Soarin's Pet Rock

by Beware The Carpenter

Rating: teen
Tags: Scootaloo, Random, Adventure, Alternate Universe, Original Character, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Soarin, Rainbow Dash, Comedy, Romance, Prince Blueblood
Length: 18003

Most people wouldn't think that a pet rock could have many adventures. Most people would be wrong.

Most people wouldn't think that a pet rock could have many adventures.

Most people would be wrong.

FIMfiction says that the sad tag contradicts with comedy. I disagree.

Satellite story to Limits of the Horizon

Picture by Awalex

Published 2015-03-13 04:40:02 UTC
Last updated 2015-04-19 17:05:58 UTC

1 - It's a Trap!

Stoner was a rock.

Stoner was Soarin’s pet rock, and wouldn’t want to be anyone else’s rock in the world if it meant leaving his bro. He’d been with Soarin, through thick and thin, since they were kids. He’d stood guard for the boogycolt when Soarin slept as a foal, comforted Soarin when he dropped out of school, motivated him to keep exercising when they were at pegasus fat camp together, encouraged him when he was stuck in a deadbeat job selling corndogs at Wonderbolt shows, and celebrated with him when Soarin finally succeeded on his third attempt of joining the legendary team.

They were best friends; and even now that Soarin was rich and famous; he never forgot to feed Stoner, or water his mossy mane to keep him looking good. Whenever he could, Stoner would help Soarin keep organized by keeping track of the post-it notes which Soarin stuck to his hoof, but most of the time he just relaxed on Soarin’s dresser and watched his best buddy enjoy life. Usually, Soarin would be doing something interesting enough to keep Stoner entertained, and tonight was no exception:

It was Thursday night. Saturday was the Canterlot Cup finals, where the Wonderbolts would go head to head with the team from Oatlantis to defend their titles as the best stunt-flier pegasi in the world. Team captain Rainbow Dash was giving everyone tomorrow off to make sure they’d be fresh for the big show; meaning most of the team was going to be out late tonight, but Stoner still wasn’t surprised when he heard his buddy groan excitedly in the hallway, followed by an eager thud of two ponies hitting the wall.

There was a jangling of keys at the door and it fell open as Soarin came crashing in with a hot pegasus babe on top of him, who stopped every few pants to take pictures with the camera she was holding. Stoner would have offered to take the pictures for them, so the mare could use both hooves to tickle Soarin, but he couldn’t. He was a rock.

Soarin was out of his clothes first, with the mare backing off to the dresser, daring him to come get her. Soarin kicked the door shut, and then flew towards her, trying to pull her dress off as she kissed him ravenously before pulling away and whispering; “Now close your eyes and I’ll give you a surprise that will take your breath away.”

Soarin obeyed instantly, his mouth grinning in anticipation; ohh, this was gonna be good! The mare draped one hoof around Soarin’s neck, and with the other, she reached for Stoner; no wait, what was she doing? NO!

Stoner tried to run away, but the mare grabbed him behind the neck and then smashed him into Soarin’s forehead. Soarin’s eyelids opened just long enough for Stoner to see his eyes roll back in his head and then the mare dropped both of them to the ground. She looked around briefly and then turned around and started pulling out the dresser drawers, rummaging through the contents, and just as she did Stoner accidentally managed to look up her dress and saw a cutie mark of a lockpick and a broken window. Stoner tried blowing on Soarin’s face to get him to come to, but dude was out cold. “Soarin! Wake up, buddy! She’s stealing all our stuff!”

The mare galloped over to Soarin’s closet, and opened it, then gave a small laugh and began pulling out Soarin’s Wonderbolt uniforms. He only had ten, and the mare greedily stuffed nine into her saddlebags, before turning hungrily towards the one Soarin had left on the floor.

“Get away from that! Soarin needs at least one uniform or he can’t be in the show!” The mare didn’t listen; skipping over to Soarin’s last suit, she stuffed it greedily into her already budging saddlebags. How was Soarin supposed to compete? “Soarin! Wake up, bro!” It was too late. The mare made one final sweep over the room and then made for the window.

She stopped just long enough to blow Soarin one final kiss, and then, she was gone.

Author's Note

This is partially a challenge to myself on how sympathetic/ likable I could make Soarin, without doing anything to contradict his appearance in Storm of Secrets where I got carried away making all of the Wonderbolts one-dimensional stupid, lazy cowards.

It was also a challange to see how complex of a story I could make from the point of view of a rock.

Tell me how I went.

Just as an aforethought, Stoner's name does not mean that I was not on drugs when I wrote this. I've never used recreational drugs however I was sleep deprived when I came up with the idea, which I'm told can have a similar effect.

3 - Bluey will help us

A lot of rich ponies in Canterlot were boring jerks, but Bluey wasn’t like that. He’d been a Wonderbolt fan since he was a kid, and when Soarin made the team; Bluey was one of the first people to congratulate him, and since then the two of them had been great friends:

Bluey had introduced Soarin to his friends at the country club, Soarin had helped Bluey dodge his wacked out stalker ex-marefriend; and both of them as the other’s wingman on dates. The coolest part about him was that Bluey was one of the few people who didn’t laugh when Soarin showed him Stoner for the first time and had even made Stoner a little bungalow on a dinner cart for when Soarin came over on Mondays.

Bluey and Soarin would play high-stakes poker with the rest of the gang, and Stoner would sit back and watch, sipping the margarita Bluey’s butler would pour for him, and Soarin would always wait for him to finish before leaving. (Stoner didn’t actually drink it though, he just liked to sip the bubbles off the top, since they had all the flavor.)

Bluey was smart too; he had this thing for statistics and reading, and he was always making bets on who would win the next Wonderbolt Derby. Since becoming friends with Soarin, Bluey had been winning more than ever; both stallions agreed that some of Stoner’s good luck must be rubbing off on him.

Bluey was sitting on his balcony when they arrived, eating breakfast with that puckish smile that he always had when he was up to something interesting. When he saw Soarin and Stoner fly up, he gave a wave and pushed out another chair for Soarin, but Soarin’s worried glance chased Bluey’s smile back into the house. “What happened?”

Soarin landed heavily on the balcony opposite of Bluey and sighed, “I got jipped last night.”

“Oh yeah?” said Bluey, pulling a sip of coffee and a new smile out of his coffee mug, “From what I heard from Wave Chill things went pretty well, said you left with a fangirl who was practically begging you to have her.”

“Yeah” muttered Soarin, “And then she knocked me out and stole all my uniforms.”

Bluey choked on his coffee, wheezed a few times into a handkerchief, then gave Soarin a real hard look, “She got all your uniforms?”

“Yup.”

“You can’t compete without a uniform, can you?”

“Nope.”

“Wave Chill is still out with the sprained wing, and Firestreak’s down with food poisoning, so without you, the Wonderbolts are have lost three of their five best fliers.” Soarin nodded, and Bluey banged his head against the table. “When did this happen?”

“Last night, like, nine or something. She must have hit me pretty hard, cause I slept through the night.”

“Of course you did.” Bluey muttered, “If we can get your uniforms back, are you still fit to play.”

“Sure.”

“Alright then.” Breathed Bluey deeply, “What was her cutie-mark?”

“Don’t know.” Shrugged Soarin, “She was wearing a pink dress the whole time.”

“Well, what species was she?”

“Pegasus.”

“Colors?”

“Light gold with a greyscale mane.”

“Did she give you a name?”

“Daring Do.” Bluey raised his eyebrows, his mouth moving by itself, but Stoner couldn’t make out any of the words, “Have you heard of her?”

“… Yea man… she’s not real.”

“What do you mean?”

“She’s fiction.”

Soarin swallowed nervously, “You mean I got jipped by a ghost?”

“No. she’s a character in a book; she fights bad guys, collects cursed treasure, stuff like that.”

Stoner felt a chill run through his spine as Soarin turned pale, “You think someone cursed my uniforms, and that’s why she took them?”

Bluey looked at him for a moment, blinked hard and then shook his head; “Never mind dude. Do you have any leads at all at finding… Daring Do?”

Stoner and Soarin looked at each other, then back to Bluey and shrugged; “We got zilch.”

“Alright.” Moaned Bluey, rubbing his forehead with his hoof; “I might have an idea of who took them. It’s not sure, but these last few days there have been a lot of bets coming in for the Canterlot Cup… an LOT of bets, meaning a lot of my money is riding on you. Most of these have come through small-time brokers who couldn’t afford to lose what they’ve wagered, meaning they have a backer, someone wealthy who is very sure that the Wonderbolts are going to lose the Canterlot Cup.

Most of this backdoor backing looks like the orchestrator wanted to keep his business a secret… but was rather sloppy at it which makes me think that it was done by someone who wasn’t from around here.” Stoner and Soarin leaned forwards, as Bluey stood up and took a lap around the table, watching pure genius at work.

“There’s a crew of griffons that’s moved in from the north a few months back, led by a guy called Kravennar who was a baron or something whose made it big back home and is trying to expand. So far though, things haven’t been going too well for him since business in Canterlot works differently than in Gryffindor. I’d put it at a fifty-fifty chance that he orchestrated the bets and then hired… Daring Do to steal your uniforms as a last ditch effort to make it big here.”

“So what do we do?”

“You are not going to do anything. You’re going to sit here where you can’t get in any more trouble and eat some breakfast so you’re fit for tomorrow.”

“Well, what are you gonna do?”

“I’m going to send out some feelers to-“

“Some what?”

Blueblood paused, “I’m going to send some guys to check out whether I’m right or not, they’ll be back in a few hours.” Bluey nodded to his butler Carriage Crest who trotted off like he was on his way to do something cool, and then Blueblood poured Soarin his own cup of coffee and pushed the fruit bowl in his direction. “So how’s Fleet Foot been liking her new diet?”

Bluey really was a great guy; he always showed an interest in everyone on the team; not just as athletes but as people. If someone had gotten injured, for instance, Bluey wanted to know about it so he could send a get well soon card and was even interested in little things like who was stressing out or not sleeping well because of family issues and stuff like that. Soarin dug happily into a ripe banana, and then a tray of pancakes with maple syrup as he talked with Bluey about this and that. Stoner just nibbled on the corner of one pancake that Soarin gave him, but he really wasn’t that hungry.

Topics changed to this and that, Soarin was having such a good time that he almost forgot the whole problem with his uniforms until Carriage Crest came galloping in at some time past noon, holding a set of photos. He offered them to Bluey who looked them over briefly before passing them to Soarin, “Is this the mare who took the uniforms?”

Soarin examined at the pictures; then looked to Stoner for confirmation who gave a definite nod. “That’s her.”

“She came to Kravennar’s warehouse last night with some bulging saddlebags, and left without them.” Informed Carriage Crest, “There hasn’t been much movement since then, so it’s almost certain that they’re still there.”

“Alright!” cheered Soarin and Stoner, standing up with hooves raised high. “Now let’s go get the town guard and send them in.”

“Now hold on!” called Bluey to Soarin, who was already half-way to the door, “We need to be smart about this man, we don’t need the town guard.”

“We don’t?”

