Chapter 3

I stared blankly at Celestia as tears fell down her face. “Okay, you got me Celestia,” I said, my voice cracking, “n-now where’s my sister.”

“As I have told you, your sister is–”

        “NO!” I shouted, “Cross isn’t dead! She can’t be.” I shoved Cheery off me, denying the comforting hug. “You’re a dirty liar Celestia!” I ran to the door. “Cross is stronger than anyone I know, she’ll never die!” I blew past just as the purple unicorn yelled something, running through the twisty turny hallways.

I ran and ran until I couldn’t tell where I was. Passing countless servants and guards, even a few nobles, and I still ran. I ran until I tripped over my hooves and slid face first onto the cobblestone floor. There was no blood, I wasn’t in any pain, but when I looked up, I was alone.

Why would Celestia lie to me? I thought, curling into a ball.

There were a few doors on either side of the hallway, no windows like in the room I woke. “Celestia’s fair and kind, she wouldn’t lie to me,” I said, struggling to keep myself together. I wanted nothing more than to feel Cross tap my shoulder and say “Don’t cry Crystal, I’m right here,” but as more time passed, my wish became a delusion.

“If Celestia is fair and kind, then why did she kidnap me? She could have told me this with Mom, that way I’d have a familiar shoulder to cry on.”

It’s a lie, Cross is alive and you know it!

Yes, I did know it, but that brought up the question of why Celestia would kidnap me just to lie to me? That seems like a waste of her time.

        Breathing in and out, I finally calmed down. I relaxed my legs and sat like a normal pony. “Celestia doesn’t lie to her subjects, and she would never waste her own time.” I bit my tongue, “but it’s not true, Cross isn’t dead.”

        I suddenly thought of my dragon bookmark. A beautiful rendition of a red dragon blowing hot fire into the sky, rising proudly to meet the sun, then I remembered something. At school two days ago, during recess, I overheard two fillies talk about a dragon attack in Cloudsdale. It was one of the few times I ever listened to a conversation at school. It killed well over three hundred ponies and orphaned hundreds more. Buildings were burned to the ground. About half of the entire city was lost, but what did it have to do with Cross?

Celestia wouldn’t lie or waste her time or play with your emotions.

Realization struck me like a hot iron and I curled up into a tight ball again. There were probably a lot of injured ponies, and foals, after that dragon attack. Who heals the injured? Doctors. What was Cross? A doctor. Tears pricked at my eyes, and this time I didn’t run. I tightened myself and cried. Cross really was dead.

        I cried, the cold floor my only company. I wanted to be hugged, never have I wanted to be hugged so much in my life. I wanted, no, needed Cross to hug me, but, now I knew that would never happen again.

        Eventually I heard a cough come from in front of me, followed by a rough voice saying, “are you okay, little miss?”

        Looking up, I saw a white stallion in blue armor looking down at me. He had blue eyes and a neon blue mane and tail, and looked a little worried. “N-No,” I said, tears choking my words, “I j-just learned that my s-sister is… dead.”

        “Oh!” the stallion took off his helmet and sat besides me, putting an arm around me. I let him pull me close. “That’s horrible. I have a little sister myself. If I ever lost her I’d probably cry too.”

        Quietly, I resisted wrapping my arms around his armored flank and slowly moved so I could rest my head on his stomach. I grabbed both his hooves, thankful that he didn’t resist, and wrapped them around me like a filly might a comfort blanket. He eventually got the message and tightened his grip, lifting me onto his lap.

        “Th-That’s what you wanted, right?” He said, resting his head on mine. He smelled of sweat and his hooves were cold and clammy, but the warmth of his stomach helped loosen my tongue a little.

        “Yes, but, you could use a shower.”

        “Wow,” he chuckled, “Even in the face of tragedy you act like my sister.” We sat there for a while, me breathing in and out, trying not to cry as well as cope with the hard truth. “I like to protect things.”

        “Huh?”

        “My job as a lieutenant is to protect ponies, but I don’t do it for them, to be honest, I don’t care at all about most ponies in here, and wouldn’t mind them dead.” he paused and I felt his hooves briefly tighten around my waist, “don’t tell anyone I said that.”

        “Okay,” I said.

