Silver Spooner Issue -1: New Threads
It was a dark and stormy night. The rain pelted against the cold, hard ground, drowning the tiny insects who were foolish enough to wander around in this monsoon. The wind howled, frightening the little fillies who laid in their beds, who thought it was some demon in their closet. In short, it was the perfect night to brood for one brave heroine.
There, atop Ponyville’s own clock tower, stood the Legendary Silver Spooner. Her wet mane clung to her face as she sat there, staring coldly into the night, watching. Waiting. Her small, lithe body shivered underneath her brown and green colored outfit against her will, her teeth clattering uncontrollably.
“M-maybe this wasn’t such a-a good idea,” she muttered to herself. She didn’t even know what to brood about, honestly. And all the criminals of Ponyville were likely in bed at this time, meaning her being here was utterly pointless.
However, be that as it may, she was still a hero. And as such, whenever it was a cold, dark night, filled with rain and howling winds, it was her duty to brood. It was a sacrifice all great heroes had to endure.
Would be nice if I got paid more, at least, she thought with just a tinge of annoyance.
It was at that moment she felt the clock tower rumble beneath her, a loud, resounding bong noise, nearly shattering her ear drums, causing her to grit her teeth in pain. It was now midnight, well beyond her bed time.
“O-only two m-more hours of brooding l-left,” she said with a smile. She still had to think of something to brood about. Perhaps she could brood about school? Or about her classmates? Perhaps even… Forbidden love!
“Now… Who can b-be my forbidden love?” she asked herself, thinking of various ponies that she hated.
The first that came to mind was Apple Bloom. She was poor, a hick, and her parents were most likely her siblings. Nothing could be more forbidden than a pony born through incest, right?!
There was also Scootaloo, or as Diamond Tiara liked to call her, Orphan-loo. She was poor, just like Apple Bloom, and as the nickname suggested, an orphan. She didn’t come from a rich family and wouldn’t bring any prestige unto her own. Not only that, but Silver was fairly sure she would never fly, thus being a poor excuse for a pegasus. In short, she was a perfect candidate as well.
And finally, there was the white unicorn. Yes, she, who was the object of every colt’s dream. A mare of refinement, of beauty! With a voice that could send shivers down anypony’s spine!
Sweetie Belle’s sister.
Sure, our heroic Silver Spooner didn’t actually know Sweetie’s sister’s name, but that made the forbidden romance all the better! An adult mare, taking the young and succulent Silver Spooner into her hooves, caressing her body gently as she planted kisses against the nape of her neck.
“Oooh, yeah,” Silver Spooner thought as she imagined Sweetie’s sister cuddling with her in bed. The older mare’s delicate hooves massaging her shoulders after a long day of heroing around. Singing her a lullaby as she slowly fell asleep-
*BING
“Gah!” Silver Spooner shouted in fright as she felt the clock tower tremble again. Her thoughts in forbidden love must have made the last hour go by quickly. Silver sighed to herself, feeling drained after having imagined such a wonderful half-dream, only to be waken back into this cold, dreary weather. She still had another hour of brooding left, and she didn’t wish to go back to imaging forbidden love with Sweetie’s sister.
It was then she was met with an idea. An awful, wonderfully delicious idea. Surely Sweetie’s sister had heard of the Legendary Silver Spooner. And if she had heard of her, then she most certainly would be a fan.
A small, adorable smirk now adorned The Silver Spooner as she hopped onto her levitating spoon. It was time to pay a fan a visit.
Quiet and rather elegant snoring could be heard throughout the Carousel Boutique. It wasn’t the loud, obnoxious, “Rainbow Dash after drinking a barrel of cider” kind of snoring, but rather discreet, well-tuned breath.
Even her snoring is graceful, Silver Spooner thought, her spoon levitating a few feet from the window of Sweetie’s sister’s bedroom. Behind the glass pane, she could see her love whimpering, her mouth slightly twisting into a grimace as she began tossing and turning. Is she having a nightmare? Silver asked herself as she began prodding the window open.
