Beyond the Glass: Discord and Pinkie's Chaotic Adventures

by Gear Grinder

Rating: everyone
Tags: Comedy, Random, Adventure, Discord, Pinkie Pie, Crossover, Alternate Universe, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 9840

Discord discovers the 4th wall. With Pinkie's help, they embark on many short adventures. Celestia save us.

Have you ever wondered if you're being watched? Like someone has a screen that looks into your world, viewing you at all of your most private moments? When Discord accidentally discovers this screen, he's determined to discover what lies beyond it. Luckily, a certain pink party pony has plenty of experience with this particular screen. Together, they venture beyond Equestria, the galaxy, and even beyond dimensions. These are the short stories of Pinkie Pie and Discord as they travel beyond the 4th wall and discover just who and what their viewers are.

Published 2015-04-09 14:10:03 UTC
Last updated 2015-04-24 05:59:18 UTC

Chapter 1: What is this thing?

Summer. Never was there a more perfectly harmonious and peaceful time of the year than summer. Young ponies played in the streets, the elders sat on their porches reading the papers, and Celestia's sun was in just the right place at the right time at just the right temperature: Noon and 80 degrees Fahrenheit. Just enough to get the blood going, but not to boil. Plants had unfurled their leaves and petals to absorb as much nutrients as possible, and the soil was just right for spreading their roots. Few clouds populated the sky, just enough to provide a short respite of shade. Hummingbirds and bees flitted around busily collecting pollen for food, enjoying the sweet delicious flavors of every flower they came across. Some of the local pets were about as well, as Opal spread herself out in front of the boutique to take in the warmth. Winona ran and played with Tank, who flew through the sky with his little enchanted propeller. Gummi.... did whatever it is Gummi does, while Angel Bunny darted about the carrot patches over by Sweet Apple Acres, swiping whatever carrots he could.

Truly a perfect day.

A perfect. BORING. Day.

Discord sat at a wooden table at a local diner, fiddling with a construct made of plasma he had conjured into existence when he sneezed a short while ago. He made it take on the form of a cat, and the creature bounced and pounced on plasma-mice and ate them, making it bigger with every morsel devoured. Soon the cat was too big to fit the table, toppling it over and falling to the ground. The impact of the plasma caused a small crater in the ground, sending sparks and dirt exploding towards the surrounding area. He quickly manifested an umbrella and covered himself from being sprayed by the debris. After a few seconds, he lowered the umbrella to see what had happened. To his right the window leading in to the diner was totally destroyed, shards of glass scattered everywhere. The table had exploded into small bits of wood, and the ground where the plasma-cat had landed had left a crater big enough to fit a full grown Manticore. Thankfully no pony was hurt from the incident, though the diners manager came out with a cleaver and a look of pure rage. With a snap of his talons, he quickly repaired the damage (as annoying as it was) and made himself scarce. He left a note on the table that said "My bad!" and a few bits that had his handsome muzzle imprinted on them, giving a thumbs up and a wink. A small compensation for damage done, then undone.

He poofed next to a lightpost a couple of miles away, near Sugar Cube Corner. He wiped his brow with an over-exaggerated sigh of relief, wiping off a small flood of sweat and drenching the lightpost in salt water. He turned around to walk back towards Fluttershy's cottage. It was nearly lunch time, and he had promised to make a nice meal for her. Perhaps a Caesar salad? Maybe a nice squash and orzo? He'd decide later, when he felt more in the mood to think. He took a few steps forward before he felt a sudden chill up his spine. He turned around in all directions, wondering if old Sunbutt had come to scold him about the incident.

"Who's there?" he called out. He extended the length of his neck thrice fold, to get a better view of his surroundings. No pony was anywhere near him. The closest ones were those Crusader fillies, and they were a good thirty feet away. Besides, nothing they could do could make him cautious of his surroundings. He was an immortal capable of conjuring anything out of nothing, making himself anything he wanted with a simple thought, capable of going anywhere without a trace! So what was bothering him so much? He retracted his neck to it's original position, scoffing at the idea that something had gotten him so riled up so easily. He continued walking forward a few steps, his head looking behind him.

Suddenly, he bumped into something. Assuming it was a pony, he put on his nicest fake smile and turned to apologize.

"I'm so very sorry for bumping into-" he looked ahead, then down, then up. Again, nothing was there. He stroked his beard with a hint of curiosity. An invisible barrier? He blinked at where he thought it was, using his magic to dispel it's disguise. Nothing appeared before him. He blinked again. Nothing. He kept blinking until he felt like he was in one of DJ-PON3's weekend strobe-light raves, but nothing appeared before him no matter how many times his lids moved.

Hesitantly, he extended his lion's paw towards the area in front of him. Sure enough, it came into contact with something. Something very cold. So cold, in fact, he had to retract his paw as the frost suddenly covered his fur. He shook the paw in fear, attempting to remove the sudden chill. Oddly though, there was no pain in his paw at all. No chill, no burning, not even a single trace of frost on his fur. He hummed in contemplation, stroking his scraggly beard in thought. What was this thing? When did it get here? Did anypony else know about it?

He shrugged, them immediately felt the urge to smash this wall that had caused him to actually think. He manifested a sledgehammer into his paw and claw then raised it mightily into the air. Inhaling and holding his breath, he began to swing with all his might. Just before the tip connected with the barrier, everything froze in place, including him. He opened an eye to see what had happened. Hesitantly, he let go of the hammer. It stayed suspended in the air, frozen in time and space. The barrier remained unharmed, still translucent and unseen without so much as a crack in it.

He stared at the hammer, then the wall. Something was going on here, and he had absolutely nothing to do with it. This had to be some kind of magic. Perhaps Twilight had found him and stopped time to prevent him from doing any harm to some project of hers? Maybe Celestia really had shown up to scold him? Whatever it was, he felt the presence of somepony behind him. It wasn't a princess, that was for sure. He would have felt their magical essence the minute they came within a mile of him. No other unicorn he knew of was powerful enough to do something of this caliber, and that left him with no other choices for who it was.

He turned to face his intruder, and stopped short when he saw it was only Pinkie Pie. She stood completely still, staring straight at where Discord was. He walked towards her, and she still remained completely motionless. She hadn't been there a few second ago, he knew that. He lowered his head to her face to inspect her more closely. She looked, surprisingly, serious. No, it was more than that. She looked... authoritative? Pfft. Like this pony has any actual authority. Discord thought.

