Fox in the Hen House

Rarity's day seldom started with handsome strangers at the door of her shop. Today was clearly going to be the exception. Rarity checked herself in one of the many mirrors and flung the door open with dramatic flair.

"Welcome to the Carousel Boutique! How can I help you?" rarity fluttered her eyelashes.

"Good morning, I wonder if you would be so kind, as to help me out of a bit of a bind," Hengst flashed his teeth at her. She reacted instinctively. Somewhere up in the rafters, an unusually asymmetrical clothes moth cringed at the rhyme.

"Well, say no more! What can I do for you?"

"I am attending a rather important meeting and I require a suit intended to impress. Does that sound like something you can do? For me?" Hengst's patter was flawless.

"Can I do that? Can I do that? Why, that's what I do!" Rarity preened. "I will put together some designs for you and you can choose the one that suits you best. How soon do you need it?"

Hengst leaned close, "This morning preferably."

"This... morning?!" Rarity's eyes widened. She turned on her heels and flicked her mane back. Threaded needles rose from out of a haberdashery cabinet like charmed snakes and a Hengst-sized tailor's dummy shunted itself across the floor towards her. "But there's so much to do and... There's no time to lose - SPIKE!"

Spike scurried into the room, eyes crusted with sleep dust. He rolled up invisible sleeves and dove headlong into the gem chest. The irate little clothes moth took his cue to sneak out the door before things really started flying.

"Do we want flawless; flawed but affordable; or food grade?"

Rarity cast her eyes over Hengst, who smiled bashfully. "I think a physique this majestic calls for our very finest gems.

Spike rolled his eyes. This dappled doofus had the same cheesy grin as Trenderhoof. Rarity clearly had a type. He looked at himself in the mirror and practiced his own exaggerated grin until his cheeks ached.

"Fpikey-wikey!" Rarity mumbled with taut cotton between her teeth, "how are we doing with those gems?"

Oh, right! He rushed over, arms laden with the brightest stones he could find. They rose into a semi-precious tornado and began affixing themselves to the dark blue satin of the tunic taking shape on the dummy.

"Splendid, just a couple of adjustments and..." The needles swarmed down the belly of the garment, leaving a double-breasted brocade pattern in their wake, "voila! The finest outfit in the land for your very special meeting," Rarity announced as the tunic whizzed off the model and onto Hengst.

"My my, this is most grand indeed!" He exclaimed as he trotted round in circles admiring himself. "I am forever in your debt. How much do I owe you?"

Rarity did some quick calculations: fabric cost, Five bits; gems, an hour of Spike's and her time... "Four bits please," she said, leaning in.

"Oh dear, don't I feel silly. I only have two bits on me, you see? I don't suppose you could do me a massive favour?" He cupped her chin in his hoof and gazed into her eyes, "For me!" There was that grin again.

Rarity's eyelids fluttered in time to her racing heart. "Well, seeing as it's you, alright. Two bits."

"Thank you! Thank you!" Hengst kissed her on the nose and passed her the coins. "It's true what people say about you, you know, you are so generous. Good job, really. You need something to compensate for those rather obvious physical deformities!" Hengst was positively capering around the room with delight.

"My rather obvious WHAT?!" Rarity was set to blow a gasket, though it was Spike who had actual steam coming from his ears. In rooms full of mirrors it's a good job looks can't kill or Spike's might have ricocheted and killed them all.

Rarity's bawling erupted, sending flocks of nearby birds up into the air. The finely dressed stallion cantered out, still whinnying with glee. The last thing he heard as he departed was a barely intelligible wail of "I sold my heart for the price of a cherry Spikey-poo!!!"

Fluttershy was counting stag beetles when Hengst came trotting around the corner with the picnic basket in his teeth. The trees rustled as he went. Fluttershy admired the new outfit. Looks like a Rarity original, she thought. Rarity is one of my best friends, if she likes him, he must be alright.

"Hello Hengst," she put on her brave, unintentionally stressed face.

"Good morning. Shall we?"