“If Kravennar gets arrested you’ll get your uniforms back, sure; and he’ll be fined, maybe even sent to jail… but all his bets are now invalid. He’s just bet a mountain of bits that you’re not going to play tomorrow if you get your uniforms without the law getting involved, we are going to be very rich ponies.”

“…So what do we do?” asked Soarin, excitedly… and nervously.

Bluey clamped his hooves together and got out another one of his puckish grins. “We wait for the cover of night, and we take them.”

Author's Note

I did not plan to write Blueblood as a criminal mastermind; it just sort of happened.

4 - For Want of a Uniform

Stoner was so excited! He was waiting in an alleyway a few corners away from Kravennar’s warehouse with Soarin, Bluey, Carriage Crest, a lawyer, a dog, and a couple of the Oatlantis marines that Bluey’s mom had sent with him to Canterlot to keep him out of trouble.

Together, they were first squad. Everyone had balaclavas on to hide their faces, even Stoner whose mask Soarin had made for him earlier that day out of a cup-holder; but Stoner wasn’t sure it would help much. Not many pet rocks were cool enough to get taken on a secret heist, so if someone did see Stoner, there wouldn’t be many suspects.

Ahead of them, there was a squawk, and then the pulse of a stun-spell; and then everything went quiet.

Stoner held his breath and waited for an alarm to go off, nothing happened. A moment later there were soft hoofetps in the alley and then Captain Night Dive poked his head around the corner, nodded to Bluey, and everyone followed him into the next building and up the stairs to where the rest of second squad was waiting, along with a griffon whose legs and beak had been tied up.

A few moments later, someone from third squad also showed up, carrying a griffon that’d been knocked out. “Both sentries are down.” whispered Night Dive to Bluey, “Third squad will block escape, second squad will secure target; you stay here with first squad and guard the prisoners. We’ll call you in when it’s time to meet Kravennar.”

Bluey nodded and second squad rose to leave, Soarin stood up with them, but Bluey put a hoof on his back and pushed him back to the ground. “What do we do?”

Bluey sighed, and then glanced towards the prisoners; the unconscious one was starting to come too, “Keep an eye on those guys; keep them quiet. They should have at least two people watching them at all times.”

“OK.”

“Stoner doesn’t count.”

Now that hurt.

Soarin picked up Stoner, pointed him towards the prisoners, and then sat down next to Carriage Crest who was standing over both prisoners with his horn lowered.

“Soarin?”

Soarin looked over to Stoner, “Yeah?”

“What did Bluey mean by, ‘I don’t count’? I’m a person aren’t I?”

“Of course you are; you’re my little bro.”

“I mean, I’ve always watched out for you haven’t I? I’m a good watcher, so why does Bluey say I don’t count? Doesn’t he like me anymore?”

“I don’t know… I’ll ask him.”

Soarin turned around, but Bluey was looking over the railing with a telescope... he looked busy, there had to be someone else that Soarin could ask. “Hey Carriage Crest?”

Carriage Crest got an annoyed look, stepped to the side of the prisoners and glanced at them, “Yea?”

“Why doesn’t Stoner count as a person for watching the prisoners?”

Carriage Crest raised an eyebrow, “You’re kidding, right?” Both Stoner and Soarin looked at him and Carriage Crest sighed, “Look, Stoner is a great watcher, but we need to do more than just ‘watch’ the prisoners; we need to be able to stop them if they untie themselves, or get help, and Stoner can’t do that. All he could do is watch them get away.” Stoner smiled, that made a lot of sense.

Both of griffons gave them a really weird look.

Eighty-one, eighty-two, eighty-three, eighty-four! Soarin put down the griffon he was holding, which tried to scramble away, but Soarin flipped him over, pinned it down and started counting the feathers on the other wing. Carriage Crest had told him how it was important to count the feathers on a griffon’s wings because if they had seven more feathers on their left then on their right, it meant that they might be sorcerers, waiting for the chance to use their to strike.

Soarin and Stoner had gotten to work counting right away, but Carriage Crest didn’t help. He said someone needed to be there to help Soarin if the griffon did cast a spell on him, and since Stoner wouldn’t be able to repel dark magic, it needed to be him.

Suddenly the warehouse beneath them woke up with a bunch of sounds. Stoner heard shelves get toppled over, griffon shrieks, pulses of stun spells and the popping of griffon pistols. Everyone crouched down, one of the prisoners started struggling and almost got his talons free before Carriage Crest kicked him in the ribs; and then everything went quiet again.

Bluey and Soarin waited and then Night Dive flew out a broken window and landed next to Bluey, a few scratches on his armor and a cold smile on his face, “Warehouse secure, come inside and meet your prisoner.”

Inside, the warehouse was cold, dark and messy. Loose feathers scattered the floor among various debris and a few drops of fresh blood. Between two of the shelves that hadn’t collapsed were about ten griffons that were tied up, unconscious, in a net. In the next row over was a little hospital where two of Bluey’s soldiers and three griffons who’d been wounded were being taken care of another one of Bluey’s guys.

In the middle of the room was a huge griffon, tied to a chair under a light looking very unhappy, Bluey took off his balaclava and faced him, looking smug, “Where are the uniforms?”

Kravennar just hissed at him, Bluey shrugged then turned around and gave a small whistle; “Belter.” The dog that had been following them ran forwards, looked at Bluey for a moment and then started sniffing Soarin up and down, tickling his belly and then ran into the main office, tail wagging behind him. Soarin and Bluey followed Belter in and found him trying to stick his nose behind a bookshelf. Bluey used his magic to pull the bookshelf away from the wall, revealing a closed safe which Belter began pawing at.

“Well that’s interesting,” Bluey mused, “Belter seems to think something that smells like Soarin is in this safe here… you did remember to clean the uniform Soarin had used, before stashing it in there; didn’t you?” Kravennar gave a punctured growl, and Bluey continued, “We’ve got the equipment to crack a safe, and the time to do it in, this will be a lot easier if you just tell us what to code is.”

Kravennar stared Bluey for a long minute then spat on the ground, “Seven, five, eight, three zero.” Bluey smiled and stepped aside as Carriage Crest entered the code. There was a soft click, and then the safe door swung open showing a whole pile of stuff, and in the front were Soarin’s uniforms!

“Alright!” Soarin and Stoner shouted in unison.

“They look intact,” said Bluey, passing the pile to Soarin, “But you’d better check them to make sure they weren’t tampered with, just in case.” Soarin started digging through the uniforms. Meanwhile, Stoner kept watching the lawyer Bluey had brought with him who now approached Kravennar.

“Now I’m sure you realize that tampering with the Canterlot Cup would be considered a serious offense if it was to be brought to court. You’d be facing fines of about five million bits, and even if you did manage to avoid the ten to fifteen years jail you’d be likely to serve, the publicity would cost you your franchise here… and at home.”

Bluey put his hoof up and then took over “Now I could leave here with the uniforms, not say anything about this, and then you’d only be facing losses of about three million, and that’s assuming that the Wonderbolts lose… but I’m just not feeling that generous.”

“I will leave Canterlot.” Promised Kravennar, “I will not come back.”

“Good.” Nodded Bluey, “That’s a start, but I’m not quite sure I’m feeling it yet.”

Kravennar sighed, “You already found my safe, anything valuable is in there; my gift to you.”

“That sounds reasonable.” Smiled Bluey, “… I… guess I’ll just leave you here with a few of my guys for the night to make sure you don’t cause any more trouble. We’ll let you go once the show is over.”

Kravennar cursed something Stoner couldn’t make out, and Bluey trotted back into the main office, swept the tables clean of paperwork on them and then filling them with the stuff from the vault. “All my uniforms are OK,” shouted Soarin, after looking over the last one for booby traps, “Nothing wrong with them.”

“Glad to hear it.” Smiled Bluey looking between his friend and his treasure, “You know what… why don’t you take something, first pick of the haul.”

Soarin and Stoner’s eyes widened, “Really?”

“Sure; wouldn’t have any of this if it wasn’t for you.”

Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy, oh boy! Soarin grabbed Stoner and together the two of them began shuffling through all the stuff that was there. “Careful!” Bluey called, steadying a funky doodad Soarin had nearly knocked over, but Soarin wasn’t listening. It was like Hearths Warming Morning; only you got to choose what you got.

There were gismos and gadgets and a painting of a griffoness wearing lots of jewels; a locked chest Soarin couldn’t be bothered looking for the key of, a pistol with a shiny platinum barrel and quartz grip and… pretty.

Soarin picked up the amulet and showed it to Bluey, “Can I take this?”

Bluey shrugged, “Sure, why not.”

Behind Bluey, Stoner saw Kravennar’s eyes widen some, convincing him that Soarin must have gotten something really cool. Soarin lifted the chain around his neck, which then seemed to clasp by itself, and then red-hot pain went searing through Stoner’s spine, his hoof went numb, and felt as though his green mossy mane had just withered and died.

“…Whoa.” Stammered Soain. “…I feel great!”

5 - The Grip of Darkness

"Mwhawahha! Hahahmwhaha!

“No dude! Snap out of it!”

“MhAhHHa! MWWWhaaahaa Mhamhahahiea!!

“Soarin buddy, stop before it’s too late!”

“"MwhawhwMWAahha! HAHAwhaHA! MhammmwHAHAhieA!!”

“Let her go! She hasn’t done anything to deserve this!”

"MHWAAhemaHMheaWA! MHAmhaWWAhwaMmWHA! HMMheAMWHAmheaMWEmeH!

Stoner tried, but it was no use; Soarin just wouldn’t listen to him. Ever since he’d put that amulet around his neck, it was like he’d changed into a different person, one who’d devoted his life to unspeakable acts of pure evil.

After leaving Bluey at the warehouse, Soarin should have gone home to bed. The big show was tomorrow and Soarin needed sleep, but instead, he went flying. Rising with rapid ease above Canterlot, he looked down in contempt at the innocent, sleeping forms of the denizens of the fields below, and embarked on a merciless and unparalleled rampage of cow tipping.

Stoner tried to stop him, but the amulet was just too strong; and within the space of a few minutes, more than a dozen helpless victims had been cast to the ground, crying out in shock and pain, leaking body fluids as Soarin flew away laughing. He returned to Canterlot, his heart darkened, and spirit emboldened and began door knocking at random. Not just one or two houses mind you, but entire streets! By the time the first door was opened, Soarin would have knocked on every door, and already hidden in the clouds above, reveling in his unholy speed and the confused neighborhood he had disturbed.

By the time the sun rose, the darkness had consumed Soarin entirely. When the public swimming pool opened, Soarin was one of the first ones in and then, when no one was looking… he peed in it. It was disgusting, and yet now, before Stoner’s very eyes, Soarin was doing something more despicable than everything else he’d done put together.

It was just an hour before the show, and Soarin had been on his way to the Wonderbolt locker rooms when he saw the crowds lined up outside the stadium. Among them was a herd of foals. Sweet, innocent, trusting little foals who’d come all the way from Cloudsdale to watch the Canterlot Cup in their imitation Wonderbolt uniforms to cheer him on! Soarin began talking to them, but every smile hid his heart of stone. He pretended to appreciate their fandom, offered to sign their uniforms, and on every single one he intentionally spelled his name wrong!