"I have much more power than you think, Discord."

He fell back on his tail, totally taken aback. She had spoken? How? Time had clearly stopped around them, yet she walked towards him and continued to speak! How was this possible?

"It's always so funny to see someone so shocked when they come across The Wall." Pinkie said. "They always think that it's some kind of ghost or something, but I always make sure they never come across this place again."

Discord stood up straight, wiping the dust off of him with feather dusters he had willed into existence. "What is all of this, Pinkie Pie? What is this wall that you're talking about?"

She raised a hoof, shaking it in a tut-tut manner. "Nuh-uh, Discord. It's not a wall. It's The Wall."

"That's what I said! The wall!"

Pinkie shook her head. She then went back a few sentences to - hey, wait a minute. What're you... oh, nevermind. She want back a few sentences to grab the words "The Wall" that I typed, then placed them in front of Discord.

"No. See? It's a proper noun, so you need to type it like this. The Wall". She leaned against the words and waited for Discord to comply. He looked around, slightly confused.

"The wall?" She shook her head. "THE WALL?"

"Now you're just caps locking your sentence." He was totally lost. "I mean, you were just shouting your sentence."

The word shouting appeared from her hooves in an arc, italicized. Not questioning how she managed that, he tried once again.

"The.... Wall?"

Pinkie clapped her hooves excitedly, then turned Discord around to see The Wall. Slowly but surely, an actual wall manifested into existence. It was glass, about 20 feet across in length. Beyond the glass was -

"HA! HE SAID IT!"

What? What did I say, Pinkie?

"Nothing, don't worry. Continue typing, sir!"

Anyway, beyond the glass seemed to be a black void of pure nothingness, as if all things known to Equestria did not exist beyond this door.
Discord looked down to the pink pony is disbelief. She looked up like an expectant kitten.

"So, what exactly IS this thing?" Discord said.

Pinkie sat Discord down into a chair that hadn't been there before, then brought out an easel and sketchpad canvas that was from somewhere. Her graduation cap settled onto her head from someplace unknown, and she began her explanation.

"Okay. So imagine this is us." She flipped over the front page to reveal a live camera feed of them in the exact positions they were standing or sitting in. Discord turned around to see if there was even a camera there, but there was nothing there but The Wall. The Discord inside of the picture turned around, and so did the Discord in the picture's picture. An infinite amount of Discords turned to see what was spying on them, but there was nothing except everything, nothing and The Wall.

"But that IS us. That is literally us!" He pointed at the screen, and so did the other Discords.

"Yeah, it is! Now you're getting it!" She slapped a gold star next to a picture of him that was never there.

"Now, pay attention. THIS is where it gets confusing!" He rolled his eyes.

"Now, imagine we're watching a different world through this screen." She pointed towards the aisle. The pictures' feed changed to something else, revealing a location completely new to him. Strange creatures walked around on their hind legs, covered in clothing and looking strangely familiar to the denizens of Equestria. One particular creature turned to face to camera, and waved whilst jumping up and down. It looked just like Pinkie Pie, but slightly less pink and in garish attire even for his taste.

"Is that a different world?" His curiosity piqued. If there were alternate worlds and alternate versions of creatures in Equestria, surely there must be one of him, as well.

"Yeah, but we'll get to that another day. What I'm trying to tell you is that beyond The Wall," She pointed a hoof towards The Wall, "Are so many different worlds, places, things, ponies, people, and other things that I don't think your mind can handle just yet."

He scoffed. Then scoffed again. He then started guffawing, chortling, hooting, lol-ing, rofl-ing and any other sort of creative way of laughing there is to do in all of creation. He got up from the ground, wiping away tears of pure joy.

After catching his breath, he faced the pink Earth Pony. "Oh my, Pinkie Pie. That was the funniest thing I've ever heard. You clearly don't remember who I am and what I do, so let me teach YOU a lesson or two!"

"Teehee! That rhymed." Pinkie piped.

"Indeed." He said dryly. "I am DISCORD. Chaos itself, made manifest through my own willpower and desire for entertainment. I can create anything, anywhere, anytime." He leaned in close to her face. "That also means I can DESTROY anything, anywhere, anytime."

"True." Pinkie said, booping the draconequus on the nose. "But think about this for a second. If you break that wall, you'll be making this show boring by having ponies constantly acknowledge the audience!"

"Exactly! I- wait, what?" For the audience? He knew he was being watched by something. It wasn't until he had encountered The Wall before it was confirmed.

Pinkie nodded. "The audience! The people who watch the show! You know, fans?"

"I have fans? Ponies actually like me?"

"Well, not ponies exactly. They're humans, to be more precise."

Humans? He HAD heard of such things, but only because Lyra Heartstrings never shut her trap about it.

"So what you're saying is that everypony in Ponyville has fans, they watch us on a daily basis, and they actually have a vested interest in our daily lives?"

Pinkie nodded at Mach 5. "Yup! Now you understand!" She jumped up and hugged the draconequus, making him lose his breath. He manifested himself a few feet away from her to catch his breath, then turned to face The Wall.

"Have you... you know, gone past it?" He turned his head to her. "The Wall, I mean."

"Oh yeah, ALL the time. I also like to look into it, talk to it, and even go to other places I'm... kinda not supposed to." She rubbed her hooves together at that, looking nervous.

"Places?" He queried. "What places?"

"Well... there's this thing called The Internet. It's a giant web of universes connected to one another, and they all have their own version of The Wall to protect them." She looked around hesitantly before continuing in a hushed whisper. "Hasbro doesn't know I know about it, because I've been really careful."

"Hasbro? Whats-"

She slapped a hoof over his mouth. "SHH!"

Silence passed. More silence. Even more.

She breathed a sigh of relief. "Good. The author didn't notice it."

Notice what?

Pinkie turned towards The Wall and spoke. "Nothing! Carry on!"

Umm..... okay then? Pinkie continued. "So, since you think your capable enough, wanna come with me?"

Discord was utterly confused, which was an incredibly rare feat. To go beyond existence, yet exist in a non-existential plane of existence to travel to other existences and exist in another existence?

"Sure. Why not?" He shrugged.