        “Thank you,” he relaxed his hooves, “well there is one pony I want to protect, my little sister best friend forever. If she were to die like your sister, I… well I’d probably quit my job.”

        “And go against your cutie mark?”

        “No, I’d try to find another job later on, after I grieved, but the point I’m trying to make is that I understand some of what you’re probably going through.”

        “Thanks for saying some, because you don’t know the half of it,” I said, nuzzling his chin. For a stallion in the royal guard, he was pretty good at knowing just what to say. “My BSBFF was more than that.” I paused, fighting back the urge to cry as memories of Cross flooded me. “She was like a second mommy. She changed me, burped me, fed me, and let me sleep with her when I had a nightmare.”

        “What about your real Mom?” the guard asked.

        “She was there too, but, with her job as head surgeon she has a lot of long days and never got home before ten at night, and that’s my bed time.”

        “So your sister filled in for her?”

        “Yeah, but,” I sniffed, silently knowing that I’d burst into tears. “four months ago my sister ran away. She hurt my mom, but,” I could feel myself choking up, “I just want to see her again, now I can’t!” It happened, I buried my head in the guards arms and cried. He tried everything, rubbing my back to bouncing me on his knee, but I wouldn’t stop crying, couldn’t stop. He didn’t say any comforting words, and I don’t blame him, what could he have even said?

        “Lieutenant,” another guard, this time in gold armor, said. “Armor… oh I see you found the missing child.”

I looked at Armor, silently pleading to keep this between the two of us, and he nodded.

“Yes private Goldhooves, tell the others to stop looking. I’ll bring her to Celestia.” Celestia, that’s exactly who I wanted to see.

“Yes sir.” Goldhooves walked away.

It was silent except for my occasional sniffle. I looked up at Lieutenant Armor and smiled a little. “Shall we?” He levitated me onto his cold armored back and started to trot through the halls.

We reached the same mahogany doors and when the lieutenant opened them, Celestia sat on a large red cushion, the entire room empty. She looked up at me and smiled, opening one of her wings. The lieutenant set me down and I ran to her, tears already leaking from me again. When I heard the door close I let out a long cry before colliding with Celestia’s soft white side.

Like Lieutenant Armor, Celestia didn’t say anything, but I felt much safer with her than him, solely because she had a wing to hide me from possible prying eyes and muffle my cries. She nuzzled me and rubbed my back like Lieutenant, but her’s felt more honed, like she knew exactly what a crying child needed.

I cried until I ran out of tears, and then I just sat in her embrace.

“Feel any better?” Celestia said in her calm, motherly voice.

“A… a little,” I gulped, “I’m sorry for running away and calling you a dirty liar.”

“Don’t be, if I was told that my sister had died I’d probably do the same thing.”

We lapsed into silence again. I felt content with staying like this forever, Celestia by my side, but that could never happen. Especially when my stomach growls like an Ursa.

  “Is someone hungry?” Celestia said, chuckling a little. “Seven hours sleeping can make for one heck of an appetite.”

I blushed a little, “Yes”

“Say no more.” I heard her light her horn and then a few pops in the distance before her wing opened. What sat before me was all but a banquet of comfort foods. There was the classic mac and cheese, made in little sun shapes, daisy sandwiches lathered in honey, hay fries and hay burgers, and, of course, candy. “Try to eat some real food before devouring the candy.”

“Say no more!” I shouted, smiling again. Celestia passed me a plate and I piled it on, mac and cheese with a single hay burger for the first coarse. As I ate, not only did my stomach fill up, but my spirits were lifted. It’s called comfort food for a reason, but as time went on, a question nagged at me like a dirty hangnail.

“Celestia,” I said, setting my fork down.

“Yes, Crystal?” Celestia said between bites.

“How did Cross… die?”

Celestia sat her plate down and pulled me with her wing. I had just taken a bite of a daisy sandwich and got honey all over her wing, but she didn’t seem to mind.

“Like a soldier, braver even,” she looked down at me and smiled, levitating a napkin and wiping some honey off my mouth. “It was after the second dragon attack. I had sent most of my best doctors to Cloudsdale, enchanting the non pegisi with a cloudwalking spell. Cross seemed the happiest. I was there when she walked on clouds for the first time.”

I took a drink of fizzy soda to wash down all the honey.

