we found several ponies still clinging to life. After several drones started falling sick, Chitin got the idea to bring the wounded back to the hive for questioning . Unfortunately, with the state they're in, they'll be recovering for quite a while yet. Most of them should recover, though."

One of the ponies on the beds, a brown mare with bandages and a cast, started to stir. As soon as he saw her, Blueblood dashed over to her side. Just then, her eyes fluttered open. Though bleary at first, they started to focus, especially when she drew a bead on Blueblood. "Blueblood?" she asked.

Blueblood noticed a basket of fruit right next to her bed. Quick as he could, he swiped the green apple off the top and took a bite. Sure enough, it tasted like apple. Blueblood chewed the pulp up in his mouth before he quickly spat it onto the mare's neck. "Ugh, eww!" she moaned, raising a hoof to wipe herself off. However, her hide remained brown. "What is going on with-"

She didn't get any further because Blueblood had leapt forward, crushing her with a hug. "I thought I'd lost you!" he sniffled, beaming behind her back.

After a moment of surprised silence, the foreman leaned up and returned the embrace, smiling just as widely as the prince. Then, however, she noticed the Queen. "Uh, Blueblood?" she whispered. "What's going on?"

Blueblood pulled away. "It's alright," he told the mare. "Queen Chrysalis..." For a moment, he turned to her, silent. "... she saved your lives."

"You'll be free to go," Chrysalis said. "I have no interest in feeding you more than I have to, I have no long-standing grudges with any of you, and if your fearless leader finds out that I've killed her subjects, there isn't a force on Earth that would save me from her. Your memories will be modified, so you won't be able to tell your government where we are, but you will otherwise be quite safe."

The foreman turned to Blueblood, but Blueblood had turned his head back to Chrysalis. It wasn't everyone, but it was so much better than nothing. And Queen Chrysalis was willing to let them go. As he stood there, staring, she quickly turned her head back to look at something else. Blueblood quickly looked back at the foreman, but he couldn't stop thinking about Chrysalis.

<***>

"And you don't remember a thing?"

Blueblood shook his head at his aunt Luna's question. "Nothing," he said. "From then to now, it's just one big blank."

Just an hour ago, Blueblood and the missing workers had been found by a royal guard patrol. Now he was seated at the massive breakfast table in Canterlot Castle with his two aunts and Princess Cadence. A large pot of tea lay between the four, along with a small pile of cupcakes. "I don't like this," Luna said. "Memory alteration is never a good sign."

"Well, everyone's being interrogated now," Cadence said. "If there's a problem, Shiny promises he'll get to the bottom of it."

"Besides," Blueblood added, taking a dainty bite of chocolate cake, "it doesn't feel like something bad happened."

"Then where are your memories?" Celestia asked.

Blueblood frowned at her, but then stopped himself and shrugged. "Fair point," he said. For a moment, he sat stirring his tea, thinking. Then he turned to Cadence. "So, how is your boyfriend?"

Cadence's mouth formed a little 'o'. "I guess you haven't heard. Which makes sense, but..." She reached up and moved her mane away from her horn. Sitting there was a simple ring with a single diamond in it. "We just got engaged yesterday."

Blueblood smiled a little. "Congratulations," he said.

Cadence smiled. "Thanks. Look, I know this is short notice, and you're still relaxing, but would you mind helping me plan everything? You do know a bunch of the people here in Canterlot better than me or Shiny."

At that point, the server, a grey earth stallion, came by with a tray to refill everything. He didn't say a word as he replaced the pot, and the three princesses paid him no mind. However, while he was replacing the cupcakes, he turned to Blueblood and gave him a very brief wink.

At that moment, Blueblood's smile widened a little. He turned back to Cadence. "I'd be delighted."

<***>

"So, how many times does Diamond Dust sneeze in a row?"

In a large room of the hive, Blueblood frowned as he paced in front of a small cadre of changelings, most of whom had morphed into pony shape. One of them, a blue mare with white sock hooves, pinched her lips together. "Uh, three in high dust, once for allergies."

Blueblood nodded. "Good." Blueblood turned to the changelings. "Alright, that's everything I know about them. You'll have to figure out the rest on your own, but you should already be good at that. Remember, kissing only. If I find that rule has been broken, I will be extremely unhappy. Are we clear?"

Everyone shouted in unison "YES, YOUR HIGHNESS!"

Curtly, Blueblood nodded. "Good. You're ready."

<***>

"And there's Diamond Dust, she's an excellent jeweler."

Cadance was nodding off in the tearoom, and almost fell face-first into her scrapbook. "Ugh, Blueblood," she growled. "Couldn't we call it off for tonight?"

Blueblood shook his head. "Someone else wants to book her for the next two months. It's now or never."

Cadance, bleary and mussy, nodded, then took a sip of her tea. Carefully, Blueblood kept the little bottle up his sleeve as Cadance's eyes sparked red for a moment. She put the cup back down, then flipped back in the big book, scowling. "I can't believe you made me choose that dress," she snapped. "Nothing else goes with it."

"Actually..."

Cadance growled. "Blueblood, not a word!"

Blueblood then zipped his lips shut. "Alright," he promised.

<***>

Shining Armor pounded down the castle's entrance hall. "Cadance! Are you alright?"

In the middle of five unconscious changelings, Cadance whipped around. "Shining, take a look around you!" she barked. "This is the third attack this week. Does this look alright to you?"

Shining Armor winced. "I'm sorry. My guards are-"

In an instant, Cadance's face fell. "I'm sorry," she moaned. "I know you're trying, but my nerves are shot."

Blueblood stood up from over a changeling's body. "Is there anything else you can try?"

Shining Armor paused, then nodded.

<***>

Blueblood watched through the pounding rain as the shield came down. It was close, but it managed to clear the last wall of the city limits, just touching the old guardtower. Briefly, Blueblood turned around and fired a ball of green light up into the air. Another light from the keep answered him. Then Blueblood ducked down and stomped his hoof twice. "All clear," he announced.

A wooden trapdoor obscured by a bush opened up. Four ponies slipped up one at a time, quickly creeping off one-by-one into the shadows. Finally, a pink alicorn mare in golden jewelery climbed up, a scowl on her face. "This passage is secure," Queen Chrysalis told Blueblood. "We can get through the shield just fine. Well done."