Pinkie squeed in delight like a squeaky toy. She grabbed Discord's lion paw and dragged him to The Wall. She placed his paw on It and held it there, looking incredibly giddy to show him her semi-private little world. Discord grew worried once more as the effects of the door covered his paw, but it was strangely warmer now. Almost welcoming. He even began to giggle a bit at how the warmth enveloped his body, almost like slowly settling in on a lava bath while being tickled by cockatrice feather at the same time. Pinkie placed her hooves on The Wall as well, giggling alongside the draconequus. Slowly they both began to slip through The Wall and stop existing in Ponyville, time still halted in that reality.

The Wall had welcomed them. Their adventures had only just begun.

Chapter 2: "Bridal" First Impressions

Pinkie floated forward giggling, doing a breaststroke into the nothingness that was everything. Discord slithered around behind her, looking around at all there was to see.

If there was anything to see.

He blinked a couple of times to make sure he hadn't been duped. No, there truly was nothing here. All around him was a colossal amount of nothing, with a small side of boring silence and a glass of confusion. He drank the confusion, then spat it out when he realized it was far too tart for his taste. The boring silence didn't taste too good either. It was like reheated leftovers from two days ago; devoid of almost all flavor, yet just enough to keep you curious to try and find more flavor by eating more food.

Pinkie turned around mid-air like a graceful swordfish in an underwater ballet. "What's wrong?"

"There's nothing here!" He extended his arms for emphasis, about twenty feet or so. His eagle claw hit something and it resonated with a clang, like cymbals on concrete. The thing rotated and revealed itself to be a large square of glass. Pinkie used her tail like a propeller to float over and catch the glass and rotate it back into position, slapping away Discord's claw like a petulant child. After she settled the pane back into place, she floated back to see a relatively annoyed draconequus.

"What was that for?!" He growled slightly. It wasn't until then that he noticed the echo of the colossal subspace. It made the "spectacle" seem all the more boring and empty.

Pinkie huffed. "You need to learn to respect your surroundings, Discord. You nearly broke that screen and caused a catastrophe!" When he started to grin maliciously, she immediately added "and you don't want to do that! Not HERE, anyway."

"Why not here? There's nopony who'd be hurt by it, anyway."

She slowly waved her hoof across the vastness of the void. "Wrong. If you did that, you'd hurt EVERYTHING and EVERYONE." When he raised a quizzical eyebrow, she wrapped her foreleg around Discord's neck as the floated forward towards another large pane of glass. Pinkie pushed her hoof against a part of it, and the immediate area around her hoof lit up like a blue light, revealing a small window with different colored panes. The screen flickered to show grey and white fuzz before coming into focus, revealing what lied beyond.

***

A young human girl sat at her desk, not looking at her black screen but instead staring at the paper that lied before her. She had been given a commission by a client who wanted a picture of Discord holding an upside-down umbrella, but for some reason her mind couldn't remember the image. She didn't want to look up the actual image as reference, as she saw that as cheating. She preferred to do her art from her own creativity and her own memory. Her ceiling fan buzzed over her while her cat sauntered around her legs like scratching posts, expecting it's hourly dose of praise. Sure enough, she bent down to pet the small creature, its purring resonating in its throat in shear delight.

She suddenly heard the start-up jingle for her computer, which was enough to raise an eyebrow but not investigate. She kept playing with the small feline, the cat lying on it's belly and stretching it's pink little paws in it's owners reverence. After a few more seconds, the cat sat up and sauntered away to it's little cat house, settling in nicely to one of the alcoves and closing it's eyes in exhaustion. Being great was so much of a chore.

The girl turned her head around again, and her eye caught on to the previous pieces she had done. She looked fondly on the sketch of Vinyl Scratch at her DJ booth she had made last week, remembering how much DeadMau5 she had listened to whilst drawing her. Next to her was Octavia playing her Cello, and memories of Vivaldi, Chopin, and Bach came to her. She closed her eyes in reminiscence, sighing in satisfaction at how well they both had turned out. She wasn't one to brag, but she absolutely loved the piece. It showed her best efforts and reflected the amount of love and care it took to dedicate the time and energy to make it.

After wiping away a small tear of satisfaction, she turned back towards her computer to see how it had started up on its own. She froze, unsure if what she saw was a part of a dream or actually happening. She rubbed her eyes, blinked multiple times, then focused her vision back on the screen. No change. None at all.

There, right before her on her desktop, was Pinkie Pie. Pinkie Pie and Discord, standing on her taskbar like it was a train platform.

She immediately starting doing a virus check, to see if these things were some sort of joke. The window for Norton Anti-Virus popped open, and it blocked the images of Pinkie and Discord. To her dismay, Discord only shoved the Anti-Virus window out of the way, and it bounced against the left side of her screen. He folded his arms and huffed, clearly annoyed. Pinkie Pie, however, started giggling.

The girl started to panic. No program she knew of was advanced enough to physically move a window, unless it was her cursor? She wiggled her mouse around to make sure, and it moved around in the upper right hand corner of the screen. It hand't been that, so what was it?

The Pinkie Pie on her screen moved over to the bottom right of her screen, getting bigger and bigger. The girl backed away, thinking it was one of those "screamers" her friends in school told her about. The Pinkie on her computer pressed the volume control, unmuting the computer and allowing audio to flow out.

"- incredibly rude of her. I mean, REALLY. We're guests and she- Oh hey, I can talk." Discord grumbled. Pinkie giggled once again. Discord sauntered forward, pressing his face against the screen. He sprung back right away as his entire muzzle turned white and was covered with frost. He shook it off, irritated and confused.

"So THIS is one of those humans you were talking about, Pinkie?" He gestured his paw towards the screen, and the girl behind it. "It doesn't look like much, really. Kind of like that Chimpanzee I rode that one time." The girl was annoyed and wanted to yell at him, but realized it would serve no purpose considering it was a program or virus.

"Hey! Don't be so rude, Discord!" She also gestured towards the girl. "She's a pretty big fan of ours, you know! She writes stories about our universe regularly and shares them with the rest of her world!"

He placed his arms on his hips. "It doesn't matter if they're no good."

"Here, let me show you how good they are!"

