It was only when he had taken the collar off from around his neck that he realized just how sore he was.
Big Macintosh cranked his neck to the left and right, and a sound similar to that of a hoof crushing a can reverberated around the barn. He winced as thin bands of heat traveled up and down his spine before subsiding mere moments later. With the work collar wrapped around his front leg, he walked over to the rack and set it onto a hook before going back outside, shutting the heavy door behind him with a kick of his back hoof.
The breeze actually helped at this time of day, when the sun was not hanging directly overhead and dead-set on turning the dirt into dust. It cooled the sheen of sweat over his back and forehead, causing his aching muscles to tense up reflexively. He sauntered over to the farmhouse’s back entrance with eyes set on a spigot fastened into the wall. When he reached it, he turned the squeaky knob slightly to the left until a thin stream of water trickled out. He had to crouch to get his mouth under the stream, letting the lukewarm water coat his parched tongue. Droplets splashed messily over his nose and snout, forcing his eyes shut, but he took several gulps of water before finally turning the spigot off.
“Y’know, ya could’ve just gone inside. We’ve got ice an’ everything.”
A voice from behind startled him. However, its familiarity put him at ease before he even turned around. Sure enough, his sister Applejack stood a couple of steps away from him, fanning herself with her stetson hat. She was in the same shape as he was, her mane stuck to her shoulder from sweat. A bit of redness from the sun’s rays showed itself around her eyes. She smiled. He smiled back.
“Nah. That’s alright, sis.” He shook his head, albeit a little sheepishly. Applejack put the hat back on her head and raised an eyebrow.
“Why not? You in some kind o’ rush or somethin’?” she asked. An amused smirk accompanied the question. Big Mac nodded.
“Eeyup.” He pointed to the sun, which was already flirting with the horizon. “It’s gettin’ late. Flutters might get worried, ‘specially since m— well, you know...”
He trailed off, biting his lip. Fortunately, his averted gaze seemed to communicate all that was necessary to his sister, who nodded her head with understanding.
“Ohh. Well, alright, then.” She walked by him and stood on the back step, one hoof cracking the door open. “You make sure you take care of yourself, Mac. And y’know, if you want, you could take tomorrow off if it’s really botherin’ you. I don’t mind workin’ extra. You know that.”
Her eyebrow raised again, only this time it was with concern. Nonetheless, Big Mac was quick to wave away the offer.
“Nope,” he said. “I’m fine. If I was really hurt, y’all would know it.”
Applejack grimaced. She opened her mouth to speak, but it fell back shut. Big Mac pursed his lips, and took an awkward step in the other direction, crossing his front legs over one another. Applejack’s ears drooped a bit, but she nodded once.
“Alright.” She sighed. “Well… I’ll see you tomorrow, Big Mac… or not. I meant what I said.”
Big Mac looked her in the eye. Her unblinking gaze was intense, but she spoke gently. He reached out to her with a hoof, and with a light chuckle, she stepped down from the door and gave him a hug. She was careful not to squeeze him too tightly. When they had let go, Big Mac waved farewell and walked around the side of the house, disappearing from view. Applejack grinned as a glimmer of mischief shone in her eyes.
“And don’t forget to take a bath!” she called out after him. The corners of her lips stretched out in a playful smile.
“Speak for yourself!” his distant voice shouted back. Applejack clenched her teeth together to suppress a laugh. She couldn’t see his face, but she knew him well enough to know that he must have been smiling, too.
Brushing strands of her mane out of her face, she stepped inside and let the door swing shut.
…
Only the top sliver of the sun remained on the horizon by the time Big Mac could see the glow in the window of Fluttershy’s cottage. He took a deep breath, hooves plodding slowly and methodically over the hard ground. After an entire day of kicking tree trunks, even the tiny impacts were starting to cause twinges of pain in his shoulders and lower back. He ignored them with a grunt.
Now that he was on the edge of the Everfree Forest, the wind amplified through the leaves of the trees, sounding like raw rice being poured through a plastic tube. He sucked in a breath of the rapidly cooling air, closing his eyes momentarily as he approached the door.
A couple of chickens wandered the yard outside of their coop, clucking and pecking at the ground. Taking note, he turned the knob until it clicked and pushed the door open.
“Hi, Flutters,” he said. He cupped a hoof around his mouth. “I’m home!”
