Colgate and Berry Punch, Adventures in Ponyville

by Democritus of Abdera

Rating: teen
Tags: Cheerilee, Big Macintosh, Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Colgate, Berry Punch, Romance, Comedy, Derpy Hooves, Sex
Length: 29363

Minuette "Colgate" Romana moves to Ponyville after her business in Canterlot goes bust.

A story about Minuette "Colgate" Romana putting her life and livelihood back together in a new home in Ponyville with the help of friends she meets along the way, and some old ones she left behind in Canterlot. Colgate is a clock maker and carpenter (hourglass cutie mark, what was I supposed to do?) Berry Punch owns the local bar and has a daughter (Ruby Pinch) whom she adores. Toss in Cheerilee as Berry's frazzled but dedicated sister, Big Macintosh and everyone's favorite Mailmare Ditzy Doo, plus my freaky knowledge of Football, that is "Hoofball" and hopefully the resulting brew will come out tasting nice.

For those of us who can't get enough Berry Punch, Minuette recommends this blog: http://berrypunchreplies.tumblr.com/

(The story is going to be pretty straightforward, classic cast with as few OC ponies as possible and mostly situational humor and themes like forgiveness and reconciliation, working through problems and building relationships, and relying on your friends when you're in a jam. Probably some romantic themes later on, but nothing over the top or in bad taste. There will be some sad bits too of course, but that's not what the story is about, or what drives the plot. This is a story about beginning again in a new place, and all the hardships and triumphs, laughter and love therein.)

Published 2012-05-13 12:34:01 UTC
Last updated 2013-01-08 23:11:25 UTC

Prologue (Endings)

Endings

Current Cast:

Minuette "Colgate" Romana

Moondancer

It was the stillness, she thought, that hurt the most.

The shop had never been this silent, not in her entire life. The early morning light was filtering through the front window, as the dawn crested the buildings across the street. Minuette had to squint as she made her way around the counter and into the center of the shop, taking care not to trip over any of the boxes or rolled carpets. All around her, the oppressive silence closed in like a cloying fog.

The noises of the city outside had yet to begin, the staccato clop of taxi carriages, the voices of strolling passerby that would cast shadows on the surfaces within as they passed over the storefront. But for now, silence reigned in a place it had not held sway in nearly eighty years. That was how long ago her grandfather, Varnish Whitewood, having just arrived in this city, had wound up the massive grandfather clock that rested against the wall now, covered in protective cellophane and bubblewrap, for the first time. That clock had been the first of many, as Whitewood Carpentry and Clockwork had become one of the premier businesses on 47th and Maple Boulevard here in Canterlot.

Years later her father would inherit the family business, and at last she from him just under five years ago. Whitewood Co. had weathered the lumber crisis of 1966 that led to the rapid colonization of the Mild West, the credit crunch of '88, and had been delivered into Minuette's hooves a strong and profitable company with a broad clientele.

And in the space of five short years, I've managed to drive it into the ground. Minuette banged a hoof against her head, wanting to scream, if only to beat back the silence for a few moments.

It's not like it had happened without warning. After the credit crunch, a lot of mom and pop businesses had gone under, leaving only the biggest conglomerates still standing and profitable. Giants like Sunflower Sandwiches, Bridle Bath and Beyond, Cropco (Whipping prices till they behave!) and others had crushed all opposition as a more frugal consumer population demanded convenience and variety at low cost. Nopony wanted to wait weeks from someone like Minuette to hand craft them a clock or table, and pay hundreds of bits. They wanted to spend an hour looking at the selection, then buy the one on sale for 60 bits and some cents and have it shipped home that night.

Oh sure, some of the more posh ponies out there would pay top dollar for handmade products, but it was a niche market, and shrinking as even high society jumped on the mass consumerism bandwagon. This was a conversation Minuette had with herself many times, when she wanted to stave off her guilt, and it was all true.

Still feel like I let Da and Grandpa down though.

Minuette sat on her haunches and curled up in a ball, laying her head on a rolled up rug, some of the boxes around her were labeled "keep" but many, along with most of the furniture was labeled "auction." It made her sick to think how much of this was her father's personal work, she had tossed or put up for sale most of her own things to make room, except for a few essentials. She had fewer keepsakes of her grandfather, aside from the massive clock and a beautifully carved mahogany dinner table that she would be damned if she let anypony else ever lay a hoof on.