Pinkie hopped on to the nearest folder labeled "Unfinished Art", then climbed up a few other folders until she reached one labeled "Completed Stories". She reached in with her tail, fishing for a story. She whipped up her tail after a few minutes, then threw a book down to Discord. The book was a brown, leather-bound hardcover with a picture on the front. Discord stared at the cover, then immediately blushed and stared at the girl through the screen. She looked around awkwardly, as if caught doing something wrong. Discord opened the book, flipping through the pages and examining the contents. He began muttering to himself, saying things like "Uh-huh" or "Ugh, really?" After a while, towards the end of the book. He slammed it shut, sweating. He opened up a pocket in the side of his fur, and put the book in it.

Pinkie reached in and pulled the book out, saying "Discord, what're you doing? We can't take things from other creatures like that! It's stealing!" Then SHE looked at the cover, and began laughing hysterically.

"BRIDE OF DISCORD?" She practically screamed mid-laughter. Discord folded his arms, looking away and blushing furiously, so much so that steam poured out from his closed jaw and ears. He made a bucket of cool water pour over his head, and his blush diminished. He picked up the book again, and looked at the girl. Never, in any history book, work of fiction, or any stained glass mural or portrait, had anypony - no... had anyone matched his personality so perfectly.

It bothered him. Immensely.

"You there, human." He pointed at the screen, walking close enough to be within arms reach of it. "Who are you? How do you know so much about us, about ME?" He held the book aloft, motioning to it. "What did you hope to achieve while writing this?"

The girl sat, silently stunned. She stayed that way until Discord pounded on the glass with his paw with all of his might, making a tiny crack in the glass. Pain be damn, the draconequus needed an answer. Pinkie recovered from her laughter, and made a motion to the abstract spirit. She stopped mid step though, when Discord took a couple steps back from the glass and waited.

"Umm..." the girl said. She found this too bizarre to be really happening, but she spoke anyway. "It's... it's because, well, I'm such a big fan of yours. Even when you were a bad guy, I knew you had to be lonely. So I figured... I figured even you needed someone, you know... someone to love you." She raised her hands up, defensively. "I'm sorry if it bothers you, honestly. If I had known I could get your opinion on it, I... I don't know, I wouldn't have made it."

Discord remained silent, thinking on what his observer had said. After a few minutes he looked down at the book cover again, then he spoke. "You wrote a sequel to this, right?"

She nodded.

"What happens in that one?"

The girl stayed silent. She answered very slowly and hesitantly, making sure her answer was to his liking. "I.... I can't tell you."

He growled, holding up the book and shaking it. "And WHY NOT?!"

"Because.... it'd.... it'd ruin the surprise?"

He stared. She stared back. Pinkie stood up straight, ready to intervene if needed. Silence encompassed the screen and the room for what seemed like forever.

Five minutes passed. Ten.

"Keep up the good work." He finally said. He then put the book into his pocket, turning around and saying, "I'm going to borrow this for a while."

The girl nodded, saying "Okay", very quietly.

Discord looked down on the pink Earth Pony. "Let's go, Pinkie."

She smiled warmly first at the girl, then at Discord. "Oki Doki Loki!" She said with a bounce in her steps. She pushed the window on the bottom left hand corner of the screen, and the pink pony pressed the power button with her hoof. Oddly enough, the computer did not shut down. A door did open in the background, though, and Discord opened it and waited for Pinkie.

She turned to the girl, smiling. "It IS okay for him to borrow that, right?"

The girl nodded meekly. Pinkie's smile got bigger, and she skipped towards the door blissfully. They both went through the door, closing it gently. It started to sparkle and flicker, then faded from existence.

Some time passed before the girl noticed a post-it note on the bottom of the screen. She lifted it up with her cursor, expanding it. She read it, then smiled.

"Thank you. I'll bring it back within a week or so, then borrow the next one."

At that moment, something occurred to her. Something she'd regret for the rest of the week, if not the rest of time.

She didn't get their autographs!

Chapter 2.1: Blast from the Past?

Pinkie and Discord floated away from the glass sheet they had just exited from, the door disappearing behind them. The glass, however, stayed illuminated, revealing the girl who was still at the desk.

"So, the screen's still lit up like this because she's still there?" Discord asked.

Pinkie shook her head. "Nope. It's still lit up because this screen," she tapped it lightly, "is awake. It recognizes who we are now, and screens will only wake for ponies they recognize and like. That's why there's a green light coming from around it, too!"

Sure enough, a green aura luminated from the glass, as if giving the permission to enter it once more. The thought of the screens being even remotely sentient bothered Discord, as that meant he had physically passed through it in order to gain access to that other world. Do these things feel pain? Do they even feel emotion? he wondered. He dismissed the thought, realizing just how silly an idea that was.

He slapped himself hard when he realized that he thought something was too silly to exist.

"Still getting used to the idea of there being someplace outside of our world?" Pinkie called. She had floated about a mile away, yet Discord still heard her like she was right next to him. Odd, he thought. Maybe she's using the panels for an echo effect? Then he remembered when his voice echoed and reverberated a short while ago when he yelled out in annoyance. He'd have to remember that in case he ever got lost in this place.

He willed himself to appear next to Pinkie, who was inspecting the glass before her. It was old, clearly, and slightly covered in dust. Something about this glass seemed very familiar, yet totally distant and forgotten. He got a bit closer and immediately felt a wave of heat engulf him. He immediately backed away, grabbing a protesting Pinkie.

"Hey! What're you doing?" She wriggled in his paw and claw. "I was looking at that!"

"Shush." He said. He stared hard at the layer of dust, and the glass behind it. Slowly, very slowly, a picture came into view. It was faint, very faded, but he could make out the shapes of creatures behind it. They looked familiar, yet incredibly different. Their faces were oddly over-detailed, and they all looked exactly the same, except for color variations and... cutie marks? They had manes and tails, but they were very muted and boring colors. Every feature about them looked... old. Not old as in ancient like him, but old as in... faded. Used up. Dated. Retro.

The "ponies" beyond were Pegasi, and they flew around the sky without flapping their wings somehow. A large rainbow encompassed the sky, and the ponies slid down it like a slide. Huh he thought. I've never actually tried that before. Looks kinda fun.

The Pegasi then slid down into a rainbow waterfall, splashing into the pool below and covering the screen in water. Suddenly, the rainbow was back again, and the words "My Little Pony" were emblazoned on the side. He thought he could faintly hear music playing. That wave of heat was still preventing him from going anywhere near it.