When the foals got back to Couldsdale they were going to show people the uniforms, and say they’d been signed by Soarin, and then no one would believe them. The foals would be accused of forging false memorabilia; they would be shunned by their friends, cast out by their families, caused to question their own sanity as to whether or not they really had seen the famous Wonderbolt. They would be cursed, and ridiculed from both within and without; driven from civilization and forced to live in the wilderness where they’d resort to cannibalism to survive until only one remained who, driven mad by his guilt and loneliness, would be transformed into a slenderpony roaming wastelands and preying on the blood of hapless wanderers until the end of time!

“MWHAHEMMHAMA! HHAHAHMHAMWHMWHA! HWMAHWAMMHAWWHAM! HAHAMWHAHHMMWAHAAA!

“Soarin?”

Stoner didn’t even know if that name applied to his big brother anymore, but he spun around and saluted the sexy team captain Rainbow Dash, already in uniform; looking at him confused, “Why are you laughing like a supervillain from a kids comic book?”

Normally when Soarin needed hogwash fast he’d ask Stoner for help, but this time he just glanced down, to his amulet, and Stoner felt another wave of evil passing into Soarin; “… I’m… happy.”

Rainbow Dash blinked; “Fly with me” she ordered, gesturing to an isolated cloud, well out of earshot. Soarin followed without a word and landed down next to her, grinning, “Are you high?”

Soarin checked their altitude, “Only sixty feet.”

Dash leaned forwards, lowering her voice, “You know that they check us all for doping before and during the show. If you’re not clean, I will wring your neck.”

Soarin smiled, took Rainbow Dash’s unsuspecting hooves and placed them on either rise of his own throat, “The judges can check my downstairs all they want, and they wouldn’t find anything dirty, but you might.”

Rainbow Dash stared, blushed and scowled; and Soarin was gone, backflipping off the cloud and beelining towards the locker room to don with his reclaimed uniforms.

6 - Fire...

There were two teams left in the grand finals, The Wonderbolts and The Rocketeers; and each had three opportunities to prove themselves. There was a race, where three members of each team would compete in five, ten and twenty lap races around the stadium; with the team winning at least two rounds scoring a point. Second, there was a maze-like obstacle course with puzzles where four pegasi from each team worked together to unlock the orb, worth two points. Finally, the teams went head to head in three-rounds of freeform performances, with no limit; the first two rounds each being worth one point each, and the final round worth another two.

Rainbow Dash had chosen herself to be the sprinter in the five-lap race, and Spitfire for the ten, and Soarin to take the marathon twenty; given that Wave Chill was down with a sprained wing. Stoner was worried about him; he hadn’t slept or eaten since putting on the amulet, and yet he surged on with confidence and no hint of weariness.

The thing that really worried Stoner though, was that Soarin hadn’t spoken a word to him since he put that amulet around his neck. Normally before a show, Stoner would have a long conversation with Soarin to help him get his mind into the groove, and then Soarin would make sure that Stoner was comfortable on his pedestal in the Wonderbolt viewing box before heading out to perform. Today, he simply clunked him down like an empty bowl and headed for his station; not even caring that Stoner was at an angle and couldn’t see the whole stadium!

“Oi, Rainbow Dash, over here!” Stoner tried waving down the captain on her way back from the restrooms; she was smart, and suspicious that something was different about Soarin, but she walked right past him without giving him a second glance. Stoner cursed under his breath, but knew it had been a long shot; Rainbow Dash had never really liked him, and had only spoken to him a couple times when Soarin was there.

The races started.

Rainbow Dash obliterated her competition in the five-lap dash. Spitfire… not so much; her speed was good, but when she turned a tight corner her competitor launched past her leaving a wake that threw her off balance and skidding out of her lane. Everything rested of Soarin now; if he failed the first point would go to The Rocketeers. His face didn’t show it; he didn’t even sweat, he just strode casually up to the starting line, gave The Rocketeer a ten second head start, and then lapped him on the final round.

The crowd went wild.

For the obstacle course, Rainbow Dash had chosen Fleetfoot, Lightning Streak, Surprise and Silver Lining to represent the Wonderbolts, which was unfortunate because they all sucked. They made the first round of the obstacle course faster than the Rocketeers, but when they needed to stop and figure out some puzzles to get the keys for the orb, Surprise and Fleetfoot tried working on the same puzzle together, both reached for the same piece at the same time and knocked it out of each other’s hooves. Silver Lining left his post to try and catch it and by the time everyone was back where they were supposed to be, the Rocketeers were too far ahead for the Wonderbolts to catch up. Rainbow Dash swore quietly under her breath, but didn’t let it phase her.

Soarin just stared at his teammates failure with a maniacal grin; rubbing his hooves together slowly. He never said anything, but Stoner could still hear his evil laughter from earlier ringing through his ears. “Soarin…” he said evenly, “I know you’re excited about your new necklace, but you’re really starting to scare me. Could you just… do something that makes me think you’re still yourself.” Soarin didn’t respond, “I know; what if we go out to get some pie after the show, after that we can go to the movies, and I can hide in the popcorn whenever things get scary.”

Still silence, “… Can you at least turn me around so I can see the whole stadium?” Soarin finally looked at him with cold, unfeeling eyes, and then roughly shoved him so he was more centered, scraping Stoner’s butt on the pedestal in the process, “Oi! Watch it!”

Rainbow Dash called the team together for last minute review, and Soarin left without saying goodbye. The plan for the first round was an oldie but a goodie; it had been a crowd favorite a few years back, but when Zipper retired after his accident, there wasn’t anyone else who could take his spot, and so it hadn’t been done for a few years. Wave Chill had been practicing to replace him, however, and today would be the first time the routine had appeared in public in almost three years.

The second routine was a bit of a curve ball; it began as an exact replay of their show at the last Summer Sun Celebration, but then half-way through it transformed into something totally new, hopefully adding surprise to delight and winning a point. The finale would begin with the whole team, but quickly splintered away to just Rainbow Dash and Spitfire flying a duet, and would end in Dash’s Sonicrainboom. Hopefully the originality of Dash’s signature move hadn’t worn off yet.

The Rocketeers began off the first round of the shows; showing off this neat trick they had of hiding in dozens of little fireworks under their wings and in their uniforms, with speakers in them that played music before blowing up. Stoner knew he was meant to be rooting for the Wonderbolts as always, but he had to admit that these guys were good!

The Wonderbolts came in and took their turn, and they were good too, fast, tight strong; smashing through clouds that exploded on impact, raining thousands of tiny diamonds onto the crowds below. The panel of judges gave their scores to each team: The Rocketeers, thirty-five point five out of forty. The Wonderbolts, thirty-six!

The Rocketeers began off the second round; this time with freakishly big rockets, shaped like giant insects, fired from a central platform floating in the middle of the stadium and controlled by a team of very talented unicorns. The Rocketeers swerved every this way and that to try and avoid their pursuers, but for everyone they dodged, two more would pick up the chase.

The Rocketeers began fighting back, shooting live crossbows into the jet-propelled insects, which proved impotent against their thick carapaces until The Rocketeers learned that the only way to defeat them was to use their own speed against them. One Rocketeer with a pyro insect hot on his tail skidded between two pillars that were in front of the Wonderbolt viewing box; the pillars left just enough room for him, but the insect snagged and exploded, sending a tidal wave of sparks flashing in front of Stoner. Two more Rocketeers sped straight towards each other, fiery determined monsters chasing them. At the last possible instant the two Rocketeers pulled up and the monsters ran into each other, exploding in grand fashion. Stoner had never seen anything like this before!

By the time The Rocketeers had cleared the skies, several of them were singed from close calls, none the worse for their efforts, and the crowds were amazing, giving a standing ovation. Rainbow Dash was sweating hard, but put on a cool face all the same and led the Wonderbolts out for their counter-attack. It was good… but not as awesome as the Rocketeers, and Stoner wondered if Rainbow Dash’s sonicrainboom would be enough to counter whatever finale The Rocketeers had planne - HEY!

Stoner couldn’t believe his eyes, and the routine had just gotten to the point where the new stuff came in. Soarin and Spitfire were flying side by side when Soarin swerved to his right and knocked Spitfire’s wing with his own. To anyone else, it might have just seemed like a screw-up, but Stoner was sure it was intentional because in the split second he touched her wing, Soarin grabbed two of Spitfire’s primary feathers, twisted, and pulled them out!

Spitfire squeaked in pain, swerved to the left, and would have crashed straight into him if he hadn’t gained altitude with a quick flap and let her pass under him. Spitfire tried to regain control, but crashed through a thin piece of cloud and nearly smashed into the stone base of the stadium before Soarin swooped in and saved her.

By now the act was ruined; with Rainbow Dash turning around her head just in time to see Soarin catch Spitfire. The rest of the Wonderbolts ground to a halt when they saw what was going on; one of the referees flew up to take a closer look and then blew his whistle, ending the round.

“What happened!?” hissed Rainbow Dash, once everyone was back in the box.

“I don’t know.” Breathed Spitfire, turning red in shame.

“You almost crashed into me, and I saved your butt is what happened.” Spouted Soarin.

Spitfire shook her head; “Something hit me, I’m sure of it.”

“I was flying two wing lengths away from you” muttered Soarin, “I didn’t see anything.”

“It doesn’t matter!” growled Rainbow Dash, fireworks already exploding outside as The Rocketeers began their finale, “Spitfire, you’re my second for the last act; can you still do it?”

Spitfire extended her left wing, several of her primary feathers were gone, more were crumpled; even if she had time to preen the damaged ones, they would have to pull out a couple feathers on her right side to get them even. The difference wouldn't be enough to keep her from flying but it would cost her speed and accuracy in an already tight competition.

Rainbow Dash swore louder.

“What about me?” Offered Soarin, “I could take her place.”

Rainbow Dash shook her head, “You’re not fast enough.”

Soarin almost laughed evilly, “I can do it, I’m on fire today; remember what I did in the races?”

“You haven’t practiced this routine.”

“Yes I have,” lied Soarin, “I thought Spitfire’s routine sounded fun, so I’ve been practicing it in my own time, have every part of it down pat.”

“Really?” Dash’s eyes sparked in surprise for a moment, then turned cynical, “No, you still haven’t practiced it with the rest of the team.”

Outside the box, the sky went dark. Rainbow Dash moved out of the way, and Stoner could see an enormous airship had flown over the stadium and was blotting out the sun, and on the central platform was now one MASSIVE rocket. It took off, sending waves of heat that could be felt across the stadium, climbed into the air and exploded; for a moment it seemed anti-climactic, but only the outside layer was gone, while the core had unfolded into the shape of a flaming dragon which hurled towards the stadium snapping just above the heads of spectators, and was met in heroic fashion by The Rocketeers.

They attacked it like bees to a pegasus, but they couldn’t hurt something that big, and they knew it, but their attacks were enough to draw its attention away from the audience and onto themselves. With its focus won, The Rocketeers shot off, drawing the dragon ever higher until somewhere close to a thousand feet above the stadium it exploded causing a ball of fire big enough that for a moment it replaced the sun.

The dragon was gone, but from the wreckage fell ten flaming comets; when they were half way down, Stoner realized that they were The Rocketeers, lifeless, burning. The crowd watched in awed terror, Stoner held his breath, this might be the most amazing show he’d ever seen, but The Rocketeers had gone too far, and paid for it with their lives.

