Invisibleby Rainbowshy32ChaptersAloneIsolatedForsakenAssuranceAloneThe bell over the intercom rang as I sat down in the back desk all the way in the corner. The teacher turned off two of the light switches in the classroom making it warm and inviting to my presence in the room. My name is Olivia, Olivia Myers. I'm an average seventeen year old filly with no one by her side. Ponies laugh and point at the clothes I wear, they all push me around, and all the ponies in my little confounded world hate me now. I used to have friends; Jayson Reed and Lily Campos. Ever since I started here at Terry Pines I met one of the most cutest stallions in school, Drake Castillo. Him and I were so happy together, I even thought about how when we married each other I would take his name, Olivia Castillo... During that time at home, my mom Taylor began disappearing for long hours. Sometimes she would came home all scared and confused, maybe a little hazy. My dad Jim would stay at work almost every night. Leaving me behind at home to fend for myself on the nights they both had something going on. At the time, my friends and Drake would keep me company. Lily or Jayson would always call me and we'd talk for hours. We would have conversations from stallions to gossip about all the crazy ponies at school. One day everything changed... Drake soon began shutting me out, Lily's parents had decided that they would move away which I haven't heard from her since and Jayson began dating mares and didn't need me around anymore for him to feel loved. Today, Drake finally came up to me before class began with a brunette haired mare with his hoof around her and she was clinging onto him like I had done once when him and I were together. "Drake?" I softly asked holding my drawing pad close to my breast, "Who is that?" Inside that drawing pad held all of my drawings of Drake and I together. "Oh this is Ally." Drake responded, "My mare-friend." All that rang in my ears was the one word that used to belong to me, mare-friend. Drake and I used to be an unbreakable pair. All that time he had shut me out and my life soon becoming a living hell, somepony else who was leaving me behind. It didn't help that last night as I slept in bed preparing for the next day. My dad luckily was home, answering the phone as it rang. He talked softly so I couldn't really hear all that he was saying. But I do remember hearing a window break, me running into the living room seeing the busted window, and my father's hooves bloody and shards of glass out of the knuckles of his hands. "Your mom is not coming back." Those words were the only thing that could even come out of his mouth. He walked back into their bedroom, destroying all of mom's personal items. Ripping clothes, Knick - Knacks crashing to the floor and all the jewelry that she had flew out of their drawers and flying outside of the door. Even her wedding ring that she "accidentally" left behind. Now I sit in this dark corner of history class, alone. My parents torn apart in their love, Drake leaving me behind for another mare who looked ten times prettier than me and my both my best friends finding other ponies to be with and leaving me here on the world to fend for myself. Some friends they are... My drawing pad opened on my desk and my art pencil gliding against the paper, cartoon wolves appeared on the cream white sheet of paper, each one significant to my friends and family. To the side of the image, there I was all alone in the darkness with my head down. "Class!" The teacher announced, "Place your homework on your desk and I'll be coming around to pick them up." I stopped drawing long enough to pull my homework out of my binder and follow Mrs. Holland's instructions, afterwards I went right back to what I was doing. Mrs. Holland soon passed by my desk and stopped. My pencil froze and I slowly looked up at her. She had a look on her face like she was either worried or disappointed in my drawing. "Miss. Myers!" Mrs. Holland yelled, "Why are you drawing in this class. You know what my expectations are right?!" Without argument, the drawing pad disappeared into my backpack along with my art pencil, I then pulled out my binder and mechanical pencil. Mrs. Holland smiled and then walked away. I glanced over my classmate's shoulder and found Jayson looking through his notebook. I looked down at my binder; images of Lily and I; Jayson, Lily and I; and then Drake, Lily, Jayson and I all together at once. All the people that didn't care about the clothes that I wore, my personality and the things that I did in my spare time. Now all of us sat apart, all of us not together fighting against the world like it used to be. *** Setting down my backpack and lunchbox at the empty lunch table in the school's courtyard. Sitting at the table where Drake, Lily, Jayson and I used to sit when we were together. As I sat and at my half packed lunch, memories flew by my head as I stared off into space. How I used to sit here with a full table of all the people I loved, always joked and at times whenever something went wrong and tears would come; my friends and stallion-friend would always be there. Looking up from my lunchbox, in front of me stood Drake's new latch-on mare-friend, Ally, and Drake himself with his captivating smile on. "What do you want?" I angrily asked as I turned my head away from him. "Can Ally and I sit here with you?" Drake asked, "We are still friends right?" "FRIENDS?!" I snapped. Both Drake and Ally took a step back as I sprung to my feet in anger. "Why would you think in your right mind," I continued, "would let you and your new clingy mare-friend sit with me who used to ADORE you? Why don't you go sit with Ally's friends who would accept you? Get out of here before I end up punching both of you in the face." "Hey, you keep your hands off of my Drakie-boo." Ally snapped and cooed. "Besides, I had a really rough night last night and you just put the icing on top of my cake of hell for me." "Okay God, I don't need to hear your life story Olivia." Drake responded, "I was just asking a question... Come on my sweet. Let's not sit here with or NEAR this filthy bitch." Drake and Ally both walked away in a huff, Ally stuck her middle finger then turned back around. I sat back down with my stuff, slamming closed my lunchbox. Suddenly I lost my appetite for food. Pulling out my drawing pad, I finished up the drawing I was working on in history class. Drake's wolf had his fetching golden hair that flipped across the top of his head, his appealing emerald green eyes, and his captivating smile that always turned me on. His wolf had that smile and latched onto him was Ally with her sluty smile. Lily was with her new best friend that stayed unnamed to me because I was nothing to her anymore. Jayson was with his girl... Written above all of our heads said the words, "It used to be us against the world. Now it's us against each other. Where did it all go wrong?" *** Opening the door of my home: the lights all shut off, the dark seeping into my pale white fur, setting the mood of my day flowing through the hallways of the place I have called home for over seventeen years. My father wasn't home, probably trying to set some kind of tax that he would have to pay for later or maybe getting something new to help him live inside of his new "home." With mom now gone, and dad probably not interested in caring for his one and only daughter, I was home alone again. I picked up my light blue cellphone and scrolled through my contacts. "Don't like them. Barely know. Pissed at. Don't talk to." I commented each time I read a name. They either made me mad or I didn't even know them. I could've called Lily... But she might've been at the mall or something latching onto someone who would probably break her heart. Back in the sixth grade when I had first moved into town, I came from San Leandro, California moving to her Emerald Isle, North Carolina. Sitting in an empty seat right next to the red haired filly named Lily that was destined to become my sister. Sadly she just banished me out of her life recently. I began watching closely in her Facebook page. "This pony is amazing! She's done so much for me in the pass two weeks." She posted over a month ago. That's all she posted recently though like she stopped using her account all together. The front door opener as then came a large this after the door clicked shut. Running, I found dad on the floor in a daze, his clothes heavily scented with various alcoholic drinks, and his face all bloody and bruises like he got mangled up into a bar fight. "Dad?" I questioned trying to get him off the hard floor, "Are you alright?" "I don't even recall Taylor, all I remember was trying to take a sip of Apple juice and then WHAMO! I'm down on the ground with a stallion on top of me and cops pulling the both of us away." Dad glanced at me and gave a pleasurable hiccup, "At least I've got a wonderful mare like you here." I quickly got up from the floor, "Dad! In not mom, your wife. It's me, Olivia, your daughter." "We don't have a child my wife. Shall we take this into the room?" I continued to back away as dad passionately came towards me. I begged and pleaded to him, "Leave me alone. I'm not