Pinkie wriggled herself free from his clutches, and gave both him and the screen an odd look. "Forget it, Discord. You don't wanna go in that one." She said in an odd disgust. "Trust me."

He continued to watch the screen, and a pink Unicorn with white hair and purple highlights appeared, standing on top of a cliff. She looked down the cliff, as if to determine whether she would jump or not. Suddenly, a white Earth Pony on roller skates zoomed in behind her. He could just barely make out what the Earth Pony yelled before leaping over the Unicorn.

"Look out, Twilight! Her I gooooooooooooooo!"

TWILIGHT? No way!

After a purple filly had jumped off the cliff and was saved by a Pegasus, the pink Unicorn looked down the cliff, saying something. It was faint, but Discord heard the words "I wish, I wish, I WISH."

Suddenly, the Unicorn was on the ground, the massive cliff behind her. Yup, that was Twilight, alright! No pony knew a spell of that level except a student that was under the tutelage of Princess Celestia.

A pink Pegasus, who somewhat resembled Rainbow Dash, soared across the sky and did a rather basic loop-di-loop. She flew lower to the ground and passed another group of ponies, including "Twilight". The Pegasus, whose name was evidently Firefly, zoomed into a basket of apples with an orange and blonde pony in front. He immeidately recognized Applejack, though she didn't have her hat. A couple other mares ran forward to see if she was okay, then Pinkie immediately covered his eyes with her tail.

"What the- what's the big idea?!"

"There are just some things that you aren't meant to see, Discord. This is one of them!"

He parted her hair with his hands. What was so bad that she needed to-

...

OH MY. Was Applejack..... LICKING another ponies face? He couldn't tell for sure, because the screen faded to black immeidately after.

He raised his arms in frustration, a camera in both paw and claw ready to take in as much juicy evidence as possible. "Aw, COME ON! It was just getting to be interesting!"

Pinkie shoved the glass forward with all her might, but not too hard as to cause damage. The screen floated away, the images from before repeating themselves once more in an infinite loop.

She turned to Discord, once again authoritative. "That is a place that NOPONY from our world should ever go to. Not even you." She booped him at "you", his nose honking like a party horn.

"Why not? What could possibly be so bad in that place? It looked harmless." He thought about that for a second. "Harmless and boring, yeah, but still harmless."

She folded her forelegs, then continued. "Listen. This place we're in, it's more than what you think. This place, this.... this Hub, is something that connects hundreds of universes together, just like that one." The screen still continued to float backwards, lazily. "Not only is that another dimension entirely, but..." she swallowed slightly, nervous. "It's also another time. Like, in the very distant past, time. Anything you do there, good or bad, would affect our world."

"So what you're saying is that world we just saw-"

She nodded and cut him off. "Exactly. That was Equestria from an incredibly distant time. Far beyond Princess Celestia, Princess Luna... even beyond you."

He caught himself holding his breath. He released it, letting the butterflies fly out of his stomach in sweet release. A big ugly moth was in the mix, but he had no clue how that was there He looked up to the screen once again, but it had vanished into the infinite dark. He glanced down at the pony before him. For one so air-headed and care-free, she certainly had a lot of knowledge tucked under that fluffy pink mane, especially considering this particular topic. Too much knowledge, honestly. He thought There was something she wasn't saying to him, and he didn't like it.

Pinkie floated back towards their glass, every so often looking to make sure that the old, dirty glass was far beyond her sight. She propelled herself even faster once she was certain it was gone. Discord quickly materialized a set of binoculars, ad focused in on the screen. The muted images were still repeating themselves, but the scree was slowly fading to black. He took the moth out of the air, then took a Plunder Seed that was stuck in between his teeth and stuck it onto the moths back. He took a slingshot from nowhere and shot the poor insect at the distant pane, waiting for it to hit it's mark.

Seconds passed. A minute.

*tink*

Good. He poofed the slingshot away and teleported to the pink pony. He was lucky that she was so trusting, and not at all aware of the fact that -

"Aware of what, Mr. Author?"

Oh... uh. Nothing. Nothing at all.

Pinkie turned around to, somehow, look at what I had typed previously, but stopped mid-way to yawn and stretch. She was too tired to care much, so she let... whatever it was I said slide.

WHEW. Close one.

Chapter 3: More me? More me? More me? More me? More me? More me? More me?

The draconequus and party pony floated towards their glass, anxious to get home and end today's semi-dramatic (and scandalous) adventure. The concept of this subspace, this "Hub", was still perplexing Discord. He still had so many questions left unanswered, so many things to discover about these worlds, where they lead, and what lived within them. The question was left to broil in his brain, like an egg in a frying pan. Thinking of eggs, he was hungry. He decided he would have tofu-tuna salad sandwiches later with Fluttershy, hard-boiled eggs and all. Gag.

Suddenly, a screen popped up in front of him, blocking him from Pinkie Pie. She turned around to see a reversed image of a veggie salad sandwich in the middle of the screen, along with many other sandwiches of various types.

She scratched her head, confused. "How'd you do that? I know you can make things appear out of nowhere, but I didn't think you could control the screens too!"

He shrugged his skrawny shoulders, just as confused as she was. "Heck if I know. It just popped up when I started thinking about tofu-salad sandwiches." He stroked his beard, curious. "I wonder..."

He pressed his paw against the screen and he immediately fell through, as if nothing was there at all. Pinkie flew around to the front and followed him in, landing just a few feet away. She giggled when she saw the abstract creature buried face first in a tofu english-muffin sandwich, then walked over to help pull him out.

He coughed up a mouthful of tofu, spitting in disgust. "UGH. Pfft! Pfft! Get this dreck off of my tongue!" He conjured a glass of chocolate milk and a cone cotton candy, then downed them both instantly. Pinkie let out a soft mewl of sadness, then grinned manically when Discord summoned some for her, too. He looked around the area, trying to find some sort of sign as to where they were. After looking for a few minutes, he saw something written in... the sky?

"What is this http://girliegirlarmy.com/nosh/20100606/seven-savory-summery-sandwich-recipes/ place?" he said, looking down to a hyper-active Pinkie Pie. "Is this another world controlled by humans?" No reply was received, as Pinkie was currently swinging around the screen with her tail like an orangutan after eating a ghost pepper. He watched her swing around, slightly amused. He had forgotten just how ridiculous this pony could be, considering her demeanor as of late. He knew there was a certain mental condition for that, but he couldn't think of it off the top of his head.

