It's A Secret To Everypony

by Mossbender

Rating: everyone
Tags: Slice of Life
Length: 3016

When Scootaloo’s latest prank meant for Diamond Tiara doesn’t go as planned, they are forced to do a school assignment together. To make matters worse, they have to go into the Everfree Forest in order to complete it. Nothing can go wrong, right?

Peanut butter and jelly go well together (unless you're allergic or what have you), but Scootaloo and Diamond Tiara? Not as much.

When Scootaloo’s latest prank meant for Diamond Tiara does not go as planned, they are forced to do a school assignment together. To make matters worse, they have to go into the Everfree Forest in order to complete it.

The last thing that either of them wanted was to work together, but perhaps there is more to this assignment than they realize. Hopefully they won’t tear each other apart first… because they’ll need each other now more than ever.

Cover art by me, Mossbender!

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2015-03-26 01:20:02 UTC

The Assignment

"I can't believe I have to spend the day in this horrible place with you blank flank, it's all your fault!"

Scootaloo rolled her eyes in annoyance. "For the last time Diamond Tiara, that tea wasn't meant for Ms. Cheerilee! You were supposed to have it but nooo, somepony just had to give the tea to our teacher instead!"

"Ugh, how was I supposed to know that you had mixed poison joke into it?" Diamond Tiara asked, straightening her tiara as they continued to walk down the overgrown path. "Now we have to find a fresh sample and write a boring paper about it, which you will be writing of course."

"What? No! This is a partner assignment!" Scootaloo pointed her hoof at Diamond Tiara and then herself multiple times. "Get it? Partners."

Diamond Tiara tilted her head back and laughed. "Partners? Oh no Scootaloo, I'll never be your partner."

Scootaloo closed her eyes and sighed. There was no point in trying to reason with Diamond Tiara, it simply wasn't possible. Now she was stuck with her — in the Everfree Forest of all places — because Diamond Tiara simply did not drink the tea. It would have been her best prank yet, but for now, she had to focus on not going insane.

"Why in Equestria did we have to bring her along?" Diamond Tiara asked, causing Scootaloo to open her eyes. "We've been following her for almost an hour now."

Scootaloo looked at the Zebra in front of them and then at Diamond Tiara. "Why? Are you serious? Zecora knows this forest better than anypony I know! We should be thankful she is even here with us! She probably wouldn't even be here if it weren't for Apple Bloom."

"Well, Zecora certainly isn't doing a good job now is she? She hasn't even said a single thing since we've been here!"

"Hey! She's trying her best at least. All you've done is complain and complain and complain!" Scootaloo took a deep breath to calm herself before she continued. "Apple Bloom told me why she hasn't talked. It's because today is some sort of tradition from her homeland and we should respect that."

"Talk or don't talk, it doesn't matter to me." Diamond Tiara sighed and shook her head. "All I know is that it's not bringing me any closer to the poison joke and out of this dreadful place."

The trio continued to walk through the forest in silence, each hoping to find any sign of the mischievous blue plant. Scootaloo welcomed the silence, happy that she didn't have to listen to Diamond Tiara's constant complaining, for the time being anyway.

As time slowly crawled by, Scootaloo started to become worried. They should have found at least some poison joke by now, so why did the Everfree — the most popular haven for poison joke — suddenly have nothing? The poison joke she had used for her prank was from Zecora's hut, but unfortunately she had taken the last of it. Scootaloo briefly wondered if Zecora knew that she had taken it, but she pushed such thoughts out of her mind. She had to stay focused.

Before long, they had reached a rather large mud pit. Zecora and Scootaloo crossed it with ease since neither of them minded getting a little dirt on their hooves, but this wasn't the case for Diamond Tiara. She had suddenly stopped before it, her little heart racing as fast as it could from such an appalling sight. Scootaloo noticed that Diamond Tiara was no longer next to her and turned around, only to find her slowly backing away from the mud.

"What's the matter Diamond Tiara? Afraid to get your hooves dirty?" Scootaloo giggled. "It's just some plain old mud, besides, you take mud baths all the time at the spa! What's the difference? Or are you just chicken?"