Taylor, I'm Olivia your daughter. Your one and only daughter." By he wouldn't listen, he picked me up and threw me onto the bed. I struggled, trying to get away as he laid his body on top of me. IsolatedSitting on the dark quiet bus, only the earbuds singing into my head kept me from thinking hard about my burning lower body. And keeping the images of my confused father on top of me loosing his ratty work suit. It was kind of a thankful moment that no one was next to me, but at the same time I wanted someone that I could vent out to. A person who would take time out of their lives to even talk to me; like Lily and Jayson used to do for me. As I entered the doors of my high school, the threat of being alone weighing heavy on my heart. Jayson all happy with his new girlfriend. Before I met Drake, Jayson was the only boy who would come even close to me. I kind of liked him I have to confess. His flipped deep black hair, the diamond blue eyes, the hint of brown hidden in the roots of his head, the kind personality he had, and then the way he was always there for me. Then I met Drake and he became very quiet and anti-social towards me for a little while, then he finally let Drake into the group he was back to normal, sort of. He began getting a little snippy, but only when Drake was around. "Is Drake with you? You're little latchy bastard?" Jayson would ask everytime he would call me. "Jayson... Drake never comes home with me. You don't have to ask everytime you call me." I would respond back every phone call. That should've been my clue that Jayson was either jealous or he was trying to tell me that I was going to get hurt. I wish I was smart enough to listen to his, somewhat, cryptic messages. "Olivia!" a familiar voice called out towards me beaten ears, "Olivia Myers!" Shaking out of memory lane, I turned around to the sound of the voice calling my name. Quickly walking up to me was Jayson all by himself, his new mare-friend was either sick, out of town, or maybe had some sense knocked into her to let him be mine. Hey Jayson! Look man, Drake broke up with me and all I want is you, I wanted to say, but all that my mouth could even say was, "Hey Jayson. How are you and your mare-friend doing?" "We are doing alright. We just had a little argument about nothing of real importance. How about you and Drake?" He broke up with me... Small tears swelled up in my eyes turning them pink-ish but I stopped the tears and lied, "Everything's okay, Drake's not here today." "Olivia... He was on my bus waiting for you." "I can promise you that he's not waiting for me." I mumbled under my breath. "What?" "Nothing, don't worry about it. It'll just be another burden on your plate of shit." "Olivia what's wrong?" "Nothing is wrong!" I turned and stormed off, not turning my back to face Jayson who was probably chasing after me. He usually can see when something is wrong with me, even when I hide my emotions from him. Probably storming away he'll see me at lunch possibly, interrogating me like I'm some kind of criminal. Why does he even care anyways? His girlfriend, Vivianna, should be his number one priority. Jayson said so himself when Lily and him yelled at each other. All I can rememeber was Lily and I approached him, his girlfriend Vivianna at his side, and then Vivianna and all her friends backed off as Lily and I came close. "Where have you been?!" Lily snapped. Jayson quickly turned around from the sound of Lily's voice. She never really snapped, only if you had really pissed her off. "I've been busy with Vivianna," Jayson responded, "Oh, have you met her yet? Vivianna... This is Lil-" "Whatever! Jayson why haven't you been with us? Drake has disappeared so you don't have to worry about him." "Why do you think I'm worried about that bastard still? I'm not that's for sure. My mare-friend in more important that all of you!" After that Jayson never came to the table, like he had just disappeared off the face of the planet. This had happened a little over ten months ago. Now he is talking to me again, after Vivianna and him argued. Once the bell rang, telling us to make a beeline to our first period class. I didn't hesitate, dashing through the crowded hallways to make my way to chorus class, Lily and I used to have that class together. But we weren't on the same side based on our voice ranges, Lily was over in the Alto group and I was over with the sopranos. Drake even had that class, over in the tenor group. He was an amazing singer, like just as good as the, probably, unknown artist to America, John Barrowman. The notes flowed out of his mouth like a calm river, like the St. John's River in Jacksonville, FL. "Alright everyone, get your binders out, time for a test. The music you had to find for homework, pull it out and we are going to sing them." Mr. Daniel instructed, "I hope you all practiced your songs. Get with your partners and I'll give you about ten minutes to practice one last time." My partner was one of the most popular boys at school, Nathaniel Bruce. A short senior man, his hair was always dolled up in a manly way, his hair color was blond mixed with tones of a sharp burnette color, and then his silver eyes. Nathaniel wasn't blind, but he was born with one of the rarest eye colors in the world. "Hello Olivia!" Nathaniel greeted, "Are you ready for the song to be presented?" "Yeah. I'm ready." I softly responded, "Do you want to practice one last time?" "Only if you need to I'm all ready to go." I don't want to do this test. I debated, But I also don't want Nathaniel to fail. "I'm all ready to go." "Nathaniel and Olivia! You're up." Mr. Daniel called. Nathaniel and I walked up to the front of the room, Mr. Daniel hit the play button on the music as it sang out through the speakers. Nathaniel and I looked at each other and smiled. Once the piano in the song, Just a Dream, stopped and the drums had replaced them, Nathaniel took a breath and began to sing. Once the song ended ever-pony stomped, Nathaniel and I walked off, he soon grabbed my hand. Frozen in my tracks, Nathaniel looked at me and said, "Thank you Olivia. You're a great singer by the way." "Thank you." I responded, "If there is another chance like this, do you want to be my partner again?" "Well I don't want to take you away from your stallion-friend Drake." He's not my stallion-friend. "Oh, yeah... Well it was nice getting to be your partner Nathaniel." "Same here; one day we can do it again. But don't leave out Drake." I nodded my head, Nathaniel walked away to his group of friends that were still practicing. Sitting down at my spot, Drake making his way up to the front of the classroom he just stared at me. The kind of stare that would make every fiber of your body just twist and turn. The entire time before and after his turn, Drake just gave this discomforting stare to me. His emerald green eyes seemed to turn blood red, stabbing knives deep into my heart. The wound Drake left on my heart, the months of shutting me out and then finding out the he found another mare that meant more to him than he did to me. *** Heading down the freshman hallway, the same hallway I walked down just two years ago, I stopped at a science classroom where to the side of the cream colored door saying Ms. Eclipse. I remember sitting in that class with Lily always next to me, even though we talked a lot but we knew when it was a good time to and when it wasn't. Lily and I were the best in the entire class, us against the other kids at our age. I opened the door, poking my head into the slightly open door, at the teacher's desk sat Ms. Eclipse with her cell phone in front of her. She glanced over at her door and smiled her friendly smile. "Hey Olivia, my star student. Haven't seen you in a long time, I've been missing you and Lily. How have you two been doing?" Ms. Eclipse greeted trying to start a conversation. I nodded my head and masked on a smile. Ms. Eclipse's smile disappeared and she returned to her phone. I turned to my drawing pad laying on the desk. Glancing over at the empty desk next to me, Lily's presence still lingered amongst the room but only for a moment. She was there, then she was gone, just like how she just moved away without any warning. I remember that whenever Ms. Eclipse would assign a project Lily and I would always do it together and have it done DAYS before it was due. We always worked so hard together so then we could just hang out. I never was at home, with both of my parents disappearing for long periods of time, Lily would always take me home with her. Well, to say the least, Lily and both of her parents would treat me like I was a sister or their own daughter. The way I wanted my parents to do for me; take time out of their lives to take care of their only daughter. No one to help me with homework, no one to talk about my days worries to, or to even have around to protect me. I had even gone on some animal rescue sites, just to have something that I could care for and would return the favor by listening to my pointless dramas, one who would love me unconditionally. A dog... One day I asked my mom for one, her clothes stained and musty from the heavy smoke. She looked at me with her tired eyes and told me, "You don't have enough responsibility