The area around them changed, and the odd zig-zag background became a dull grey wall, covered in text relating to a condition called "Manic Depression" or "Bi Polar Disorder" Ah. So that's what that is. He then looked up to where the sign had been originally, only now it had changed to http://www.webmd.com/depression/guide/bipolar-disorder-manic-depression

"Huh." He said aloud. "I think I understand this now." Getting a sudden urge of both curiosity and narcissism, he started thinking about himself and all of the wonderfully chaotic things he had done in his past. Dark memories brewed in his mind, though not so far back as when he was first encased in stone. Instead, it was more recent events, like when he conquered Equestria upon his release. He remember being in Celestia's throne room, wistfully slithering about the stained glass and mocking the bearers of the elements.

The world changed again, and he was surrounded by something what was hilarious, nostalgic, horrifying, and all together nonsensical.

Himself.

Dozens of pictures of the draconequus flooded the landscape, causing Pinkie to do a double take from her sugar induced personality switch. She immediately ran to Discord and grabbed his draconian leg.

"No, Discord! You can't do this! You'll cause too much interaction between worlds, and that only makes-"

He grinned as maliciously as he could down at her, then snapped with his eagle claw. "Chaos?"

"Oh.... right."

The minute that deviously wonderful little word was uttered, every single picture, stained glass representation, and what he assumed were "fan-drawings" of him, turned their eyes and heads to him, smiling.

WELCOME, FRIEND.

Every fiber of Discord's being shuddered when he heard the endless cacophony of doppelgangers' greeting. Not from fear or anticipation, but because it was such a monumental sound that it literally rattled his body from sheer volume and mass. Suddenly, all of the other Discords starting peeling themselves from the other individual windows, walking to him rather slowly and oddly. Now he shuddered a bit from being creeped out. Perhaps this was a bad idea.

Oh well, too late now!

Every Discord except for the original starting summoning random objects: cats, dogs, frogs, bogs, trees, bees, knees, fleas, flies, mice, dice, trikes, bikes, pikes, rakes, cakes, stakes, steaks which many started to eat both raw and uncooked, spaghetti, linguine, basil, fettuccine, hats, mats, trash, mashed potatoes, cars, ships, Ships (though Discord averted his eyes when he saw a ship of him and Twilight, ew), lips, hips...

Ow. My fingers are hurting from typing so much stuff. You know what? I'm just going to get a list of random things from Yahoo!. You'll get the idea.

fork

spoon

bottle cap

thong

nail clippers

candle

ice cube

slipper

thread

glow stick

needle

stop sign

blouse

hanger

rubber duck

shovel

bookmark

model car

tampon

rubber band

tire swing

sharpie

picture frame

photo album

nail filer

tooth paste

bath fizzers

tissue box

deodorant

cookie jar

rusty nail

drill press

chalk

word searches

thermometer

face wash

paint brush

candy wrapper

shoe lace

leg warmers

wireless control

boom box

quilt

stockings

card

tooth pick

shawl

speakers

key chain

cork

helmet

mouse pad

zipper

glasses

lamp shade

sketch pad

gage

plastic fork

flag

clay pot

check book

CD

#2 pencil

fake flowers

sticky note

hair tie

credit card

sun glasses

seat belt

buckel

button

canvas

vase

lip gloss

rug

gel

twezzers

toe ring

scotch tape

bow

white out

grid paper

eraser

puddle

cement stone

sponge

lace

outlet

frizz control

sailboat

screw

sand paper

eye liner

pool stick

pop can

balloon

spring

ipod charger

twister

burger

hotdog

buns

baggie

beanie

skinny jeans

hoodie

vans

cake mix

cookies

brownie

pie

banana

paper

sandwich

crackers

pipe

cool whip can

cheese block

macaroni and cheese

duct tape

rope

Actually, to save you readers from a headache, I'll just put this link here.
http://www.generatorland.com/usergenerator.aspx?id=3452
Whatever you generate, they made.

Pinkie Pie looked up into the sky past the fleet of exploding chocolate dirigibles, flying rhinos in tutus and cowboy hats, and exploding bottles of Mentoes and Diet Soda bottles made out of every rare mineral in Equestria and goat cheese. "You're just being lazy now, Mr. Author."

It's either that, or type out EVERY object I can imagine in my mind. That'd take way too long and I like not having carpel tunnel syndrome, thank you very much.

She shrugged, ducking her head from a bladed flying disk nearly coming within inches of her face. "Fair enough."

Amidst the infinite amount of chaos, Discord sat upon his throne high above all the others and gazing down upon them. He watched as Discord threw a lemon the size of a griffon at Discord, who has just given Discord a wedgie and had started to shower under a hurricane. He looked right as Discord bounced with strange looking shoes, boxing Discord with inflatable boxing gloves and drinking a sports drink. To his left, Discord, Discord, Discord, Discord, Discord, Discord, Discord, Discord, Discord, Discord, Discord, Discord, Discord, Discord, Discord, Discord, Discord, Discord, Discord, Discord, Discord, Discord, Discord, Dorcisd, Orcidsd, Ircdosd Discord, Discord, Discord, Discord and possibly Discord were all playing a game of "Pin the Discord on the Sunbutt", and Discord had just pinned his own self onto the posters face. They all guffawed, chortled, and whooped as Discord let loose a wind so fierce that it pushed away every Discord within a mile radius, their eyebrows catching fire from the sheer force of the blast. The picture of Celestia had a hole where the face had once been, and was slightly ablaze from the flatulence. This only made the Discords laugh even harder.

A perfect sight, indeed.

A perfect.

BORING.

Sight.

He knew chaos was fun. He knew disrupting order was fun. But to have nothing but chaos, with absolutely no opposition or competition? It was... strangely boring. Not even strangely boring, just plain boring. Dull. Repetitive. Humdrum. Threadbare. Monot-

Discord looked up to the sky from his throne and screamed "We get it, you insufferable fool! GET ON WITH IT!"

Another Discord from below yelled "Yes, get on with it!" All at once, every Discord yelled up at me:

"GET ON WITH IT!"

Aw... But I'm having fun with this!

"GET ON WITH IT!" The main villain of the story (who shall not be named, ha ha spoilers) yelled into my ear bud.

