Friday, June 22ndby 10art1ChaptersPinkie PieLyra HeartstringsRainbow DashPinkie PiePinkie Pie began her morning as usual, mashing her face into a cake before even getting out of bed. As she lapped the frosting off her forehead with her tongue that really shouldn’t stretch that far, she saw a big red circle around the date; this was the day she would throw Sweetie Belle a party, for what she didn’t know, nor did she really care. A careful observer could also point out that almost each day was circled in bright red on her calendar. She bounced precariously down the stairs to the main shop floor and into the kitchen where she ate about half the Cakes’ inventory for the day, a necessary sacrifice for adopting the unstable pink pony. She scarfed down in nearly an instant 30 multicolored cupcakes, a small red velvet cake with chocolate frosting, and topped it off with a large helping of fruit punch. “Ah what a wonderful sunny day!” she marveled, as the sun gently beat down on her rich pink coat and she looked up at the dark blue sky, completely cloudless, and silently thanked Dash for not oversleeping. She wasn’t necessarily lazy, she just sometimes gets so overconfident that she doesn’t give herself enough time to get her work done, but in reality she has a great track record, or else she wouldn’t be leading the finest weather team in the Ponyville area. A shouting broke her silent bliss. “And don’t come back until you learn some manners!” “Fine! Good luck living in our apartment without me!” “I’m the one always paying the bills and cleaning your dry necessities off the toilet seat!” “Girls, girls! There’s no need to fight! Maybe Aunt Pinkie can fix your problems!” “Well, can you make Lyra have some manners and a sense of order?” “Bon Bon is just being a cranky bitch, don’t mind her.” Lyra said, walking off down the street. “Wait! You don’t have to go! Pinkie can make everypony feel better!” Pinkie shouted, as Lyra silently rounded the corner. “That mare needs to go see a doctor...” Bon Bon said angrily, slamming the door. “Doctor? Oh no! I completely forgot!” Pinkie fumbled out from behind her three cupcake balloons and tied them around herself, as she hastily pawed at the air, trying to get to the doctor as quickly as possible without being normal. * By the time Pinkie made it to the Doctor’s office 2 blocks away, almost an hour had passed. She untied her cupcake balloons and let them float up into the air and she went down the stairs to get to the front door. She let herself in and signed herself in with the receptionist. “Mrs. Pie, the doctor wants to see you.” The receptionist called out some seconds after Pinkie sat down, slightly nettling her to have to stand right back up, but she put on a smile nevertheless and bounced into one of the rooms. “Alright, Pie comma Pinkie, let’s quickly check your blood pressure...” the doctor said strapping a device onto her foreleg that buzzed and squeezed her, like a little creature hugging her. “Not bad, mmmhmm over 70...” The doctor mumbled, scribbling his thoughts onto a clipboard just like Twilight likes to do. Maybe she wants to be a doctor? Pinkie’s thought was interrupted. “...and now for your booster shots.” Her blood pressure skyrocketed. “Heh, don’t worry Pinkie, it’s nothing to... Where’d you go?” * Pinkie was hauled back into the room by two muscular security guards, kicking and screaming. “NOOO! DON’T DO IT! SERIOUSLY! NO PLEASE!” She yells with closed eyes! “I SWEAR IF YOU STICK A NEEDLE IN ME I WILL-“ “Pinkie, I’m done...” the doctor said, holding an empty syringe, placing a childish band-aid with humans on it on her foreleg where the injection was made. Pinkie rubbed her foreleg gingerly, feeling violated, and was led out into the hall by a nurse for a few minutes to weigh her and check her height and her reflexes. The nurse hummed and scribbled on her clipboard, after which she held it up and showed Pinkie the results. “Not bad Pinkie. You are here” she said, pointing a hoof to a red dot at the top and end of the growth curve. “Your weight is fine in proportion to your height, but be careful because you’re a grown mare now and your body-“ “Uh, Pinkie?” The doctor called back into the hall. “I think you should see this.” Pinkie happily hopped back into the office and plopped her flank onto a chair. “I did some blood tests and it appears you have... diabetes.” The doctor said melancholically. Pinkie’s smile slowly dropped down to her legs. “I have... diabeetus?” “Diabetes, yes.” “D- d- diabeetus?” “It means you can’t eat sweets anymore or else your pancreas will implode.” “How do you know?” “Well for one...” the doctor began condescendingly. “We found bits of frosting in your blood stream.” Pinkie stood up and left the room; she needn’t hear any more. “Wait, don’t you want to hear about your treatment options? A free diabetes cookbook?” A drop of her puffy hair and a desaturation of her coat answered the question for him. In an adjacent room an old gray stallion sat with a cane against his hips. Another doctor with the same standard clipboard entered the room and stood before the old stallion. "Well it appears your blood work is all clear, but you have a slight anemic issue, and laying off the sweets just a bit might fix that right up." "Sweets?" the old stallion barked. "I can't have sweets on account of my diabetes!" The doctor, puzzled, flipped through his clipboard. "What diabetes?" * She dragged herself back into the waiting room right into two golden eyes. “Hi pinkie! Good news! There were rumors I was mentally handicapped floating around, but the doctors did some tests, and it turn out I just have a lazy eye! How embarrassing! But also I think I sprained a wing just now which isn’t good...” Derpy noticed the defeated look on Pinkie’s face. “Is something wrong?” “Yes, Derpy, I have diabeetus.” “Oh, Pinkie! Do you need a hug?” “Yes please...” she requested, short on breath, and hugged Derpy, tears streaming from her eyes. The words of the doctor rang through her head. “You can’t eat sweets.... can’t eat sweets... can’t sweets.... sweets....” “Ummm Pinkie... you can let go now...” Derpy offered after a hug that seemed to last 5 minutes. Pinkie kept sobbing in her self-pity on Derpy’s shoulder until she was suddenly interrupted by an ear-piercing rumble as the building shook and the lights went out. Pinkie set her pity aside and ran out the door in a severely exaggerated panic, which was completely unnecessary but infallibly characteristic of Pinkie. * Everypony on the street was silent, looking frantically around to try to understand what just happened. Pinkie was in her usual panic mode, but was tuned out by the masses, until a quiet murmur rang through the crowd, as word went around as to what happened. Lyra, who happened to be in the crowd, gasped and galloped at full speed towards the police station. A cover of buildings disabled most from scanning from where the source came from, but a few pegasi were on the roofs of buildings, staring in awe at the source of the loud boom. Pinkie was too busy screaming and panicking to participate in the spreading of the word, it was only until Applejack, who happened to be nearby, stuffed a hoof in her mouth, the universal sign of “shut up”. “mffmmummmfgh mff mumpff?” “Ah’ll tell you what’s happnin if’n you just stop s-“ “ATTENTION EVERYPONY!” Rainbow Dash shouted in a commanding voice. “BY ORDERS OF THE MAYOR MARE, EVERYPONY IS TO EVACUATE TO THE NEAREST NUCLEAR FALLOUT BUNKER; WHICH FOR THIS AREA IS THE BASEMENT OF THE LIBRARY!” She rubbed her throat and flew off farther to continue yelling, while another pegasus pony with orange flight line marshaling batons guided the sparse crowd in the direction of the library. “ThisissoexcitingweareallgoingtoTwilight’streelibraryhousethingandTwilightwillbethereandSpikeand... *GASP* WE WILL ALL HAVE A SLEEPOVER!” Pinkie spat out, causing Applejack to cringe at her awkwardly. “Sugarcube, you’re fine and dandy, but do you think you might be able to take this situation a bit more seriously?” They stepped over the threshold of the door and entered the library, inside which the cool air blew onto them, cooling their bodies, the sweat beading on their foreheads disappearing. “Everypony, may I have your attention, please?” Twilight asked at the crowd. The banter died down to light mumbling. “Mayor Mare has asked that everypony stay calm and do not leave the shelter as there is evidence of immediate danger.” About half of the room gasped when they heard this, some of them who had heard rumors began prematurely confirming them and