Even in death they were graceful, falling eyes closed with their legs and wings pointed to the air; unflinching as their uniforms burned around them until they crashed head first in unison into the soggy wet cloud they had launched their fireworks from. The clouds rippled and choked on the flaming morsels it had caught, melting away rapidly as a tear rolled down Stoner’s cheek. It was just a game, no one was supposed to… wait.

The clouds were now too soft to hold weight, but no charred corpses fell through. A series of fans around the stadium activated, drawing the gas cloud away, and in its place were twelve brave pegasi, flapping serenely in new, colorful, fireproof uniforms they must have been wearing underneath their other ones.

The crowd went nuts; even Stoner couldn’t contain himself anymore and blew a whistle to a scorching hot mare who was smiling smugly in the Wonderbolt direction. Rainbow Dash swore loudly.

“Well” muttered Soarin, “I guess so long as Spitfire can’t play I might as well go and tell the judges that we forefi-”

“Wait!” Rainbow Dash swallowed hard, “Are you sure you can take Spitfire’s place?”

“Absolutely.”

“Then let’s go.”

7 - and Ice

Stoner watched in anxious anticipation. He’d seen the Wonderbolts practice for their finale and knew that it wasn’t as good as the Rocketeer’s. He was worried that Soarin might mess everything up, taking a role he hadn’t trained for, but most of all, he was worried about Soarin.

The dude wasn’t thinking straight, but if he wasn’t willing to listen to him, there really wasn’t anything that Stoner could do. The chances of any of the other Wonderbolts listening to him closely enough for him to tell them about the amulet were slim, and the chances of Stoner making it all the way to Blueblood Manor by himself and getting Bluey to help him were even slimmer. With nothing else he could do, he watched as The Wonderbolts flew for the Canterlot Cup.

Music started playing as Fleet Foot, and Suprise brought two effigies of Celestia and Luna above the stadium and began rotating them like a vertical wheel while the rest of The Wonderbolts played underneath. Whenever Celestia was facing downwards they zipped and zagged, and then zigged each other’s zips; but whenever Luna looked down, they hid under clouds.

The music got faster; Luna turned around and stopped, unwilling to move until she had seen The Wonderbolts perform. Celestia crashed into her and the two alicorns fought, with Luna briefly gaining the upper hoof until Celestia called for aid. The Wonderbolts divided into three teams which spun three cyclones into one; a minute later they brought their cyclones together, merging them into one massive cyclone which rose up, catching Luna into its stormy grasp and banishing her into the distant storm cloud above.

The act paused for a moment, and then the music began again, now more ominous. The Storm cloud that had hovered over the stadium, once a pillar that was straight and tall, began to flatten, losing its altitude rapidly as it spread out to cover the sky. Lightning flashed downwards, with optical illusions making them appear to be striking much closer to the audience than they really were, as an armor-clad Nightmare Moon descended from the boiling sky, casting lightning bolts at the fake Celestia and casting her into a prison-like cloud of her own.

The music intensified, there was nothing The Wonderbolts could do against such a malevolent foe, but there were six ponies that could. There was a large cloud in the middle of the stadium, and the Wonderbolts flew in a star pattern towards it, slicing it into six equal pieces in a single blow. Each of the six was loaded with capsules of fast-acting dye, that spread every time the clouds were moved, as the Wonderbolts speed-sculpted them into blue, orange, pink, white, yellow and purple ponies.

In less than a minute, the sculptures would be finished, and then everything would be up to Rainbow Dash who would fly up through the bottom, and break the sound barrier just below Nightmare Moon. On either side of Dash’s course were two clouds, coated with a thin sheet of ice, containing two final, densely packed cloud statues of Celestia and Luna. If Dash broke the sound barrier right between them; the shockwave would dissipate the ice, and then the vortex of air rushing back would draw the two princesses together again, under the shining spotlight from the hole Dash would make in the top layer of clouds; but everything depended on her having the speed and timing.

On one of the early practice rounds, Dash had been able to go fast enough that The Princesses would be almost touching, and but that was before she’d lost some of her feathers practicing a few days ago. She needed all the support she could get, and so Spitfire was going to fly in front of her to act as a windbreaker so Dash could build up speed and conserve energy; then fall away at the last minute so Dash could do the Sonicrainboom. That’s what Soarin was meant to be doing now, except he wasn’t falling away.

Dash’s wings pumped madly, and she signaled for Soarin to fall out, Stoner knew that Soarin must have seen her through the tiny mirrors on his fore-hooves, but Soarin ignored her. Stoner bit his bottom lip. Soarin was still flying in front of Rainbow Dash a good three hundred yards after he was meant to fall back. Then, just when looked like she was about to swerve her course and take another lap before it was too late, Soarin back-flipped, and began flying face to face to Rainbow Dash and preventing her from veering off course.

If Dash broke the sound barrier now she could hurt, or maybe even kill him; he motioned furiously at him to fall away, but Soarin just flew a few inches closer. Dash swerved like she was going to abandon the act but then Soarin reached out and caught her, like a dancer, making it seem so smooth, and natural anyone else would have thought it was planned. He gave her a light pull to rematch her speed to his, spun her and then, at precisely the right moment; they both broke the sound barrier.

8 - Alone

Stoner couldn’t believe it, but the trail left of rainbow and turquoise blue was impossible to deny, the coverings of Luna and Celestia were shattered, Nightmare Moon was obliterated, the sky was torn open and the spin Soarin had taken Rainbow Dash through, gave the vortex a twist, so the Princesses even appeared to circle each other before embracing, placing their heads on each other’s shoulders.

Stoner’s jaw dropped; Rainbow Dash was the fastest pegasi in the world, everyone knew that, but now Soarin was even faster, and the crowd loved it. After a moment of shock, the applause began, and then the judges posted their scores, it was even louder. The Wonderbolts had won by half a point, Soarin had given them the victory.

Stoner knew he should be worried that his best friend in the world was being corrupted by dark magic, but seriously; Soarin had just won the Canterlot freakin Cup! This was a moment the two of them had dreamed of for years and yet… Stoner looked up, scanning the box that was set aside for the Wonderbolt’s close friends and family. Two empty seats stared back at him.
Mom and dad weren’t there.

Stoner felt his little heart inside his chest sag in disappointment. Spitfire’s parents were there; and her cousins. Misty, Blaze, Fire Streak all had their families there; even High Wind’s dad was there, in a wheelchair and oxygen mask with a doctor sitting beside him to make sure he didn’t die. Rainbow Dash had the whole front row reserved for her two parents, five friends from Ponyville, four foals, a baby dragon, and a flying turtle. The only people who didn’t have at least one parent there was Fleetfoot, who was an orphan but had her big sister there to support her… and Soarin.

Soarin had even reserved a third seat in case his parents didn’t want to sit together.

Stoner felt an invisible tear slide down his left cheek. Soarin could only remember as a young foal, times when mom and dad had been happy together. Stoner couldn’t remember those times at all because he was too young, but Soarin said that they’d only started fighting after Stoner came to live with them, but assured Stoner that it wasn’t his fault.

Stoner had spent most of his childhood with Soarin trying to think of ways to make mom and dad stop fighting all the time, but they kept on screwing up because they were big screw-ups back them. After Soarin became a Wonderbolt, he and Stoner felt like they could do anything, and so tried again at the biggest thing they both wanted; and so when Soarin got his first big figure paycheck, the first thing he did was send his parents on vacation.

Separate vacations.

Soarin and Stoner knew their parents were always fighting about getting in each other’s way and leaving junk around the house. They thought that maybe if they were just separated for a few weeks, they would actually start to miss each other and would be happy to see each other again. Then Soarin could buy them a bigger house so they wouldn’t be getting in each other’s way all the time.

The plan had seemed foolproof, except for the two fools who’d planned it.

When dad got on the cruise liner, some celebrity journalist recognized him as the father of the newest Wonderbolt and started stalking him with his camera. That by itself wouldn’t have been so bad, but then dad had too much to drink at the bar and fell prey to the whims of a hooker.

By the time mom and dad got home, the tryst was already in the celebrity magazines. Mom was furious, dad was defensive, and both of them were angry at Soarin. Mom was acting like Soarin had given his dad that spending money, knowing how he was going to spend it; and dad was mad at Soarin since none of the magazines would have cared about the hooker if Soarin hadn’t been a Wonderbolt. They got divorced, and that was one of the last times they ever spoke to each other… or Soarin.

He… never meant to break them apart; all Soarin had wanted was for them to have a nice holiday and then…

Soarin was upset for a long time, but Stoner helped him through it, just like he always had. He gathered together a band of other rocks and together they explained to Soarin why his parents were mad at him, but that was OK, because with them there, Soarin would never have to be alone.

Stoner waited; Soarin should be back any minute now to share this moment with Stoner, but he was still at the top of the stadium with Rainbow Dash. …Stoner waited… and waited… Soarin would be back any moment now… wouldn’t he? Wave Chill, who'd sat out the show thanks to his sprained wing, had still been able to limp out to join his team for the celebrations. He made one lap around the stadium, then stopped when he noticed Stoner, all alone on his pedestal. He was friends with Soarin; he knew how much he meant to him. After a moment picked him up; grinning goofily to himself like he was doing something silly, “Soarin’s gonna want to see you man; I’ll bring you to him.”

“Wave Chill, thank goodness you’re here; Soarin got jipped Thursday night; that hot fangirl he went home with knocked him out and stole his uniforms. Bluey helped us steal them back but then Soarin put on an amulet, and since then he’s been acting crazy!”

“Soarin really was fast” murmured Wave Chill almost to himself, “He must have really been working out in his spare time, eh?”

“Dude, please listen! Soarin’s being controlled by dark magic, that’s what’s giving him his speed, but it’s also made him turn evil; he intentionally pulled out some of Spitfire's feathers so he could take her place in the finale, he even peed in the pool for crying out loud! We need to get that amulet off of him before he does something he can’t undo. You have to help me!”

“And the way he grabbed Dash at the end” mused Wave Chill, “It’s like they’re a pair now. What about it Stoner, has Soarin been scoring the captain on the down low?”

“What? No dude, are you even listening to me!?”

Stoner tried again, but it was like Wave Chill couldn’t hear a single word he was saying. Then again the crowd was cheering really loud, Stoner guessed that they were drowning out his voice. Wave Chill punched through the cloud roof and hovered there for a moment, Rainbow Dash and Soarin were sitting together rather closely at the far end of the bank. Wave Chill began gliding towards them at a leisurely pace he wasn’t close enough to hear what they were saying, but Stoner had always been a really good lip reader and could see both their mouths moving.

Rainbow Dash looked like she was trying to be furious at Soarin for breaking rank, but was too excited to be doing a very good job, “You- you can do a sonicrainboom.” She panted,

Soarin leaned back, cool as a cucumber, brushing some of the cloud into a backrest, “Well I prefer to think of it as a Soarbang.”

“Right” nodded Rainbow Dash, still panting hard through that enormous grin, “Soarbang.”

Author's Note

Satellite story: Cute and Creepy

Having one pet rock is cute; it means you’re a sensitive guy, and showing it to someone shows trust in a relationship.

