What color's that pill again?
Author’s Note: Edited by the most honorable and awesome Sharp Logic
Down in the basement rumpus room of Friendship Rainbow Castle, a small purple dragon carefully opened the lid of a large white box. His forked tongue clamped firmly between his lips, with the tips of his nimble claws he slowly extracted an object from within the nondescript container. Gazing down reverently at the shiny black cube revealed, a silly grin split his chubby features. Then, turning slowly around, he waddled over to the large televiewer screen that Twilight had bought only weeks earlier, and gingerly deposited the cube next to it. Squinting through one reptilian eye, he studied its alignment with the massive screen, adjusting its position minutely until a noise behind him made him cringe.
“Oh, c’mon, Paladin!” whined a brown coated colt with a two-toned brown mane topped by a propeller beanie. “Hook it up to the TV already!” The foal unceremoniously grabbed the white box between his hooves and tipped it over. Its remaining contents spilled out onto the coffee table.
Spike sighed and turned around. A look of horror crossed his features when he saw the mound of arcanotronic components and memory crystals.
“AUUUUGH! BEM, you idiot! You’ll scratch the finish on the controllers!” He knelt in front of the coffee table, frantically sorting components.” He gave the colt a dirty look. “You’ve already tangled the cables! Twilight is going to kill me!”
The foal shrugged then tilted his head the way he did whenever a strange notion entered it.
“Hey, don’t princesses get an executioner for stuff like that?” A feral grin split his muzzle. “They wear a black hood, with only their eyes showing, and then they cut off your head with a big axe like this –” he made a downward scything motion with his forelegs, “– and it falls into a basket – in a pool of your own blood! Then they hoist it onto a pike and hang it at the castle gate for everypony to see! Heh, heh, heh!”
The dragon shook his head as he tried to wipe scuff marks off of the controller pads. “Geez, Louise! Twi’ll worse than kill me! She’ll forbid me from ever touching this game console again, for the rest of my life!”
Unconcerned, Button Mash picked up one of the other controller pads, examining it from all angles. “And dragons live a long time,” he said. “Yadda, yadda, yadda. I get it. I got it the first ten times you used that lame excuse, Paladin.”
“C’mon, BEM! You know I had to swear to a list of promises as long as my arm before Twilight would let me try out this game console!” He lifted a controller and shook it in the colt’s face, “and you have no idea what these puppies cost!” The dragon stepped away from the coffee table. The pile had been sorted into discrete bunches: controllers, game crystals, cables, and documentation.
“You don't either, Paladin,”– the colt’s smile turned giddy as he hopped excitedly in place –”because it’s a prototype!” He stopped abruptly and his expression grew serious. “And you, Paladin, are the very best pal a stallion could have, ever!” He offered a raised hoof.
The dragon looked at the excited pony and just couldn’t manage to keep his mad on. He curled a claw into a fist.
“Game brothers, forever!” They recited in unison, and bumped extremities.
The dragon smiled and raised an eyebrow. “BEM, you may be my GBBFF, but don’t you ever forget that from amongst all my friends in Ponyville, I invited you to try out this game with me!”
The little pony and dragon looked at each other awkwardly.
“Hey Spike! This is getting awfully bromantic. Let’s game!”
The dragon breathed a sigh of relief. “Yeah Button! Good thinking!”
The colt began to examine the crystals one at a time, reading the brightly colored labels out loud. “Equestrian Rainbow, Math Muffins, Reading is Foaldamental, Geography Jumping, Magic Schoolwagon...” He looked up in disgust. “Paladin! Are these are all educational titles?”
Spike nodded enthusiastically. “Yeah! The manufacturer has this bright idea to get foals to learn stuff by gamifying educational content. Twilight was asked to beta test these and check them for accuracy. But we get to play with them too! Aren’t we lucky!?”
Button Mash looked at him as if he’d gone crazy. “But these aren’t games!” he declared. “They’re homework disguised as games!” He listlessly poked through the remaining crystals.
“Geez, BEM, at least give ‘em a chance before shooting ‘em down!” Spike connected the controllers one at a time to the console using the correct mana conduits, then popped in a power crystal.