Before she could walk off, Blueblood stepped in front of her. "Queen Chrysalis," he said, "are you sure this is right?"

Chrysalis rolled her eyes. "Now is not the time," she hissed.

"Chrysalis, please. Celestia is a reasonable woman, I'm sure she can-"

Chrysalis moved in close and snorted in Blueblood's face. "Not. Now."

Suddenly taught as a bowstring, Blueblood nodded. "Yes, ma'am," he squeaked.

Chrysalis stormed off for a few feet. Then, however, she stopped and sighed. When she turned around, she had a small, sad frown on her face. "I'm sorry," she said, running a hoof across his face. "You've been so very helpful, Blueblood. Just trust me for five more days."

As soon as she touched him, his tension instantly melted away. "As you wish," he said. "Five more days..." Slowly, he moved in closer, able to smell the lilac of the Queen's breath...

A moment later, Blueblood was waking up in an ambulance on a stretcher, an IV inserted in his arm. Standing over him was a black mare with wings and a horn. "What?" he slurred.

A hoof came down on top of him. "Nephew," Luna said, "you need to relax. We just found you."

Blueblood looked down at himself. The bruises had vanished, but his ribs still hurt. He opened his mouth, then stopped himself. "What's going on?" he asked.

Luna frowned as the ambulance bounced. "It all started at the wedding..."

<***>

"NO!"

Down in the mine, Cadence tried to blast the drones away, but her magic fizzled. The two drones instantly rushed forward and slammed into her, knocking her back to the ground. She tried to stand back up, but when she did, the two drones instantly slapped her back down.

"Cadence, stop!"

The drones turned. With a deep breath, Blueblood put his hooves under him and slowly pushed himself up. Shaking, he turned to the changelings. "I'll go with you peacefully."

Fluidly, the drones moved on either side of him, leaning together to keep him upright. "Blueblood, be careful," Cadence gasped.

Blueblood stared at her for a moment, then he smiled. For a moment, the two stared at each other. Then a flash of green light washed over him, making him grow, turning his fur into black chitin, and forming a green crown on his head.

"Thank you," Chrysalis chuckled.

Another flash turned her into Cadence as she walked away. Cadence tried to stumble to her hooves, but as a wall of rock rose behind the changelings, everything went black, and she remembered no more.

Author's Note

So, the season finale was a thing. Unfortunately, it was a thing that screwed with a plan I'd been stewing over since last Christmas and wanted to time carefully, as I found out when I started writing this. Hopefully it still works. I mean, I think it does. But after this one, Phase III starts up... when it starts up. I have to find a job and all, after all. So, yeah, tell me what you think. After this, the following:

Sunset Shimmer and Blueblood the Colossus.
Twilight Sparkle and Blueblood the Convalescent
Pinkie Pie e Sangueblu il Tempestoso
Luna and Blueblood the Ambitious
Lyra, Bon Bon and Blueblood the Compunctious

Sunset Shimmer and Blueblood the Colossus

"Umm, what's your name... Blueblood?"

A young white colt with a golden mane shook his head as someone poked him, an absent smile on his face straightening out. "Huh?" he asked.

The purple filly leaned back to her own desk, adjusting her rather cheap glasses. She paled a little as Blueblood stared down his nose at her, but she continued. "You were staring off into space. I didn't want you to be surprised by the teacher."

The classroom was peaceful in the moments before class began again. Since the teacher hadn't arrived yet, the foals were free to do almost anything. Some talked, some worked on homework, one ran down to the bathroom, and one had started staring out the window. That is, until the little purple filly, desk calling her Twilight Sparkle, poked him in the back of the head. "What were you thinking about?" she asked.

Blueblood turned back to the window, which was currently being pelted with snowflakes. "You see that snow?" he asked.

Twilight looked up at them. "Yeah?"

Blueblood sat up a little straighter in his chair. "Well, most snowflakes are hexagons, but there are a few that are are triangles. Well, they're hexagons, 'cause they have six sides, but some have three sides that are much longer than the others. Those encounter a mote of dust on the way down, so that one side faces up. Because of that, two other sides face down at an angle, so they absorb a lot more ice crystals. This pinches the sides that they touch, which makes the third side longer as well." Then he turned back to Twilight. "Did you know that?"

Twilight nodded. "Yeah." Then she looked out the window. "There are only about forty different kinds of snowflake: the ones we think of are called plane crystals."

Blueblood frowned at Twilight for a moment, but that vanished as she turned her head forward again. "Cool," he said. "What's your report on?"

Twilight opened up her desk and pulled out a small book and a wooden box. "Crystallography. I've got a string and sugar water: I got my brother to enchant the process to go faster." For a moment, she paused, staring at Blueblood. "W-what about you?"

Blueblood rolled his eyes and groaned as he reached into his own desk. "My father had a suggestion." Blueblood pulled out his own book, as well as a small bag of coins. "Capitalism. I get to tell everyone about 'the invisible hoof'."

Twilight nodded noncommittally. "Well, good lu-"

The bell rang and the teacher walked in on the dot. "Alright, class," the tall blue mare said, "I hope everyone has their projects ready, because we can't afford to stop if we want to get through them today." She looked over at one side of the room, then turned to face the other. "Let's start wiiiiiith..." her eyes drifted around to the windows, "Twilight Sparkle! Come on up!"

Twilight's eyes widened in surprise. Very slowly, she inched herself out of her desk, lifted the box onto her muzzle, and carefully plodded up to the front of the class. Blueblood noticed that once she'd gotten up to the front of the class, she took her sweet time opening the box, removing a paperclip on a string and cup with a lid, and oh so carefully removing the lid from the cup. She finally turned around. After a big gulp and a fidget, she opened her mouth.

"Uhh, hello everypony!" she stammered to the class, a big, fake smile on her face. Nopony answered. "Well, thi- as I..." She stopped to swallow. "Crystals!" she chirped. "Crystals are... are..." Her eyes flashed back to her desk, where she'd left her book. Face falling, she started to sweat. "Crystals are a solid ordered in a- ordered so that the molecules form an ordered lattice."

Blueblood groaned to himself as Twilight turned around to draw on the board. Then he opened his desk a crack and started skimming over his book, practicing his own presentation under his breath. Occasionally, he'd look up.