His voice apparently startled a small white rabbit laying curled up on the sofa, directly across from the door. His head shot up from underneath his front legs, and his two beady black eyes gazed up at him without a blink. Big Mac smiled slightly.
“Hi, Angel,” he greeted. Angel’s whiskers drooped, staring back at Big Mac with one of his trademark irritated pouts; it was obvious to Big Mac that he’d just wakened him up from a nap. However, in his usual wordless way, he showed his co-owner enough courtesy to do a little wave back at him with his floppy ear before laying his head back down on the sofa cushion. Big Mac smiled.
“Sorry,” he said. Angel shrugged it off with a sigh, and closed his eyes. Fortunately, the awkward stage of mistrust and over-protectiveness on the ornery little bunny’s part had already passed, replaced with a healthy sense of respect. The feeling was mutual; Big Mac made sure never to sit in Angel’s favorite spot on the sofa, and Angel made sure never to bother them at night when the bedroom door was closed. Everyone knew their place.
The soft clopping of hoofsteps could be heard from upstairs. Hearing them, He stepped into the living room and let the door close behind him. He called out again, “Fluttershy? You there, hun?”
Again, he waited. There was no immediate reply, but the hoofsteps got a little more frantic. He heard her getting closer to the stairs when he finally heard her voice.
“Oh! H-Hey, Mackie! I’m coming…”
Her voice sounded breathy, like she had just gone out for a run. She trotted down the stairs, coming into view close to the bottom. Her wings were pressed tightly against her sides, and several pink strands of her mane had drifted down in her face. As usual, she wasted no time in bridging the gap between them.
“Sorry! I was just… nevermind…” She hugged him around his withers, pressing the side of her face against his neck. He smelled fresh perfume in her mane, a sweet, citrus scent which caught his attention. He’d actually never smelled it before. “How did it go today? You’re back pretty late…”
Big Mac hugged her back, wincing a bit as her hoof wrapped around his sore neck. A hot band of dull pain flared up just below his upper back. All it took was a twitch of his shoulder, and he felt her grip turn to a wet noodle around him. Her ears folded back.
“Oh! Um, sorry, I didn’t mean… are you okay?” she asked. She pulled away, looking him right in the eye. Big Mac nodded, but he averted his gaze to the floor.
“Eeyup. I’m fine.” He felt her hoof under his chin, and he let her pull his face up until they were face to face again. “And everything went fine today. We’ve gotten most of the Braeburn apples in buckets, so tomorrow shouldn’t be too bad.”
She pecked him on the lips, but when she pulled away, her pupils were still narrowed with concern.
“Okay… Are you sure you’re alright? You look… exhausted.” Her voice dropped in pitch. She almost sounded… disappointed. “I…I could give you a massage if that would make you feel better?”
Big Mac’s ears stood up straight at her offer. She gave him a sweet smile, her front hooves crossed in front of her. The knot in his back tightened at the word, and he nearly nodded his head.
“Ee…”
But just before he could agree, Big Mac froze in the middle of the word, stopping himself just before he could bob his head up and down. As much as he wanted to accept the offer, he couldn’t let her know it was bad enough to warrant needing a massage. And against all of what he knew about his wife, a small part of him almost felt like the question was some kind of test, designed to trap him in the web of his own lies…
After much mental deliberation, he answered.
“…nope. I’m fine, Fluttershy. But thank you.” He looked her right in the eye with a resolute stare.
What he wasn’t fully expecting, however, was for her to meet it head on, the lids of her eyes narrowed. He knew that look: suspicion, mixed with fear and concern. It was a look that told him that she could be something other than gentle. He gulped.
He did not have to suffer under her stare for long, however. Expression softening, Fluttershy leaned forward and nuzzled him on the cheek.
“Okay.” She stepped off to the side, heading over to the fireplace stove with a deep exhale. “If you say so. Just… just let me know if it’s really acting up again, okay? The doctor said to be careful, you know.”
It was Big Mac’s turn to let the air out of his lungs. He nodded with understanding.
“I know.” His voice was level. A nervous frown showed itself on his face now that she wasn’t looking. “It’ll be fine.”
Fluttershy did not respond. She eyed a thick cast iron pot which sat stoically on the burner. Tendrils of steam climbed up toward the ceiling and out the chimney, and the faint plopping of bubbles could be heard broiling underneath the lid. As Big Mac followed her over, a pleasant, spicy aroma made his ears stand up straight. Some of the built up tension in his stomach ebbed away at the sight, and he grinned.