“What’s the point?” said Button Mash, sitting down abruptly onto his haunches. He held another crystal up to the light to read the label. “Titillating Titrations...” he read, sounding perplexed.
“That’s alchemy,” added Spike as he affixed the largest of the mana conduits to the back of the box and then into a socket on the side of the large televiewer. “Sr. High curriculum stuff. Okay, almost done! We just need to add a game crystal.”
Button Mash lifted up the very last of the game crystals, eyebrows raised. “Say Paladin, what’s this?” he hoofed it over to the dragon.
“SIMians” read Spike. “I dunno. Maybe it has to do with monkeys.”
The foal rolled his eyes. “Well, at least it won’t be test-tubes, beakers and cruci-balls!”
“Crucibles,” corrected Spike.
“Whatever!” replied Button Mash. “How about we try that first?”
“Sure,” said Spike. He placed the crystal into the game receptacle at the top of the unit, and pressed the on buttons of both the console and the TV. The screen lit up, showing the Sanhe Neighstation and Arcanotronic Arts logos. Button grabbed one of the controllers in his hooves. Spike took another, and with a grin of expectation pressed the big red candy-like button at the top of the controller.
Harps strummed and a girlish voice sang out “My little pony, my little pony! Ahhh, ahhh, ahhh, ahhh, ahhhhh!”
Rick looked at Peter, utter disbelief on his round asian face.“You shouldn’t have,” he deadpanned.
Peter laughed. “Hey, it’s your birthday, Jabber!” He smirked. “Nothing but the very best for my brotha from anotha motha!”
“Can the ebonics, Wolfy,” said Rick with a wry smile. The two had been fast friends ever since junior high-school where both boys of mixed heritage, feeling isolated from mainstream social circles, had discovered a kindred soul in each other. They had each helped the other cope both at school with bullying and at home when family cultures clashed. The years had only deepened their friendship, until they had decided to simultaneously leave home and share an apartment.
The saccharine opening theme of the game played through, making a mockery of the wicked looking larping gear scattered about the cramped apartment they shared. Rick hung his head. “And I meant it. You really shouldn’t have.”
Peter just laughed the harder. “Come on,” – he pointed to the bookshelves bursting with games boxes – “do you know how hard it is to find a game you haven’t played?”
Rick shook his head. “And I thought we had an agreement, no dating sims or kids games.”
Peter crossed his arms. “Yeah, we did. But this isn’t one of those.”
Rick turned his attention to the TV screen. A pink pony was pronking like an antelope around a crowd of other brightly colored ponies. He shook his head. “You know three-out-of-four dentists recommend brushing and flossing after exposure to this shit.”
Peter’s smile faltered. “Man, don’t be like that! This game is actually supposed to be a lot more fun than the original SIMs. There are three three types of ponies – well four actually, if you count the alicorns – each with different magical abilities. And they need to cooperate in order to bag the bad guys, who include sorcerers, shape shifters, mythical creatures, and all sorts of cool shit like that.” He scratched his ‘fro, frowning. “Look, if you really don’t like it I can return it for a partial credit.”
Rick felt torn. He was never shy about telling his friends not to be real dickwads, the kind that refuse presents and make people with good intentions feel bad. And neither him nor Peter had any money to spare as both held only part-time jobs. Their biggest worry was just getting next month’s rent. Rick knew just how much Peter had had to scrimp to hoard the purchase price of a game. Loath to disappoint his friend, he shook his head.
“That would be a waste. And it does sound kind of like an OK RPG. How’re the controls and the combat system?”
Peter smiled. “Actually, it’s pretty well thought out.” He passed Rick a controller. “See, there are things that only specific types of ponies can do, like pegasi can fly, and things that everypony can do, like hold a sword in their mouths.”
“Everypony?”
Peter’s skin was light enough that a blush could sometimes show through, as it did this time.
A predatory grin split Rick’s face. “You’re not a brony, are you?” he teased.
Peter avoided his gaze by staring at the screen.
“Oh! My! God!” said Rick. “You totally are!” His jaw dropped in mock amazement. “When did this happen?”