“I should never have sent her, all of this could have been avoided. I blame myself for it all, and just like with you, I’ll have plenty of nights where I wake up crying.”

I gulped, my nerve wavering towards sorrow, “So how did it happen?”

“The second dragon, a red one, was terrorizing the town, and Cross hid in one of the buildings, we think this is how it happened, and there she found three orphaned fillies, two of them unicorns and one a pegasus  huddled together, in tears.” I gulped, imagining just how scared those fillies must have been. “Cross comforted them, shielded them with her own body until the very end. We found the four of them huddled together, blacker than the darkest of nights.”

I wiped a tear from my eye, grabbing another honey and daisy sandwich. To those fillies, an adult like Cross must have felt like a saint sent from above. Finally after countless minutes of hearing nothing but  the screams of burning ponies someone came to comfort them, even if it was only for a few minutes, or an hour. I knew if I were in that situation I’d like to be told I’d make it again and again by a warm adult instead of wondering what could happen on my own.

“Thanks, Celestia, I… I feel a little better now.”

“Like I said, she was braver than some of my own soldiers.”

We ate in silence, each bite felt like a little more padding between me and my problems, and with a full stomach It felt like a mile. Neither of us said anything for the longest time, and as the moon rose in the sky I could feel sleep slowly creep up on me.

“How do you feel about sleeping here at the castle?” Celestia said as I grabbed a cherry orange swirl lollipop.

“I’d rather go home,” I said, looking away.

“Well, sorry about that, but you don’t really have a choice, you’ll be sleeping with my personal student, Twilight Sparkle. She’s the owner of that doll you woke up with.”

I remembered that ragged doll, it was small and creepy, a kind gesture, but I still wanted to go home and hug my mom. She’s probably still sneezing and has a headache with the force of an ice storm, but I just want to confide in her for a few hours, pretend nothing happened.

Celestia would have agreed, and maybe even scheduled a flight to take me home, or do it personally, but at that moment, Cheery was opening the door to Mom’s bedroom, a look of murder on her face.

“Don’t worry, she’s one of the sweetest ponies you’ll meet, and she’s really smart, just like you.” Celestia said, pulling me in with her sticky wing again.

I rested my head on her chest and sighed, “Okay, Princess,”

“Hey,” Celestia said, chuckling, “you called me by my title. Theres a first time for everything I guess.”

“Yeah, I would have called you that this whole time, but you kinda kidnapped me.”

“Yeah, I guess I could have given you a heads up, but where’s the fun in that?” Celestia chuckled, “I’m sorry though.”

“It’s alright, no one will know, and there’s no point crying over spilt milk.”

“That, my little pony, is very true. Are you full?”

I got up, licked my lollipop a few more times before throwing it onto my plate. “Yeah, can I take the last lollipop to go?”

Celestia got up, shook her legs and fluttered her wings. “Sure, and don’t worry about the dishes, one of the maids will get it.”

I nodded and got up, grabbed the last lollipop and placed it on my back. “Can I go home tomorrow?”

“I’m afraid not, there are a few things I need to set up and I’m not done with the bad news.”

“You mean there’s more!” I shouted.

“I’m afraid so, but the worst is over, tomorrow you’ll find out why I was the one to bring you the news of your sister’s death and no other.”

I stopped, bumping into Celestia’s right hoof. The question never popped into my head. I never thought about why Celestia brought me, it was always why I was here. “Why is that?”

“You’ll figure that out tomorrow. You will need rest before you take the news. Imagine how you’d feel learning of your sister’s death…”

“Can you stop bringing it up?” I said.

“Sorry, but imagine how you would have taken it if you were tired.”

“Not good?”

“Right, now lets head off, Twilight should be done making a bed for you by now.”

We walked along the cobblestone hallways, Celestia leading the way. All of the ponies we passed bowed before wishing Celestia a good night and heading to their respective rooms. I began to wonder if I should have bowed when I first saw Celestia in the throne room, but tried to push it out of my mind.

We passed a few more ponies before they thinned out and soon we were in front of the tallest tower in the castle.

“She’s just up here,” Celestia said as we started the stairs.

“Good,” I stated before yawning.

We reached the top about ten minutes later and Celestia opened the door. Inside was a lush… library. For a moment I squealed inside, so many books, so much knowledge, but then I saw Twilight.