She had eaten every meal of her childhood on that thing, spilled juice and milk on it, even thrown up on it once or twice. It was gnarled and a little stained, and one of the legs had actually broken off and had to be glued back on (it was still a little wobbly) when she had attempted to change a bulb on the ceiling by standing on it. It was hers and she would take it and the grandfather clock with her when she left, no matter what.

The silence was stifling, ever since she could remember, this place had been filled with the soft hiss of sand trickling down the narrow throats of at least a dozen hourglasses, the low throbbing clank of the grandfather clock, the higher pitched tinkling chime of the wall clocks and watches, and the short musical notes as each hour arrived and went. The totality of quiet was oppressive. Still as death itself.

Minuette pulled out a small table clock from one of the "keep" boxes, her father's desk clock from his office upstairs, and wound it up. Its gentle ticking kept the melancholy a little more to the periphery of her thoughts, and she resumed packing what remained of the downstairs merchandise, knowing the moving company would be here in less than four hours. Minuette hoped that she had made the right choice.

In the uncharacteristic quiet it was easy to hear the door chime. Minuette looked up from where she had been rolling up another carpet to add to the stack, the deep blue of the levitation field casting shadows across the room. The light of her horn went out, and the trotted over to see who could be up this early, and ignoring her "closed" sign.

Illuminated by the backdrop of the sun, peering into the dark depths and in all likelihood seeing not much at all in the shadows of the interior was Moondancer, a cream colored earth pony with deep burgundy curls and a crimson crescent moon for a cutie mark. Even this early in the day, she had found time to style her mane, and pick out a nice shopping saddle with swirling patterns that sparkled in the morning light. She was pressing her muzzle against the glass and had her right forehoof hooding her eyes to better make out the interior. As Minuette came out of the shadows, Moondancer smiled and waved, pointing to the lock and raising an eyebrow. Minuette sighed and reached out; enveloping the lock with her telekinesis, and swung open the door.

Moondancer reached down and grabbed a basket Minuette had not noticed, carrying it inside in her teeth and setting it down on the table. Minuette closed and locked the door again, giving as pleasant a nod as she could manage, not really feeling up to visitors.

Moondancer kept the eyebrow raised. "Well Colgate, you look positively dreadful. I'm glad I decided to come by and check on you. You've become quite the recluse these last few weeks. Melodia and I have been worried sick about you ever since we got that letter saying you were closing up shop."

Minuette looked away, trying to control her features and keep impassive. She was always so damn terrible at keeping emotions off her face, she would not break down and start blubbering now, not after weeks of dealing with this. She didn't deserve to cry, it was her fault she was in this mess. She couldn't allow herself the luxury of falling to pieces till she had made this right, till she was safe and on her feet again.

Moondancer began pulling items from the basket, some kind of confectionery and a thermos, that when opened, drifted forth the sweet aroma of hot chocolate.

"Sit down." She said. It was not a request.

Minuette plopped down on the opposite side of the table. "Listen, I appreciate you coming over-"

"Shut up." Moondancer pushed the hot chocolate and cake toward Minuette, not relenting until she had taken a few sips and bites, grumbling inarticulately into her crumbs. Minuette had to admit, the cake was delicious, even dreary surroundings and black thoughts seemed to have little power over taste and smell. The warmth of the hot chocolate spread from her throat and chest out to her limbs, melting the ice of her resolve which she had so desperately strived to keep from dripping away. She would not cry. She would not.

"It is not your fault."

Minuette threw cup across the room, careening off the wall and spraying hot liquid onto a bubble wrap roll, the shatterproof plastic fell to the floor with a clang. Moondancer didn't even flinch.

"Yes it is! It's my fault! Just because Da or Grandpa aren't here to tell me off doesn't mean I get a free ride on punishment! I was responsible, the shop is mine, they gave it to me…trusted me to take care of it…and…and I failed."

Minuette buried her face in her hooves, squishing what was left of the cake. "I wasn't smart enough, I didn't see the way the wind was blowing, I could have reinvested, started carrying products from other companies, I could…I could've…" She was crying now, wracking sobs into the table, sharp and erratic, Moondancer sat up with a sigh that bespoke both empathy and profound exasperation, came around and patted a foreleg on Minuette's back, reaching down to grab the cup and refill it, placing it before her again.

