Le Café de la Vie.

by AKA MrJ

Rating: everyone
Tags: Original Character, Discord, Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Alternate Universe, Human, Main 6, Other
Length: 4243

A new café has opened in Ponyville. It's run by a odd creature summoned there by Discord. Why? Well please come in and have a seat. Welcome to Le Café de la Vie!

(Warning. This is a self insert. Also my first post. Please keep all hatred to a two sentence minimum. Thank you.)

A new building has appeared in Ponyville.
With some encouragement from Discord, a human has opened a café.
What has motivated Discord this time and why did he toss a human into Equestra?
If anyone wants to see and learn about this new human, they'll have to go and see him at Le Café de la Vie.

Published 2015-04-05 16:40:02 UTC
Last updated 2015-04-15 23:36:00 UTC

Chapter 1

Author's Note

Okay second attempt to post something.
Please keep in mind that I have not chosen whose perspective this story will follow.
I realize that I will undoubtedly recive criticism for this story, and I politely ask that any destructive criticism or outright insults be posted without mercy.
Same goes for compliments and constructive criticisms.
-AKA MrJ

Chapter 1

Twilight Sparkle, Rainbow Dash, Rarity, Fluttershy, Pinkie Pie, and Apple Jack, had all agreed (much to Rarity's delight) to do a Sunday brunch. There had been some debate however, as to the location of where they brunch should be. Now it was Sunday and they still hadn't decided.

"Can't we just go to the castle?" Rainbow groaned. "It's almost lunch and I haven't eaten yet!"

"Now Rainbow Dash," Rarity said, "if you would simply be patient, we'll get something to eat soon."

"Hey! Why don't we just go there for breakfast-lunch!"

"Pinkie, it's called brunch. And where are we going?" Said Twilight

"To that brand new café over there," replied Pinkie with a wave of her hoof, "duh!"

The place Pinke had indicated was a three story building with the first floor consisting of six floor to ceiling tinted windows with a small entrance on the right of the building. The sign over the windows read "Le Café de la Vie." None of this would have stood out to the six ponies, if they had ever seen it before.

"Ah! A proper Prench café in Ponyville, oh this is wonderful!" Exclaimed Rarity. "Oh, we simply must go in."

"Now hold on there sugarcube," said Apple Jack, a tone of caution in her voice, "this wasn't here yesterday, so you'll excuse me if I think we shouldn't go in just yet."

"Nonsense darling, you're just worrying too much, now come along!" Rarity said, entering the café.

Without much of a choice, the other five ponies followed their friend into the cafe. The interior was as such, four booths lined the windows with a fifth, larger booth, placed at the far wall. Between the booths and the counter were three tables with two chairs each. The counter consisted of four stools, a dessert display, and a cash register. Fresh flowers sat in vases at the booths and tables. Each seat was set with a menu, clean white napkins, polished silverware, and a small plate. And the café as a whole was done up in tasteful red leathers,deep brown woods, and polished brass metals. A sign next to the door said "please seat yourself."

The whole café was empty, save for the six ponies who walked in. Rarity seemed unbothered by the lack of patrons or servers as she walked to the booth at the far end of the café motioning her friends to follow. Sliding into the booth each pony picking up a menu glancing it over as they eyed the rest of the café.

"Umm, shouldn't there be more ponies here?" Said the soft voice of Fluttershy. "I mean it's okay that it's not busy, but it is almost time for lunch."

"Fluttershy's right. Why aren't there more ponies in here," said Twilight, the alicorn wasn't even looking at here menu, instead looking at the counter, "you would think that a new café would've been bigger news a town like Ponyville."

This was true. With the recent edition of Twilight's castle, Ponyville had started to attract more ponies wanting to see the new princess. But since Ponyville was so small to begin with, any time that a new pony moved in or set up shop, the whole town would know about it. The fact that this café had appeared without anypony talking about it, had Twilight and the others a little worried.

"Darlings, you really must relax." Rarity chided. "It's a café, nothing to worried about. Listen, I can hear the waiter coming," it was true the could hear hoof steps coming from the back, "if you're really worried about this then you can ask him. Now. I see a Sunday special here that's going till noon. I think we should have tha-"

Rarity was cut short by the appearance of what could only be described as a monster. The thing stood upright on two legs and wore what appeared to be a waiter's uniform, consisting of a white shirt with a black vest, tie, and apron. It also wore some kind of denim pants and a kind of large black leather boot. From wasn't covered by cloth (it's head and fore paws) they could see pale pink skin, save for it's buzz-cut black mane, and five o'clock shadow. It must have poor eyesight since it also wore glasses. The creature then walked over to the six ponies who were still staring at it in shock, pulled out a pen and notepad from an apron pocket, offered a wide smile and said.