Finally, Twilight stepped away from the board, showing a cube. "Th-this is a salt crystal," Twilight stuttered out. "A-as you can see, it has..." She paused for a moment, now gasping. "I-it's a cube shape, so other salt molecules would stick on in a cube sha-"

Twilight had started to wander, so at this point she bumped into a table, causing a small fit of giggles. Blueblood rolled his eyes, but when he looked up, he stopped. Twilight looked completely lost, staring a thousand miles away from the other fillies. After a few moments, she started to sniffle, tears springing to the corners of her eyes. Blueblood's mouth dropped open for a moment. Then he shoved himself out of his desk and strode forward.

"Thank you, Twilight," he gently told her as he stood next to her, "I can take it from here." Then he turned to the class. "As my partner here said, other molecules form different kinds of crystals. For example, sugar forms hexagonal crystals."

Blueblood pulled the lid from the cup. He tilted it just enough to reveal a red liquid inside. "This," he continued, "is sugar water. As you can guess, it's water that contains dissolved sugar molecules, as well as some red food coloring. When I insert the string into the cup, the dissolved sugar will cling onto the string and bind into rock candy crystals." Blueblood looked in the box, then he turned to Twilight. After no response, he turned back to the class. "I'd demonstrate for you," he said, "but rock candy takes a week to grow. So-"

"We're going to speed things up," Twilight announced just as Blueblood lifted his hoof. "I got my brother to place a spell on the mixture so that it forms faster. It'll only take a couple of seconds."

In response, Blueblood smiled. Then he turned to the class, motioning to Twilight. "This is why we're partners," he said. "She gets the best ideas." Blueblood could barely hold in a giggle as he saw Twilight's cheeks go red in the corner of his vision. "Alright," he said, "let's begin." With that, he lifted the string in his mouth and roughly dunked it into the water.

For the first few moments, the class couldn't really see anything. Still, Blueblood patiently kept the string in the water. "Th-the forming crystals are very fragile," Twilight explained. "Too much sound, even a lot of hoof traffic can cause the growing crystals to fall off or shatter. "However, once they get bigger..." Twilight motioned to Blueblood, who raised up the string, "...they can withstand a lot more vibration. And in the end, we get-"

Twilight was interrupted by a stifled yelp. The crystals had kept growing, and were now growing over Blueblood's red-stained muzzle. As a few of the kids started to laugh, Blueblood tried to smack off the string of sugar with his hoof. However, the crystal was tough, and it was stuck tight to him. Every attempt to pulverize it just resulted in it tugging painfully at his lips. The crystal moved around his nostils, but hit completely covered his mouth. Eventually, Blueblood reared back.

Then crystal quickly shattered, and any laughter instantly stopped. Sternly, the teacher stalked forward, sparing one glare at the class before turning back to Bluebood. "Are you alright?" she asked.

Slowly, Blueblood nodded.

"I'm guessing that the solution touched your lips," the teacher said. Then she moved in to his ear. "That was very thoughtful of you, Blueblood," she whispered. "Go take your seat."

Pulling on his inner reserves of dignity, Blueblood kept elegant posture as he walked back to his desk, scowling all the way. All the while, though, he could hear Twilight sobbing in front of everyone, even as the teacher tried to comfort her.

<***>

Twenty years later, Blueblood was sitting in a corner of a party he didn't want to be at. He didn't want to go in the first place, but Twilight had specifically told him to come and intimated that refusing wasn't an option. Arriving had not improved his mood. The overly bright pastel colors could only distract from the dark broodiness of Twilight's castle so well, and both together made a complete and total mess. Combined with the very kiddy music and food, it just looked awful.

Thus, he was well away from everypony else and the horribly bright colors, a sullen frown on his face as he sat reading a newspaper. The indicated story had made it all the way to the front page. Two earth ponies, brothers, were side-by-side under the headline "COMMODITY CONSPIRACY: Hoof brothers fined for cornering silver market." He read for a little longer before he turned the pages. The other article started a few pages back, including a picture of a unicorn mare, under which were the words "Former Beau Monde Mining Company CFO charged with Grand Embezzlement."

Blueblood yelped and leapt up as something cold poured over him right before somepony landed on top of him. Suddenly steaming at the ears, he shoved the pony off and whipped around. "What in Tartarus-"

Instantly, the wind came out of his sails as he noticed a scrawny teenage pegasus standing in front of him, a splotch of purple on his tuxedo. He was green, with a purple mane and mouth gaped open. "Oh Celestia!" he squeaked. "It's you!" Instantly he fell to his knees, sweat flying off into the air. "Sir, I am so, so, so, so, so sorry! I got distracted, I bumped into something, I-I-I-I didn't mean to-"

He stopped as Blueblood laid a hoof on the back of his neck. "Just be more careful next time," Blueblood admonished him, voice soft. "Understand?" His lips barely quirked upward into a not-frown as the waiter nodded fervently. "Good. Now go get changed."

As soon as the foal was out of eyeshot, Blueblood's scowl returned and he took off his coat. He had a big purple blotch across all of it: the coat was probably ruined. Blueblood closed his eyes tightly as he put it back on, mentally counting to ten. Once he'd counted down, he trod off, trying not to stomp.

The other guests were already engaged it talking to other ponies, but they still stepped aside whenever they saw him. Some of them sniffed as they turned away, others frowned at him with sad eyes. Everypony who looked at him made Blueblood's blood pressure rise, and he started to stomp in spite of himself. Eventually, he came to the center of the room.

There he saw something he hadn't noticed before. A large blue and black fountain had been set up, enchanted so that it was deeper than it looked. At the bottom were a great deal of coins. Blueblood quickly noticed a large sign right in front, which read 'MAKE A WISH AND SUPPORT PONYVILLE GENERAL'S CHILDREN'S WING'.

Blueblood took another look around the room. Then he noticed that the colors chosen were actually very kiddy colors, now seeming very appropriate. He still glared at them for a moment, but that stopped as he turned back to the fountain. A lot of ponies had already donated, it seemed: the floor was half-covered and little mounds of coins were forming. A slight smile forming on his face, Blueblood closed his eyes as he reached into his coat pocket. "I wish for..."