Peter squirmed and looked uncomfortable. They’d been friends since high school and rarely could keep secrets from each other. “After I bought the game for you I thought I’d watch some of the episodes, just to do research, you know!”
Rick nodded theatrically. “Oh, of course. Just being thorough!” He raised a single eyebrow.
Peter smiled sheepishly “And then... I got hooked!”
“Aw, man!” Rick clenched a fist covered his eyes with the back of his forearm. “Another adventurer takes an arrow in the knee!”
Peter rolled his eyes. “Oh, yeah!? Well, forewarned is forearmed. Prepare to have your flank bucked, Jabber!”
“You always say something like that, before every game, dog!” He grinned at his friend. “And thank you for the birthday present, Mr. Wolf!”
Peter’s grin came back. “Gratitude delayed is better than no gratitude at all, I guess.” Peter grinned back, and pressed the bright red button on the controller.
Button Mash galloped down the stairs and into the rumpus room. At long last! he chortled as he turned on the televiewer, reinserted the SIMians crystal in the game console and turned it on as well. Grabbing the two controllers stacked neatly next to the TV, he pirouetted and jumped clear over the coffee table. Sitting on his haunches behind it, he was already restoring their previous game by the time Spike trotted down the stairs carrying a bowl of potato chips, two sodas and a small plate of gems on a tray. He placed the snacks on the coffee table.
“Paladin, how can you eat glass and not, like, die?!” asked Button Mash without looking away from the televiewer.
“They’re not glass,” said Spike, picking up his controller pad. He popped a ruby into his mouth and chewed with an expression of bliss on his scaled face. “They’re gems, and they’re a gift from Rarity!” he exclaimed.
Setup completed, the TV screen split into two areas, one for each player. Each one showed a large apish creature covered in rather elaborate and garishly colored clothing. It was the kind exaggerated body covering Sweetie Belle’s sister Rarity peddled from her nauseatingly frou-frou boutique. The thought reminded him of something scandalous Snails had told him.
“You know, it’s really weird for you to like an adult mare so much!” declared the pony. With his lips he pulled a potato chip from the bowl and with a toss of his head flipped the whole chip into his mouth. He chewed noisily as his simian began to play a video game on the screen.
Spike’s simian pulled on a jacket and left his apartment.
“I don’t expect you to understand a relationship based on mutual respect when you see one!” said Spike hotly. “The only girl you ever seem to notice is Sweetie Belle, and that’s only because she’ll play video games with you.”
“Hey! I resent that!” said Button. “She also helps me do my homework.” His simian began to twitch in a characteristic fashion, so he directed him to the bathroom.
“Wow, BEM, you’re a real life Romeoats McRomancepants, aren’t you?!” Spike’s simian took a bus into town.
Button’s eyebrows raised. “Snnrrkkkt!” He snickered as a grin spread over his face. “Hey! I just realized that if we marry those sisters, then that’ll make us brothers-in-law, like, for real!”
Spike eyebrows also shot up. “Snnnrrkkktt!” He smiled broadly “That would be pretty cool!”
“Yeah.” Button’s simian went back to playing video games. “Wouldn’t that make Princess Twilight into a relative of mine?” He munched pensively on another potato chip. “And that would also make her, like, Rarity’s mother-in-law!”
There was a crash behind them.
They turned around to see Twilight standing at the foot of the stairs, eyes wide as dinner plates, a dropped mug of coffee spilling its contents over the basement’s shag rug.
“Muh, muh –” she swallowed “– mother-in-law?” She looked down at the coffee cup as if seeing it for the very first time. It levitated into the air with a jerk. There was a flash and the coffee stain on the rug was gone. Twilight smiled crookedly at the young gamers.
“Enjoy your game, boys,” she said in a high pitched voice. Turning abruptly, she galloped back up the stairs. While Spike gawked at Twilight’s departing form, his simian exited the bus and entered a large office building.
“You know,” he said with a frown, “it kinda looks like she hadn’t ever thought about that before.”