“Wow, Fluttershy. That smells good.” He watched her take the lid off and set it on the counter. She reeled back with a timid squeak as a column of steam whooshed upward, narrowly missing her face.
“Aah! Oh, my… I guess I probably left it on a little longer than I was supposed to…” She wiped some of the condensation off her forehead. A big ladle lay propped up against the wall, which she grabbed hold of and set gently inside the pot. “Things have just been kinda… um, hectic, today. It’s your favorite, though. Hearty vegetable medley. I also put in a little extra cayenne pepper in there for you. I know you like that.”
This made Big Mac’s smile widen. He sidled up next to her and gave her an appreciative kiss on the back of her neck. Her cheeks flushed pink, but apart from a slow smile, she didn’t react.
“Thank you, sweetheart.” He looked to the outer edge of the fireplace, noticing a single white bowl lying on the brick. He raised an eyebrow. “Aren’t you gonna have any?”
Fluttershy took a step back. She shook her head. “No, no, I’m… I’ve already eaten.” She retreated back a couple more steps, drawing her husband’s confused gaze. “You came back pretty late again, you know. Anyway, I’ve gotta… Oh, no.”
She shot over to the window, looking out at the chickens who were loose in the yard. She buried her head in her hoof.
“Oh my goodness, I forgot to put the chickens back in the henhouse!” she said, slapping herself in the forehead. “Ohh, and it’s almost dark already! How could I have forgotten that?”
Big Mac watched her scamper over to the door and fling it open. Before she darted out, she said over her shoulder, “You go on ahead and eat, Mack. I’ll be back in… I’ll be back later!”
And with that, the door slammed shut. The faint sound of clucking came in through the cottage’s wooden walls.
Big Mac didn’t touch the pot of soup for quite some time. He just stared at the closed door, worry evident on his wrinkled brow. He chewed on his lip out of nervous habit, much in the same way he often chomped on a stem of wheat while working out in the field.
He turned over to Angel, to see the bunny still lying on the sofa with his head resting on the cushion. Angel regarded him with a passing glance, but otherwise remained where he was, head rested between his forearms.
With a shrug, Big Mac dipped the ladle into the pot.
…
Big Mac had eaten quickly. Fluttershy’s soup had been spot on: spicy, savory, and completely delicious. He’d made sure to put the lid back on the pot and put the rest into their new icebox; he never let her clean up after him if he could help it.
The shower was his thinking zone; the hot water coursing down his head and over his shoulders never failed to put him at ease. His sister Applejack had often teased him about how long he sometimes took when they were foals, always making sure she got first shower to make sure he didn’t use up all the hot water.
He reflected upon earlier. Images of her disheveled mane, as well as the way she seemed to scamper back in forth in an unusual, scatterbrained frenzy, all came to mind. The strong scent of perfume, like she was going out to town…
Big Mac placed a forehoof on the shower wall and shook his head slowly, ribbons of water wrapping around the sides of his face and running off his chin. He was not much for conversations… neither was she, really… but he knew should say something. There was something odd about her behavior, that much was for sure. But when it came thinking about which words he was going to say, his tongue went dry. He didn’t want to make things more awkward than they already were…
It was only when the water began to cool down on its own accord when Big Mac decided to get out of the tub. Fortunately, he knew Fluttershy had a preference for colder showers, so he did not feel bad about wasting hot water. He reached back and turned the handle all the way to the right and let the bath faucet drip itself dry. For a minute he just stood there, letting the water and steam circulate around him before stepping out and drying himself off. He hung the towel on the rack and took a deep breath to calm his nerves.
He would just wait for her in their room. It was possible that she was still busy doing something, and he didn’t want to wander the grounds at night looking for her if he didn’t have to. In fact, truth be told, being outside at night when he was so close to the Everfree Forest gave him the willies, though he would never tell her that.
However, when he opened the door, he was surprised to see the bulge in the covers on one side of the bed. The room was dark, and the sliver of light from the now open door illuminated her head, which stuck out from underneath the covers. Her mane was swept over her face and covered her eyes.