passing them on. “Now, I want you all to stay calm and-“ “IS PONYVILLE UNDER ATTACK?” one mare screamed. “Ummm, by orders of the city I can’t reveal-“ “MY FILLY IS OUTSIDE!” a stallion cried desperately. “Should anyone be outside, a weather pony will escort them to the nearest fallout shelter, which may not be this one, however everypony will be reunited soon-“ “MOMMY!” one colt screamed, and everypony broke into a loud riot, trampling and running hysterically. Pinkie took out a bag of cake batter which she had stashed in one of the walls and started flinging it around, covering the surrounding ponies in a layer of lemon-flavored goo. An ear-piercing whistle broke the mob. “EVERYPONY! PLEASE!” Rainbow yelled. “We have to show you this!” A screen flickered and grains of monochromatic sand pattered the screen, until a circle with the number 4 on it appeared, and slowly wedged away until a 3 appeared, followed by a 2, and then a 1, and then a black and white movie with a turtle wearing a white helmet and a chorus accompanied by a piano began. “Dum dum, dee doo dum dum, dee doo dum dum, dee doo dum dum...” “Oh boy a car-“ Pinkie began, but a hoof in her mouth silenced her. “There was a turtle by the name of Bert” The chorus sang. “And Bert the Turtle was very alert.” Suddenly a monkey with a stick of lit dynamite appeared on the screen. “When danger threatened him he never got hurt; he knew just what to do!” *pop* the dynamite detonated, just as Bert the Turtle hid himself inside his shell. “He’d duck... and cover; he’d duck... and cover. He did what we all must learn to do; You, and you, and you, and you. Duck... and coveeeeeer.” The chorus then began to sing “doo doo doo doo doo to the same tune quietly as a narrator began to speak over. “Be sure to remember what Bert the Turtle just did, everypony, because every one of us must learn to do the same thing. That’s what this film is all about.” Right as he said that, the words “Duck and Cover” appeared on the screen covering Bert hiding in his shell. “Duck and Cover” The narrator continued. “This is an official Civil Defense film produced in cooperation with the Imperial Civil Defense Administration (ICDA), and the consultation with the safety commission of the Imperial Education Association. Produced by Equine Productions, Inc. Hey Bert! Come on out and meet all these nice ponies!” Bert still hid in his shell, and his eyes oscillated from side to side within his shell, showing he had no desire of leaving his shell. “Alright, we really can’t blame you. You see, Bert is a very very careful fellow...” he said, as Bert snatched up his helmet and returned it to his head. “When there’s danger, this is the way he keeps from being hurt. Sometimes, it even saves his life.” The screen faded to a scene of school-aged foals at their desks, with a stallion teaching the class. “That’s why these colts and fillies are practicing to duck and cover, just as you do at your place of shelter. We all know that the world is very dangerous. Since it might turn against us, we must get ready for it, just as we are ready for many other dangers that are around us all the time. Fire is a danger, it can burn whole buildings if somepony is careless.” The scene shifted to a burning building and a firepony sliding down a fire pole. “But we are ready for fires. We have a fine fire department to put out the fire, and you have fire drills so you know what to do. Now, we must be ready for a new dangeaughpffff....” the narrator died down as the screen flickered and died, and the projector huffed and whizzed and spat out black stuff that wound into a ball. “Well that was interesting...” Twilight said, sitting on her flank, staring unamused at what she had just seen.” “Oh poor Bert the Turtle!” Pinkie shouted. “SO WE ARE UNDER ATTACK!” A pony shouted. “Everypony stay calm, we don’t know for sure!” Rainbow yelled, fumbling with the projector. Lyra HeartstringsLyra’s day, or rather, morning-so-early-the-sun-has-barely-come-up began as usual, on the computer, looking up humans. The whirring from the monitor woke up Bon Bon, who tried rolling over to make the sound go away, but eventually regained consciousness and felt like punching somepony for waking her up at... 6:30 in the morning. “Lyuura!” *ahem* “LYRA!” she yelled. “What could you possibly be doing this early in the morning?” She hopped up and examined her screen. Lyra quickly closed out of her tab, only to be confronted with more and more tabs, so she just quickly closed them all. “Porn.” She said. “Really... really hardcore coltcuddling.” “Mhmmm... I see you also changed the background.” She clicked the desktop settings and noticed there were over 100 pictures of all things human set to change every 30 seconds. “Lyra, at first I thought you were kidding, but this really scares me.” “There is absolutely NOTHING wrong with liking humans.” “For a 6 year old, sure. But for a 19 year old mare to wake up at 6-“ “4 actually” “Fine 4- wait, WHAT? So you woke up at 4 in the morning to look up humans?” Bon Bon reopened the browser and examined the history. She had recently closed a photobucket page, a deviantart, 5 different Earth Daily pages, with plushy compilations, drawings, and something called fapfics. “Lyra... what does fap mean?” “Well you see, it’s like clopping, except humans have hands, so-“ Bon Bon facehoofed. “WHY DO YOU DO THIS?” “Seriously, just watch the first few episodes!” “I already heard the intro, that’s enough for me.” “But the intro doesn’t do it any justice! Of course if you haven’t seen anything else the intro would turn you away!” “Lyra, NO. And stop being so... weird.” “So I shouldn’t watch humans? Please, tell me what else I can’t enjoy based on your tastes.” Lyra snapped back. “Look, just... I can’t even talk to you. First the sitting, then the emotional breakdowns because you realized you can never fulfill your special talent because you can’t play a lire, and now this bull. I don’t even know why I live with you!” “Because” Lyra said. “I am a fun, carpe-diem, happy unicorn, while you are a boring, snobby, bitchy earth pony. I complete you.” “UGH! THAT’S IT!” Bon Bon raged, as she headbutted Lyra out of the front door to the building. “And don’t come back until you learn some manners!” “Fine! Good luck living in our apartment without me!” “I’m the one always paying the bills and cleaning your dry necessities off the toilet seat!” “Girls, girls! There’s no need to fight! Maybe Aunt Pinkie can fix your problems!” Pinkie cried out from across the street. “Well, can you make Lyra have some manners and a sense of order?” “Bon Bon is just being a cranky bitch, don’t mind her.” Lyra said, walking off down the street. “Wait! You don’t have to go! Pinkie can make everypony feel better!” Pinkie shouted, as Lyra silently rounded the corner. “Bon Bon thinks I can’t go on without her. Pfffff. I’ve been kicked out of her side of the bed before, I’ve been forced to sleep on the couch before, how much more different can this be?” Lyra sat down and laid herself down on the sidewalk, against a red brick wall that was the building adjacent to her old home. A chill ran up her spine as she felt the cold, hard, lifeless concrete press against her chest, and she shot up off the floor. “This might actually suck” she thought to herself. * Walking around town for half an hour was taking its toll. Lyra limped groggily, she didn’t get much sleep after all, and her stomach ached and rumbled from the hunger it had amassed. But at 7 in the morning, few ponies were up, nevertheless at their concession stands stocked with food. There was one pony, however, who always got up extra early to catch the early birds, and collaterally those who got kicked out at 6:30: Applejack. “Well howdy there, sugarcube. Can Ah get y’all anything to eat? We got Apple pies, apple fritters, apple dumplings, apple crisps, apple crumble, Apple Brown Bettie, Dutch apple pie, candied apples on a stick, apple turnovers, apple cobbler, apple cider-“ Lyra slammed down 10 bits on the stand. “Yes please!” she sighed eagerly, her tongue nearly rolling out of her muzzle and onto the cobblestone pavement. After emptying Applejack of her fritters, her favorite confectionery, she sat on a concrete wall dividing the sidewalk from a property and began to eat. At first she maintained the slightest bit of manners, but after realizing there was no Bon Bon to tell her to chew with her mouth closed and to use utensils, she dug her face in and ate liberally. “Freedom” she thought, echoing through her head. So what if she won’t be with her closest