“I'm not surprised,” said Button Mash. “Most ponies are pretty good at ignoring stuff they don’t wanna see!” He glanced at Spike’s side of the screen. “Hey! Is that that an employment office your monkey just went into?” he asked in disbelief.
“These simians are apes, not monkey,” said Spike. “They don’t have tails. And if we want them to buy some of the really cool mods to their housing, then they need more income than just doing odd jobs.”
“Dude! You are taking this game way too seriously!” said Button. The colt glanced a moment at Spike. His simian dropped its game controller and hurried out of the tiny apartment.
“Where’s your mon... er, ape, going?” asked Spike.
“A simian doesn’t live by bananas alone!” said Button Mash. “Sometimes, he has to par-tay!” He laughed when he saw Spike’s blush. Button’s simian licked a paw before using it to comb its hair.
“You got a job!?” exclaimed Peter, his mouth hung open in disbelief. On the large LCD TV his chosen avatar, a small brown colt, trotted down the main street of Ponyville. A small dragon shape kept pace with him.
“Yeah!” said Rick. “I dunno what went over me, but I just went in on a whim. I filled-in some papers, and just as I handed them in there happened to be a guy there talking with the advisor. She waved me over, and two minutes later I’m in a conference room being interviewed! Ten minutes later, I have a job.” He shrugged and smiled. “Just like that, I’m a trainee web content specialist!”
On screen, his dragon avatar led the brown colt into a flower shop they traded coins for two huge bouquets of flowers. “Now I can save up for some courses. I’ve been thinking of getting an IT certificate.”
On screen, the pony and dragon left the shop and separated, each carrying their own bouquet.
“Man!” said Peter. “I’m impressed!” His pony avatar walked up to a house and entered without knocking.
Rick glanced in Peter’s direction, a feral grin on his face. “And guess what?” The dragon on the screen entered a rather improbable looking tree-shaped castle. “My new boss said they’ll be looking for a technical writer. I told him you had worked for two years doing documentation at that web commerce company before they went bust.” The dragon ran up the stairs and passed through a huge ornate door.
A feral grin split Rick’s face. “You’ve got an interview next Wednesday.”
The look on Peter’s face was priceless. “Dude! That’s... that’s amazing!” On screen, his pony avatar walked up to a light tan coated mare with brown tresses and a baby bottle for a cutie mark. He offered her the flowers and was immediately rewarded with a hug.
On his side of the screen, Rick’s avatar marched up the stairs leading to a throne and deposited the flowers in the lap of the purple alicorn princess, who drew the little dragon up into her forelegs in a fierce embrace.
Rick’s eyesight was getting blurry. He sighed and leaned back. “Man, I never figured a game could make me do something so sappy!” he whispered.
Peter put down his controller. “Yeah dude, me neither. But I’m glad we did it.” On screen, his avatar sat down to supper with its mother. There was no father figure present, an absence that reminded him of his own life since second grade. “It’s funny how a game...”
Rick glanced at him when Peter didn’t finish his sentence.
“Yeah,” he said. “It is.”
They looked at the screen together in silence. It was a while before Rick rose. He looked at Peter, who nodded. Without a sound, he turned off the console and left his friend to the privacy of his own thoughts in the darkened living room.
“I can’t believe you got your sim a job at the same company as mine!” said Spike.
“Nah!” drawled Button Mash. “I just think whichever unicorn spellcast this crystal was a lazy hexster at best. It was probably some junior grade wizard’s apprentice, with more time than imagination!”
“I’m not so sure,” said Spike. “You gotta admit, the enchantment quality of this game is pretty snazzy! It’s a really first rate production, so I think the same office deal was done on purpose, maybe to force players to interact in-game.”
“Whatever you say, Professor Paladin!” said Button.
Spike sighed. Their simian avatars walked around on screen, sometimes pausing at their designated desks, sometimes getting up and interacting with the NPCs.
In the corner of his eye Spike saw the gleam of Button’s teeth, bared in a wide smile.
“Hey,” said the pony, “wouldn’t it be cool if these sims were hexsters working at a gaming company!?”
Spike smiled back. “Yeah! That would be cool!”
