Embracing Chaos

by Smjames

Rating: everyone
Tags: Spike, Comedy, Cutie Mark Crusaders, Twilight Sparkle, Main 6, Discord, Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Romance
Length: 34926

Twilight Sparkle's is now the headmistress of her very own school and is ready to help mold the young minds of the next generation. But then Discord signs on as a teacher and she finds herself just as much a student as those she's leading.

Twilight Sparkle, Element of Magic and Princess of Friendship, can now add the titles Princess of Learning and Headmistress of the Equestrian Academy of Magic to her name. Her life-long dream of spreading knowledge to everyone is now her actual job description and after going through the grueling setup process she's now ready to be the best educator ever. But then Discord comes along wanting to become one of her professors and everything she had expected to do gets thrown out the window.

This is a story based on the next gen series of drawings done by Lopoddity on Deviantart (Link down below). As you can no doubt guess from the cover art this will be a TwiCord story with many other ships passing through based on Lopy's ideas from her gallery, the focus being on the journey each relationship goes through to get to their end point. And also Discord antics, because those are the best antics.
Lopoddity pony gallery.
Have fun and enjoy the story!

Published 2015-04-01 15:00:01 UTC
Last updated 2020-03-31 22:39:52 UTC

Chapter 2

Embracing Chaos Chapter 2

In one of the many hallways traversing the massive Castle of the Two Sisters Rarity and Applejack trotted along, following the signs on the walls pointing them to the office of their long-unseen friend and soon-to-be Headmistress. Both mares had traveled to the castle together along the newly built pathway leading from Ponyville through the Everfree Forest, a far cry from the harrowing journey they had taken to gather the Elements all those years ago. By appearances they were the first in their circle of friends to make it to the Academy, which was a bit odd given that Fluttershy and Pinkie Pie had left town before them. Neither of them was worried though, as they were too focused on being excited to finally see Twilight again.

“I’m just so worried about her, dear.”

Well, mostly excited.

“What are you on about this time, Rares?” AJ said with a resigned tone. Here we go again.

“Oh come now Applejack, surely you are just as familiar as I am with Twilight’s usual reaction to stress?” Both mares shuddered a bit as they recalled the ‘Want-it Need-it’ incident.

“Kinda hard to forget about that,” Applejack agreed. “But what’s that got to do with anyth’n now?”

Rarity stared at Applejack very seriously, her eyes brokering no argument. “That… spell was Twilight’s reaction to possibly being late on an assignment from Princess Celestia. One that didn’t even have a time limit! How much worse do you think she’s doing now that she’s on the precipice of leading her own school? The sheer amount of stress she must be under… I shudder to think of it.”

AJ sighed, understanding why Rarity was so worried about this. After all, she often put herself in the same situation with her dress-making business, taking on far too many orders at once because she couldn’t say no to a needy client. She’d been getting better lately with Applejack’s pushing her to slow down and relax a bit, but the urge was always there. “I know you’re worried about her, sugar cube. Hay, when I first heard the news, I thought the same thing would happen. But I stopped worrying, and yah wanna know why?”

Rarity nodded, gazed fixed upon the orange mare.

“Because we didn’t hear about it. If Twi really was having a breakdown like that, then Spike would have let us know ages ago.”

Rarity blinked in thought as the two rounded a corner. “I suppose you’re right darling. Spike wouldn’t let poor Twilight suffer alone if that were to occur.” She bit her lip for a moment before saying, “You don’t think he’s still upset at me do you?”

Applejack stopped walking forward so she could smack her hoof against her forehead. “Oh for Luna’s sake, not this again!”

“Well pardon me Applejack but this is a valid concern,” Rarity said with a huff. “Spike had a massive crush on me for the longest time and then I end up falling in love with one of his sister’s best friends! If it were me I’d still be absolutely furious about being shut down after being misled for so long.”

“But Spike ain’t you,” AJ replied reasonably, having had plenty of chances to practice this conversation. “I’ve told you before and I’ll tell you again now. He’s forgiven you. A pony’s heart will follow its own path. He knows that. Yours just happened to go in a different direction then his wanted. It’s not your fault.”

Rarity sighed and nodded, but Applejack could hear her sniffling slightly. “I just didn’t want him to get hurt.”

Before the other mare could react Applejack wrapped around her in near-crushing hug. “I know yah didn’t Rares. You’d never want to hurt anypony, least of all one of your friends. Spike knows that too. That’s why he forgave you.”

Rarity held still for a moment as she let Applejack’s words wash over her before returning the hug just as strongly. “Thank you love. I really needed to hear that.” She pulled out of the hug and gave Applejack a quick peck on the check, causing the farm pony to blush happily. “You always know just what to say.”

Applejack chuckled a bit as the two ponies started walking forward again. “Eh, I just say the same stuff that Granny told me when I was a filly. It usually works.”

Rarity looked at her out of the corner of her eye skeptically. “Your grandmother gave you romantic advice when you were still a child?”

“She gave me and Big Mac all kinds of grown-up advice. It was how she sent us to sleep when would get restless in the summer.”

Rarity laughed and said, “Sounds just like my father. He would go on and on about all the different places he’d been to and only list the most boring parts to get me to stop pestering him about getting more fabric or gems.”

Applejack smiled and laughed as well. “Guess lots of parents end up doing the same thing with their kids no matter where they’re from.” The two fell into a companionable silence for a while as they made their way through the hallway.

They were just about to turn another corner when they heard a shout from behind them and paused to see who it was. All they ended up seeing was a pink blur flying right at them like a meteor. The group rolled and tumbled backwards a dozen feet before they came to a halt with a familiar party planner sitting on top.

“Hi girls! Boy, I am sooo glad we caught up with you. I mean, we left like ten minutes before you but Fluttershy wanted to look all around the path at all the new stuff and I was like ‘Okay!’ and we wandered around for a while but then we got to the castle and we wandered around some more and now we’re here and I’m just so excited to see Twilight! Aren’t you excited?”

Rarity and Applejack stared up at their friend blankly. No matter how many times they heard the pink mare rattle on with her endless run-ons they would never get used to it. “We’re, um, most excited dearest,” Rarity said hesitantly.

“Uh, yeah Pinkie. Real excited,” Applejack agreed. “Can’t wait to see her.”

“Me neither!” Pinkie said with a carefree grin, still standing on top of the two.

The two trapped mares looked at each other and decided to be a bit plainer in their speech. “Pinkie?”

“Yes Applejack?”

“Could you please get off,” AJ asked as politely as circumstance allowed.

Pinkie looked down and realized where she was standing, then giggled and said, “Oh, sorry.” She then hopped off, helping Rarity and Applejack back up on their hooves.

“You never change, do you Pinkie?” AJ said as she straightened out her hat on her head.

“Nope,” Pinkie stated before hopping around in a circle humming to herself.

Rarity only watched her friend’s movement for a moment before turning to peer down the hall. “Pinkie, dear, where is Fluttershy?”

Pinkie paused in her jumping to look back at where she’d come from. “I don’t know. She was right behind me last I looked.”

“I’m right here,” a quiet voice said from above.

All three ponies fairly leaped out of their fur in surprise, Pinkie in particular flying up and coming back down on top of the other two again. While the trio worked to disentangle themselves from their pile a soft laughter could be heard nearby. Eventually Pinkie managed to get her cotton-candy mane separated from Rarity’s curls and Applejack’s ponytail and they all stood to see who had startled them.

Standing a bit apart from the trio was Fluttershy, shyly giggling at her friends’ situation. As usual she wore her green nurse’s frock, her standard attire from her veterinary business. “Sorry if I scared you. I didn’t think you’d be so startled.”

“That’s fine Fluttershy,” Rarity said reassuringly. “I suppose we’re just a bit jumpy right now. But I am curious as to why you were flying. You never fly indoors.”

Fluttershy blushed a bit but smiled proudly. “Normally I don’t, but some of my butterfly friends have told me I should practice my flying so I can get stronger. It’s going pretty well. I actually flew all the way here.” Her smile practically lit up the hall and she squealed gleefully.

“Well Ah’ll be Flutters, that’s one heck of an improvement.” Applejack trotted up and patted the pegasus on her shoulder. “Rainbow Dash would be impressed.”

Whatever resistive strength Fluttershy had built up with her pride faltered under the praise as she hid her eyes behind her hair. “It’s… it’s nothing. Twilight’s probably a better flyer than me still.”

Rarity waved away the distracting statement with her hoof, saying, “That doesn’t matter darling. What matters is your personal growth, which I would say is outstanding.”

Fluttershy almost shrunk down even further into her hair but dredged up enough willpower to look at Rarity directly to say, “Thanks.”

Rarity smiled back at her and said, “Think nothing of it dear. But really girls, enough of these distractions and delays. We’re here to see Twilight after all.”

“Yeah, Twilight! Woohoo!” Pinkie cried before barreling down the hallway, dragging AJ and Fluttershy with her. “Come on Rarity, hurry up!”

Watching with a roll of her eyes Rarity sighed and sprinted after them. By the time she caught up AJ and Fluttershy had freed themselves from Pinkie’s grasp and were moving under their own power, Applejack running with an easy grace and Fluttershy gliding along above them. “Are you sure this is the right way Pinkie?” Fluttershy asked as she glanced at one of the passing direction signs on the wall.

“Sure is,” Pinkie said confidently. “I memorized the map at the entrance.”

“Wait, you memorized that giant map back at the entrance?” AJ asked incredulously. “That thing was taller than Princess Celestia. How the hay do remember that entire thing?”

Pinkie giggled. “I’m just really good with maps silly.”

“But you only looked at it for five seconds,” Fluttershy objected with a whisper.

“Which was two seconds more than I needed,” Pinkie said while continuing to pronk down the hall. “Now come on slow pokes it’s right down here!” With that Pinkie began to put on some speed, becoming a pink blur that left the others completely in the dust.

Rarity stared at the pink contrail the party mare had left behind before asking, “Remind me again dears, Dash is faster than Pinkie correct?”

“Only when Pinkie lets her be,” Applejack said flatly.

Eventually they all caught up to the party planner at the end of the hall, a massive and elegantly carved wooden door standing in their way. AJ could hear her marefriend coo appreciatively at the craftponyship but was herself more interested in the dull thumping noise that she could hear repeatedly coming from inside the room. “Does anypony else hear that?” she asked as they came within Pinkie’s (nominal) earshot.

“What do you think it is?” Fluttershy asked while pressing an ear against the wood door to hear better.

“Only one way to find out,” Pinkie said happily. She cheerfully knocked on the door and received a muted ‘come in’ as a response. As soon as the invitation was given the door slid inward on its own, letting the four friends trot through.

The room they entered was absolutely huge, possibly as big as the throne room in Canterlot Castle. In fact, this place was the throne room for the ancient castle, with long lines of pillars running along the walls and a series of raised steps at the far end. That role had apparently subsumed under its new owner. Long rows of heavily laden bookcases lined the walls while much of the open space was taken up by chemistry labs, complex machinery and reams upon reams of research notes piled upon tables all over the place. The girls all looked around in amazement at everything as they continued further and further into the room. Eventually they approached the place where the Sisters’ thrones had once sat, replaced now with a large and ornate desk. And sitting behind it was their dear friend Twilight Sparke.

Thunk.

Smashing her head against her desk…

“Oh hello everypony,” she said in a strained yet happy voice, a bright red bruise resting in the middle of her forehead. “Nice to see you all.”

Pinkie was the first to speak, saying, “Hey Twilight, whatcha you doing?”

“Testing out a punishment technique,” she said before smacking her head against the desk again. “Preliminary results show an excess of facial nerve stimulation with no real evidence of cognitive damage.” Another smack. “Unfortunately.”

“And why are you testing this technique on yourself dear?” Rarity asked delicately.

A frown marred Twilight’s face as she felt at her bruise. “Because I did something really, really, really stupid.”

“Oh balderdash!” Applejack cried. “What the hay could you have possibly done to merit you trying to bash your own brains out?”

Twilight stared at AJ blankly and said, “I made Discord a teacher.”

The orange mare blinked a few times before saying, “Well, sorry for distracting yah, Twi. Go ahead and get back to it.”

Twilight moved to do exactly that but was stopped by a cloud of blue magic. “Really Applejack,” Rarity admonished while using her horn to keep Twilight from smacking herself again, “there’s no need to be encouraging that kind of behavior. I’m sure Twilight had a good reason for hiring, eh, Discord as an instructor.” Rarity glanced at the purple alicorn uncertainly and asked, “What exactly was your reasoning dear?”

Twilight’s face somehow became even flatter as she said, “He asked and I said yes.”

Rarity was silent for a moment or two as she processed this then smiled as sweetly as she could while saying, “See Applejack? Perfectly reasonable. Now Twilight I’m sure you miss Ponyville after being away for so long and quite a few changes have occurred while you were busy. If you are free perhaps you should join me in visiting the hospital. I’ve heard that they have added an entire wing for the therapy department.”

“Don’t bother,” a male voice from behind them said, prompting everypony to turn and see who had spoken. Standing at the foot of the steps was none other than Twilight’s adopted son/brother/who-even-really-knows-at-this-point Spike, several antiquated-looking scrolls tucked under one arm. His year traveling with Twilight had been good to him, his height having more than doubled so that he stood as tall as even Applejack along with at last growing a pair of wings. His frame was now rather lanky but still very clearly strong, while the spines on his back had grown sharper and more defined.

On the whole he looked far more the part of a youngling dragon, though his ‘been-there-done-that’ smirk kind of ruined the image. “Twilight already tried to get a therapist to diagnose her but he refused. He said that making a single crazy mistake doesn’t make you insane. If it did everypony in Ponyville would be certified bonkers.”

“Spike!” Pinkie yelled excitedly before launching herself at him with her patented tackle-hug. The dragon steadied himself and caught the pink mare with his free arm, using his tail to keep himself upright against the pony projectile’s speed.

“Hey Pinks,” Spike said while looking down at her hugging his chest. “How’ve you been?”

“Great!” Pinkie said as she let go of Spike and started hopping in a circle around him.

“You’ve gotten much bigger Spike,” Fluttershy observed while eyeing the young dragon’s wings with interest. “What was learning to fly like, if you don’t mind me asking?”

Spike grimaced and a blush crept onto his cheeks. “In a word? Crashy. Very, very crashy.”

AJ laughed as she walked down the stairs. “Like brother like sister huh? I’m sure a big, tough dragon like you could handle crashing just fine.” Once she was next to Spike she reached out a hoof, which he matched with a bumped fist.

“The injuries sure,” Spike agreed. “The embarrassment not so much.” He then turned to the last visiting mare, and said plainly, “Hello Rarity.”

The unicorn jumped slightly at hearing her name before nervously stuttering back, “Oh, um, yes. Hello to you as well Spike.” She looked off to the side and rubbed her hoof in circles on the floor.

Spike noticed her nervousness and rolled his eyes. “You’re not still worried about that are you? That was like two years ago. I’ve been over it for ages.”

“THANK YOU!” Applejack cried loudly. “Ah’ve been tell’n her yah don’t care for weeks but she just won’t listen.”

Spike just laughed and said, “It’s Rarity. Freaking out about little stuff is practically her special talent.”

Rarity huffed at the two of them and said, “You are aware that I am standing right here?” Applejack and Spike both had the grace to look guilty for a second while Fluttershy and Pinkie laughed at their expressions. Rarity waited for their giggles to subside before looking intently at Spike and asking, “Are you sure you’re alright dear?”

Spike stared back at her, seeing the deep underlying worry in her tone and said seriously, “Yes, Rarity. I let it go a long time ago.”

Rarity sighed with an obviously deep relief. “Thank you Spike. You have no idea how worried I was about that.”

“Yeah sure,” Spike said casually. “Hey, you guys do remember you came to see Twilight right?”

The purple alicorn took that as her cue to teleport in the center of the group and drag them all to her with her magic into a group hug. “I’m sorry girls,” Twilight said as she let them go after a few minutes. “I was so wrapped up in my worries about Discord that I didn’t greet you all like you deserve.”

“That’s okay Twilight,” Pinkie said. “We know you’re, like, super-duper busy right now with everything. I mean you’ve got teachers and classes and lessons and lunches and cleaning and fixing and students and…”

Twilight magically shut Pinkie’s mouth for a moment to ensure her friend wouldn’t drive them all crazy with words. “I get it Pinkie. Yes, I am very busy, but I am never too busy to enjoy a visit from my friends.” The girls all went in for another hug at the heartwarming words, Spike hanging back and pretending to gag at the display of sweetness.

“We feel the same way darling,” Rarity affirmed, “and we will always be here for you if you need help.”

Twilight could feel her smile stretching across her face at the words. “Thanks girls.”

“You’re quite welcome.” Rarity pulled back with the others to give Twilight some personal space. “Now, perhaps you could be a dear and explain a bit about Discord.”

Twilight sighed, retreating back up to her desk while using her magic to bring out six chairs. “Might as well have a seat everypony. This could take a while.”

Over the next few hours Twilight began to describe to the girls her journeys across Equestria, Spike excusing himself to get some food and drinks. By the time he got back Twilight was well into her rant about the castle’s trap system, with everypony save Pinkie heartily agreeing with them being shut down. Each of the girls made comments at various points, asking questions that Twilight gladly answered and adding in some suggestions she added to her mental list. Eventually Twilight got to her current source of irritation and explained the situation leading to her accepting Discord.

“And you couldn’t find anypony else besides him?” Fluttershy asked.

“Not with this little time left,” Twilight replied, waving a hoof towards the calendar sitting on the wall behind her. “I have too much to do to focus on finding a replacement unless I want to delay the class for weeks, which simply isn’t an option. Too many students have already signed up for it.”

“So you’ll just hafta trust him Twi. Ain’t nothing else for it.”

Rarity nodded at her marefriend and added, “At the very least you should impress upon him how upset you would be if he did something wrong. And what happened to the last supremely powerful being who upset you in such a manner.”

Twilight blushed a bit as she recalled her battle with Tirek and the damage she had caused. “I wouldn’t go that far even if I still had that much magic. Anyway I already warned him to be on his best behavior and made him Pinkie Promise, not that I think that will stop—” Twilight was suddenly cut off by both Pinkie and Fluttershy loudly gasping in shock.

In less time than it took to blink Pinkie was standing in Twilight’s face atop her desk shouting, “HE MADE A PINKIE PROMISE!”

Twilight shrunk back in her chair under Pinkie’s gaze and hesitantly answered, “Yes?”

Pinkie’s eyes narrowed further as she leaned in closer to Twilight. “Has he broken it?” she asked in a deadly serious voice.

“Not as far as I know.”

“Oh okay then.” Like a light switch being flipped Pinkie immediately become her normal, not terrifying-beyond-rational-thought self and hopped off the table with her usual cheer.

“Did he really make a Pinkie Promise Twilight?” Fluttershy asked intently.

“Yeah,” Twilight answered. “Went through all the motions and everything.”

A look of marvel came over Fluttershy’s face. “Oh my. He’s really serious about this then.”

“What makes you say that sugarcube?” AJ asked.

Fluttershy cringed for a moment. “Do you remember your first anniversary? The one where you and Rarity were managing the Summer Sun Celebration?”

Applejack’s eyes narrowed with remembered annoyance while next to her Rarity’s face started twitching at the memory. “Yah mean the one Discord wrecked by messing with everyponys’ coat colors?” Applejack asked. “Ah admit, it was kinda interest’n looking like metal and all, but nopony could focus on the party’n while they were busy running around like a chicken that had lost its nest.”

“He made me green,” Rarity said in an almost dead tone. “The most awful, dead, unattractive shade of green I have ever seen. I have never felt so ugly and unkempt as I did that day.”

Applejack put her hoof over Rarity’s shoulders and pulled her into a comforting hug. “Yah looked fine Rares. The green looked kinda like the leaves on mah apple trees, and to be honest I really liked the shade of red your mane had. Reminded me of the color of the sky in the early mornin’.”

Rarity looked back at her marefriend with a grateful tear leaking out of the corner of her eye. “You really think so love?” At AJ’s nod Rarity burst out into melodramatic sobs and fairly tackled the Earth pony to the ground in a smothering nuzzle, causing the others to glance away awkwardly.

“I thought it was really fun,” Pinkie said with a bright smile. “Me and Dashie switched colors so I was blue and she was pink and my mane was all rainbowy. Dashie didn’t like it as much though.”