friend ever anymore? She can make more! “Fluttershy!” she thought, and sped off, tossing her paper plate at a trashcan, missing entirely, and not giving a buck. * Upon Lyra’s arrival, Fluttershy was mending a fence post. “Hi Lyra! “Hi Fluttershy.” She said, and sat down on a log. “Oh dear, Lyra, doesn’t it hurt your back the way you’re sitting?” “No...?” “Why did you decide to pay me a visit, if you don’t mind me asking.” “I got into a fight with Bon Bon... again.” “Oh you poor thing! Tell me about your day.” Fluttershy flew over to Lyra and gently sat on the log with her and extended a hoof around her neck. * “Ok well I’ll be going now, maybe Bon Bon came back to her senses.” “No problem, you are welcome any time” Fluttershy affirmed, closing her eyes and smiling. Lyra trotted back to town, retracing her steps as best as she could Rainbow DashSoarin unlocked the door to his suite in the Grand Swan hotel where he was staying after the air show, and held it open to let his #1 fan in, quietly shutting it and locking all the locks on the door, to ensure they wouldn’t be disturbed. “Wow...” she said, flicking her rainbow mane out of her eyes. “This place is amazing!” She took a few steps, giving herself a hasty tour of the place. There was a heart-shaped indoor jacuzzi, a large sofa folded out and topped with a water mattress, in front of a huge black flat screen TV on top of a pedestal that opened to a minibar, outfitted with every drink imaginable, from sarsaparilla to hard cider, which Rainbow closely eyed. The floor was covered in a soft, shaggy red carpet, the walls an off-white, hinting at orange, and the light dimmed just to allow the room to be viewed. Soarin unzipped his skintight flight suit and shed it onto the floor, and Rainbow squealed like the fan girl they both knew she was at the sight of her hero sans clothes. Soarin took out two ciders, instinctively knowing what Rainbow was eyeing, and tossed one to Rainbow. He took the two wine glasses that lay upside-down on top of the minibar and filled them with cider until the foam nearly spilled over the edge, Rainbow the whole time staring intently at his large, muscular body lying beside her. He handed her the glass and she happily took it, and slowly but surely finished the glass. They both let out little burps and giggled, and they returned the glasses to the mini-fridge. Rainbow wiped her muzzle with her hoof and locked eyes with Soarin, just as his head shot forward and their lips met. His tongue shot inside her mouth, still with the strong flavor of the cider they’d just had together. She closed her eyes and exhaled passionately as he explored her tongue. He pulled out and she opened her eyes to see him right on top of her, his wings fanned out, shading her body from the lights above him with their great size and beauty, each feather perfectly aligned and calibrated for the most efficient flight. She felt her wings spread out from under her, and Soarin began to stroke them, his eyes looking back into Rainbow’s twinkling eyes. “I love... your door.” Soarin said calmly. “I love you t- wait, what?” “OPEN YOUR DOOR!” he yelled in a familiar, higher-pitched voice. Rainbow flung her head up and noticed her wings were sticking out from her dream, but more importantly Derpy was knocking at her door, as a stream of water flowed into it from behind. Rainbow did a pratfall back onto her pillow, covering her eyes with her hooves. She had Derpy over at her house once in a blue moon, but never for a sleepover like she had decided last night, and now she had locked herself out of Rainbow’s room, where she had been sleeping in Rainbow’s bed which she had upgraded with the addition of a few clouds, but moreover there was a torrent of water coming from her general direction, at 6:30 in the morning. What a great way to start the day. Still groggy, she got up and opened the door, which was made of cloud, and observed derpy fumbling with the faucet. “I just don’t know wh-“ “Yeah yeah” Rainbow said, unamused, and punched the faucet into a fine mist, eliminating any problem without the need of professional plumbing. “I’m sorry Rainbow, is there anything I can do to help?” Rainbow’s eyebrows descended as she rubbed her eyes with her hooves, still trying to wake up, and forcefully pushed Derpy out of the bathroom, answering her question, and began her morning shower 2 hours early. “FUUUUUUU- YOU SPILLED OUT ALL THE HOT WATER, DERPY!” Rainbow yelled, her cries muffled by the cloud door, but amplified due to the lack of walls. * A cold, sleepy Rainbow Dash emerged from the bathroom, tossing next to the sink a brush she had just used with some rainbow colored hairs sticking out, and trotted down the stairs to the living room where Derpy was. “So what do you want for breakfast, Derpy? Wait, don’t tell me.” She handed Derpy a muffin. “Actually, it would be nice if you can make toast and jam with a cup of earl grey.” Derpy said politely under her breath. Rainbow monotonously fluttered over to her bread holder and took out a slice, and stuck it into an adjacent black cloud mounted to her counter. She gave the cloud a nice punch, sending sparks shooting throughout it, effectively toasting the bread, and handed it to Derpy along with a jar of jam which was on the table, and took the muffin for herself. At least it was blueberry, one of her favorites. * Rainbow finished half her muffin and set the rest down; she guessed she wasn’t really all that hungry. She set it on her counter and flew out of a nearby window, which was much more convenient than having to open and then close a door, and flew over Ponyville. It was Friday, June 22nd, which meant that she had to clear any low-level clouds, by anypony’s standards an order to make the day perfect. Her eyes were still a bit watery from having just woken up and now the wind rushing into them, but that never stopped Rainbow. The faster she does her job, or rather the more diligently she does it, the more free time she will have, which she already made plans of using to catch up on her napping. Naturally, Derpy was trailing close behind her, being the new mare on the weather team. She liked Dash a lot, like Scootaloo, except it nettled her that she made little effort to disguise her liking. At least Scootaloo made a conscious effort not to seem like a total fan girl; plus she had some skills to back it up which even Rainbow found pretty cool at times, she had to admit. Then, right on cue, a shiny balloon floated to the sky, and Derpy dove after it, shouting “MUFFIN MUFFIN MUFFIN!” Rainbow caught sight of a small patch of clouds hovering towards the middle of town, above Sugarcube Corner, and immediately dispatched them. “Hmm... 9.8. I must be improving!” After a quick flyby, she flew out of her patrol range and landed on a nice soft cloud. “Now, where was I?” she thought to herself. “I love you, Rainbow” Soarin said. * Rainbow and Soarin sat on a pier by the ocean, holding hands as the moon illuminated the waves before them. “It’s so beautiful!” She said, a tear forming in one of her brilliant dark pink eyes. They leaned towards each other, but what was to be the most perfect kiss ever faded as a strong, cold wind blew into her body. The wind grew so strong her eyes watered and soarin was ripped off the pier and flung far into the air. Rainbow flung her eyes open and noticed she was falling. Above her was a weather pony flying away, not even noticing her supervisor was sleeping on the cloud she just vaporized. Rainbow quickly flared her wings and stopped herself before she hit the ground, and landed softly on the grass below. “WATCH WHAT YOU’RE BUCKING YOU- GAH!.” She yelled, noticing the pegasus she was targeting was far out of range for any sort of screaming. She flung out her wings and flew at her faster than she’s gone in a while and smacked right into the pegasus, nearly knocking the wind out of her. They both landed on a cloud, the weather pegasus landed on her back, her eyes wide and her pupils contracted, stunned by what just happened. Rainbow leaned over her with a deep frown over her face, clearly upset that her perfect dream was disturbed once again. “WATCH WHAT YOU’RE BUCKING!” Rainbow yelled in her face. The pegasus slowly nodded and quickly slipped away and flew back to work, this time inspecting every cloud from all sides before bucking it to check for sleeping ponies. Content with her spontaneous disciplinary abilities, she landed back on the green fields she had perched her house over. Her stomach rumbled and she remembered her meager breakfast, and it was likely almost