Button’s sim on screen spent a long time conversing with a sim mare. They had figured out that the adult female mares were more rounded than the males. Most even had a pair of roundish lumps on their upper torsos, somewhat like minotaurs or centaurs.
“Hey, I think she likes me!” said the colt, waggling his eyebrows.
“Oh, yeah? She spent way more time talking to me before,” Spike sniffed, turning his nose in the air.
“Weeell, if you’re such a love machine, how come you haven’t gotten Rarity to go on a date with you yet?”
Spike’s face reddened and his jaw dropped open. Then his shoulders hunched up and he dropped the controller onto his lap. Turning fully towards Button Mash, he bared his teeth. “What did you just say!?” he snarled. Steam began to leak from the green fans of his ears.
“It’s just that from my vantage point, it seems that you have done nothing but strike out with that mare.” Button Mash squinted in his direction. “By the way, did you know that when you growl your fangs show?”
Spike’s jaw moved soundlessly, obviously on the way to a major eruption, when all of a sudden a sly look crossed his features. His shoulders relaxed and he presented the colt a predatory grin. “Oh, you mean like the way you really impressed Sweetie Belle, Mr. Brainfreeze Crybaby McBawlerson!” Spike’s eyebrows rose as he smirked. “Rarity told me all about how Sweetie was embarrassed by your decidedly un-gentlecoltly behavior during your so-called date at Sugarcube Corners.”
The pony first cringed, then his eyes narrowed as well.
“Oh, yeah?” Button pointed to the female avatar on the televiewer screen. “I bet I can get her to go dancing with me!” he drawled.
“Well, I bet I could get her to go the movies with me first !” retorted the dragon. He looked at the pony, one eyebrow lifted high.
A wicked grin split the colt’s face. “You are so on!” he replied.
Spike’s eyes narrowed.
“Let the wooing begin!” he declared.
Button Mash squinted as the televiewer. “Hey! where’d she go?”
Purple dragon claws flew over the controller. Spike’s avatar rushed out of the office and ran to the office cafeteria. He chortled. “You snooze, you lose!”
The female avatar was in line at the lunch counter. Spike’s avatar offered to buy her lunch, which she accepted just as the colt’s avatar joined the line behind them.
“You sneaky little so-and-so!” said button as his avatar bought his own lunch.
Spike’s avatar led the female to a table for two. They sat. A moment later Button’s avatar pulled a chair over to join them.
“No way! This is a private lunch, buttinscolt!” As Spike’s avatar rose to push the third chair away from the table, Button’s sat down in his own freshly vacated one, placing his own lunch on top of Spike’s. Spike’s eyes widened. “Hey! No fair!”
“All’s fair in love and war,” quoted Button Mash.
Spike growled again. Onscreen, his avatar picked up the Button’s tray and tossed it onto the floor.
“Whoa! You just tossed your lunch! Button laughed. His avatar began to eat the food from Spike’s tray.
Spike turned a darker shade of purple. “You... you... aughhh!” His avatar pushed his tray onto the lap of Button’s avatar. The female avatar stood and left the table and then the cafeteria.
“Good going, stupid!” said Button. “Now she won’t want to date either one of us!”
Spike’s chin trembled. He put his controller down and slowly walked up to the console. With the stab of a purple claw he hit the on/off button. The image on the screen dissolved into random static.
“That was uncalled for!” Button tossed his controller onto the coffee table. It skidded off and fell to the shag rug.
Spike turned around. He stared at the controller on the rug.
“I’ve had enough! Go home, Button,” he said quietly.
The colt’s head reared back. “Hey! It’s just a game!” said Button. “What’s the problem?”
Spike didn’t look up. “Yeah. It’s just a game, and I’m tired of it now.”
The pony rose to all fours. His ears drooped. “Hey, Spike. I’m sorry. I didn’t think it was such a big deal.”
Spike didn’t answer for several seconds. He just stood in front of the televiewer. “Yeah. I know. Just... go.”
Button nodded. “See you, Paladin.” When the dragon didn’t respond he swallowed, and galloped up the stairs and out of the rumpus room.