Having forty pet rocks is creepy, and should not be shown to your marefriend on a first date.

9 - Foals with Rainbow Dash

Wave Chill had given Stoner back to Soarin, who took him in a way that made Stoner feel like it was out of unwanted obligation, and then the three Wonderbolts smashed through the cloudbank to the redoubled cheers of the stadium. Usually, they were cheering for Rainbow Dash, but today, it was all about Soarin.

The team accepted the trophy and got their pictures taken with it, and after that, they could do what they wanted. Most of the team stayed out to do some extra gallivanting for the crowds; usually, Rainbow Dash would have stayed the longer than anyone doing tricks and barrel rolls until the stadium was almost empty; but today, after about ten minutes, she skulked off by herself when all eyes were on Soarin.

Funny, Stoner hadn’t taken her to be the pouting type.

Soarin had always had a crush on Rainbow Dash, but since putting on that amulet, this had turned into a weird, creepy obsession that caused Soarin to follow her, de-suit in record time and run into her as she was sneaking out the backdoor. “Hey, wait up!” Rainbow Dash turned, she didn’t look as happy to see Soarin this time, but at least she stopped. “I wanted to apologize.” Said Soarin evenly, “I know I should have talked to you before stealing the show, it’s just… I didn’t want to try and promise you anything I couldn’t deliver on, and I didn’t know I was ready until today.

I've been testing a new formula designed by one of the professors in Celestia’s School for gifted unicorns; it increases speed, stamina, reflexes; everything, and it’s perfectly legal. I wanted to tell you about this before, but… I couldn’t bear the idea of getting your hopes up and then letting you down again."

Rainbow Dash looked at him thoughtfully, as Soarin continued, "These last few weeks have been excruciating: late night purges, headaches, all smattered with intermediate bursts of speed and reflexes like you saw today; but when I woke up this morning, everything was crystal clear. I took some tests with the professor and passed them all with flying colors. I knew I was ready for this… but I didn’t have time to show you what I could do, and I knew you wouldn’t agree to change the script at the last moment without proof. Will you forgive me?”

Rainbow Dash hesitated for a long time; she seemed suspicious, particularly at how many words Soarin was using at one time, but then she smiled, and held out her hoof, “We won the last round by half a point. There is absolutely no question that your Soarbang won the Canterlot Cup, and I don’t argue with results.”

“Thank you” grinned Soarin happily, taking her hoof in his, “But I still feel like I need to make it up to you. Maybe I could take you out to dinner, and we could discuss you being the second participant in trialing the new formula.”

Rainbow Dash’s eyes flickered in anticipation, but only for a moment, “…Could we do that tomorrow?”

“What’s wrong with today?”

“I already have plans. It was my sister's birthday last week, and I wasn't able to be there because I was too busy preparing for The Cup. It’s been a long time since I’ve seen her, but I promised that as soon as I was free, we’d spend the day-”

Two quartets of hooves thundered across the pavement behind Soarin, who turned to see a filly and colt charging Rainbow Dash at full speed. The colt shied away and began to slow down about ten paces off, but the filly kept coming, wings buzzing excitedly until she hurled herself into Rainbow Dash’s waiting arms. “You were amazing!”

Rainbow Dash held the filly out at wings length, and rubbed her mane, “You too Scootaloo’ I reckon you must have flown the last five yards to get to me, now who's your friend?”

“They made a video game about you!” blurted out the colt, rearing excitedly.

Scootaloo giggled, “This is Button Mash, ever since they put your new game in the arcade me, Sweetie Bell and Apple Bloom have been playing it whenever we get the chance, but we need a fourth player to do team battles so we play with Button Mash and I always go with him because he so totally wins everything. Is it OK if he comes with us today?”

“Where are Sweetie Bell and Apple Bloom?”

Scootaloo shrugged, “Doing something with their sisters I guess.”

Rainbow Dash eyed Button Mash then back to Scootaloo with an impish grin, “So I tell you we can do whatever you want for your birthday; you don’t bring your friends, but you bring him. Is he-”

“-Is he your coltfriend?” Scootaloo asked suddenly, pointing towards Soarin.

Rainbow Dash faltered after being beaten to the punch, turning bright pink, “W-wha-no-Soarin and I are just friends!”

“Oh; sure.” Smirked Scootaloo, rolling her eyes, “I saw the way you two hugged during the finale, and you were up above the clouds way longer than you needed to be. What were you doing? Smooching?”

“No! We were just talking about… you know what, it’s none of your business!”

Soarin laughed confidently, “Well maybe we’re not a couple per se, but let’s just say that Rainbow Dash and I are having dinner tomorrow to discuss… well... adult things.”

"You're not going to propose to her are you?" asked a wide-eyed Button Mash.

"Not if he knows what's good for him he's not." growled Dash quickly.

"You're right" smiled Soarin, "If I was going to propose I'd need to do something way more romantic than just dinner; like maybe an airship cruise over the Alps of Prance or a snorkeling adventure in the reefs off the Carriagebean Islands." Rainbow Dash blushed suddenly, and Soarin laughed, “Come on Rainbow Dash, what don’t we H-U-M-O-R them this one time?”

Wait; what did Soarin just say? Both the foals looked as confused as Stoner, making him feel like he wasn’t a total idiot, but normally he could understand everything Soarin said. That amulet wasn’t just making him fast and evil; he was getting smarter.

Rainbow sighed turning to Scootaloo, “Let's get lunch. I’m buying.”

"I'm in," said Soarin quickly.

"Wait, who invited you?"

"You did; just now."

Dash rolled her eyes, and Scootaloo prodded her playfully on the shoulder, "Come on Rainbow Dash; you're not going to leave your coltfriend behind; are you?"

Dash huffed, "Fine he can come. Now can we eat?"

“Of course!” agreed Scootaloo, “Right after you give Soarin a kiss.”

“What!?”

“You know, just a little something to show him you’re interested.” Teased Scootaloo; prodding her in the shoulder.

Rainbow Dash made a face like she’d just been told to take her medicine, swiped her mouth near Soarin’s cheek, without touching it, and made a kissing sound. “There, it's done; let’s go eat.”

“You call that a kiss?” challenged Button Mash.

“I couldn't agree more.” Chirped Soarin, stepping forwards; in one fluid movement he stepped forwards, swept Dash's hooves out from under her and then caught her face up, and planted a kiss on her lips so deep that it caused both foals jaws to drop and even Stoner to blush a little. Soarin balanced both their weights with just one wing, supporting Dash behind the wings and neck with his hooves, while his other wing made several fast laps from her chest to her flank in the few seconds that he held her. Rainbow Dash jolted when he first grabbed her, but then failed to resist, her eye’s fluttering momentarily before Soarin pulled back, flipping her back to her hooves, “Now we can go eat. I’m buying.”

10 - Mr. Evil

Scootaloo and Button Mash were so cute on the way to lunch; whispering and laughing to each other behind Soarin and Rainbow Dash. Stoner did think it was a bit strange though that Scootaloo didn’t really look like Rainbow Dash… and she couldn’t fly. Rainbow Dash was a great flier; any sister of hers would at least be a good flier, wouldn’t she?

As they made their way to the buffet on Sweet Grass Road; Rainbow Dash kept giving Soarin these looks, when she thought no one was watching, like she was curious… and not in a careful way. It made Stoner uneasy; Soarin had had a crush on Rainbow Dash since the best young fliers competition, and Stoner had helped him plan ways to woo her, but Rainbow Dash deserved the real Soarin. The thought of the guy Soarin was now scoring her just made Stoner’s skin feel like it was crawling – wait no; Stoner’s skin was crawling, there was a fly on him! A big one!

“Soarin, help! I’m under attack! Get it off before it lays eggs in my mane!” Soarin didn’t do anything; and the fly continued to saunter over Stoner, scraping his skull with its mouth and feet. Realizing he was on his own, Stoner thought fast, “Rrrrribbit.” He growled trying to imitate a frog. The fly didn’t move. “Rrribbet!” the fly buzzed off, and Stoner gave a laugh of triumph, but the excitement was short lived. Soarin had heard he was under attack… and he didn’t help him.

When they got to the buffet, they split up; Soarin grabbed a plate and started heaping massive piles of food on it; mashed potatoes, apple crumble, fried rice, and veggies stacked on top of each other until there was no more space, and then Soarin grabbed another plate. “Can I have some lemonade?” asked Stoner, “And a little pile of breadcrumbs to go with it? I’m actually really hungry after watching you flip out all night long.”

Soarin grabbed a spatula, cut a huge piece of lasagna and heaped it on the plate. “Are you kidding man? There’s no way that I’m going to eat all of that!” Soarin grabbed some oat cakes and piled them on as Stoner realized that the second plate wasn’t for him. No problem, Soarin must be hungry after doing all that racing and door-knocking and cow-tipping; he needed his food and would get Stoner something to eat next.

Soarin finished stacking his second plate and took them to a table that was set for four. Stoner waited for him to set a fifth place, and then go back for the breadcrumbs and lemonade; but instead, he sat down, doused his oat cakes in honey and tore into them. “Soarin,” asked Stoner sheepishly, “I-I’m hungry can you get me something to eat now?” Soarin took a bite of his apple crumble, smacking his lips deliciously. “Soarin!”

Soarin stopped eating; gave an aggravated grunt and stood up; but instead of going back to the food bar, he marched into the bathroom, tore open the flaps to his saddlebag and snatched Stoner out, holding him at eye level. “Shut. Up.”

“But… Soarin we always-”

“I’m not feeding you anything, and I’m not taking you out of your bag until I get home. I’m thinking clearer than I ever have before, and you know what I’ve realized? I don’t need you.”

“…Dude… You don’t mean that.”

“Everything I try to do, you keep getting in the way. Remember that night right after Rainbow Dash became a Wonderbolt; she came up to my room, and she was gonna pay out, but then I started introducing her to you and the other rocks, and then she left; it’s not gonna happen again. I’m not putting you on the table, I’m not feeding you, and I’m finally gonna get down with Dash.”

“Not if you’re acting like this much of a jerk you’re not!”

“Oh really?” grinned Soarin getting closer, “She thinks I have the formula for unlimited speed and stamina; what will she give me for a chance at that? What won’t she give me?”

“Sooner or later she’s going to catch on that you only got fast after you started wearing that amulet everywhere you…” Stoner double checked, but the amulet was gone. All he could see was a barely distinguishable silver chain, camouflaged against Soarin’s neck. “Where is it?”

Soarin chuckled then held Stoner behind his head and lifted up his mane and showed him the amulet, hidden under Soarin’s bushy mane at the base of his neck. Stoner felt a tear well up in his eye, “But… that’s my place! All through school whenever the teacher said you couldn’t have me with you in class, that’s where I hid.”

Soarin looked him in the eye, saliva dripping evilly from his mouth; “It’s Ali’s place now.”

Stoner fought back rage and retorted; “Rainbow Dash ain’t a hooker! She’s not gonna sleep with you just because you might make her fly faster.”