noon. “I guess I should get something to eat” she said to herself, and flew towards the center of Ponyville. * By noon the center of Ponyville was bustling, with farmers and turnipmongers, all yelling what they have to offer and how much for them. As she flew through the crowd, she saw a familiar hat that belonged to a good friend. “Hiya Applejack!” “Oh hey there Rainbow, glad you could drop bah! We got apple pies, apple dumplings, apple cris-“ “Actually some apple fritters sound nice!” “Hehe, you don’t say?” Applejack said defensively. “Funny story, I ran out today at 7...” “Someone bought all the- oh for Pete’s sakes. Oh well I’ll take mmm...” Rainbow scanned over the trays of food. “Some apple cobbler sounds awesome!” “Sure thing. That’ll be 2 bits, 3 if you want cider with that.” Rainbow pulled out a little tied off bag and tossed 3 bits onto the plywood counter and Applejack scooped the money up, winking, and grabbed a mug. * Rainbow sat down onto a concrete barrier across the cobblestone street where everypony seemed to be sitting and ate her apple cobbler happily. Applejack always made the best cobbler. Right as she was about to eat a familiar orange pegasus who always seemed to follow her showed up. “Hiya Rainbow!” She exclaimed, grinning widely. “Hi squirt...” Rainbow said, a bit annoyed that her much needed lunch was delayed. “Will you please tell me the story you promised to tell me?” “Wh- what story?” “Oh you know. You and I were walking past Rarity’s Boutique last Tuesday and I asked you why you came to Ponyville and you said long story so I said I have time and you said maybe later wellnowitslatersowillyoupleasetellmethestoryprettypleasepleaseplease?” Rainbow rolled her eyes and began conjuring up the story in her mind. “Well you see squirt, it all started way long ago in Cloudsdale, which is above the Everfree forest, and uh... yeah I went to school there. I was the best in my class, so to give me at least some challenge they raised me up a grade. Even though I was one of the smallest pegasi in my new classes, I was still one of the fastest.” “Ok kids, this isn’t baby school anymore. You are in the Junior Speedsters Flight Academy!” a stallion with a deep, gravelly voice yelled out to the class. “I want to see 110% from you all! If you are going to be lazy; YOU WILL FAIL! If you are going to be slow; YOU WILL FAIL! If you are going to be weak, YOU WILL FAIL! If you don’t do your homework; YOU WILL FAIL! If you take the course backwards; YOU WILL FAIL! Should you opt out of this course, you will be offered it again in the following year; upon which YOU WILL FAIL!” All the ponies stared at their new teacher blankly and wide-eyed, except for 3 stallions at the back of the room, who were giggling and shooting spitballs at each other. “As a matter of fact, I can tell right away who are going to be my top students, and who are going to be miserable fruit shop owners for the rest of your bloody lives!” Rainbow leaned back in her seat and apprehensively surveyed her desk: Scattered looseleaf, a broken pencil, and a comic book. She wondered why she even brought that to class. She looked at the yellow mare sitting next to her. She hadn’t received her cutie mark yet, either. Her desk was neatly organized, and her text books neatly tucked under her desk. The teacher examined her and her table. “Paper in a neat pile, 2 pencils and quills, excellent; And what’s this under your desk? An FAA-H-8083-25A? I’m impressed!” He smiled, even if for just a brief moment, before his eyes fell upon Rainbow. Her paper was a mess, she had one broken pencil, no calculators... and his eyebrows dropped as he snatched up the comic book. “Oh you’ve got to be kidding me!” he scanned a piece of paper “...Rainbow Dash!” he yelled, throwing it into the trash can. He continued on surveying the class. A spitball whizzed across the room and hit Rainbow in the ear, sticking to it. “Hey Rainbow!” a stallion from the back 3 whispered loudly enough to get her attention. She turned around and her muzzle was met with another glob of paper and spit. “If you don’t stop that I will break your jaw!” she shouted much louder than she intended, and the whole class grew silent as every eye turned to her. “Ms. Dash, I’ll have you know we treat everypony in this class with the utmost respect!” “But he-“ “See me after class!” Rainbow’s ears dropped and she mumbled to herself as the stallion continued to examine the class, giving praise when proper and criticizing twice as often. “Hey Rainbow?” the mare next to her whispered. “What?” “I know those stallions, they’re bad news. Stay away from them if you can.” Rainbow Scoffed at the older mare, clearly in no mood to take advice from a pristine, prepared overachiever. “They just don’t know what they’re getting themselves into!” “I fear the same for you.” Rainbow waved that comment and leaned back in her chair, just a few more minutes and the class would be over. Since it was a half day, classes were unusually short. After a bit of time humming, tapping her hooves together, and looking around, the bell finally rang. She shot up and flew towards the door- freedom. “Ms. Dash!” a brutal voice called out, sending her back. “I specifically requested to talk to you!” Rainbow limped back towards the teacher’s desk and looked at him. He stared daggers at her back, clearly her first impression was atrocious. “How dare you threaten one of my students?” “But he-“ Rainbow thought a bit more, trying to come up with a good enough answer. When none came up, she drooped her ears and stared at the floor. The teacher knew exactly what had happened, he just wanted to see how honest, or at least how decisive, she was. After a few brutal minutes of silence, he sighed. “Get out of my sight” he commanded. She hopped off the chair and slowly went for the door. “And wipe that crud off your coat!” he added. Rainbow reached a hoof back and realized the whole back of her body was polka dotted in spitballs. Maybe if the situation intensified she would get the courage to speak up for herself, he thought. (finish this thought later) She finished it off and eyed her mug excitedly. The one thing Applejack made better than cobbler was cider. She could never be in a bad mood with some nice strong cider in her belly. She lifted the mug up to her lips and tilted it, when suddenly a massive explosion was heard and the ground jolted, sending the mug onto the ground, emptying the contents between the cracks of the pavement. Rainbow’s ears descended and her eyes teared up. The throng of ponies in the center of Ponyville, previously buzzing around like bees, stood at a standstill, heads fixed in the direction from the explosion. Inquisitively, Rainbow flew up above the market and peeked over the lines of stalls and thatched houses. Rainbow’s pupils dilated at what she saw; a massive plume of smoke rose from the direction of Canterlot. Time seemed to stand still, it could have been seconds or hours, but a bright purple flash appeared behind her. It was Twilight. “Rainbow!” She cried, clearly in some sort of distress. “We might have an emergency on our hands! By order of the mayor mare, we have to corral everypony into the fallout shelters!” Rainbow saluted and flew up into the air above the crowd. “ATTENTION EVERYPONY!” Rainbow Dash shouted in a commanding voice. “BY ORDERS OF THE MAYOR MARE, EVERYPONY IS TO EVACUATE TO THE NEAREST NUCLEAR FALLOUT BUNKER; WHICH FOR THIS AREA IS THE BASEMENT OF THE LIBRARY!” Rainbow flew a few blocks forward and repeated. “ATTENTION EVERYPONY!” Rainbow Dash shouted in a commanding voice. “BY ORDERS OF THE MAYOR MARE, EVERYPONY IS TO EVACUATE TO THE NEAREST NUCLEAR FALLOUT BUNKER; WHICH FOR THIS AREA IS THE BASEMENT OF THE LIBRARY!” She rubbed her throat, as all this shouting was starting to hurt it. She informed everypony to keep following a row of weather ponies armed with flight marshaling batons, after which Twilight teleported her to herself. The room was a bit dark, not because the lighting was inadequate but because the walls were such a dreary post-apocalyptic color, as if the world ended and this bunker was the last thing to survive, upon which it turned inside out and wound up here. “Rainbow I need you to man the projector” Twilight commanded, handing Rainbow a tape. “What is it?” Rainbow asked, the only description on the cassette was a blue circle with a white triangle inside of it, inscribed on the triangle in red were the letters “CD”. “It’s just some old movie for foals we are mandated to show. Just put it in...” Rainbow reluctantly obliged, and inserted the tape into the projector.
