The Best Laid Out Plans: An April Fools Story

by Bysen

Rating: teen
Tags: Human, Twilight Sparkle, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Princess Cadance, Dark, Romance, Comedy, Queen Chrysalis, Shining Armor, Slice of Life
Length: 2068

Younger Twilight and Cadence get in a small argument over who Shining Armour loves more but know he'd never give them a straight answer. With of Chrysalis, Shining's GF before cadence they set about tricking him into a decision.

Cadence has been Twilight's sitter for quite some time and has grown quite close to the ten year old in that time. Though she's grown pretty close to her brother too and after telling Twilight she's dating Shining Armour, Cadence and Twilight get in an argument over who Shining loves more. Knowing they'd never get a straight answer out of him, they recruit Chrysalis, Shining's ex girlfriend to force an answer out of him. And zaniness ensues...

Trigger warning: Triggers. Literally. You’ll see.

No humanised alicorns were harmed in the writing of this fic. Well, maybe a little.
Sequel coming next April Fools

Published 2015-03-31 22:30:02 UTC
Last updated 2015-03-31 22:30:02 UTC

Technically Not Set in April

The two sat together on the edge of the bed, Cadence behind Twilight as the older of them brushed the little girl’s hair. Cadence had been sitting for Twilight for over a year now the two had grown quite close. Though not as close as Cadence had grown to Twilight’s older brother, Shining Armour. They’d started dating a month or so ago and she’d yet to bring it up with Twilight. Mostly because she’d been avoiding it.

But she’d have to tell her eventually, if Cadence wasn’t fifteen and Twilight just ten, she’d have considered her a best friend of sorts. And she was still pretty close to it anyway. But there are just some things someone her age talks about that isn’t quite appropriate to tell a girl that young. And what she and Twilight’s brother do was one of them. Nevertheless, it was time she knew about them.

“Hey Twilight, you know how I’ve been hanging out with your brother a lot recently. Has he told you why?” Cadence asked the girl in her lap.

“Hmm? No, I don’t think so. Why? What are the two of you doing?” Twilight asked in turn.

“Well, me and your Shining Armour have actually been going out recently.”

“Well obviously. I’ve seen you leaving with him before.” Twilight replied, unknowlingly showing Cadence just how naive she still was despite how smart she may be.

“No silly, I mean we’ve been dating. He’s my boyfriend.” Cadence replied with a small chuckle.

“Oohh….” Twilight let out in realisation. “Wait, I though he already had a girlfriend.” she said, turning back to face Cadence as she did.

“What?.” she deadpanned.

“Yeah. Her name is Quinn I think.”

“Quinn?!” she said with a small amount of anger in her voice. She then made the connection. “Oh, Quinn Chrysalis. No, they broke up a few months ago. Me and him are together now and we love each other very much.” she said happily as she smiled affirmingly at Twilight. “So… what do you think? About us dating?”

“It’s wonderful!” Twilight said cheerfully. “I bet he loves you almost as much as he loves me!” she told her sitter as she gave her a hug.

Cadence accepted and returned the hug from the smaller girl but couldn’t help but say “Well, I’d say he loves me about the same.” in both a defensive and friendly manner. At first.

That thought changed however as Twilight returned with “No, my BBBFF definitely loves me more.” as she released the hug. Cadence released her as well, but for different reasons that Twilight didn’t even know she’d caused.

“I don’t know about that…” Cadence said with a faked merry tone, trying to hide her more bitter sounding words. “Who knows, he may even love me more than you.”

“Nope.”

“Does too!” Cadence barked out. “I mean, I’m sure he still loves you alo-”

“Nope. Shining Armour loves me more than anything else in the world.” she said, still not even realising that she was getting under Cadence’s skin but simply decided to continuing anyway.

“Why don’t I ask HIM then?” Cadence demanded.

“Well of course he’d say he loves you more than I. And if I asked him, even though it’s true for me, he’d say me.”

“Right… and if we asked him together he’d just dodge the question…” Cadence said as she tapped her chin in thought. They both knew him well enough to know exactly what he’d do. “But what if we MADE him choose. Give him no other way? Then he’d have to pick.”

“But how would we do that?”

“I have an idea…” Cadence said as she leant down and whispered into Twilight’s ear. Sure, there was no one else around to hear her scheme but she knew it would be all the funner for Twilight if she did.

~ ~

“Are you sure about this Cadence?” Twilight asked as they finished putting the final touches onto the set up they’d made. “It seems a little… mean to trick him like this.”

“Don’t worry Twilight. It’ll be scary at the time but afterwards I’m sure he’ll laugh about it too.” she said reassuringly to Twilight as she finished tying her up. Not very tightly but enough that it looked good.

“Are the two of you done yet?” Chrysalis asked impatiently as she sat in front of her computer, pointing the camera towards the bed the two of them where getting tied up on.

“Just a second Chryssy.” Cadence groaned as she loosely wrapped a rope around her hands. She chose not to ask why Chrysalis has silk rope on hand. “If you want to prank Shining as much as you say you do then quit complaining.” she added with a mild amount of aggression. Neither of them really liked each other that much. “Alright. Ready!” she declared.

With that Chrysalis pressed call on her computer, sending the video chat request to Shining Armour who, thanks to Twilight, they knew would be home and at his computer at that time. The call connected and a brief second of loading later, Shining appeared on screen with no shirt on. “Hello? Whose this?”

“Why hello.” Chrysalis said as seductively, with a hint of creepy thrown in for good measure, as she could. “It’s been a while Shining Armour. It’s been quite some time since we last talked hasn’t it? What was it. Three? Four months since you broke up with me?”