"Dun, *sniff*Dun wanna 'nother." Minuette looked up and smiled weakly through the tears at her friend. "Good thinking with the plastic though."

Moondancer smiled, and gave Minuette a squeeze. "I plan ahead. And you need another. Several anothers."

Minuette nodded and took a sip, a few of the tears falling in, making ripples on its surface. "I'm gonna miss it here, miss you guys more'n anything. I'm…I'm so sorry. I screwed up." She looked at Moondancer, but she found no accusation, no condemnation in her face. Only concern, and not a little amount of barely concealed pain as well. Her green eyes had become bright and liquid, she was very well practiced at holding back tears though, they tended to ruin her makeup. It gave some ponies the impression that Moondancer was a bit shallow, as if a pony who behaved as ladylike as she was expected to break down at every little inconvenience. That wasn't Moondancer.

"Colgate, there was very little you could have done. You're a smart pony, the economy turned against you and you made the hard choice that needed to be made. You could have waivered, tried to hold on, keep afloat while you bled value till you had nothing left for the sake of some…forgive me but…misplaced notion of duty. Nopony would want you to go down with the ship just to prove how dedicated you are to the family business, in fact, by doing that you'd be proving the opposite."

Minuette sucked down the rest of the fresh cup, wiping her eyes. "How do you figure that?"

"You're a shrewd businessmare Minuette Romana, even if you do beat yourself up no end when things don't go right. Selling the store will net you a tremendous hunk of cash. More than enough to set up shop in Ponyville, the property values down there are one fifth of Canterlot's. And the giant outlet stores will overlook that place for years yet since its population is too low. You don't give yourself enough credit dear, and Melodia and I don't begrudge your choice, in fact, we both think it's the right one. Canterlot isn't the place for artists like you anymore. Maybe someday this city will connect with its heritage again, but for now, you have to survive, no matter what. It's a remarkably selfless thing you're doing here, abandoning your life, easy access to your friends, plus countless other things to keep your family's legacy alive. I think your father and grandfather would be proud. I certainly am."

Minuette grabbed Moondancer in a rib splitting hug, wheezing tears into her fur. "I promise I'll write, and visit, I swear I won't let this move ruin our friendship." She looked up at Moondancer, who was brushing away a tear herself.

"We know. But we can't be there for you all the time. So Melodia and I have a…request to make."

Minuette sat back, ears perked. "Anything!"

"When you get down there, we want you to find some friends, first thing. You shouldn't be alone at a time like this, when you allow yourself to be alone, this happens." Moondancer gestured around them, seeming to refer to the dimness, the stillness, and Minuette's accompanying depression. "You're not somepony who can afford to be alone. You've always been that way, without anypony to talk to or visit with, the light seems to go out in your eyes, and-" she said, gesturing to the smooshed cake "-you forget to do essential things like eating and drinking."

Minuette nodded. "It's a promise then, first thing, find some friends."

Author's note: I know there isn't much in the way of humor or romance in the first chapter, so the tags are a bit of a misnomer right now, but this will not be a short flash in the pan type story, so we're going to have some pacing. Feel free to make your displeasure known in the comments however, as well as any errors of grammar or style you may notice, they irk me as much as you, and I'd be happy to spruce this up so it all hurts our eyes a bit less. Thanks in advance!

Fair warning, I like my female protagonists the way I like my coffee, Strong! But with plenty of cream and sugar.

Chapter 1 (Arrival)

Arrival

New Cast:

Ditzy Doo "Derpy Hooves"

The train from Canterlot to Ponyville was relatively short, only a few hours. Minuette passed most of the time reading, or taking apart and tweaking her watch. One of the springs had a bad habit of catching a gear and locking the mechanism in place. They simply didn't make the gauge of spring this watch needed any more, and the previous one was so worn that when it finally broke, it snapped into several strands of warped brass that had rattled around within the watch when she shook it. Minuette was skilled, but making a square peg fit in a round hole was beyond even her. Perhaps there was someone in Ponyville who could machine components for her?