Big Mac hesitated in the doorway for a moment. While it was true that Fluttershy was not the type of pony to stay up late, it was still nonetheless rare to see her in bed this early. When he heard the sound of her gentle breathing combined with the stillness of her body, he surmised that she was already fast asleep. Jaw clenched out of concentration, he crept into the room and gently shut the door behind him. As he approached, he noticed the same aroma of perfume that he had before, a fruity, citrus-y scent that flooded the room. He frowned, confused curiosity making him raise an eyebrow, but did not pay it too much mind.
He contemplated waking her. But seeing her there, breathing so peacefully and sound asleep, he began to think better of it. He didn’t want to disrupt her if he didn’t have to.
First thing tomorrow morning, he reasoned. Applejack and Apple Bloom wouldn’t mind if he came to work a little later than usual. He’d have time…
Tired from the day, and expecting another one just like it tomorrow, Big Mac squeezed beneath the covers, lying flat on his belly. It was the only way he was able to get to sleep without his back flaring up underneath him.
He took a deep breath, and closed his eyes.
Ten minutes later, they were wide open once again.
From where Big Mac lay, he stared at the headboard of the bed. No matter how hard he tried to relax, his thoughts continued to drift. Closing his eyes only seemed to make it worse.
Now that he had become used to the darkness, his eyes began to wander. Granted, there wasn’t much to look at from his position, but he focused in on the heart-shaped pommels on the top of the bedposts as though he were subjecting them to intense study. But in reality, his mind was broiling.
He planned out tomorrow morning in his head. What he would say, when he would say it… and it made it impossible to get to sleep. With regret, he bit his lip.
He should have woken her up. He would have groaned, but it would have been too loud.
Frowning, he quietly moved his head so that he was looking over to his sleeping wife. All it took was one look, and in an instant, any notion of waking her up melted away. Fluttershy lay still, the covers pulled up to her neck. Her face was turned away, and through the blanket he could see her ribs rising and falling in a gentle rhythm. Peaceful…
But just then, he noticed something. Gradually, the furrows on his forehead deepened into valleys, his brow creasing downward as his eyes locked onto something peculiar, something out of place… Her ear, perked up through her thick mane, standing up straight as the promontory peak of some lonely mountain in the midst of a wavy pink sea. It was angled in his direction.
If Big Mac had been still before, he was stiffer than a wooden plank, now. His pupils, already wide from the dark, opened to twice their size. Watching more closely, he noticed her ear make the occasional twitch from side to side, like a satellite being given a slight adjustment. His breathing stayed level, but his mind was racing.
He swallowed. Although this time, he made sure to make himself as loud as possible.
Fluttershy’s ear twitched again in response. His heart beating a little harder, he brushed his foreleg over the bed, the friction between his hoof and the sheets and causing another soft noise. Her ear twitched again.
Big Mac held in a breath for a moment, scanning over her body once more. His mouth opened, but then fell back shut. Then, it opened again for a second time.
Then, he whispered, eyes still locked onto her ear, “Fluttershy?”
No sooner had he mentioned her name that her ear moved again. Only this time, it flopped back down, pressing itself tightly against her head. Big Mac’s heart did a little leap in his chest.
“Fluttershy?” he repeated, moving up from a whisper to a soft utterance. “Sweetheart? You awake?”
He watched and waited. The bulge in the bed did not move, not even in the slightest. For a moment, Big Mac wondered if she really were asleep. Or if he’d woken her up…
The bulge her body made under the covers seemed to deflate like a balloon as a defeated sigh escaped her. Then, she spoke.
“Yes…”
Her tone was like that of a foal who had been caught with their hoof in the cookie jar. Big Mac cringed slightly, not sure whether to be relieved, or apologetic.
“Oh. I… I didn’t wake you up, did I?”
He heard her expel another sigh, even longer than the first. “No… I-I’ve… I can’t sleep.” She squirmed, readjusting her head on the pillow. “I… I-I thought you were asleep, though…”
Big Macintosh smiled ruefully. He shook his head, wrinkling the pillowcase.
“Nope. I can’t either.” He scooted a little bit closer to her, wincing as the muscles in his back tightened up into a knot with the movement. “Been awake since I walked in.”
He draped his hoof around her shoulder. To his surprise, he felt her pull away slightly, scrunching up her forelegs more tightly under her chin. Feeling her tense up, Big Mac pursed his lips together.
“Everything alright?” he asked. His hoof traveled up and down the bulge in the covers, rubbing her softly through the fabric barrier. He didn’t demand an answer from her, letting the silence wash over them.