Twilight nodded at that. Rainbow had been particularly put out about her color swap, complaining that the Wonderbolts would never let her fly on their next tour if her best trick was turned into a Sonic Pinkboom. “That’s nothing. Did you girls hear about what he did to the Princesses?”

The others shook their heads in answer while Spike had to cover his mouth with his hands to suppress a sudden onset of giggles.

“While nopony was looking he completely switched the Princesses’ looks around so the Luna looked like Celestia and vies versa. Even their voices were switched.” Twilight chuckled. “I have to admit, seeing Celestia say stuff like ‘Wherefore art that prankster?’ was pretty funny. They actually decided to just roll with it and kept up the switch all night without telling anypony except me and Spike.”

“So that’s why Celestia was talking all funny that night,” Pinkie exclaimed. “I was wondering why she wasn’t upset that Luna stole all the cake for herself.” They all laughed for a bit as happier parts of that night came to mind.

“I suppose Discord’s prank that night wasn’t truly that disruptive,” Rarity said after they’ll all calmed down. “Even if he made a mockery of every fashion I’d tried to make for the celebration. But what was the point you were trying to make Fluttershy?”

“Oh, right. Um, before the celebration I asked Discord to not prank you that night so you and Applejack could enjoy your anniversary in peace. I even had him Pinkie Promise not to.”

“Well that was right kind of you there, Fluttershy,” AJ said appreciatively. “Didn’t really work but that ain’t your fault.”

“Thank you,” Fluttershy said with an embarrassed smile. “But I was still really upset with Discord for doing that when I asked him not to. He tried to get around it by saying he wasn’t pranking just you girls, but everypony in town, but I told him he still broke his promise. When he didn’t apologize I told Pinkie Pie about it and she… Um, did something and he apologized right after.”

The girls all turned to the pink party mare while Twilight asked, “What did you do Pinkie?”

Pinkie just calmly sipped some of the tea Spike had brought earlier, her body unnaturally still as she said, “He broke a Pinkie Promise. Nobody breaks a Pinkie Promise.”

Suddenly any curiosity the girls had about Pinkie’s actions disappeared as if they had never been. “Okay,” Twilight said slowly as she tried to force her mind to stop being terrified, “So, Fluttershy, you’re saying that Discord treats Pinkie Promises really seriously now?”

The yellow pegasus nodded resolutely. “Oh yes. Ever since then he’s kept every single one he’s ever made. It’s why I trust him to look after my cottage while I’m working at the clinic every day. He’s actually really responsible when he wants to be.”

Twilight slumped back in her chair in visible relief, some of the stress weighing down on her mind fading away at Fluttershy’s reassurance. Something still nagged at her mind though. “It still doesn’t really make any sense though. Why would Discord want to be a teacher? He’s never shown any interest in educational matters before now. What does he stand to gain from it?”

“Maybe there’s nothing to gain dear,” Rarity supplied. “Maybe he just felt a sudden need to teach. He’s had phases like that before has he not?”

Applejack whinnied mockingly and responded, “The only phases he has are how disruptive he makes his pranking. No, Ah think this is somethin’ else, somethin’ bigger than just him playing on a whim. Just keep a close eye on him Twi. You never know when he might try somethin’.”

“He won’t do that,” Fluttershy argued gently. “I think he’s really serious about this. Discord has been really quiet lately and I’ve seen him watching the night sky sometimes. He seemed to be muttering to himself but I couldn’t tell what he was saying.”

“You think Discord is sad Fluttershy?” Pinkie asked. “Maybe I should throw him a party to cheer him up!” In an instant she had pulled out her party cannon and started stuffing different items in the barrel, including but not limited to a banana, six brightly painted eggs, fancy brass pottery and a live chicken. None of the girls dared to try and question where exactly Pinkie was getting all those things or how she was fitting them into her cannon.

“That’s okay Pinkie,” Fluttershy said. “I don’t think this is something a party will be able to fix. Sorry.”

That just seemed to make Pinkie even more determined, her hooves dipping in and out of her mane as she grabbed item after item in search of the thing she thought would lift Discord’s mood. While Pinkie all but disappeared into her own mane Twilight turned to the other girls and asked, “So you girls don’t think I made a mistake hiring him?”

Fluttershy, Applejack and Rarity looked amongst each other for a moment before Fluttershy nodded with unusual confidence while Applejack just shrugged. “As much as Ah want to say it was, it wouldn’t really be honest to say so. If he really wants to be a teacher then it may be best to just let him. It’s a risk, but some of the best fruit comes from the most untamed ground.”

Rarity shuddered with delight, saying, “Oh I do love when you speak so eloquently dearest.” Applejack blushed but smiled at the compliment. “I must say that I agree with her, Twilight. As much as I personally distrust Discord I would be a horrible hypocrite to deny him the chance of working where and how he wants. Besides, if he is busy teaching here he won’t be such a bother for us in Ponyville.”

Twilight nodded at the two then turned to Fluttershy for the true deciding vote. As Discord’s first and oldest friend Fluttershy often ended up being the main voice for suggestions on how to deal with the chaos entity, as well as the pony they all complained to after whatever latest trick he had pulled. “What do you think Fluttershy?”

The yellow-coated pegasus was silent for a moment as she gathered together the words she wanted to use. “Yes Twilight. I know Discord can be disruptive and annoying, but I really do think he means well for the most part. Ever since Tirek was defeated he’s been trying so hard to find some way to make up for what he did. Twilight, I think your willingness to forgive Discord for his betrayal and sacrifice yourself to save him really changed him. If you just give him this chance I’m sure he won’t disappoint you.”

“Wow,” Twilight said, marveling at Fluttershy’s speech. “You really think so?”

Fluttershy gave one of her trademark gentle smiles and answered, “I do.”

Twilight turned to each of her other friends and saw their confirming nods in agreement. Even Pinkie took a moment out of her searching to add in her certain grin, though the seriousness of the look was a bit suspect given the starburst-patterned towels hanging from both her ears. “Alright girls, I guess you’re right. Maybe Discord will be fine as a teacher after all. So now that that’s settled lets see about getting some proper food. The cafeteria should be serving lunch soon and I could use some outside opinions on the menu.”

The girls all agreed and made their way to the entrance, Pinkie scooping up some of her fallen items and stuffing them back in her mane. The group had barely made it halfway across the room when they all suddenly felt their cutie marks pulsing faintly.

“Whoa nelly,” Applejack said as she craned her neck backwards for a closer look. “Where in the hay did this one come from? Ah ain’t heard of nothing goin’ on round Equestria that’d need all five of us to fix.”

“This doesn’t feel like a friendship problem,” Twilight argued. She lit up her horn to try and amplify the sense coming from her cutie mark. “Actually I think it’s trying to tell us something else.”

Rarity’s face drew tight as she concentrated hard on the sense she was receiving. “It feels like… Rainbow Dash!”

“DASHIE!” Pinkie cried in boundless joy, a veritable prism of confetti exploding out from all around her. “She’s coming here! She’s really coming! Oh I can’t wait to ask her about the Wonderbolts and—“ Pinkie was halted before she could start as her tail started to vibrate violently. “Oooh, twitchy tail. I wonder what’s falling.”

Twilight’s eyes widened in a sudden panic as realization struck her like a lightning bolt. “Spike, window!”

Spike nodded and shouted, “On it!” before zooming in the direction Twilight was pointing. He quickly pulled open the giant windowpane just before a multi-colored blur blasted through the space it had previously occupied. The ground shuddered slightly as the cause of the blur slammed down onto the carpet. Everyone in the room watched as Rainbow Dash casually set her wings against her side, a lazy grin sitting lopsided on her face. “Hey guys, you miss me?”

“RAINBOW DASH!” was the resounding reply as the girls all pony piled their friend. The next several minutes were spent with group hugs, tears of joy and plenty of failed attempts at avoiding sappy feelings. Eventually they all calmed down enough to let Rainbow stand up on her own, the cyan mare taking a moment to shift all her feathers back into place.

“It’s so good to see you Rainbow,” Twilight said. “I know you must be really busy with that Wonderbolt tour. I means so much to me that you made time to come see me before school started.”

Rainbow tittered hesitantly and rubbed her mane with her hoof. “Yeah. Wonderbolts. Really busy.” She shook her head and gained back her bluster as she said, “But never too busy for you girls. No matter what’s going on I’d never leave my friends hanging.” She paused for a moment, a look of uncertainty on her face. “Hey, can I talk to Twi alone for a sec? It’s kinda important.”

“Of course dear,” Rarity answered. “We were just heading off for lunch. Feel free to join us once you’re done conversing.”

“Yeah sure, no problem. We’ll be there in a bit.”

“Don’t take too long Dashie,” Pinkie advised. “We have to catch up on our pranking plans later.”

“You know it Pinkie.” Twilight and Dash waved to their friends as Spike led them out. Once they were gone Dash turned to the purple alicorn next to her and said, “Sooo… School principle huh? How’s it going so far?”

“Just fine Rainbow. Once we turned off the castle’s traps everything settled down rather easily. So what did you want to talk to me about?”

“Oh, heh heh, nothing major,” Rainbow said unsteadily. “Just got a few questions. You’re teaching pegasus magic here right?”

“Certainly,” Twilight replied with a smile. “Everything from the basics to advanced cloud building techniques and flying styles. Why do you ask? Did you want to take a class?”

“No, no!” Rainbow said quickly. “I just… did you have any openings for pegasi classes by any chance? For the teacher positions I mean.”

Twilight tilted her head in thought for a moment as she considered the question. “Not really, but I could possibly split a class or two into more specialized areas. Why, did you have someone in mind for the position?” Rainbow mumbled lowly to herself as she drew a circle in the floor with a hoof. “What was that Rainbow?”

Rainbow groaned and said out loud, “I said ‘could I be a teacher?’”

“You?” Twilight asked with visible surprise. “But what about the Wonderbolts tour? I thought it was going to go all the way until fall.”

“It is,” Rainbow answered. “But I’m… I’m not going to be a part of it.”

“But why not?” Twilight gasped as she started examining Rainbow all over her body. “Did you get injured? I don’t see any marks or bandages.”

Rainbow shook off her friend and said in frustration, “I’m fine Twi. I’m not hurt.”

“Well than what is it?” Twilight asked insistently. “What’s stopping you from flying in the tour?”

“I…” Rainbow’s voice failed as her eyes started to tear up.

“Rainbow whatever it is you know you can tell me. I won’t ever think any less of you for whatever it is.”

Dash could feel several streaks of water running down her cheeks before she rubbed them away. “Thanks Twi. I needed to hear that.” She took a deep breath to center herself. “Okay, here goes. The reason why I’m not flying in the tour is because I… I quit the Wonderbolts.”

Twilight stared sightless at her friend for several seconds before her brain caught up with her ears and she shouted in the Royal Canterlot Voice, “Wait WHAT?!”

Unbeknownst to either pony a tiny fly shifted back and forth in its place on one of the walls. Oooooh, Discord thought to himself in the confines of his bizarre mind, I so very love plot twists. I just wish I could eat popcorn this small. Wait a minute, I can! And so the fly continued to sit and observe the two mares from far above them, sloppily eating out of a minuscule popcorn bag and enjoying the show.

Author's Note

Guys... I am so sorry it took me so long to get this out. Like, I really just feel awful about this, leaving you guys thinking I was just going to let this thing languish at just one chapter forever. I could try to explain it away with any number of excuses, like I had other stories to focus on (mostly true), limited access to a computer (slightly true), and the fact that I just suck (so true it hurts). I'm pretty sure it's mostly the last one though. Mea Culpa. Anyway, here is the long overdue second chapter to this story with the third (hopefully) not too far away.

Chapter 4

Twilight tried to hide her bright smile as she settled into her seat at the back of the class, placing her notebook carefully on the desk with her quill sitting perfectly parallel to it. Her normally straight mane was pulled up in a short ponytail (she had no idea why it was called that given most pony’s tails were very distinct from each other) and changed to a uniformly bright crimson. Her coat had been given a similar treatment, sporting a new dull orange tone rather than its usual violet. Her wings were hidden by a special spell, and even her starburst cutie mark was altered, now being a simple four pointed star shining with the same pale yellow as the sun.

‘Sunlight Twinkle’ pulled out a mirror from her bag and gave her disguise one last check before the other students started to arrive. Twilight had created this persona shortly after starting her Equestria wide search to help her avoid undue attention during her travels. Ponies were much less likely to get into a tizzy about a princess visiting their city if they never knew one was there to begin with. Plus it was always amusing to see her interviewee’s freaking out at seeing the unassuming and ordinary Miss Twinkle replaced with the oh-so-legendary Princess Sparkle. She never got tired of seeing that flabbergasted look they all got when the truth was revealed.

And now Twilight was using the disguise to get a view of what each class was like without the teachers feeling the pressure of their headmaster looking over their shoulder. So far the results had been excellent. As stressful as Twilight’s countrywide search had been it seemed that it had been well worth the effort as each teacher she’d visited had had a great first day. The worst that she had seen was a little bit of awkwardness from Professor Wild Beard due to his incredibly thick accent, but that was really it. But this class here would be the deal breaker; the one that Twilight was most worried about.

Discord’s first class as Professor Chaos Theory.

There were so many ways Twilight could imagine this class going wrong, each one more ridiculous and insane than the last. In spite of everything Discord and her friends had said about him wanting to turn over a new leaf she was still worried about it. What if it was all just a trick? What if he had a sudden urge to pull a prank? What if he sneezed and transformed a student on accident? What if…

Twilight smacked her head with a hoof to get her mind back on track. It’ll be fine, she told herself as she watched the first few students trailing in. Discord knows better than to test me on this. Twilight waved to a griffon who said hello to her. And if he doesn’t then he will learn.

She spent the rest of the free period watching the other students filing in and trying to avoid thoughts of the trickster chimera they were here to learn from. As expected most of the students were unicorn ponies, but a surprisingly large number of students were of other races, pony and non-pony. Twilight even spotted a juvenile drake wandering in just seconds before the bell sounded and everyone raced into their seats.

The door swung open into the wall with a loud bang as Disco… Professor Theory strutted into the classroom. “Hello everyone,” he said in his usual deep baritone, “and welcome to Theory of Magic, the class where you will learn the basic foundations of magic and how to turn them completely on their head.”

Wonderful start, Twilight snarked as she dutifully lifted her pen in her (red color disguised) magic.

Discord’s own magic lit up on his pony form’s horn as he twirled a piece of chalk against the board to spell out his doppelganger’s name. Each letter was written in a completely different font and size than the others, making for a disorienting read. “My name, as you can no doubt see, is Professor Chaos Theory. You may call Professor, Mr. Theory, Sir Chaos, CT (which doesn’t stand for Connecticut by the way), or just ‘Hey you!’ if you feel like it. I’m open to anything.”

Several of the students giggled while the others just sat there and stared blankly at their teacher in confusion.

Discord-as-Theory huffed at the lukewarm reaction. “Really, people, there’s no need to be so stiff. This class is more than just boring notes and lectures. It’s a class of magic for Luna’s sake. Lighten up, crack a joke. Just open yourself up and have some fun for once.”

What’s wrong with notes and lectures?, Twilight thought as she pursed her lips. They can be fun too.

Most of her classmates didn’t seem to agree with her as they chattered excitedly at the prospect Discord was proposing to them.

One unicorn pony with a bright yellow coat and a joke book cutie mark asked, “Mr. Theory, would you say that this class will be a magical experience?”

A loud chorus of boos and jeers came from the rest of the class even as most of them had to work to stifle their own grins.

For his part Discord was busy laughing his tail off and clapping his front hooves. “Oh yes, ha ha. That’s what I wanted to hear. A bit on the snout there, young colt, but definitely in the spirit of things. Look to your peer, my students. That is that attitude I expect to see in this class.”

Twilight was about to make a negative mark in her notes about lowering something as important as school to a simple joke when she realized that the mood in the room had changed. Where before the students were all stiff and hesitant now they were leaning forward in their seats and smiling. Twilight placed her hoof under her chin as she contemplated this. Was it really a bad thing to have the class treat the class as a joke if it kept the class attentive and interested? Not really, she supposed, adding a positive mark to her notes as she refocused on Discord, who was busy criticizing the unicorn’s bevy of puns and giving him advice on improving them.

“And remember, the cringier the better. Really make them squirm as they make the connection. But I’m getting sidetracked, so let’s get started with the lesson.”

Theory turned away from the students and grabbed up the chalk again, this time drawing a cross up on the board, each point marked by a different color. “Now some of you may be asking yourselves, ‘What is magic?’ Of course, if you are asking that question then I really have to wonder what rock you’ve been hiding under your whole life.” A chorus of laughs rang around the room. “But seriously, most of us are no doubt aware of just how important magic is in our daily lives. It is what lets Pegasi control the weather, Earth ponies grow their crops so quickly and with such health, and what allows unicorns to reshape the world around them to fit their needs. But few people truly stop to think about what magic really is, how it works and why it is that we creatures can use it. That, my fine students, is what I shall be teaching in this class.”

“Now, most of you are probably unaware of this, but there are actually four different types of magic that exist here in Equestria. Yes, you heard me correctly. Four distinct types, and I don’t just mean between species. There is a reason this is a little known fact. As it happens, the vast majority of magic that occurs throughout the lands belongs to a single branch which is used by nearly every creature ever known.”

Twilight ignored the startled murmurs of the students as she pondered Discord’s words. Four branches? But Princess Celestia only taught me about two, light and dark magic. What other types are there?

A blue piece of chalk floated up to the left point of the cross on the blackboard, sketching out a puffy cloud with the word Control centered within. “This common branch is often referred to as the light branch, given that most of its uses are for practical and benevolent purposes, but this is a misconception of the truth. If fact, many light magic spells can end up being used to negative effect with just a little creativity from the practitioner. Even something as simple as levitation can be used to harm others if its user so desires. The real name for this branch would better be termed as control, for this is the branch that is meant to create order from a chaotic world.”

Professor Theory lit up his horn and cast a spell to produce a small light source in the center of the classroom. “Any unicorn will tell you that the key to casting a spell is to concentrate tightly on the effect you desire and push your magic to complete that task. A strong will and iron focus is just as important to spell casting as raw magical power.”

Theory’s horn flashed again and summoned a small potted plant. “The same effects are shown from the magic of other tribes and races, each using their innate magic to enact different effects meant to give them an advantage in life. While it is true that a unicorn may copy many of the traits that other races have, they will never be as strong as a native user and will suffer a penalty to their own magic as long as they maintain the spell. This is why cooperation of the races is preferred over any one assuming dominance. If fact, were someone like a griffon given a focus to channel their magic and training in how to use it, they too could mimic the abilities of unicorns, though obviously to a lesser degree.”

The scraping of pencils and quills over paper washed over Twilight’s ears as she had trouble deciding which was more surprising; that Discord of all creatures would be able to give a coherent lecture like this, or that she herself was having trouble paying attention to anything else.

“Mr. Theory sir?” one griffon asked with a raised paw. “If non-ponies are capable of using magic just like unicorns, why haven’t I ever seen one do it before? I know plenty of grifs back home who would love to have that kind of power.”

“A fine question, my feathered friend, and one I have an unfortunate answer to. Focuses, you see, are very rare to find in nature, growing in secluded locales far from civilization and hence very expensive to procure. And beyond that, even if one were to go to the expense of retrieving a focus it would still have to be refined by a trained arcane smith, as well as the training needed to learn how to use one properly. Suffice it to say, most simply do not consider it worth the time and effort to acquire a focus, not when hiring a unicorn to do the job is so much cheaper.”

The griffon’s face fell at the answer, and Twilight felt a little sympathy for him.

“Yes, it is a bit disheartening isn’t it, but fret not. There are plenty of uses for your own personal magic that no unicorn, or indeed any other race could truly match. We all have our own ways of asserting control over the world around us, and that is the basis for this most common branch of magic. But it is not the only one. Oh no, far from it. Control way be the most common, but it is far from the most powerful.”

A piece of chalk scratched on the board again, this time forming a dark red crystal shape around the right point on the cross around the word Emotion. Theory’s voice dropped into a much more ominous tone as he said, “The second branch of magic is one which has a very bad name surrounding it, but sadly it has done plenty to earn its title. It is a branch that is accessible to any race, but has very few practitioners. Dark magic. The magic of emotion.”

Several students gasped at the name, others blanched and shrunk back in their desks, and Twilight herself stared down at Discord in shock. He can’t be serious. Surely he’s not thinking of teaching them that!

