Finishing Last

by DuncanR

Rating: everyone
Tags: Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Drama, Shining Armor, Prince Blueblood
Length: 2938

Back in high school, Shining Armor had a chance to teach Blueblood something important.

Back in their high school years, there was a chance meeting between Shining Armor and Prince Blueblood. These ponies couldn't be any more different, but it turns out that each of them has something to teach the other... though there's no telling whether Blueblood will listen.

This short story was written for the EFNW 2015 Pre-Con Contest, where the thematic prompt is "Making New Friends." Check it out, and best of luck to everyone who enters! Cover art is from Pika-Robo's DeviantArt page. Check it out, too!

Published 2015-03-17 20:20:02 UTC
Last updated 2015-03-17 20:20:02 UTC

Chapter 1

Young Prince Blueblood heard sharp hoofsteps approaching, and immediately spit his gum into a nearby rosebush. He looked up at the main entrance of Canterlot High School just as a young colt galloped out, grinning excitedly. He ran to the huge marble stairway and leapt onto the railing: his steel horseshoes scraped against the surface as he slid down and landed next to him.

“I made it!” Shining Armor shouted. His horn glowed, and a sheet of paper waved in the air. “I got an A minus, but it’s still an A!”

Blueblood swatted at the paper. “Calm down, will you?”

“Are you kidding? This is the best thing ever! Hay shakes on me when we get to Joe’s!”

Blueblood frowned at him. “A donut shop? Seems a little low-brow, doesn’t it?”

“See, that’s your problem.” Shining Armor walked on towards the street, looking back at him. “You gotta learn to lighten up, buddy. It doesn’t matter where you are, as long as you’re hanging out with your friends.”

Blueblood rolled his eyes as he walked after him. “Look, we’re not friends. I’m doing you a favor. That’s all.”

“We’re doing each other a favor,” Shining Armor said. “That makes us study buddies.”

“A prince? ‘Buddies’ with a lowly knight? Don’t make me laugh.”

Shining Armor reached over and pushed his shoulder. Blueblood pushed back, slightly harder. They wrestled together, laughing uproariously, and finally tumbled onto the lawn in a tangle of limbs.

“What are you doing?!”

They both froze in place and looked up at Cadence—Princess Mi Amore Cadenza, as she was known among the upper circles—standing by the side of the road. A couple of her friends were behind her, giggling.

Shining Armor scrambled to his feet. “Doing? What do you mean, doing?”

She squinted at them. “Have you been fighting?”

“What? Oh, no.” Blueblood stood up, brushed the dust off his school vest, and stroked his mane back. “Just two colts rolling around on the ground together. Nothing strange about that.”

Cadence turned to Shining Armor. “He’s not picking on you, is he?”

“What? Oh, no-no-no. Nothing like that.” He lifted up his test results. “Check it out! I passed my formal etiquette exam: I got an A minus!”

She gave the rumpled, dirt-stained paper a dubious look. “Well, that’s… still an A, I suppose. Congratulations.”

He gave Blueblood a sideways nod. “Couldn’t have done it without his help. He’s a genius on this very specific topic!”

Cadence turned to Blueblood and arched an eyebrow.

He set a hoof to his chest and let out an exaggerated sigh. “It does seem cruel to deny the world my brilliance.”

Shining Armor kicked a hoof full of dirt at him. He sputtered for a moment, then kicked a clod back at him. The conflict escalated quickly, with both of them digging frantically at the earth.

Cadence rolled her eyes and turned to go. Her small train of friends followed after her. They both watched as they walked down the path and turned down the street.

“She’s really something, isn’t she?” Blueblood said.

Shining Armor shrugged. “I dunno. Not exactly my type.”

Blueblood stood up and dusted some of the dirt off his exquisitely tailored vest. He reached a hoof out to Shining Armor. He took it, and Blueblood hauled him upright. “You said something about a hay shake, right? They better have vanilla shots, too. The real stuff… not that synthetic junk. I can’t imagine how you tolerate it.”

“It’s kind of expensive, but they’ve got it.”

They walked down the street side by side and turned towards the commercial district, located further down the mountainside. After a minute or so, Blueblood looked back over his shoulder at the upper class district behind them... a grand expanse of gold and marble architecture, with tall spires reaching for the blue sky above.

