Pleather-bound Heart

Enigma couldn't believe how good he was feeling. He scribbled out little lines across his papers as he worked. He'd finally settled on a final design for the toy and was now just waiting for parts. He'd already measured just about everything he needed from Jadewing, all he had to do now was wait for a few of the metal bars to arrive. He was good with pleather and those kinds of materials, but metalwork had never been his forte. Luckily, ordering the parts themselves had been simple and he hoped would be arriving today.

Stacks of papers were up against the wall in the side of the room. It had been a few days since he'd been to see them, but he felt so alive. So many different designs and ideas were flooding his mind. He barely had time to start writing out one before another came to his mind. He was sure most of them would be completely useless, but he was writing each and every one of them down just in case. There was no telling what could happen or what somepony might order. For all he knew one of these quick designs would one day be the basis of a whole new line.

Even if he never built any of these wonderful devices that flooded his mind, he didn't care. He could draw each and every one of them without fear, letting his creative juices flow. He was making enough on the commission he didn't have to worry about his bills for a little bit, either. It was going to be wonderful.

His phone rang and he picked it up without thinking. “Hello, Enigma speaking.”

“Enigma? Is that you?” a voice asked. Her voice. He froze in place and stared at the phone. Every thought and emotion they'd ever shared ran through his mind. He dropped the phone as if it was on fire, staring at it with terror. He got to his hooves and backed away, too scared to switch it off. He could hear her, calling out to him. Yelling. Why won't she just leave me alone? We're done! We're over, I don't want to be with her any more. I can't be with her anymore. No no no no! Hang up, please, please hang up! He stared at the phone, willing her to hang up. Then, mercifully, her voice eventually cut off and he heard the dial tone. He let out a sigh of relief and picked it up in his magic, turning it off.

He looked at his notes, though every creative thought, every design and idea were gone. All he could think about was her. Calling him. Wanting him back. Trying to get a hold of him. He crawled to his futon and collapsed, letting out a weak sob. “Leave me alone. Please just leave me alone. I'm happy. I'm happy!” he screamed. His body was covered in a cold sweat. He pulled the blankets over himself.

A knock on the door made him freeze. It was her. She'd found him. He knew it. She'd somehow managed to track him down and now she was here. She was going to yell and scream at him. Call him a foal, tell him--”

“Equestrian delivery service!” a voice called out from outside the door. Not her voice.

He jumped to his hooves and galloped to the door, pulling it open. A pegasus stood, holding a few long boxes. “Enigma?”

“Yes! Oh yes!” he said happily, quickly signing for them. He took the packages and closed the door. The boxes were torn apart, revealing the long, thick metal poles. It only took him a few seconds to lock them together and then pull them back apart. It took everything he had not to squeal like a child as he grabbed a few large boxes in his magic. He then reached for his phone and paused. He stared at it, before slowly pulling his hoof back.

He walked out the door, leaving his phone behind.

Silverchain frowned as she pulled the door open. “What are you doing here? Why didn't you call first?” She almost instantly regretted her harsh tone as the stallion recoiled and looked at her pathetically.

“My... phone broke,” he mumbled softly. “I thought it would be okay, since I told you they'd come in today. I'm sorry...”

“You should have used a pay phone at least,” she said, before giving a slow nod. “But, we all make mistakes. Come in.” She stepped aside and let him in.

“I'm sorry. Is she here?”

“No, I'm afraid not. She will be home soon, however. If you'd like to begin setting it up?”

“Of course. It will be a while before it's ready, but I can begin work now. This was the only thing I needed.” He trotted into the toy room and started setting up the metal rods. They locked in perfectly, so tight they didn't even jiggle when he shook them and threw his whole weight into it. They made a wall-less box, with only the bottom and top having bars all along them to make squares. “I should be able to do this without... well, having her here. But...”

“Yes?”

“If she's here to test it, I can do better calibrations. Make it safer.”

“Could you adjust it after finishing it?”