Rick sighed. Somehow the brightly colored ponies onscreen weren’t keeping his attention. He felt the heat of anger, amplified by more than a little shame. With a glance he saw that Peter was leaning against the sofa back, his long body straight and stiff as a board. They still hadn’t discussed the incident. Maybe it’s time to change that, he thought.
“You know,” – Rick put down his controller – “since I’m still in the probationary period they’ll probably fire me!”
Peter flinched. “Well you didn’t have to overreact the way you did!” He put down the controller and sat up straight. “Shit, man, it was just some girl we don’t even know!”
“Yeah!” Rick’s voice rose. “A girl I was trying to get to know!” His hands clenched and unclenched. “How could you move in on me like that!?”
“Oh, come on!” said Peter, growing shrill. “I was just giving you a chance to show some character! Do you actually think I would make a play on a girl you’d started a move on?”
“And don’t you think I haven’t seen the looks you’ve been giving her at the office?” Rick crossed his arms. “Don’t pretend you weren’t interested!”
“As if a little princess like that would be.” Peter turned his head to gaze out the window.
“What do you mean, a little princess?”
“I mean someone who has a rich daddy and normally wouldn’t give guys like us the time of day.”
“Oh, yeah?” Rick got up from his chair, frowning at Peter, his mouth a thin slash. He trembled slightly as he looked at his friend.
“Yeah! This is just like in the game, Jabber.” Peter pointed at the blank screen. “I can’t believe you’re still after that seamstress! What’s the point? Your avatar is pre-teen at best and she’s an adult.” He snorted. “It’s impossible to start off with, and this game probably has a lolicon filter anyway. You’re beating your head against a wall.”
Rick shook his head. “Screw the game! None of that matters anymore anyway,” he spat. “She probably thinks I’m a jerk now. The only question is whether she complains to management and I get fired.”
Peter shrugged. “Or they could just fire me. I was the instigator after all.”
“And I was the one who overreacted, thanks to you!” retorted Rick. He stalked out of the living room and, grabbing his jacket, left the apartment.
Spike warily led Button Mash to the rumpus room sofa. He methodically turned on the televiewer and console, then took his own seat at the end of the sofa opposite the colt, who already had his controller in-hoof.
The pony looked at the dragon askance. “Hey, Paladin. I –”
“– Let’s just play the game, okay?” interrupted Spike, his voice low.
The colt stared at him for a few seconds, then his withers slumped.
“Yeah, Paladin. Got it.”
On-screen, the two SIMian avatars were sitting on chairs in front of an NPC seated at a desk. Text scrolled across the bottom of the TV.
“Well at least they’re not firing us,” commented Button.
The grilling was over and the avatars left the supervisor’s office to regain their own desks. On the way the female NPC paid them no attention, even when Spike’s avatar passed by her desk.
NPCs circulated around both their desks. All this time Spike gazed quietly at the screen, his claws immobile as they clutched the controller.
“Paladin,” called the colt. “Why aren’t you playing?”
The dragon put down his controller. “I just don’t feel like playing this anymore,” he said.
“We can try one of the other games, then!” suggested Button.
Spike shook his head. “I don’t feel like playing any of the games, anymore.” He put the controller down and waddled to the base of the stairs.
“Turn off the equipment when you’re done. I’ve got some work to do in the library.” He began to climb, then paused halfway up the stairs. “I’ll leave instructions with the guards that you can come play here when you want. You don’t need to ask me first.”
With that, he disappeared out of the door.
Button Mash looked at the most advanced gaming system he’d ever seen. Something that would probably only be available for sale years from now. Something only a magical princess, or her dragon assistant, would likely have in their basement. A few minutes later, he arose and turned off the TV and game. At the top of the stairs he looked back once in regret, and then shut the door to the rumpus room and left the castle.
They weren’t fired. The boss chewed them out, but said they had one last chance to finish their probation.
When they got back to their desks, Rick sent an email to Peter.
“Yo, Peter.
It looks like we can keep our jobs after all. That means that at the end of the month we will both have enough income to afford our own apartments, don’t you think? I can move out if you would rather keep the current apartment. Since the lease is in my name then we can sign a sublease in your name. I’ll start looking for an apartment of my own.