Pinkie PiePinkie Pie began her morning as usual, mashing her face into a cake before even getting out of bed. As she lapped the frosting off her forehead with her tongue that really shouldn’t stretch that far, she saw a big red circle around the date; this was the day she would throw Sweetie Belle a party, for what she didn’t know, nor did she really care. A careful observer could also point out that almost each day was circled in bright red on her calendar. She bounced precariously down the stairs to the main shop floor and into the kitchen where she ate about half the Cakes’ inventory for the day, a necessary sacrifice for adopting the unstable pink pony. She scarfed down in nearly an instant 30 multicolored cupcakes, a small red velvet cake with chocolate frosting, and topped it off with a large helping of fruit punch. “Ah what a wonderful sunny day!” she marveled, as the sun gently beat down on her rich pink coat and she looked up at the dark blue sky, completely cloudless, and silently thanked Dash for not oversleeping. She wasn’t necessarily lazy, she just sometimes gets so overconfident that she doesn’t give herself enough time to get her work done, but in reality she has a great track record, or else she wouldn’t be leading the finest weather team in the Ponyville area. A shouting broke her silent bliss. “And don’t come back until you learn some manners!” “Fine! Good luck living in our apartment without me!” “I’m the one always paying the bills and cleaning your dry necessities off the toilet seat!” “Girls, girls! There’s no need to fight! Maybe Aunt Pinkie can fix your problems!” “Well, can you make Lyra have some manners and a sense of order?” “Bon Bon is just being a cranky bitch, don’t mind her.” Lyra said, walking off down the street. “Wait! You don’t have to go! Pinkie can make everypony feel better!” Pinkie shouted, as Lyra silently rounded the corner. “That mare needs to go see a doctor...” Bon Bon said angrily, slamming the door. “Doctor? Oh no! I completely forgot!” Pinkie fumbled out from behind her three cupcake balloons and tied them around herself, as she hastily pawed at the air, trying to get to the doctor as quickly as possible without being normal. * By the time Pinkie made it to the Doctor’s office 2 blocks away, almost an hour had passed. She untied her cupcake balloons and let them float up into the air and she went down the stairs to get to the front door. She let herself in and signed herself in with the receptionist. “Mrs. Pie, the doctor wants to see you.” The receptionist called out some seconds after Pinkie sat down, slightly nettling her to have to stand right back up, but she put on a smile nevertheless and bounced into one of the rooms. “Alright, Pie comma Pinkie, let’s quickly check your blood pressure...” the doctor said strapping a device onto her foreleg that buzzed and squeezed her, like a little creature hugging her. “Not bad, mmmhmm over 70...” The doctor mumbled, scribbling his thoughts onto a clipboard just like Twilight likes to do. Maybe she wants to be a doctor? Pinkie’s thought was interrupted. “...and now for your booster shots.” Her blood pressure skyrocketed. “Heh, don’t worry Pinkie, it’s nothing to... Where’d you go?” * Pinkie was hauled back into the room by two muscular security guards, kicking and screaming. “NOOO! DON’T DO IT! SERIOUSLY! NO PLEASE!” She yells with closed eyes! “I SWEAR IF YOU STICK A NEEDLE IN ME I WILL-“ “Pinkie, I’m done...” the doctor said, holding an empty syringe, placing a childish band-aid with humans on it on her foreleg where the injection was made. Pinkie rubbed her foreleg gingerly, feeling violated, and was led out into the hall by a nurse for a few minutes to weigh her and check her height and her reflexes. The nurse hummed and scribbled on her clipboard, after which she held it up and showed Pinkie the results. “Not bad Pinkie. You are here” she said, pointing a hoof to a red dot at the top and end of the growth curve. “Your weight is fine in proportion to your height, but be careful because you’re a grown mare now and your body-“ “Uh, Pinkie?” The doctor called back into the hall. “I think you should see this.” Pinkie happily hopped back into the office and plopped her flank onto a chair. “I did some blood tests and it appears you have... diabetes.” The doctor said melancholically. Pinkie’s smile slowly dropped down to her legs. “I have... diabeetus?” “Diabetes, yes.” “D- d- diabeetus?” “It means you can’t eat sweets anymore or else your pancreas will implode.” “How do you know?” “Well for one...” the doctor began condescendingly. “We found bits of frosting in your blood stream.” Pinkie stood up and left the room; she needn’t hear any more. “Wait, don’t you want to hear about your treatment options? A free diabetes cookbook?” A drop of her puffy hair and a desaturation of her coat answered the question for him. In an adjacent room an old gray stallion sat with a cane against his hips. Another doctor with the same standard clipboard entered the room and stood before the old stallion. "Well it appears your blood work is all clear, but you have a slight anemic issue, and laying off the sweets just a bit might fix that right up." "Sweets?" the old stallion barked. "I can't have sweets on account of my diabetes!" The doctor, puzzled, flipped through his clipboard. "What diabetes?" * She dragged herself back into the waiting room right into two golden eyes. “Hi pinkie! Good news! There were rumors I was mentally handicapped floating around, but the doctors did some tests, and it turn out I just have a lazy eye! How embarrassing! But also I think I sprained a wing just now which isn’t good...” Derpy noticed the defeated look on Pinkie’s face. “Is something wrong?” “Yes, Derpy, I have diabeetus.” “Oh, Pinkie! Do you need a hug?” “Yes please...” she requested, short on breath, and hugged Derpy, tears streaming from her eyes. The words of the doctor rang through her head. “You can’t eat sweets.... can’t eat sweets... can’t sweets.... sweets....” “Ummm Pinkie... you can let go now...” Derpy offered after a hug that seemed to last 5 minutes. Pinkie kept sobbing in her self-pity on Derpy’s shoulder until she was suddenly interrupted by an ear-piercing rumble as the building shook and the lights went out. Pinkie set her pity aside and ran out the door in a severely exaggerated panic, which was completely unnecessary but infallibly characteristic of Pinkie. * Everypony on the street was silent, looking frantically around to try to understand what just happened. Pinkie was in her usual panic mode, but was tuned out by the masses, until a quiet murmur rang through the crowd, as word went around as to what happened. Lyra, who happened to be in the crowd, gasped and galloped at full speed towards the police station. A cover of buildings disabled most from scanning from where the source came from, but a few pegasi were on the roofs of buildings, staring in awe at the source of the loud boom. Pinkie was too busy screaming and panicking to participate in the spreading of the word, it was only until Applejack, who happened to be nearby, stuffed a hoof in her mouth, the universal sign of “shut up”. “mffmmummmfgh mff mumpff?” “Ah’ll tell you what’s happnin if’n you just stop s-“ “ATTENTION EVERYPONY!” Rainbow Dash shouted in a commanding voice. “BY ORDERS OF THE MAYOR MARE, EVERYPONY IS TO EVACUATE TO THE NEAREST NUCLEAR FALLOUT BUNKER; WHICH FOR THIS AREA IS THE BASEMENT OF THE LIBRARY!” She rubbed her throat and flew off farther to continue yelling, while another pegasus pony with orange flight line marshaling batons guided the sparse crowd in the direction of the library. “ThisissoexcitingweareallgoingtoTwilight’streelibraryhousethingandTwilightwillbethereandSpikeand... *GASP* WE WILL ALL HAVE A SLEEPOVER!” Pinkie spat out, causing Applejack to cringe at her awkwardly. “Sugarcube, you’re fine and dandy, but do you think you might be able to take this situation a bit more seriously?” They stepped over the threshold of the door and entered the library, inside which the cool air blew onto them, cooling their bodies, the sweat beading on their foreheads disappearing. “Everypony, may I have your attention, please?” Twilight asked at the crowd. The banter died down to light mumbling. “Mayor Mare has asked that everypony stay calm and do not leave the shelter as there is evidence of immediate danger.” About half of the room gasped when they heard this, some of them who had heard rumors began prematurely confirming them and passing them on. “Now, I want you