“So you got your A minus,” he said. “A deal’s a deal, right?”

Shining Armor nodded. “All my life, I’ve wanted to join the royal guard… and I never could have passed the formal etiquette exam without your help. I owe you a debt I can never repay.”

Blueblood rolled his eyes. “Who talks like that?”

Shining Armor ran out in front of him and locked eyes with him. “Okay, first lesson: Stop talking down to ponies. You should always behave like you’re a guest in somepony’s home.”

Blueblood snorted at him. “Don’t you lecture me. I’m a prince.”

Shining Armor stood his ground. “That was our deal. You help me pass the exam, and I help you ask your crush to the prom… without sticking your hoof in your mouth. You’re a genius when it comes to formal etiquette, but you don’t know one single thing about regular etiquette. We gotta change that.”

Blueblood clenched his jaw. Eventually, he lowered his head and folded his ears back. “Okay. Fine.”

Shining Armor tilted his head. “Okay, fine, what?”

Blueblood muttered something under his breath.

“Pardon?”

“I said sorry, okay?! Jeez!”

“There,” Shining Armor said, “was that so hard?”

They continued walking together, but Blueblood’s shoulders remained slumped. “Harder than you know,” he said.

“Good habits are like muscles. The more you use them, the stronger they get.” He gave him a pat on the shoulder. “Give it time.”

“Prom is two weeks from now,” Blueblood said. “I don’t have time.”

“Then you’d better get ready to buckle down.”

A quarter hour later, Blueblood and Shining Armor walked into Joe’s Donut Shop: a small fast-food joint with clean white tiles and wide-open windows all over. The humble interior belied its popularity: most of the tables were occupied, and there were two lines at the counter.

“Oh, come on,” Blueblood said. “How long is this going to take?”

Shining Armor walked to the back of the line. “Patience is a virtue.”

“Where’d you find that tired old chestnut? Sounds like advice for a farmer.”

Shining Armor lifted his chin slightly. “Purity, temperance, generosity, diligence, patience, kindness, and humility. They’re the chivalrous virtues every gentlecolt should aspire to. You know all about chivalry, don’t you?”

“Of... of course I do. I’m a Prince, aren’t I?”

Shining Armor poked his shoulder. “Then start acting like it. We’ll start with humility.”

He sighed. “Do you have any idea how hard it is to be humble when you’re as perfect as I am?”

Shining Armor frowned at him. “Do you even hear yourself talking?”

“No, I’m serious! As soon as I tell somepony I’m a…” Blueblood stepped closer and lowered his voice to a whisper. “As soon as ponies find out I’m a prince, they start bowing and scraping. It’s been that way ever since I was a foal: I don’t have normal friends. I never have.”

“Well, you do now. Right?”

“We’ve gone over this before. You’re just a knight. You’re like...” Blueblood held his hoof a few inches over the floor. “And I’m all, like…” He raised his hoof two feet off the floor.

Shining bit his lower lip. “...This is gonna be harder than I thought.”

“Excuse me, sirs?” said the filly behind the counter. “Can I help you over here?”

“Follow my lead,” Shining Armor whispered. He walked up to the counter and smiled at the filly. “Good afternoon. I’d like a razzleberry fill, sprinkled with powdered sugar. And two hay shakes.”

“Very good, sir. That’ll be three bits.”

“Oh, and this’ll be together.” He looked back at Blueblood. “You want anything?”

Blueblood stepped up beside him. “Hmm. Do you have any danishes?”

“We have cherry, apple, and cream cheese.”

“What about peach?”

“Sorry, sir.”

He stroked his chin. “Very well. I’ll have a kouign amann.”

The clerk blinked at him. “A what?”

Blueblood arched one eyebrow, critically. “...Really now?”

Shining Armor cleared his throat. “They don’t make anything to order. You have to pick from whatever’s on display.”

Blueblood looked back at him, wide-eyed with shock.

“Just order an eclair,” Shining Armor said. “You’ll like those.”

He snorted. “If I wanted an eclair, I would've just gone to a stupid grocery store!”