He couldn't feel his coin purse. Smile fading, he pulled open his coat and visually checked. It was gone. He'd definitely felt it when he pulled out his ticket for the event, so that meant... Blueblood scowled and smacked his forehead. The waiter. He'd probably used the drink as a distraction so that he could pick Blueblood's pockets. Scowl only growing, Blueblood spun his head around, trying to find Twilight.

Then he stopped. For a moment, he stood sadly staring into nothing, silent as the grave. Then he just started walking. He didn't have a destination in mind, he just wanted somewhere to be alone. Thus, he wandered away from the other guests. He wandered out of the massive hall where the event was taking place, but at the carpeted corridor to the exit, he stopped. A sad frown gradually spread over his face. Then he turned his head to the side, looking down the other corridor. No-one was down there.

His brow furled as he looked around: there weren't any guards in sight. For a moment, he paused, staring at the pillars where guards were likely to be posted. Then he shrugged, quietly chalked it up to poor deployment schedule, and sped off down the hallway. As he ran, his hooves clip-clopping on the crystal, he kept his eyes darting back and forth, just in case there actually were guards there. However, no matter how far he ran, he couldn't see any.

Gradually, he came to the end of the decorated portion of the hallway. Here the dark and dreary colors of the castle were in full effect, marinating the hallway in darkness. Blueblood moved onwards. Eventually, he stopped looking around for guards, just meandering through the hallways, hearing his hooves click across the crystal as he peeked into various rooms.

The library was full of people at that moment, but there were still plenty of other places to explore. Twilight's master bedroom, whatever-his-name-wa-Spike's bedroom, the observatory, the throne room (Blueblood spent a few moments drearily pretending to be the Friendship Council). He wandered through all of them, but never stayed more than a minute before trying to move on to the next place. To his mounting disgust, none of the doors were locked, and he had perfect freedom to wander wherever.

Eventually, his wandering through the castle carried him down into the basements. They were just as dark, but also completely spotless. As Blueblood peered into each of the rooms, he could see scientific equipment for a variety of different tests spread out throughout them. His breath snorted out of his nostrils as he rolled his eyes. "Of course," he muttered to himself.

As he walked past one of the doors, though, he stopped and backed up. Inside one of the rooms was a box producing a bright red glow. Blueblood tried to look around in the room, but from outside he could see nothing that could tell him what was inside. There was a pile of notes on the table inside, as well. For a great many moments, Blueblood tried to make out something that would tell him what was causing the glowing. Finally, he tried the door. It was locked. Blueblood spent a moment trying to unlock it, but then drifted to a halt as his memories called.

<***>

Eleven-year-old Twilight frowned as Blueblood stomped into her house. "You're late," she noted.

Blueblood spun his head around to glare at her and she quickly backed down. Then, however, Blueblood's face softened as he sighed. "Dad," he said. "He locked me in my room."

As he walked by her to hang up his coat, Twilight noticed the bald spot on Blueblood's rump. The coat was starting to come in again, she noted, but it'd still be a while before the other foals would stop calling him 'bald-flank'. Not that there was anything to see yet. Not for a while. At least they'd forgotten about what happened to his eyebrows.

Eventually, Blueblood came back to the living room and walked over to the table, dropping a stack of papers on the table. "That's what I could find," he said. "Your brother and his girlfriend out of the way?" he asked.

Twilight nodded. "Yeah," she told him, "in full costume and everything."

Blueblood snorted, but wilted a little as he noticed Twilight's glare. Then he turned back to the table, and his eyes widened at the machine on top of it. "Wow," he muttered.

Sitting on the table was a upside-down trash can lid with the handle removed. Facing up was a set of nine black spots, eight arranged in a circle around the other. All of them were connected by wires wrapped around them. As Blueblood peeked in closer, the spots started to glow light blue. He quickly shied back. Their entry for his famous great-aunt Celestia's academy Qualifiers. If it was picked, another round of testing would ensue before they were judged for entry into Princess Celestia's School for Gifted Unicorns. "Did the twisted pair wires work?" he asked.

Twilight moved forward. "Yeah, and I managed to fix the stabilizers," she said, pointing to the outer dots. "Increasing the length of the wires actually helped the magic decay a little before reaching them."

Blueblood nodded. "Not a bad solution," he noted. "And the coiling would help filter out magical interference even more."

Twilight hmmed in agreement. "The magic feed is still a little sensitive, though."

Gingerly, Blueblood reached forward and shifted the lid with his hoof, revealing a tenth spot on top, connected to the others by another set of wires. "Any ideas?" he asked instead.

Twilight shook her head. "Beyond wrapping the pilot's horn in PVC, which would be a little annoying, I got nothing."

Blueblood's eyes widened for a moment, but then he made them narrow back to normal. "You're sure?" he asked.

"I've been thinking about this since last week," Twilight told him. "And we're almost out of money. I can only do so much."

For several moments, neither of the two said anything. Blueblood looked back at the device, then back to Twilight. With a few more looks back and forth, he finally cleared his throat. "Did you try putting insulation on the feed?"

"That would cut off the magic entirely," Twilight said.

"Just a small layer of foam." Blueblood ducked under the table and picked up a thin bit of insulation foam. "The porous material should let just enough magic through that hiccups won't happen." Blueblood slapped the foam over the sensor. "Just stuck it in-"

"Blueblood!"

The dots on the bottom of the disk flashed bright blue, a stream of light flashing out the bottom. In an instant, it was on the other side of the room. Blueblood was on the floor, one hoof covering his nose and tears streaming down his cheeks. Twilight was instantly at his side. "Are you alright?" she asked.

Blueblood snarled as he opened his mouth. "I'm fine," he snapped. "I ju... uh-oh." Blueblood's eyes widened as he pulled his hoof away. There was a trickle of red running down it. As he felt his face, he could feel another trickle running down to his mouth.

Twilight practically flew to the other side of the room and back, carrying a box of tissues in her mouth. As soon as they were in reach, Blueblood grabbed one in his teeth and shoved it to his face, wincing as he pressed his hooves to his nose. "Anything broken?" Twilight asked him. For a moment, Blueblood just glared into the tissue. Then, however, he shook his head. "Good," she said. Then she turned to the disk. "Well," she noted, "it was moving slower than last time. Just wrap the insulation in duct tape..."

Blueblood just sat there, scowling into space for a moment. Finally, though, he spoke. "Forget it." Blueblood pushed himself up onto three feet, the fourth holding the tissue in place. "Just forget it. I'm out."