for a dog." "Yes I do, you guys probably don't know much about caring for a kid. You and dad are barely home!" I angrily said. Mom quickly got up and told me, "Go to your room and sit there until you have some respect for us." "I'm only telling the truth." Those were the last words I told my mom before she started getting hazy, shortly after she had lost her job. Maybe it was my fault that mom left causing my father to lash out the way that he did. Smashing everything, going into a bar, and then thinking that I was Taylor, forgetting about me his only filly. *** Sitting in the dark room I call my bedroom, all against the enlightened hallways that ganged up on me to come inside. But each attempt the light tried to seep into my room was futile. As I laid on my bed pondering on what I could possibly do, now that this whole world was against me. My eyes slowly started to close as I was suddenly awaken by the vibrations of my cell phone still in my pocket against my warm world that always kept me safe where nothing went wrong. Looking at the screen, in pixels above the green answer button was Jayson Reed... Taking a deep breath I hit the green button, "Hello." I said. "Hey Olivia. What's going on with you? First you snap at me, and then you weren't at lunch. What's the dealio?" Jayson quickly asked. "I told you Jayson, nothing is wrong." "I can tell something is wrong. I first got a weird vibe from you this morning and you have been on my mind since then. You seemed out of the puzzle today. Now tell me Olivia Myers, what's wrong?!" I remained silent on the other end of the line. He needed to think that everything was okay, when it really wasn't. "Olivia, I know you are doing your bitchy, pissed off silence again and quite frankly, it's really annoying." "Well it's really annoying to find out that both your best friends are well beyond happy without you around. Like you mean nothing to them anymore. Running off with their mare-friend and then leaving me with nothing but the damn clothes on my back. Everyone abandoning you because nothing matters about yourself to them anymore." I quickly hung up and threw my phone across my bedroom, slamming my tear stained face on the white pillow that just hugged the pain, struggling to take it all away. Soon my phone twinkled indicating that a text had come through. I didn't move, my phone could just buzz on forever. No one was going to find out what really was going on inside by broken mind. The pieces left shattered across the floor, unwilling to get up or to even ask someone for help, just to be shattered again. The walls of my little, warm world began to collapse tearing apart piece by piece with all the pain in my head. My world, struggling to stay strong, stronger than the stones that banged up against it. Each stone of the tall wall just kept coming stronger, weakening the once strong willed wall. The now, prisoner of love... ForsakenHead and stomach cramped up, tightened by the rope of pain, Dad left for work yet again, his beaten child left to fend for herself. Last night I had finally checked my phone from the twinkle after Jayson's phone call. It was Jayson, just as I had suspected. "Don't talk to me then!" the text read, "Be the bitch that you are. No matter what Olivia I'm still here. Whenever you are ready to tell me what's going on, I'm right here. See you later girl." Jayson I knew for sure was going to leave me, who needed him anyways... he was a boy with a pretty face, a good personality, and a good friend. The only one I had left here in the world. Damn, what is wrong with me? Another angel soul, gone... This whole disappearing thing started with Drake, running off with his new latchy mare-friend Ally. She seemed familiar to me but I couldn't really make out where I had seen her before. Now I lay here alone and empty in the sunlit rooms; some were filled with hate, some tolerable , and then only two that tried to protect me from everything. The one place I've been in since the moment I was born. Mom despised hospitals, she would avoid them like the plague. I literally was born in my bedroom with my once loving family at my side. When I was only a little girl, from birth till age ten, both my parents didn't work late, stay at bars for long hours, or hang out with friends without me around. Mom stayed at home and Dad would always be home by 2pm to meet me at the bus stop. We all used to be happy together... then I turned thirteen, that's when it all changed. I turned on my, now, cracked phone and opened Facebook. Maybe Lily had posted something new for once, or maybe someone on my friends list had the courtesy to contact me. But all else failed, neither party did what I had hoped. As I scrolled through my news feed something caught my eye, a picture of Lily... just her face. I clicked on the link to the local news channel in her area. "School shooting in San Diego, California. Three injured, one dead." it read across the top of the article. One paragraph really caught my eye... Lily. "Lily Campos was one of the star students here in Terry Pines High. She was well loved by all the students, teachers, and staff, well not all of the students. Over a month ago, during a small fight in the high school's cafeteria, Campos tried to jump in and stop the fight from breaking out. The shooter, Mavis Snow, age 19, walked into the school with a weapon undetected and sought revenge on the innocent teen. Everyone at the school is devastated." My heart froze... "The school and the entire community came and helped Campo's mom, Kaleigh Campos, with the funeral costs ad hope for justice for this once of a kind teenager. The principle of the high school has planned to set up a memorial outside the school grounds for the beloved student." Locking my phone, I dropped it on the ground which landed on the carpet floor of my room with a thud. "Revenge..." that was the only word that spun in my mind. Lily didn't exist in this world anymore. My heart sank down my body, to the point where it felt like my heart was no more. My soul drained out of my body, the world seemed to close its walls onto me, squeezing every last drop of my happiness till I was left dry. Lily died because of an act of kindness she had performed. She's done it before, for me, but no one wanted revenge like this on her exactly. Actually, no one that picked on me had ever seeked revenge on Lily. They would run away with their tails tucked between their legs and never bother me again. Lily was mostly like a guardian angel, like one day when she sent me a picture saying that friends are God's way of taking care of us. There rarely was a time that Lily cursed, she always went to church, that's probably where she got her kindness spirit from. The only time I remember Lily cursing was when someone randomly came up to her and said some rude things about her. She defended herself, verbally no fight required. Lily was an amazing pony, one that would see past my flaws and never leave my side. She didn't move by choice, she moved by force. Because of her move, now she's dead because of her parents. If she stayed here, she wouldn't be fucking dead she'd still be here by my side. I needed her now more than anything. The walls of my once comfortable room, where everything of my hated life would disappear, the walls collapsed down to the ground to the ground. The one thing holding those stones together was now gone. *** As the glowing sun disappeared below the mountains that lured miles away from home, the house grew dark. I didn't turn on the light, afraid that the fluorescent light would try to make the matters of my life worse. Whispers linger in my head telling me, "worthless, disliked, waste of time, or a person with no purpose to others." Soon my phone rang, the pixilation read out, "Dad." As much as I didn't want to answer my phone, if I didn't he would continue to call me until he got word to me, like he was going to die or something idiotic like that. He would say it's because I care, well bastard you obviously don't if you can't take time out of your work to be with your only daughter in your life. "Hello." I finally answered, the background noise ringing through the phone and into my ear. I could hear phones ringing, people talking, and papers rustling that might be on his desk. "Hey Olivia, look my office has now become complete and most of the stuff I can't leave. The house has become uncomfortable for me." "I know the feeling." "Listen Olivia, I hope you can take care of yourself. You're old enough, I won't be coming home." The sound of his voice tuned out of my head right after he said, I won't be coming home. Home alone for the rest of my time here in Emerald Isle, North Carolina, abandoned in the home where happiness once resided deep in the cracks of the tile floor, even in the uncomfortable blood stains in the corner of my bedroom covered by the dresser where my clothes lay unaware of my pain. My heart that had once would beat love throughout my entire body of which warmth once took over. Now the pain coursed through my battered body, the cold wrapping itself around me like a blanket. Even though I didn't shiver on the outside, not even a frost bitten pinkie toe, deep in the recess' of my body, everything