Diamond Tiara scowled furiously and wished that her leg was longer, just for a moment so she could smack the grin off of Scootaloo's face. "There is absolutely no way I'm going to cross this mud blank flank! Besides, the mud at the spa is vastly superior and cleaner than this... this peasant mud! If I'm such a chicken, then I suggest that you look in a mirror!"

Scootaloo felt a wave of anger wash over her as she stretched her wings. Nopony called her chicken. Nopony. Diamond Tiara would be eating her words later.

"You're just slowing us down Diamond Tiara!" Scootaloo yelled, quickly growing impatient with her.

"Me? Slowing you down? Ha! The way I see it blank flank, it's you and that mute Zebra over there that's slowing me down!" Diamond Tiara turned around and began to walk away with her muzzle raised in the air. "Now if you'll excuse me, I have to find some poison joke so I can get out of this awful forest!"

Scootaloo couldn't believe what she was hearing. "You won't be able to last five minutes on your own Diamond Tiara! Zecora knows this forest better than the both of us. We need to follow her!"

Diamond Tiara suddenly stopped, but she didn't look back. "If you and I were the last ponies in Equestria Scootaloo, I still would never take orders from you, especially not from a blank flank!"

Scootaloo clenched her teeth, grinding them as she watched Diamond Tiara walk away. She looked back at Zecora to find that she was still walking. She had not heard the conversation between Diamond Tiara and Scootaloo. In her mind, two choices appeared. The first one was to get Zecora so they could go after Diamond Tiara, but there was the possible risk that they could lose her. She had to go with the second choice, there was no other way.

"Diamond Tiara... you are one stubborn butt," Scootaloo groaned and waded back through the mud. Once on the other side, she immediately began to gallop after the filly.

Fortunately, Diamond Tiara hadn't gone too far, much to Scootaloo's relief.

"Diamond! Diamond Tiara! Wait!" Scootaloo flicked her mane away from the front of her face. "Stop!"

Diamond Tiara slowly came to a stop and turned around, having heard Scootaloo's voice. She frowned at Scootaloo, clearly annoyed that she had followed her when the ground suddenly shifted beneath her hooves.

"Um... Scootaloo?" Diamond Tiara realized a second too late what was happening just as the soft ground gave way beneath her. Scootaloo heard her scream, only for it to be cut short a few moments later.

"Diamond Tiara!" Scootaloo galloped over to where Diamond had fallen and peered over the edge. "Diamond Tiara! Are you alright?"

There was no response from her. Scootaloo never thought that she would actually care about anything that happened to Diamond Tiara, but she knew deep down that nopony should be left behind, even if it was her worst enemy.

Scootaloo slid down the side of the cliff and walked over to Diamond Tiara, fearing for the worst. She rolled Diamond Tiara over and breathed a sigh of relief. She was still breathing.

Despite how far she fell, Diamond Tiara was only covered with a few small scrapes and bruises.

Scootaloo sat down against the trunk of a nearby tree and placed her head between her hooves. "You were right Diamond, it was my fault for getting us into this mess. This assignment... this place... why would Ms. Cheerilee send us here? Something doesn't feel right..."

Scootaloo looked down at Diamond Tiara and felt something stir inside her that she thought she never would have felt for Diamond in her entire life. Sympathy. It was a weird feeling.

Scootaloo suddenly heard a howl in the distance, causing her ears to perk up. She could recognize that sound anywhere.

"Oh no... Timberwolves..." Scootaloo felt herself begin to panic and quickly rose to her hooves. Diamond Tiara still hadn't woken up yet. "I'm not leaving you here Diamond, I won't!"

Scootaloo hauled Diamond onto her back with much difficulty, surprised that she was heavier than she looked. Going back up the cliff wasn't an option, so she followed alongside the bottom of it instead. The foliage proved to be too dense to travel through however, forcing her to slowly move away from the cliff and deeper into the forest where the path was mostly clear.

As the forest grew darker, the howls became louder. Scootaloo suddenly felt a small pinch on her ear, but she chose to ignore it. Her ear was suddenly pinched again, more painfully this time.

"Ow! Hey! What's the big—"

"What in Equestria do you think you are doing blank flank? Put me down at once!"

Scootaloo grinned, glad that Diamond Tiara was back again. She felt Diamond jump off of her back and she turned around to meet her face to face.