Alright, sheesh. Anyway, Discord (the one we know and love, sort of) snapped his eagle talon. Every version of himself on the ground immediately stopped moving, then stood at attention facing their original version. He sort of hated to do this, but he needed some degree of order to complete this task. He dispelled them from the world, putting them back into their respective windows and sealing them shut, hopefully forever. He sighed, then lowered himself and his throne to ground level. Pinkie sat, waiting for him to open his eyes. He did so after a few seconds.

"Not so fun, was it?" She said with a knowing smile. He shook his head. "Yup. I know the exact feeling." They started walking towards the way they had entered from, Pinkie regaling the spirit on how she had had a similar incident with the Mirror Pool.

***

The screen rested. It had finally managed to seal itself forever from those annoying interlopers that had caused it so much trouble, and it was more than happy to get some shutdown time. However, by the time it had noticed the remaining occupant had raised their weapon to attack it, it was far too late. The screen shattered as the weapon destroyed it from the inside, shards erasing themselves from existence in a digital snowstorm of pixels and lights. The attacker leaped out into the Hub and watched as the prison faded from reality, its other captives disappearing with it all screaming in a magnificent, computerized agony.

He placed his weapon back into its sheath. He'd have to sharpen it later. The Wall may have been weakened by the visitors, but it was still powerful on a relatively cosmic level. He was lucky some random fan had drawn a picture of him and Discord together, along with that weird clown guy. He had no idea why they were singing Christmas Carols, but that didn't matter now. He was free, and that's all that counted.

He snapped fingers in his mind, and a tiny screen appeared before him. He entered https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xdOykEJSXIg into the URL space, then pressed play when Youtube loaded the song. He started sauntering in a random direction that suited him, thinking about what a cheese sandwich would taste like if you were to fry it on a meteor. He smiled at the thought, then danced in rhythm to the music. Then he got bored and used his magic to pull out another weapon, shooting screens he passed by and ending the lives of everything and everyone inside. Much better! he thought. Screams always make music so much better.

Today was going to be a very fun day.

Very fun indeed.

Chapter 4: Discord's Divination

"... and that's how I nearly accidentally destroyed Equestria! Again!" Pinkie concluded as they finally reached their glass in the Hub. When Discord realized Pinkie was done talking, he removed the plugs from his large donkey-like ears and pretended to be enamored by her long-winded monologue. They placed their hooves, claw and paw against the glass and were immediately welcomed by the colossal panel. They set hoof on Ponyville soil, taking in the surroundings of the town. Literally nothing had changed since they had left. Everypony was in a complete standstill, and it was incredibly eerie with absolutely no sound or smell anywhere. Ponies frozen in time and space, unblinking and unmoving. Discord had a shudder that rattled every bone in his body, as seeing this strange sight reminded him of his imprisonment.

The draconequus turned to the pink pony, his eye brow raising. "I just remembered something Pinkie, something I had meant to ask you for a while now but had forgotten entirely in the mix of all this adventuring."

Pinkie's curly headed mane tilted to the right in confusion, her eyes widening. "What's that, Discord?"

"How is it that you're able to freeze this world and leave it like this without having access to any magic?" He had meant to put his question in a bit more of an eloquent way, but he knew the simple pony wouldn't be able to understand the intricacies of -

"As you've probably noticed, we're all constantly engaged in the act of time travel. At its most basic level, time is the rate of change in the universes - and like it or not, we are constantly undergoing change. We age, Celestias sun moves around our planet, and things fall apart or die. We measure the passage of time in seconds, minutes, hours and years, but this doesn't mean time flows at a constant rate. Just as the water in a river rushes or slows depending on the size of the channel, time flows at different rates in different places. In other words, time is relative. But what causes this fluctuation along our one-way trek from the cradle to the grave? It all comes down to the relationship between time and space. Ponies frolic about in the three spatial dimensions of length, width and depth. Time joins the party as that most crucial fourth dimension. Time can't exist without space, and space can't exist without time. The two exist as one: the space-time continuum. Any event that occurs in the universe has to involve both space and time."

She stopped to inhale, then continued.

"Because of how incredibly balanced the space-time continuum is, most normal Earth Ponies and Pegasi aren't able to control both space and time as equally as they'd like. Some ponies can temporarily stop or slow time just by their natural urge to either stop something from happening in space, or if their adrenal glands cause their minds to overflow with temporal energies and literally stop time for just a few seconds so they can think about something while still being able to move around a bit before things return to normal. They always have a massive headache afterwards, but that's simply the result of that previous temporal anomaly catching up to the spacial adjustment. Some ponies are able to access space by simply interacting with objects when spacial ley lines interlay them. For example, if somepony wants to make a point to somepony else, something may conveniently pop up from the Hub (which is outside both time and space, mind you) like a blackboard or something. After some time, the object then randomly returns from whence it came once the ley line passes through our space. It wasn't meant to truly exist within that spacial node, but it did for a short time before moving on to another dimension."

Inhale.

"Because of how incredibly hyperactive and overly caffeinated I am, I'm able to go way ahead of time and space and can control them before they both know they're being controlled in the first place! It takes the space-time continuum some, well, time before it notices it's already been twisted up a bit by me, but I always make sure to reset it to the way it was before it can undo itself and cause harm. Once I undo the knot of the timeline, everything should proceed as normal as if we were never gone. The only problem would be that everything in time and space would move super-duper quick to catch up with itself. Ponies wouldn't notice we were gone, but things would still be updated and changed based just simply on the fact that space and time have to readjust themselves to make sure that everything that was supposed to happen happens at the exact time and place it was meant to occur."

BOOM! I just explained how Pinkie Pie works! Take that, fandom!

"What was that, Mr. Narrator?", the strange pink pony asked.

Nothing, just gloating a bit.

Pinkie smiled, then noticed Discord standing there with a totally shocked expression on his muzzle.

"Too much to handle?" Pinkie giggled, then started to slowly say "I take time and space and tie them up like a pretty ribbon. When I'm done doing things outside of time and space, I undo the knot and things go very quickly to make themselves they way they're supposed to be."

Discord angrily waved a claw. "I know what it means, you silly mare!" He looked away, somewhat dismissively. "I just didn't expect you to be so... lengthy." Pinkie smiled, then pulled out a strange shape from her mane. They were two ropes tied in a knot; one rope a bright pink, the other a royal blue. They both glowed radiantly, like gems caught in just the proper amount of light and cut in just the perfect way.