“You really are stupid aren’t you? Just like Rainbow Dash. The mare is going to take anything I give her so long as she thinks it will make her fly like me. Anything. If it makes her horny instead of fast she’ll understand, and go right back for the next shot; especially if I put something in there to screw with her thinking. Even when I officially outfly her and become the new captain of the team, it will just make her more eager to get the speed I have.”

“Dude that’s evil!”

Soarin looked Stoner in the eye, his eyes were glowing red and gave an evil chuckle, “Then call me Mr. Evil. Mhmmwahaahaha-hahahaha-mwhahahaha-“ He stopped laughing suddenly, double checked the mirror and then spun around to look at the little colt standing in the doorway, staring at him. “Well what are you looking at!? Huh?”

The colt scampered out, Soarin shoved Stoner back into his saddlebags; but he put him in upside down, and in the left bag which didn’t have any windows. A few seconds later, the bag began jostling, and Stoner once again smelled the food of the buffet and heard Soarin begin devouring his meal.

Stoner and Soarin had been best friends since they met, but sometimes that meant Stoner needed to call him out on something that he’d done wrong. Soarin needed to be stopped; for his own sake, for Rainbow Dash’s sake, and for the sake of the world… and it was up to Stoner to do it.

Author's Note

Tell me if you think Soarin's plans are a bit too dark for a sad comedy; but I was feeling I needed some sort stakes that people would actually care about. Needless to say, Soarin won't succeed, thanks to the heroic deeds of a certain pet rock.

11 - Twitch

Stoner was airsick.

He was on his head bumping up and down in a dark, stuffy saddlebag. From the feel of things, he guessed Soarin was hovering in little circles, presumably around Rainbow Dash and the foals; but then again, that might just be the shifting in Stoner's stomach. Due to the constant shifts in direction, Stoner had no idea where he was or where they were going, except overhearing Soarin say that he did not want to see a movie. Everyone else sounded like muffled drawls.

The air in there was getting increasingly dense, like breathing into a paper bag only worse; but when Soarin turned round a bend, Stoner rolled and managed to catch the point of his hoof against the seam of the saddlebag and began rubbing up and down with each slow wing beat Soarin took, gradually opening a hole for him to see and breathe through. It took ages to wear the hole; seriously it was fifteen minutes at least, but when he finally managed to cut through, all he saw was a solid wall of popcorn.

Lots and lots of popcorn!

Stoner couldn’t believe his eyes, and wondered if being trapped in the bag had caused him to hallucinate; then Soarin took a step back, and Stoner saw that they were at the snack bar in the movie theater. Soarin ordered two small popcorns and sodas for the foals, a medium for Rainbow Dash and a jumbo for himself. Stoner suggested that he should get something bigger for the others so he wouldn’t look greedy, but Soarin ignored him. Then again, Stoner was surprised Soarin wanted the jumbo at all; he’d just eaten a five-course meal less than an hour ago, and already he was ravenous.

“Can… can I have a kids size popcorn, that’s like breadcrumbs only better?”

Soarin ignored him, and instead grumbled something to himself about needing to see a little girl’s movie.

“You insisted on coming on a birthday date for a filly.” Reminded Stoner, “What did you expect?”

Soarin grumbled some more and bought five candy bars. Wait, five? Stoner’s heart leapt, Soarin had gotten one for him, maybe he wasn’t completely gone after all. A minute later, Rainbow Dash showed up with the foals in hoof, and Soarin distributed the popcorns and sodas… but not the candy bars; he kept them hidden in the fold under his wing. He didn’t even offer one to Rainbow Dash.

A few minutes later and the five of them were in the theatre; four of them waiting patiently for the movie to start, Soarin waiting impatiently. He kept shifting his weight, now forwards, then to the left, and back again; scratching, standing up, sitting back down and then repeating like it was some kind of twisted dance. The only good thing about it was that in one of his innumerable twists and bends, Stoner managed to pull himself into an upright position.

After a few minutes of checking the clock every fifteen seconds and spending the rest of his time ogling at Rainbow Dash, the ads started. Usually, these calmed Soarin right down and held his attention until the movie, but now they just made him worse. He kept chattering quietly to himself like he was arguing with each advertiser, then louder as they droned on and he was asking where the movie was, stopping only long enough to shove one candy bar after another into his mouth.

The movie started, and Stoner’s last hope that Soarin would manage to get a grip on himself ended in disappointment. Soarin kept fidgeting with everything he could think of, scratching his butt with his left hoof and shoveling huge hooffulls of popcorn into his mouth with the other while he kicked the back of the seat of the person in front of him. A few kernels fell into Stoner’s bag, and he began pecking at them ravenously, but soon lost his appetite out of worry with the sinking realization that Soarin really was trying to relax, and couldn’t settle down.

Ten minutes into the movie, Soarin got up and left.

Two and a half hours later Rainbow Dash and the foals came out of the cinema, Scootaloo beaming, Dash smiling and Button Mash looking a little bored until he noticed the pinball machine had a new high score to it: Soarin W. He walked over for a closer look, and noticed that Tetris had also been rebranded, and so had pac-colt.

Button’s eyes opened wider as he began following a trail of high scores that led to the end of the isle where Soarin was hoof mashing the last console into submission. A look of cold determination settled over Button’s face as another high score appeared. Without ever saying a word, he took a pouch of bits from his saddlebag and traded the entire bag for game tokens.

12 - Be Careful What You Say

Pow-swipe-stab-fireball-fireball-smashkick-shield-counterstrike-jab-hammerthrow.

Hard sweat, teeth clenched, eyes focused and hooves racing in disciplined, controlled strikes. Soarin, in stark contrast to Button Mash, was flailing about like a mad horse; laughing with delight every time his minotaur avatar bludgeoned Button Mash’s unicorn with his enormous hammer and then howling in rage when Mash caught him with a lightning bolt that sent Soarin tumbling over the edge.

They were also playing air hockey.

Stoner wasn’t sure if moving the games around was against the arcade rules. Maybe they were letting Soarin get away with it because he was a Wonderbolt… or maybe because the one time the manager came and looked at them, Soarin glanced at him in a way that made Stoner want to pee himself.

Soarin was using both front hooves to play Super Smash Bronies and his right wing for the hockey mallet. Button Mash used one hoof for each game, somehow using his elbow as a second hoof for Smash Bronies like some kind of ambidextrous prodigy.

Rainbow Dash and Scootaloo had played a few of the dance games together down the aisle, but for the last twenty minutes had just been watching Soarin and Button Mash smash heads in two or three games at once. Rainbow Dash smiled and then leaned down and whispered to Scootaloo, “Do you think either of them would notice if we left?”

“Sure we would” Quipped Mash, deflecting the hockey puck and then throwing a fireball, “You’re helping with emotional support.”

“Or maybe guys just perform better when they’ve got girls to show off for; right Soarin?” Soarin didn’t notice he was so hacking at the buttons to make his minotaur do a barrel roll.

Scootaloo grinned up at Rainbow Dash, “I think I have the better date.”

“You’re the only one with a date.” Growled Rainbow Dash, “Soarin, it’s not working out between us; I’m breaking up with you.”

Soarin snapped his head round, “What?” BANG The hockey puck shot into Soarin’s goal. “Huh?” POW Soarin’s minotaur fell into lava.

“Scootaloo and I need to get in a flying lesson before the days out. You boys stay here and play your games.”

Soarin slammed the hockey puck towards Button Mash who caught it under his mallet, “You two are coming back so we can do something together later, right?”

“Sure” smiled Rainbow Dash, “What time?”

“What time does the arcade close?”

“Maybe we could come;” Suggested Soarin, pointing at Button Mash suspiciously. “I could give him a flying lesson.”

Rainbow Dash laughed at both of them; picked up Scootaloo and flew away. “…Soarin.” Said Mash hesitantly.

“Yeah?”

Mash shot the puck into Soarin’s goal, and then slammed a button on Smash Bronies which exploded Soarin’s minotaur, winning both games simultaneously, “You lose.”

Soarin flipped. Stoner knew Soarin never like losing, but this was something else; the way he stomped his hooves and yelled a brief and vicious tirade of profanity which Button Mash weathered with a relaxed smile, “If you really don’t like falling so much, you shouldn’t keep letting yourself get thrown off cliffs.”

Soarin picked up the entire air hockey table and rammed it through the Smash Bronies console. Button Mash stared at the carnage as if Soarin had just killed a baby, but before he could scream Soarin had grabbed him with one hoof under his ribcage and was lifting him in mock imitation of the way Rainbow Dash had carried away Scootaloo just moments earlier. “Time for your flying lesson little earth-pony.”

13 - Skies of Terror

Rainbow Dash was flying nice and slow, giving Scootaloo support when she needed it but for the most part, letting her buzz forwards on her own power. That is until Soarin came whizzing past them at breakneck speeds, balancing Button Mash on one hoof, “Keep up slowpokes!”

Scootaloo regained her balance and then shouted for Dash to give chase, to which she readily agreed. A backward glance by Stoner showed Rainbow Dash hot on their trail; her face showing a playful determination like she thought this was a game. Stoner felt a cold lump rising in his throat.

This was no game.

Button Mash’s little hat buzzed madly and then went flying off his head, but Soarin didn’t go back for it as they raced through the maze-like back alleys of Canterlot until Dash and Scootaloo cornered them in an alley, forcing Soarin to fly straight up into open air. Soarin slowed, and Rainbow Dash caught him up a few seconds later; looking concernedly at a pale, airsick Button Mash who was holding onto Soarin for all he was worth, “You OK Mash?”

“He-he… he killed Smash Bronies.”

“Lousy joystick came off in my hoof, and the manager made me pay for an entire new console” sighed Soarin, “Can you believe that? Now tell me; how do you give a flying lesson?”

Rainbow Dash paused uncertainly, but Scootaloo giggled, “Rainbow Dash always drops me and sees how long I can hover.”

“Sounds like fun.” Soarin flipped Mash upside down and swiped him off his arm, smiling as he watched the foal fall screaming for several seconds before swooping down to catch him and bringing him back up. “That was fun.”

“Dude; that was totally inappropriate!” scolded Stoner.

“Was it really Button Mash?” Dash asked.

Button Mash, too scared to speak, tried to shake his head, but Soarin grabbed him behind the skull, at the base of the mane, and forced him to nod; like some kind of demented dark puppet master.

“Don’t do that man!” Warned Stoner, “If the kid doesn’t want to fly, let him go; we could get in trouble!”

“Just be careful” Cautioned Rainbow Dash, “It looks like it’s his first time flying, so try not to freak him out too much.”

Scootaloo snickered, “Sometimes Rainbow Dash throws me to see how far I can fly.”

Before Dash could protest, Soarin had taken off; gained altitude and momentum and then hurled Button Mash with all his might. The foal held his breath as he soared towards his apex, shouted when he began falling which broke into a full-throated scream when he passed over the walls of Canterlot, and the drop beneath him went from three hundred to four thousand feet. Soarin flew upside down next to him, casually keeping pace. “How are you holding up?”

“Let me go! Let me go!”

“Me? I’m not touching you.”

“Put me on the ground!”

“That’s where you’re going.” Explained Soarin mockingly, “The ground!”

“Soarin! Knock it off!” ordered Stoner.

“Lift-me-up-lift-me-up-lift-me-up!”