was blue and chipping off. Even the tiny Goosebumps making my muscles look like chicken skin. Lily was now dead both in the world and in my heart, she disappeared from my life in a split second, a bullet from a vengeful spirited mare who could've thought or gotten to know Lily before the trigger was pushed and the bullet left the gun. Jayson was too busy with Viviana but oddly latching onto me for guidance, something he hadn't done for months. Drake and Ally giving me uncomfortable stares ever since I snapped at them, which is completely odd. The both of my parents who at once couldn't get enough of me didn't want anything to do with me, let alone even lay one eye on me, not even a loving gaze. Curling up into a ball in the living room of my once loving, happy home, tears speeding down my face, crashing into each other as they met past my quivering lips. The darkness and cold choked me inside its uncomforting ways. Seeping deep into the pale skin that tried to fight it off. When the trying warm sun disappeared into the horizon as I climbed up onto the roof of the house, something Drake and I used to do to watch the moonrise together, well through FaceTime. When I turned around to face the other side of the house, looking at the front yards of my neighbors across the street. The moon gleamed across the enlightened streets of Emerald Isle. Usually I would smile at the sight of the moon appearing into the sky, but the muscles that normally would cause you to smile seemed unknown to my thought process. I just stared at the moon as it slowly moved up the sky, climbing the ladder of the few stars in the sky. climbing down off the roof, with the thought of jumping down, breaking my leg, then bleeding to death laying in the grass where I used to walk on playfully or happily. Each blade of grass would stab away the pain of my recent life, the blood would release all the words that were or close to the word pain. Laying down on the couch of my home, the cushions didn't provide comfort like my bed did. I know I could just get up and move there, but the muscles in my legs suddenly couldn't work, I couldn't move to stand. Like my whole body was being overtaken by the cold, making itself known to this broken body. What more was left for me? my mind kept asking itself, I have no dreams, they don't exist anymore. What have I done to deserve this abuse? Was it something I said? Done? Or is it just me in general? It there a place I could go where this damed bitter hatred didn't reside deep in my mind? Where do I belong? AssuranceThe overflowing of hate on Facebook has only gotten worse, both Ally and Drake have the whole school against me. The amazing group that I used to be in, the school paper, my friends and my family. It's sad to know that my life has come to a close like this. With two slips of paper in one hand and the weapon of choice hiding deep into my backpack, out of sight and out of the thoughts of other ponies. In the hallway near history class, stood Jayson alone, his phone up to his face like it normally would be. Tapping him on the shoulder, Jayson pulled his mind away from his phone and smiled his charming smile. The last time I'd ever see that smile. His gorgeous blue eyes, the way he flipped hair was, and God that smile, that captivating smile. As much as I was going to miss him, oh how much I was going to cry as I will sit in the bathroom close by where my fate would end. "What's up Olivia?" Jayson asked as I stared at him. He acted like nothing had ever happened between him and I, it was kind... last time I'd ever get that. "Oh... here Jayson. I hope things get better for you soon." I responded handing him to slip of paper. Jayson stared at the paper then looked up at me with a shocked look. Passing by Ally I dropped the other slip of paper at her feet and continued walking. Without question, let alone a word, I heard the paper crinkle in her hand. Now hiding in the bathroom across the hallway, the door locked and the people that were around all left to make it to class. Pulling my binder out of my backpack, the images of my friends spread all across the front of it. Lily, Drake, and Jayson with their arms all around me and their words of love left preserved under the clear plastic that held it all together. I smiled... The last one I'll ever have in these last few moments of my life. Joining Lily up in the land that she told me was called heaven, where there is no more pain, hate or sorrow. I knew she was up there, but the way there was hard. Well probably for me anyway... what good things have I done? I don't recall anything horrible. "Olivia open up, you don't need to do this!" Jayson's voice vibrated against the closed door that held all the pain away. "Go away Jayson... it's too late." I cried as the knife stored away in my backpack came out, "You can thank Ally and Drake for this." I hiccupped trying to catch my breath, "I'm so, so sorry Jayson. Please forgive me." "You don't have to do this!" he sighed, "Can I tell you a secret Olivia?" "Make it quick..." "Olivia... Since you moved here, the reason I became your friend... Olivia Veronica Myers, the reason at times I'd act a little odd and would always be there for you was because I have feelings for you too." I paused, Jayson loved me? "But... why did you start dating Viviana? You loved her, didn't you?" "I did, but my intent for it was to make you jealous. Since you and Drake were dating I didn't think you liked me. I wanted you to be jealous of the fact that I had a girl. And the reason that I despised Drake and would ask if he was around was because I was jealous! I can't lie anymore! I LOVE YOU OLIVIA!" Shoving the knife back into my backpack I opened the door to a tear stained Jayson with his smile trying to emerge against the tears hat battled his body. "Do you really like me?" I asked gently. It had seemed that right now, at this moment, all the things wrong with me seemed to have disappeared. Like the death of Lily, my mother and father leaving me to fend for myself and then Drake and Ally... well you know the story. "I do Olivia... honest." "Prove it!" Immediately, he grabbed my broken hoof. His other hoof touched my tear stained face, his warm hoof seemed to take away all the pain I had all the way from me. In a split second, his lips met mine. The kiss was different, one that I had wished to feel since I was young, one of those kissed that felt like they would last through all eternity. I grabbed onto Jayson with both my hooves, I didn't want to let him go. Soon he pulled his face away from mine, his captivating smile appeared again without any struggle. With my hooves still wrapped around him, for once since all of this happened my fake smile became a real one. The pain that resided deep within me seemed to fade away like it was only a distant memory. "But wait... what about Ally and Drake?" I asked with my hands now holding his. "Who needs them. You have me and I have you, nothing and nobody is going to bother us. Whatever people say about you, I look at those as they are part of your beauty," Jayson responded, "Besides, you are made as you are. Nothing is going to change my opinion about you Olivia, I love you." For a long moment, Jayson and I stared at each other, it seemed like it was just him and I in this confounded world together. I loved it, this world seemed the one that I had always wanted. Was I trapped in a dream? Did I really die? Did I commit suicide in that bathroom? Was Lily still alive? Was I still dating Drake? Was Jayson dating Viviana still? "Olivia?" Jayson asked, "Are you okay?" "Am I dreaming this? Or am I already dead?" I questioned trying to get an answer. "No, you are very much alive and you aren't dreaming. Can I also ask you something?" "What is it?" "Would...would you...uh..." he stuttered with his eyes facing down and his head following behind it, "Would you go with me to the movies and dinner afterwards?" I smiled, but then it slowly disappeared, "I'd love to, but I don't think I have the money for it all. Since both my parents left me at home to completely fend for myself, I have nothing left over." "Don't worry about it. I'll pay, my treat, for my girl." Jayson grabbed my tear stained face gently and kissed my cheek, "So. Do you want to go?" I smiled, "Yes." Jayson grabbed my hand, I held onto his soul with every grip I had left. But that grip was getting stronger like Jayson was all I needed in my life. When we walked out of the room, there stood Ally with her hooves crossed against her tiny chest. "Oh look at that, you two are holding hooves." Ally teased. "Back off Ally, as much as I know that you liked me, I never want to be with a bitch like you. Olivia deserves my love, you have no respect from me anymore. Go ahead and make yourself proud and keep hating on her and I. It won't bother us anymore." Jayson snapped back, defending me like no other man had done before. Ally's mouth opened and she quickly turned around, falling into Drake's hooves. Jayson turned around just as soon as I did, his comforting eyes stared into mine. What Ally had said didn't seem to bother me the same way anymore, because of Jayson. I had been looking for a stallion, and I thought Drake was it. But I was mistaken, Jayson was my one and only...