As Blueblood limped his way forward, Twilight's eyes widened. "What? Blueblood, no!" She dashed in front of him.

Blueblood glared at her. "Get out of my way, Twilight," he rumbled.

Blueblood tried to duck around her but Twilight stepped in front of him. "B-but Princess Celestia's-"

"Pick something else," he growled. "You've got a month, you can make it work. I, meanwhile," he tried to slip past the filly, "need to work on my presentation."

Twilight's eyes widened as Blueblood sidestepped her, but then she stepped back in front of him. "I'll make the machine," she said. "I'll even fly it. You won't have anything to do with it except be a test subject." She paused for a moment as Blueblood raised an eyebrow at her. "Just give the spiel," she said. "I'll take care of the rest."

Blueblood scowled at Twilight for a moment, but her puppy-dog eyes just stayed focused on him. For a moment, he glared back at her. Then he turned to one side. "I'll talk," he said.

"Thanks."

<*>

The lock was easy enough to break through, which made Blueblood roll his eyes. In just a moment, though, his frown was gone as he stared inside the crate. It was full of bright red eggs, several of which were pulsing with red veins. Blueblood reached out to touch one, but stopped at the warning printed on the crate: "DANGER: EXTREMELY HOT". Blueblood noticed a thermometer on the inside of the box. While the outside was nice and temperate, the inside was about 250 degrees Celsius.

Stepping away from the box, Blueblood spotted a collection of notebooks on a nearby desk. He was on them in an instant, setting them down and pulling all of them open to the first page. Finally, he found the earliest entry and began skimming through the book at lightning speed. Occasionally a word from the text would come out of his mouth, such as 'reptilian', 'Mesozoic', 'homeothermous', or 'brumation', but for the most part, the pages just flipped around at warp speed, letting Blueblood finish the first two notebooks in just under an hour.

"Hey."

The lights came on as Blueblood straightened up and spun in his chair. Standing in the door was a yellow mare with her mane striped in yellow and red. "I didn't know anyone else was down here," she said. "You know there's a party upstairs?"

Blueblood squinted at her. For some reason, he could remember her, but her name was eluding him. She didn't seem annoyed at him, just puzzled, which also confused him. Eventually, he decided to just shrug. "Not much of a party person," he said, turning back to the notes. "Thought I'd get some research done."

He could hear the mare's hooves clopping on the floor as she walked up to him. "This late?" she asked. "I thought the researchers had already clocked off."

Blueblood waved at her. "I wanted to stay late," he said. "These are very interesting. The first specimens of Cherufe that we've ever encountered."

Out of the corner of his eye, Blueblood could see the mare's eyes widen. "Wow, they're here already?" she asked. "They must've just been delivered." She peeked through one of the notebooks. "For so long, I thought they were just myth."

"Well, here they are," Blueblood crowed. "They've been around since the early Triassic period, according to fossil records."

Blueblood heard a pause. "Uh-huh," the mare said. Then he noticed her walking around to peek in the box. "I can't wait to see them hatch."

Blueblood then turned around to look at her. "I thought all of the researchers had gone home," he told her.

At that, the mare frowned at him. It only lasted a moment, though. "I'm not really one of the researchers," she said. "But I am a friend of Princess Twilight Sparkle. She tells me everything the research staff are doing, but this is the first time she's invited me back to help her with testing."

Another feeling of recognition washed over Blueblood, and he couldn't help but frown at the mare. She, in turn, frowned back. "Have we met before?" she asked.

Blueblood quickly shook his head. "I don't think so," he told her. Still, he turned his head back to his current notebook and kept skimming it.

Soon, however he became aware of the mare standing at his side, glaring at him. "I think I have seen you before," she said. "But not as one of the researchers here."

"I'm another old friend of Twilight's. She just wanted to show me something."

The notebook was magically closed in his face. "Hence why you're sitting in here with the lights off?" she asked. "Yeah, you look like a friend of hers." She turned to the door. "GUARD!" she shouted. "We have a-"

Suddenly, the crate exploded, and the two ponies jumped away, instinctively shielding their eyes. When the debris cleared, the two looked back. The crate, and the eggs inside, were gone. In their place were three things that looked like dragons with rock for skin. Their exposed veins glowed orangish-yellow, as did their eyes and mouths. Blueblood was vaguely aware of the temperature spiking all around him, but then the things stared at him. The closest one spawned a glowing rock in its claw, then it leaned back and flung it at him.

In an instant, a bright blue shield formed in front of it, and the rock disintegrated. "RUN FOR THE DOOR!" the mare snapped. Blueblood stared at the creatures for a moment, but the magical shield shoved him, kick-starting his legs. As he ran, he could hear more projectiles shattering against the layer of magic. As soon as he was through the door (with one quick tug flinging him out of the way), the mare slammed the door shut. "OK, that shouldn't have-"

She was cut off by a loud CRACK! A bright flash of orange light, visible through the crystal door, had knocked a piece out of it. In an instant, Sunset had replaced the crystal and sealed the damage. "GUARDS, SHORE THIS DOOR UP!" From out of nowhere Blueblood could see, a cadre of guard ponies appeared with a quick 'yes, Miss Sunset', various colors of magic pouring into the door. "That shouldn't have happened," she repeated. Then she turned to Blueblood. "You, come with me. We have to find Twilight."

Blueblood watched her dash around a corner and down another hallway for ten seconds before she peeked her head back. He hadn't moved an inch. "Hey," she called. "Did you hear me?" She moved closer but Blueblood didn't move. He was lost in another memory.

<*>

"Very nice. Thank you, uh... Lyra."

A yellow mare with red streaks in her mane lowered the clipboard and looked off of the stage into the crowd. Her face was neutral, but it wouldn't take too much of a look to see the lowered ears and slightly narrowed eyes indicative of boredom. "Alright," she continued. "Up next is Moondancer..."

Meanwhile, backstage, Twilight had set up a workbench and was inspecting their exhibit with a checklist longer than she was. Blueblood was standing off to the side, constantly peeking through the gap in the tent. "I don't think he's out there," Twilight said, looking up from her work on the mechanics. "I mean, why would-"

A brief flicker of Twilight's horn caused the disk to softly smack her in the chin, momentarily shutting her up. "He's out there," Blueblood said. "I don't know why, but he's out there."