“Yes, dark magic. That foreboding specter which overshadows many of history’s darkest names. But just as light magic is not all good, so too does dark magic have its own positive traits.”

In the center of the red outline Theory spelled out the word emotion in orange. “Have you ever had a moment where you were extremely angry, or sad, or even joyful? Ever had a time when you let your feelings run free and guide your actions without thinking of what you were doing? That, in a nutshell, is the core of what emotion magic is. It is an outpouring of energy that comes from lowering our barriers, freeing those inner emotions and acting as they will us to, rather than from controlled thought. This is why the dark and light magics are so opposed, why they cancel each other out and come into such conflict.”

“But what does dark magic actually do?” a green unicorn asked.

“That is the question isn’t it? For all the fear that surrounds its use, few people actually know how emotion magic works. And that is for a very simple reason. In practice, it is nearly indistinguishable from light magic.” Theory’s horn lit up once again, but instead of his previous ocean-blue shade, now its took on a darker, more aggressive bluish-black color.

“Emotion magic is used in the same ways and for the same purposes as control magic, but the mechanism and power source is the difference. Where control magic is done by focusing on a task and willing it to happen, emotion magic has your feelings desire something done and force reality to make it so. As such spells or abilities powered by emotion are less restrained and controlled, but are also vastly more powerful. A telekinesis spell directed by emotion may wield more energy in a second than the same unicorn could over the course of an hour, but without the surge of feeling to propel it, the spell is much more likely to collapse.”

A pegasus raised her wing to call attention to herself. “Professor, is that why minotaurs get stronger when they get angry?”

“Yes, exactly that. But anger isn’t the only emotion that may cause it. A sense of competition can push someone to go beyond their normal limits, being depressed may change the surrounding environment to suit the mood, and love can create reactions that would never be predicted otherwise. Any sufficiently strong emotion can draw this magic out of you. With it you could accomplish great and astounding deeds beyond the normal bounds of magic.” Theory flourished his dark field about, creating a dazzling light show across the room.

Twilight narrowed her eyes and was about to interrupt the lesson when Discord continued. “However, there is indeed a reason this form of magic is considered dark. While it is true that emotion magic is very powerful, it is highly addictive. Should one deliberately use this form for extended periods, it will begin to consume them. Their thoughts will be bent towards this primary emotion, directing them away from normal reactions into acting with only this one feeling. Eventually, they will be consumed by the magic and dwindle into little more than an outlet for power, a focus of this one emotion that is driven to spread it everywhere, no matter what others may want.”

Theory’s magic suddenly cut off, the light returning to normal as the students stared grimly at their teacher. “I will not be covering the use of emotion magic in this class, given the extreme dangers associated with it. It will be up to you if you wish to pursue this topic further, but be warned. The power of emotion can be intoxicating. Know your limits, and make sure others are aware of your study as well. Nobody wants another King Sombra.”

The class gave their various affirmations to the warning, while Twilight sat back and pondered. He’s suggesting they avoid it, while also explaining what it is and how it works. I’m impressed. This is easily one of the best handlings of this subject I’ve ever seen. Aside from Celestia of course. I got a really good lesson on that stuff after I got back from defeating Sombra.

So those are the two I’ve heard of, Twilight thought as she highlighted another section of her notes. But then what are the other two types of magic?

“You may be wondering for yourself, ‘But then what are the other two types of magic?’,” (Twilight resisted the urge to scoff), “and you would be right to do so. If dark magic is to be considered rare, than these two types in their purest state are nearly nonexistent. And yet the first still appears in everyday life with far more regularity than you would expect.”

A third word, Perception, was drawn at the bottom of the cross, the ghostly white letters highlighted by dark grey shadows. “The third form of magic is one that has only one known user, with a name that is probably even more infamous then that of Sombra.”

Twilight narrowed her gaze closely upon the disguised chimera. If he were going to reveal himself to the class at any point, I’d bet my flank now would be it.

Theory’s horn shone brightly for several seconds before a flash and a bang enveloped the room. Even prepared for something unexpected Twilight was caught off guard like the rest of the class, forced to wipe her eyes to clear out the spots. Once her vision had returned Twilight cast her glare down upon the front of the class and spotted him immediately.

Discord!

As a lamp.

Held up by Mr. Theory’s magic…

…

Oh you cheeky little drake.

While Twilight sat there fuming the rest of the class was in a minor uproar as they two recognized just who Theory’s lamp was modeled after.

“Indeed my students. Perception magic is none other than Chaos, the delightfully strange and entirely unpredictable force that is the field of Discord’s power. Under the influence of chaos magic, the impossible becomes the likely, certainty is bodily thrown out the window, and reality decides to go ahead and take a lunch break.”

Theory set the lamp upon the desk while sporting a gigantic grin. “I’m sure many of you are in some way familiar with the so called ‘Spirit of Disharmony’s exploits in one way or another from his various trapezes across the country. My personal favorite would probably have to be the tale of Potatoville, land of infinite fries and chips.”

The Princess of Friendship and Education gained a very un-princess-like twitch in one eye as she recalled that particular adventure. Spuds. Spuds everywhere! More salt than anypony could stand. And the puns… Oh merciful Celestia in Canterlot, the puns!

Professor Theory gave a quick glance up at the back of the glass and briefly flashed a self-satisfied smirk but quickly sent it away as he spoke again. “Yes, Discord’s influence in the field of perception magic truly cannot be overstated, but there are many more moderate forms of this branch that are accessible to everyone.”

“Perception magic, you see, is not something that can be easily observed in the normal way of most spells. In fact, there are no true spells or invocations for this form of magic at all. It comes at the spur of the moment, here and gone in but the blink of an eye. For the magic of perception is always in the eye of the beholder.”

“How perception magic works is a bit difficult to explain, but to put it shortly it comes into play when the user has reality ignore them for a moment in order to do what they want done. Normally impossible acts will temporarily achievable, and I don’t just mean difficult to accomplish tasks. No, I speak of things that should be physically impossible to do happening with no explanation of their occurrence. In laypony terms it could simply be described as, ‘Magic did it.’”

Twilight’s notes were left lonely and untouched on her desk as she stared at Discord with a scrunched up face. What in Equestria is he babbling about? I’ve never heard of any kind of magic that does something like that. Altering reality, sure, but completely suspending it in its entirety? It’s absurd. Heck, that sounds like something Pinkie Pie would make…

The alicorn’s eyes widened to their limits as 2 connected with 2 as 4 in her head. No… It… it can’t be. That can’t… There’s no way. Yet the more Twilight attempted to deny it, the more sense it made. The random appearances from out of nowhere, the impossible body contortions, and of course that infamous Pinkie Sense. All of it suddenly fell under a new light of understanding. Pinkie can use Chaos magic. It all makes sense now. Twilight’s brow furrowed as she continued that line of thought. But how can she use it so much? How does it work?

“I can see the obvious question in your minds already,” Theory said as he looked at the eager faces of his class. “How does it work, and how can I use it for myself? The disappointing answer to that is that you can’t use it. Not intentionally anyway. Perception magic is a fickle thing, appearing only when it wishes, as according to rules beyond our determination. For every desire and action we make a judgment is made. Would breaking the usual bounds of reality be funny? Are the results of an act so potentially amazing and awe inspiring that the possibilities of failure need to be erased? Is it more dramatic for two ponies to have a quiet heart to heart moment, or for an unforeseen twist to throw off the expected outcome? If what will happen is sufficiently compliant with these mysterious rules then the act will go forward, laws of physics be darned.”

“But who makes the choice?” the lone dragon at the front asked.

“Who indeed?” Theory replied. “There is no real way of knowing just who the magic of perception entrusts with its implementation. It could be your neighbor, that kid you once owed money to in grade school, an ethereal entity watching over our planet, mysterious creatures in another dimension observing us with magical projectors of sight and sound, or perhaps even the universe itself! On this point, students, your guess it just as good as mine.”

“How come Discord’s magic is so powerful then?” the pun-making pony from before said. “Why is his magic different from the rest of it?”

“Discord is a very interesting and unique case in this regard, and a close subject of study for me ever since his return. From what I have been able to piece together in my observations, where all others who use perception magic can never knowingly invoke this power and are subject to the whims of the unknown decider, Discord serves as his own judge in his acts and thus may use his magic at any time.”

So that’s why Discord is so strong, Twilight marveled. He can literally do whatever he wants, regardless of anything else.

“However, there is a catch to all of this.”

Twilight’s brow raised several inches. A catch?

“While Discord is, through his unique power set, able to use chaos as often and as much as he wishes, reality does not enjoy being messed with too much. Should he, or indeed any user of perception magic, attempt to go too far too fast with their rule breaking, then reality will snap back into place quickly and violently. Discord may have seemingly unlimited power, but there are bounds even he cannot overstep.”

The class fell silent, many of them pondering Theory’s words with worried looks. The quiet was broken though when a voice from the top row asked, “And what are those bounds?”

All gazed in surprise at the speaker, but none were more surprised than the speaker herself. Why did I ask that? Twilight thought with a sharp reprimand. I’m not supposed to draw attention to myself!

Theory looked up at her, his yellow eyes locking directly onto hers. To Twilight’s surprise, the gaze was not filled with satisfaction or glee as she would have expected at being found out. Rather, the look seemed dull and empty to her mind. Almost sad in a way.

“There are several immutable laws of reality out there, Miss Twinkle,” he said finally. “But none more important than this: Thou shalt not attempt to cheat death.”

A hushed gasp flew through the room.

“Ask me not how I know this wisdom, for it is a tale too dark and depressing for me to convey here. Just know that bitter experience is my informant on this matter, and leave it at that.”

Theory’s grim demeanor disappeared in an instant and was replaced by his usual grin. “But come now, this class isn’t all supposed to be about doom and gloom. In fact, you could call this last branch the exact opposite of that.”

A series of chalk pieces swiped back and forth at the top of the cross until a rainbow encircling the word Harmony was visible. “I’m not sure if any of you noticed this, but each branch we’ve spoken of is rarer and more powerful than the one before it. Control is used by nearly everyone and is the standard of strength, while emotion is less common but vastly stronger when used. Chaos is even less common than emotion magic and is figuratively much stronger in what can be accomplished with it, even if emotion has more brute strength. But no magic is as rare or as strong as this last one. Harmony magic, the magic of Balance.”

Theory’s magic aura lit up once again, different parts of the cloud forming different colors that shifted about as churned by the wind. “Harmony magic is in some ways an amalgamation of the other branches, incorporating many elements of each into a stronger and more cohesive whole. Through this magic are balanced the positive nature of control magic, the raw power of emotion, and the ability to manipulate reality from chaos. The result is a force that can match and exceed the collective power of every being Equestria if need be.”

“You’re talking about the Elements of Harmony and that stuff right?” A teal earth pony said.

“Correct. The Tree of Harmony, the Elements it created, the Crystal Heart, and the mysterious Rainbow Power are the only known sources of Harmony magic, each with far more magical energy then anything else you might ever encounter. But the exact method of how Harmony works is unknown, even to the most knowledgeable theorists, so all I can really do is tell you that they exist. Beyond that, next to nothing is known about them. Headmistress Twilight probably knows the most of anyone currently alive, so if you wish to know more you might as well ask her.”

Twilight blinked in surprise at the mention of her name. Huh, I guess he’s right. I’m the only one who’s done any actual research on the Rainbow Power, but I still have no idea how it works. I’m not sure anypony does.

“Sadly, because of its rarity and mysterious workings, I will be unable to teach you very much at all about Harmony magic. Indeed, while it is important that you are all at the very least aware of the other branches, it is unlikely they will be of any practical use to you in your daily lives. Instead, this course will focus on teaching you the in’s and out’s of control magic, all the little tricks and loopholes that will let you use it to the fullest.”

A harsh ringing sounded around the classroom, jolting everyone in their seats. “It appears that is all we have time for today, students,” Theory said while cleaning his desk of the miscellaneous items it had gathered. “Next time we will begin with a review of basic magical principles which we will build upon for the first half of the semester. If you feel the need to have some sort of homework on the first day, then just spend sometime thinking about when you might have used certain magics and why you used them. Ta ta everyone, and have a happy day.”

The students all filed out one at a time, many chatting with their fellows about the new knowledge they’d been granted and excitement for the year to come. Twilight held back, pretending to have spilled her bag to give her an excuse for delay. Once the class was empty of all but her and Discord she activated her horn and passed its aura around herself, changing her colors back to normal and letting her wings reappear.

“Oh my goodness!” Theory falsely exclaimed. “One of my students has transformed into an alicorn princess! Could they be a changling? A traveler from out of time? An overly curious headmistress!” The last was spoken with almost hysterical screeches as Theory keeled over his desk with a hoof over his eyes.

With a smiling roll of her eyes Twilight fluttered over the desks to the main floor. “Well first off, I’m pretty sure I’m not a changeling, since I was the one who invented the spell that reveals them. Secondly, my time traveling adventures were entirely not my fault. I was dragged into them by Starlight. And last but not least, there is no such thing as overly curious, just curious without caution.” The figurine lamp hovered off of the desk and was waved in front of Theory’s face. “And with you being the one teaching this class, I had plenty of reason for caution.”

Theory grabbed the lamp from Twilight’s grasp and poofed it away with a clop of his hoof. “Caution hmm? Not suspicion this time?”

“Not suspicion,” Twilight confirmed. “As much as you love to cause mischief wherever you go, I knew you were aware of my stance on the matter and wouldn’t deliberately do anything to upset me. It was the accidental chaos that I was more concerned with.”

Theory’s smirk grew wide with mischievous intent. “Well how did I do then, Headmistress? Did I pass your test? Complete you exam? Swing well your judgment upon me?” His face pressed up closer to hers with every sentence, until by the last he was practically nuzzling her.

Twilight felt an urge to retreat but fought against it. For too long she had let Discord discomfort her with his disregard for personal space, and she was fed up with it. If he wanted to play that game, then by Celestia she was going to beat him at it. A quick glance at Theory showed that he seemed pleased by her resilience this time, rather than upset at the lack of reaction. He did not make any move to pull back though.

Doing her best to ignore the fact that Discord was almost leaning against her Twilight said, “You did… good. Surprisingly good, in fact. If I didn’t know any better I’d almost say you had done this sort of thing before.” She raised an eyebrow and looked sidelong at him. “Have you done this before?”

“Maybe. Maybe not.” Theory’s grin did not fade a wit as he allowed himself to step away from his (technical) superior. “Perhaps I have dabbled in the educative arts in the past, or I am simply so skilled and talented that the act comes naturally to me. There’s really no way to know is there?”

“With you, probably not. Still, I must say I was impressed. You described the material, what it is, how it works, etc., in a clear yet evocative manner that kept the students’ attentions without confusing them. Even I learned a few things from your lesson plan, and I’m one of the most well educated ponies in Equestria.”

“There is always more to learn, Twilight,” Theory stated in a surprisingly serious tone. “Even when you think you have seen it all, the world will still sometimes surprise you.”

Twilight nodded. “I’ve learned that lesson plenty of times by now, once for almost every adventure I’ve had. But I have to say that what surprised me most was how philosophical you got at several points in the lecture. I didn’t think you had the self-control to think that deeply.”

Theory scoffed loudly at the assertion. “I’ll have you know that I am perfectly capable of deep internal pondering, Headmistress. Why, I do so multiple times every day in my thinking tree. Ask questions about the nature of existence, the meaning of relationships between people, the value of an eternal life. Many such things wander about this noggin of mine.”

“In-between bouts of random chaotic jubilation and pranking?” Twilight asked with a knowing look.

“Quite so,” he answered without the slightest hint of remorse. “There must be balance even in madness after all.”

“I’ll take your word on that one. Anyway, travel period is almost up, so I’ll let you get ready for your next class. Keep up the good work Discord, and remember to keep your true identity hidden. For now at least.” She started trotting towards the exit but paused as her mind cast back to a certain part of the lecture. “Discord?”

Theory looked up from his desk and gazed at her. “Yes Twilight?”

The alicorn hesitated for a moment, trying to find the right words. “You know that you can come and talk to me anytime right? If you’re having trouble with something.”

Theory chuckled. “I doubt that I’ll have any trouble with the classes, but thank you for the concern.”

Twilight shook her head. “That’s not what I meant. I mean if you have something that’s bothering you, an event in your past that is… You can come talk to me if you need to. I’ll listen to anything you need to say.”

“I…” Discord trailed off as he seemed to realize what Twilight was talking about. “I… appreciate the offer, Twilight, but this is something personal to me that I want to deal with myself. I doubt you would be able to help me on this matter.”

Twilight searched Discord’s eyes to measure the truth of his words, then sighed. “Alright. If you’re sure you don’t need help, that’s fine. Just know that I’ll be there if you change your mind. Not as your employer or as a princess. But as your friend.”

Discord’s eyes grew wide for an instant before he settled down into a gentle smile. “Thank you, Twilight. That… that means a lot to me.”

“You're welcome Discord. Have a nice day of teaching.” She gave him one last smile before turning to the door and trotting out, quietly shutting the room closed behind her.

Discord stared at the door in silence for a time before turning back to his desk and preparing the materials for his next class, his pleased grin never leaving his face.

Author's Note

HAPPY NEW YEARS EVERY PONY, HUMAN, DRAGON, AND OTHER AMALGAMATION OF BEING! And may I just say, I am SOOOOO sorry for taking so long in getting this chapter out. It's been some very busy months for me this fall and first half of winter. I've had to juggle work at pizza hut, my creative writing school work, helping out my family wherever possible ~~and my own laziness~~ the random strikes of offensive life that would sometimes appear. To be fair though, while the original idea of this chapter was in mind almost from end of the last one, the actual execution required quite a bit of thought. Translating general head canon thoughts into something that is understandable for others in a written format is more difficult than I had expected, especially if it was going to be done in a teaching format (hints of what teaching might be like for me in the future. Notes taken).
Most of the mental time I allotted to this story was taken up by deeply analyzing the magic system of Equestria (such as it is) and figuring out what rules it could have that would keep with what was presented in the show. And that is the result you see here on the page now, relaid through Discord-as-Chaos-Theory as if you were one of his students. But now that this ~~hill's been climbed~~ chapter is done, we can finally move on to the more romance related stuff this story is (ostensibly) about. Til next time and 2016, see you all soon.

Chapter 5

Embracing Chaos Chapter 5

There was a light mummering of chatter coming from around the room as everyone sat waiting for the meeting to start. At first glance they seemed to be a rather eclectic group, made up of ponies of all tribes, some griffons, a minotaur, a couple zebras, and even a yak, but underneath surface appearances they all carried a similar focus; passing on their knowledge to others, to which they had to thank the mare they were waiting for.

Suddenly the doors to the room burst open and a purple blur rushed through them, trailed of flailing papers being flung out in the blur’s path. Soon enough the blur resolved into the form of Headmistress Twilight, a few strands of her mane out of place but otherwise happy looking. “Hello everyone! Sorry for being a bit late, had a few outside issues to deal with before I could get back to work here. I know you all hate being distracted and unable to focus as much as I do.”

Multiple affirmations came from around the room as the Headmistress spread out her notes for the meeting in front of her, taking a moment to hold and release a calming breath. “Okay, is everyone here? Great! Let’s get started then. First off, I want to congratulate you all on an excellent first week of school. Despite a few hiccups here and there we seem to be off to a great start, and I can’t wait to see how much better we all become as time goes on.”

She paused to let the teachers have their moment of saying thanks or trying to wave off the praise. Out of the corner of her eye she could see Chaos Theory smugly wiping a hoof on his jacket, but she elected to ignore him for time being. Not that he was likely to make that easy.

“Secondly, I wanted to get all of your thoughts on how things are progressing so far, as well as any ideas you might have to make your jobs easier and so on. The floor is open, no need to raise your hooves or other appendages to get called on.”
Several small laughs came from around the room before a giant of a yak stood up. Twilight noted that his hair was slightly less tangled and messy than usual, though his beard was as mussed as ever. “Yes Professor Wildbeard?”

“Ah was jus wondern’, Miss Headmistress, would it be ahrigh’ to take some of the kids out intah that forest to see some ah the animals? Best way tah learn is practical as Ah always say.”

Twilight blinked, mentally translating the yak’s thick Scoltish accent. “You mean out into the Everfree? Well… I know the forest has calmed down a lot over the last few years, but some of those creatures are still very dangerous and don’t take well the presence of others.”