"Welcome to Le Café de la Vie! My name is Justin. May I take down any drinks before you order?"

Silence followed the question. The creature didn't seem at all shaken by the ponies staring at him (his deeper voice and five o'clock shadow marking him as male) "Justin" (as he called himself) simply stood there pen poised over pad, smile on his face, waiting to take down their orders. Finally it was Rarity who spoke up.

"Erm, yes we would like the 'taste of everything special' please." Her voice was shaking as she ordered.

"Excellent," said Justin, scribbling his notepad, "now will that be with tea or coffee?"

"Just tea I think."

"Alright then, will there be anything else?"

"Ooh!" Pinkie's hoof shot up as she spoke. "Can I get hot chocolate and the chocolate lava cake please!?"

"Okay," said Justin, once again making note of the order, "would anyone else like something besides the special?"

A round of 'no I think we're good' and 'no thank you's' was the general reply.

"Alright, I'll just take your menus than, thank you. Now I'll be right back with your orders." And with that Justin left. Silence followed after he left, nopony quite brave enough to speak. The silence was only broken by small sounds coming from the kitchen. After almost ten minutes did the ponies finally find their voices.

"What, was that thing?" Rainbow Dash's voice was shaking. "No. Seriously. What in Tartarus is that thing!?"

"He looked kind of like a ape thing to me." Pinkie's opinion was accompanied by a few giggles.

"H-he seemed very polite, I guess." Fluttershy's voice had risen to an almost inaudible squeak.

"Girls I think it be best if we left now." Apple Jack said with a tone of urgency.

"Leave without getting any chocolate!?" Pinkie said, looking at Apple Jack in shock. "Are you loco in the coco?!"

"Pinkie's right darlings," Rarity chimed in, "we should at least stay and try his cooking. After all it would be completely rude if we ordered and then ran off without paying the poor thing."

"But what if he's dangerous?" Apple Jack, shot back. "What do we do then, huh?"

"If he's dangerous we'll deal with him." Twilight said. "At the very least we give this thing a chance."

Their discussion ended there, as Justin entered carrying a tray in his right...paw. The ponies couldn't see what was since Justin was holding it at (his) head height, and he stood about 5'8" by Twilight's guess. (Most ponies stand around four feet tall mind you.)

"Here you are," said Justin his smile still present, "the 'taste of everything' special, one hot chocolate, and one chocolate lava cake."

And off the tray came five empty mugs, one mug filled with whipped cream and chocolate shavings, two tea pots, and three multi-tiered trays stacked with a variety of tarts, scones, cakes, and sandwiches. In front of Pinkie he placed a plate with what looked like two chocolate cupcakes with sliced strawberries on the side. Justin's smile seemed to brighten at the ponies awe of the spectacle he had set in front of them.

"Please enjoy, and call if there is anything else you need" with that Justin retread into the back. Silence once again following him.

"Well," Twilight said, picking up a sandwich in her magic, "let's dig in."

The late brunch seemed to last forever. Each pony lost in their little world as they tasted the meal in front of them. Excited exclamations bounced back and forth over each new item, encouragements to try one of the tarts, or attempts to hog all of one kind of cake. They were all so engrossed in the meal that they forgot any fears from earlier. Once again they were six friends enjoying themselves. They were still chatting and giggling when Justin reappeared to clear the table, the ponies barely noticed, only to thank him for bringing the check, which Rarity picked up saying it was her treat.

"Okay so he ain't dangerous," Apple Jack said, bringing the attention back to her and the earlier topic of Justin, "but I still want to know what he is."

"Oh. You don't think it's rude to ask?" Said Fluttershy, her voice had returned to it's normal tone during the meal. "I don't want to upset him by being rude."

"Nonsense," said Twilight, the alicorn visibly becoming excited at the idea of learning something new, "I think it's important to know about anypony whose operating a business in Ponyville. Especially since his business never went through town hall, or me, or the bank, or anypony in Ponyville. Actually how did he get this building up and running in the middle of the night, without anypony noticing?"