Pinkie laid out the bow in front of her, setting it flat on the ground. The knot started to meld with the ground before Pinkie began undoing the knot. Once it was undone, the two ropes finally melded with the ground. The earth around them started to shake, and the sky flickered repeatedly as it changed from night to day, sunrise to moonset. Ponies zipped by as streaks of color, going so fast that they were even physically passing through Discords tall frame as if he didn't exist.

Pinkie winked at Discord as she lept up into the sky with all her might. "You may want to jump!"

"What do you mean I'll want to-"

Suddenly, everything came to an immediate halt and proceeded moving about their normal speeds. Ponies walked or flew around, as if nothing had changed within the past few seconds. The sun was just about to set, revealing small fire flies in the distance that had looked like streaks of pure light before. Pinkie Pie landed on the ground just before the grass stopped moving in the hyper-sped wind. Discord, however, was hopping about in a foalish fashion as the fur on his cloven hoof was set ablaze by the friction of the grass. He summoned a bucket full of water from nowhere, placing his singed hoof inside and sighing happily.

He stopped when he realized something at that moment. He had just brought forth something that wasn't there before, and now it existed in this realm. Did that mean that it had come from another universe? Was it being used for something important before he had snatched it away from it's previous owner? This question raised more questions, and those doubled and tripled and quadrupled in his mind. He sat as he thought and thought, while Pinkie gave him a concerned look.

"What's the matter now, Discord? Still confused by all of this?"

He shook his head. "Not what you explained, no. Well, not exactly." He pointed at the bucket. "This bucket. I summoned it here. There was no... I don't know, bucket-space there before. Now there is, taking up the space of air that existed before it."

Pinkie nodded.

"So, that means that I can also access some small fraction of the space-time continuum."

She shrugged. "Well, yeah. I figured you'd know that by now! You've been alive since... well forever!" She leaned in, curious. "Have you really never thought about all of this before?"

"No, honestly." He held the bucket up with his paw. "I just think of something, it appears, end of story. I never actually cared about where it came from; just as long as I had it, it didn't matter." He stared at the metal tub, pondering hard. "So this bucket. It has ley lines that move it from one space to another?"

"Nope." She said, shaking her curly mane. "See, that's what makes you so unique. You're an exception to the concept of space! You can take whatever, where-ever. Probably even from whenever, too!"

"Okay, that I already sort of know. What I'm still sort of confused on is..."

***

Pinkie and Discord continued their conversation as they walked away from Sugar Cube Corner, not noticing the pair of eyes that was staring beyond The Wall into their world. The two white orbs closed their bottom lids slightly, as if smiling. Oh goody! They're trying to debate how space-time works! the onlooker thought in their strange, twisted mind. I wonder how long it'll be before they get so caught up in their thoughts their HEADS explode!

That's ridisulous. You know heads don't explode from overthinking. If they did, yours would've popped years ago.

Hey! Don't get smarmy with me now, jerk-face!

But you have MY face, so therefore you yourself are a jerk-face.

Not if I rip it off and slap onto your face! HA!

That... makes no sense.

OOH! That sounds fun! Like ripping off a scab from yesterday's skateboarding incident!

Umm... excuse me? Can I continue my story, here?

"Yeah, sure. Don't mind us. I mean me, I mean.... meh." The rather strange, crimson clad colt said.

Is he not going to say our name? I'm pretty sure the fanbase isn't smart enough to know who we are.

No offense, kids! Wait, no, I take that back. ALL OF THE OFFENSE! ALL OF IT!

The bizarre Unicorn turned towards... me? How... whatever. He turned towards me and said, "Ḑ̶̧̜͎̼̬̼̜̼ͯ̍̏̽̀ͣ̇ͬ́ͅe̴̴̢̥͙̝͎̹̯͈̠̰̗͍̘̬͍͕̠ͯͩ͐ͣ̇ͤ̽ͭ̇̒̊̋̂ͯ͟͢a̵̟̹̜͇̺̪ͦͯ̿͆͑̂̾̀̊̏̚͝ḋ̡̟͉̥̖͎̟̭͕̼͙́̍̋ͨ̈̾̉ͥ͂ͨ̍̀̽ͩ̽̋͞͝p̺̲̪̜͍̩̮̼̬̦̮̰̹̞͊̇̀̅ͪͧ̐̽̽͑ͮͦ͂̍ͣ͜͞ͅơͦ̇͊͞͏̡̼͖̩̠̣̠͈̜̙͚̯o̡̥͓͚̘̤̝̳̮̟̝̗̜̗͖͗̑ͨ̏ͤ̾͗ͣͧ͐́ͯ́̀̋̎̑͒̚͠ͅͅļ̸̷͕͇͕̹̲̹͙̪̩̖͙̂̈̎̃̿̑̀ͩ͂̋̆͆̑̽̚͜. Wait a minute, WHAT?! You used a text scrambler on me?!" He fell to his knees, giving me a look of heartbreak. "I thought we were pals! I thought what we had was

SPECIAL

Sorry, I gotta keep it a surprise. Though, people can probably see your name through the Zalgo scrambler anyway.

D͍͇̥̟̣̰̺̠̻̫̭̟̜̝ͭͪ͒̓̏͜͜e̸̪͎̖̬̲̘̘̟͖̹͆̋ͥ̎̔̃͡͠a̧̎̂̈́̄̀̓͗͞͝҉̲̞͉͇̤̟̳̦̯̤d̨̻̭̞̻̳̼̬͖̦̗̱̼̏̏̿ͯͬͭ̍́̿́̕ͅpͣͭͫ͒̑̿ͥ̒҉̷͇͖̖̭̭̭̼͇͜o̧̮̳̺̠͈̩̟ͣ͊ͦ̂̅̀o̵̡̤̜̗̖̝͉͚͇̻̯̩̽ͮ̀̓͛ͮͬ̂̊͛͆ͥͬ̒́̚͘͘l̵̮͔̼͔̩̳͚̟̪̺ͮ͒̅ͫ̃̋ͥ͘ pumped a hoof in victory. "Yes! People will really like..." He stopped and looked down at his hooves. "Why the **** do I have hooves?"

Oh dear...