all to stay calm and-“ “IS PONYVILLE UNDER ATTACK?” one mare screamed. “Ummm, by orders of the city I can’t reveal-“ “MY FILLY IS OUTSIDE!” a stallion cried desperately. “Should anyone be outside, a weather pony will escort them to the nearest fallout shelter, which may not be this one, however everypony will be reunited soon-“ “MOMMY!” one colt screamed, and everypony broke into a loud riot, trampling and running hysterically. Pinkie took out a bag of cake batter which she had stashed in one of the walls and started flinging it around, covering the surrounding ponies in a layer of lemon-flavored goo. An ear-piercing whistle broke the mob. “EVERYPONY! PLEASE!” Rainbow yelled. “We have to show you this!” A screen flickered and grains of monochromatic sand pattered the screen, until a circle with the number 4 on it appeared, and slowly wedged away until a 3 appeared, followed by a 2, and then a 1, and then a black and white movie with a turtle wearing a white helmet and a chorus accompanied by a piano began. “Dum dum, dee doo dum dum, dee doo dum dum, dee doo dum dum...” “Oh boy a car-“ Pinkie began, but a hoof in her mouth silenced her. “There was a turtle by the name of Bert” The chorus sang. “And Bert the Turtle was very alert.” Suddenly a monkey with a stick of lit dynamite appeared on the screen. “When danger threatened him he never got hurt; he knew just what to do!” *pop* the dynamite detonated, just as Bert the Turtle hid himself inside his shell. “He’d duck... and cover; he’d duck... and cover. He did what we all must learn to do; You, and you, and you, and you. Duck... and coveeeeeer.” The chorus then began to sing “doo doo doo doo doo to the same tune quietly as a narrator began to speak over. “Be sure to remember what Bert the Turtle just did, everypony, because every one of us must learn to do the same thing. That’s what this film is all about.” Right as he said that, the words “Duck and Cover” appeared on the screen covering Bert hiding in his shell. “Duck and Cover” The narrator continued. “This is an official Civil Defense film produced in cooperation with the Imperial Civil Defense Administration (ICDA), and the consultation with the safety commission of the Imperial Education Association. Produced by Equine Productions, Inc. Hey Bert! Come on out and meet all these nice ponies!” Bert still hid in his shell, and his eyes oscillated from side to side within his shell, showing he had no desire of leaving his shell. “Alright, we really can’t blame you. You see, Bert is a very very careful fellow...” he said, as Bert snatched up his helmet and returned it to his head. “When there’s danger, this is the way he keeps from being hurt. Sometimes, it even saves his life.” The screen faded to a scene of school-aged foals at their desks, with a stallion teaching the class. “That’s why these colts and fillies are practicing to duck and cover, just as you do at your place of shelter. We all know that the world is very dangerous. Since it might turn against us, we must get ready for it, just as we are ready for many other dangers that are around us all the time. Fire is a danger, it can burn whole buildings if somepony is careless.” The scene shifted to a burning building and a firepony sliding down a fire pole. “But we are ready for fires. We have a fine fire department to put out the fire, and you have fire drills so you know what to do. Now, we must be ready for a new dangeaughpffff....” the narrator died down as the screen flickered and died, and the projector huffed and whizzed and spat out black stuff that wound into a ball. “Well that was interesting...” Twilight said, sitting on her flank, staring unamused at what she had just seen.” “Oh poor Bert the Turtle!” Pinkie shouted. “SO WE ARE UNDER ATTACK!” A pony shouted. “Everypony stay calm, we don’t know for sure!” Rainbow yelled, fumbling with the projector.
Lyra HeartstringsLyra’s day, or rather, morning-so-early-the-sun-has-barely-come-up began as usual, on the computer, looking up humans. The whirring from the monitor woke up Bon Bon, who tried rolling over to make the sound go away, but eventually regained consciousness and felt like punching somepony for waking her up at... 6:30 in the morning. “Lyuura!” *ahem* “LYRA!” she yelled. “What could you possibly be doing this early in the morning?” She hopped up and examined her screen. Lyra quickly closed out of her tab, only to be confronted with more and more tabs, so she just quickly closed them all. “Porn.” She said. “Really... really hardcore coltcuddling.” “Mhmmm... I see you also changed the background.” She clicked the desktop settings and noticed there were over 100 pictures of all things human set to change every 30 seconds. “Lyra, at first I thought you were kidding, but this really scares me.” “There is absolutely NOTHING wrong with liking humans.” “For a 6 year old, sure. But for a 19 year old mare to wake up at 6-“ “4 actually” “Fine 4- wait, WHAT? So you woke up at 4 in the morning to look up humans?” Bon Bon reopened the browser and examined the history. She had recently closed a photobucket page, a deviantart, 5 different Earth Daily pages, with plushy compilations, drawings, and something called fapfics. “Lyra... what does fap mean?” “Well you see, it’s like clopping, except humans have hands, so-“ Bon Bon facehoofed. “WHY DO YOU DO THIS?” “Seriously, just watch the first few episodes!” “I already heard the intro, that’s enough for me.” “But the intro doesn’t do it any justice! Of course if you haven’t seen anything else the intro would turn you away!” “Lyra, NO. And stop being so... weird.” “So I shouldn’t watch humans? Please, tell me what else I can’t enjoy based on your tastes.” Lyra snapped back. “Look, just... I can’t even talk to you. First the sitting, then the emotional breakdowns because you realized you can never fulfill your special talent because you can’t play a lire, and now this bull. I don’t even know why I live with you!” “Because” Lyra said. “I am a fun, carpe-diem, happy unicorn, while you are a boring, snobby, bitchy earth pony. I complete you.” “UGH! THAT’S IT!” Bon Bon raged, as she headbutted Lyra out of the front door to the building. “And don’t come back until you learn some manners!” “Fine! Good luck living in our apartment without me!” “I’m the one always paying the bills and cleaning your dry necessities off the toilet seat!” “Girls, girls! There’s no need to fight! Maybe Aunt Pinkie can fix your problems!” Pinkie cried out from across the street. “Well, can you make Lyra have some manners and a sense of order?” “Bon Bon is just being a cranky bitch, don’t mind her.” Lyra said, walking off down the street. “Wait! You don’t have to go! Pinkie can make everypony feel better!” Pinkie shouted, as Lyra silently rounded the corner. “Bon Bon thinks I can’t go on without her. Pfffff. I’ve been kicked out of her side of the bed before, I’ve been forced to sleep on the couch before, how much more different can this be?” Lyra sat down and laid herself down on the sidewalk, against a red brick wall that was the building adjacent to her old home. A chill ran up her spine as she felt the cold, hard, lifeless concrete press against her chest, and she shot up off the floor. “This might actually suck” she thought to herself. * Walking around town for half an hour was taking its toll. Lyra limped groggily, she didn’t get much sleep after all, and her stomach ached and rumbled from the hunger it had amassed. But at 7 in the morning, few ponies were up, nevertheless at their concession stands stocked with food. There was one pony, however, who always got up extra early to catch the early birds, and collaterally those who got kicked out at 6:30: Applejack. “Well howdy there, sugarcube. Can Ah get y’all anything to eat? We got Apple pies, apple fritters, apple dumplings, apple crisps, apple crumble, Apple Brown Bettie, Dutch apple pie, candied apples on a stick, apple turnovers, apple cobbler, apple cider-“ Lyra slammed down 10 bits on the stand. “Yes please!” she sighed eagerly, her tongue nearly rolling out of her muzzle and onto the cobblestone pavement. After emptying Applejack of her fritters, her favorite confectionery, she sat on a concrete wall dividing the sidewalk from a property and began to eat. At first she maintained the slightest bit of manners, but after realizing there was no Bon Bon to tell her to chew with her mouth closed and to use utensils, she dug her face in and ate liberally. “Freedom” she thought, echoing through her head. So what if she won’t be with her closest friend ever anymore? She can make more! “Fluttershy!” she thought, and sped off, tossing her paper plate at a trashcan, missing entirely, and not giving a buck. * Upon Lyra’s arrival, Fluttershy was mending a fence post. “Hi Lyra! “Hi Fluttershy.” She said, and sat down on a log. “Oh dear, Lyra, doesn’t it hurt your back the way you’re sitting?” “No...?” “Why did you decide to pay me a visit, if you don’t mind me asking.” “I got into a fight with Bon Bon... again.” “Oh you poor thing! Tell me about your day.” Fluttershy flew over to Lyra and gently sat on the log with her and extended a hoof around her neck. * “Ok well I’ll be going now, maybe Bon Bon came back to her senses.” “No problem, you are welcome any time” Fluttershy affirmed, closing her eyes and smiling. Lyra trotted back to town, retracing her steps as best as she could