“There is a lineup waiting behind us!” he said. “Just ask for an eclair, remember to say please, and leave a nice tip!”

“A tip should be reserved for exceptional service. This place is barely adequate.”

Shining Armor pulled him close and scowled at him. “You are embarrassing me.”

Blueblood swallowed a lump in his throat. Shining Armor let go of him, and pushed him towards the counter.

“I’d like an eclair. Please.”

The clerk set a plate out, with a chocolate-drizzled eclair. “That’ll be two bits, sir.”

He set two bits on the counter. “Where’s the lace doily?”

“That’s enough.” Shining Armor’s horn glowed, and a magical aura lifted their orders into the air. He marched to a booth by the window, pulling Blueblood after him. “Sit down already.”

“She put it right on the plate,” he said. “There’s supposed to be a lace doily.”

“You’re not the center of the universe!” Shining Armor said. “You’re a guest on somepony else’s property, and you need to show some respect.”

Blueblood slumped in his seat and stared at his eclair.

“You’re not used to being around commoners,” Shining Armor said. “They have different customs. It might take you a while to pick it up.”

“I’m a prince, aren’t I? Everypony says I need to be strong, and proud, and… and everything. Like the princes you read about in fairy tales. They’re legendary heroes.”

Shining Armor slid his plate to one side and leaned against the table. “Those are just stories. They’re not real.”

“Every day and night,” Blueblood said, “Princess Celestia moves the sun and moon. She’s the center of the universe. And everypony loves her for it.” He wiped the corner of his eye and looked up at him. “Why can’t I be like that?”

Shining Armor worked his jaw back and forth a bit, deep in thought.

“She moves the sun and the moon,” he said, “but that’s not why she’s loved.”

“Then why? I don’t get it. Somepony explain it to me.”

“Trust me. I’m trying.” He picked up his hay shake and took a sip. “Eat your eclair. When you’re done, go up to the counter and apologize to the clerk.”

“Do I have to?”

He set the shake down. “This filly you’ve got a crush on. Do you really love her?”

“More than anything. I mean, I’ve never spoken to her before… not really. But she’s just so perfect. I want her to like me. But every time I think about her, I get all… I don’t know. I can never just go up and talk to her.”

“Then yes. You do have to apologize to the clerk.”

Blueblood let out a sigh, then picked up his eclair.

“By the way,” Shining Armor said, “I was thinking we could have a sleepover at my place and talk about good manners.”

“Eh. Sleepovers are lame.”

He took a bite of his eclair. After a moment of silence, he looked up. Shining Armor was frowning at him.

“I mean… it’s just…”

“Just what?”

He set the eclair down. “I’m sorry I called it lame.”

He nodded back at him. “You’ll get used to it eventually. All it takes is time.”

“Why don’t we hang out at my place?” said Blueblood. “There’s a couple guest rooms you can choose from. Better than sleeping on a couch, that’s for sure.”

“Really? Won’t your parents mind?”

“They’re out of town for the month,” he said. “They’re always out of town.”

Early the next morning, Shining Armor and Blueblood walked up the grand marble stairs that led to the front door of the high school. Students of all ages crowded around them, talking excitedly as they made their way inside.

“Remember,” Shining Armor said, “be nice to her. You have to be a good pony as well as a good prince.”

“Easy for you to say,” he muttered.

“Anything is easy to say.”

They walked through the entrance and went into the main hall. Instead of heading for their respective classrooms, they turned down the east wing and went towards the gymnasium.

“Seems a little sudden,” Blueblood said. “You were supposed to give me advice and stuff. How can I ask her to the prom when I’ve barely had a day to prepare?”

“Don’t even think of popping the question,” he said. “Introduce yourself. Maybe share a little conversation. Nothing serious.”

“Right. Introduce myself.” His eyes darted around the hallway. “What do we talk about?”

“If she wants to talk, she’ll bring something up herself. Remember what I told you?”

“Polite conversation should always be fifty-fifty,” Blueblood said. “If she talks for a minute, I should talk for no more than a minute. And don’t cut her off.”

“And whatever you do, don’t talk about yourself.”

“...Unless she asks me about myself.”