The yak laughed, a deep, booming belly-shaking sound that reverberated in the table, the chairs, the very walls it seemed. “Ah ain’t worried much ‘boot that Miss Headmistress. Ah been wranglen’ with these kind ah beasties fah longah than most of them younguns been alive. If anything can keep ‘em safe out there, it’s me.”

Twilight took another look at the 10 hoof tall mountain of meat, muscle and fur that was Wildbeard and stared at his equally wild, confident eyes… and almost believed him.

“I’ll… take the idea into consideration for now. Maybe if we can rustle up some extra Guard platoons to go with you on any… ‘field trips’ then we can work something out.”

The yak smiled broadly and settled back down in his seat with surprising gentleness.

“Okay, then,” Twilight said as she gazed around the rest of the table. “Anyone else?”

A stone gray earth pony stood and coughed flatly. “We could use some more rune stones. We don’t have enough.”
Twilight quirked her head at her frie… friend of a friend and asked, “Couldn’t you just get some from your family’s rock farm, Maud?”

Maud shook her head slowly and minimally. “No. Mom and Dad don’t do hoof outs, not even to family. If you want some, you have to buy them, and you control the budget Headmistress.”

Okay… Twilight thought as she processed this new information. I guess I shouldn’t be surprised the Pie family would be so steady on that front. They are very traditional after all.

“Alright then Maud, I’ll see about contacting your parent’s to set up a contract for the school. Also, you can just call me Twilight you know, no need to call me Headmistress every time.” She looked around the room and announced, “Same goes with all of you as well. We’re all friends and colleagues here, no need to be quite that formal.”

The room spoke their agreements and assurances, while Maud blinked in her typical glacial fashion. “I should warn you, our rocks are very expensive. High quality demands high price.”

“I’ll keep that in mind,” Twilight said, even as she mentally wondered, How expensive could some special rocks be anyway? Surely they can’t be that pricey right?

Chaos Theory suddenly started laughing, plodding his hoof on the table as he tried and failed to cover his guffaws. Twilight looked at him in confusion and suspicion. Why do I feel like he knows something I don’t? Wait, what am I saying? It’s Discord. Of course he knows something I don’t. He always does.

“Something you wanna share with us Mr. Theory?” A brown coated pegasus asked.

Theory finished his chuckles and waved away the question, saying, “Nothing of import at the moment my good stallion. Just enjoying a bit of future schadenfreude.”

The pegasus blinked confusedly, and he wasn’t the only one. “A bit of what?”

“But never mind that, let’s move on with our other concerns shall we? For example, what month does the hoofball season start pray tell?”

Twilight froze as she tried to keep her face as a blank mask. Oooooh Discord I am SO going to get you back for this later…

Several of the teachers murmured to each other excitedly at the mention of the sport, and the brown pegasus in particular perked up. “Actually, he has a point there. We haven’t heard anything on who’s doing what in the sports department so far. What’s the word on that, Sparkle?”

Twilight smiled, a weak, fragile expression that she forced herself to maintain rather than let her eye twitch as she knew it desperately wanted to. “Aaaah yes… The sports department. It’s, uh… It’s… in progress.” Her gaze darted about the room, trying to find something to distract them all from the current topic, and instead her eyes fell on Theory, who was sitting there with the most smugly satisfied but encouraging grin she’d had the misfortune to see. To say that his expression did little to help her mood would be like saying Nightmare Moon had been a bit bossy.

Payment in FULL, Discord. In. Full.

The pegasus smiled hopefully - darn his focus on this! - and asked, “So… if it’s in progress, then does that mean that there’s any openings for the coach posi-”

His words, and everyone’s breath, was cut off by the main door exploding open to unleash a miniature sonic boom right over their heads. Everything not tied or nailed down went flying about, including some of the lighter professors, as a cascading prism of trailing energy bounced off the walls and rebounded multiple times before losing energy.

Eventually the chaos - not caused by the master himself despite him being in the room, Twilight noted sardonically - settled and everyone hunted for their bearings as the last few pieces of hurricane-twisted paper fluttered to the floor. Standing next to Twilight’s chair at the head of the table was a very proud-looking Rainbow Dash, standing at parade attention with a very satisfied grin on her face.

“I’ve got it all done, Twilight,” she reported. “All the rosters are set to be filled, equipment is being set up in the meeting hall as a gym, one of the fields outside the castle is getting prepped for goal posts and stands, locker rooms are being built into the unused East Wing, and the school is registered with the Equestria Games Department for full authorization of school teams and leagues. All that’s left is to pick out the positions, and I’m sure you already know who is the best equipped to handle the coach posi-”

“RAINBOW DASH?! What are you doing here?”

Twilight, still trying to fix her horribly tangled mane while grabbing her papers up off the floor, looked up to see the brown pegasus staring at Dash with a mix of incredulousness, disbelief, and what almost seemed to be anger.

“DUMBBELL!” Rainbow roared, her happy mood evaporating as she sent back her own glare at the stallion. “What are you doing here?”

“I asked you first Crash!”

“Yeah, well I asked second and I’m the best, so you answer first!”

“Make me!”

“Maybe I should!”

“Knock it off!” Twilight shouted as she slammed her hooves on the table with finality. She glared at the two incessned pegasi, both of whom had actually flown into each other’s faces during their shouting match. “What in Equestria are you two yelling at each other for? For Celestia’s sake, we’re supposed to be working together here as teachers, I can’t have you both fighting for no good reason! Or any reason for that matter!”

“Wait, you’re a teacher here?” both flying ponies shouted at each other. “Since when? Hey, I asked first! No you didn’t!”

“Wow, those two really like fighting,” a griffon professor noted as the two devolved into shouting over the other while Twilight tried to use her magic to separate them. “Back where I’m from if I fought with somegrif like that, one of us would be in the hospital.”

The minotaur next to the griffon huffed as she folded her arms over her chest. “Funny, where I’m from, these two would look like they’re courting each other.”

“Seriously? Pfft, that’s weird.”

“It makes more sense than you’d think actually.”

The pair of them jumped as a tub of popcorn was set on the table in front of them by a yellow aura. The two tracked the magic back to its source to see Chaos Theory leaning back in his chair wolfing down his own popcorn with the most pleased expression. He took a pause from his chowing down to turn to the griffon and minotaur and said with a smile, “I don’t care either way, I’m having far too much fun just watching.”

The pair gave each other a look, shrugged, and reached into the tub for their own bites.

Eventually Twilight got fed up with trying to come between the two fretting fliers and lit up her horn, projecting a field of magic around the both of them that froze them in mid-motion. “That. Is. Enough. Either both of you calm down right now or I will kick you out of this school myself. Understood?”

Twilight relented the time-stop field just enough to grant the two the ability to nod at her, then set them both down on opposite sides of the table. Keeping a steady eye between them Twilight lifted the field as they both landed on the floor, each looking far away from the other.

“Now, I don’t know what problem you two have between each other but I’ll say this right now; shouting at each other is NOT going to solve it, nor is almost coming to blows right in front of all of your peers. Rainbow, I would have expected you to know this already, and Dumbbell, I am disappointed that you would act like that.”

Both ponies wilted under Twilight’s disapproving words, Rainbow in particular hanging her head as her wings drooped to the floor. “Sorry Twilight,” she said.

“Yeah… so am I,” Dumbbell agreed. “I shouldn’t have acted like that just cause… I just shouldn’t have.”

“No, you shouldn’t,” Twilight said, “but we’re not going to focus on that right now. I’ll help you two deal with whatever this issue is later in private, but right now, let’s get back to the meeting.” She sat back primly in her seat to reassert order, then hesitated as she saw nearly everybody else at the table was eating from popcorn buckets. “Where did you all get those?”
“Nowhere,” was the resounding reply from everyone. Everyone but Chaos Theory that is, whose own hooves were empty of any buckets, popcorn filled or otherwise.

Twilight narrowed her eyes at Theory for a moment before deciding to just let it go for now - while adding to her tally of potential get-him-back moments - and focusing her attention on what was important at the moment. “As I was saying before… well, before, the sports department was in progress, thanks to the hard work of my friend Rainbow Dash here.”

Dash smiled weakly at Twilight before turning her gaze away again. Across the table Dumbbell stared shrewdly at her for a moment, then continued listening to Twilight.

“Once I’ve reviewed all the paperwork Dash has for me, I’ll see about posting openings for the various teams, both for players and for coaches. If you want to be coach of one of the sports teams then you will add your name to a list of applicants I provide for you, and I want to be sure everyone who does so is responsible enough to be worth the position.”

Both Dumbbell and Rainbow reacted to that statement, not by shrinking away, but gaining determined looks and tensed expressions. They spared each other a quick glance from across the table, seeing the fire of competition in the other’s eyes and declaring that the game was on.

“Now, are there any further questions on the sports department? Or shall we move on to other topics?”

“I have a question,” a male voice announced.

Twilight looked to the questioner, then sighed internally as she caught the casual smirk on Chaos Theory’s face.

And here we go…

“And what would that be, Mr. Theory?” she asked with well practiced politeness.

“Oh please, no need to be so formal Twilight,” - Twilight resisted the urge to snort - “you may call me Chaos if you wish. As for my question, it is a fairly simple one: what are your feelings on bringing in visiting experts for the purpose of illustrating a particular topic in class?”

Twilight blinked, then blinked again as she had to mentally brace herself for the unexpectedly serious topic. “Um… I suppose that would be perfectly fine to do,” she said, “so long as we plan ahead properly and provide accommodations to any visitors. Did you have anyone in particular in mind?”

Theory’s smile turned the slightest shade darker as he bowed dramatically. “Why indeed I did, Twilight. As you fine folks know, I am currently the professor for magical theory, a great deal of which is so unknown to the common being that there are few experts to be found in some of the more… underutilized fields. Thus, to help provide the best learning experience possible for my students, I would request the chance to bring in a truly knowledgeable fellow on one such topic. The finest expert in the magic of chaos the land has to offer aside from myself.”

Twilight’s eyes widened as she recognized the trap she had fallen into. Oh, don’t you do it Theory. Don’t you say what I know you’re going to say. Don’tdon’tdon’tdon’tdon’t-

“The Spirit of Chaos himself, Discord.”

“You rang?”

A dim fog appeared in the room for an instant before being blown away in a dark flash of bright shadow - what - covering their sight for a moment long enough for the great draconequs to slip into their midst. Everyone stared up at the hovering entity in stunned shock, jaws to the floor and limbs slack. Discord reared upward, towering high so he could look down at all the eyes staring up at him. Once he was sure he had all eyes upon him, he opened his mouth to speak.

“What are you all staring at? Do I have something in my teeth?”

He reached into his maw and pulled out one of his fangs with a pop, then pulling out a golden tooth from within the tooth the same size as the actual tooth.

“Ah, it seems that I did. Now… who was it that requested my presence?”

Chaos Theory stood up and bowed low. “That would be me, my good entity. I am Professor Chaos Theory, and I have been a close studier of your particular brand of magic for many years now.”

Discord smiled and slithered down so that he lay upon the table, curled just enough to not disturb Twilight’s papers but still placed in such a way to block Twilight’s view with his wagging tail.

“Oh? So I have a fan… How delightful.”

Twilight had to resist the urge to gag as Discord and Discord bragged about Discord in full view of an entire room with nobody any the wiser save for her. For all her irritation about being so badly played however, she had to give him props. It was an excellent bit of payback for her ‘nerfing’ him in his professor role.

Which would only make her future plotting against him for her own vengeance all the sweeter.

“As much as I’m sure you two are enjoying your chatting,” Twilight said, interrupting them in the middle of a set of uproarious laughter, “we do have a meeting going on. Perhaps we should get to the point that Mr. Theory was trying to put forth.”

“Oh, of course, Twilight,” both said as the same time, in the same voice.

Twilight felt a hair in her mane twang up in frustration when absolutely nobody else in the room cottoned on at the blatantly obvious clue, but managed to maintain her calm.

“Now, Discord… Mr. Theory had a suggestion that, when he gets to the parts of his course that deal with your particular brand of magic, that you would come in to help ‘demonstrate’ it for his students. Would you be amicable to this, or does that sound too demanding for you?”

By Harmony, Twilight was going to make Discord work for this victory he had obtained. He wouldn’t get to mess with her for free!

“Oh but Twilight, why would I ever turn down the chance to show my skills and usefulness to a receptive crowd? In fact, why wait?”

He’s going to say he’s going to hang around the campus at random now isn’t he?

“Why, I feel like I can contribute to the education of these bright young pupils at any time, so long as it’s not too ‘disruptive’ for the other classes of course.”

Oh yes, hello? This is Twilight, saying that I totally called that. Twilight snickered at herself. At least he didn’t copy my thoughts again this time.

Dumbbell looked between Discord, who was busy listing all the ‘wondrous’ forms of enlightened anarchy he would bring to the school, and Twilight, who was seemingly ignoring everything he was saying. “Um, Twilight, er, that is, Headmistress… Are we sure it’s a good idea to let Discord, the Avatar of Chaos itself, run, er… fly freely around the school?”

Suddenly Discord ceased his pontificating and looked down at the pony princess, as eager to hear her answer as the rest of the classroom seemed to be.

Twilight smiled slightly, taking a moment to put her papers in order - even though they had been perfectly ordered already - letting her silence extend for a bit. Eventually she looked up to the waiting draconequus… and grinned.

“I can see the reason for your concern Dumbbell, but I can assure you that there is no reason to worry. While Discord has been a disruptive influence in the past, I do believe he has grown to be something more than just a mere prankster with phenomenal cosmic power. So yes, I think it’s a perfectly fine idea for Discord to appear on campus sometimes, so long as he behaves himself.”

The rest of the teachers and professors started gossiping immediately as soon as she finished, but Twilight had eyes only for Discord, the only one to notice as his usual cheeky grin was replaced by a small but earnest smile. One she’d seen him wear only a bare few times in the years she’d known him.

Yes Discord, I do trust you, because you’ve proven you can be trusted thus far. So by all means… do. Your. Worst. She smiled and tilted her head at him while winking. Just be reasonable about it, would you please?
Discord said nothing, giving her only a minimal but powerful nod.

Sounds good to me, Twilight. Thank you, for trusting me.

Twilight blinked in surprise at hearing the voice in her head but did not feel too alarmed as Discord did a grand sweeping gesture. “You heard the fair headmistress my fellow educators! I am welcome at any time… and I shall see you all again very, very soon. Til then, tah tah…”

In a reverse of his impressive entrance, all the light in the room seemed to be sucked in towards him, forming a bright and impenetrable ball of shining magic. And then, in a moment to fast to notice, he was gone, and the light was back to where it had been as if it had never moved.

“Well that was exciting,” Chaos Theory said with a slight smirk. “And I have a feeling the rest of the year will be just as entertaining.”

Oh Theory, you have every idea how right you are.

“Indeed it was,” Twilight said vocally while the rest of the room’s occupants were seemingly still picking their jaws up off the floor. “Now then, does anyone else have any thoughts or concerns they’d like to air?”

There was no response, which Twilight was certain had everything to do with them processing the concept of a Discord shaped chaos sword hanging over their heads. Some of them seemed to think it literal, as they kept looking up at the ceiling as if expecting him to be there.

“Alright, then I officially declare this meeting to be completed. Thank you everyone for coming, you may now leave to finish whatever remaining work you have before the weekend. Remember, my office is always open, except for when I’m not there, in which case try and find Spike. I’m sure he can direct you to my whereabouts easily enough. Have a good weekend everybody!”

Slowly, as if moving reluctantly out of a crazy dream, the room began to empty. As they all left, Twilight favored Rainbow and Dumbbell with stern glances, reminding them most keenly that she had not forgotten their earlier outbursts and would be dealing with them in due time. Both shuddered a bit under her gaze but also stared back at her and nodded, acknowledging her decree with their own promise to listen. Finally, the only ones left in the room were herself and Chaos Theory. She sat patiently, waiting to see what he would say but he did not speak. Instead, he merely inclined his muzzle to her, gave her a knowing look, then proceeded out the door.

Twilight watched him go, a satisfied smile on her face. Discord may have ‘won’ this round, but she didn’t really mind. It was a victory that he had earned, even if he had tricked his way to it. She was willing to let him have it, because in the end she knew he deserved it, and the cost to her was minimal. With all the crazy and dangerous things she had been through in her life, having to deal with the occasional bout of anarchy at her school was a small price to pay for rewarding trust well placed.

Besides, she thought to herself as she began making her own way out of the room, it just gives me even more opportunities to get him back. Bring it on Discord. I’m ready to play your game...

Author's Note

So... Yeah, I'm not even going to pretend to have an excuse this time. Quite frankly, I completely ran out of ideas for this story a long time ago, then I forgot about it, moved on to other works, including the likes of actual work and school, then I was reminded about it by a friend and thought, 'Man I should really do something about that'. And well... here we are. All I can really say is sorry. Sorry for taking so long in actually continuing this story, sorry for not communicating my thoughts on it for so long, and sorry for just being generally very lazy and selfish in general. I've known for years that my laziness and apathy were my worst traits, but knowing that and doing something about it are two different things. So now... this is me trying to do something about it. Hope it works out, both for my sake and yours. Whatever the case, hope you've enjoyed the story so far, enjoy the new chapter, and enjoy where the story goes in the future. A future that it does have. For real this time. Just... don't expect a reliable time table on it, okay? I do have a lot on my plate round about now, and to be honest, my pool of ideas for this story is still rather shallow. If you have any suggestions for what I could/should do, feel free to hit me up in a PM and we can discuss it. For now, this is me... signing off.

Chapter 6

Embracing Chaos Chapter 6

When Twilight stepped into the new gymnasium, build out of the previously unused far east wing of the castle, she hadn’t known what exactly to expect. She had never been much of an athletic student during any part of her school career and what few memories she had of mandatory P.E. were old and faded. So when she had to duck her head as soon as she entered the room to avoid a rogue dodgeball flying straight at her, she was somewhat nonplussed.

“Sorry about that!”

Twilight looked up to see Rainbow’s familiar profile zooming towards her, an apologetic look on her face.

“I’m not interrupting anything am I?” Twilight asked as she picked up the formerly dangerous ball and passed it to Rainbow with her magic.

“Nah, Twi. I was just testing… stuff.”

Twilight lifted an eyebrow. “Stuff?”

“Yeah, lots of stuff.” Rainbow waved her arm around the gym, prompting Twilight to look around the room without distractions of dodging fast-moving rubber. The hall, just as large as the others spread out around the castle, had dramatically changed since Twilight last saw it. The previously stone floor had been smoothed over with slick wood paneling, while the walls was covered by thick and plush-looking padding stretching all the way to the ceiling. Stacked up against the walls were lines of folded up stands, racks of sports gear and equipment, and piles of various kinds of balls.

“Wow,” Twilight said. “Impressive work Rainbow, you got this place set up really quickly.”

“Yeah, but I had some help.” Rainbow settled on the floor next to Twilight, moving the ball she was carrying onto her back and rolling it back and forth across her wings. “Turns out a lot of those construction guys you used to fix up the castle are still around as some of the students, so they provided a lot of the pony-power I needed. They also built some locker rooms over on the other side of the hall.” She pointed to the far end of the gym, where Twilight could see a pair of doors marked with a stallion on one and a mare on the other. “Pretty lucky for me, cause I don’t know squat about plumbing.”

“I do actually, but for reasons I’d prefer not to go into…” Twilight said to herself, ignoring Rainbow’s confused glance her way. “Still, very well done Rainbow. Everything’s all set for the first set of classes then?”

Rainbow nodded, flicking her wing so that the ball flew upward then catching it in her outstretched hoof as it came back down. “Totally! Like I said, I was just testing stuff against the walls, making sure the padding was working.” She tossed the ball into the air just high enough for her to turn around and buck it at full power towards the wall. The ball hurtled towards the surface at blazing speed, yet when it hit the padding all momentum was lost in an instant and it collapsed peacefully to the floor.

“Absorbent,” Twilight observed.

“Very,” Rainbow agreed. “That stuff’s cushiony enough to take most of my crashes without even bruising a feather. I was tempted to cover the floor in the same stuff buuuut it kinda makes it hard to walk sooo…”

“I can see why that would be problematic,” Twilight allowed. “So that covers safety concerns, but what about sports availability? Do we have enough equipment for everything that students would want to play?”

“Yep.” Rainbow stuck her wing out to count on her primary feathers. “We’ve covered hoofball, dodgeball, cloudball, and that weird kicking sport the minotaurs do. I think it’s called ‘football’ or something? I don’t know, it’s weird.”

