Therapy with Twilight Sparkle

Twilight soared through the evening sky. She was still a bit nervous about the upcoming debriefing with Princess Celestia, but she was not shaking in fear like she would before.

Landing on the balcony once again, she prepared to walk into the chambers. She promptly collided with a large dark figure. Princess Luna smiled warmly upon her and they both came inside.

"Tia will be here shortly. You can tell me everything you would tell her and I will relay the information to her. Excuse my bluntness, but she doesn't have the patience today to sit through all of your explanations. In fact, I think she wants you to just listen today. Proceed.

Twilight explained everything in great detail.

"That was most expected indeed. Pray tell Twilight Sparkle, how do you feel after it all?

"A little bitter, but I am happy that everything turned our fine in the end."

"That is the most spectacular news. Your mind is as strong or stronger than mine then. Tell me, dear friend, do you know the true story of my fall into the darkness?"

Twilight felt a little uncomfortable. Slowly, she said, "Well, Luna, after your return it is generally agreed upon that your integrity was weakened by jealousy allowing the Nightmare to take over."

"Indeed, Twilight Sparkle. However, as it always goes, it is but a part of the truth. Back then our roles were the same as they are now. Tia ruled over the day and dealt with many issues the ponies had. I had my night court and of course I also had to dreamwalk to deal with the troubles that went through ponies' heads as they slept. Now, how did you mentally proceed through the whole ordeal?"

"Well, I only got my peace of mind the day before yesterday, so, honestly speaking, I was living my nightmare these few days, trying to do everything to make my friends' lives go right."

"As expected, Twilight Sparkle. Now, imagine doing this for centuries. And with, let's just say, less moral ponies than your friends." She stopped speaking and smiled.

"You mean-"

"Yes Twilight Sparkle. That was the second major reason I gave in to the Nightmare. After spending some time on the Moon rethinking priorities in my life I think I finally got it and I want you to understand it as well. You personally felt the stress and it was only your five best friends. If you want to be there for everypony as a shoulder to cry on and not go mad, you must first acknowledge that relationships are not made equal. You, your family and best friends come first. Then other friends. Then acquaintances . And so on and so forth. I am not telling you to not take problems of other ponies seriously. Just prioritize. Don't throw your soul into a firestorm just to help some random pony. The wound in our hearts if you lose your mind will never heal."

Twilight said unconvincingly, "I think I got it, Luna."

"I know it is a lot to take in, but you will eventually see where I am coming from. Now, get ready, I think I sense another soul in need of your company."

Once she uttered those words the doors opened, revealing a tired Princess Celestia. She slowly walked into the room and slammed her flank down onto the bed. Luna shot Twilight a reassuring glance, gave Celestia a gentle brush with a wing at which the solar princess snarled and exited the room, locking the doors behind her.

Celestia finally let a groan escape her, turning to face her student. "Twilight, do you know why you are here now?"

"Luna said I was here to listen to you."

"Great, you know. And please, as few questions as possible."

Celestia started talking. About her nearly senile assistant. About the pain-in-the-flank nobles and bureaucrats. Lots of other frustrations escaped her throat, some in a colourful form that Twilight was shocked to hear from her. Still, Celestia was not satisfied. Clearing her throat, she began her confession,

"Twilight, have you ever heard me say the word hate in relation to me having sincere contempt for something?"

"No."

"Well, you are about to hear it now. I hate one thing in life more than anything. I hate not being in control. When things spiraled down and Luna turned into Nightmare, I was in control. I used the smallest amount of Element energy possible to seal her for as little as I could. When you freed my sister, I was in control. I knew Luna's kindness kept the malevolence of Nightmare in control, I knew no harm would come upon you. I knew that underneath the black skin and fangs it was still my sister.

Then Discord broke free. My old friend and enemy. He thought he had me this time, but he should have known better. I waited for you to write, Twilight. All the friendship letters were at the ready. I anticipated his every move and outplayed him on his own board.

Old Chrysalis decided to pay us a visit. She thought she defeated me. Little did she know that I was in control of the situation the whole time. If anything went wrong and the love between Cadence and Shining was not strong enough, I would intervene –" she concentrated and created a small tinted magical shield. A moment later a miniature sun was born inside it. Celestia levitated a wrought iron candlestick from her nightstand and threw it into the shielded sun. It evaporated instantly. She cancelled the spells "– I would scatter her ashes all over Equestria. It is not my way, but I am always ready, just in case.

The loss of the Crystal Empire is an old pain of Luna and I, but I knew that you and your friends would succeed. Discord's prank with the seeds was amusing, but nothing more than that.

Then Tirek came. First Discord betrayed us, then I had to give away my magic. I was no longer in control. I admit that my faith in you wavered when I was lying with my sister and niece chained in Tartarus. You succeeded, as you always do and I can't express the relief I felt when you did. You see, Tirek is the worst thing we have ever faced and not just because he almost prevailed.

Nightmare Moon craved a throne and adoration. She would shroud the land in everlasting night, but with her power and earth pony magic crops would still grow in the night. Equestria would survive, if without me.

For Discord, the world used to be his playing board. He would toy with Equestria for centuries, but he would not let his toys get completely broken. Life would go on, in a bizzare and insane fashion, with Ponyville as the Chaos Capital.

Chrysalis was weak and Sombra a fool. They never stood a chance at succeeding and, again, they wanted subjects and control.

But Tirek is something else entirely. He doesn't care about ponies, he would not "rule" us. He would just suck our magic and strength dry and continue rampaging through the world. The ponykind would die out over the course of several years.

And such is the story of me almost letting Equestria die. I risked everything by sending Discord to retrieve Tirek and then I risked again by giving you all the magic. I should have just gone with Discord and undone the red bastard."

Slowly calming down, she smiled at her shocked student. "Do you want to stay in your old chambers for the night? They are still empty."

Twilight nodded, "Yes Princess, I don't think I'm in condition to fly back."

"Sweet dreams, my favourite student."

"Sweet dreams, my best teacher."

Twilight walked out of the room and went towards her chambers.

Celestia sighed. She was happy to confess, but was still feeling a bit under the weather for no real reason. Suddenly, her blanket moved. Pinkie Pie emerged from it with a pegasus guardpony, gamboge of coat and blue of mane. He looked as if he had just witnessed Everything and Nothing at the same time. "A stallion will cheer you up!"

Celestia looked him over, smiled and nodded.

"Thanks Pinkie. He will."