"Well, why don't we ask," said Rarity, raising a hoof, "garçon, s'il vous plaît!"

Almost instantly Justin was at their booth, all smiles and eagerness.

"Yes madam? How may I be of service?"

"Ahem, yes me and my friends were just wondering if you tell us about you and your café." Rarity said.

"Yes of course. What would like to know?" Said Justin, pulling up a chair from the nearby table.

"Well for starters you can tell us who in hay you are." Said Apple Jack, not even trying to hide her suspicion of Justin.

"W-well like I said before I'm Justin," he said, showing signs of nervousness for the first time, "I'm seventeen, and this is my café."

"And how did you get here exactly?"

"Well a few months back my buddy Discord came to me and-"

"Your friends with Discord!!" Shouted everypony in disbelief making Justin nearly fall out of chair in surprise.

"Um, yah. I'm friends with Discord, why is that surprising?" Justin asked.

"Erm. It's just, we didn't, expect, umm, p-please continue darling." Said Rarity.

"Well like I was saying, Discord came to me a few months ago looking about as depressed as a person can get. I ask what's wrong, and he tells me about how he feels like he lost the trust and friendship he had built with some people named. Gods I can never remember names. Okay he mentioned someone called...Fluttershy, and he talked about someone named Tia... Anyway the names aren't important right now. What's important is that he made a mistake and betrayed them to some demon or other. Then after the demon betrays Discord, Discord realizes his mistakes, try's to help his friends, they beat the demon, and they say he's forgiven. Mostly."

"So after he comes to me and asks for my help in resolving his troubles, and to help him regain the friendships he once had."

"Hold up," said Rainbow Dash, "Discord, spirit of chaos, came to you, for therapy."

"Well more like he came came to me for advice." Said Justin.

"And just how did that lead you too coming here?" Questioned Apple Jack.

"I'm getting to that part." Said Justin. "See, Discord was telling me how he went a picnics with this girl Fluttershy, and I bring up the idea that a good way to start apologizing is over a meal. That's when Discord gets the idea to build me this cafe. I'm not sure how he came to this idea, but I went with it. So after some long discussions with my parents and teachers. They agreed to let me come here and try running my own cafe. I think discord has the idea that I can somehow magic things better by cooking for his friends. But either way, I'm here now ready to put my skills to the test, and help Discord. Still not sure how, but hey it's Discord. If we understood him than he'd be doing his job wrong."

The mane six just stared at Justin, a mix of disbelief and shock adorned most of their faces. For Justin it was hard to tell what these ponies were thinking, his smile wavering.

"Well thank you for time and thanks for the meal." Said Twilight, ushering her friends out the booth and towards the door.

"My pleasure," said Justin, standing up placing his chair back, "and thank you for dining at Le Café de la Vie."

Chapter 2

It had been an interesting week for Justin. He had successfully moved out of his parents house, opened up his own café, and met with the mane 6. Who were apparently some of the most important ponies in the country. And more importantly! Yesterday Justin had helped Discord take the first step to reconcile with his friends, or at least with Fluttershy. Personally Justin thought that discord had made it unnecessarily harder on himself, but Justin wasn't here to criticize Discord (at least not quite yet) he was here to help. It had taken a lot more encouraging than needed on Justin's part. Discord had been...nervous to say the least.

"I can't do this," Discord said fidgeting on the stool. He was sitting at the counter of Le Café de la Vie with Justin standing on the other side arranging what he called the coffee station. Other patrons were shooting nervous glances at the Discord, which was doing nothing to help calm the jittery draconequus.

"We've been over this Discord," Justin said turning to face his friend, "you're meeting with Fluttershy here and you are going to voice any self doubts you have. And stop bringing your silverware to life! It's making my other customers nervous!"

"Hmff, self doubts." Discord said, snapping his eagle claw making the previously tap dancing spoon drop back onto the countertop. "I'm the master of chaos and disharmony! Why would I ever doubt myself?"

Justin's only response was raise an eyebrow in question.

"Well, maybe I've had some ridiculous thoughts but.." Discord said.

Justin remained silent, his disbelief only becoming more apparent.

"I mean sure I've made some decisions that needed some reconsidering..."

Again Justin remained silent, only adding a deeper frown to his disbelieving look.

"Okay fine!" Said Discord, collapsing onto the counter. "I'm a nervous wreck right now and I have every reason to question and doubt everything I've done over the last month. Happy?"