“I’ve been told that the translated term in Equish is soccer,” Twilight supplied helpfully. “And that’s great! Very nice work Rainbow.”

Rainbow rubbed the back of her mane with one hoof. “Eh, I can’t take all the credit. Those construction ponies really know what they are doing. I just had to tell them where to put everything and they got it done in ten hours flat. But, uh, don’t be afraid to give me some credit. Cause I am awesome enough to deserve it…”

With a roll of her eyes Twilight smiled at Rainbow graciously. “I think you’ve garnered enough praise already Rainbow. That said, you might be able to earn a bit more if you help me out with something.”

“Sure, anything you need Twi,” Rainbow said immediately.

Twilight grinned broadly. “Wonderful. So, what advice would you give me on pranking Discord then?”

Rainbow stared blankly at her for a second and then burst out laughing. “That’s hilarious Twilight. Good one! You’re getting better at fooling me. You sounded so serious about that one. Now really, what did you want my help with?”

Twilight did not respond, merely stared right back at Rainbow with a slight smile.

3… 2… 1…

“Oh my Celestia, you’re serious.”

“As serious I can be about planning pranks,” Twilight snarked, “but yes. So… any ideas?”

Rainbow sputtered for several seconds, then forced herself to take a breath and knead her temples with her hooves. “Twilight, let me be clear here. I am a great pranker. Not good, great. I’ve gotten one over on pretty much everypony in Ponyville at least once. Heck, I even got the entire Wonderbolt team once, minus Soarin and Spitfire.”

“Oh, what did you do?” Twilight interrupted.

Rainbow smirked. “Got them to spend an extra two days training for a really tough and complicated routine that we weren’t actually gonna be doing in the next show. Did it by tricking the training scheduler that I had orders from Spitfire and I was exempt because I had to play messenger back and forth to her while she was at Canterlot. They hated me for days about it, but they couldn’t prove I did anything so I got off completely clean.”

Rainbow’s face hardened as she continued. “But all that pales in comparison to what Discord can do. Not only can he just alter reality with a snap of his fingers, I’m pretty sure he’s got some kind of sense that lets him know everything that’s going on around him that’s related to him in some way.”

Twilight’s eyes widened at that and she mentally readied her notes. “What makes you say that?”

“Because I actually tried to prank him once,” Rainbow admitted. “This was a long time ago, mind you. Back when I was young and foolish-”

Twilight lifted an eyebrow at her.

“Okay, more young and foolish. I wanted to get back at him for causing my mane to strobe with all its colors while I was out night-flying, so I went and got some rainbow mix from the cloud factories and went to dump it on him while he was napping.”

Rainbow got an annoyed expression on her face as she hugged her tail.

“Next thing I know ALL of my hair was rainbow colored except for my tail, which was completely blank. And… curly…”

“How did he know you were coming? I assume you were quiet.”

“I was SILENT!” Rainbow roared. “More than that, I knew for a FACT he was asleep, and had been for half an hour. And yet no sooner did I try to tip the bucket then he woke up and did his magic to make me look like the fool. I’m telling you right now Twilight, any attempt to prank Discord directly is NOT going to work.”

Twilight hummed in thought, tapping her hoof as she did. “I suppose that’s something to consider carefully…”

“Why do you even want to prank him anyway?” Rainbow asked in a shrewd tone. “I’ve never known you to prank anypony unless you felt they had a lesson to learn.”

Smiling, Twilight simply shrugged in answer. “I just felt it was the right thing to do. He’s been making a habit in the since school started of pushing my buttons in every tiny way he can, and I think it’s time for me to push back in a way he’ll understand and appreciate. For too long I’ve tried to stand on the high ground and not play into his games, and it’s gotten me nowhere.”

The alicorn smiled, smiled in a way Rainbow had not seen from her in a very long time. It sent a shiver of fear down the flyer’s back, but also a hint of anticipation. Anticipation borne of her prankster’s experience, mimicked in Twilight’s look of playful malice.

“Discord has had control of the board for too long. Time for him to face an opposing force. And while he’s here at this school, I will be the one to control the board.”

Rainbow still felt that bit of worry about the mere idea of going up against Discord, but seeing Twilight’s expression sent those last warning pleas fleeing for cover. She smiled at Twilight with her usual brash zeel, chuckling darkly.

“Now that, Twilight… THAT is the prankster’s spirit! And if you have that, I think we’ll be able to prank Discord just fine. So, did you have anything in mind?”

“A few half formed ideas,” Twilight answered, “but nothing solid. I was gonna wait until I could hear your advice first.”

Rainbow nodded understandingly. “Not a bad idea. Best to have an experienced prankster on hoof when going after the big targets. And I’m pretty sure Discord is the biggest target that ever existed, like, ever! So… what were your first ideas?”

With a flash of her horn Twilight poofed a parchment into existence, allowing it to unfold. To Rainbow’s surprise the thing only stretched down to the floor instead of rolling out behind Twilight for several feet like usual.

“Well my first idea was to reorganize his classroom while he wasn’t there, but I figured that he’d barely notice something like that since it’s different every time I visit him. I have no idea how he keeps track of everything.”

Rainbow shrugged. “Everypony’s got their own ways of stashing their stuff. What else you got?”

Twilight shifted the scroll upward a bit. “Next was the idea of forcing him to take over another class for a day, math for example, so that he’d be bored. I think you can guess why I dropped that idea very quickly.”

The pegasus shuddered at the thought of Discord being in charge of a P.E. class. “Yeah… let’s just keep moving from that.”

“Okay, my third idea was just to take tea with him and do nothing interesting at all while not letting him leave.”

Rainbow blinked. “That… doesn’t sound like a bad idea actually. For someone like Discord who is… um spatic?”

“Spastic I think you mean.”

“Yeah, spastic. Heck, that sounds like a great idea, why not just go with that?”

Twilight huffed in annoyance. “Because he already does exactly that with Fluttershy once a week! And enjoys it! A lot!”

“Maybe that’s just because it’s Fluttershy?” Rainbow offered. “I mean, their whole friendship is kinda weird anyway. In a good way but still.”

“No, I’m pretty sure he finds me ‘interesting’ as well for some reason. Celestia knows why. So yes, that plan is out.” Another rotation of the scroll. “My next idea was to mess with him when he’s disguised as Chaos Theory and continually obliquely reference the fact that he’s, well, Discord, while he’s unable to admit to it. I dropped that for two reasons. One, I’m pretty sure he’d find a way to turn that around on me very quickly. I’m smart and all, but I’m not all that clever at manipulating ponies by trickery.”

“You really don’t need to be. You can just manipulate ponies with friendship!”

Twilight glared in Rainbow’s direction, then ignored her so she could continue.

“The second reason I decided not to go by that method was that I remembered Discord can apparently just make copies of himself, so the moment I start invoking him he’d show up and be in two places at once as two different people. So no, that one won’t work either.” Twilight groaned and tossed the scroll off behind her. “Gah, why is this so hard?!”

Rainbow fluttered over and drapped a calming wing over Twilight’s shoulders. “Hey, relax. It’s really not that bad, Twi. Think of it this way: working hard to make up a good prank for a friend just shows them how much you care about them by messing with them the right way.”

Twilight stared sidelong at Rainbow suspiciously. “I find that logic a bit suspect.”

“Hey, who’s the pranking expert here? Trust me, once he gets over being annoyed, he’ll love that you went through all the effort. And… probably go through a bunch of his own effort to get you back for it, but that’s all just part of the experience.”

Twilight got a faraway look in her eye as she said, “I am suddenly questioning my reasoning for this endeavor.”

Rainbow facewinged then jumped around so she was facing Twilight directly. “Look, Twilight, let’s refocus here. You want to prank Discord to show him that you can have fun at his expense and to remind him that you are in charge around here right? Well if that’s the case, then you have to do something that takes away his fun somehow.”

“Take away his fun?” Twilight asked. “How do you take away the fun from a reality warper?”

Rainbow was quiet for a bit, sitting back on her haunch as she pondered. Twilight let her think, quietly retrieve her scroll and rolling it back up, knowing that the remaining 15 ideas she’d written down probably wouldn’t be worth much at this point. Instead, she started analyzing Rainbow’s advice for herself, looking at Discord in a critical light.

If there was one constant about Discord - for a given value of ‘constant’ in a chaos creature - it was that he used his powers all the time, often as an extension of his expressions and emotions, when he wasn’t just trying to mess around. At any given moment he was using his abilities to alter something around him, or on him, to suit his impulses. Temporarily removing that ability from him would be potent, but a bit too cruel in Twilight’s opinion. It was core to who he was, she couldn’t just take that away from him for the sake of a joke. Then she hit upon something.

“But what if I altered it?” she muttered to herself.

Rainbow looked up at the sound. “What’s that Twi?”

“What if I altered Discord’s power to change reality?” Twilight repeated more loudly. “Not change his ability to affect change, but alter how it changes!”

Rainbow looked at her in bemusement. “I think ‘change’ is starting to lose meaning for me here. What do you mean exactly?”

Twilight excitedly flapped her wings as she teleported a blank sheet of parchment in front of her, immediately starting to jot down notes even as her mouth kept moving. “Discord is always using abilities whenever he does much of anything, usually to make things cooky or weird for the sake of his amusement. So, what if I change his power so that when he changes things, things don’t get weird or crazy! What if they did the opposite?”

Rainbow was quiet for a moment as she digested that, then her eyes widened in shock. “That’s… that’s awesome! Can you do it?”

Twilight waved her off with a hoof. “Pfft, can I? Should be the simplest thing in the world. All I have to do is… actually, I think I’ll keep the mechanism to myself in this case. I want it to be a surprise to more than just Discord.”

Rainbow just smiled and said, “Now you’re getting it, Twi! And I say go for it. You’ve got a great idea, now go and make it happen! Oh, and let me know when you go and do it. I wanna see the look on Discord’s face when he realizes.”

“Oh trust me Rainbow,” Twilight said, a menacing smile gracing her face. “You’ll get plenty of opportunity to see my prank in action. After all, the way I have it planned, who says I need to only do it once?”

Professor Chaos Theory walked into his room in the teacher’s dorms with a proud smile on his face, content with another day of educating his students on the finer points of how magic was perfectly chaotic when it wanted to be. And when he wanted it to be, but that went without saying. Once he’d locked the door behind him he flashed out of his assumed form and lounged in the air with his hands behind his head, staring up at the floor filled with happy thoughts.

“So, how do I want to customize my room tonight, hmm?” he asked himself.

“My vote would be for an underwater fire temple,” he answered himself.

“No no, that won’t do,” he argued with himself. “We did that last week after all.”

“How about the garden in the sky made of metal ferns plan?” he suggested to himself. “It’s been some time since we did that, and I found some remarkable plants in Everfree recently that have inspired me!”

“All good options,” he congratulated himself, “but for today I think we go for the old, gold standby.”

“General Chaos?” his selfs all asked.

“Exactly and positively!”

All the Discords snapped their claws all at once, and the room… remained exactly the same.

Discords immediately froze in place and flung his gazes around the still blandly normal room in utter shock. Stroking his beards, he experimentally snapped again, focusing solely on the bed this time, with an aim for making it suitably comedic for his tastes. Instead, the bed, if anything, somehow became more bland, transforming into a mere mattress and frame in the most muted flash of light he’d ever seen.

“What in the blazes is going on here?” Discords asked in tandem. Sufficiently frustrated the parts reformed into a whole again, allowing Discord to stroke his beard in the singular. Curious, he attempted to summon an artifact into the room, anything at all, not even concentrating on what he wanted. A pop and a blink of light appeared, as expected, but all that came out was a rush of wind. Another snap, this time intended to mimic the previous effect, much as it goaded him to copy something without alteration. This time though something solid did appear. A simple, plain, completely ordinary rock, which fell to the group with a limp thud.

“Seriously? A rock? Not even a crystal filled rock? Or rock candy? Or rock crab? Just a rock!”

Discord stared at the offending rock in silence for a bit before deciding enough was enough. Instead of snapping, Discord wound his leg up for a kick, winding and winding until his leg was coiled over itself like a spring. When he released, he imbued his foot with a idea of causing the rock to fly about like a bouncy ball. Instead, and almost entirely expected at this point, when his foot collided with the piece of stone, it merely flipped over on the ground a few times before falling still, leaving Discord fuming both from his failed ploy and a bruised foot.

For several long minutes he tried everything he could think of to subvert this strange effect that was limiting his powers, but all of them fell short in some way. Trying to convert the floor into cheese? Became an even harder kind of granite that was rougher than before. Make thirteen copies of his bed stand and stack them like a tower of cards? The stand just rotated in place a few times before coming to a stop. Create an aurora borealis at that time of day, at that time of year, in this part of Equestria localized entirely in his room. All he got were a few sparkles.

Purple and pink ones.

Discord narrowed his eyes at the sight, but with the ghost of a smile on his lips. Thinking quickly, Discord summoned a portal to his home dimension and slipped through, testing his powers out there. One fall-water made of breadsticks later, and he had a reasonable idea of what was going on.

“Well, well, well,” Discord muttered to himself as he stepped back into Equestria. “Seems somepony has gotten it into their pretty purple head that they think they can mess with me. And I must say, well played indeed for an opening move, but the hand has now been set. The ball is in my court now.”

Suddenly, a flash of purple light appeared in front of him, allowing a thin sheet of parchment to float out of its depths. Discord promptly snagged the note and held it up to read, his eyes narrowing as he did.

Bring it on, Discord. Let the games begin. Oh, and if you ever want to call it quits, just say the magic word. You know the one.

Discord scoffed, moving quickly into unabashed laughter. “Oh please, Twilight. As if I would e-”

A second note appeared, cutting him off by swishing through the air right into his face. Prying it off, he read through it.

Sorry, but you’re gonna have to mean it if you want it to count. Nice try though. See you tomorrow~

P.S. This is only between us, nobody else. Remember that.

The note disappeared in another flash of light, leaving Discord hovering in his room with an eager grin on his face.

“Oh my dear, sweet Twilight… I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

Author's Note

Whelp... here we are again. Only half a year between uploads this time. Golly, what an improvement...
*Ahem* Long delay aside, progress is progress, so I'm not gonna waste any more time bemoaning my horribleness. Besides, writing that last part reminded me how fun just cutting loose and letting Discord be Discord can be. Even when I'm intentionally neutering him. But now that the prank war has began, maybe I can actually get some gosh darn ideas a flowing eh?
That said, if any of you lot come up with anything, PLEASE share it with me. The well isn't quite dry, but it's on the verge of drought, and I could use a bit of rain to fill it back up, you know? Anywho, hope you all enjoy, and see you next time. Baio.

Chapter 7

Embracing Chaos Chapter 7

Spike was a strange dragon, he knew this intimately. He was raised by ponies, had a unicorn-turned-alicorn for a big sister, liked to be kind and respectful as a matter of course, and most of all, he could tolerate paperwork. If there was any one thing that most dragons could not stand, it was boring, tedious things like paperwork, but Spike had enough practice and experience with it that it was only mildly annoying to be caught doing it. Being Twilight’s assistant for years though had let him easily adjust to the necessity of it, even deriving a bit of pride in doing it so well that he received praise for his punctuality and penmanship. Not many dragons could claim to be well liked by many bureaucrats, but like with many other things Spike was the exception to the rule.

So it was that Spike often found himself hanging out in Twilight’s office long after school hours had gone by, keeping track of all the paperwork that escaped Twilight’s notice while she took a more direct hoof in running the school. Not that he minded. She was the more personable one after all. Spike was perfectly happy with his own work and hanging out with his friends in his off time.

It also meant he wasn’t in the crossfire for the recent conflict which had been raging up and down the halls of the school, unlike most of the rest of the students and faculty. No, he got to sit back and see the aftermath from a safe (and hilarious) distance.

A knock on the door put paid to his thoughts as Twilight marched in, a flat frown on her face.

“He got you again didn’t he?” Spike asked casually, not even looking up from his attendance record.

She merely glared back at him silently in response, one eye nearly imperceptibly twitching.

“What did he do this time?”

Twilight glared for a second longer, then sighed and lifted her head roofward, almost as if asking the hidden sky above what she had done to deserve this treatment. Finally she left her wallowing and said a single word.

“Books.”

Spike blinked in mid-pen stroke, then looked up at Twilight curiously.

“He messed with the library?” he asked.

Twilight shook her head and again said, “Books.”

“He… read a book?”

Twilight huffed. “Books. Books.”

It took him a moment to process but eventually Spike hinged upon an answer. “Oooooh, he made it so you can only say books. Heh, that’s actually kinda clever.”

Twilight glared at him again and marched over to her desk to mope some more.

“I’m not sure what you’re complaining about Twilight. You are the one that started this whole thing to begin with. Discord’s just continuing the game you set up. Besides, on my personal scoreboard you’re still ahead by a hair.”

Twilight perked up at hearing that. “Books? Books books?” She heard herself speak and facehoofed in annoyance again.

Spike smiled and hopped out of his seat, turning to the wall behind him. “I’ve been keeping track of every prank you and Discord have been playing over the last two weeks and, with a little outside help, keeping score of who’s had the better performance.”

“Books?”

“Ah ah ah!” Spike said warningly while he scrambled in a pile of scrolls. “I can’t say who just yet, it would spoil the surprise!”

Twilight pouted slightly, then paused as she realized something. “Books… books books books?”

Spike was head-deep in the pile when she spoke, but he still managed to hear her. Excellent dragon senses and whatnot. “I took an interpretive language course a few years ago, one of the segments was learning how to understand speech that was otherwise unintelligible. I got the best grades in the class on that topic.”

Twilight made a weird sound that was a cross between ‘huh’ and ‘book’ while Spike finally found the scroll he’d been looking for and unrolled it along the wall.

“For the opening round you were given 5 points for effectively shutting down Discord’s powers in an amusing way,” Spike said, pointing to the column just under Twilight’s name. It went down for several feet, marked along the way with dates and notes highlighted by a big number, colored purple for herself and brown for Discord.

“Next was Discord’s big counter, which was converting every flat surface in your office into a fun-house mirror. That one was admittedly pretty funny, but that was more me just enjoying the opportunity rather than laughs at your expense, so he only got 2 points for it.”

Twilight huffed and muttered something in Bookish that Spike didn’t catch, though he could guess at what she said fairly easily.

“Disorienting isn’t the same thing as disruptive, Twilight. Besides, shouldn’t you be glad he got less points?”

Twilight shook her head, saying, “Books books. Books books books books.”

Spike eyed her weirdly. “Fair? You do know this is Discord right?”

“Books books,” Twilight replied firmly.

The little dragon shrugged and returned to the list. “Anyway, your counter move to that was to interrupt Discord’s lunch the next day by turning his weird spaghetti-pastry thing into plain ramen, which was pretty basic by itself, but I really liked the touch of it becoming more and more flavorless every time he tried to change it. That got 3 points for a good execution of a very simple trick.”

Twilight nodded agreeably at that, then froze as she seemed to recall what happened immediately afterward from that point.

“That afternoon, Discord struck back, and boy did he strike back hard. I don’t think anybody got any kind of studying done for the next couple days in the library. Or any sleep in the dorms from the sheer noise level.”

“Books… books books.”

Spike nodded. “Yeah, having all the books say what they were about out loud isn’t a bad idea, just… not every single one of them at once.” He tapped his claw on the null mark on that part of the sheet. “As a result of the ‘collateral damage’, he got no points for that one. Discord learned from his mistake pretty quick though, cause the next one was way more targeted.”

“BOOKS!”

“Yeah, yeah, we all saw that one Twi. Though you gotta admit, having your mane glittering and sparkling like that was kinda neat once you put shades on. And hey, maybe it was a preview of what your mane will look like when you get to Celestia’s age, who knows? 5 points for that one, mostly because of how bad you took it.”

“BOOKS!”

“Geez, lighten up, Twilight. It was just extra light, nothing ridiculous. That was saved for what you got up to next.” His claw scrolled down to Twilight’s next point, which was a 1.

“Books books?”

“Yes only 1,” Spike responded sternly, “cause this one was very close to being mean-spirited, Twi. It’s one thing to shut down his powers by making them bland, it’s quite another to make him make things orderly.”