AloneThe bell over the intercom rang as I sat down in the back desk all the way in the corner. The teacher turned off two of the light switches in the classroom making it warm and inviting to my presence in the room. My name is Olivia, Olivia Myers. I'm an average seventeen year old filly with no one by her side. Ponies laugh and point at the clothes I wear, they all push me around, and all the ponies in my little confounded world hate me now. I used to have friends; Jayson Reed and Lily Campos. Ever since I started here at Terry Pines I met one of the most cutest stallions in school, Drake Castillo. Him and I were so happy together, I even thought about how when we married each other I would take his name, Olivia Castillo... During that time at home, my mom Taylor began disappearing for long hours. Sometimes she would came home all scared and confused, maybe a little hazy. My dad Jim would stay at work almost every night. Leaving me behind at home to fend for myself on the nights they both had something going on. At the time, my friends and Drake would keep me company. Lily or Jayson would always call me and we'd talk for hours. We would have conversations from stallions to gossip about all the crazy ponies at school. One day everything changed... Drake soon began shutting me out, Lily's parents had decided that they would move away which I haven't heard from her since and Jayson began dating mares and didn't need me around anymore for him to feel loved. Today, Drake finally came up to me before class began with a brunette haired mare with his hoof around her and she was clinging onto him like I had done once when him and I were together. "Drake?" I softly asked holding my drawing pad close to my breast, "Who is that?" Inside that drawing pad held all of my drawings of Drake and I together. "Oh this is Ally." Drake responded, "My mare-friend." All that rang in my ears was the one word that used to belong to me, mare-friend. Drake and I used to be an unbreakable pair. All that time he had shut me out and my life soon becoming a living hell, somepony else who was leaving me behind. It didn't help that last night as I slept in bed preparing for the next day. My dad luckily was home, answering the phone as it rang. He talked softly so I couldn't really hear all that he was saying. But I do remember hearing a window break, me running into the living room seeing the busted window, and my father's hooves bloody and shards of glass out of the knuckles of his hands. "Your mom is not coming back." Those words were the only thing that could even come out of his mouth. He walked back into their bedroom, destroying all of mom's personal items. Ripping clothes, Knick - Knacks crashing to the floor and all the jewelry that she had flew out of their drawers and flying outside of the door. Even her wedding ring that she "accidentally" left behind. Now I sit in this dark corner of history class, alone. My parents torn apart in their love, Drake leaving me behind for another mare who looked ten times prettier than me and my both my best friends finding other ponies to be with and leaving me here on the world to fend for myself. Some friends they are... My drawing pad opened on my desk and my art pencil gliding against the paper, cartoon wolves appeared on the cream white sheet of paper, each one significant to my friends and family. To the side of the image, there I was all alone in the darkness with my head down. "Class!" The teacher announced, "Place your homework on your desk and I'll be coming around to pick them up." I stopped drawing long enough to pull my homework out of my binder and follow Mrs. Holland's instructions, afterwards I went right back to what I was doing. Mrs. Holland soon passed by my desk and stopped. My pencil froze and I slowly looked up at her. She had a look on her face like she was either worried or disappointed in my drawing. "Miss. Myers!" Mrs. Holland yelled, "Why are you drawing in this class. You know what my expectations are right?!" Without argument, the drawing pad disappeared into my backpack along with my art pencil, I then pulled out my binder and mechanical pencil. Mrs. Holland smiled and then walked away. I glanced over my classmate's shoulder and found Jayson looking through his notebook. I looked down at my binder; images of Lily and I; Jayson, Lily and I; and then Drake, Lily, Jayson and I all together at once. All the people that didn't care about the clothes that I wore, my personality and the things that I did in my spare time. Now all of us sat apart, all of us not together fighting against the world like it used to be. *** Setting down my backpack and lunchbox at the empty lunch table in the school's courtyard. Sitting at the table where Drake, Lily, Jayson and I used to sit when we were together. As I sat and at my half packed lunch, memories flew by my head as I stared off into space. How I used to sit here with a full table of all the people I loved, always joked and at times whenever something went wrong and tears would come; my friends and stallion-friend would always be there. Looking up from my lunchbox, in front of me stood Drake's new latch-on mare-friend, Ally, and Drake himself with his captivating smile on. "What do you want?" I angrily asked as I turned my head away from him. "Can Ally and I sit here with you?" Drake asked, "We are still friends right?" "FRIENDS?!" I snapped. Both Drake and Ally took a step back as I sprung to my feet in anger. "Why would you think in your right mind," I continued, "would let you and your new clingy mare-friend sit with me who used to ADORE you? Why don't you go sit with Ally's friends who would accept you? Get out of here before I end up punching both of you in the face." "Hey, you keep your hands off of my Drakie-boo." Ally snapped and cooed. "Besides, I had a really rough night last night and you just put the icing on top of my cake of hell for me." "Okay God, I don't need to hear your life story Olivia." Drake responded, "I was just asking a question... Come on my sweet. Let's not sit here with or NEAR this filthy bitch." Drake and Ally both walked away in a huff, Ally stuck her middle finger then turned back around. I sat back down with my stuff, slamming closed my lunchbox. Suddenly I lost my appetite for food. Pulling out my drawing pad, I finished up the drawing I was working on in history class. Drake's wolf had his fetching golden hair that flipped across the top of his head, his appealing emerald green eyes, and his captivating smile that always turned me on. His wolf had that smile and latched onto him was Ally with her sluty smile. Lily was with her new best friend that stayed unnamed to me because I was nothing to her anymore. Jayson was with his girl... Written above all of our heads said the words, "It used to be us against the world. Now it's us against each other. Where did it all go wrong?" *** Opening the door of my home: the lights all shut off, the dark seeping into my pale white fur, setting the mood of my day flowing through the hallways of the place I have called home for over seventeen years. My father wasn't home, probably trying to set some kind of tax that he would have to pay for later or maybe getting something new to help him live inside of his new "home." With mom now gone, and dad probably not interested in caring for his one and only daughter, I was home alone again. I picked up my light blue cellphone and scrolled through my contacts. "Don't like them. Barely know. Pissed at. Don't talk to." I commented each time I read a name. They either made me mad or I didn't even know them. I could've called Lily... But she might've been at the mall or something latching onto someone who would probably break her heart. Back in the sixth grade when I had first moved into town, I came from San Leandro, California moving to her Emerald Isle, North Carolina. Sitting in an empty seat right next to the red haired filly named Lily that was destined to become my sister. Sadly she just banished me out of her life recently. I began watching closely in her Facebook page. "This pony is amazing! She's done so much for me in the pass two weeks." She posted over a month ago. That's all she posted recently though like she stopped using her account all together. The front door opener as then came a large this after the door clicked shut. Running, I found dad on the floor in a daze, his clothes heavily scented with various alcoholic drinks, and his face all bloody and bruises like he got mangled up into a bar fight. "Dad?" I questioned trying to get him off the hard floor, "Are you alright?" "I don't even recall Taylor, all I remember was trying to take a sip of Apple juice and then WHAMO! I'm down on the ground with a stallion on top of me and cops pulling the both of us away." Dad glanced at me and gave a pleasurable hiccup, "At least I've got a wonderful mare like you here." I quickly got up from the floor, "Dad! In not mom, your wife. It's me, Olivia, your daughter." "We don't have a child my wife. Shall we take this into the room?" I continued to back away as dad passionately came towards me. I begged and pleaded to him, "Leave me alone. I'm not Taylor, I'm Olivia your daughter. Your one and only daughter." By he wouldn't listen, he picked me up and threw me onto the bed. I struggled, trying to get away as he laid his body on top of me.