"Are you okay Diamond Tiara?" Scootaloo took a step back when Diamond Tiara stomped the ground in front of her.

"Okay? Okay? Do I look okay to you? I'm covered in filth and my tiara is bent!" Diamond Tiara pointed at Scootaloo. "And it's your fault for letting me fall!"

"My fault? I don't control the dirt Diamond Tiara! If it weren't for me you—" Scootaloo's eyes widened and she took another step back. "Uh... Diamond? Behind you..."

"Don't interrupt me when I'm talking! Besides, I bet you're just trying to scare me, aren't you?" Diamond Tiara turned around and smirked at the Timberwolf in front of her. "Wow. A Timberwolf. How impress— a Timberwolf!"

The Timberwolf growled at Diamond, baring it's sharp, wooden teeth. It was clear to both fillies that it definitely wasn't stopping to ask for directions.

"Come on Diamond! Don't just stand there! Run!" Scootaloo pulled on Diamond's tail, snapping her out of her trance. "Run!"

Without a second thought, both fillies turned around and began to gallop away, trying to put as much distance as possible between themselves and the Timberwolf. They dodged the low-lying branches and roots that the forest threw at them, but the Timberwolf was slowly catching up to them.

Diamond Tiara quickly glanced back at the Timberwolf. "Ah! Scootaloo! It's gaining on us!"

Scootaloo glanced back herself to find that Diamond Tiara was right. She looked around, trying to find anything they could use to possibly slow the beast. She suddenly spotted a blue glow up ahead and gasped, quickly recognizing what it was.

"Diamond! Follow my lead!" Scootaloo yelled.

They galloped through a cluster of trees and came to a stop before the source of the blue glow. Before them was a patch of plants that they had been searching for. Poison joke.

Diamond Tiara rolled her eyes. "Well great. We found what we came here for, but how exactly does this help us now blank flank?"

"Don't worry Diamond Tiara, you just have to trust me." Scootaloo grinned as a simple plan formed in her mind. "We're just gonna play a little joke on that Timberwolf."

Diamond Tiara opened her mouth to question Scootaloo's plan when it suddenly hit her. She nodded and they turned around to face the spot that the Timberwolf would appear from.

They didn't have to wait long and they watched as the Timberwolf slowly emerged from the cluster of trees, creeping closer to them with every step it took.

"Are you ready Diamond?"

"I... I guess? What exactly do you have in—"

The Timberwolf suddenly leapt at them without warning, but Scootaloo was ready. She dashed towards Diamond Tiara who hadn't moved and tackled her, bringing them both to the ground and out of the Timberwolf's path.

The Timberwolf landed in the patch of poison joke and Scootaloo watched triumphantly as the plants immediately went to work. Scootaloo stood up and pulled Diamond Tiara up with her. When they saw the Timberwolf again, it was no bigger than a mouse.

"Heh, hey Diamond, watch this." Scootaloo lowered her head until she she was right in front of the tiny Timberwolf. "Boo."

Scootaloo laughed as the Timberwolf yelped and disappeared back into the depths of the forest.

"Hmph, now I'm even more filthy, I can't believe you tackled me Scootaloo!" Diamond Tiara stood up and wiped her mane out of her face. "This has been the absolute worst day of my entire life!"

Scootaloo groaned. Even after a life or death situation, Diamond Tiara was still annoying. "You were just standing there Diamond! If it weren't for me—"

"Thank you blank flank... if that's what you wanted to hear," Diamond said, much to Scootaloo's surprise. "There, I... I said it."

Scootaloo looked down at her hooves and dragged one across the ground. "It... it was nothing Diamond Tiara."

"No, it was something blank flank. You saved me when you could have just left me for that Timberwolf."

Scootaloo desperately wanted to end the conversation, so she picked a poison joke from the patch. "Here Diamond, you can have the honour of carrying it."

She carried it over to Diamond Tiara and carefully placed it in her beaten-up tiara, making sure neither of them came into contact with the plant's petals.

Diamond looked up at the flower and gulped. "Uh... thanks. We should probably get out of here now."

Scootaloo nodded. "This time Diamond, I couldn't agree more."

Outside the forest, the sun was beginning to set just as the two fillies emerged from its depths. They were surprised when they found who was waiting for them.

