Segata Sanshiro VS. Luna, Sweetie Belle, and Button Mash in a clash of ages.

by MrAquino

Rating: teen
Tags: Random, Slice of Life, Crossover, Human, Comedy
Length: 1798

YOU MUST PLAY SEGA SATURN!!! Segata Sanshiro battles against Luna, Sweetie Belle, and Button Mash in a clash that every generation will remember!

The famed martial artist and defender of the Sega Saturn, Segata Sanshiro, invades the land of Equestria. Only three ponies can defeat him if they play seriously, using his own Sega Saturn against him. They are: Princess Luna (Princess of the Moon and Night), Sweetie Belle (Member of the cutie Mark crusaders and younger to the element of Generosity, Rarity), and Button Mash (Sweetie Belle's 'boyfriend' and local game enthusiast.).

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2015-03-21 17:10:01 UTC

Their Battered Bodies will never Forget.

Right above planet Earth, just above the country of Japan, a human rode a missile, saving the headquarters of Sega from their rival, Nintendo. After publicly beating up Japanese men, women, & children, breaking & entering homes while dressed up as good old Saint Nick himself, dating Sakura from 'Sakura Wars', outmatched an olympic speed skater with his bare feet, duplicate himself & increase in size, punch falling cars & space shuttles into the air, have baseballs hit his chest at 90 miles per hour & not flinch, wine the world cup by throwing a player to win the scoring goal, using hie earth shattering Judo throw that causes people to explode... TWICE, and all while having a giant Sega Saturn strapped to his back, making him practice his gaming and physical prowess. Though he could survive the vacuum of space, his only regret was being overwhelmed by zombies and the missile Nintendo released on Sega was going to explode in 3...2...1.

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Down on Earth, everyone weeped for the fallen hero Segata, while Nintendo, though failing at destroying Sega, celebrated in the defeat of the Saturn's savior. But oh those fools, they should know that, with the power of the Sega Saturn, and Segata's devotion by giving his soul to gaming have not just been able to allow him to do his feats, but they made him immortal! Death would not have his soul, ad if it did, he'd easily take Death's soul for himself! Segata floated around the galaxy, waiting patiently for when he lands, he will spread news about the Sega Saturn and beat the living shit out of anything not even playing it! Little did he know, that where he'd land in, three warriors of gaming would impress him.

Planet Equis: Location; Ponyville.

Inside a small foal's home, three ponies were playing video games together, each having a fun time while being competitive to each other. The family that owned the house hazily prepared a meal for the three, for you see young ones, one of three is a princess. Princess Luna, reformed thanks to the Elements of Harmony and allowing her to come back from the evil that was Nightmare Moon, played some video games with two subjects she's been fond over: Sweetie Belle and Button Mash. Sweetie Belle was the younger sister to Rarity, one of the bearers of the Elements of Harmony (Generosity) and an honorable Cutie Mark Crusader with it's members Applebloom and Scootaloo. Button Mash lives in the home of the family inside, making their meal, and is the colt responsible for introducing the two to Video games: the newest thing that allows ponies to play games electronically with a console, controllers, and a special box that holds the game inside. Button's Mom, Elaina, peered around the corner of the door, seeing the three play a game of Mega Mare together.

"Princess?" Elaina asked "Do you want ketchup with your hay fries?"

"That would sound lovely." Luna replied, trying not to look away from the game.

"Sweetie Belle?"

"Sound good." The filly replied, also focused on the game.

"...Button?"

"Yeah, whatever." He spoke, not even caring as his eyes were glued to the T.V. Screen. Elaina watched the three play for a moment, shrugged, then walked away. If that's what the three want, that's what they'll get! Though... what if Luna get's angry about it? Better make some mustard with that ketchup, just in case.

Out in the field, a lone pink earth pony with an even darker pink mane skipped around a field, smelling the local flowers around. They were lovely, but soon, she felt a weird tingle in her.

"OOH!" She exclaimed "What is it Pinkie!?" She stood, and only her tail twitched. "Twitchy tail?" She looked up and saw something on fire fall from the sky! She moved out of the way, dodging whatever fell from the sky and caused a huge crater in the floor. Being careful, she looked inside the crater, only to be met with a small fog coming from the smoldering ashes. An arm rose from the crater, and the legend himself arose from the ground! The mare backed up, trembling in fear as he stood up, unfazed about what just happened.

"S-Segata... Sanshiro!!!" she yelled in fear! Before she could scream. Segata grabbed her by her neck and slammed her into the ground, making a crater that was ten times the size he was in! She only twitched, followed by her wheezing every breath.

"*You must play Sega Saturn!!!*" Segata spoke in his native language, holding out a Sega Saturn. He respectfully placed the Saturn on the floor, turned around, and began his new reign of terror amongst these ponies. It didn't even matter how they knew about him, what mattered was that if they can talk, then they can play the Sega Saturn!

"Luna! Kids!" Elaina announced "Your fries are ready!" the three stopped their game and ran out, sitting on their chairs around the table and scarfed down their fries! They all enjoyed themselves, as they were very close to defeating Dr. Neighly, but were interrupted as Diamond Tiara, a local bully from school was thrown through their window, breaking the glass and destroying the table they were on!