Minuette contemplated the bits of luggage she carried with her, an overnight bag with her essentials and duffel filled with some clothes in case she went out. The rest of her things were packed with what she had salvaged from the store in the boxcar behind her.

She sighed, putting down the book. "Daring Do and the Legend of the Jade Claw" was entertaining enough, but reading amongst the jostle of the train was making her a bit queasy. Still, something to check out from the library when she got there. Actually, Minuette had two reasons to go to the Ponyville library now, the second being she wanted to see if she could run into Twilight Sparkle.

It had been over two years since Twilight had left Canterlot to come here, though under much different circumstances. Since moving to Ponyville, Twilight had barely kept correspondence with Minuette, Moondancer or Melodia. Not that any of them would have called Twilight a friend before she had moved away. That pony had always seemed to gravitate toward solitude, rather than away from it.

Minuette gave a little shiver.

I might be a quiet pony, but spending all day locked up with a bunch of books and nopony else to talk to isn't my idea of a full life. I hope Twilight found friends that were able to break through her shell. We certainly never could.

Not that Twilight had ever been cold or cruel, she was just…distant.

Well at the very least it would be the courteous thing to drop in and say hello.

The train cleared a tunnel and burst forth onto the plains of the Equestrian countryside, the low rolling lands that surrounded the massive peak onto which Canterlot had been hewn. The train terminus in the foothills directed coming and going rail lines from every major city in Equestria, and Minuette could see rows and rows of engines and train cars being stored or repaired, grease and oil covered ponies and even the occasional Griffin could be seen crawling over them, Unicorns tearing off large chunks with their magic, Pegasi flitting about carrying messages and tools, Earth Ponies operating equipment and moving carts laden with coal or components. Minuette found herself reaching for her duffel and fishing out the sanitizing lotion. She did not much care for the rustic outdoors or the hustle and muck of heavy lifting. Sure a little lubricant or varnish on the hooves and mane was part and parcel of clockmaking and carpentry, but Minuette took great exception to activities that would expose her to dirt and related filth, especially germs. She liberally lathered her hooves' imaginary bacteria with alcohol scrub, and put the bottle away.

Minuette pulled out the catalogue of the property she had bought in Ponyville. A two story cottage with a lower floor living room suitable for greeting and entertaining guests, plus a kitchen and dining room that connected to the living room, upstairs bedroom and bath, guest bedroom and powder room, and a cellar underneath the bottom floor. It was the open first floor that had sold it for her. She would convert the living area into a storefront, making full use of the open space, and use the cellar for materials storage. It wasn't half as big as the shop in Canterlot, but if she was economical and didn't unpack much, the cellar would go far. She could probably even get away with converting the guest bedroom into an office or parlor of some kind where she could entertain company if the need arose. The powder room was probably going to become a closet filled with the overflow from the cellar, she thought morosely.

* * *

Minuette was feeling a bit better when she finally got the last of the boxes off the moving wagon and into the living room, gave the movers their tip and sank onto the blank hardwood floor, resting her head against a rolled up carpet, making the cellophane crinkle. One of the movers, a grey and blonde Pegasi with an eye that she appeared to only have marginal control over was happily waving goodbye through the front window. Minuette managed an awkward smile and wave from the floor, and the Pegasi grinned and drifted erratically off into the sky. After a minute or two of just laying there, hooves splayed out, rotating her shoulders to pop the aching joints from the four hour train ride, Minuette could feel the silence pressing in again.

Damn it.

She tore off the tape and bubble wrap, lifting out from its sheath the giant grandfather clock with her magic. She cast her eyes around, before settling on a place next to the staircase leading to the second floor, but still facing the living room. Reaching inside with her mind, knowing the shape and feel of the parts from memory, she started up its ancient gears, the silence was banished once again.

I need to make myself busy, and then I'll treat myself to a visit with Twilight this afternoon. If she isn't home, I could always explore the town.

Several hours later, as the late afternoon sun rolled over to the western horizon, Minuette realized two things. She had barely made a dent in unpacking, boxes and carpeting still strewn about everywhere and, as her stomach began to rumble with surprising volume, that she had forgotten to eat. Again. She chuckled even as the groaning made her clutch her belly.

"Gosh, did Moondancer call it or what? I'm lucky I haven't accidentally passed out from malnourishment at least once over the years."

