Sweetie Bot vs Scootachicken: A Friendship is Witchcraft Fanfic
Chapter 1
"Sweetie Belle, are you sure we should be doing this? Whispered Scootaloo.
They kept their voices down because the were currently crawling along the ground floor of Twilight Sparkle's house. They weren't quite as quiet as ninja ponies, but her pet owl seemed content to continue the convenient nap they had found it in.
Sweetie Belle checked if the owl had stirred at Scootaloo's question, then replied. "Affirmative. Twilight Sparkle is sure to have the neccesary equipment to aquire chemistry cutie marks."
Scootaloo sighed. "I know that," she said. "I meant should we be doing this without Apple Bloom? We should wait until she's back from visiting her family in Manehattan."
"Negative. Waiting is inefficient." Sweetie Belle resumed crawling towards the basement stairs.
Scootaloo shook her head. "Just feels wrong without her." She replied, albeit mostly to herself. After a moment she started crawling as well.
Reaching the door, they found that it was fairly rusty, as if Spike rarely cleaned it for fear of sabotaging some experiment or another. Therefor, it creaked quite loudly. They yanked it open quickly to make as little noise as possible.
It hardly seemed to matter. The owl was apparently the deepest sleeper of all owlkind, and as loud as the creaking was, there was no way the sound would travel all the way to where Twilight and Spike were sleeping.
In truth, they weren't afraid of the owl waking Twilight. They had never heard it hoot loud enough to wake anyone. Attempting absolute stealth was more of a formality. A challenge they set for themselves.
As they descended the stairs and reached the lab, Sweetie Belle's mechanical eyes scanned the flasks and beakers that were neatly arranged in rows on the various shelves and tables. Nearly all of them were filled with brightly colored fluids and it seemed that there were at least three active experiments simmering. As Scootaloo flicked on the light, they noticed a locked drawer in the far corner. The lights were not as bright above it.
"I think we should avoid that drawer." Sweetie Belle cautioned.
Scootaloo gulped. I totally agre with you there." She turned away from the ominous drawer and a bright, michevious look replaced the worry in her eyes. She waved toward the rest of the lab. "Let's get to work."
It was easier said than done. Even barring the lack of any chemical knowledge, there was still the problem of height. The lab was designed with a fully grown, telekinetic unicorn in mind, not two little fillies. Especially when one of them is an earth-bound pegasus and the other is a novice at moving things with her magic.
This dilema confounded them for a while, which made them nervous. Every second they were stumped by this problem was another second closer to Twilight waking up and discovering the pair of interlopers. That would be... unpleasant.
Finally, Scootaloo hit on an idea. "Spike helps Twilight out sometimes, right? There's got to be a stool or something around here."
"That seems logical." Sweetie Belle agreed.
With new purpose, they searched the lab. After looking in all of the nooks in the room, they eventually found a small stepladder stashed under one of the workbenches.
They decided that, even though it would be a bit uncomfortable, the ladder was just wide enough for the both of them to stand on.. Climbing up, they carefully set to work. As carefully as they could when every now and then one of them would elbow the other while trying to reach a flask.
On the matter of the strange liquids in these vials, they could not tell what was in them due to their inabillity to understand what Twilight had written on the labels. Also, they did not care. Anything in reach was poured into the largest container they could find.
The result was a strange shade of brown, like watered down butterscotch pudding mixed with mud. Satisfied with their work, they leaned away from the table and looked expectantly at their flanks. They stayed blank.
"Looks like we're not cut out to be chemists, Sweetie Belle." Scootaloo grumbled as she hung her head. "Maybe it would've worked for Apple Bloom."
Sweetie Belle's eyes narrowed. "The accusation levels are intolerable. Appologize!"
"I'm just saying. We're supposed to all be in this together, and that means not ditching one of us when they're inconvenient."
The ladder wobbled a bit as Sweetie Belle turned to face her detractor. "You are here. That makes you an accomplice in the ditching!"
The argument had gotten loud, and they both winced as hoofsteps sounded above them. The voice of Twilight Sparkle floated down to them, "... Because, Spike, I thought I heard something."
"Come on, Twilght, it was probably just the owl. Now can I please go back to sleep?"
As the voices trailed off, Scootaloo shook her head. "Whatever. I'm out of here." She hopped off the ladder.
The sudden lack of any counter-weight caused the ladder to tip over, dumping Sweetie Belle onto her head. As she fell, she flailed and pushed the ladder with a hoof. It banged into one of the table's legs. That nudge made the mixing bowl, already dangerously close to the edge of the table, slide forward just enough to dump its contents. Scootaloo was just turning around to see if Sweetie was okay when the bowl, and all of the sludge inside it, landed on her head.
There was a deafening bang and the room was filled with smoke. If the sound of the two arguing was enough to wake her, this was definitely enough to clue Twilight in on the intruders in her lab. The door at the stairs flew open.
"What is going on in-" The question was lost as she choked on the thick smoke.