Fluttershy, meanwhile, was motionless as a rock, and about as stiff. Big Mac could feel her breathing quicken under his foreleg, and he nestled his head into her mane. This caused her muscles to tense up even more, as well as her wings to unfurl at her sides. He curled his bottom lip.
“Fluttersh—?”
“No.”
Before he could say her whole name, she at last responded. The word seemed to electrify the air around them, and her blunt reply was all it took to make the hairs on his mane stand up. Fluttershy's repeated herself. “Not really…”
And just like that, it was finally out. The bombshell had burst. While he couldn’t see her face, Big Mac could hear her begin to sniffle, a sound that was unmistakable. He closed his eyes.
“Oh. Well… I’m sorry,” he said, more out of condolence than as an apology. He wasn’t sure what to be sorry for just yet, anyway. “Do you… want to talk about it?”
Fluttershy wiped her snout, sucking in a sharp breath through her nose. She shook her head.
“I… No, no… it’s alright. It’s no big deal.” She pushed herself deeper into the blanket. “Don’t worry about me, Mackie. Just… forget I said anything, okay? I’m alright…”
Big Mac saw her retreating further into her cocoon. He peeled the blanket back down her frame, exposing her head and neck and preventing her from hiding away. She sucked in a sharp breath, her whole body going rigid with apparent fright as he lowered the blanket. Big Mac noticed.
“No, no,” he whispered. His hoof continued its soothing caress over her withers. “I can’t just forget, sweetheart. You can talk to me, it’s alright…”
“…No."
For a moment, the silence in the room was like a dense fog draped over their heads. Even the sound of quiet breathing seemed muffled. Her face contorted into a grimace, something which made Big Mac’s heart thump wildly in his chest.
“I… what?” he asked, incredulous. He already knew very well what she had said, but the shock of it made him raise his eyebrows. Fluttershy sucked in sharply through her nose, grasping the sheets with her forehooves tightly.
“I said, no.” While she didn’t raise her voice, the irritation was quite clear. It was a tone of voice Big Mac seldom heard from her; it was rare enough that it made his rubbing hoof freeze in place on her withers. He gulped.
“Oh.” He bit his lip. “I… are you s—”
“Yes, I’m sure.” She cut him off before he could finish. “I feel like I've already talked to you before…many times already. But…”
Fluttershy stopped herself mid-sentence. In the silence, Big Mac waited with anxious expectation, both ears perked straight up and angled toward her. His pulse pounded in his eardrums.
But unfortunately, she left the sentence hanging. With a shuffle of her back hooves, she rolled herself further over, and Big Mac’s hoof to fall with a plop onto the bed. She sighed like somepony who had admitted defeat.
“…I…just… just don’t worry about it,” she repeated. Her voice no longer carried with it the same irritation as before. Instead, it was timid, apologetic. “Sorry, I… I’m fine. It’s fine.”
Big Mac felt the hairs on his mane prickling. An icy chill snaked down his spine, which made him draw his hoof back into his chest. Fluttershy continued to look the other way. A bead of sweat trickled down his brow, and he felt his hooves getting clammy with concern. He swallowed hard.
It wasn’t fine. She knew it, and he knew it. He mustered up the courage to speak once more.
“I-I’m sorry, Fluttershy.” His voice was a whisper. He placed his hoof where it had been on her back, a gesture she did not shy away from. “I don’t… I don’t know what I did, b-but…”
“No, no…” Fluttershy shook her head to dismiss his worries. Her voice was louder than before, but the irritation was no longer present. “You didn’t do anything. I-It’s…I’m just… I’m just thinking about myself too much, is all.”
Big Mac’s eyebrows practically flew off of his head. The idea of Fluttershy thinking about herself too much, of all things, sounded absolutely absurd to him. His grip around her withers tightened, and he leaned his head further in.
“Thinking ab… what do you mean?”
He rubbed his cheek against the back of her head, inhaling the sweet-smelling perfume as he did so. Even through the blanket, he could feel her starting to shiver. She sighed.
“I don’t want to talk about it, Mackie.” A delicate hoof went up to wipe her eyes. “I… I don’t want to make you upset…”
“What makes you say that?” Big Mac’s voice dripped with concern. He ignored the ache in his back and propped himself up against the headboard. “You can tell me, Flutters. I promise I won’t get upset with you, no matter what it is…”
He made sure to keep his voice soft. There was no demand for an answer; he let Fluttershy quietly consider his proposal, not pushing any further.