Rick”
Rick looked at the screen for a long while before sighing and hitting the send button. He heard the beep from across the room as Peter’s workstation received the e-mail.
The lobby doorbell rang.
“I’ll get it!” called Rick. That’s the most I’ve said to him in three days, he thought. Peter was in the kitchen doing something. Even in a small apartment there was room for them to avoid each other all day long.
He walked to the door and pressed the button. The entrance buzzer rattled and sputtered, and then footsteps approached up the two-and-a-half flights of stairs. Without looking through the peephole, Rick unlocked the door and swung it open.
It was the girl from work.
“Uh... hi, Alana! What’s up?”
The petite blond smiled brightly. “Oh, I was walking by and remembered I hadn’t invited you and Peter to my party next Saturday night.”
“Really?” Rick stared at the girl. “Uh, I mean, wow! That’s really nice, especially after... well, –” he looked at his feet, “– I made such a mess of your lunch the other day.”
She laughed brightly. “Oh, I have to apologize for how I reacted.” She blushed. “I’m still in my probationary period for another two weeks, and I sorta need this job, so I... wanted to apologize for giving you the cold shoulder.”
Nonplussed, Rick looked up into very wide and sincere deep blue eyes. “Er... no... no problem,” he stammered out.
She smiled. “Great! So that means you and Peter will come to the party?”
“Of course we will!” said Peter. Rick turned in surprise. His friend stood in the entrance to the kitchen. “And this time I won’t make an ass of myself. I promise!” he said.
“Wonderfull!” said Alana. She gave Rick a slip of paper. “Next Saturday at eight. See you then! Bye!”
Rick waved and then shut the door. He listened as her footsteps echoed up the stairwell until she reached the lobby and left the apartment building. He turned to see Peter still standing in the kitchen entrance, grinning. Nodding once, he went back in.
Rick stared at the space where Peter had vacated, deep in thought.
Spike turned on the game console. The garish SIMians display filled the televiewer. He directed his avatar to Button Mash’s avatar’s desk space. His expression grim, his claws flew over the controller. So concentrated he was that he almost jumped out of his skin when a voice whispered in his ear.
“Spikey-wikey! How’s my very favorite young gentlecolt dragon?”
Rarity stood behind the sofa, her perfume making him feel light-headed.
“Oh, hi, Rarity!” He gulped and put the controller down. “I’m fine, thanks! What brings you to the castle rumpus room?”
The mare trotted around the sofa and sat down next to him, her proximity making Spike’s heart beat faster.
“Oh, a friend told me you might be here, and that you enjoyed playing with that contraption. Do you think you could show me how it works?” She picked up a controller in a delicate white hoof.
Spike couldn’t believe his luck. “Of course I want to... I mean of course I can.” He pointed to controls on the device. “This is the on/off button. And this is...”
Spike smiled brightly as he showed the mare how the game worked. She caught very quickly, and even made a decent start. Spike’s heart skipped a beat when she chose an avatar that looked just like the female SIMian who he and Button Mash had fought over. He blushed at the thought, but didn’t say anything about it as he and Rarity played on.
For over an hour, Spike was in heaven! Then, with a chaste kiss to his forehead, she left.
For a long while after she left he sat on the sofa, wrapped in the residual scent of her perfume, a silly grin on his chubby face.
Then he got an idea, and picked up a controller.
“So Larry tells me that I passed my probation, too,” said Peter. “He also told me you came to see him, and told him the lunch debacle was really your fault. He said if you hadn’t told him he would’ve fired me. Thanks!”
Rick looked away. “Don’t mention it.”
“So,” continued Peter, “now that we each are making enough money to have our own apartments, I can move out as soon as I find another place. After all, the lease here is already in your name.”
Rick scratched the back of his head. “Yeah. About moving out. There’s no hurry right?”
Peter’s forehead wrinkled. “Well, there’s no rush, I guess.”
“You know, I was thinking.” – Rick pursed his lips – “If we just keep the status quo going, we’ll be able to save up some money. Maybe we could do some courses or something.”