“Well, yes, I suppose. I'd have to move the limiters, but--”

“Then please do it in that way.”

He nodded and got to work, pulling out the things needed. “Do you know how to make proper bondage ropes? Some pieces of this will have to be replaced as time goes on, due to use. Most of it will be fine, but, well, the pleather strips especially.”

“I can make more as needed,” Silverchain said with a smile. “I have a fair bit of experience in making my own. Though I only rarely do it. It should be simple enough.”

“Oh, okay. Thanks.” He got back to work, measuring things out and humming softly as he worked.

The earth pony watched him. After a few moments she spoke up again. “Is something wrong?”

“What? No!”

“You seems very... tense.”

“I-I'm fine.”

“You're lying.”

He flushed and shuffled his hooves a little. “I just... had a bad call before I came here.”

“A bad call? Is that why your phone is broken?”

His cheeks burned bright red and he nodded. “Y-yes.”

“Is it financial problems? I do believe our payments should have--”

“No! No no no! Nothing like that,” he said quickly, waving his hoof. “It was personal. My ex. She... called me.” He shuddered. “And I wasn't paying attention and answered. I shouldn't have answered. I shouldn't have. Should have let it go to voice mail.” He closed his eyes and took a few deep, long breaths as he tried to calm himself, before opening his eyes again.

She watched him, staring at the haunted look in his eyes. He was sitting with his knees and legs scrunched up as he worked, instinctively trying to take up as little room as possible. “Not a... pleasant break up?”

“No, I ra... I...” He coughed and shook his head. “It wasn't... it wasn't pleasant.”

“She still angry?”

“In a manner, yes. She has every right to be. I was a horrible colt friend. Just awful. She'll do much better now that I'm out of the way.”

“And she called you?”

He nodded. “I kind of... I was a really bad colt friend.”

She watched him work. His hooves were shaking as was his horn. He still cut the pleather straight. “How long ago was this?”

“Not long. A few days before you made this order.”

“Do you plan to go back to her?”

“No! Yes! I... I don't know. No. No I won't. I can't, I don't...” He sighed. “It's hard to explain.”

“Try me,” she said softly as she eyed him. Her eyes narrowed, just a little. She'd seen this type of behavior before. The shaking. The cowering. It was rarely good.

“I just... didn't feel safe around her. I-I mean, I know that's a stupid reason to leave. I'm a colt, she's a mare, if anypony should be feeling unsafe it's her. I-I mean--”

“Why, are you violent?”

“W-what?”

“Are you a violent pony?”

“No.” He shook his head. “Well, I mean, sometimes I punch my pillow. That's kind of violent.”

“Then why should she be scared of you? Did you threaten her? Hit her? Torment her?”

He shook his head. “No. Why would I?”

“Then why should she be scared of you?”

He gulped and cringed as he cut the strip of pleather a little too tight. “Because... I'm the stallion. I'm... well, the... I shouldn't be scared of her. Mares are... and stallions are... I'm the stallion so I shouldn't be scared of her.”

Silverchain nodded. “I see. Did she ever hit you?”

He cringed then. After a few moments he shook his head. “N-no. She never hit me. That... wasn't a hit. I was just being too much of a cry foal.”

“I'm sorry?”

“Nothing.” He started working on another strip of pleather. “Can I work in peace, please?”

“Of course. Would you care to join us for dinner?”

“W-what?”

“Would you care to join us for dinner? I imagine you'll be working on that thing for quite a while and I'd hate to have to eat in front of you.”

He gulped and gave a small nod. “That sounds delightful. I ummm, I'm allergic to pumpkin.”

She paused and nodded. “Well, that is fine. I do not believe we were having pumpkin tonight. Do carry on, I must go start dinner.”

“O-okay! Thank you!” he called back.

Silverchain walked into the kitchen and hummed softly as she started molding the hay patties. By the time they were ready and on the stove, she heard the front door open. “I'm in here, dear!”