It didn’t take her long, not with her experience in breaking into other mares rooms. Of course, she always used that skill with good intentions, making sure that the mares didn’t know she was there. But tonight, it was going to be different. Silver left her spoon outside, in case she had to evacuate quickly, and pushed herself through the window.
Luckily for her, the floor of the Carousel Boutique was sturdy. She felt that even if she jumped the ground wouldn’t creak at all! However, there was a different problem. While the armour made of spoons saved her life numerous times, it wasn’t exactly stealthy. The clinging of the spoons wasn’t loud, but it was echoing in Silver’s ears like an orchestra composed of all the Canterlot Musical School rejects who were sent to Tartarus for their crimes against music.
Sweetie’s sister moaned quietly. Silver Spooner stopped, trying not to make a faintest sound. It was then she felt a tingling in her nose. Her nose twitched as her mouth twisted into a snarl.
“Eh-eh!” Silver gasped, trying with all her might to hold it in. The tingling increased, as did the pain. What was worse, she realised that she’d forgotten to use the toilet before going out at night. One sneeze and she could be shamed forever in the eyes of her love.
This can’t be any worse, Silver thought. At the same moment, her left hoof started to itch. She began slowly backing up, trying to quickly yet silently get back to her spoon. She couldn’t meet Sweetie’s sister, not like this!
Suddenly, she felt herself bumping into small table standing by the window. She cursed herself for not noticing it earlier, even though she had to stand on it while getting inside of the room.
Luckily, the table made no noise. The needle that fell from it, however, did. Silver watched as it was falling in slow motion before bouncing off the floor with a barely audible cling.
Sweetie’s sister raised from her bed, trying to look around – it was futile since she was sleeping blindfolded as usual. “Who is here?” she asked groggily.
“Umm...” Silver muttered. Think of something! she thought. “...Silver Spooner?” she replied, immediately regretting it.
“Who?” Sweetie’s sister asked as she removed her mask, staring directly at our hero. It was then that Sweetie’s sister let out the most horrible, gargled scream that Silver had ever heard. “Aaah! Tacky home invader!”
“Wait! I can expla-” Silver was interrupted as she was pelted with various gems. Rubies, emeralds, and the occasional sapphire smashed into her delicate body, causing immense pain. “Come to me, my spoo-” she was interrupted as a large gem was thrown into her mouth, preventing her from calling forth her noble steed.
“Get out of my home, you fashion monstrosity!” Sweetie’s sister demanded as she rushed at Silver. Grabbing her by the mane, she was about to throw her out when she noticed one small detail. “...A filly?” Sweetie’s sister muttered, looking at the frightened Spoon.
“Actually...” Silver hissed in pain. “I was just passing by and wanted to ask if I could use a toilet...”
“Oh, sorry...” Sweetie’s sister smirked, letting Silver go. “I didn’t know... Of course you can go. It’s in the basement. You know, thick metal door with many locks.”
“That must be very, umm... inconvenient,” Silver Spoon muttered. Her sixth sense was telling her that something was wrong. Unfortunately, she’d never learned to listen to it.
“Here, let me show you the way,” Sweetie’s sister said as she led Silver into her basement, who followed obediently.
“So… Nice place!” Silver Spooner said, trying to strike up a conversation, her spoons clanging together.
“Thank you, uh…” Sweetie’s sister trailed off, trying to remember the filly’s name.
“Silver Spooner!” Silver said with pride.
“Alright then... Silver Spooner,” Sweetie’s sister muttered, shaking her head. “You see, those colors are just....” She paused, looking for a word which wouldn’t be considered inappropriate. “... off.”
“They’re stealthy,” Silver Spooner protested.
Sweetie’s sister sighed. “My dear, whoever told you that this particular shade of green is stealthy deserves to be thrown into the deepest pits of Tartarus.”
“...I don’t think Scootaloo would like that,” Silver muttered. “And actually, this is Mark 2. Mark 1 was red and black, but then Snips said that I looked like a transcolt.”
“I-I see,” Sweetie’s sister muttered. She has no eye for fashion… Good thing she came to me then! Sweetie’s sister thought confidently as the two finally made it to her basement. “Please, come in,” she beckoned as she entered the basement, much to Silver Spooner’s surprise.