Twilight turned the disk over, then reached for a soldering iron. "You said he was on a train to Manehattan," she said. "How could he possibly-"

"I don't know!" Blueblood snapped at her, finally spinning around to face her. "I just- ugh!"

Growling, Blueblood stalked over to Twilight's workbench. Twilight finally finished her work with the soldering iron, then put it to the side. Then she made one final check before she pushed her list away. "Well, it looks good from my end," she said. "It should only trigger with magical energy. Do you want to check it?"

Blueblood took a quick look at the device. After only a brief look, though, Blueblood took a quick step backwards. "No," he said. "I'm sure you've triple-checked all of the problems out."

"Alright, thank you Moondancer," the announcer droned. "OK, up next is Twilight Sparkle with a personal flying machine..." She paused for a moment. "...with Blueblood assisting."

Blueblood and Twilight shared one more glance before they both shouldered the device and brought it on stage. As they made their way through the curtain, Blueblood kept scanning the crowd for the face of his father. Once the two got up to center stage, Blueblood was forced to look down and help Twilight lower the device. As soon as he was finished, he looked back into the crowd. No sign of him, so Blueblood started combing over everyone.

Then Twilight nudged him.

Blueblood pushed back, frowning, then took a moment to prepare himself. Finally, he cleared his own throat and began to speak. "Flight," he started. "A long-held dream for two-thirds of the Equestrian population. Due to the complexities involved in reproducing the natural gift of Pegasi..."

As he continued to talk, Blueblood kept visually sweeping the crowd. He paid no attention to how his own face looked, so as he kept sweeping the crowd, he was frowning. Occasionally he stopped speaking and his frown deepened as he noticed an especially pale stallion, but he then moved on, scanning the crowd all during his brief spiel.

Finally, he finished up and slowly backed over to the device. Twilight, meanwhile, put the flying disk flat on the ground. After a few steps, he spun on his back hooves and walked the rest of the way. Gingerly, so very gingerly, he placed a hoof on the device. It didn't move. He carefully put his other hooves onto the circle of metal as well. For half a minute, he shuffled his hooves so that he was perfectly balanced. Finally, he turned to Twilight and nodded. She nodded back, then her horn lit up.

"Blueblood!"

Blueblood's head whipped back around to the crowd. Charging up the aisle was a red-faced unicorn stallion. His fur was white, his mane blond, and his blue eyes focused right on his son on stage. Blueblood opened his mouth, but before he could placate his father, the device started to rise into the air. Almost instantly, Blueblood's father paled, his mouth dropping open as he watched Blueblood rise into the air.

So intently focused on his father was he that Blueblood forgot what he was doing. At three feet, though, the disk stopping and moving forwards cleared his mind. He took a deep breath and tried to relax. He didn't move his hooves at all. All he did was stand on the flying disk and stay very still as it started to move around. All the while his heart was hammering, but he tried to be smooth as he looked from his father to the device and back.

Eventually, his muscles started to relax. The disk was moving slowly and gracefully, exactly like it was supposed to. Blueblood looked down at Twilight. She was completely calm, breathing deeply, eyes focused on the device she was directing with her own magic. Then he turned to his father. His father had walked over to the announcer, but he had stopped right in front of her. Instead, he was just staring up at Blueblood again. A moment later, Blueblood flashed him a small smile.

Then a blast of magic flashed under the disk. Blueblood froze for a moment, just enough time for the device to shoot skyward. In a fraction of a second, one of the other thrusters sent the disk into a wild spiral around the fair. Blueblood clamped onto the device, too panicked to be thankful for the lack of heat. His whole world was a whirl of colors and screaming. The last thing he noticed before blacking out was a massive statue.

<***>

Very unsteadily, Blueblood came to. As he opened his eyes, he had to force his head to stay still, and his hooves and eyes took a few seconds to steady themselves before he could use them. As soon as they were remotely steady, he got up and looked around. Blueblood noticed he'd landed behind the cotton candy tent. The flying disk was gone; probably lost.

"Blueblood!"

Quick as a whip, Twilight sprinted up to him. "Are you OK? Anything broken?"

Blueblood stared at Twilight for a moment, but then stretched himself out. "No," he said. "I think I'm fine." He then started looking himself over.

Twilight let out her breath. "Thank Celestia." She looked up at the sky. "What do you think happened?"

Blueblood frowned. "I don't know," he said. "I... I didn't do anything."

Blueblood fell silent for a moment, staring at his flank. It wasn't blank anymore. Now there was a cutie mark there. It looked like the crest of his family, but something was wrong with it. Instead of being purple on silver, it was gold on silver. Metal on metal, a violation of basic heraldic rule. And a riddle to wit.

He quickly replayed the events of the ride in his head. He'd stayed completely still, he hadn't touched any of the disk's wiring. He shouldn't have had any effect on the device at all. But he couldn't shake the feeling that he had. A deep pit opened up in his heart and he could feel the start of tears welling up in his eyes.

"You think I missed something?"

When Twilight said that, Blueblood's sad frown turned into a scowl. "After triple-checking everything?" he asked her, his voice low and harsh as he moved closer. "No, you don't miss anything."

"Then what do you think happe-" Twilight cut off as Blueblood stalked towards her. "Blueblood? You don't think-"

"Well, I didn't do anything," Blueblood snapped. "And there's no way you could've missed anything. That just means this had to have happened on purpose."

Twilight's jaw dropped open as she backed away. "Bluebloo-"

"Don't" Blueblood growled. "I was your little pet loser all along, wasn't I? So what if you're a pathetic little nerd who can't speak without blubbering over yourself? So what if everyone thinks you're a weird little loner? At least you could laugh at Blueblood the Clumsy!" Now he was shouting at Twilight. "Is that why you made the disk crash? So you could look good in front of everyone else?"

For several moments, Twilight stood there, her lip quivering as tears filled her eyes. Finally, she let out a small whimper, spun around, and sped away, crying as she went. "GET BACK HERE!" Blueblood shouted. "DON'T YOU-"

Blueblood's hoof got caught in a gopher hole and he pitched forward, rolling onto his rear. As soon as he regained his bearings, he tried to stand. A flash of pain in one fetlock sent him sprawling to the ground again. He glared up again. Twilight had vanished. Unable to see her, he bellowed out all of his rage in the last direction he'd seen her.