Jadewing came up behind her after a few moments, nuzzling. “Missed you. How was your day?”

“Good. Very good. Stay out of the toy room for now.”

“Awwww, am I in trouble? Did I do something wrong? Sorry!”

“You're not in trouble,” Silverchain said before turning to her lover. She looked her straight in the eye. “Enigma is in there making our new toy and I do not want you to look at it until it is finished.”

The pegasus perked up, her wings going up. “Ohhhh! That just makes me want to look more, why don't I--”

“You can go in there if you want, I won't stop you. I merely... do not want you to.”

The pegasus wilted. “That's... not fair.”

“What? I am merely stating that I would be... disappointed in you.”

“That... is so fighting dirty. Fine! I won't look. But it better be worth it.”

“It should be.” She turned back to the burgers. “I've invited him to dinner as well. Go change, would you?”

“Ohhhh, I'll put on--”

“We are not attempting to woo him or get a discount.”

“Oh. Well, nothing then. Do I at least get a hug?” she asked sheepishly.

Silverchain nodded before turning to wrap her legs around the mare. “Of course.” She placed a soft kiss on her cheek before letting her go. “You can, of course, still dress up for me.”

“Ohhhh! Of course,” the pegasus said with a little wink before trotting off.

Enigma gently nibbled his burger, occasionally glancing across the table at the two hosts. Silverchain was a vault, he couldn't begin to imagine what she was thinking. Occasionally she would look at him, but her expression never seemed to change. Jadewing, on the other hoof, was the exact opposite. At least, he assumed she was. He found his eyes drawn to her more often as she talked about her day. From what he could figure out, she worked in a department store. The sleek, black dress she was wearing made him imagine it was a nice store.

“So they added yet another form, another one! Can you believe it? Now every time one of the vehicles get so much as a tiny ding on them, bam, another form they have to fill out. Celestia help us if there's a scratch that isn't reported. Sometimes I wish more things happened in this city, at least then they'd spend less time giving busywork to us.”

Enigma glanced down at his burger, afraid to speak. What if he said the wrong thing? What if she'd only invited him to be polite? She'd never invited him before. Was it because what he said about his ex? Was she trying to decide if he really was violent? What if she was going to fire him? He'd already spent most of the advance on the materials. He needed the rest to survive. What if this dinner was all a test to decide if he was worth working for them?

What if there was another thing she wanted made? Or what if she was trying to get him to like her more, so he'd give a discount? What if he was doing a bad job and she was mad at him and this was all an elaborate ruse to make him feel bad and work harder? He was already doing his best, he couldn't do any better. He wasn't talented enough. He was too out of practice. He hadn't build anything this elaborate in years, even now it was taking everything he had to avoid ruining it.

“I think you're doing an excellent job so far,” Silverchain said.

“W-what?”

“The device. I think it looks marvelous. I cannot wait to use it on my little lover. I know she is excited as well,” the earth pony spoke in a calming, matter of fact tone. A hint of red crawled up the pegasus' face.

“O-oh, thank you. I am a bit out of experience, but I'm trying my best. It should be perfectly fine for her. Safe and everything.”

“That's good. Tell me, Enigma, what is it that got you into designing these outfits?”

“W-what?”

“How did it come to be? What made you decide to make them?”

He blushed. “It's... silly. Really silly.”

“So? I would not have asked if I didn't want you to tell.”

He gulped and gave a small nod. “I... I suppose. Well, it's... it started when I was a colt.” He took a slow, deep breath. “Not all of this, I mean. I didn't do these outfits until... later. But I was kind of...” He nudged his plate a bit. “I just always felt... helpless. A lot. When I was a kid. Like... I couldn't do anything to be safe. Couldn't... protect myself. Wanted some pony to protect me. Wanted somepony I could trust to help me.” He gulped. “Sometimes I felt like I deserved to be hurt. Bullied. Things like that. I thought up little... ways to hurt myself.” He shook his head. “N-not kill myself! I wasn't suicidal! I mean, I... well... I was a little but I never had the courage to ever...” He sighed and lowered his eyes again. “I thought I could do it with dish soap. I never did it, and even if I had it would have only made me throw up. But I just... I thought I deserved to be hurt. I made up special outfits. Things. I drew some of them. They were quite elaborate. I wanted to... find somepony I could trust to show them to. Who I could... trust to use them with. Somepony who would hurt me like I felt I deserved, then decide I was... good. Like I had gotten what I deserved and could be loved then.” He sighed. “It's silly, I'm sorry.”