Opening the door had given the smoke a place to go and the room was quickly cleared of it. Sweetie Belle could see again. What she saw was... Scootaloo?
The pegasus had changed. She still had her wings and her head was still the same. She even remained a bright orange! But the rest of her body was obviously that of a chicken.
Before Sweetie Belle could say anything, Scootaloo let out a be-gawk and ran up the stairs. Twilight watched her as she sped past, then turned to the remaining pony. "Was Scootaloo a chicken? What is going on here, I demand an explaination!"
Sweetie Belle stood, detirmination on her face. "Expaination is inefficient. I will retrieve the Scootachicken."
She ran out into the night after her friend.
Sweetie Bot vs Scootachicken: A Friendship is Witchcraft Fanfic
Ch. 2
As Sweetie Belle galloped after the now-poultry Scootaloo, two things popped into her mind. The first was that she had just dissed Twilight Sparkle. She hadn't meant to, but it had happened. That wasn't good. Her sister had told her about Twilight's Canterlot friends.
The second was that said dissing had cost her a lot of time and now her fowl friend was way ahead of her. She sped up, racing through the clock tower's square. It almost seemed...
Yes! Scootaloo was heading to Sugar Cube Corner! But why? It would make sense for the confused bird to head towards home. The bakery was an illogical choice.
Logic aside, Sweetie Belle appeared to be in luck. Scootaloo had paused beneath a window to scratch at the ground. Sweetie Belle poured on even more speed and jumped, forelegs reaching to snag her friend.
Who promptly dove through the window. Sweetie Belle crashed face first into the dirt. Wobbily, she stood up again and massaged her head. Then she hopped in after the chicken.
Who had taken advantage of Sweetie Belle's recovery time. The kitchen was a mess. Bowls and whisks and spoons were strewn about as Scootaloo searched for sugary treats.
This cleared up the question of why the girl had made a beeline to Sugar Cube. The transformation must have used up a lot of energy, and now Scootaloo was hungry.
The mess, and the racket accompanying it, had also woken the upstairs tennent. Pinkie halted on the stairs as she saw Scootaloo's new look, and a smile broke out when she saw Sweetie Belle chasing after the ransacker.
"You know," Pinkie mused, "this reminds me of a song from the orphanage."
Sweetie Belle's eyes widened, but luckily Scootaloo chose that moment to break through another window. She followed quickly, glad to be able to leave before the upbeat dirge began. The sound of Pinkie's voice faded.
The little pony's cheer faded almost as quick when Scootaloo flapped her wings and took off. That stopped Sweetie Belle right in her tracks. Scootaloo was flying! But as happy as she was for her friend, there was no way to catch the chicken now.
Or there wouldn't have been if it wasn't for a certain prismatic pegasus' near-sightedness. Rainbow Dash clipped Scootaloo's legs and they both tumbled down, landing in a tangled heap. Sweetie Belle was able to close some of the distance as Scootaloo struggled to get out from under Rainbow Dash.
But get out she did, and Sweetie Belle found her way blocked as Dash stretched and shook the impact off.
"Whoa, what hit me?" The would-be ace asked the ground.
"Out of the way, Rainbow Dash."
That startled her. "Sweetie Belle, is that you? Where did you come from?"
The little unicorn didn't have time for Rainbow Dash's questions. Scootaloo was getting away. She darted past the pegasus.
Rainbow Dash couldn't see much, but she could track a moving white blob. Even in the dark. She lifted off and hovered after Sweetie Belle, keeping pace.
"Isn't it past your bedtime?"
Sweetie Belle sighed and humored her. "Yas, it is."
"Oh." Rainbow Dash paused. Conversations with little fillies were not her forte. "So what are you doing out so late? Besides jogging, I mean."
All her question recieved was silence, so Rainbow Dash continued. "I'll tell you what I was doing. I had the urge for a mid-night dash, so I rainbowed to town. Then I thought of a secret new trick that would let me rainbow so much cooler while I was dashing and that's what I was practicing when something hit me."
"That 'something' was Scootaloo." Sweetie Belle.
Rainbow Dash scoffed. "Come on, Sweetie Belle. Scootaloo can't fly."
"Scootaloo the chicken can."
"You named a chicken Scootaloo?" Dash squinted, confused.
Sweetie Belle shook her head. "I turned Scootaloo into a chicken. It was an error."
"Hmm..." Was all Rainbow Dash could say. While it seemed a simple enough problem, simple wasn't always interesting. Before Sweetie Belle even made it to the bridge leading to the Carousel Boutique, boredom had set in. This is so un-rainbow! She said as much when she turned around and jeted off. Maybe Twilight would have something fun going on.
For her part, Sweetie Belle wasn't sad to see her go. Rainbow Dash wasn't a very subtle pursuer. The way the chase had been going thus far, that flaw would be a huge hinderence. Scootaloo was just too quick to be caught by anything other than surprise.