"TWILIGHT! KEEP RUNNING, TWILIGHT! IF I EVER SEE YOU AGAIN, I'LL..."

Blueblood's rage bubbled out of him. For several moments, all he could do was breathe, the scowl on his face slipping. Blueblood's memories had woken, and were now playing before him. He could see his experiment with an electrically warmed coat: a heating element catching fire in front of the whole school while he was still wearing it. An experiment with an adhesive coatrack that had taken his eyebrows with it. Mechanical attachments to legs that could improve bucking strength which only resulted in him getting a long, nasty cut down his thigh. Through all those and more, Twilight had been uninvolved. His problems had been his alone.

Just like now.

Blueblood's eyes quickly scanned over the area, but Twilight was gone. "TWILIGHT?" he called. "TWILIGHT?" No response. Blueblood opened his mouth to try again, but his breath hitched. He tried again as his vision clouded, and again as his strength left him, but all that came out was a choked sob if anything. Finally, he couldn't even try. He just fell forward, tears streaming down his face, snot coming out of his nose, and inelegant blubbering forcing its way out of his mouth.

"Blueblood!"

After a long sixty seconds, by which time he'd stopped verbally sobbing, Blueblood could hear hoofbeats slamming up to him, then he could make out two blurs: one white and one yellow. "Blueblood, are you alright?" a deep voice asked, sounding hurried and soft.

Blueblood sniffled again as he recognized the voice. As his voice came out, it was wavery and choked. "Da...Father, I-"

In response, a hoof put itself under his chin. "Is anything broken?" his father asked. "Any cuts?"

Sniffling, Blueblood shook his head before stopping himself. Then, slowly, he raised his hoof up and out.

The yellow pony took a quick look at it. "I'll go get some ice for that."

Blueblood could hear the yellow pony run off. During that brief moment of silence, his head fell. Finally, his father's voice started up. "You said you wouldn't be doing this any more."

Blueblood said nothing, so his father continued, his voice gradually rising in intensity and volume. "You promised me, very clearly, that you wouldn't put yourself in danger like this. Remember when you set yourself on fire? You could've been killed this time!" Blueblood's father tried to speak for a moment, but he couldn't make anything come out of his mouth for a good several seconds. Just as he finally started to speak again, though, Blueblood found his voice.

"I don't want to do this anymore."

Blueblood's father paused as his son choked out those words. "I want to learn business," he continued. "I-I shouldn't be a scientist."

Then Blueblood sobbed, his head falling to face the earth. Out of the corner of his eye, he could see his father move around to the front of him. A hoof under his chin tilted his head back up. His father wasn't scowling, just softly frowning. For a brief moment, his eyes flitted to Blueblood's flank. They quickly returned to Blueblood.

Blueblood flinched as his father summoned up a handkerchief and started wiping his face. "We'll talk about it later," his father assured him. "Once your fetlock's healed and you're feeling better. And once you've had something edible to eat."

Blueblood's father glared at the cotton candy stall as he lifted Blueblood onto his back. The last thing Blueblood remembered before his eyes closed of their own accord was the announcer returning with a bag of ice.

<***>

"...have fun with that."

Sunset Shimmer stared at Blueblood as he turned and walked away. "What?" Blueblood could hear clacking on the crystal floor as Sunset ran up to him. "Oh, no you don't," she hissed. "You've got to help me get this under control!"

"Trust me, you're better off without me."

Before Blueblood could take another step, Sunset appeared right in front of him. "You're the only one who got to read those journals," she snapped at him. "The nearest expert is in Canterlot! By the time he gets here, the castle will collapse!"

"If I have anything to do with this, the castle will still collapse!"

Sunset's jaw dropped for a moment as her brow furled, but she still magically grabbed Blueblood by the mane before he could try and pass her. "Hold on," she said. "You're not making a whole lot of sense."

Blueblood tried to strike her, but Sunset managed to block his hoof, then shove him back onto his rear. Blueblood's nostrils flared as he tried to pull himself free. "LET GO OF ME!"

"What do you mean?" Sunset asked, her earlier irritation cooling only slightly. "How would you make this castle collapse?"

Blueblood tried to free himself, twisting and writhing and jerking away, but Sunset's magical stamina was stronger than he was. After a few moments, he ran out of energy. He glared up at her for a few moments. Then it faded as realization flashed across his face, his eyebrows rising as his eyes widened.

Soon, though, his glare returned, though his eyes were much less narrow. "I suppose you've never gotten to hear of me, Sunset Shimmer," he told her, "having just returned from the dead and all. I am Blueblood. Prince Blueblood, as everyone used to call me. I was named the brightest financial mind in the whole of Equestria, hoof-trained by my father, helping to take the mining business in our family to heights they could never have dreamed of. When my father retired, we were five years from being included in the Industrial Average."

Then his head dropped as he sighed. "Then everything came crashing down. Three months later, one of my regional managers turned out to be cutting corners on safety and criminally underpaying his workers. The press leapt at that, and combined with a deep market slump, the company took quite a hit. It hurt to settle with the workers and get everything up to code, but I managed. Stressful, but nothing too hard."

His frown turned into a scowl. "Then my Chief Financial Officer retired, so I hired someone else. On paper, she was fine: performed the same job, but wasn't given a proper salary and was often overworked. So I hired her, with the blessing of my head of HR." Blueblood had to pause here, his breath getting caught in his throat. "She then proceeded to steal me blind over the course of three months. By the time I could get her arrested, all I could do was close the doors."

Blueblood's lips pinched together as his eyes started to shimmer. "That's pretty much how my whole life has gone," he continued. "Everything I do, even when supervised, even when someone else does all the work and I just present it, turns into a disaster. I just looked at that crate, and it failed. If I try and help you now, I'm probably going get everyone killed." Then he turned away.

All the while, Sunset frowned at him, though softly. When she tried walking around to face him, he turned his head back around to the other side. For a few moments, Sunset just stood there silently. Eventually, though, she cleared her throat.

"Then what else can happen?" she asked him. "If these things get out, the heat they make could cause another volcano, which will destroy Ponyville and probably get a lot of people killed. If you help me and it doesn't work, then the same thing happens. If you help me and we at least manage to delay the problem until the expert can get here, then we can save at least a few lives."