A second grumble answered, and Minuette decided that the visit to Twilight could wait in favor of some food.

A quick look in the mirror told her that some freshening up would be in order before she left though. Moving boxes around, telekinesis or no, had left her covered with sweat and feeling slightly icky. Her normally straight blue and white mane was matted and tangled around her horn, and her tail could do with a brushing. She absently pulled a strand of packing tape from her flank with her teeth, where it had been adhered for who knew how long. Some of the fur that made up her hourglass cutie mark came away with it, painfully. Minuette massaged the spot with a forehoof, wincing.

She dropped the box she was currently carrying with a dull thud, that was the great thing about woodworking tools, most were cast iron or steel and one didn't have to be very gentle. Trotting upstairs and pausing to turn the shower on for the first time, she saw that there was a backlog of old stagnant water that had been fermenting in the pipes since this house had been put up for sale. Minuette gave a little strangled *Eep!* and turned the shower on full blast, resolving to let it run for ten minutes at least before she dared step inside.

No doubt the sinks are the same. Ugh.

She retreated to the skeleton of her new bedroom, currently consisting of an undressed bed with a pile of blankets atop it, surrounded by boxes. She fished out her clothing duffel from underneath the mound of fabric, rifling through the outfits and lamenting how most of them needed to be hung and pressed before they would be fit to wear again.

She was able to find a summer dress that was made from a fabric soft enough that it had not creased overmuch from being stuffed in a bag all day. It was a simple thing, with light yellow cotton that was essentially unadorned save for some wispy floral print stitching. From a distance barely noticeable, but up close the pattern was quite extensive, with ghostly leaves and flowers seeming to crawl up from the hem and all about its surface. Yellow had always complimented her coloration so well. Minuette wasn't even going to attempt to find the wide brimmed hat that went with this. Besides the sun was going down soon anyway, she scarcely needed it.

She left the dress draped over a box and fished out as much from her overnight bag as she would need. Shampoo, conditioner, toothbrush and paste, bar soap and scrub brush. Makeup had never been much of a thing with her, as a craftsmare she had a tendency to work with her hooves and horn a lot, things like polish and manicured nails just tended to chip or split. And frankly she wasn't very good at makeup application when she tried it herself either. Having a deep blue coat meant that the barrier between not enough and too much eye shadow and blush was crossed long before she noticed it. Sometimes she envied ponies like Moondancer with their bright pale coats that could take a color with the lightest application. For the same reason, her mane and tail style had always been pretty much what she woke up with that morning. If need be a quick brushing smoothed it out to near straight, with a few shocks of errant grey or blue curling up here and there. As long as it was clean, Minuette was happy.

She noticed with distaste a few spots of brown mold growing in the cracks of the tiles when she returned to the shower again. The water no longer smelled of old copper, and holding her bath items, she gently stepped into the rushing stream and shut the door behind her.

Minuette was almost embarrassed to admit that showering was one of her favorite parts of the day, not only did it soothe the accumulated aches and pains of the day, but the warm water had an almost spiritual restorative property, washing away the cold and the dark of worry and pain that little else seemed able to excise. It was an almost elemental pleasure, letting the water run over her body, down her hair and pool at her hooves, the steam filling her lungs. Ponies, indeed all life in the world, had begun ages ago in the sea, and this felt like a return to the beginning, the blank slate of being before time was counted and things like civilization and all its inherent sufferings had arisen to coat ponies every day in the accumulated filth of toil and regret and missed chances.

Where the in the bowels of Tartarus is all this damn melancholy coming from? I have got to find something to do with myself tonight. This isn't me at all.

Minuette shook her head to clear her mind, spraying water against the glass of the shower stall and causing her mane to slap wetly against her eyes and adhere to her face. Cursing and sputtering, she rinsed her eyes of shampoo. A few moments after some particularly colorful oaths, mostly involving anatomically difficult things to do with springs and gears, Minuette heard a distant noise from the bottom floor. She frantically shut off the shower to have a closer listen, and after a moment realized that it was a short chord from a sappy sounding song.

What in the…gods above is that what the doorbell sounds like?

In her panic, she slipped on the wet bathroom floor just as she swung open the door to the hall.

Why didn't I unpack the towels? Who gets in the shower without a towel?!