“No, feel free to continue. As I said, if I didn't want to know, I would not have asked.”

“W-well... I got older and I ended up actually making some of them. I... made a friend who was an amazing designer at the time. She helped me make some of them, but she honestly didn't want to be known for her arts. So everything was listed under my name and she really helped me to learn everything. I started getting a bit of a reputation through word of mouth, then my agent found me. I've been working for her ever since.”

“Oh? And where does your ex come into this?”

The burger dropped from his magic and he locked in place.

“I'm sorry, was that too much? I don't mean to pry.”

He took a deep breath and shook his head. “N-no. It's... it's fine. I d-dated her in college. We were... very close. She was... okay with what I did at first. I think she wanted me to become a fashion designer, though. I took the classes, but my skills were always in the... toys section. It was what made me happy. I don't think she liked that after a while.”

“Oh? Why not?”

“She said it was creepy and... she just...” He lowered his head. “I... I don't want to talk about her. Please.” He felt like he was going to cry and he struggled to hold it in. “C-can I go use the restroom?”

“Yes, down the hall on the left.”

He nodded and got up, trotting away quickly.

“He's going to go cry, isn't he?” Jadewing asked softly.

“Indeed. We'll pretend not to notice, of course.”

“Of course.”

“He is an interesting pony, though. He is going to need quite a bit of help.”

“He needs to see a therapist,” the pegasus mumbled.

“Most definitely. Perhaps we could suggest one to him. I think we still have the number of the one Pettycoat was seeing. He seemed like quite the interesting stallion.”

“Won't that upset him more? Maybe we should wait until after he finishes? If we tell him now, he might get upset. Especially since he'll still have to finish the toy.”

Silverchain nodded. “I suppose. Shush now, he's coming back.”

Enigma came trotting back, a smile on his face. He'd wiped all the tears away and was certain he'd managed to get all the moisture off his face. He was certain there was absolutely no possible way they could tell he had been crying. “Sorry about that, sometimes drinks just go right through me.” He sat back down and started picking up the remnants of his burger. “So, how did you two meet?”

Silverchain smiled. “Oh, I'm afraid our story is quite standard. We met through work. My work, to be specific.”

“Oh?”

“Yes. Jadewing visited my little shop, searching for a few little toys for her and her coltfriend.”

“Wait, coltfriend? I thought you were into mares?”

The pegasus snickered. “I'm bi, actually. So is Silverchain. I was trying some new things at the time and she showed me how to reallllly get rough and wild with someone. I was just getting into being a dominatrix at the time.”

Enigma gulped and nodded, his cheeks flaming red. “Y-you were... t-the dom? I figured... well... I mean, I errr...”

“I am the dominant one in our relationship,” Silverchain said with a smile. “Or the top, or whichever term you prefer. Jadewing, on the other hoof, tends to prefer to switch on her preferences, though she is usually my bottom.” She leaned over to nibble her lover's ear. “Are we making you uncomfortable?”

“W-what? No, it's, errr, fascinating. I've never known any ponies who... I-I mean, never...”

“Really? I imagined plenty of your clients would be in such relationships. Or do you usually get one time users who use your wares?”

“Yes! I mean, no. I mean, errr, I don't usually talk with them much. I usually just... do the job and leave.”

“Why? Do you find it embarrassing talking to ponies about their desires?”

He shook his head. “N-no. I've just never... I mean...”