IsolatedSitting on the dark quiet bus, only the earbuds singing into my head kept me from thinking hard about my burning lower body. And keeping the images of my confused father on top of me loosing his ratty work suit. It was kind of a thankful moment that no one was next to me, but at the same time I wanted someone that I could vent out to. A person who would take time out of their lives to even talk to me; like Lily and Jayson used to do for me. As I entered the doors of my high school, the threat of being alone weighing heavy on my heart. Jayson all happy with his new girlfriend. Before I met Drake, Jayson was the only boy who would come even close to me. I kind of liked him I have to confess. His flipped deep black hair, the diamond blue eyes, the hint of brown hidden in the roots of his head, the kind personality he had, and then the way he was always there for me. Then I met Drake and he became very quiet and anti-social towards me for a little while, then he finally let Drake into the group he was back to normal, sort of. He began getting a little snippy, but only when Drake was around. "Is Drake with you? You're little latchy bastard?" Jayson would ask everytime he would call me. "Jayson... Drake never comes home with me. You don't have to ask everytime you call me." I would respond back every phone call. That should've been my clue that Jayson was either jealous or he was trying to tell me that I was going to get hurt. I wish I was smart enough to listen to his, somewhat, cryptic messages. "Olivia!" a familiar voice called out towards me beaten ears, "Olivia Myers!" Shaking out of memory lane, I turned around to the sound of the voice calling my name. Quickly walking up to me was Jayson all by himself, his new mare-friend was either sick, out of town, or maybe had some sense knocked into her to let him be mine. Hey Jayson! Look man, Drake broke up with me and all I want is you, I wanted to say, but all that my mouth could even say was, "Hey Jayson. How are you and your mare-friend doing?" "We are doing alright. We just had a little argument about nothing of real importance. How about you and Drake?" He broke up with me... Small tears swelled up in my eyes turning them pink-ish but I stopped the tears and lied, "Everything's okay, Drake's not here today." "Olivia... He was on my bus waiting for you." "I can promise you that he's not waiting for me." I mumbled under my breath. "What?" "Nothing, don't worry about it. It'll just be another burden on your plate of shit." "Olivia what's wrong?" "Nothing is wrong!" I turned and stormed off, not turning my back to face Jayson who was probably chasing after me. He usually can see when something is wrong with me, even when I hide my emotions from him. Probably storming away he'll see me at lunch possibly, interrogating me like I'm some kind of criminal. Why does he even care anyways? His girlfriend, Vivianna, should be his number one priority. Jayson said so himself when Lily and him yelled at each other. All I can rememeber was Lily and I approached him, his girlfriend Vivianna at his side, and then Vivianna and all her friends backed off as Lily and I came close. "Where have you been?!" Lily snapped. Jayson quickly turned around from the sound of Lily's voice. She never really snapped, only if you had really pissed her off. "I've been busy with Vivianna," Jayson responded, "Oh, have you met her yet? Vivianna... This is Lil-" "Whatever! Jayson why haven't you been with us? Drake has disappeared so you don't have to worry about him." "Why do you think I'm worried about that bastard still? I'm not that's for sure. My mare-friend in more important that all of you!" After that Jayson never came to the table, like he had just disappeared off the face of the planet. This had happened a little over ten months ago. Now he is talking to me again, after Vivianna and him argued. Once the bell rang, telling us to make a beeline to our first period class. I didn't hesitate, dashing through the crowded hallways to make my way to chorus class, Lily and I used to have that class together. But we weren't on the same side based on our voice ranges, Lily was over in the Alto group and I was over with the sopranos. Drake even had that class, over in the tenor group. He was an amazing singer, like just as good as the, probably, unknown artist to America, John Barrowman. The notes flowed out of his mouth like a calm river, like the St. John's River in Jacksonville, FL. "Alright everyone, get your binders out, time for a test. The music you had to find for homework, pull it out and we are going to sing them." Mr. Daniel instructed, "I hope you all practiced your songs. Get with your partners and I'll give you about ten minutes to practice one last time." My partner was one of the most popular boys at school, Nathaniel Bruce. A short senior man, his hair was always dolled up in a manly way, his hair color was blond mixed with tones of a sharp burnette color, and then his silver eyes. Nathaniel wasn't blind, but he was born with one of the rarest eye colors in the world. "Hello Olivia!" Nathaniel greeted, "Are you ready for the song to be presented?" "Yeah. I'm ready." I softly responded, "Do you want to practice one last time?" "Only if you need to I'm all ready to go." I don't want to do this test. I debated, But I also don't want Nathaniel to fail. "I'm all ready to go." "Nathaniel and Olivia! You're up." Mr. Daniel called. Nathaniel and I walked up to the front of the room, Mr. Daniel hit the play button on the music as it sang out through the speakers. Nathaniel and I looked at each other and smiled. Once the piano in the song, Just a Dream, stopped and the drums had replaced them, Nathaniel took a breath and began to sing. Once the song ended ever-pony stomped, Nathaniel and I walked off, he soon grabbed my hand. Frozen in my tracks, Nathaniel looked at me and said, "Thank you Olivia. You're a great singer by the way." "Thank you." I responded, "If there is another chance like this, do you want to be my partner again?" "Well I don't want to take you away from your stallion-friend Drake." He's not my stallion-friend. "Oh, yeah... Well it was nice getting to be your partner Nathaniel." "Same here; one day we can do it again. But don't leave out Drake." I nodded my head, Nathaniel walked away to his group of friends that were still practicing. Sitting down at my spot, Drake making his way up to the front of the classroom he just stared at me. The kind of stare that would make every fiber of your body just twist and turn. The entire time before and after his turn, Drake just gave this discomforting stare to me. His emerald green eyes seemed to turn blood red, stabbing knives deep into my heart. The wound Drake left on my heart, the months of shutting me out and then finding out the he found another mare that meant more to him than he did to me. *** Heading down the freshman hallway, the same hallway I walked down just two years ago, I stopped at a science classroom where to the side of the cream colored door saying Ms. Eclipse. I remember sitting in that class with Lily always next to me, even though we talked a lot but we knew when it was a good time to and when it wasn't. Lily and I were the best in the entire class, us against the other kids at our age. I opened the door, poking my head into the slightly open door, at the teacher's desk sat Ms. Eclipse with her cell phone in front of her. She glanced over at her door and smiled her friendly smile. "Hey Olivia, my star student. Haven't seen you in a long time, I've been missing you and Lily. How have you two been doing?" Ms. Eclipse greeted trying to start a conversation. I nodded my head and masked on a smile. Ms. Eclipse's smile disappeared and she returned to her phone. I turned to my drawing pad laying on the desk. Glancing over at the empty desk next to me, Lily's presence still lingered amongst the room but only for a moment. She was there, then she was gone, just like how she just moved away without any warning. I remember that whenever Ms. Eclipse would assign a project Lily and I would always do it together and have it done DAYS before it was due. We always worked so hard together so then we could just hang out. I never was at home, with both of my parents disappearing for long periods of time, Lily would always take me home with her. Well, to say the least, Lily and both of her parents would treat me like I was a sister or their own daughter. The way I wanted my parents to do for me; take time out of their lives to take care of their only daughter. No one to help me with homework, no one to talk about my days worries to, or to even have around to protect me. I had even gone on some animal rescue sites, just to have something that I could care for and would return the favor by listening to my pointless dramas, one who would love me unconditionally. A dog... One day I asked my mom for one, her clothes stained and musty from the heavy smoke. She looked at me with her tired eyes and told me, "You don't have enough responsibility for a dog." "Yes I do, you