Dripping all over the hardwood floor as she barreled down the stairs, she managed to lose her footing again and slide with a low *Thud* against the front door. Groaning, the work of the shower at relaxing her muscles totally undone in less than twenty seconds, she fumbled with the key she would have to use until she got a feel for the interior of the lock in a week or two. On the other side of the door was the concerned face of the grey Pegasus mare from the moving company. Both eyes went wide at Minuette's appearance, even though one seemed to be focused on something happening somewhere to their left.

"Oh! Um. I-Hello again!" She smiled nervously and flapped her wings, then, when Minuette said nothing, awkwardly brandished a hoof. "The name's Ditzy Doo! Mail and delivery mare from the Absolutely Everything delivery and moving company."

Minuette could not help but smile at the absurdity of it all. After a moment of indecision, she stuck out a dripping hoof herself, the two met with a wet squish. "A pleasure, my name is Minuette Romana. What ah-what can I do for you Miss Doo?"

"Ooh, too formal for me, you can just call me Derpy, that's my nickname. But um, actually I was here because it looks like we misplaced some of your transport this morning. Not really sure how, but we sorted it out and I was sent to bring you this." She reached back and pulled a box out of a wagon that was parked a few yards back, trotting up and setting it at Minuette's hooves.

"We're awful sorry about the mix up, but we can assure you that this was the only package that was misplaced, I double checked the ledger myself!" Her head bobbed happily, and Minuette nodded thanks in turn, levitating the box into the living room to set it next to the sofa.

"Thank you very much uh…Derpy."

Suddenly, inspiration struck. "Hey…you wouldn't happen to know of any good places to get a bite and maybe meet some ponies here in town would you?"

Ditzy Doo's face lit. "Oh sure! I always love visiting Sugarcube Corner, it's a sweetshop near the center of town where they make the most delicious muffins you've ever seen! And tasted. Mostly tasted!" She tapped a hoof against her chin, her wandering eye rolling up, presumably to examine some clouds, or perhaps the setting sun. "Only problem is, they close pretty soon since it's not the weekend, that's when most of the parties and stuff tend to happen."

Minuette stared in fascination as the eye completed its roll and returned to near level with her face, where it stayed for the moment. "Actually Derpy, I was thinking more like dinner? Maybe drinks and dancing and stuff like that."

Ditzy Doo mumbled something about muffins being a good dinner, but then smiled again as a new thought arrived. "I got it! Café Celeste has great food, especially dinner, and there's an open bar after 6pm every day except Sunday. You should definitely try the eggplant and zucchini lasagna, it's got real goat cheese and everything." She appeared to practically salivate just thinking about it. "I'd go myself if I didn't have tons of paperwork tonight. But you should totally try it!"

Well that answers my next question, she's too busy to come with me. All right, but that open bar sounds promising, so long as I don't overdo it. Stick to meeting and greeting, that's the ticket.

"Thanks for the info, I think I will. Once I get ah-myself sorted out." Minuette was actually starting to shiver as the evening air evaporated the warmth from her body.

"Yeah, I hope your plumbing isn't busted or something, that house isn't exactly new." Ditzy Doo looked with concern as she hitched herself back up.

"No no, it's all right, just a temperamental shower is all. Thank you again for coming by so late!" Minuette yelled as Ditzy Doo took off with the wagon in tow, listing wildly to the right and left before leveling out.

"No problem at all!" And she was gone.

Going back inside, Minuette quickly pulled a pair of scissors off the table, hoping that the contents of the errant box had not been fragile if they had been exposed to the kind of erratic flying she had just seen, the thought of glassware or perhaps plates bouncing around in the back of Ditzy's wagon sent shivers up her spine that had nothing to do with cold.

She cut the tape free and threw open the box, peering inside.

Towels.

Chapter 2 (Impressions)

Impressions

New Cast:

Ruby Pinch

Berry Punch

Horte Cuisine

Desmond

I probably should have asked Ditzy Doo for directions.

Minuette was standing in the shadow of Town Hall, which was the most easily identifiable landmark in town. It was the tallest building in Ponyville by far, and not too distant from Minuette’s house. She checked her watch, working correctly for now, and synched to its much larger counterpart sitting atop the balcony where government officials presumably gave public addresses and speeches. Sugarcube Corner was easy enough to locate from here, to her west only about 200 meters away. It resembled a gingerbread house in macroscale, with dark brown shingles and faux icing gutters. It even had what appeared to be a cupcake tower jutting from the center of the roof, complete with birthday candle lightpoles. She would definitely find her way over there in the next couple days.