For a while, the room was so quiet that Big Mac could hear his own heartbeat. For good measure, he resumed stroking up and down her side with his hoof in a massage, coaxing her to come out of her blanket shell.
Finally, she moved. Slowly at first, but the lump in the bed gave the appearance of a butterfly squirming around inside its chrysalis as she rolled over. Big Mac withdrew his hoof once again and scooted back, ignoring the pins and needles in his aching back from the movement. Fluttershy was now lying on her back, and she cleared her unkempt mane away from her face. She stared up at the ceiling, and gave a shuddering sigh.
“Okay,” she conceded with closed eyes. “Okay. If you really want to know.”
She clenched her teeth. Big Mac kept his mouth zipped shut as she began.
“I’m… frustrated.” She said the word in hushed tones, treating it like it was a curse. "Alright? I’m… I know I shouldn’t be, but I am. You…”
She took in a deep breath and sat up next to him against the headboard. Her front hooves kept her bottom half covered, but her wings were freed from their fabric cocoon. Fluttershy didn’t look over to him, opting instead to fix her eyes on the wall in front of her.
“….I feel like you’re never here. That you’re never home,” she said. “And when you do come home, you’re always so tired. You come home so late, and…”
For the first time, she turned her head to face him. Big Mac fought the urge to rear his head back, deciding to meet her eye to eye instead.
“…I know your back isn’t fine. You always tell me it is, b-but it isn’t. It’s getting worse.” Her eyes glimmered with fresh tears. “And I know you’re a hard worker, and that you always want to do your best, and that you have a lot of work to do…”
Big Macintosh could hear tremors in her voice, something which she resisted actively. Taking a moment to calm herself down, she spoke with her head low, wiping her eyes with the sheets.
“… and I understand that. I do. But you’re hurting yourself, Mackie. The doctor told you to take it easy after that tree branch fell on you, but… you didn’t listen.” Fluttershy’s shoulders sagged downward. “I don’t want you to hurt yourself even more. I've tried telling you, tried to get you to take it easy, but you keep saying you're fine. And I know it’s selfish of me, but…”
The self-doubt was creeping in. Big Mac could see her lips quivering, and the air around him turned to an icy mist. The chill bled through the covers.
“…I want to spend more time with you. But I… feel like you’re away, even when you’re here.” Her voice raised in pitch until it was just above a squeak. The admission made her lower her head out of guilt and shame. “And lately, I’ve been trying to do things to make you feel better, to maybe get you to... just relax. Take a break. O-or maybe make you want to… you know.”
Had the room been any darker, Big Mac would not have noticed the shade of bright red that flushed her entire face. He could practically feel the warmth radiating from her skin, and feeling it, something clicked in his brain. His jaw went slack.
The sweet-scented perfume. The way she’d looked at him when she offered him a massage, and the way she’d stood in front of him with her front legs crossed in a meek modeling pose. It all made sense, and what was more, he hadn’t even thought any of it to be strange or out of place until now. The veil of ignorance lifted, his eyes went wide with realization…
And the pain from his back went right to his heart.
“I’m sorry, Mackie. I know I’m just thinking about myself,” she said, wiping traces of mascara that had dripped down her face. “I know you need to help your family, a-and I know I’m just getting worried and anxious when I sh—”
The words died in a sharp intake of breath. Before she could finish, she felt something take a hold of her by the shoulders, lifting her bodily up from the bed.
Big Mac pulled her in close, wrapping his massive forelegs around her and ignoring his back's protests. He was careful not to press too hard against her wings, instead sliding his right hoof underneath the feathers while he cradled her head in his left. He brushed it through her long mane.
“No, Fluttershy.” A tremor underlined his voice. “Don’t be sorry. You ain’t got anything to be sorry for…”
His soft whispers reached her ears through her mane. For a moment, he felt her body go rigid against him from shock. But as his hoof rubbed up and down her back, he felt her relax, her wingfeathers fanning out over his fetlocks as he rocked her from side to side.
As soon as Fluttershy relaxed, Big Macintosh felt her chest heave against him in a sob. He hugged tighter.
“I’m so sorry, Fluttershy. I’m the one who’s been selfish. Not you…” He kissed her on the side of her neck. “I’m sorry I made you feel this way…”
He tried to soothe her as her crying amplified. He couldn’t see her face, but he could feel the hot tear droplets running down his chest. She melted against him, and he continued to plant kisses on the nape of her neck. Fluttershy was hard to understand through her cries.