guys probably don't know much about caring for a kid. You and dad are barely home!" I angrily said. Mom quickly got up and told me, "Go to your room and sit there until you have some respect for us." "I'm only telling the truth." Those were the last words I told my mom before she started getting hazy, shortly after she had lost her job. Maybe it was my fault that mom left causing my father to lash out the way that he did. Smashing everything, going into a bar, and then thinking that I was Taylor, forgetting about me his only filly. *** Sitting in the dark room I call my bedroom, all against the enlightened hallways that ganged up on me to come inside. But each attempt the light tried to seep into my room was futile. As I laid on my bed pondering on what I could possibly do, now that this whole world was against me. My eyes slowly started to close as I was suddenly awaken by the vibrations of my cell phone still in my pocket against my warm world that always kept me safe where nothing went wrong. Looking at the screen, in pixels above the green answer button was Jayson Reed... Taking a deep breath I hit the green button, "Hello." I said. "Hey Olivia. What's going on with you? First you snap at me, and then you weren't at lunch. What's the dealio?" Jayson quickly asked. "I told you Jayson, nothing is wrong." "I can tell something is wrong. I first got a weird vibe from you this morning and you have been on my mind since then. You seemed out of the puzzle today. Now tell me Olivia Myers, what's wrong?!" I remained silent on the other end of the line. He needed to think that everything was okay, when it really wasn't. "Olivia, I know you are doing your bitchy, pissed off silence again and quite frankly, it's really annoying." "Well it's really annoying to find out that both your best friends are well beyond happy without you around. Like you mean nothing to them anymore. Running off with their mare-friend and then leaving me with nothing but the damn clothes on my back. Everyone abandoning you because nothing matters about yourself to them anymore." I quickly hung up and threw my phone across my bedroom, slamming my tear stained face on the white pillow that just hugged the pain, struggling to take it all away. Soon my phone twinkled indicating that a text had come through. I didn't move, my phone could just buzz on forever. No one was going to find out what really was going on inside by broken mind. The pieces left shattered across the floor, unwilling to get up or to even ask someone for help, just to be shattered again. The walls of my little, warm world began to collapse tearing apart piece by piece with all the pain in my head. My world, struggling to stay strong, stronger than the stones that banged up against it. Each stone of the tall wall just kept coming stronger, weakening the once strong willed wall. The now, prisoner of love...
ForsakenHead and stomach cramped up, tightened by the rope of pain, Dad left for work yet again, his beaten child left to fend for herself. Last night I had finally checked my phone from the twinkle after Jayson's phone call. It was Jayson, just as I had suspected. "Don't talk to me then!" the text read, "Be the bitch that you are. No matter what Olivia I'm still here. Whenever you are ready to tell me what's going on, I'm right here. See you later girl." Jayson I knew for sure was going to leave me, who needed him anyways... he was a boy with a pretty face, a good personality, and a good friend. The only one I had left here in the world. Damn, what is wrong with me? Another angel soul, gone... This whole disappearing thing started with Drake, running off with his new latchy mare-friend Ally. She seemed familiar to me but I couldn't really make out where I had seen her before. Now I lay here alone and empty in the sunlit rooms; some were filled with hate, some tolerable , and then only two that tried to protect me from everything. The one place I've been in since the moment I was born. Mom despised hospitals, she would avoid them like the plague. I literally was born in my bedroom with my once loving family at my side. When I was only a little girl, from birth till age ten, both my parents didn't work late, stay at bars for long hours, or hang out with friends without me around. Mom stayed at home and Dad would always be home by 2pm to meet me at the bus stop. We all used to be happy together... then I turned thirteen, that's when it all changed. I turned on my, now, cracked phone and opened Facebook. Maybe Lily had posted something new for once, or maybe someone on my friends list had the courtesy to contact me. But all else failed, neither party did what I had hoped. As I scrolled through my news feed something caught my eye, a picture of Lily... just her face. I clicked on the link to the local news channel in her area. "School shooting in San Diego, California. Three injured, one dead." it read across the top of the article. One paragraph really caught my eye... Lily. "Lily Campos was one of the star students here in Terry Pines High. She was well loved by all the students, teachers, and staff, well not all of the students. Over a month ago, during a small fight in the high school's cafeteria, Campos tried to jump in and stop the fight from breaking out. The shooter, Mavis Snow, age 19, walked into the school with a weapon undetected and sought revenge on the innocent teen. Everyone at the school is devastated." My heart froze... "The school and the entire community came and helped Campo's mom, Kaleigh Campos, with the funeral costs ad hope for justice for this once of a kind teenager. The principle of the high school has planned to set up a memorial outside the school grounds for the beloved student." Locking my phone, I dropped it on the ground which landed on the carpet floor of my room with a thud. "Revenge..." that was the only word that spun in my mind. Lily didn't exist in this world anymore. My heart sank down my body, to the point where it felt like my heart was no more. My soul drained out of my body, the world seemed to close its walls onto me, squeezing every last drop of my happiness till I was left dry. Lily died because of an act of kindness she had performed. She's done it before, for me, but no one wanted revenge like this on her exactly. Actually, no one that picked on me had ever seeked revenge on Lily. They would run away with their tails tucked between their legs and never bother me again. Lily was mostly like a guardian angel, like one day when she sent me a picture saying that friends are God's way of taking care of us. There rarely was a time that Lily cursed, she always went to church, that's probably where she got her kindness spirit from. The only time I remember Lily cursing was when someone randomly came up to her and said some rude things about her. She defended herself, verbally no fight required. Lily was an amazing pony, one that would see past my flaws and never leave my side. She didn't move by choice, she moved by force. Because of her move, now she's dead because of her parents. If she stayed here, she wouldn't be fucking dead she'd still be here by my side. I needed her now more than anything. The walls of my once comfortable room, where everything of my hated life would disappear, the walls collapsed down to the ground to the ground. The one thing holding those stones together was now gone. *** As the glowing sun disappeared below the mountains that lured miles away from home, the house grew dark. I didn't turn on the light, afraid that the fluorescent light would try to make the matters of my life worse. Whispers linger in my head telling me, "worthless, disliked, waste of time, or a person with no purpose to others." Soon my phone rang, the pixilation read out, "Dad." As much as I didn't want to answer my phone, if I didn't he would continue to call me until he got word to me, like he was going to die or something idiotic like that. He would say it's because I care, well bastard you obviously don't if you can't take time out of your work to be with your only daughter in your life. "Hello." I finally answered, the background noise ringing through the phone and into my ear. I could hear phones ringing, people talking, and papers rustling that might be on his desk. "Hey Olivia, look my office has now become complete and most of the stuff I can't leave. The house has become uncomfortable for me." "I know the feeling." "Listen Olivia, I hope you can take care of yourself. You're old enough, I won't be coming home." The sound of his voice tuned out of my head right after he said, I won't be coming home. Home alone for the rest of my time here in Emerald Isle, North Carolina, abandoned in the home where happiness once resided deep in the cracks of the tile floor, even in the uncomfortable blood stains in the corner of my bedroom covered by the dresser where my clothes lay unaware of my pain. My heart that had once would beat love throughout my entire body of which warmth once took over. Now the pain coursed through my battered body, the cold wrapping itself around me like a blanket. Even though I didn't shiver on the outside, not even a frost bitten pinkie toe, deep in the recess' of my body, everything was blue and chipping off. Even