This got Blueblood to turn around for a moment, still scowling and with water trails down his face. She raised her hoof and brought it towards Blueblood, but he shied away from it. Sunset stayed silent for a moment. "I know what it's like to hit rock bottom," she told him, "and I know how it feels not thinking it can get any better. But I had friends who helped me pull myself back up."

"So did I," Blueblood rumbled. "It still didn't work."

With that, Blueblood's eyes closed and he sighed. Sunset was quiet, keeping her eyes on Blueblood as her mind worked. For a good, long time, neither of them said anything. Finally, Blueblood's eyes opened. "They were fed live prey," he said. "During a specific ritual. But according to the archaeological records, they only ate from the bellies of victims."

Sunset nodded. "OK," she said. "So, we can guess they like fats and tender meats. If we were to give them a non-pony substitute..."

She gasped as Blueblood's frown faded, and the two spoke together. "Bacon."

<***>

A moment later, several pony-sized portions of bacon had been wrapped together and were laying on the floor. By this point, most of the guards had formed up, casting magic at the wall. Despite their efforts, though, they were now running all of the way down the now red-hot wall, and the hallway felt like a blast furnace, even behind the magical heat shield in front of the hallway. Everypony was covered in a thick layer of sweat. "OK," Sunset said. Then she turned to one of the guards. "How are the guests?"

"Evacuated," he said. "Princess Twilight is directing emergency crews to stand by."

"Good." Then Sunset turned back to Blueblood. "You remember the words?"

For a second or two, Blueblood stood stiffly. Soon, though, he nodded. Sunset nodded back, then looked back to the guards. "OK, weaken the barrier on my mark." She then moved to the front of the door. After a momentary pause, Blueblood followed. "Ready?" she asked Blueblood.

Blueblood shook his head. "Probably not, but let's get this over with."

After a brief pause, Sunset patted Blueblood on the shoulder. Then she spun around to the guards. "Alright," she snapped, "ready? MARK!"

The shield in front of the ponies and the magic on the wall started to fade. Instantly, a wave of heat blasted forwards. Sunset's horn lit up, layering the guards in magical heat shielding of her own. Without its own magic, the physical wall cracked and splintered, leaving a hole in the door. "Alright, Blueblood," Sunset said. "Your turn."

Blueblood walked forwards. He magically picked up the three sacks of meat as he walked forwards, trying to ignore the sinking feeling in his stomach or the oppressive heat of being cooked alive. He stopped right behind the magical barrier, packs of bacon at the ready. He tried to take a breath, but the oppressive heat reminded him not to dawdle. Thus, he started to speak. He had no idea what the words meant as he began to speak them, having not delved into linguistics too much, and nothing seemed to happen at first.

But then Blueblood could see the light on the wall fading away, and the temperature seemed to drop a fraction of a degree. The words coming out of Blueblood's mouth momentarily dropped in volume, but that only lasted a tick. The three packages of bacon drifted forwards as Blueblood kept speaking, trying not to fumble as the sweat continued to pour into his mouth. As the packages drifted closer and closer, the heat dropped little by little. When they entered the room, though, it was still sweltering.

At last, Blueblood finished his chant. For a moment, nothing happened. A loud CRACK showed one of the cracks widening. Blueblood turned back to Sunset, who spared him a brief glance before turning forwards. The stream of magic to the shielding spells flickered a little as one of the guards stumbled. At once, Blueblood dashed to his side and propped him up, but his magic stream failed, and the heat shield began to collapse.

Then the crystal began to stop glowing, and the heat began to fall. As the incandescence ebbed back into the lab, the temperature continued to drop. Blueblood watched in a small bit of awe as the cherufes' magic began to undo itself. Finally, the only part of the castle glowing was the crystal on the walls of the lab, and that was much softer then it had been already.

Sunset's magic then shot forwards, establishing another barrier over the laboratory. "Alright," she called out. "Good work. Everybody fall back and rehydrate." Sunset herself then moved forwards, watching Blueblood pass the unconscious guard pony off to another guard. "Well done," she told Blueblood, smiling as she said it.

In response, Blueblood just looked at her, mouth set in a grimace. "Give it a moment," he said, turning back to the lab. "For all I know, we're about to have another blast of heat or something."

"We won't."

Blueblood and Sunset turned around. Twilight Sparkle, out of her regal regalia, was walking a green earth mare down the hallway "The cherufes should be easily containable for another two years," the mare said, "even with just one unicorn. Though I am curious, the stasis box wasn't supposed to fail like it did."

Blueblood glared at the mare for a moment, then turned to Sunset. "I didn't see her here," Sunset said.

"Rainbow Dash just brought her back," Twilight said. "I think she actually broke a speed record getting here."

As she spoke, Blueblood's eyes zeroed on Twilight, but almost instantly, the anger winked out of them. Instead, he just turned to the side and sighed. "Well," he said, trying to sound composed, "please thank her for me."

Twilight walked over to Blueblood. "It wasn't your fault," she assured him.

For a moment, Blueblood stiffened up. That quickly evaporated, though, into another sigh. He tried to walk off, but Twilight stepped in front of him. "Blueblood-"

"Twilight, thank you for inviting me to your castle," he told her, very softly, "but I need to be getting back to my... hotel. I need to shower all of this sweat off."

Blueblood tried to walk around her, but Twilight moved to block him. "You could-"

"I'd rather not," Blueblood interrupted. "Twilight, please don't worry about me. I'll start another business or something. Wait until all of this blows over, call in a few favors, I'll get on with my life."

Blueblood moved to one side. When Twilight didn't move to block him, he continued down the hallway. His face was completely neutral as he kept walking. Then, though, Sunset dashed in front of him, a smile on her face.

"Blueblood," she asked, "would you like to see something interesting?"

Author's Note

OK, it's finished. I'm sorry this took so long. Part of it was my test (which I passed), part of it is that it's much longer than what I've previously done, but I think also that a certain disorder I have is acting up again. As such, whenever I encountered a problem with this, I kept putting off working on it until recently.

But now, I have finally finished it. Again, my sincerest apologies in leaving it waiting, I hope the next chapter won't take as long to write. To help with that, I'm actually going to give blogging about my writing a try, discussing at least the basics of what I'm doing, or at least giving updates on my life. Expect the first blog shortly. Until then, please comment.