I-is my dream coming true? Silver Spooner thought, a small smile making it’s way to her face.
“So...” Sweetie’s sister said, levitating a roll of white fabric. “I know it’s not exactly stealthy, but it’ll suit your coat and mane well.”
“But...” Silver muttered, but was quickly silenced.
“No buts. Second thing, you mostly work at night, right?” Sweetie’s sister asked, dumping white fabric on Silver. “Maybe that’s for the best... Anyway, those spoons are incredibly noisy. What talentless hack sewn them to that... thing?” She pointed at Silver’s outfit and shuddered.
“Me, actually...” Silver whispered. “And, before you say something, those spoons are staying. They make a good armor and, well, without them I wouldn’t be Silver Spooner, right?”
“I have nothing against spoons,” Sweetie’s sister replied, tearing one of the spoons off of Silver’s outfit and putting it on the white fabric. Then she stared at it for a while, tilting her head. “Okay, I think this will do. Take off your clothes.”
“What?” Silver asked, her eyes widening. “I think this is moving too fast. I don’t even know your name...”
“My name is Rarity,” Sweetie’s sist-er, Rarity replied. “And, for Celestia’s sake, what did you just think of?”
“N-nothing...” Silver muttered quickly, taking off her costume. Rarity levitated it and looked at it, wincing in disgust. Then, she tore the rest of the spoons off of it and put them aside. She examined the stitches and ripped them, using parts of Silver’s old costume as templates.
“Hmm... Wasn’t it a bit small for you?” Rarity asked, looking at Silver and levitating a measuring tape.
“Yeah…” Silver replied. “I was out of stitches, and Scootaloo wouldn’t...donate anymore thread.”
“So, we’ll have to measure...” Rarity muttered dryly. Silver felt the measuring tape boldly go where no pony dared to go before. She twitched and gave it a nasty look.
“We’ll need to make it a bit wider...”
“Wider?” Silver exclaimed. “I’m not Diamond Tiara...”
“Good. I won’t have to use so much fabric,” Rarity said, levitating a pair of scissors.
Silver Spoon watched with half drooped eyes. It was difficult watching somepony else making a dress for you, especially this late at night. Not only that, but this wasn’t nearly as romantic as she had hoped. Not only that, but she still needed to pee... Not to mention her spoon was still parked outside and she couldn’t recall when she’d last charged the batteries.
...I’m forgetting a lot of things lately, Silver Spoon realized with disdain. But I’ll never forget to fight crime!
When Silver thought that she’d have lose some of her dignity and do a potty dance, Rarity finally finished her outfit. She levitated it to Silver, smiling proudly.
Silver’s jaw dropped. The white fabric was incredibly smooth. It was also very sturdy – she wouldn’t have to patch it after every night of fighting crime. The spoons were tightly sewn to it; none of them made a sound when Silver took the outfit and put it on. She turned a few times, trying different moves. Finally, she felt comfortable in it.
“Thank you!” Silver exclaimed, hugging Rarity. She was quickly levitated away, but she tried to hug Rarity once more again – with the same effect.
“Enough!” Rarity said. “I think you should go home now. Your parents–”
“Don’t worry, they’re probably sleeping,” Silver said. “I have a lot of time to find some comfortable place and thank you... If you know what I–”
“Don’t you have some crime to fight?” Rarity asked, backpedalling.
“Oh yeah!” Silver Spooner smacked her forehead. “I almost forgot about fighting crime!” She ran out of the basement and called her spoon.
Rarity watched as the Silver Spooner quickly left her home, sighing to herself. “If only she were older,” Rarity mumbled, before finally going back upstairs and getting whatever beauty sleep she could manage.
The Silver Spooner was flying through the clouds. Her new outfit was ideally aerodynamic; she could now fly faster and take sharper turns. Wind was blowing through her mane as she dived to take a look at the streets of Ponyville at night.
Something, however, kept bugging her. For a while, she couldn’t put her hoof on it, but then, a sudden realisation struck her, a little too late.
“Ooooh, that’s so humiliating, yet soooo good!”
