The April Fool's Day-centric Pony Personality Portrayal Test
It had to be something if it had awoken her. Cautiously Twilight Sparkle let an eye slide open to survey the ceiling of her room. Nothing revealed, she released the caught breath in her chest in the quietest of laughs, thinking, "at least nothing on this patch of the ceiling is out of the ordinary." Quite nearly in response something bustled in the library, making the sound of covers meeting. Something struck her. It was the first of April. The humans called it "April Fool's Day".
Porting a lit candle, Twilight descended the stairs into the main room. Light already skirted the steps, and a pony already was searching the room. The one on the stairs betrayed herself with a cross between a sigh and a groan.
"Pinkie, what are you doing here?"
Pinkie Pie halted in her search. Regarding Twilight, she responded in a quiet, yet chipper voice. "Oh, hi, Twilit, I didn't want to disturb you so I started looking for it myself."
"Looking for what?"
"An invisibility spell."
"Invisibility? Did Trixie send you?"
"No, I want to use it on myself for tomorrow. You see, if nopony can see me, they can't prank me. And also, if they can't see me, they can't protect themselves when I prank them! I didn't want you to cast it because you would know and that's one fewer pony I can exploit! But oh well, I can use you in my jokes tomorrow."
"But you're not a unicorn, how will you-" Her words were put back in the hat when a frosting-pink aura enveloped her friend. A spiked field materialized before her, depositing the pink magician on the steps. Twilight blinked repeatedly at the rapidly dissolving sparkles, moving to inspect Pinkie from every angle, mouth agape. First her sense, then this!
Pinkie could've clicked her fingers. She answered the silent question cheerfully, "I remember now, I haven't told you! Then again, gee, Twi, you're so smart I wonder why you hadn't seen it before. How else could I do everything I do? I've just hidden it because it makes a great mystery—and a surprise, and you know how much I love to use those!"
"That does explain a lot," mused Twilight.
"And you know what's even more of a surprise? This isn't even my final form!" At this the unicorn's pink color promptly lost ahold of her coat and mane, splashing onto the ground. They left her height un-restricted; she leapt for Twilight. In shock the other was struck silent, pressing her eyes shut as Pinkie's forehooves pinned her down. Silent too was Pinkie. An awkwardly silent moment ensued. Silence outside said the encounter went unnoticed. Sensing nothing to follow, Twilight opened an eye. A more mature voice welcomed her vision.
"Ha! Thou hast been fooled by this annual craft, Twilight Sparkle—these festivites have proven fun, forsooth!"
"Princess Luna," sighed Twilight as Luna stepped away, "happy April Fool's Day to you, too."
"Day? It is but night, our friend, thus constitutes April Fool's Night...a brew of our own. So we apologize for whatever sleep schedule we have disturbed, but the security of something obscure is at stake as we two speak."
"Oh, I get it. Have the Elements been turned into cupcakes?"
A stern, yet still kind look explained that Luna meant business. "This thing may be obscure but it is possibly not trivial."
"Alright, I'll be serious," resolved the younger. Wine-black swallowed the two therewith.
"They teleported. They just had to teleport," Spike told himself, motioning at the bucket of water on the library front door.
Only the penetrating cold broke their fall.
"We apologize," hastily apologized Luna, "teleporting underground remains an to us unrefined practice."
"Below ground..." Twilight lifted her head to look into her own eyes, a sight that sent her again into the air, a squeak leaping off her lips. Then—a thousand of them. Her reflections' gaze darted about until she realized, "we must be in the caves beneath Canterlot."
"Yes, we all are. Please take a seat."
"Good starfall, Twilight..."
"Starfall, sis..."
"Starfall? What's this about? Morning, everypony, by the way," said Twilight in response. By then she had calmly taken a spot amid the other leaders and...human? His specific reflection on the crystalline table repulsed Twilight. "Him again..." thought she.
"Starfall," introduced he, clearing his throat, "these are the hours between Collaborative Peak and Night's Surrender, numerically 0200 hours to 0400. Last summit, all the gangs elected that we use its encompassing standard. Here's the regulation..." At this he procured a small pamphlet. On its cover were laid in gold a myriad of loops and curls comprising an ancient script. From this he drew a length of scroll and a tiny black word on his fingertip. With a touch on the scroll he placed the word; immediately it began spreading into a dense block of prose. Twilight eventually tore the paper out and sent it through a portal.
"I already have a copy," dismissed she. Her words were dispelled by an opening from Luna, who began, "known is that this dawn, Night's Surrender, ports with it the human tradition of April Fools. Last year, when it was introduced, the lack of introduction coordination resulted in havoc for ponies everywhere. We plan to right it this year. Consequently, the Pacific Coast Mafia plans to wrong it." This particular human took his cue.
"At 1000 hours today the Pacific Coast Mafia will hold their much-awaited April Fool's Day Seminars for every town in Equestria. Obviously they have a monopoly on who staffs it. From evidence they are planning to exploit it. My personal timing in relaying this information is part of security through obscurity—it's I alone who has been investigating this. Hints at corruption began exactly a year ago. A handful of gangsters were taking notes on ponies' AFDs that weren't submitted. These same gangsters were missing from schedules and by my spying were nowhere to be found all at the same time, for five- to four-hours blocks. The minimum time was three-ish and a quarter hours; the consistent variation seemed attributable to commute time. Analyzing their cars and local traffic patterns, I could triangulate like fifteen super-broad sectors where they could meet, and I could not search all of them without raising any suspicion. Communications turned up clean: I could not get any more information, but the meetings continued. Announced liaison work regarding the seminars seemed off, and I could just taste those people's writing styles in the plans. They are planning something."
Twilight raised a hoof. "All this is from the Mafia. So are you. How do we know that you are not here literally to keep us from being there when maybe some other plan occurs?"
"Twilight, with all due respect, he is one of our operatives."
"Oh please, the Equestria Extralegal is part of the Coalition."
"That would imply we all are against ponykind," Princess Celestia asserted tersely, "...Twilight, if you remian unaware of the affiliations of different members of the Extralegal, I am sure that our human friend will be all but glad to review them for you. He has already contributed his part to this meeting."
"No, princess, that won't be necessary..."
As if nothing had occurred, the CEO of the F-Stop Gang speculated from there.
Author's Note
Okay, sorry if three of the characters are slightly darker/more corrupt than they truly should be (y-you can identify them, right?) and the background on this story is like *whoosh* over your heads.