“I’m hanging up.” Shining said as he shifted in his seat. A clear look of unease on his face.

“Oh, don’t hang up. I’ve got some friends here who really want to speak with you!” she said menacingly as she shifted out of the way, letting the camera see Twilight and Cadence tied up on her bed and squirming against the ropes. Fully embracing her part, Cadence at the moment flopped off of the bed and thumped onto the floor.

“What that… what are you doing to them!?” she said as he planted both his hand on the desk and rushed towards the screen. The camera now pointed more at the top of his head than his face.

“Now now Shining Armour. I’m not going to hurt… one of them.” she said with a crooked smile as she stood up and seductively walked over to Cadence, revealing herself to be dressed in nothing more than black lacy underwear that had a transparent piece of dark cloth, spotted with holes, hanging from the equally lacy black bra down over her stomach.

She reached down and harshly yanking Cadence off of the floor by her bound hands. It was clear that she was hurting her, even without Cadence acting it up even more so. She wasn’t meant to hurt either of them but honestly, it was an added bonus to this prank to do so.

“What do you want?! To get back together? Is that what this is about?” Shining yelled as he pulled back from his screen and looked directly into the camera, though his eyes constantly flicked back and forth between it and the screen.

“With you? Pfft! Hardly. I simply want to know one thing. Which of them do you love more?”

“What? Why?” he asked angrily.

Chrysalis didn’t answer at first, instead she just threw Cadence back onto the bed and sauntered towards her computer. She then reach of screen and came back saying “Because they’re the only one who gets to live.” she said coldly as she pulled a out a large knife and held it in front of the camera because turning around, bending over, pointing her heart shaped arse at the camera and crawling onto the bed.

“NO!!!!” Shining screamed in a high pitched girly manner which surprised all involved and gave chrysalis pause for a moment as all she, Cadence and Twilight tried to suppress a smicker.

“So… who will it be?” Chrysalis finally said after composing herself and coming to sit at the top of the bed. Her legs where crossed by still very open. “Do you love your girlfriend more?...” she said as she ran the flat of the knife along Twilight’s arm, doing nothing but from the camera’s angle, looking quite bad. “Or do you love your sister more?” she said, doing the same wit the knife to Cadence.

Shining was hysterical at this point. Whining and squeaking with every breath. “I don’t kn… I can’... I... “ she said as he pulled away from the camera and out of his seat.

“Choose!” Chrysalis yelled! “If you don’t, then they both die!” and she slammed the knife down into the bed, piercing a hole into it. “Uh crap…” she muttered to herself.

It was then that Shining returned to the computer “Please, don’-don’t hurt them. It’s me you want to suffer! Just… just don’t hurt them!”

“Then choose!”

“I can’t!” he yelled as he raised a gun to the side of his head. The three girls all went quiet for a second before twilight was the first to start screaming even louder. “Don’t hurt them! I’ll kill myself but please don’t hurt them!”

“Wait, hold on second!” Chrysalis said as she began to crawl off of the bed. “I won’t kill them!” that was all he needed.

BANG!!!

The sound didn’t fully transfer over the speakers but the screams of Cadence and Twilight was much louder than the gunshot could’ve possibly been. Quickly slipping from their loosely bound ropes, both of them flopped off of the bed and rushed over to the computer. “Shiny!...” both of them wailed as they began to cry. It went on for a few moments before from behind them, they heard slight chuckles.

They turned around to see Chrysalis trying and failing to hold in her laughter. At which point she realised they’d noticed and just let it go. She bellowed loud and hard at what had just happened. Cadence stood from the computer and was about to kill her when she heard chuckling from behind her again. this time coming over the speakers.

She turned back around to see Shining peering up from the side of the camera and also trying to hold back his laughter. And he too, once seeing them seeing him just let it go. “Oh my god! You’re alright!” Twilight said as she hugged the computer screen.

“Of course I am. And that’s what you get for trying to prank me like that!” he said loudly and sterny.

“You knew?!” Both Twilight and Cadence said at once.

“Yep.”

“What? How!? But what about the gun!?” Twilight asked.

“Cap gun. Looks real huh?” he said as she showed it off to the camera. “Loud as hell. Cost a lot too. But totally worth it. Thanks for the heads up Chryssy.”

“Would you people stop calling me that.” she said folding her arms.

“You told him? Why? I thought you wanted to get back at him for breaking up with you.”

“I don’t like Shining Armour. But I don’t like the girl who stole him up afterwards even more. I couldn’t turn down such a golden opportunity when it was dropped in my lap.” she said with a smirk.

Shining however still had a trick up his sleeve. “And neither can I. Jokes on you Chryssy too.”

“Huh?”

“You’re now trapped in a room with two very angry girls with a grudge. Have fun with her you two!” he said as he switched off his camera. Both Twilight and Cadence turned from looking at the screen to each other. A sly smile slowly crept onto their faces before they turned towards Chrysalis.

“Wait… it was just a prank. You were going to do it to him. No harm right? Right?! ARRRGGGHHHH!!!!!”

Little did they know, Shining had only turned his camera off. The call was still open and he was recording everything.

The en… wait. Three hours later.

“So we’re in agreement then.” Chrysalis said to the other two girls. “Next year we’re going to get back at him even harder.”

“Agreed.” both Twilight and Cadence said.

“Good. now could you untie me from this street post?”

“Hmm… maybe tomorrow.”

The End.

“COULD YOU AT LEAST TAKE AWAY THE “FREE TO A GOOD HOME” SIGN!?!?!?!?”

Author's Note

Deleted scene: A girl in a very fluffy pink coat then walked by Chrysalis. *gasp*