Rainbow DashSoarin unlocked the door to his suite in the Grand Swan hotel where he was staying after the air show, and held it open to let his #1 fan in, quietly shutting it and locking all the locks on the door, to ensure they wouldn’t be disturbed. “Wow...” she said, flicking her rainbow mane out of her eyes. “This place is amazing!” She took a few steps, giving herself a hasty tour of the place. There was a heart-shaped indoor jacuzzi, a large sofa folded out and topped with a water mattress, in front of a huge black flat screen TV on top of a pedestal that opened to a minibar, outfitted with every drink imaginable, from sarsaparilla to hard cider, which Rainbow closely eyed. The floor was covered in a soft, shaggy red carpet, the walls an off-white, hinting at orange, and the light dimmed just to allow the room to be viewed. Soarin unzipped his skintight flight suit and shed it onto the floor, and Rainbow squealed like the fan girl they both knew she was at the sight of her hero sans clothes. Soarin took out two ciders, instinctively knowing what Rainbow was eyeing, and tossed one to Rainbow. He took the two wine glasses that lay upside-down on top of the minibar and filled them with cider until the foam nearly spilled over the edge, Rainbow the whole time staring intently at his large, muscular body lying beside her. He handed her the glass and she happily took it, and slowly but surely finished the glass. They both let out little burps and giggled, and they returned the glasses to the mini-fridge. Rainbow wiped her muzzle with her hoof and locked eyes with Soarin, just as his head shot forward and their lips met. His tongue shot inside her mouth, still with the strong flavor of the cider they’d just had together. She closed her eyes and exhaled passionately as he explored her tongue. He pulled out and she opened her eyes to see him right on top of her, his wings fanned out, shading her body from the lights above him with their great size and beauty, each feather perfectly aligned and calibrated for the most efficient flight. She felt her wings spread out from under her, and Soarin began to stroke them, his eyes looking back into Rainbow’s twinkling eyes. “I love... your door.” Soarin said calmly. “I love you t- wait, what?” “OPEN YOUR DOOR!” he yelled in a familiar, higher-pitched voice. Rainbow flung her head up and noticed her wings were sticking out from her dream, but more importantly Derpy was knocking at her door, as a stream of water flowed into it from behind. Rainbow did a pratfall back onto her pillow, covering her eyes with her hooves. She had Derpy over at her house once in a blue moon, but never for a sleepover like she had decided last night, and now she had locked herself out of Rainbow’s room, where she had been sleeping in Rainbow’s bed which she had upgraded with the addition of a few clouds, but moreover there was a torrent of water coming from her general direction, at 6:30 in the morning. What a great way to start the day. Still groggy, she got up and opened the door, which was made of cloud, and observed derpy fumbling with the faucet. “I just don’t know wh-“ “Yeah yeah” Rainbow said, unamused, and punched the faucet into a fine mist, eliminating any problem without the need of professional plumbing. “I’m sorry Rainbow, is there anything I can do to help?” Rainbow’s eyebrows descended as she rubbed her eyes with her hooves, still trying to wake up, and forcefully pushed Derpy out of the bathroom, answering her question, and began her morning shower 2 hours early. “FUUUUUUU- YOU SPILLED OUT ALL THE HOT WATER, DERPY!” Rainbow yelled, her cries muffled by the cloud door, but amplified due to the lack of walls. * A cold, sleepy Rainbow Dash emerged from the bathroom, tossing next to the sink a brush she had just used with some rainbow colored hairs sticking out, and trotted down the stairs to the living room where Derpy was. “So what do you want for breakfast, Derpy? Wait, don’t tell me.” She handed Derpy a muffin. “Actually, it would be nice if you can make toast and jam with a cup of earl grey.” Derpy said politely under her breath. Rainbow monotonously fluttered over to her bread holder and took out a slice, and stuck it into an adjacent black cloud mounted to her counter. She gave the cloud a nice punch, sending sparks shooting throughout it, effectively toasting the bread, and handed it to Derpy along with a jar of jam which was on the table, and took the muffin for herself. At least it was blueberry, one of her favorites. * Rainbow finished half her muffin and set the rest down; she guessed she wasn’t really all that hungry. She set it on her counter and flew out of a nearby window, which was much more convenient than having to open and then close a door, and flew over Ponyville. It was Friday, June 22nd, which meant that she had to clear any low-level clouds, by anypony’s standards an order to make the day perfect. Her eyes were still a bit watery from having just woken up and now the wind rushing into them, but that never stopped Rainbow. The faster she does her job, or rather the more diligently she does it, the more free time she will have, which she already made plans of using to catch up on her napping. Naturally, Derpy was trailing close behind her, being the new mare on the weather team. She liked Dash a lot, like Scootaloo, except it nettled her that she made little effort to disguise her liking. At least Scootaloo made a conscious effort not to seem like a total fan girl; plus she had some skills to back it up which even Rainbow found pretty cool at times, she had to admit. Then, right on cue, a shiny balloon floated to the sky, and Derpy dove after it, shouting “MUFFIN MUFFIN MUFFIN!” Rainbow caught sight of a small patch of clouds hovering towards the middle of town, above Sugarcube Corner, and immediately dispatched them. “Hmm... 9.8. I must be improving!” After a quick flyby, she flew out of her patrol range and landed on a nice soft cloud. “Now, where was I?” she thought to herself. “I love you, Rainbow” Soarin said. * Rainbow and Soarin sat on a pier by the ocean, holding hands as the moon illuminated the waves before them. “It’s so beautiful!” She said, a tear forming in one of her brilliant dark pink eyes. They leaned towards each other, but what was to be the most perfect kiss ever faded as a strong, cold wind blew into her body. The wind grew so strong her eyes watered and soarin was ripped off the pier and flung far into the air. Rainbow flung her eyes open and noticed she was falling. Above her was a weather pony flying away, not even noticing her supervisor was sleeping on the cloud she just vaporized. Rainbow quickly flared her wings and stopped herself before she hit the ground, and landed softly on the grass below. “WATCH WHAT YOU’RE BUCKING YOU- GAH!.” She yelled, noticing the pegasus she was targeting was far out of range for any sort of screaming. She flung out her wings and flew at her faster than she’s gone in a while and smacked right into the pegasus, nearly knocking the wind out of her. They both landed on a cloud, the weather pegasus landed on her back, her eyes wide and her pupils contracted, stunned by what just happened. Rainbow leaned over her with a deep frown over her face, clearly upset that her perfect dream was disturbed once again. “WATCH WHAT YOU’RE BUCKING!” Rainbow yelled in her face. The pegasus slowly nodded and quickly slipped away and flew back to work, this time inspecting every cloud from all sides before bucking it to check for sleeping ponies. Content with her spontaneous disciplinary abilities, she landed back on the green fields she had perched her house over. Her stomach rumbled and she remembered her meager breakfast, and it was likely almost noon. “I guess I should get something