Twilight hung her head, sighing. “Books books books…”

“We know you didn’t know. Only Fluttershy knew what would happen to Discord if he was forced to be orderly. That’s why you still got a point for it, even if it was only one.” Spike looked back at the scroll, pointing to a few days worth of blank spots. “You guys took a bit of a break after that one, but then Discord made his real play.”

“Books. Books books books books.”

“Involving the Princesses in the joke was a fair play, especially since you were still the one targeted.”

“Books books.”

Spike shook his head at her. “It would have gone a lot better if you had just gone along with it rather than try to ignore the fact that you were swapping tribes every few minutes.”

“Books? Books books books.”

“Easy? No, but still doable surely. Anyway, Discord got 4 points for that one. The next day though, you really hit it out of the park.”

Twilight preened. “Books books books books.”

“I don’t think Discord would have ever seen it coming. I mean, making yourself out to be the Draconequs of Order? Totally brilliant. Full five points, and we almost wanted to score you more just for the level of success. Still, it was very well done and I don’t think I’ve ever seen Discord more shocked.”

“Books books books,” Twilight pointed out.

Spike shrugged. “Eh, maybe, but I think he liked this surprise a lot more than when he got turned to stone again. Anyway, most of the stuff after that was a lot more minor,” he said while trailing his claw through a whole week on the scroll, filled with 2s and 3s and the occasional 1. “And that brings us to today, with your trick of making Discord’s copies of himself turn out as Fluttershy, which netted you two points… and Discord’s riposte.” He smirked at her. “How much do you think he should get for this one?”

Twilight sighed. “Books… books books.”

“4 huh? That’s nice of you to say. I was gonna say just 3, but if you think it’s worth it, I’ll bump up my score. Now, let’s ask our second judge what he thinks shall we?”

Before Twilight could ask in Bookish who he meant, Spike snapped his claws, followed swiftly by an eruption of purple mist between them.

“Ah, is it time for the day’s point measure then, my good drake?” Discord asked as he floated out of the mist with a self-satisfied smirk.

“BOOKS!?”

Discord’s smirk disappeared just as fast as the mist, evaporating as if it had never been as he whirled around so hard his head was twisted out of angle of his body.

“Twilight?! What are you… what is she doing here?” he said as he rounded on a still smiling Spike. “I thought we agreed she would not be told of my involvement as a judge!”

“Not exactly,” Spike corrected. “You suggested she not be told, I said I’d make my mind up about it later.”

Discord glared at him furiously but held back from responding as he realized he had indeed not gotten a solid answer out of the drake at the time. “Well why now, then? Is it merely to ruin our fun?”

“BOOKS! BOOKS BOOKS BOOKS BOOKS?”

“Because Spike asked me to,” Discord told her reasonably. “He wanted to organize things but wanted a second opinion.”

“And before you ask why I didn’t go to Rainbow,” Spike said quickly as he could see Twilight about to do just that, “I was worried she might be biased in your favor.”

Twilight just looked at him, then thrust her arm and wing at Discord, prompting the draconequs to recoil.

“Ah, I am APPALLED at your lack of trust in me, Twilight,” Discord said. “Do you truly think so little of me that I would ever seek to give myself unfair advantage in this personal competition of amusement?”

Twilight narrowed her eyes at him with clear suspicion. “Books books books… books books.”

Discord gazed right back at her, stroking his beard thoughtfully. “Hmm… fair enough I suppose. But, I will not have my honor besmirched even by realistic concern. Thus, I will make this promise: I have not, nor will ever, overrate my judgement of my points, nor underrate the judgement of my opposition’s points, in seeking a personal advantage.” He then had a copy of himself - still shaped like Fluttershy, complete with her veterinary outfit - help him fulfill the motions of a Pinkie Promise.

Spike moved over to Twilight so he could drape an arm over her shoulders. “See Twilight? Perfectly reasonable. He’s the one who’s constantly put you ahead in this thing anyway.”

“Books?” Twilight asked.

“Quite so, Headmistress,” Discord said as he settled onto the floor, coiling up like an overgrown furry snake. “Your issued challenge wasn’t just to mock me. It was to test yourself against me, to see if you could match wits with me in my domain. How could I ever do anything less than grant you a fair shot at it?”

“Books,” Twilight said with surprise. “Books books books books books.”

“Honor means different things to different people, Twilight,” Discord said with an oddly serious tone. “To some, it is loyalty to your employers or family. To others, working to fulfill a dream or ideal is the way to go. But in my estimation, there is no higher honor than being true to yourself. Letting who you truly are define what you can and should be.”

Spike and Twilight shared a look of surprise before the young drake said, “That’s… that’s very interesting for you to say, Discord. I think that explains a lot about you.”

“Hopefully not too much,” Discord replied cadily. “The Master of Chaos should have some mysteries around him, after all.”

“Books. Books books books books books… books books.”

Discord bowed his head to Twilight gracefully. “I welcome your try at such investigation, Twilight. I’m sure it will be your greatest challenge of friendship yet.”

Spike looked between the two, trying to figure out just what their expressions were trying to say but not quite piecing it together. He wasn’t sure if they knew either.

“Okay then, so… now that that whole thing is settled, I think I’ll punch in my ticket for tonight. If you need me Twilight, I’ll be in the cafeteria making a sapphire souffle.”

Spike bowed his way out, accepting a muted Bookish goodbye from Twilight and a rather more ostentatious farewell fanfare - complete with trumpet fans - from Discord. As he closed the door behind him he couldn’t help but shake his head in confusion.

“Why is it that Discord’s friendships are always so weird? Is it cause of the chaos? Or… is he just attracted to crazy people? … Nah, it’s definitely the chaos.”

And with that, Spike departed on his way to the kitchens, looking forward to cooking himself a gloriously sweet dinner with his own two claws, in a way no ‘normal’ dragon would ever be caught dead doing.

After all, only the truly crazy thing they are sane.

Twilight and Discord stared at each other as Spike left the room, both stewing in their own thoughts. Taking a moment to try and ignore the surprisingly tasty smell of Discord’s most recent literalism - as she had coined them - Twilight coughed expectantly at the Chaos entity.

“Oh very well, I suppose the joke’s played out at this point.” Discord brought his palms together with a loud smack, which sounded like the halves of a book being brought together, and Twilight felt the strange weight on her tongue lift.

“Thank you, Discord,” Twilight said primly, fluttering her wings slightly to resettle. “So… now that we’ve been doing this little prank war for a while, what are your thoughts on my performance as a whole?”

Discord grinned, slithering through the air to coil around the scoreboard Spike had been using. “I thought the evidence of my feelings was made clear by the scores, my dearest Sparkle. It has been a close race indeed, but you have done admirably in besting me on more than one occasion and playing along with a few of my better jokes.” He watched Twilight shrug at that, pursing his lips before grinning again. “You feel differently?”

“I… maybe?” Twilight paused a moment to collect her thoughts, tapping her hoof to her chin. “I guess I’m just… surprised you thought so highly of my work. I know I was enjoying it, but I didn’t think you’d be so impressed. You’ve been doing stuff like this since… actually I don’t even know how old you are. Does anybody know? Do you?”

Discord split his head down the middle so he could say, “Yes and No,” twice in opposite orders. When Twilight merely tilted her head at him in confusion he refused to clarify. “I am unsure of my exact age because I don’t know what age really means to me. Where you and the other alicorns are ‘conventionally’ immortal through the benefit of never aging, I am not quite sure if time has any real effect on me at all. After all, I can move through time in more than just one direction.”

Twilight felt her heart skip a beat and her brain short-circuit as she heard that, flashes of alternative Equestrias streaking across her mind. “H-how do you mean?”

Discord conjured a clock in his paw, moving the hands with his claws forward and backward with no regard to each other. “It’s nothing so concrete and dangerous as what Starlight did, have no fear. I cannot alter history or the future to any true degree, merely witness it and perhaps enjoy throwing reality for a loop for some brief seconds before time snaps back into its proper place. Then of course there is moving sideways in time.”

Before Twilight could go any further on the fritz Discord sent a static shock to realign her cognitive process onto its correct track. “W-what… you… What?”

“Confounding, isn’t it?” Discord said with a grin. “Trust me, time travel magic is far more trouble than it's worth, even for one such as me, so I rarely bother with it, save for a few times when I require… inspiration.” His last word was spoken as a whisper while he looked at Twilight strangely, causing her to quirk an eyebrow at him. “But I suppose we are getting off the original topic, are we not? As for why I so much enjoyed our games? It’s because you did not treat this as an attempt to put me down or insult me, but rather were focused on playing my kind of games on my terms… and succeeded.”

Twilight couldn’t help grinning, though she filed away the odd words from the sentence before for later consideration. “I will admit, it was a lot more fun than I expected going in, even if it caused me more than a few headaches both dealing with your pranks and coming up with my own. It was a nice distraction from work, even if I enjoy my work here so much. Hmm… it’s funny, thinking about how different our relationship is from when we first tried to reform you. Back then I was so sure you’d go right back to being your old self I was a hair’s breadth away from blasting you at a moment’s notice. Now I’m plotting the next scheme to mess with your head.”

Discord lounged in the air on his upside down chair lounge, a casual smile on his face. “Tis the beauty of time and familiarity. Looking beyond the surface to find the fascinating person beneath. Of course I always found you fascinating, Miss Sparkle, but my reasons for doing so have changed as of late.”

Twilight blinked and narrowed her eyes at him. “Changed how?”

Discord flinched, the chair folding over and around him as he fell to the floor, coughing and sputtering.

“Woah, are you okay?” Twilight asked, getting out of her chair. She was held back by Discord thrusting his hand up through the chair bottom with his thumb up before snapping and reappearing upright before her, albeit with the chair still lodged around his form. He was looking away from her and acting rather shiftily as he tried to physically pull the chair off of him.

“Fine, just fine, Twilight, really. Oh goodness will you look at the time,” he said as he pointed to the clock he had conjured, which was showing it was Foot and Mouth time. “I really must be going, so much to do for class tomorrow. Tah tah!” With one final wrench he yanked himself out of the chair, leaving it a crumpled mess on the ground as he disappeared with a snap and pop.

Twilight stared at the spot he had disappeared to blankly for a while, trying to guess just what had caused Discord to hastily retreat so quickly. “Hmm… always found me fascinating, but reason has changed…”

She looked at the scoreboard, seeing the visual record of the past weeks of zany back and forth between them. The prank war, the teasing. The proper friendship they’d developed after years of tense acquaintance at best. And the lingering feeling that there was something else below the surface she didn’t really recognize.

“Changed to what?”

Author's Note

I'm not going to bother saying much here, I think. There's not much to say, honestly. I have mostly forgot about this story for the last whatever-the-heck-it's-been and part of that was due to kinda falling out of interest in the story, and partly due to a lack of motivation to write in general. However apparently people are still reading this and wanting to see more, so I've decided that I should get off my lazy butt and go ahead and finish this thing, if only so I don't have the specter of it lingering in my mind anymore. I make no promises for when the next chapter may be out, as it has been so long since I touched this story I have no clue where I was going with it, but I will endeavor to finish this thing once and for all so I can use the brain-space it takes up taunting me for something else.
And hey, maybe I can have a bit of fun with it in the meantime. Cheers everyone, and stay safe out there.

Chapter 1

Embracing Chaos Chapter 1

As she walked through the bustling halls of the ancient castle turned university, Princess — now Headmistress — Twilight Sparkle couldn’t help but smile at the sight of her dream coming to life around her. When Princess Celestia had come to Twilight with the idea of creating a new school of magic open to everypony, not just unicorns, Twilight had asked her who she wanted to lead such a project and how she could help. Then the older princess had explained that she meant for Twilight to be the leader and Twilight had spent the next fifteen minutes hopping around the room shouting, “Yes! Yes! YES!”

For the next three months the purple alicorn had been racing back and forth across Equestria searching for more than a dozen different things, each one absolutely necessary for the proper functioning of a school. Foremost amongst these problems was where the school should be located. Canterlot was out of the question almost immediately, space in the mountainside city being at an absolute premium and Celestia’s own magical school already taking up the niche. Manehatten sported a similar problem, as the city was already a hub of learning for many different schools of thought and having little room to build yet another. Twilight had searched up and down the country for another city that could play host to her school, but none of them had the right combination of central positioning, population, and open space to work.

Funnily enough (in hindsight at least) the solution appeared right near Twilight’s current home of Ponyville. While the town itself was far too small to support a university of the size the Princess of Friendship and Learning (oh how she had squeed when she got that title) had planned, it was situated very near a place that would be a perfect fit for Twilight’s requirements. The long abandoned Castle of the Two Sisters, the original capital of Equestria all those thousands of years ago.

The idea had come to her after her friend Fluttershy had mentioned visiting the empty palace several times to take care of the bats that called the place home. Memories of her visits to the ancient library housed within and the sheer size of the building had formed an instant fit with the plans she’d had swimming in her mind for the last few months. As soon as the idea had struck her she sent a missive to Celestia asking for permission to use the castle and begin the desperately needed remodeling of the withering building. The sun princess had happily approved the idea and told her former student, “It will be so wonderful to see my old home have a purpose again. Whatever you need for the remodel is yours Twilight. Good luck, or as Luna just told me over my shoulder, go nuts.”

Luna’s words had turned out to be darn near prophetic as the true extent of the ancient castle’s problems came to light. Even with the alicorn strength preservation charms that Celestia had cast upon the palace before leaving most of the structure was in a drastic state of disrepair. There was hardly a single room in the place that didn’t have part of the ceiling caved in or fallen walls littering the floor. Most of the main halls’ support columns were on the verge of keeling over under a slight breeze, and that wasn’t even approaching the sheer level of danger the underground floors held. The whole castle had to be rebuilt practically from the ground up, forcing Twilight to bring in construction crews from as far away as Las Pegasus to enact the repairs.

The process was not helped in the least by the many, many prank traps hidden everywhere within the castle, traps that were somehow still functioning after thousands of years of decay had nearly brought the castle down atop them. Frustrated, Twilight had asked the sister diarchs how to turn off the traps, or at the very least a map of their locations and triggers so the work teams wouldn’t get caught in them every time they so much as touched a cobblestone. To her annoyance and shock Luna and Celestia said that no such map existed, and that the traps had been designed to run at all times, regardless of the situation the castle was in. The point of the traps was to be able to catch the two sisters off guard at any time. Apparently that was supposed to be fun. When Twilight had questioned the sanity of the setup Luna had merely shrugged and said, “We were but foals at the time. Twas our source of entertainment.”

So the construction work went on, delayed several times a day by yet another false wall or stone slide plucking a pony from his place without a hint of warning. The inefficiency of it all drove Twilight up the metaphorical wall every time she got a progress report. The project head, Hard Hat, sometimes joked to Twilight about the place being a hazard posting and asking for extra compensation, somewhere along the lines of one bit per trap tripped. Recognizing the humor for the stress relief that it was Twilight had decided to agree, and by the end of the project she wouldn’t have been surprised if most of the workers had enough bits to go to the university scholarship free if they wanted to.

While the restoration crawled forward at a pace even Tank would roll his eyes at, Twilight had retrained her focus on finding a full-size faculty to fill up her new facility. Finding the maids, cooks, grounds-keepers and other such positions was foal’s play, as most ponies would leap at the chance to serve a princess, even if indirectly. Pinning down qualified professors was a bit tougher, as the very best instructors in most fields were either already working at a school or were completely uninterested in teaching at all. Twilight ended up having to get rather creative with where she found her teachers, hiring directly out of more active professions or even grabbing up new talent that she felt had potential but had yet to prove themselves. On the whole she was happy with her choices, though she did have some concerns about whether some would actually be good teachers in spite of their expertise in their assigned subject.

Next up had been working with her new staff and generating the course work that they would all use when teaching began. It had seemed straightforward at first but soon became complicated as everyone (not everypony, as not all of her teachers were ponies) realized that the classes would be open to anyone, including those who might not be capable of actively participating. Unicorn magic classes might end up being attended by Earth ponies or pegasi. Pegasus cloud management techniques could draw in curious griffons who couldn’t quite mimic everything their fellow flyers were capable of. The extremely subtle but extraordinarily varied magic of Earth ponies was so broad that it could be of interest to almost anyone, Equestrian or not. Beyond that were the many rare species of magic creatures that roamed all across Equestria. Dragons, timberwolves, breezies, even the recently returned crystal ponies and evilly elusive changlings all had their own unique brands of magic worthy of study. Beyond even those were the myriad branches of practical magic used in everyday life and the theoretical areas that were constantly pushing the boundaries of what was possible, each of which deserved its own focus and time to shine.

It was very quickly apparent that each professor was going to be very busy trying to cram everything they wanted their students to learn into each year unless their duties were split up into more specialized roles. Meaning Twilight would have to go on another round of teacher hunting. Oh joy. Thankfully for the slightly irate princess there was another job that was much more up her alley. Time management and scheduling for the courses already agreed upon. Twilight ended up using the scheduling as on the job free time while traveling around finding yet more experts for the new courses.

By the time she was finally done securing nearly every open position the construction crews had completed the remodeling of the castle. The final report of the castle’s progress listed more than three hundred individual traps, pranks, and harmless secret rooms, a figure which seriously bent Twilight’s mind as she tried to grasp just how the original architects had managed to fit them all in there. Aside from those were the half dozen hidden paths in and out of the castle, fifteen hidden rooms carrying powerful magical objects or other dangerous items, a secondary tunnel that led down to the underground hall of the Tree of Harmony, and, perhaps most importantly, the Celestia damn control room to those confounded traps!

The relics were all immediately sent off to Canterlot for resealment by the two diarchs as none of the three alicorns wished to have a repeat of Rarity’s brief creative rampage through Ponyville. The secret paths were hidden again and set under careful watch in case of intrusion by the local beasts of Everfree Forest. The once terrifying place may have calmed down significantly after Discord’s Chaos Seeds were removed from the Tree of Harmony, but it was still a wilderness in many respects and it behooved everyone to treat it that way. As for the control room for the traps Twilight sat herself down in the room as soon as she was aware of it and studied the entire thing for a week to figure out how it all worked.

When she did she was surprised to discover that the whole setup ran on an extremely in depth rune scheme that rivaled those laced throughout Canterlot in complexity and power. Apparently the reason the traps were still functioning after all these years was because they were draining the magic of Celestia’s preservation spells into the runes as their own power faded, causing the slow breakdown of the castle and everything in it. Twilight took the opportunity to gleefully inform her mentor of the happening in person and was rewarded by the one and only time she had seen the alicorn of the sun facehoof in disbelief. The soon to be headmistress had of course shut down the runes immediately upon returning, though with the mental promise to maybe turn them on occasionally for special events, like April Foal’s day or Nightmare Night. It could be a new school tradition! Those were very important in a school’s sense of community.

The next few weeks were a haze of busy work as the final preparations were rushed to completion. Decorating classrooms, gathering supplies, planning clubs and setting up dorm rooms. When she was being honest with herself Twilight didn’t really remember much of those days, her mind having grown heavy with worries about the future and whether she was truly ready for such a huge responsibility. She quickly got over her concerns when she received a round of letters from her friends telling her that they would be visiting for the grand opening. Hay, even Rainbow was coming by, and it was the middle of the Wonderbolt season! Twilight smiled wistfully to herself as she remembered the surge of happiness she’d felt when she’d read the news. She may not have been able to spent time with them much over the last few months, but her friends really were the best anypony could ask for.

Now it was just a few days before the official opening of the school and everypony was dashing around madly trying to complete the last few items on their list. Funnily enough Twilight wasn’t feeling the least bit panicked herself. All she had to do today was meet up with the last of new teachers and see that he was all ready for the school year. To be honest Twilight hadn’t actually met Mr. Chaos Theory in person yet. He had come highly recommended in a letter and his credentials seemed near impeccable. Busy as she had been with her town hopping during the second round of teacher searching she hadn’t had time to go meet him and had sent him a letter instead asking if he would be interested in teaching here.

Thankfully Theory hadn’t taken offense at being invited in a letter and had agreed to come in a rather flowery return letter. If nothing else, Twilight remarked to herself as she turned down another hall, he had quite of way with words. Her cheeks reddened a bit as she recalled some of the stallion’s statements regarding her exploits in the past with her friends. If she didn’t know better she’d had said he was flirting with her, but of course that was ridiculous. Mr. Theory was a good deal older than her according to his resume, sitting somewhere in his middle 30’s versus Twilight only just into her 20’s. The thought of a dignified professor such as him being attracted to her was laughable. That’s what she’d kept telling herself at least.