“Really? I'd imagined plenty of your friends might have discussed this.” A grin formed on her lips. “You do have friends who were interested in this kind of thing, do you not? Ponies you can talk to?”

“N-not really. Most of my friends tended to be her friends. She didn't want me talking about these things to them. None of them even know I do these kinds of things.”

“What? That's just silly. It's your job, isn't it?” Jadewing asked, cocking an eye. “What did they think you did?”

“Designed clothing,” he muttered. “She told me to tell ponies that.”

There was silence for a few moments, the only sound the ponies eating their meals. Finally, Silverchain looked up at him, staring into his eyes. “I see. It all makes sense then. Why I've heard such... interesting things about your designs.”

“W-what? What does?”

“You've always been an outsider looking in on this life style, haven't you? No pony to discuss it with, not allowed to talk about it. No way to explore it, except for in your own mind. I imagine you've thought of all kinds of interesting designs that you've longed to try. Ones that you would have given anything to try, if your mare friend would have allowed you to.”

Enigma cringed. “I-it wasn't... like that. I mean, she just found it creepy. She had every right not to like it if she didn't,” he muttered. “It's not like... she wasn't holding me back or anything. She just didn't want to try it. That was her decision. Me trying to make her would have just been selfish of me.”

Silverchain nodded. “Indeed, it would have been. Anypony has the right to deny any sexual activity they don't feel comfortable with. But sexuality can be such a big part of any relationship. Having to suppress that side of yourself for so long can't have been easy. Many ponies wouldn't have endured it.”

“Leaving over something like that would be stupid...”

“Not all relationships are meant to be. If you have to hide the pony you are, then what hope is there for the relationship to truly blossom? If you can't be yourself around the pony you're supposed to be closest to, how can you ever be yourself at all?”

Enigma shrugged. “I guess. She was... really good though. Lots of things. She... let me make stuff. She just didn't like it. That was okay.”

“I never said it wasn't.”

He nodded and nibbled his burger.

“But that doesn't mean you'd be in the wrong for not wanting to be in that kind of relationship.”

“T-that isn't why I left,” he said, lowering his head. “I-is this why you brought me here? Why you asked me to join you to dinner? So you could interrogate me about my past relationships? It just didn't work out, okay? I wasn't happy, I was miserable. I just wanted out so I ran, okay? Are you happy now? I'm just a coward who runs from things that scares him!” He glared at her. She stared back. She never seemed to blink, she just kept staring and watching him. It didn't take long before he closed his eyes and crumbled. “W-what do you want from me? What do you want me to say?”

“Nothing. You never had to say anything you didn't want to.” She paused. “And there is nothing wrong with fleeing a bad relationship. Sometimes they aren't meant to be. If fleeing was the only way to escape... then fleeing is the right decision.”

“Fine, whatever,” he muttered. “Thank you for dinner. I... think I want to get back to work. Okay?”

She gave a nod and he jumped to his hooves and galloped from the room as fast as he could, leaving the door swinging lightly behind him.

“I think you made him a bit uncomfortable,” Jadewing said.

“Perhaps,” Silverchain said before taking a sip of her water. “I merely stated the truth. He should feel no shame in escaping a relationship that he was scared of.” She paused and looked to her pegasus, before leaning in to give her a gentle kiss on the cheek. “I would certainly hope you never feel our relationship is scary, or that you had to flee from me.”

“I sometimes find you scary, but only in a fun way,” Jadewing said before giving a nuzzle. “Like a good horror movie that you know can't happen but sometimes it's fun to believe.” She lightly fell into her lover's hooves. “Oh no, I've been captured by the evil spirit of Silverchain! Whatever shall happen to me now, eeeee?”

The earth pony snickered. “Mmmm. I believe some punishment is in order for... let's say... donning my thousand year old cursed chastity belt.”

The pegasus snorted. “You really think I'd put on a thousand year old chastity belt? Who knows where it's been?”

“Only the spirits know. But you'll know where it'll take you soon enough.”

“Eeek!”