to eat” she said to herself, and flew towards the center of Ponyville. * By noon the center of Ponyville was bustling, with farmers and turnipmongers, all yelling what they have to offer and how much for them. As she flew through the crowd, she saw a familiar hat that belonged to a good friend. “Hiya Applejack!” “Oh hey there Rainbow, glad you could drop bah! We got apple pies, apple dumplings, apple cris-“ “Actually some apple fritters sound nice!” “Hehe, you don’t say?” Applejack said defensively. “Funny story, I ran out today at 7...” “Someone bought all the- oh for Pete’s sakes. Oh well I’ll take mmm...” Rainbow scanned over the trays of food. “Some apple cobbler sounds awesome!” “Sure thing. That’ll be 2 bits, 3 if you want cider with that.” Rainbow pulled out a little tied off bag and tossed 3 bits onto the plywood counter and Applejack scooped the money up, winking, and grabbed a mug. * Rainbow sat down onto a concrete barrier across the cobblestone street where everypony seemed to be sitting and ate her apple cobbler happily. Applejack always made the best cobbler. Right as she was about to eat a familiar orange pegasus who always seemed to follow her showed up. “Hiya Rainbow!” She exclaimed, grinning widely. “Hi squirt...” Rainbow said, a bit annoyed that her much needed lunch was delayed. “Will you please tell me the story you promised to tell me?” “Wh- what story?” “Oh you know. You and I were walking past Rarity’s Boutique last Tuesday and I asked you why you came to Ponyville and you said long story so I said I have time and you said maybe later wellnowitslatersowillyoupleasetellmethestoryprettypleasepleaseplease?” Rainbow rolled her eyes and began conjuring up the story in her mind. “Well you see squirt, it all started way long ago in Cloudsdale, which is above the Everfree forest, and uh... yeah I went to school there. I was the best in my class, so to give me at least some challenge they raised me up a grade. Even though I was one of the smallest pegasi in my new classes, I was still one of the fastest.” “Ok kids, this isn’t baby school anymore. You are in the Junior Speedsters Flight Academy!” a stallion with a deep, gravelly voice yelled out to the class. “I want to see 110% from you all! If you are going to be lazy; YOU WILL FAIL! If you are going to be slow; YOU WILL FAIL! If you are going to be weak, YOU WILL FAIL! If you don’t do your homework; YOU WILL FAIL! If you take the course backwards; YOU WILL FAIL! Should you opt out of this course, you will be offered it again in the following year; upon which YOU WILL FAIL!” All the ponies stared at their new teacher blankly and wide-eyed, except for 3 stallions at the back of the room, who were giggling and shooting spitballs at each other. “As a matter of fact, I can tell right away who are going to be my top students, and who are going to be miserable fruit shop owners for the rest of your bloody lives!” Rainbow leaned back in her seat and apprehensively surveyed her desk: Scattered looseleaf, a broken pencil, and a comic book. She wondered why she even brought that to class. She looked at the yellow mare sitting next to her. She hadn’t received her cutie mark yet, either. Her desk was neatly organized, and her text books neatly tucked under her desk. The teacher examined her and her table. “Paper in a neat pile, 2 pencils and quills, excellent; And what’s this under your desk? An FAA-H-8083-25A? I’m impressed!” He smiled, even if for just a brief moment, before his eyes fell upon Rainbow. Her paper was a mess, she had one broken pencil, no calculators... and his eyebrows dropped as he snatched up the comic book. “Oh you’ve got to be kidding me!” he scanned a piece of paper “...Rainbow Dash!” he yelled, throwing it into the trash can. He continued on surveying the class. A spitball whizzed across the room and hit Rainbow in the ear, sticking to it. “Hey Rainbow!” a stallion from the back 3 whispered loudly enough to get her attention. She turned around and her muzzle was met with another glob of paper and spit. “If you don’t stop that I will break your jaw!” she shouted much louder than she intended, and the whole class grew silent as every eye turned to her. “Ms. Dash, I’ll have you know we treat everypony in this class with the utmost respect!” “But he-“ “See me after class!” Rainbow’s ears dropped and she mumbled to herself as the stallion continued to examine the class, giving praise when proper and criticizing twice as often. “Hey Rainbow?” the mare next to her whispered. “What?” “I know those stallions, they’re bad news. Stay away from them if you can.” Rainbow Scoffed at the older mare, clearly in no mood to take advice from a pristine, prepared overachiever. “They just don’t know what they’re getting themselves into!” “I fear the same for you.” Rainbow waved that comment and leaned back in her chair, just a few more minutes and the class would be over. Since it was a half day, classes were unusually short. After a bit of time humming, tapping her hooves together, and looking around, the bell finally rang. She shot up and flew towards the door- freedom. “Ms. Dash!” a brutal voice called out, sending her back. “I specifically requested to talk to you!” Rainbow limped back towards the teacher’s desk and looked at him. He stared daggers at her back, clearly her first impression was atrocious. “How dare you threaten one of my students?” “But he-“ Rainbow thought a bit more, trying to come up with a good enough answer. When none came up, she drooped her ears and stared at the floor. The teacher knew exactly what had happened, he just wanted to see how honest, or at least how decisive, she was. After a few brutal minutes of silence, he sighed. “Get out of my sight” he commanded. She hopped off the chair and slowly went for the door. “And wipe that crud off your coat!” he added. Rainbow reached a hoof back and realized the whole back of her body was polka dotted in spitballs. Maybe if the situation intensified she would get the courage to speak up for herself, he thought. (finish this thought later) She finished it off and eyed her mug excitedly. The one thing Applejack made better than cobbler was cider. She could never be in a bad mood with some nice strong cider in her belly. She lifted the mug up to her lips and tilted it, when suddenly a massive explosion was heard and the ground jolted, sending the mug onto the ground, emptying the contents between the cracks of the pavement. Rainbow’s ears descended and her eyes teared up. The throng of ponies in the center of Ponyville, previously buzzing around like bees, stood at a standstill, heads fixed in the direction from the explosion. Inquisitively, Rainbow flew up above the market and peeked over the lines of stalls and thatched houses. Rainbow’s pupils dilated at what she saw; a massive plume of smoke rose from the direction of Canterlot. Time seemed to stand still, it could have been seconds or hours, but a bright purple flash appeared behind her. It was Twilight. “Rainbow!” She cried, clearly in some sort of distress. “We might have an emergency on our hands! By order of the mayor mare, we have to corral everypony into the fallout shelters!” Rainbow saluted and flew up into the air above the crowd. “ATTENTION EVERYPONY!” Rainbow Dash shouted in a commanding voice. “BY ORDERS OF THE MAYOR MARE, EVERYPONY IS TO EVACUATE TO THE NEAREST NUCLEAR FALLOUT BUNKER; WHICH FOR THIS AREA IS THE BASEMENT OF THE LIBRARY!” Rainbow flew a few blocks forward and repeated. “ATTENTION EVERYPONY!” Rainbow Dash shouted in a commanding voice. “BY ORDERS OF THE MAYOR MARE, EVERYPONY IS TO EVACUATE TO THE NEAREST NUCLEAR FALLOUT BUNKER; WHICH FOR THIS AREA IS THE BASEMENT OF THE LIBRARY!” She rubbed her throat, as all this shouting was starting to hurt it. She informed everypony to keep following a row of weather ponies armed with flight marshaling batons, after which Twilight teleported her to herself. The room was a bit dark, not because the lighting was inadequate but because the walls were such a dreary post-apocalyptic color, as if the world ended and this bunker was the last thing to survive, upon which it turned inside out and wound up here. “Rainbow I need you to man the projector” Twilight commanded, handing Rainbow a tape. “What is it?” Rainbow asked, the only description on the cassette was a blue circle with a white triangle inside of it, inscribed on the triangle in red were the letters “CD”. “It’s just some old movie for foals we are mandated to show. Just put it in...” Rainbow reluctantly obliged, and inserted the tape into the projector.