Okay Twilight, don’t be nervous, she told herself as she approached Chaos Theory’s office. All you’re doing is greeting the new professor. It’s nothing you haven’t done fifteen times before. Or was it twenty? Twenty-five? She shook her head a bit. Getting off topic. Point is you can do this. You’re the Headmistress of the Equestrian Academy of Magic, not to mention the Princess of Friendship and Learning. There’s nothing to be concerned about. Be professional, be inviting. And most of all, do not think about that ‘poise like a graceful swan’ comment.

She reached out and knocked on the door, hearing a confirming ‘come in’ on the other side. There’s nothing to be excited about in that. Nothing at all. Heck, I bet he’s just some harmless dowdy old…

Twilight’s train of thought immediately became violently derailed as she caught sight of the professor turning to greet her. He was a unicorn, sporting a dark brown sweater vest with white collar and sleeves over his lighter earthen brown fur. His mane was primarily gray with occasional stripes of black running in between, lending him an air of aged wisdom and knowledge. His cuite mark was slightly odd; an equals sign with a diagonal slash cutting through it, but it was hard to pay attention to it over the surprisingly toned flank that sported it. A yellow aura appeared around his horn as Theory lowered the chalk he’d been using and pulled his square framed glasses up his muzzle to more properly cover his deeply red eyes.

Twilight could feel her heart skip a few beats while her brain was attempting to clear up the mess that had been caused by her derailed thought train, leaving the poor mare unable to do more than stare blankly at the professor. Only one clear thought could be formed in the temporary chaos of her mind, not that it was at all helping matters.

Oh Celestia save me, he’s hot!

The two academics stared at each other in silence for several moments before Chaos Theory took pity on his visitor and started the conversation. “Headmistress Twilight Sparkle I presume? A delight to meet you.” He held out a friendly hoof of welcome.

Twilight jumped a bit as she remembered her manners and tapped her own hoof against his, saying with a slight stutter as she did, “Er, Li… likewise Mr. Chaos Theory.”

Theory smiled indulgently and withdrew his hoof, bowing his head slightly and continuing, “So, to what do I owe the pleasure of your presence? Come to check upon your latest addition to the faculty most likely. Making sure I know my stuff as it were, correct?”

Twilight’s blush was being remarkably stubborn in refusing to disappear like she wanted it to. “Well, uh, yes, I suppose you could call it that.”

The stallion just laughed lightly at Twilight’s meek expression and said reassuringly, “Oh no worries my dear. I hold no grudge against you making sure your teaching choices are up to the task you’ve set for them. I would expect no less from somepony as dedicated and capable as yourself, your Highness.”

Whelp, looks like Mr. Blush is here to stay. “Th… thank you Mr. Theory,” Twilight said as she did her best to hide her proud smile at his compliment. “Really, though, it’s wonderful to have you here at the Academy, professor. ‘Physics of Magic’ is easily one of the most complicated subjects in magical academia. I’m so relieved to have found a quality instructor willing to teach it.” She hoped that didn’t sound too much like the gushing she suspected it was.

“Tish tosh, my dear,” Chaos said as he waved away her words good-naturedly. “It is I who should be thanking you. It’s an honor to be allowed to teach here.” Theory turned and pointed to the room around them, his voice taking on a respectful tone projecting a sense of awe. “Just look at where we stand. The Castle of the Two Sisters! Once a place where all of Equestria looked for guidance, history has cast a long, ugly shadow upon this place. Other ponies – saner ponies – would have stayed away. But not you. Oh no. You, my dear, turned this supposedly haunted mausoleum of the past into a school. A school of magic open to earth ponies, unicorns, and pegasi alike.” A sly smile appeared on his lips as he turned back to Twilight. “Everypony is saying you’re crazier than a bag of cats for trying something so ambitious.”

Twilight faced away and glared at the floor, all too aware of the numerous critics she had garnered as news of her grand project had spread. Celestia had urged her to ignore the naysayers and push on with her idea, but their constant stream of complaints had been a stinging annoyance in Twilight’s side during the whole project. Hearing them mentioned by one of her own staff was rather galling. On the plus side at least my face doesn’t look like a volcano anymore.

“But who cares what those fools say, hmm? They clearly don’t understand what you are trying to do.”

Twilight looked back at the professor in surprise, unsure if she had heard him correctly.

“Those critics call you crazy as if that were an indictment, an insult to your character. But I say you’re crazy like a fox. You have defied traditional convention to create stunning innovation. Embraced chaos to bring about positive growth.” The stallion’s smile grew slimmer and more sincere with each word spoken. “Consider me a fan.”

Aaaaand Mr. Blush is back again. “I, well, thank you professor. But I can’t take all the credit! It was Princess Celestia who suggested founding a new school of magic to me, not to mention providing me with all the funding I needed to get everything done.” She turned away as she began to speak faster and faster, falling into her usual trap of pacing back and forth when she got excited. “I mean I’ve always supported opening the magical arts to non-unicorns, magic is inherent in all ponies after all. Even griffons and zebras have their own magic that they can use, so why shouldn’t they have a chance to learn alongside everypony else?”

Unnoticed by Twilight a faint pink gas began to flow into the room, circling around Professor Chaos Theory as his smile grew positively wicked.

“So with a few major repairs here, a few dozen weather control charms there, it became perfectly easy to… embrace… chaos.” Twilight’s eyes widened in sudden realization as the gas behind her began to flow faster and faster, creating an artificial windstorm in the classroom. Twilight’s voice hardened into steel as she glanced over her shoulder and said, “I bet you think this is funny, Discord.”

The cloud quickly fully engulfed the professor in its pink embrace before a sound like a thunderclap struck from within. A deep, melodious voice spoke from within the fading mist, speaking in a mocking tone, “Actually dear Headmistress…” A clawed eagle arm swept the mist away, leaving Twilight a plain view of the trickster chimera within. “I thought it was hilarious.”

Twilight glared up at the frightening visage without fear, her wings stretched horizontally to her sides in pent up anger. Then, just as suddenly as the monster appeared the image was broken as the creature flopped to the floor bonelessly and rattled back and forth with gut-wrenching guffaws. “You, ha ha, you should have seen the look on your face. Oh it was priceless. Ha ha ha HA!”

Resisting the urge to let her eye twitch in annoyance Twilight all but roared at Discord, saying, “This isn’t funny! Do you know how much time and effort I put into finding all of the teachers I need for all the courses! School is supposed to start NEXT WEEK and now I’m missing a professor for one of the most important classes!”

Discord paused in his laughter for a moment to stare up at the incensed princess glaring down at him. “Oh but my dearest Twilight, who said anything about you missing a teacher? After all…” he snapped his fingers and with a loud poof Chaos Theory once again stood before her, smiling gamely at her. “I’m still right here.”

Save for a slightly lifted eyebrow showing her skepticism Twilight’s glare did not change a wit. “Do you really think I would trust you with a teaching position at my school? Especially after abusing my trust like this right before the school year starts?”

“Oh come now your Highness,” Discord-as-Chaos-Theory said mockingly. “Do you truly imagine that I would betray the oh-so-sacred trust of one of my dearest friends by ruining her first day as headmistress just for the sake of a few laughs?”

Twilight’s response would have made the bluntest of brick walls wish to be painted green with envy. “Yes.”

Theory’s face drooped a bit as Twilight’s words registered in his mind. “Ah. I see. Well perhaps that is my fault,” he said with defeated grace as he flowed back into his normal form. “I have been a bit overzealous lately haven’t I?”

“That’s one way of putting it,” Twilight muttered angrily. After the defeat of Tirek several years ago Equestria had been at relative peace ever since, though Twilight and her friends were occasionally forced into their own adventures every so often. Aside from those romps though Ponyville had been surprisingly quiet. Too quiet for a chaos entity like Discord, prompting the draconequis to create his own fun, much to the detriment of the town’s denizens. For the most part his pranks were fairly harmless, more embarrassing than dangerous, but over time the ponies began to get fed up with being constantly bothered by the big pest. Fluttershy had mentioned in her letters that she had tried to get Discord to lay off on his jokes for a while and failed. Weirdly enough she said that he hadn’t seemed malicious in his joking but rather just seemed melancholy and quiet, as if his pranking was an attempt to ignore whatever it was that was on his mind. Whatever it was, Twilight was in no mood to have that disruptive influence at her school.

Discord sighed melodramatically before saying, “I suppose I have been something of an annoyance for everypony recently.” The draconequis perked up in an instant and said proudly, “But that changes today.”

Twilight blinked at Discord in confusion. “What.”

Discord continued on with his pronouncement and ignored the bamboozled Twilight. “I’ve been pranking and joking away constantly for these last few months, and as fun as that has been to lighten up the boring mood that’s been bothering me for so long it’s also done something completely and utterly unacceptable. It’s made me predictable!”

Twilight tilted her head at the draconequis, trying to understand the twisted logic that led him to that conclusion.

“I’ve decided it’s time to change my image. Everypony knows me as little more than a trickster.” A snap of his fingers dressed Discord up in a garish clown’s outfit while three juggling balls were tossed up and down by his horns poking out of his ruffled polka dot hat. “Don’t get me wrong, I love my job, but it’s just gotten boring lately doing the same pranks over and over.” His horns dropped allow with his voice, allowing the three balls to fall down on Twilight’s head in sequence. Thankfully the balls were light enough that Twilight barely even felt them, but it was still a bit insulting.

“So, I figure, why not do something different for a change?” Another snap later and Theory was once again standing in front of her, the three balls hovering in a circle in his telekinetic grasp. “Why not be responsible for once?” He gathered the balls to together and lifted them over to Twilight, a hopeful grin on his face. “Why not be someone you could trust?”

Twilight’s glare faded and her eyebrows flew up in surprise at Discord’s words. Discord, the nigh-omnipotent spirit of chaos and disharmony, wanting to be a teacher? What’s next, Princess Celestia outlawing cake and declaring it a spawn of evil? And yet, despite her initial instinct to dismiss Discord and declare that he was joking once again, something within her said that he was telling the truth. Maybe… maybe I should give him a chance. She sighed, losing her anger alongside her breath. “You’re really serious about this? You’ll behave yourself and be a proper teacher?”

Discord stilled for a moment before dropping to the floor and giving a proper bow. “I give you my word Princess.”

Twilight may have been a trusting friend and have a soft spot for those who tried to make up for their mistakes, but she was nobody’s fool. She wanted to be absolutely sure Discord wouldn’t try something, so she went for the weapon of ultimate trust of any friendship. “Pinkie Promise it.”

“Pardon?” Discord asked, taking off one of his ears and rubbing it clear of dust.

Twilight stood up and adopted the regal posture that Cadance had been teaching her before slowly stating, “I want you to Pinkie Promise that you will not act in an undue fashion while teaching or cause trouble while you work here. You do that, then I will let you teach.”

“Oh very well,” Discord said dismissively. “Cross my heart, hope to die. Stick a cupcake in my eye.” He then withdrew a cupcake from behind his back and stuck it in his eye socket, forcing the eyeball to come flying out of his still removed earhole. “Happy?”

“I’m satisfied,” Twilight said. “Happy would be overstating things. Let’s make one thing clear Discord. The only reason I’m accepting this is because I really, really don’t want to have to go through the effort of finding a replacement teacher just a few days before the school year starts. That said, if you show any hint of disgracing this institution or doing something that harms or otherwise upsets one of my students I will not hesitate gather the other Elements and turn you back to stone again with the Rainbow magic. Do I make myself clear?”

Discord blanched slightly under Twilight’s death glare, twiddling his fingers nervously at the thought of being returned to stone. “Ah, yes. I understand perfectly your Highness.”

Twilight allowed her glare to fall away and smiled brightly at her new, and perfectly harmless, professor. “Perfect. I’ll want your class schedule on my desk by tomorrow evening at the latest. It doesn’t have to be rigid but you should at least outline what areas you will cover and when you will cover them, okay? Great.” She trotted over to the door, pretending to be perfectly nonchalant about leaving the chaos being alone. Just before she left she turned around and said, “Oh, and I’d prefer it if nopony knew that it was you teaching them so you’re going to have to stay as Chaos Theory while teaching. And that means no crazy chaos magic while class is in session.”

Discord’s jaw dropped all the way to the floor as he very suddenly realized just how crippled he would really be. He pulled on his still attached ear to bring his jaw up off the ground to stutter, “But… but…”

Twilight didn’t give him a chance to continue as she smiled brightly and said with a cheerful air of finality, “Have a nice day, Mr. Chaos Theory. I hope you enjoy working here at my school.” And with that she exited the room, swishing her tail in triumph as Discord couldn’t do anything but stand there bewildered. Looks like this year is going to be more interesting than I thought. Twilight grimaced to herself out in the hall. Now here’s hoping my sanity can survive.

Author's Note

Proper Author's Notes pending. Will be updated upon request. Enjoy!

Chapter 3

Embracing Chaos Chapter 3

“You quit the Wonderbolts!?” The purple alicorn’s scream rang out through the throne room louder than the Ponyville bell tower being rung by an especially enthusiastic Pinkie Pie.

Taking a moment to rub her ears with her feathers Dash rolled her eyes at Twilight and said sarcastically, “Uh, yeah Twi. I literally just said that.”

“I… But… WHY?” Twilight stammered uncomprehendingly. “Why would you quit the Wonderbolts?” She started pacing back and forth as she went on, her wings twitching erratically as she walked. “It’s been your dream to fly with them since before the day I met you! What could possibly cause you to give up on that after you finally made it in? It just makes no sense. I mean I know flying back and forth across Equestria without a break isn’t easy — by Luna’s shining stars do I know it ain’t easy — but that can’t have been enough to force you to quit. But what else could it be? Were the stunts not impressive enough for you? Were the crowds not respectful enough? I just don’t understa—”

Twilight snapped out of her rant as she felt one of Rainbow’s wings lightly smack her across the back of her head. She turned around to see Rainbow bearing a frustrated look as she said, “If you would just sit still and listen for a second Twilight maybe I could explain!”

Twilight could feel her checks reddening a bit. “Eh heh, sorry Rainbow.” She dragged over two of the chairs her friends had been previously using and clambering onto it. “I’ll just sit here and listen quietly.”

Rainbow looked skeptically back at Twilight as she fluttered up into her own chair. “Wonder how long that will last?” she muttered near silently to herself as she settled in. “All right. ‘Splaining time.” Rainbow blew out a breath and rolled her hooves through her mane as she tried to figure out where to start. “So you remember what I was like when we first met? How braggy and boasty I was and how I didn’t care about anything other than the Wonderbolts?”

Twilight nodded and said, “You were just a little bit obsessed with them back then.”

Rainbow looked back with an eyebrow raised and asked, “That’s an understatement if I ever heard one Twilight. Before I met you girls the Wonderbolts were the only thing I thought about. Everything else was just a distraction. Job, friends, anything that wasn’t practicing my stunts was a waste of time and not worth the effort.”

Twilight winced at the harsh appraisal her friend had of herself. “You weren’t that bad Dash. I mean you would never have become the Element of Loyalty if you didn’t care about other ponies.”

“Yeah I guess so,” Rainbow said with a slight smile. “But I was still pretty obnoxious.” She paused as she turned to Twilight and asked, “That was the right word, right?”

“Yes, that’s correct,” Twilight said while giggling. It had been so long since she had seen Rainbow that she had almost forgotten about her friend’s efforts to improve her vocabulary. As Dash’s obsession with the Daring Do series grew she had been faced with the dilemma of repeatedly running into words she was unfamiliar with. Her solution to that problem had been to constantly badger Twilight into telling her what they meant, to the point where even the studious alicorn became a bit upset. Twilight had eventually all but forced Dash to start reading a thesaurus, an effort that Dash had taken to surprisingly well. Ever since then it had become a bit of a running joke between them, one that brought Twilight no end of amusement. “Some might say you’re still a bit obnoxious. In a charming way,” she added snidely.

“Yeah, ha ha,” Rainbow responded while poking Twilight in the stomach. “And you’ve been gaining weight. Are you still going out to fly every day like I told you before I left?”

Now it was Twilight’s turn to be embarrassed. “Of course I am,” she said as with as much certainty as she could muster. Dash didn’t appear to be the least bit fooled, one of her eyebrows raised questioningly. Twilight’s eyes shifted back and forth as she clarified, “Well most of the time.”

“Oh really?” Rainbow asked suspiciously. “Ok then.” She leaned in close and stared Twilight down, asking, “When was your last flight?”

Twilight cringed under the gaze, confidence slowly faltering. “Uuhh…”

“Weeell?”

Twilight Sparkle, Princess of Magic and defeater of such terrifying threats as the unreformed Discord and the monstrous Tirek, finally quailed under the glare of one of her best friends. “Two… two weeks ago.”

Rainbow rolled her eyes as she retreated to her chair. “Why am I not surprised? Figures becoming the head egghead would make you completely forget about physical stuff.”

Twilight pursed her lips before saying, “Weren’t we talking about why you quit the Wonderbolts?”

Rainbow’s face immediately fell, causing Twilight to regret her wording just a bit. “Yeah. That. Well just imagine this. Imagine me without any of the nice stuff that makes me your friend, focused purely on training and willing to do anything to win, even if it hurts other ponies. Now imagine an entire team made up of nothing but that!”

Twilight gaped at Rainbow in openmouthed disbelief. “All… all of them?”

“Yep,” Rainbow answered monotonously. “Remember that one recruit back in Wonderbolts training I told you about, Lightning… something or other? Turns out she would have fit in with the Wonderbolts way better than I did.”

“But she was the one who was almost let us all DIE just to complete some stupid stunt!” Twilight objected instantly.

“And the one who almost made me quit the Wonderbolts before I was even really a member.” Rainbow’s face became melancholy as she continued, saying, “Maybe it would have been better if I had quit then, not wasted some much time.”

Twilight winced, immediately trying to find some way to lighten her friend’s mood. “Well, what about Spitfire, the team captain? She seemed to be pretty nice when I met her several years ago for that waterspout endeavor. And Soarin was really courteous to Applejack when she was selling deserts at our first Gala.”

Rainbow reluctantly nodded. “Yeah Spits is alright for the most part, kinda stern sometimes but that’s just a part of her job, ya know? And Soarin is totally chill about everything, in it for the fun and the fans. Even if he does tend to fly into stuff when the fanfillies are cheering for him,” Dash said a chuckle. “The big dufus.”

“See,” Twilight pointed out. “At least some of the Wonderbolts are friendly.”

“Two ponies can’t make up for everything, Twilight,” Rainbow said sternly. “Especially not with how the rest of them act. They’re always arguing with each other about how they are obviously the best and that they’re stuck carrying the whole team on their backs. None of them are friends with each other. Heck, I’m surprised they can even stand being in the same room for more than a few seconds.”

With a single pair of wing beats Rainbow lifted off her chair and started fluttering back and forth in her rant. “Whenever Applejack and I had our competitions we were always doing them as friends, just teasing and joking with each other for a few laughs. In the time I’ve been on the team five fights have broken out. Five! And these weren’t just disagreements or nothing; these were full on brawls. If you had been there you’d swear those idiots were trying to kill each other.”

“But that’s not the worst part. The worst part is that they somehow have Spits completely fooled about the whole thing. Every time shows up during one of their ‘arguments’,” she paused in back and forth movement to flutter her wings in an air quotes motion, “they’ll just stop whatever they’re doing and pretend nothing was happening. They know Spitfire will suspend them if they get caught so whenever she’s around they’re all on their best behavior, but as soon as she’s gone then Bam! They’re right back at it again.”

Twilight’s frown had been growing more and more pronounced as Rainbow’s story went on. “Have you tried reporting these fights to Spitfire directly?”

Her anger spent Dash slowly settled back down into her chair, saying, “What am I supposed to do, report the entire squad? There wouldn’t be a team left if every jerk was put on the sidelines. Besides, once I saw the first fight and objected the rest of them told me to keep it to myself or else.”

Twilight’s hoof flew up to her muzzle to suppress a gasp. “They actually threatened you? They didn’t try to hurt you did they?”

“Don’t worry about it Twi,” Dash said calmly. “After facing down manticores, changelings, and bugbears it’ll take a lot more than a room full of arrogant pegasi to take me on.”

“Well then what was stopping you from reporting them?” Twilight asked.

Sadness returned to Rainbow’s face for her answer. “I wasn’t scared that they’d hurt me so much as they’d do something to get me kicked out. I… I was still so new to team. I didn’t want to take any risks.”