"Very." Said Justin, grinning widely. "Now straighten up, here she comes."

Discord had shot bolt upright when Fluttershy walked in, straightening up to the point of being almost as stiff as a board. Justin had had some worries about this. From what he understood of the situation, this was something Discord hadn't had a lot of experience doing, telling a friend what bothered him. When Discord had first told Justin about his troubles, he had danced around the subject until Justin had forcibly dragged it out. It was further worrying that to Justin that Discord had come to him with the problem instead of one his pony friends. It wasn't that Justin was unwilling to help, he did get his own café after all, but it did tell him a lot about his friend.

"Good afternoon Discord," Fluttershy said in her usual quiet voice, "thanks for inviting me to lunch."

"Hmm? Oh! Um, thank you for joining us-we-me." Discord said trying and failing to hide his nervousness. Fortunately Fluttershy didn't seem to notice.

"And good afternoon to you too Justin, how are you settling in?"

"Just fine thanks for asking," Justin said with his ever present smile, "Discord has been helping me out. Oh! Before I forget, I've got a new item that I think the two of you will like."

"New items? Are you expanding your menu?"

"Maybe. Wait here I'll go get it." And with that Justin went into the back leave Discord and Fluttershy alone. Really he had simply stepped out of sight of Discord and Fluttershy so he could spy on the conversation but they didn't need to know that.

"It was nice of you to invite me to lunch Discord," said Fluttershy, "we haven't really seen each lately, with you being so busy."

"Your welcome Fluttershy," Discord said, "I'm so sorry for my being so absent it's just-"

"Oh no need to apologize. I know that you would have come spent time with us if you had been able to."

"U-us?"

"Yes. Me, and Twilight, and Pinkie, and everyone. We never really had the chance for all of us to spend time together."

"Yes I suppose I should make time to spend with my...friends."

"Discord? If you don't mind me asking, is there something wrong?"

"Weeell. You see-"

"Y-yes?"

"I'm...just not sure...about us being...friends."

Fluttershy looked at Discord with shock. This had confused Justin. He had already told the mane six about Discord's thinking so why was Fluttershy shocked? It was only afterwards did he realize that hearing it come directly from Discord must hold a different kind of meaning than hearing it from someone she barely knew.

"It-it's not that I don't want to be your friend!" Discord said quickly. "It's just that. I'm not really. I mean I-"

"It's okay. I know what you're trying to say." Fluttershy said, "You're still upset about Tirek."

"...yes."

"It's okay Discord, you're already making up for it by being our friend."

"...thank you Fluttershy."

Justin decided to interrupt here. Grabbing the aforementioned treat before heading back into the dining area.

"Sorry for the wait," said Justin, "I thought it best to give this new idea a bit more time."

Yesterday's progress had been good. Justin wasn't entirely sure how much progress had been made, but he could only be so helpful when environment is all you could provide at the moment. But that worry would have to wait till tomorrow, at the present he had one last chore before turning in. Stepping outside, Justin went to the window and taped a 'help wanted' sign to it. If Le Café de la Vie was going to stay open, he would need more workers.

Chapter 3

Today started off well enough. Despite needing to close Le Café de la Vie for today, Justin was confident that he would be open again tomorrow, hopefully with some new employees. But for now a trip to the markets was needed. Justin hadn't really gotten the chance to explode Ponyville despite being here for eight days, hell he had barely stepped outside in those eight days, so really this trip had multiple goals. One of the goals was to get the resident ponies get used to his presence, some of the stares he was getting were making him uncomfortable.

Glancing over the shopping list, Justin was very happy with himself for thinking ahead and bringing a cart. This feeling dampened slightly when he heard (and felt) someone jump into the back.

"Hiya! Whatcha doin!?" came the ever hyperactive voice of Pinkie Pie.

"Morning Pinkie, I'm grocery shopping," Justin said, "I need to restock everything after being open for seven days straight."

"Cool! Can I come? Pleeease?"

"Pinke, it's just shopping, not really the most exciting thing to do. But if you want to, you're more than welcome to join me."

"Yay! Can we stop at A.J's?"

"That's actually my first stop, why?"

"Because I still haven't given her an invitation to your party tonight! Duh!"

Justin stopped walking. To the extent of his knowledge he couldn't remember any reason for someone to throw him a party. Hell he'd never even been to a party that didn't revolve around a holiday or birthday. Plus this was the first time he had of this.