Peter smiled. “Or buy new suits of armor!”
“Yeah! Maybe!” Rick held out a clenched fist at arm’s length in front of him. “Here’s to roomies!”
Peter raised his own fist and bumped Rick’s with his knuckles. “Roomies it is!”
“By the way,” said Rick with a smirk, “I know you went into the game by yourself, and that set my dragon up for a visit from his lady friend. It was... very G-rated, but somehow quite fulfilling. This is one weird game you bought me, bro! It’s even weirder that I like it so much.”
“I know. Maybe it just lets out the little purple dragon hidding inside your otherwise shower -worthy dudeness.” Peter raised a single eyebrow. “Shall we play a round?”
Rick moved to the sofa and picked up a controller. “Why not?!”
He pressed the on/off button as Peter took his own controller and sat down. The cheesy intro music played. His expression grew serious. “Peter, promise me you’ll kill me if I start singing that song.” His fingers flew over the controller as Peter laughed.
Button Mash was sitting as his desk doing homework when his mother called from the hallway.
“Sweetheart! You have a visitor!”
His eyes rolled back in his head. Homework wasn’t his thing. In fact, he was falling behind most of the rest of the class, a fact Cheerilee had discussed with his mom. And it isn’t any easier to study with all the interruptions! he thought. With a sigh he stood back from his books, and trotted towards the entrance.
“Mo-om! Please use my name when other po –”
Sweetie Belle was standing at the door next to his mom, who had the most embarrassing smirk he’d ever seen on her face.
– nies are around.” He grinned sheepishly at the filly.
“Hi, Button,” she said as if her visiting his house was an everyday event.
“Er, hi, Sweetie Belle. It’s been a while. What brings you to my place?” He scuffed the floor with a forehoof. She had barely said a word to him in weeks.
She pulled a saddlebag from her back and extracted some books. “Somebody told me you’ve been having a hard time with your homework. And I kind of was wondering if I might help you some.”
Behind the filly his mom was nodding her head a bit too enthusiastically for Button not to cringe. Seeing his expression Sweetie lost her own smile. She nodded and began putting her books back in her saddle bag.
He swallowed. “Of course I’d like your help!” The way his voice cracked as he said it made him wince. Luckily neither his mom nor Sweetie Belle seemed to notice.
“How about you kids go to Button’s room and get started,” said his mom. “I’ll go get you some cookies and juice.”
Button watched as the filly walked past him and into his room. A sudden thought struck him.
Some...body?
He smiled.
Thanks, Paladin!
He followed Sweetie into his room.
Seated at the huge desk in her office, Princess Celestia removed her pince-nez glasses and put down the friendship report from Twilight. She considered carefully for a moment, then levitated her quill, dipping it into a pot of black ink and then bringing it over a fresh sheet of vellum.
To my most faithful student, Twilight Sparkle,
Let me begin by saying how impressed I am with your investigation into interdimensional communications! It seems like barely a few hundred years ago that Starswirl the Bearded made great strides in the very same field of study!
If I recall, despite the many potentially fruitful areas of study this research unearthed, he was unfortunately forced to curb and drop them them entirely when he and the ponies around him began to experience temporarily feelings of inhabiting the bodies of other beings! I myself dreamt of being an ape-like creature, covered in clothing from head to withers, and living in a castle called Camelot of all things! Even more confusing, there wasn’t a camel to be found anywhere near this castle! However, the local ape King did had some very interesting ideas on both governance and architecture, much of which have influenced my own thoughts on such matters.
But I digress! I’m writing this note to advise you to please exercise the utmost caution in further study of this potentially disruptive phenomenon, fascinating though it may be!
On another topic, have you had time to test the educational game console I had sent to you? If you do perhaps you can explain this confusing concept of “gamification” that all the pedagogues are raving about. Aparently some equine-interface experts expect this to become the norm in building arcanotronic systems. I do admit that all of this manababble has this old mare feeling all of her substantial number of millenia!
With affection,
Your most dedicated tutor,
Princess Celestia