the tiny Goosebumps making my muscles look like chicken skin. Lily was now dead both in the world and in my heart, she disappeared from my life in a split second, a bullet from a vengeful spirited mare who could've thought or gotten to know Lily before the trigger was pushed and the bullet left the gun. Jayson was too busy with Viviana but oddly latching onto me for guidance, something he hadn't done for months. Drake and Ally giving me uncomfortable stares ever since I snapped at them, which is completely odd. The both of my parents who at once couldn't get enough of me didn't want anything to do with me, let alone even lay one eye on me, not even a loving gaze. Curling up into a ball in the living room of my once loving, happy home, tears speeding down my face, crashing into each other as they met past my quivering lips. The darkness and cold choked me inside its uncomforting ways. Seeping deep into the pale skin that tried to fight it off. When the trying warm sun disappeared into the horizon as I climbed up onto the roof of the house, something Drake and I used to do to watch the moonrise together, well through FaceTime. When I turned around to face the other side of the house, looking at the front yards of my neighbors across the street. The moon gleamed across the enlightened streets of Emerald Isle. Usually I would smile at the sight of the moon appearing into the sky, but the muscles that normally would cause you to smile seemed unknown to my thought process. I just stared at the moon as it slowly moved up the sky, climbing the ladder of the few stars in the sky. climbing down off the roof, with the thought of jumping down, breaking my leg, then bleeding to death laying in the grass where I used to walk on playfully or happily. Each blade of grass would stab away the pain of my recent life, the blood would release all the words that were or close to the word pain. Laying down on the couch of my home, the cushions didn't provide comfort like my bed did. I know I could just get up and move there, but the muscles in my legs suddenly couldn't work, I couldn't move to stand. Like my whole body was being overtaken by the cold, making itself known to this broken body. What more was left for me? my mind kept asking itself, I have no dreams, they don't exist anymore. What have I done to deserve this abuse? Was it something I said? Done? Or is it just me in general? It there a place I could go where this damed bitter hatred didn't reside deep in my mind? Where do I belong?
AssuranceThe overflowing of hate on Facebook has only gotten worse, both Ally and Drake have the whole school against me. The amazing group that I used to be in, the school paper, my friends and my family. It's sad to know that my life has come to a close like this. With two slips of paper in one hand and the weapon of choice hiding deep into my backpack, out of sight and out of the thoughts of other ponies. In the hallway near history class, stood Jayson alone, his phone up to his face like it normally would be. Tapping him on the shoulder, Jayson pulled his mind away from his phone and smiled his charming smile. The last time I'd ever see that smile. His gorgeous blue eyes, the way he flipped hair was, and God that smile, that captivating smile. As much as I was going to miss him, oh how much I was going to cry as I will sit in the bathroom close by where my fate would end. "What's up Olivia?" Jayson asked as I stared at him. He acted like nothing had ever happened between him and I, it was kind... last time I'd ever get that. "Oh... here Jayson. I hope things get better for you soon." I responded handing him to slip of paper. Jayson stared at the paper then looked up at me with a shocked look. Passing by Ally I dropped the other slip of paper at her feet and continued walking. Without question, let alone a word, I heard the paper crinkle in her hand. Now hiding in the bathroom across the hallway, the door locked and the people that were around all left to make it to class. Pulling my binder out of my backpack, the images of my friends spread all across the front of it. Lily, Drake, and Jayson with their arms all around me and their words of love left preserved under the clear plastic that held it all together. I smiled... The last one I'll ever have in these last few moments of my life. Joining Lily up in the land that she told me was called heaven, where there is no more pain, hate or sorrow. I knew she was up there, but the way there was hard. Well probably for me anyway... what good things have I done? I don't recall anything horrible. "Olivia open up, you don't need to do this!" Jayson's voice vibrated against the closed door that held all the pain away. "Go away Jayson... it's too late." I cried as the knife stored away in my backpack came out, "You can thank Ally and Drake for this." I hiccupped trying to catch my breath, "I'm so, so sorry Jayson. Please forgive me." "You don't have to do this!" he sighed, "Can I tell you a secret Olivia?" "Make it quick..." "Olivia... Since you moved here, the reason I became your friend... Olivia Veronica Myers, the reason at times I'd act a little odd and would always be there for you was because I have feelings for you too." I paused, Jayson loved me? "But... why did you start dating Viviana? You loved her, didn't you?" "I did, but my intent for it was to make you jealous. Since you and Drake were dating I didn't think you liked me. I wanted you to be jealous of the fact that I had a girl. And the reason that I despised Drake and would ask if he was around was because I was jealous! I can't lie anymore! I LOVE YOU OLIVIA!" Shoving the knife back into my backpack I opened the door to a tear stained Jayson with his smile trying to emerge against the tears hat battled his body. "Do you really like me?" I asked gently. It had seemed that right now, at this moment, all the things wrong with me seemed to have disappeared. Like the death of Lily, my mother and father leaving me to fend for myself and then Drake and Ally... well you know the story. "I do Olivia... honest." "Prove it!" Immediately, he grabbed my broken hoof. His other hoof touched my tear stained face, his warm hoof seemed to take away all the pain I had all the way from me. In a split second, his lips met mine. The kiss was different, one that I had wished to feel since I was young, one of those kissed that felt like they would last through all eternity. I grabbed onto Jayson with both my hooves, I didn't want to let him go. Soon he pulled his face away from mine, his captivating smile appeared again without any struggle. With my hooves still wrapped around him, for once since all of this happened my fake smile became a real one. The pain that resided deep within me seemed to fade away like it was only a distant memory. "But wait... what about Ally and Drake?" I asked with my hands now holding his. "Who needs them. You have me and I have you, nothing and nobody is going to bother us. Whatever people say about you, I look at those as they are part of your beauty," Jayson responded, "Besides, you are made as you are. Nothing is going to change my opinion about you Olivia, I love you." For a long moment, Jayson and I stared at each other, it seemed like it was just him and I in this confounded world together. I loved it, this world seemed the one that I had always wanted. Was I trapped in a dream? Did I really die? Did I commit suicide in that bathroom? Was Lily still alive? Was I still dating Drake? Was Jayson dating Viviana still? "Olivia?" Jayson asked, "Are you okay?" "Am I dreaming this? Or am I already dead?" I questioned trying to get an answer. "No, you are very much alive and you aren't dreaming. Can I also ask you something?" "What is it?" "Would...would you...uh..." he stuttered with his eyes facing down and his head following behind it, "Would you go with me to the movies and dinner afterwards?" I smiled, but then it slowly disappeared, "I'd love to, but I don't think I have the money for it all. Since both my parents left me at home to completely fend for myself, I have nothing left over." "Don't worry about it. I'll pay, my treat, for my girl." Jayson grabbed my tear stained face gently and kissed my cheek, "So. Do you want to go?" I smiled, "Yes." Jayson grabbed my hand, I held onto his soul with every grip I had left. But that grip was getting stronger like Jayson was all I needed in my life. When we walked out of the room, there stood Ally with her hooves crossed against her tiny chest. "Oh look at that, you two are holding hooves." Ally teased. "Back off Ally, as much as I know that you liked me, I never want to be with a bitch like you. Olivia deserves my love, you have no respect from me anymore. Go ahead and make yourself proud and keep hating on her and I. It won't bother us anymore." Jayson snapped back, defending me like no other man had done before. Ally's mouth opened and she quickly turned around, falling into Drake's hooves. Jayson turned around just as soon as I did, his comforting eyes stared into mine. What Ally had said didn't seem to bother me the same way anymore, because of Jayson. I had been looking for a stallion, and I thought Drake was it. But I was mistaken, Jayson was my one and only...
