Minuette, Part II: Mummies, Tentacles, and Shit
After suddenly becoming rich, Minuette decides to invest her money wisely. Delivery services company – yeah, that sounds good enough. Nothing can go wrong with that...
An adventurer... Yeah, that sounds proud. Totally not like "guy who machetes their way through the jungle while mosquitoes bite their ass". You go on an adventure, you want to find a treasure, you need lots of stuff to be transported to some Celestia-damned hole... Well, here's where you'll need me.
My name is Minuette. I swear, I only wanted to live a calm life, with occasional hint of adventure. Now I'm fighting mummies, zombies, tentacles, eldritch abominations, mercenaries from Manegascar, and bill collectors. And it's all Vinyl's fault. Again.
Pre-read by Bootsy Slickmane
Russian translation by repitter:
- 🇺🇦Ponyfiction🇺🇦
- 🇺🇦GoogleDocs🇺🇦
144009 words: Estimated about 12 hours to read
Download:
15 Chapters:
- There’s no way to turn thirty in this town without all the citizens waiting for you in your fridge. 2015-03-02 19:17:04 UTC5704
- I’m not gonna tell my grandkids that I teamed up with Daring Do only to find a golden toilet plunger. 2015-03-31 19:05:39 UTC7524
- I’m pretty sure we can’t expect a warm welcome here again. Pun not intended. 2015-06-05 22:17:00 UTC13083
- I never expected that I’d tell that story to a bunch of hippies, but, as The Book of Vinyl Scratch says, one has to adapt or end up in a plastic bag at the bottom of the Horseshoe Bay. 2015-07-14 22:44:57 UTC9156
- I don’t want to spend the rest of my life as a pair of eyeballs floating through multiverse. 2015-08-29 19:07:42 UTC9008
- After all, a rainforest without rain would be... well, I can’t come up with anything more insightful than an observation that rainforests without rain would be just forests. 2015-10-14 19:45:15 UTC13480
- She’d end up screwing those guys in their metaphysical butts with a stainless steel strap-on. 2015-12-03 21:08:46 UTC9568
- While Trixie admits it wasn’t the luckiest choice of words, it’s not a reason to cum buckets over it. 2016-01-07 22:07:34 UTC9125
- But pray tell, why are we sitting in this shithole? Shouldn’t we party, watching the world die or something? 2016-02-07 18:45:01 UTC15089
- Jogging, gym, and excessive masturbation can’t really combat the fact that I still like cheap, unhealthy food while having more money for it. 2016-03-25 19:39:46 UTC9963
- I’ve been turned into stone once and it’s not pleasant. Especially if you were about to pee and then you’re stuck with a full bladder for a week. 2016-05-11 18:52:08 UTC10021
- We’ll need fuel and resources if we want to get to the South Pole and it’s not like we can go to a store and buy some winter jackets after we blow up a whole block. 2016-06-20 21:06:11 UTC5953
- Monks from the Gelding Grotto have a similar thing. It’s thousands years old, but all it says are corny jokes. 2016-10-10 17:35:02 UTC6931
- I just looked into the face of one of these creatures and I am afraid that I have gone temporarily insane. 2016-12-01 19:14:54 UTC10038
- We’re orbiting some small, yet very colourful planet – something taken out of the dream of a stoned modern artist. 2017-04-15 17:13:39 UTC9366