It was the same purple unicorn that glared at me back at the throne room, and she didn’t look all too happy to see me now.

“Twilight, this is Crystal, she’s going to sleep in your room tonight.” Celestia said motioning me with her wing to move ahead. I did but stopped in front of Twilight. Her lavender eyes glared at me and I could feel her anger. Her dark blue mane and tail with a pink and purple highlight was wet and I could smell fresh pomegranate shampoo.

“Okay, Princess,” Twilight said, emphasizing the princess for some reason or another.

Celestia nodded and said “Good night” before heading out, leaving me with Twilight, too tired to realize how angry she was.

When Celestia had gone down half of the stairs, Twilight rushed me, not pinning me to the ground, but staring dead into my eyes. Steam seemed to come from her nostrils and she looked ready to bite my head off. “How dare you disrespect the princess,” she shouted, getting spit on my face. “She took you in out of the kindness of her heart and what do you do? You disrespect her by not addressing her with her title, interrupt her and call her a dirty liar. I should throw you out the window for this.”

It was like the flick of a switch. All of the pain I had turned into raw anger and I snapped, slapping Twilight in her smug face. I stared at her, not caring if she was twice my size and shouted, making sure to get all of my spit on her face. “Oh, I’m sorry, you ignorant little bitch! Celestia didn’t bring me here out of the kindness of her own heart, she kidnapped me. I just wanted to spend a nice day with my mother, one whom I never get to see, but your kind princess had to take me here against my will, and you know what she did when I got here?” Twilight shook her head, her eyes the size of pinpricks. “She told me that my sister was dead! My sister, the pony that changed me, fed me and loved me when my mother couldn’t is dead! Now I want you to go fuck yourself you inconsiderate little piece of shit. Learn to care about someone other than your fucking princess for once in your damn life!”

When I finished I moved towards a basket either filled with laundry or my bed, buried myself and cried. I didn’t even notice the baby dragon that popped his little head up, I just cried until I fell asleep.

I dreamed of a long, dark tunnel, and at the end was this immaculate light, shining and guiding me to the end. I started running like I was being chased by a train and saw at the end of the tunnel was my BSBFF.

“Come here, Crystal,” Cross said with open arms.

I ran faster, heart beating faster and a smile of my face. There she was. My sister, she wasn’t dead, she’s right in front of me, ready to give me a hug! I ran and ran, but she never seemed to get closer, then the light went out.

I heard a huge roar as fire lit the room, exposing a giant red dragon, much akin to my bookmark, towering over my sister, but she didn’t scream. She held three cowering orphaned fillies behind her, keeping the dragon between herself and the fillies.

“No!,” I shouted, “Run Cross! Run away. Please don’t die!” I watched helplessly as the dragon ate all four of them in one gulp.

I screamed, thrashing about in my basket before realizing it was a dream. I looked around the large room, large enough to hide a full grown dragon I thought, and empty, devoid of life and warm things.

I began to cry.

“Crystal,” someone said from above me.

“Go away!” I shouted, coddling my blanket like it would erase the dream.

I cried for what felt like hours, wanting someone to hug, to tell me it was just a dream and let me sleep with them, until a light purple aura glowed around me, lifting me up. I screamed before wailing again.

I landed in a soft, warm bed, purple eyes glowing on the other side. “Are you okay?” Twilight said, putting an arm on my shoulder.

“What do you want?” I spat, trying to hide my gratitude. Unlike last time, she sounded truly concerned.

“I want to say I’m sorry for yelling at you earlier. I should have listened to what Celestia said instead of how you acted. Is there anyway I can make it up to you?”

I thought she was just saying that, but when she dried my tears and got me a tissue to blow my nose, I really felt like she cared. “Um, can I sleep with you tonight?”

“Sure, if it’ll make you feel better.” She pulled me into a hug, and I began to sniffle less almost immediately. “You know, I have a big brother I like to call BBBFF, just like you call your big sister BSBFF. If I lost him and someone snapped at me, I’d do the exact same thing you did.” She placed her head on mine as the warmth of the bed began to lull me to sleep. “I am an inconsiderate piece of shit, but I’d like to make it up to you.” I had fallen asleep at this point, silently imagining that Twilight was my Big Sister Best Friend Forever.