They strolled down the road together, Fluttershy chatting about all the nature they passed along the way. Hengst constantly steering the conversation back to questions about her. They finally arrived at a secluded little spot by a brook. Hengst unfurled the plaid blanket and lay it down flat. Mostly flat. One side of the blanket was folded under itself. Hengst grunted and gave the blanket a flick. It resettled, the other side tucked under. Hengst frowned and tossed his mane, then tried again to lay the blanket out flat.

Up in the treetops, a mismatched pair of arms rested casually on a branch. Discord was having the best time already. Who would have thought that such a small interference could have so much mileage? He let the big oaf try two more times.

Fluttershy, seeing the stallion's frustration, leaned across and nuzzled the rumpled corner of the blanket perfectly flat. She thought she heard an uncontrollable cackle sound somewhere high above her. She looked up but could see nothing.

Discord was giddy with emotion. Just as he was getting bored of his own game, that wonderful pegasus had given him an out that was more emasculating than anything he could have come up with in that moment. She did it unintentionally too! He looked down to see the stallion snorting grumpily as he pulled the sandwiches out of the basket. Time for phase two of Discord's plan.

"Thank you for inviting me out, Hengst. Isn't it a lovely day?"

"Perfect!" Had he snapped? It felt like he had. He softened his tone. "A most perfect day, I would say. Beautiful surroundings; even more stunning company." A micro-expression of baring teeth eased into an affable grin.

Fluttershy smiled back as she picked up her sandwich. She stopped, pointing behind her. "Bees!"

The swarm descended on the couple, whirling around the lunch, then settled all over Hengst's hooves - their proboscides lapping feverishly.

"Well that was disappointing," Discord squeezed his beard thoughtfully.

Fluttershy raised an eyebrow, hoping Hengst would provide an explanation.

"Oh, did I not mention? The animals just love me." That smile again. Fluttershy didn't look terribly convinced. The bees started moving off drowsily.

Meanwhile, Discord was trying to choose which misfortune to visit upon the picnic next. Clearly anything to do with the local wildlife was going to be a swing and a miss with this guy. "Pelt them with owl pellets? Too soon... Turn the brook into overflowing blood? Too much." He paced up and down along the branch. "Think, Discord, think!" He stamped his foot, the branch snapping off and tumbling downward. Discord flapped in mid-air, checked that the branch would miss Fluttershy. "That'll do for now".

Hengst glimpsed the branch in his peripheral vision and saw an opportunity: even though it was about to squarely land on him alone, he threw himself at Fluttershy shouting "Look out!"

The branch crashed down, shaking leaves everywhere. Hengst stayed protectively above Fluttershy as the adrenaline faded.

"You saved me!" She said, nuzzling him gratefully. Up in the canopy of the tree, the sound of antler and goat horn smacking the trunk repeatedly.

Hengst caught his breath and gazed into Fluttershy's eyes. She was staring back, heart pounding. They leaned in toward one another, lips almost meeting.

"Stop it! Stop it!" Discord mouthed desperately, as he scrambled to think of something to interrupt the moment. "Dog fart breath!" He shouted triumphantly and braced to click his fingers. Before he could do so however, a small purple dragon barrelled into Hengst, throwing him off-balance with surprise. Spike was a yelling flurry of furious teeth, claws, and tail. He launched himself again and again at Hengst who, having composed himself, was keeping Spike just out of reach.

"This isn't going to last long if I don't help," beamed Discord, clicking his fingers. The baby dragon with the fists of fury suddenly became a significantly larger dragon. Not large enough to wipe Hengst out but no longer something he could just ignore. The new, improved Spike grabbed hold of Hengst's tunic and did a barrel roll in mid-air, tearing it asunder.

"My lovely tunic!" Hengst nipped cruelly at Spike's tail and the two spun round and round in a circle of flame and phlegm.

"Enough!" Fluttershy stepped forward and Spike backed away. Fluttershy's hoof on Hengst's chest prevented him from pursuing.

"Stay away from M'lady!" Spike growled and shot off into the trees.

"What was that about!" Fluttershy asked.

"I can't be sure but I think someone is messing with us," Hengst said, straightening his singed mane.

"Yea, and I think I know who too," Fluttershy looked up into the tense silence of the tree top.