“It’s okay…” Her foreleg slid out from between them and hugged him back. Big Mac felt a wave of pain from her grip, which was surprisingly strong, but he did not care. He let her hold onto him. “It’s okay, Mac…”
She rubbed the side of her face against his chest. Big Macintosh returned the gesture on the top of her head, breathing in the sweet perfume in her mane.
“No it ain’t,” he said. “It’s not okay. Oh, I’m so sorry, Fluttershy…”
Minutes went by. Fluttershy’s crying gradually died down until it was so quiet that the breeze outside sounded like howling against the cottage walls. Her warm breathing dried the tears that had dripped onto his coat.
Until, at long last, he let his hooves fall away from her, setting them down on either side of himself. With no one holding her up anymore, Fluttershy slumped back and sat down on the mattress, her tail scrunching up against the headboard. Big Mac regarded her with an apologetic stare.
With so much time to gather his thoughts, he still struggled to find the right words.
“You’re right, Fluttershy,” he said with a somber frown. “You’re right about my back. I… It’s not getting better.”
His front hoof played with the corner of the sheets as he spoke. Fluttershy’s head was low, but her eyes were looking straight at him from beneath her disheveled mane.
“I haven’t been honest with you. And I never realized how what I was doing was making you feel. How… frustrating that must be, to watch me gettin’ worse and worse. How much you must have been worried about me… But even more than that, I… I…”
He winced, his brain fighting frantically to think of what to say. When the right words did eventually pop into his head, he continued.
“I didn’t realize how… alone, you were feeling. Like I wasn’t ever home, or that I didn’t want to be around you, o-or anything like that. I love you, so much, and I’m so sorry that I ain’t shown it lately.”
Mac blinked slowly, taking a pause to collect his breath and keep his emotions in check. Then, he looked up from the bed, and his hoof ceased playing with the sheets. “C-Can you forgive me, Fluttershy?”
His eyes glistened with the light of the moon that streamed in through the bedroom window. The wait stretched on for what seemed like half the night, his heartbeat pounding in his ears.
For a time, he wondered if he had said enough, or if he had maybe said something wrong. Every second she didn’t say anything compounded the nervousness he felt, and for a brief moment he wondered if he should try and say something else…
But then, to his great relief, she nodded. Her hoof brushed her mane out of her face.
“Yes.” A quivering, simpering smile showed itself on her features. “I forgive you, Mackie. I forgive you. But…”
The last word made Mac’s heart leap into his throat. Fluttershy must have noticed a change in his expression, because she was quick to lean back into him, nestling her head under his chin.
“…You have to take a break, Big Mac. Please,” she pleaded. “It doesn’t have to be tomorrow, o-or even the next day, but… please. I’ll…” She swallowed, here. “…I’ll even come by and help, if you want. I know I have a lot to do around here, but maybe I could wake up earlier. Then that way, I could go to Sweet Apple Acres first, and mmph!”
She got no further. Before she knew what was going on, Big Mac craned his neck back and, with a lurch, his lips closed around hers in a fierce, passionate kiss. Her eyes widened into saucers, and she inhaled sharply through her nose. But the shock only lasted for a second, and soon her eyelids drifted shut as she welcomed the gesture, returning the kiss with equal vigor.
Several seconds passed before he pulled away, leaving her panting for breath. He hugged her to his chest once again, a smile that could have turned night into day plastered onto his face.
“You don’t have to beg me, Fluttershy. I will. I’ll take a break,” he said, planting another wet kiss on the side of her neck. Her wings twitched at her sides in response. “And you don’t have to do any of that… oh Flutters…” He kissed her again on the same spot. “…I love you so much…”
Fluttershy gasped as he smothered her with more kisses, inching his way up to her cheek. She grabbed onto him, hind legs squirming slightly with the pleasant tickling sensation, and she felt as though her heart would burst out of her chest. It had been a very long time since she had seen him behave this way, and the feeling brought an overjoyed smile to her lips. She craned her neck around and kissed him back on the cheek.