"Diamond!?" Sweetie asked. Before Diamond could respond-

BOOM!!!

Diamond Tiara exploded!!! The blast threw them away! Luna casted a spell and caught the two foals and the mom together, landing hard and slid across the rough floor. They looked at the house, seeing it barely stand with all walls blown away, destroying all but the roof, some pillars, and Button's game console, T.V., and game still on pause.

"My home!" Button yelled

"Have no fear!" Luna replied "As Princess I shall bring in new materials and help rebuild your home!"

BOOM!!!

Another explosion came from where Diamond Tiara exploded at! Not only did she just explode miraculously from being thrown, but she exploded twice!!! They all stood there, jaws wide open, seeing nothing spared anymore.

"...OUR GAME!!!" The three yelled together in unison

"*You must play Sega Saturn!!!*" A voice yelled. They all turned and saw Segata Sanshiro, standing there with his arms folded, having a large Sega Saturn strapped to his back. Everywhere, all the towns in Ponyville moaned in pain, with many Sega Saturns around them. Segata defeated everyone here: the local residents, tourists, guards, all the men, women, & children, and the Elements of Harmony with the Princess of Friendship. Luna scolded her eyes, staring deep at Segata's area!

"Segata Sanshiro." Luna spoke.

"You know that guy!?" Sweetie Belle asked

"Yes! He is a force much greater than anything Celestia and I have defeated in our life."

"Really?" Button asked "How is he that powerful?"

"...He is my son."

Somewhere, on the moon above Equestria, a man walked out of his house and saw what just happened:

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"HE'S YOUR SON!?!?!?" The foals asked

"He is." Luna responded "I had to abandon him as a child, so I sent him away to a land where the people will be grateful of his... talents. How did you get back here, Segata!?"

"*It wasn't easy, mother,*" Segata replied "*But I saved my people from a missile fired the scum called 'Nintendo'! I was blown up, and I drifted around for years, but now, I'm back, and you must play a Sega Saturn!*"

"You and what army!?" Sweetie Belle asked.

"You shouldn't have said that!" Luna replied.

"Why?" Button asked "It's not like he's-" They all stopped, as Segata Sanshiro now had an army of himself with a giant of himself watching over his smaller selves. They all released a terrifying chant together, prepared to fight! The foals all cowered, but Luna took a step forward, prepared to meet her son in battle!

"You are not going to hurt these children!" Luna exclaimed "I brought you into this world, and I can take you out!"

"*Try me!*" all of the Segata clones replied together. They stared down at each other. Sweetie took a deep breath and walked next to Luna.

"Don't worry princess," Sweetie spoke "you're not alone in this at all! Who knows, maybe fighting will get me my cutie mark!"

"Well... if she's joint, them I am as well!" Button added, standing on Luna's opposite side.

"No button!" His mom spoke "Don't!"

"It's alright mom. You know what to do." Elaina took a sniff, and a single tear came from her face. She pulled out a remote and pressed the shiny red button on it. The ground shook, and the land now became 8-Bit looking, but was still 3-D.

"Button!" Luna exclaimed "What did you-" She stopped and saw that all three were now in Diamond armor, holding swords in their hooves.

"You brought Minecraft to the real world!?" Sweetie asked

"Just for now," Button replied. "When this is over, everything will be back to normal."

"I... I love you Button Mash!"

"And I love you, Sweetie Belle." The two hugged each other, then turned to the army of Segata Sanshiros.

"Are you both ready?" Luna asked

"We're ready!" The two replied

"Good. CHARGE!!!" The three held their swords up and charged at the army. Segata Sanshiro and his army charged right back! Now, it was only a few moments before the two clashed! Luna, leading the two, sprinted towards a clone of her son and-

Hey guys! Check it out! Sweetie Belle sings for Rarity, Vinyl Scratch, and Octavia!!!

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"That... was a close one!" Sweetie Belle panted.

"How did we get him on that rocket ship!?" Button asked "And how did you use the Kraken!?"

"Years of fishing, my little pony," Luna replied "years of fishing."

"Do... you miss Segata, Luna?" Sweetie asked

"I do Sweetie, but unlike Discord, he can't be reformed. As much as it pains me, this is the lesser of two evils. Don't want his team to win by throwing one of his goalies to score that final score, now would we?"

"No ma'am!" They both replied

"But, on the bright side, we have all these free Sega Saturns! Let's go and play some games!"

"YEAH!!!"

"Can I join?" Flash Sentry asked, crawling towards them.

"Ew!" Luna spoke "Go away! Nopony loves you!"

BOOM!!!

A smoldering crater was left, as Flash Sentry was now nothing but a pile of ash. The three awkwardly stared at each other, then laughed at the expense of Flash's life being taken away by a truthful burn.

In space, Segata Sanshiro was strapped to a rocket, heading towards another planet: Cybertron!

"*Soon,*" Segata spoke to himself "*We will meet again, father Megatron! After all... you must play Sega Saturn!*"

THE END!!!

*Insert credits thing here*

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