As she crested the rise of the bridge all hope of sneaking up on the errant pega-chicken was... Dashed. Scootaloo had stopped, and was staring right at Sweetie Belle. As if daring her to do her worst.
Well if she wants it, Sweetie Belle thought, I'll bring it. Forgeting any tactical plans she may have come up with, the little unicorn ran at her friend. Scootaloo took a few seconds to scratch at the ground, seemingly unconcerned with the filly charging at her, until Sweetie Belle had closed to within a few feet. Then she darted to the Boutique, causing more property damage in the form of yet another broken window.
If Sweetie Belle was willing to follow the vandal into Sugar Cube Corner, she was even more so when it came to family property. And follow she did.
In the Carousel Boutique, everything was very neatly arranged, with all of the fabric folded and all of the tools of Rarity's casual hobby lined up by size. Sweetie Belle felt a twinge of regret as the Crusaders smashed through the shop. The neat fabric was torn and the scissors, needles, and thread ended up all over the floor.
There was a thump from the second story, the sound of a veteran pony falling from her bed. "We're under attack!" Rarity shouted.
Sweetie Belle didn’t have the time to deal with her sister’s war trauma at the moment. Scootaloo, having finished trashing the Boutique, dodged another lunge from Sweetie Belle and booked it out of the same window they had come in.
Fatigue was starting to set in, at least for Sweetie Belle. She had been chasing Scootaloo all around Ponyville and it seemed the chicken wasn’t done yet. Not by a long shot.
Despite her flagging energy, Sweetie Belle poured all the speed she could as Scootaloo skirted the Everfree Forest. She could see Fluttershy’s cottage hugging the tree line ahead. If the pattern held, that was where Scootaloo was leading her.
It held. Mercifully for Ponyville’s glassmakers, the windows were open. Sweetie Belle climbed in, glad to not have to jump to avoid broken shards.
Sweetie Belle had never been in Fluttershy’s cottage before, and she was regretting being here now. Even for Scootaloo. Various fetishes and charms were hung on the walls, centered around a multi-layered shrine. What was the name Rarity was always praising? Smooze? That was it. As the leader of the cult, it made sense that Fluttershy would have an altar in her house as well. One far more elaborate than Rarity’s.
At the altar was where Fluttershy was currently kneeling. Unlike the majority of Ponyville, the prophet of Smooze used the night for worship. She was so deep in her devotions, that she almost didn’t notice the chicken scratching the floor next to her. A chant died mid-syllable.
“Oh my…” Fluutershy breathed. “You shouldn’t be here.”
A spiral of dark purple spun into existence above the shrine. It warped and twisted the air around it. Sweetie Belle remembered Apple Bloom telling her about something similar happening when she was helping Pinkie bake. The unicorn backed away.
Fluttershy started quickly leafing through a thick tome, muttering. “Oh no. This shouldn’t happen, The spells not complete.”
The portal spooked Scootaloo, and Sweetie Belle gratefully followed her friend as the chicken fled the cottage. The chase was on again.
Suffering damage from mane to tail, Sweetie Belle was more trudging after Scootaloo than galloping. Had the potion given her superpowers? Come to think of it, Scootaloo normally pulled her and Apple Bloom around in the wagon, so maybe not.
Regardless, as Sweetie Belle chased her friend back through Ponyville, all she could hope is that she would be able to catch the freaky fowl soon.
They cut across the town square and headed down the dirt path to Sweet Apple Acres. Sweetie Belle couldn’t fathom what had driven Scootaloo to visit all of the homes of Rarity’s friends. Maybe one of the chemicals they had poured into the bowl? She let that train of thought fade into the distance as she followed Scootaloo along the barn wall that held Applejack’s war medals.
“What the hay?”
Sweetie Belle turned. There was the Apple family, newly returned from a round of relative visiting. Apple Bloom frowned. “Is that Scootaloo?”
That snapped Sweetie Belle back to focus. She whipped around, worried that the distraction had allowed Scoots to slip away, just in time to see the chicken be engulfed in purple. Scootaloo twisted horribly, then popped back into her normal shape. She looked around. “Where am I? What’s happening?”
“What’s happening is you two are making me waste the whole night figuring out what you put in that bowl and how to fix it.”
Everyone turned to the source of the voice. Twilight was stomping toward them and the look on her face was terrifying. Applejack walked up to her friend. “What’s going on, Twilight?” She asked as Twilight walked past her.
“These two snuck into my house and managed to use the chemicals in my lab to turn Scootaloo into a chicken!” Was the reply.
Apple Bloom turned to her friends. “You went Crusading without me?” Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle nodded glumly, embarrassed and ashamed.
Twilight loomed over them. “A princess needs her beauty sleep.”
“But you’re already so pretty…” Sweetie Belle tried.
Twilight cut her off. “True as that may be, it won’t help you. You’re not mine, so I can’t punish you too much, but you will be punished.”
They both gulped. A smile spread across Twilight’s face. “I’ve got the perfect thing…”