Reflexively, Big Mac felt the velvety softness on his cheek and turned his own head around, meeting her lips with his own. He heard her moan with pleasant surprise into his mouth, and their lips smacked loudly together. Taking both of them lower, Big Mac gently pulled her down with him, landing with a small grunt onto his back with her lying on top. The impact made the pain in his back flare up again, but he kept the pain inside, tensing up his back to fight the burn until it went away. Fluttershy pulled away from him, panting like a dog.
“…You… okay, Mackie?” she breathed out, her head resting against his shoulder. Big Mac nodded. He buried his face in her mane in an affectionate nuzzle.
“Eeyup,” he replied breathlessly. “Fine… whew…”
Every breath Big Mac took smelled like smooth citrus, his snout surrounded by the wonderful, silky hair of her mane. He grasped a hold of it and pressed it to his nose, something Fluttershy noticed right away. She giggled in between gasps of air.
“Do… you like it?” she asked. Big Macintosh grinned broadly.
“Eeyup… it smells like heaven…” he complimented. “Where’d you get something like that?”
Fluttershy’s face beamed and blushed simultaneously. She closed her eyes as his hoof gave her scalp a loving massage.
“I… went to Rarity’s today. Asked her if she had any perfume you might like,” she said. Her face turned red with embarrassment. “She told me this was one that helped with… getting stallions in the mood, so… I took it.”
Big Mac could practically feel her cringe against him from embarrassment, tightening her grip on him slightly. His lips parted into a wide smile, and then, with a small chuckle, he kissed her on her smoldering cheek.
“Well… it worked.” He ran his hoof down her back, stopping when he reached the joint of her wings. His hoof traced up and down the bony ridge, causing them to stand stiff at attention. His reply caused a tiny moan to escape her, and she pressed herself tightly against him, opening her wingspan more to allow him easier access. “I’m sorry that I made you feel like you had to do that, though…”
Fluttershy’s breathing became more erratic with every stroke of his hoof. His breath felt pleasantly warm against her ear. She giggled softly.
“D-Don’t worry about it… Rarity understands…” The blush never left her cheeks. “I forgive you. Though I am sorry for… you know, revealing more private details to her like that…”
“It don’t matter, Fluttershy,” he said, quick to wave her worries away. His hoof caressed the base of her wing a little harder, drawing another cute moan from her. He smiled ruefully. “I know she’s your friend. ‘sides, I probably deserve it, anyway…”
Trailing off, his hoof traced further down her back in an electrifying line until it rested on her cutie mark. Big Mac felt the muscle beneath tense up, and he massaged the spot like firm dough. Fluttershy’s head popped up from the bed, meeting him eye to eye. He grinned mischievously.
Not a word was said between them in that moment. Not a word needed to be said. Fluttershy’s wide eyes lidded over, and in a moment, a cheeky grin of her own spread across her face. His hoof still rubbing her flank, she leaned in until her mouth was right beside his ear.
“Lay back and relax, Big Mac,” she whispered. His ear twitched. “Because tonight, I’ll take care of everything.”
Even with the bedroom door closed, that night, Angel bunny found it hard to fall asleep.
…
Morning was not hasty in its arrival. The sun inched lazily over the horizon like a tired foal rolling out of bed on a school morning, its light glistening off of the dew on the grass like tiny crystal mirrors.
The rays of sunlight crept in through the window of the cottage, slicing the embracing pair of lovers in half. The sharp line gradually strayed upward until the heated beam came to rest on Fluttershy’s face.
Her eyelids flickered as the light flooded in. With a sigh, she opened them up, but not before blocking the incoming light with her foreleg. When she lifted her head, she realized with a blush that she was still lying on top of Big Mac, right where they had ended up from the night before. His forelegs held onto her around her withers and farther down her back, framing her drooping wings, and strands of her sweaty mane trailed down onto the mattress like little wavy ribbons.
But most of all, she saw his face. His eyes were closed and content, and his lips were curled upward into a tiny smile of satisfaction. She smiled back down, and turned her head to look at the clock.
Half past nine. With a happy sigh, she rested her head back onto his chest. Her smile grew wider.
So did his.
Author's Note
~~So, I would have rated this T, but the story failed moderation with that rating, so I had to change it to M. Just so you all know.~~ Rating changed to Teen. Now it will probably disappear into the abyss, never to be seen or heard from again. 
Anyways, I hope you all enjoyed! I won't say that this is my finest work, exactly, but I think parts of it turned out pretty well. Let me know what you think in the comments below, and feel free to offer constructive criticism if you want!