"Apple Bloom! Sweetie Belle! Zecora!" Scootaloo galloped over to them, but she didn't embrace them. Hugs weren't really her thing.

"Silver Spoon!" Diamond Tiara galloped over to her and embraced Silver, but it was clearly present on Silver's face that Diamond didn't smell very pleasant.

"Scootaloo! We're mighty glad you're safe, we were just about to go after ya." Apple Bloom glanced over at Diamond Tiara. "Diamond didn't cause ya any trouble now did she?"

Scootaloo looked over at Diamond and smiled. "Eh, not really, nothing that I couldn't handle anyway. I have a question though... how exactly did you know where to find us?"

"Ah, you can thank Zecora for that Scoots. When she saw that both of you were gone, she immediately came to get us and Silver Spoon." Apple Bloom gently nudged Scootaloo's shoulder. "Don't ya remember? She can move through the Everfree faster than most ponies in Equestria!"

"How did you get separated anyway Scootaloo?" Sweetie Belle asked.

"Oh, well uh, that's quite a long story. I'll save it for when we get back to the clubhouse." Scootaloo laughed nervously and rubbed the back of her head. "Yeah..."

"Hey! Blank flanks!" The three fillies turned to watch as Diamond Tiara approached them alongside Silver Spoon. "I need a moment with Scootaloo."

Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle looked over at Scootaloo and raised their eyebrows, but Scootaloo could only shrug as Diamond pulled her away from the others.

"We still need to write that paper right?" Diamond looked over her shoulder to see that the others were watching them carefully.

Scootaloo nodded. "Yeah, I know I have to write the— wait, did you just say we?"

"No, I said a parasprite should write it! Yes, I said we Scootaloo, because we're partners, remember?" Diamond Tiara pointed her hoof at Scootaloo and then herself. "Get it? Partners. I was wondering if you would like to... you know... come over to my place so we could write it. You have to clean yourself first though."

Scootaloo's jaw dropped in disbelief. Was Diamond Tiara actually serious? This sounded too good to be true.

"What did you do with the real Diamond Tiara?" Scootaloo eyed her up down, looking for anything out of the ordinary. Was she perhaps replaced by a Changeling?

Diamond Tiara simply laughed at her. "I'm still the real Diamond, for there can be no other! Anyway, only you can come. I won't bring Silver, and you don't bring the other blank flanks. Deal?"

"So... does this mean we're... friends?" Scootaloo let the word roll off of her tongue. It felt weird saying it to Diamond Tiara.

"Ugh, you're such a blank flank!" Diamond yelled, causing Scootaloo to become confused for a moment— when Diamond suddenly winked at her. "It's a secret to everypony."

Scootaloo was quick to play along. "Oh yeah? And you're such a spoiled brat!"

Diamond Tiara nodded in approval. They walked back over to the others and they both separated once more.

"Come along now Silver, I've spent enough time with blank flanks for one day." Diamond raised her muzzle in the air and Silver followed suit as they walked away.

"Ugh, she is such a brat!" Apple Bloom kicked a rock and watched as it rolled away.

Scootaloo simply smiled as she watched Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon disappear.

"Yeah. She sure is."

The moon was high in the sky, blanketing Ponyville in its pale light. At the schoolhouse, Ms. Cheerilee was busy marking her papers. The only source of light was her candle, which suddenly went out.

Cheerilee sighed and dropped her pen onto the desk. "Don't try to hide Discord. I know you're there."

The candle suddenly vanished in a puff of smoke, only to be replaced by a certain Draconequus.

"Why good evening Ms. Cheerilee. I do believe you know what I'm here for."

"Of course, I wouldn't dare forget. I trust that everything went well then?" Cheerilee pulled out a brown satchel from her desk drawer and placed it on the desk.

Discord's eyes lit up when he saw the bag. "Well, there were a few... eh... bumps and laughs along the way, but I doubt they will cause you anymore grief."

"Good. That herbal remedy had an awful after taste you know." Cheerilee pushed the satchel towards Discord, which he quickly grabbed and peered inside.

A smile appeared on Discord's face as he snapped his fingers, causing the bag to disappear. "If you ever need anything else, you know where to find me my dear. After all, I do play a mean Timberwolf."