"Pinkie," Justin asked, "what party, and why wasn't I told about it?"

"Because it's a surprise party!" Pinkie said, apparently ignoring the fact that she just ruined the surprise, "if I told you about it than that would just ruin the surprise."

"But you just did."

"Did what?"

"You just told me."

"Told you about what?"

"About the surprise party!"

"What!? How did you find out!?"

Justin sighed and resumed his walk, deciding it would be easier to not answer Pinkie. Arriving at the marketplace he immediately made his way over to Applejack's stand. Applejack was unloading the last of her cart when Justin and Pinke approached.

"Morning A.J." Pinkie half said half shouted.

"Morning Pinkie, morning Justin. What can I do for ya?" greeted Applejack.

"Good morning, Applejack," said Justin, looking over his shopping list, "let's see, I'm gonna need a barrel."

"Sure! That'll be twenty-five bits."

"Alright." Justin said pulling a coin purse out of his cart, counting out the coin.

"Hey, aren't you going to haggle a bit?" asked Pinkie.

"No Pinkie, I am not." Justin said, handing Applejack the bits, "There are only times I would haggle with someone is if I was, a). At an auction house. b). Negotiating a business transaction. Or c). Calling out a vender for ripping me off."

"Ohhh. So that means you trust A.J. to be fair with you. Right?"

"...Right."

"Well thanks sugarcube." said Applejack.

"You're welcome." Justin said, loading his barrel onto the cart, "Thanks for the apples. See ya."

"See ya'll later"

The rest of the trip went well, he even had more change than expected. Although Justin suspected that some of the good deals had been given to him due to ponies wanting him to go away. Still, he was done shopping quickly, he might even have some free time before tonight's party. As Justin approached Le café de la Vie, he saw a line of ponies waiting for him. This was strange since he had put up a "closed for Sunday" sign up, until he remembered the second sign saying "interviews at one o'clock." Counting thirteen ponies, then counting thirty-two seats in the café Justin got an idea on how to get this out of the way quickly.

"Can have your attention please!" Justin shouted, "anyone here for a job, please wait while I unload the cart. Anyone here who is not looking for work, please come back in an hour."

Nobody moved.

"Alright then wait a moment and I'll be right with you all."

Looking over the half filled seats Justin wondered if he should have done this differently.

"Alright all eyes on me." Justin said with all the authority he could, "Now I am going to be as clear as I can. Anyone who commits to working here will be starting at six-thirty, and ending at nine. I don't need anybody who can't work full time. If you show up tomorrow, you'll be working the front of the house. Waiting and bussing tables, dishwashing, taking out trash, running errands, etcetera. Make it a few days doing that, I might start letting you into the kitchens."

"If you show up tomorrow I expected you to work. That means being on your feet- hooves from start to finish. Now I can't hire all of you, but I can give you all a chance IF, and only if you put forth your best efforts. Now are there any questions?"

A hoof was raised, it's owner a pale blue pegasus who asked,

"What's the pay?"

"Twelve bits per day," Justin answered, "that's the minimum. Bonuses are given accordingly. Any other questions?"

Nopony answered.

"Right then. See you here six-thirty tomorrow morning."

Leaning back into his couch Justin, looked over his mail which he had neglected all week. Granted it was only three letters, but he should have read them earlier. The first one was an invitation to the Sugarcube Corner later. No doubt what that was. The next letter was from home. It wasn't easy sending letters between worlds but it was doable. Provides you had a reality bending God as a friend. The letter was mostly about how much his family missed him, and about how his siblings finally got their tattoos. Justin set the letter to the side mentally composing a response letter. He was snapped out of this thought as he read the final letter. Reading, than re-reading, it remained the same.

"Dear Justin.

I thought it best to write ahead rather than surprise you. At the invitation of our shared friend Discord, my sister and myself shall be joining him Monday, April 13th, for lunch at your restaurant, Le Café de la Vie.
I look forward to our meeting.

-Celestia.

P.S.
I'm especially looking forward to the cake."

Well. Now Justin was stuck, April 13th was tomorrow, and if he was to impress the princesses. Correction. Help Discord. That meant starting tonight, or going to bed early and getting up early. But that meant missing tonight's party. Justin sighed, standing up and heading to the bedroom.

"Good thing I don't like parties that much" he muttered.

Chapter 4

Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.