“So you want to go up now?” mused Soarin, “You know that’s not where the ground is, right? So which is it; do you want to go up or down?”

“Up!”

Soarin caught Button Mash under his arms, and then slowly decreased their speed over a few seconds and then brought them to a hover; “Don’t…” Panted Button clinging around Soarin’s neck; “Don’t…ever not do that again.”

“Don’t… not do it again.” Pondered Soarin thoughtfully, “So you want me to do it… OK.” Soarin rocketed up and away from the Canterhorn, climbing a few hundred feet in the space of a few seconds and then threw Button Mash a second time; who trailed yellow water behind him as his bladder emptied itself in terror.

Soarin wove his way unscathed through Button Mash’s yellow water, caught him, and prepared to throw him again! “If you really don’t like falling so much, you shouldn’t keep letting yourself get thrown off cliffs!”

“Dude he’s terrified! Let him go!”

“SOARIN!”

Stoner looked up in relief and saw Rainbow Dash racing towards them; the look on her face giving Stoner hope that she finally understood the gravity of the situation. Undaunted, Soarin hurled Button Mash a third time, Dash went to catch him, but Soarin grabbed a nearby cloud and threw it into her face. She faltered, only for a second, but that was long enough for Soarin to sandwich her between two more clouds and then spin her; throwing her completely off balance. By the time she had regained any sense of direction; Soarin had snatched Button Mash and disappeared into a dense maze of clouds where it would be almost impossible to track them.

“Dude; stop before it’s too late!”

Soarin spun rapidly with Button Mash, and then pivoted him a fourth time, feeling his tiny joints pop with tension and his face screw up with pain as well as panic. Stoner knew that Soarin was too far out of control; he was having too much fun and, left to himself, he would continue this game of catch and throw until he killed Button Mash. Stoner couldn’t rely on Rainbow Dash; if anyone was going to stop Soarin from something he’d regret for the rest of his life, he needed to do it himself.

As Soarin prepared to throw Button Mash for the fifth time, Stoner braced himself. When Soarin threw him, braking sharply; Stoner leaped forwards head-butting the tear he’d etched out earlier, forcing the hole wider.

As Soarin began climbing again, Stoner jumped back into the saddlebag again and waited until Soarin slowed down to catch Button Mash, and then ran forwards and doubled the size of the tear with a punch from his muscular granite arm. “Hold on Button Mash! I’m coming!”

When Soarin started climbing again, Stoner slid back inside the saddlebag one last time; rapidly recalling everything Soarin had ever taught him about flying. Soarin threw Button Mash, and when he stopped, Stoner plunged forwards; through the hole, out of the saddlebag, and into open air.

As Stoner reached his apex, he too began to fall; tearing like lightning through one cloud after another; looking for Soarin and knowing he only had one shot. Soarin had flown several stories of cloud down and was looking up for Button Mash so he could catch him again.

Stoner charged him from the same direction as the sun. There was a flash as Stoner’s shadow passed over Soarin’s face. Soarin spun around to see what was there, and that was all the opportunity Stoner needed. As he closed the final inches, Stoner bellowed out a mighty war-cry, “Higghhhhya!” as he pivoted with all his might and kicked Soarin between the eyes; knocking him unconscious.

14 - Brothers Forever

Rock… was a rock.

He didn’t have a name because he didn’t need one; no one ever talked to him. He lived near a waterfall that fell into a lake deep in the woods, but he’d never seen it; he didn’t have any eyes. All he could do was listen, and he wasn’t very good at listening because his ears were full of moss.

He’d lived here for as long as he could remember, year in, year out, with nothing to do. In summer he would bake bone dry under the blistering sun, and the lake’s cool water would always be just beyond his reach. In winter he would be buried by snow, and couldn’t even shiver to get warm. The rest of the time, Rock was surrounded by dank moss that grew up everywhere around him, and sometimes the birds pooped on him as he waited for something to happen. He didn’t know what he was waiting for, but he knew that this wasn’t what he wanted from his life.

Then one day, Rock felt a hoof close around him. At first, he was afraid that some evil pony was about to hurl him into the lake and drown him forever, but this hoof was gentle and carried him a short distance before placing him on a comfortable tree stump. Then there was a pause, and Rock was beginning to wonder if the pony had gone away, and then he felt the edge of something scraping against his face. It didn’t hurt, but he could feel the moss peeling off until his whole face was bare; then came a brush to wipe away all the little pieces of grit, and make sure his face was dry.

Then Rock felt something wet press against the side of his face and groaned in repugnance, thinking another bird had just pooped on him. He tried to shake the wet thing off, but it held firm and a few seconds later came the most amazing moment of Rock’s life. The hoof that had been covering his face pulled back, and for the first time in his life, he could see.

An earth pony foal was leaning over him; his short green mane sitting on top of his small gray face with keen brown eyes that stared at Rock like a master craftsman studying his work. Slowly, he picked up another googly eye from his kit, dabbed the back of it with some glue and then stuck it on the other side of Rock’s face. Rock was confused; wondering if something was wrong with the eye he’d just gotten if the colt thought he needed another one, but when the foal took his hoof away the second time, it was like seeing everything all over again because now he could see in three dimensions.

The foal stared him in the eyes for a minute and then gave a satisfied smile; took out the butter knife he’d used earlier and began to carefully scrape away the moss that was stuck in Rock’s ears. He stopped every few strokes to wipe away the loose moss with his brush and then began again until both of Rock’s ears were clean; and then he did Rock’s back and head, leaving only one clean and stylish stripe between Rock’s ears.

The colt looked at him one more time, turning him over like he wasn’t quite satisfied with his work yet, and then a light lit up in his eyes as he reached back into his kit and drew out a large yellow crayon. By the time he was finished drawing Rock’s new mouth, both of them were grinning from ear to ear as Rock drew the first deep breath of his life. “Perfect,” said the colt, grinning triumphantly, “You’ll be perfect.”

Rock wasn’t sure what the colt was talking about, but it didn’t matter. His whole life he’d just been average at everything he’d ever tried. To be perfect at anything would be a dream come true. The colt put Rock in his saddlebag and headed off; Rock didn’t know where they were going, but after his transformation, he felt like dancing, and jingling around at the bottom of the colt’s bag, allowed him to do just that.

After a while; the colt’s hooves went from trotting to a slow walk so he wouldn’t make any sound, and then stopped. The foal took Rock from the saddlebag and showed him they were right in front of a tent; he held his hoof up to his mouth for silence, and then carefully began unzipping the tent before – “Moulder?”

The colt spun around, dropping Rock, and they both faced a white pegasus, with a wavy blue mane and a kind smile; “Aww Soarin!”

“I woke up, and you weren’t there, what are you doing out so early?”

“I… was making you a birthday present.” Moulder sighed, picking up Rock and holding him out to Soarin, “I wanted to surprise you.” Soarin gave an excited grin, taking Rock in his wings and turning him over a few times before a look of confusion settled over his face, “He’s a pet rock.” Moulder explained.

“What do I do with it?”

“You talk to him; he keeps you company.”

Soarin laughed, ruffling Moulder’s mane with a wing, “That’s what I have you for silly.”

“Yea, but I’m not always going to be around.” Moulder explained, “You’re going into middle school next year, and I know you’ll be lonely without me. He can keep you company when I’m not there.”

Soarin looked back to Rock, newfound appreciation sinking into his smile. “I love him.”

Love? Rock had never been loved by anyone before, not even other rocks.

“You need to give him a name,” instructed Moulder.

“Hmmm” Soarin held Rock up next to his brother’s head, “He looks a little bit like you.”

“Does not!”

“Yea he does.” Chuckled Soarin. “I’m going to name him… Stoner.”

Stoner blinked and then felt his smile grow a little wider when he realized what had just happened. For the first time in his life, he had a name!

Moulder snatched Stoner back, stood up to drape one arm around Soarin and turned Stoner round to face them, “Hi Stoner; I’m Stone Moulder, and this here is Soarin; we’re brothers and Soarin is the best big brother and the best flier in the whole world and today is his twelfth birthday!”

Soarin chuckled and snatched Stoner with his wing, draping the other around Moulder, “Right now we’re camping in in Winsome Falls, and the reason this is a weekend trip is because tomorrow is Stone Moulder’s birthday, he’s turning eight! He’s the best younger brother in the whole world, and I’m bigger than him, but he is way smarter.”

Stoner nodded eagerly as the two colts began taking turns talking; each telling him things about the other. He didn’t know much about ponies, but even he could tell that there was something special about these two brothers, and now Stoner was like a third.

Mom and dad woke up a short while later, and Stoner learned that mom was a pegasus, but dad was an earth pony. That didn’t seem to matter though as dad restarted the campfire and mom cooked breakfast; during which both colts shared little bits of their meals with Stoner. Soarin got a couple of little presents from mom and dad, a compass and a hammer, (though Stoner could tell that Soarin liked him the best); and then the whole family piled into a small raft and went speeding down a river, which was even more fun than it sounded.

By sundown, the family was tired and achy, but in a happy sort of way. Sitting around a campfire that had been used to cook dinner and then built into a pyre much larger than it needed to be, just because the foals wanted to; dad got out a guitar and began strumming it, and mom sang along. Neither of them were very good, but that didn’t matter, the foals still loved it. They seemed like the perfect family.

About midnight everyone had crawled off to bed, including Stoner. Soarin was snoring within a few minutes, but Moulder stayed awake, tossing and turning until he picked up Stoner and took him outside and began telling him honestly how worried he really was for Soarin:

Stone Moulder didn’t understand why but, around here, earth ponies like dad, and pegasi like mom, didn’t usually get along. Soarin was one of the only pegasi in his school, and the only non-earth pony in his class; and mom and dad couldn’t afford to send him to the classy, private school for pegasi. This meant that tended to get teased a lot, and the fact that his grades were so low enough that he’d been held back a year didn’t help. Until now Soarin had spent most of lunchtime and recess with Stone Moulder, but he wouldn’t be able to do that next year.

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

Stoner Moulder was tired the next day from talking to Stoner all night and wanted to sleep in, but that was fine. Soarin crept out, helped mom and dad make breakfast, and then all three of them crowded into the little tent and helped each other serve Moulder breakfast in bed.

Dad gave Moulder a new art kit for his birthday, mom gave him a coloring book, and then Soarin asked him to come outside so he could give him his present. Moulder picked up Stoner and followed Soarin who then kneeled over and told Moulder to hop on his back, and he’d give him a ride. Based on the practiced ease with which he jumped onto his brother’s shoulders, Stoner guessed that rides weren’t anything unordinary, but from the small yip of glee he did it with, showed that they were still special.

“Be careful!” Mom called after them.

All three brothers grinned.

Up and up they went, and Stoner began to feel a little bit queasy being the first time he’d ever flown, but Moulder gave him a reassuring squeeze as Soarin slowly gaining altitude with heavy beats remarkably strong for a colt his age. For a long time, all he did was slowly spiral upwards, and Stoner began wondering if this was all they were going to do; but when the lake that had been Stoner’s entire world just yesterday was spread out beneath them, looking no bigger than a puddle he might take a bath in. Soarin slowed to a hover, taking a few moments to catch his breath; “Ready?”

“Ready,” Moulder answered boldly, tightening his grip.