Twilight nodded understandingly, then softly flew over to her friend’s side and drew Dash into a comforting hug. “I understand Rainbow. Being a Wonderbolt was your dream and you didn’t want to lose it. That’s nothing to be ashamed of.”

Rainbow quickly returned the hug, saying, “Thanks Twilight. I figured you’d understand.”

With a final pat on the shoulder Twilight smiled at her friend and retreated back to her chair before signaling Rainbow to continue.

“Anyway, after that first fight I tried to ignore the others’ hostilities and just focus on being a part of the team. Spreading the magic of friendship and all that stuff you’re always blabbing about.” Rainbow waggled her eyebrows at Twilight and only got an eye roll in return. “And at first I thought it was working. The team wasn’t fighting as much and I made a few friends with the other newbies. But that changed very quickly the second I made the mistake of trying to move up in the ranks.”

Twilight’s brow furrowed as she prepared herself for the worst. “What happened?”

Rainbow gave a heavy sigh and fell back against her chair. “It was our third show of the season up in Las Pegasus in the cloud stadium they have there. It’s pretty cool, but the one up in Cloudsdale is better. Anyway, the team had just started practice when Spits noticed that one of the flight leads, Barrel Roll, was missing. We spent about an hour looking for him but he was nowhere to be found so Spits had to start looking for a replacement. Soarin suggested me before any of the others could volunteer, and Spits decided to give me a chance at some leadership.”

“Were you nervous?” Twilight asked with a curious smile.

“Me? Nervous?” Rainbow loudly scoffed. “Just who the hay do you think you’re talking to? I’m never nervous. So what that this would be my first time leading a difficult routine in front of crowd of thousands of ponies? It was no big deal.”

Twilight merely smirked at her friend’s bravado and replied, “So you were nervous.”

Rainbow pretended to be offended a little longer then let it go with a cheeky grin. “Eh, just a little bit. It would be tough but I knew I could handle it. Spits wouldn’t have given me the job if I couldn’t.”

“No she wouldn’t,” Twilight agreed. “So how did the show go? Did the team give you any problems?”

“Nope,” Rainbow said proudly. “Whole thing went off without a hitch. I lead the team through the whole routine no problem, and the crowd just ate it up. Spits was so impressed she said she would think about having me bumped up to flight lead pretty soon. It was one of the best days of my life.” Her smile faded a bit as the she continued. “Somehow part of me knew it wouldn’t last.”

Twilight frowned, the weight of her friend’s mood dragging her down with it. “Rainbow…”

Dash shook her head to clear out the morose thoughts and continue the story. “So right there, right at the highlight of my day who should show up but that featherhead Barrel Roll. Guess what happened to him? That moron spent the whole night before at some party and got so drunk he completely forgot we were heading out the next day. He didn’t even wake up until noon! Feathering noon! And as soon as he gets to the stadium he has the gall to start yelling at me for taking his position. The position he was totally absent from to begin with!”

Twilight pursed her lips in distaste. “Either he is really stupid or really arrogant to not see the hypocrisy there.”

“It’s both, trust me on that one.” Rainbow grew a bit of a smile on her face as she spoke the next bit. “But it was mostly stupid at the time cause he made the mistake of shouting at me while Spits was nearby. As soon as she knew it was him she rushed over and really tore him a new one for what he did. I haven’t seen a pony cowering that badly since that time Lyra broke a Pinkie Promise. Dereliction of duty, disgracing the team, she really let him have it. And this was all in public by the way. By the end he was shaking in his suit and Spits decided to suspend him for the rest of the season.”

Twilight tilted her head in confusion as she said, “Well that doesn’t sound so bad. Sure he was a jerk but he got what he deserved in the end and you proved yourself as a capable leader.”

“Yeah I know. Sounds awesome right? That’s what I thought at the time. What I didn’t realize was that everypony else on the team was there as well, and some of the older guys didn’t like what was happening.” Rainbow’s face became downcast as she narrated the events that followed. “That night Spits and Soarin took me out to this really cool restaurant to celebrate the day, and while we were gone the older team members, the ones who were causing trouble all the time, started spreading around a whole bunch of lies to my friends. They said stuff like ‘she’s only moving up cause she’s friends with the Cap’, and ‘she tricked Barrel into being late so she could take his place.’ Stuff like that.”

Twilight felt the beginnings of tears in her eyes. “Oh Rainbow…”

“By the time we got back the damage had been done. All the work I’d done to try and make friends was totally wrecked. None of them would do so much as look at me if Spits wasn’t around, and every time she did something to recognize my achievements they just got worse. It didn’t matter what I did after that. All they could see me as was this over-ambitious filly with friends in high places. It… it got really hard to enjoy the flying when the guys I’m flying with couldn’t stand to be around me.”

“Rainbow, that’s…” Twilight paused to cover up some crying sniffs, “that’s horrible.”

“Yeah,” Rainbow agreed despondedly. “It was pretty rough. But you wanna know the worst part? The whole time this was going on I was still getting letters from you girls about what you all were up to. Fluttershy’s vet clinic expanding, Rarity opening another shop in Canterlot, Applejack still working the farm, you and your whole school thing, and Pinkie Pie’s… whatever she was doing. Each time I got a letter it felt like I was getting a glimpse of the life I’d left behind. Of what I was missing. You girls are my best friends in the whole world, ponies I’d traveled across Equestria with and saved the planet with multiple times. And this was what I gave being with you for? Hanging around with a bunch of flankholes who hated me for something I wasn’t? That royally sucked.”

Twilight had to fight the urge to rush forward and hug her friend again, refraining and saying instead, “We missed you too Rainbow. Every day you were gone.” She paused as Rainbow smiled back at her and gave a grateful nod. “So what made you finally decide to quit?”

Rainbow blew out a puff of air, trying to send all of her negative thoughts and memories off with it. “It was last week, when I got your letter about your school’s grand opening. I’d already been tossing the idea around for a while so when I saw your invitation I was like, ‘Ya know what? Buck this! If these guys don’t want me around then fine. I’m gonna go and support the dream of one of my real friends, cause that what friends are supposed to do.’ And I’ll never leave one of my friends hanging. No matter what.”

Now Twilight didn’t bother to hold back the tears as she again moved forward and caught her friend in a massive hug. “And you never have. Thanks for being here Rainbow, and I’m sorry you had to go through all that.”

“That’s okay Twi,” Rainbow said as she returned the hug unreservedly. “It wasn’t your fault the Wonderbolts aren’t all they’re cracked up to be. It was just a lifelong obsession/dream. I’m sure I’ll get over it.”

“And we’ll be here to help you do that,” Twilight assured. “All of us.” The two friends held each other close for a while, just enjoying being together again after so many months apart. “So,” Twilight finally said after the two broke apart at last, “you were asking about a teaching position?”

Rainbow nodded and rubbed the back of her head with slight embarrassment. “Yeah, I was. I figured since I was heading this way anyway I’d see if I could get a job here. I mean, I could always go back to being weather manager in Ponyville, but I think I should try doing something else for a while. Broaden my horizons and whatnot.”

Twilight smiled brightly and said, “That sounds like a wonderful idea Rainbow. Learning and doing new things is never a bad idea, and I’m sure you will be an excellent teacher.”

“How do you figure that Twi?” Rainbow asked with a skeptical look on her face.

“Oh don’t act surprised Dash,” Twilight responded confidently. “I’ve seen you be a great leader to foals and adults alike. Coaching the CMC on their routine for the Equestrian Games, taking charge of Ponyville’s competitors for the games and for the waterspout creation. You have quite the skill with holding ponies’ attentions and encouraging them to do their best, two of the most important characteristics of a good teacher. Actually teaching the material should be a piece of cake after that.”

Rainbow looked thoughtful at the observation, tapping her hoof to her muzzle for a moment before a gentle smile appeared on her face. “Yeah, heh, I guess you’re right. Never really thought about it like that before. So what kind of teaching would I be doing?”

Twilight warped over to her desk and started shuffling through some papers while saying, “To be honest Rainbow you could take over the positions of most of the pegasi classes in you wanted to. Basic and advanced flight instruction, cloud management and creation, physical training. You’ve got so many different talents it would be hard to pick just one for you to teach.”

Rainbow grinned and shined her hoof on her chest proudly. “Yeah, I guess I’m pretty awesome like that. Oh hey could you make sure I have some spare time after school so I can coach the hoofball team? That’d be, like, twice the level of awesome.”

Behind her mound of papers Twilight suddenly froze in place, her eyes fixedly gazing off blankly into the walls. “Hoofball team?” she parroted in a hushed whisper.

“Yeah, the hoofball team,” Rainbow confirmed as she hovered over to Twilight. “Every really big school has one, Twi, even an egghead like you should know that.” She then caught the strained smile Twilight had on her face and put two and two together in her head. “You do have a hoofball team right?”

A shake of Twilight’s head was her answer.

“A physical education class?” Rainbow said in a worried tone.

Another no.

“Do you even have a sports department at all!?”

Twilight’s left eye twitched heavily as she said, “Opps?”

“OPPS!” Dash cried out angrily. “How do you ‘opps’ an entire part of a school’s curriculum?! EVERY school has a sports department Sparkle! Every! Single! One! How in the feathering hay could you forget that?!”

“It never came up,” Twilight said in an attempt at an excuse. “I was so focused on the classroom education it just never occurred to me. And to be fair nopony else remembered it either!”

Rainbow groaned and smacked her head down onto Twilight’s desk; ironically enough in the same spot Twilight had been doing so earlier. “I can’t believe this. Like, I seriously am having trouble understanding this at all right now.”

“Don’t worry Rainbow, we can still fix this!” Twilight said desperately as she started clearing her desk and grabbing up blank sheets for notes. “We still have some time before the school year starts. I’ll just have to stay up for the next few nights getting teachers and funding and everything and it’ll be fine! NO NEED TO WORRY!” Small strands of Twilight’s mane started to poke up as her twitching accelerated.

Dash pulled back a bit in concern as she recognized the onset of a panic attack in her friend. “Whoa there Twilight, calm down. You’re already super busy with all this other school stuff. You should have someone else manage all the sports stuff so you don’t, you know, go crazy or anything.”

Twilight paused, taking several long and measured breathes while using her magic to straighten out her mane. “You’re right Rainbow. There’s too much on my plate already for me to be able to focus on a development this big. Delegation would be for the best.” Twilight paused in thought before gaining a delighted grin. “And that’s why I’m making you head of the sports department.”

Dash let out a sigh of relief and said, “Glad to see you’re seeing reason and not letting yourself freak out again. So what sort of pony are you look… Wait, you want ME to do all of that?!”

“You’re the most applicable pony I have available at short notice,” Twilight explained rationally. “You know sports the best out of anypony I know and have contacts with all sorts of groups because of your time with the Wonderbolts. I’m sure you can manage this no problem. Plus you have lots of management experience being the Ponyville weather manager. You’re perfect for the job.”

Dash looked at her friend with a mix of surprise and awe. “You… you really think that I can do all of this for you? You’d trust me with it?”

Twilight simply nodded and said, “Yes Rainbow. I know you are more than capable of do this. There’s nopony I’d rather trust with this right now.”

Rainbow smiled gratefully at Twilight, rubbing her eyes to clear out the ~~tears~~ DIRT that was in them. “Th… thanks Twilight. That means a lot to me.”

Twilight sat back and let Rainbow have her sensitive moment, quietly shuffling her desk back into order while she waited.

Finally Rainbow got a hold of herself and announced, “Don’t worry, Twi. By the time I’m done this place will have the best dang sports department in all of Equestria, guaranteed.” She paused as a loud grumbling echoed from her stomach. “After I get some lunch. Can’t keep on being awesome on an empty stomach. Wanna come with me Twi?”

Twilight giggled but shook her head. “Sorry Rainbow but not just yet. I still have a little bit more paperwork to do. I’ll be down in a few minutes.”

Rainbow stuck out her tongue and gagged. “Ugh, paperwork. The worse part of any job ever. Good luck with that. See you in a bit.”

“Bye Dash. I’ll be done soon.” With that the pegasus waved to her friend and flew out the door, remembering courtesy enough to shut the door behind her. Twilight settled back down at her desk, sighing contentedly as she sat down. She bore a wide smile on her face, her chest still warmed from seeing her friends again after so long. She was just about to get back to work on looking over her schedules when she felt a light prickling down the back of her neck.

She was being watched. Something else was in the room with her.

Rather than give any visual indication of her realization Twilight took another calming breath and lifted up her pen in her magic before setting to work signing and marking the various papers on her desk. While she worked she subtly started scanning the room around her, using her lifting of the pen to disguise the spell. Doing both activities at the same time was difficult, but Twilight wasn’t Celestia’s star pupil for nothing. Unfortunately the throne room’s cavernous size made the scan take longer than she would have wanted. She had already finished the last of her paperwork and had to resort to looking over her older papers by the time she finally located the intruder, and when she sensed who it was she had to resist the urge to smash her head against the desk again. “Enjoying yourself up there Discord?”

A sudden and explosively loud pop sounded in front of Twilight’s desk, the draconeques appearing with guffawing laughter and leftover bits of popcorn kernels sticking to his fur. “Oh immensely, my dear Twilight. Truly, few things can be as engaging as watching the events that transpire around you.”

Twilight narrowed her eyes at Discord. “I don’t really recall giving you permission to pop into my office and listen in on my conversations.”

Discord recoiled, bending his snake-like body into a loop before unwinding with a whoosh. “Oh Twilight, you wound me. To think that you would suspect me of such a heinous act as that, after all we’ve been through together.”

Twilight rolled her eyes and asked plainly, “Fine then. If you weren’t listening in on my talk with my friends then what exactly were you doing hiding up in the rafters?”

“Oh that’s quite simple really,” Discord said as he poofed some roof tiles into his paws. “I was eavesdropping.” He left the tiles fall out of his hands to float feather-like down to the floor.

Given that her forehead was still shining red from the last few hours of abused she’d heaped upon it Twilight opted to not smack her desk with her face again. Instead she merely closed her eyes and counted to ten, willing herself to think of anything other than her urge to blast Discord with a tickle spell and leave it on for a few days. “Well then, while you were listening… Sorry, eavesdropping, did you happen to hear what Rainbow said her teammates did to her?”

“Indeed I did,” Discord said, his voice tinged with a hint of menace Twilight had not heard since his first release. “And speaking of which, would you, my dearest headmaster, be willing to let me take a short vacation before school starts? I have a few things to take care of around Equestria. Throw a few parties, sell more of my merchandise, take out the trash, things like that.”

Twilight sighed. “I’m sorry Discord, but as tempting as the offer is I can’t let you do that. The actions of the Wonderbolts are quite frankly disgusting and entirely unprofessional, but regardless of that they are still representatives of Equestria and having them be turned into piles of garbage and thrown into the dump would reflect badly on the country as a whole. So for now I must ask you to hold off on your pranking revenge.”

Discord folded his arms over his chest and grumbled, even forming an extra pair of arms to show his full level of annoyance. “Very well Princess Sparkle. I shall refrain from enacting my personal brand of chaotic justice. I am not surprised you would be so reluctant to… wait did you say ‘for now’?”

“I did,” Twilight answered. “While you assaulting the Wonderbolt team members is unacceptable, I am perfectly capable of striking back at them in the way that hurts them most. I may not have any physical evidence of wrongdoing, but Rainbow’s testimony is more than enough to instigate a full investigation into the team and their activities, which if there is any truth to Rainbow’s story will mean we can bring the whole group down.” She grew an almost predatory smile as she said, “And once they are no longer members of the Wonderbolts…”

Discord, Spirit of Chaos and absolute master of improvisation, could not do anything other than gape at Twilight in shock. Eventually he managed to find some words, saying, “My, my, this is a surprise. Twilight Sparkle, Princess of Friendship and leader of the Elements of Harmony asking me, Discord, to work my magic on some of her precious ponies? What is Equestria coming to?” Discord paused in his grandstanding and turned to look more seriously at Twilight. “Are you certain you wish to trust me with this Twilight? I recall you were having some serious doubts about my trustworthiness with simply being a teacher.”

“Yes, I’m sure you had a great view of my ‘uncertainty’ up on the ceiling,” Twilight snarked while applying a light pain removal spell to her forehead now that she was thinking about it. “But no doubt you also heard my friends saying that I should give you a chance to prove your trustworthiness. Consider this another part of such a chance.” Her face became stoney and harsh as she said, “No one harms my friends in such a way and gets away with it for free.”

Discord’s smirk grew proud and evil as he said, “On that, my dear, you and I are in complete agreement.”

“I do have some rules for you though,” Twilight announced. “Be entirely certain that the ones you target were the ones causing the issues in the first place. There will be no permanent or debilitating injuries for any of them, regardless of how far they went. And absolutely no mind altering. My friends’ tales of that are horrible enough to listen to. I wouldn’t wish that sort of treatment on anypony, not even one like Sombra.”

Discord nodded, his tail taking notes on the back of his head as he listened. “Fair enough, Sparkle. You do realize this still leaves me a lot of leeway to have my fun?”

“Well aware,” she answered plainly. “Just because I don’t want them hurt doesn’t mean I don’t want them to suffer. Just not more than they deserve.” Twilight smiled and said, “Anyway, now that that is settled do you have your class schedule on you?”

Discord smirked and snapped his fingers, a small box appearing in front of Twilight.

She looked down at the box skeptically. “A box? How does this have your schedule in it?”

“Flashcards,” Discord answered happily. “And don’t worry Miss Sparkle, they are indeed in the correct order.”

Twilight blinked at the box, having a bit of doubt about the idea of Discord being orderly but shrugged and accepted the box. “Perfect,” she said cheerfully. “That’s one less thing to worry about then. Thank you Discord.” She paused and mulled her words over for a moment. “For some reason it feels really strange to say that.”

“Oh I quite agree,” Discord said with an amused look. “It is just as odd for me to hear, but pleasant all the same. If that is all, I shall be off to wreak some glorious little havoc.”

“Hold on a moment Discord. I have a question.”

Discord obligingly stopped in place, holding on to a bar hanging above him as he stood by.

“What exactly did Pinkie do to you for breaking the Pinkie Promise?”

Discord froze in place. Literally, as chunks of frost formed over his fur and his limbs were covered in blocks of ice. Twilight rolled her eyes and lit up a heat spell, her magenta aura surrounding Discord and quickly melting the ice away.

Even after he was freed though he was still shivering, and it seemed to have little to do with his low temperature trip. “There are many things mortal beings should never have to witness in their lifetimes; things that would scar the mind forever and drive most insane. Tis rare indeed for an immortal like myself to afflicted in such a way. For your own sake, please, do not ask me this question again. And pray to your mentor that you never do something to invoke the pink one’s ire in a similar way.” He shivered again before popping out of the room without another word.

Twilight stared wide eyed at the space Discord had just occupied, her mind running in circles to try and puzzle just what Pinkie could have done to scare Discord of all beings so terribly. Well, if nothing else I could just sic Pinkie on the Wonderbolts and call it a day if I wanted. Nah, that’s probably a bit too cruel now that I think about it. She shrugged her shoulders and reached over to the box Discord had given her and started to open it. She stopped though as she remembered just who had given her the box. Opting to take a few precautions she hovered the box off in front of her desk and opened it there. Thankfully nothing exploded or burst out of the box to spook her so she levitated it back into her hooves and withdrew the first card.

The card was made of bright purple paper and had the words written in barely legible chalky white ink. “Introduction to concepts,” Twilight read aloud as best she could. “Talk about types of magic and general theory. Heavily imply Chaos Theory is more than he seems. Troll Twilight when she watches class.” She glared off in the distance, knowing that somewhere Discord was laughing his tail off.

Sighing Twilight set the card down and picked up the next one, noticing that it was cyan this time with rainbow colored crayon lettering. Looking down at the box Twilight realized that every card was unique from the others and that the legibility went up and up the further in the box she went. Bemused but slightly pleased she put the cards back in the box and made her way out of the office and off to lunch, thinking to herself, Sometimes chaos can be colorful and fun. Who’d have thought?

Author's Note

Okay I have to write this quick since I'm going off to work in a few minutes but here goes. Sorry again that this took so long. Restarting college, getting a new computer and losing that new computer within a few weeks of each other added a whole bunch of delays to the production time. That said, once I get my replacement things such go a bit more quickly in the future. Til then, I hope you enjoy what's here for now. Happy September everyone!