“Right.” They reached the end of the hallway, and stopped in front of a pair of wide double-doors. “She’s organizing the prom. If you volunteer to help, it’ll give you an excuse to spend more time around her.”

He let out a frustrated sigh. “Manual labor. Wonderful.”

Shining Armor set a hoof on his shoulder. “Remember. You have to care about other ponies. Try to put their interests ahead of your own.”

Blueblood nodded. He opened the door and went into the gymnasium. There were students everywhere, setting up decorations and banners, and arranging long tables by the wall. He made his way across the hall and caught sight of her standing on the stage,setting up chairs and music stands for a small orchestra piece. Whenever she waved her hoof, the other students hurried to follow her instructions.

You’re not the center of the universe, he thought. Think of other ponies first.

He climbed up onto the stage, walked over to her, and gently cleared his throat. “Excuse me, Cadence?”

She pointed across the stage without turning around. “Leave it over by the string section,” she said. “I’ll sort it out later.”

“I’m, uh…”

Cadence turned to look at him. “Oh! Sorry, there. Can I help you?”

“Oh, no. I was just wondering… if we could talk.”

“I’m a little busy here. Can it wait?”

“I thought I could help. You know. Set things up.”

“Really?” She walked over to him, smiling politely. “We’ve still got so many banners to hang from the ceiling, and hardly any unicorns volunteered. You can start with those.”

He nodded. “Just show me what to do.”

Cadence tilted her head slightly. “You’re… Blueblood, aren’t you? I’ve heard a lot about you.”

He chuckled. “Not too many things, I hope.”

“From what everypony’s said, you’re an arrogant, conceited jerk.”

He tugged at the collar of his vest. “Oh. Well, that’s… ah...”

“But I also know you helped Shining Armor pass his formal etiquette exam.” She smiled at him. “So I guess ‘everypony’ wasn’t right about you, after all.”

He smiled. “It’s kind of you to say so.”

She took a step towards him, and the light scent of perfume wafted over him. “This might sound strange,” she said, “but could we talk in private? Just for a moment? There’s something I’ve been meaning to ask you about.”

He stared at her. “Seriously?”

“Yes. It’s a little personal.”

She led him further backstage, away from the buzz of activity. He did his best to keep his knees from jittering.

“We don’t get a lot of volunteers for setup. Everypony’s more worried about finding dates for the prom dance. I’ve had to put in a lot of hours here and, truth be told, I haven’t had much time for socializing, myself.”

“You might want to get on that soon,” Blueblood said, genuinely concerned. “It is a social event, after all.”

“I can’t just sit back and do nothing,” she said. “If nopony volunteers, there won’t be any Prom at all!” She stroked aside a lock of her long, pink hair. “Regardless. You’re friends with Shining Armor, right? I’ve been sitting for his baby sister for a month now, but we haven’t really spoken much.”

He let out a frustrated sigh. “Well, I am a prince, and he’s only…” His voice trailed off. He stared at her for a moment, then looked down at the floor.

“...Blueblood? Is something wrong?”

“Yes,” he said. “I haven’t known him long, but… Shining Armor is my friend.”

“Even though he’s a knight, and you’re a prince?”

He shook his head. “Class doesn’t matter to him. He’s nice to everypony. I kind of appreciate that about him, actually.”

She smiled. “So, then, he wouldn’t mind going to prom with a Princess? As a date, I mean?”

Blueblood watched her face. Her glowing smile. Her violet eyes. The delicate, refined arc of her cheeks.

“Do you have a dress yet?” he said.

She shook her head. “No. I haven’t had any time to prepare. I’m a complete shambles!”

“He’s also been too busy to find a date. But now that his exam is done… he likes blue.”

She let out a brief squeal. “Oh, thank you! Thank you so much!”

She darted forward and gave him a quick peck on the cheek. He instantly straightened up, limbs paralyzed. She ran past him, back to the front stage, where the other volunteers were waiting.

Shining Armor looked up as Blueblood walked back out of the Gymnasium. “Hey! How’d it go?”

He walked past him. “Get lost.”

“What? Blueblood, wait!”

“We’re not friends, okay? Don’t ever talk to me like we’re friends.”

Shining Armor watched as he trudged down the hallway, leaving without a second glance.