The world span.

Stoner didn’t know which way was up, or where they were going, but they were moving super-fast as clarion laughter rang around him. The crock-screw dive ended, and Soarin pulled up, leaving Stoner reeling, and they began zig-zagging over the river, casting a fearsome shadow which scattered the flocks of birds that used to poop on Stoner back when he was just Rock.

Soarin was quickly losing the altitude he’d fought for earlier, and now the tops of some of the tallest trees were beginning zipping by them. A few hundred yards ahead of them was a bend in the river; if Soarin kept flying straight they would race into the forest, but if he turned to the left, there was a wide empty meadow he could land in.

“Don’t go in the trees!” Mom shouted from somewhere behind.

“What did she say?” asked Soarin jokingly.

“She said ‘go in the trees.’” Smirked Moulder.

Soarin did, and Stoner got a taste of the true extent of Soarin’s flying prowess. He was incredible! Loping over a big branch, swerving between two trunks and then narrowly missing a hanging vine; Moulder laughed. Soarin grinned. Stoner fell.

For a moment, all Stoner could think of was the pain in his side from where he’d landed. His eyes teared up a little, but it passed after a moment before he could breathe again, and became aware of two colts lying a few dozen paces in front of him; one of whom was laughing. “What a landing!” grinned Soarin, sitting up, brushing dirt and twigs off his wings, “Mom’s gonna be so mad but it was so worth it, right buddy?”

Stone Moulder didn’t answer, “... Buddy?”

Soarin scampered over to Moulder and nudged him, “Come on, let’s get out of here; race you back to the creek?” He didn’t move.

“Nice try” chuckled Soarin, “You’re not going to fool me like this again. Up you come.” Soarin grabbed Moulder’s front hooves and tried to pull him into a sitting position; his body rose up, but his head just flopped back in a way it… wasn’t… meant to.

“WHAT DID YOU DO!!!”

Mom came tearing into the glade and Soarin jumped back like she was going to smack into him, but she stopped when she reached Stone Moulder. She tried stretching him out straight and when she saw he wasn’t breathing she pinched his muzzle blew into his mouth and then pressed on his chest, but nothing happened except his head slumping to one side.

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

A colt was screaming. It wasn’t the pained, phantom scream that never came from Stone Moulder. It wasn’t the long sob of despair that finally shook Soarin to the core. It was Button Mash, clinging to one of Soarin’s lifeless hind hooves, screaming as the space that separated them from the earth fell to under a thousand feet; and Stoner surfed precariously on Soarin’s muzzle, jumping up and down to wake up his older brother; “Soarin! Wake up buddy, or else everybody’s gonna die!”

Eight hundred feet.

Stoner didn’t have any more time; Soarin never woke up from a nap without remembering what had happened, the memory would be more than enough to break to amulet’s hold over him but he needed to wake up and they only had five hundred feet left. Stoner jumped one last time on Soarin’s flaying muzzle, tripped and began sliding down Soarin’s face. Soarin’s eyes creaked open slightly, when Stoner’s mane brushed over them, just in time for Stoner to stare his brother in the eye for one waking moment; “Don’t you let go.”

Stoner fell, just as Soarin’s head jerked upwards catapulting Stoner into the air; but his trajectory was tracked, and Soarin came dashing after him, catching him in one perfect swing that sent warmth ricocheting from the top of Stoner’s head to the bottom of his hoof. Button Mash screamed one last time and braced for impact, but Soarin was already there, catching him with fifty feet to spare and spreading his wings, bringing the three of them into a smooth, spiral landing onto the soft grass.

Soarin… didn’t know what to say. Button Mash was unhurt, but the moment he hit the ground he collapsed into a fetal position. The reality of the last day began setting in; how he’d acted… and what he’d nearly done, “I… I’m-sorry.”

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

Button Mash didn’t want to be comforted, so Soarin left. It which was just as well; right now, Soarin wasn’t in a position to comfort anybody, not even himself. That was why Stoner was there for him; just like he always had been, “It’s OK Soarin, Button Mash will be alright; please don’t cry.”

Soarin cried anyway, hugging Stoner closer to his heaving, sobbing chest as he curled into the fetal position on a small cloud. It was much the same position he’d been in the day he’d killed Stone Moulder; mom had yelled at him that it was his fault, and when he tried to get close to Stone Moulder, she’d hit him. When dad had found them there was even more yelling; and when the blood started trickling out of Moulder’s mouth, Soarin couldn’t take it anymore.

He picked up Stoner, flew off, and found a cloud, just like this one, where he lay down to watch the sunset… and rise, and set and rise again. To keep himself from crying he talked to Stoner. It had been the first time that Stoner ever started talking back.

Whenever you were bad, you needed to sit on the naughty cloud until mom said you could play again, and Soarin knew that he had been very bad. It had been two days before mom found him. She hugged him and said that she loved him, but after that day Soarin was never sure if she meant it. Dad hardly said anything and, after that day, mom and dad were always fighting.

“It… it almost... happened again.” Heaved Soarin slowly still clutching Stoner to his chest, “How could I have been so stupid?”

“It wasn’t your fault Soarin.” Soothed Stoner quietly, “It was that thing around your neck; all this trouble started when you first put it on.”

Soarin sat up, gripping the amulet as he stared at it; “How dare you?” he growled accusingly, “What were you trying to accomplish?”

Stoner felt the amulet pulse with dark energy again, as if it was trying to justify itself; but this time Soarin didn’t listen. He snapped the chain, and hurled it with all his might and then the two brothers sat back, watching it plop weakly into the lake far below.

A deep exhaustion began settling over Soarin as the last few days finally caught up with him, but a deeper sorrow drove away any ability to rest, so Soarin began crying again, and then lifted his left wing into his muzzle like he was about to blow his nose. “Don’t do that man!” yelled Stoner, “You need your wings to fly us out of here; and you know you can’t fly with mucus sticking your feathers together!” It was a terrible habit that had been born on the first cloud and had taken Stoner and Soarin three years to break. Soarin sobbed even harder and prepared to blow, causing Stoner to quickly change his tone, “Button Mash is alive. It didn’t happen like it did last time.”

“It shouldn’t have happened at all.” Groaned Soarin, “I... never… carry foals.”

“I know. For the longest time, you didn’t even want to carry yourself; and do you remember what happened when you stopped flying and tried to live like an earth pony.”

“I got so fat.”

“And I needed to drag you through pegasus fat camp to get you back in shape; I don’t want to go through all that again. You were made to fly; sure you’ve screwed up plenty of times, but that doesn’t mean you’re allowed to give up! What happened to Moulder was almost twelve years ago and-”

“Eleven years; one hundred eighty-seven days.” Corrected Soarin.

“Right.” Nodded Stoner, “It cost Moulder his life, but he wouldn’t have wanted it to cost you yours. You need to learn from your mistakes, and you have learned from Stone Moulder. You didn’t kill Button Mash.”

Soarin grunted, but his wing moved slightly closer to his muzzle; “Soarin.” Growled Stoner in his best ‘take charge’ attitude, “If you blow your nose into that wing, I’m going to make you do a hundred push-ups.”

Soarin’s wing held still for another moment, and then it slowly pulled away, and when it did; Soarin was smiling. “Come here you.” he murmured, hugging Stoner under his chin and then kissed his forehead.

“Alright, alright.” Grinned Stoner, pushing himself away; “No need to get all gushy.”

Soarin arranged Stoner comfortably in the crook of one arm and then leaned back on the cloud, watching the sunset. “I’m sorry.” He whispered, “I’m sorry for everything I said.”

Stoner reached over and patted Soarin’s side, “I forgive you.”

“You’re not angry?”

“Of course not.” Promised Stoner, “Brother’s always fight sometimes, but we get over it and move on; because that’s what brothers do; and we’ll always be together, right?”

“Right.”

Soarin relaxed, relief finally starting to find some refuge in him. He wiped what was left of his tears away with one wing, hugged Stoner with the other and then the snap of a powerful set of wings brought both of them to full alert as Rainbow Dash landed on the cloud a few paces away from them.

The way her face was various shades of red and white, as her eyes tried drilling holes in Soarin, made it obvious that she was pissed. “Rainbow Dash,” cautioned Stoner, jumping down to put himself between her and Soarin, “I know you’re upset about what Soarin did to Button Mash, and you have every right to be, but there’s a perfectly reasonable explanation for all of this. I can explain everything.”

The End

Author's Note

I had a bit of a crisis of conscience before I started posting this story; knowing I was going to leave it here, but I am glad to say that I'm planning on a sequel set after Rainbow Dash leaves the Wonderbolts where I will restore Soarin to mental and emotional health.

This is not that story.

This is a story I invented the same day I invented Soarin's Pet Rock; when I wondered how shipping him with Maud would work. It seemed like a good idea in my head, but ended up weirder then even this.

Read if you want, but this is a stand alone story that is not cannon with Soarin's Pet Rock, or Limits of the Horizon.

Maud and Pinkie double date

It's high school. Maud and Pinkie Pie will double date Soarin and Prince Sombra. This will be fun.

2 - Regrouping

Soarin groaned, rubbing the sides of his head with his wings and sat up, trying to make sense of what happened. As always, he checked his dresser first; bolted upright when he saw that Stoner wasn’t there. He leaped into the air, to make sure he wouldn’t step on him, and searched the room till he found Stoner, flat on his back behind the chest; “Stoner!” he scooped him up with both fore-hooves, checking him for injury, “Are you OK bro?”

“I’m fine Soarin, but that mare you brought back last night knocked you out and then robbed the place.”

“What did she take?” Stoner pointed to the empty closet, making Soarin groan. “What time is it?” Both of them looked at the clock; Soarin had slept through the night, it was nearly eight in the morning!

“She didn’t get them all; did she?”

“Sure did bro.”

“…Rainbow Dash is going to be so mad.”

“What are we going to do Soarin? Without a uniform, you can’t compete in the cup finals. The team needs you.”

“Maybe we could borrow one from someone else?”

Stoner shook his head; “Won’t work; no one else is your size. Remember when one of your uniforms got mixed up with Lightning Streak’s and you split it mid-show? It was embarrassing!”

“I… guess I need to go tell Rainbow Dash what happened so she can get her unicorn friend to make me a new one.”

Stoner rolled his eyes, “Really? Are you giving up that easily? Look, we both know Rainbow Dash has a crush on you, but with all these screw-ups it’s no wonder that she hasn’t made a move yet. If you’re ever going to get anywhere with her, she can’t know about this. We need to get back those uniforms ourselves!”

Soarin nodded slowly, “I… guess it’s just up to you and me then.”

“What about Bluey?” suggested Stoner, “He’ll help us.”

“You’re right,” agreed Soarin, “He can help us without Rainbow Dash hearing anything… after breakfast.”

“Dude, this is serious! We need to get on this mare’s trail pronto. Besides, we can eat at Bluey’s place. He always has nice stuff.”

“You're right; let’s go.” Soarin ran to his closet and got his saddlebags, which were custom made with clear plastic windows so Stoner could see where they were going and wouldn’t get airsick. Stoner hopped in and began humming inspirational music to put Soarin in a kick-ass mood as they sped towards Blueblood Manor.