Careful, remember finals week at university, forgetting meals and then gorging on ice cream in the middle of the night to make up for it does not count as sustenance, it counts as courting death by rocky road.

Well, if I had to go, that would be in my top three.

She shook her head, and once again cursed the lack of signage in this town. That was the infernal thing about these country villages, everypony already knew everypony else and had for the last ten generations. Oh the streets themselves had names yes, but Canterlot also had things like public transportation, taxi carriages and advertisements about where to find the next Soup Corral or whatever.

I did notice a hardware store on the way here though, it even had what looked like a smithy in the back for manual repairs, might be just what I nee-

Minuette made a small choking noise as something shuffled out from underneath the hedge surrounding the main courtyard in front of Town Hall. In the dimness it was hard to make out immediately, but Minuette saw that whatever it was it was roughly the size of a dog, but with entirely too many legs. Four bright red embers burned at the center of the chittering mass that Minuette realized now was a truly enormous spider, with legs as black as the space between stars and a body covered in fur the color of the darkest rainclouds.

“Ye…Ye… EEEEEEE!!!” Minuette brandished her purse in her teeth, taking a fighting stance as the horror crawled in her direction, gibbering sounds trickling from its clacking mandibles.

It was crawling closer, bale eyes locked upon her, staring into the depths of her soul. Minuette backed away until her flank smacked into a fence, preventing further retreat. The beast closed in, its forelegs brandished, as if any moment it would try to lunge onto her face.

Could this be a beast wandered in from the Everfree forest?! I read somewhere that Ponyville bordered a remnant of the roiling wildlands, last fragment of the world before ponykind had tamed the land we now call Equestria.

Would it simply kill her and eat her right here? Maybe she should run? The fence was high but if she jumped…or she might just pin herself halfway over it, easy prey for whatever poisonous sting it was sure to have. Perhaps it would lose interest if it took a swift buck to the face?

How in the name of Celestia did this thing get to the center of town?! Is everypony here mad?! Is…is that a ribbon tied around its abdomen? What?!

“Hey lady!”

Minuette wheeled to see a small unicorn filly sprinting toward her. The child had a warm pink coat that reminded Minuette of carnations in the springtime with a slightly darker mane of similar hue. The spider turned as well, and emitted a high pitched bleat, before changing direction and skittering off toward the little unicorn at speed.

“Heaven’s wrath child! Run! Get help! I’ll try to keep it busy!” Minuette ignored the squeal of fear twisting in her stomach and threw herself between the child and the spider, striking it hard across the face with her purse and knocking it on its back. It let out a hissing screech and thrashed wildly, spindly legs seeking purchase to right itself.

The Unicorn filly screamed and leapt over Minuette. “Desmond! Oh nooo!”

Minuette stared as the child engulfed the spider in the magic of her horn and lifted it into the air-

Why the hell didn’t I think of that?!

-before gently placing it upright where it had stood before. The spider seemed to shrink away from Minuette, who was lying in the dirt, mouth agape.

“Wh…Wh…what?!”

The unicorn filly turned to Minuette, tears streaming down her face. “You meanie! You hit Desmond, you’re lucky he didn’t hurt himself, look how scared he is!”

“…What.”

The spider did appear to be doing something akin to cowering now, crawling behind the small unicorn and clinging to her foreleg, making agitated bubbling noises. There was indeed a bow tied about its abdomen in the same color as the filly’s coat, that spring carnation pink.

No…

“Aren’t you gonna apologize? Just ‘cause you’re big and he’s small doesn’t mean you get to do whatever you want! Smacking animals in the face when they try to say hi!” She was starting to hyperventilate.

Minuette slowly stood, trying to find words. “I…”

“I came running over to thank you for finding him, he’s been missing all afternoon, but then you freaked out and hit him. I…wait a minute.” The Unicorn filly took a step back to examine Minuette more critically. “Who are you? I’ve never seen you before.” Her adorable attempt at a snarl was replaced by a quizzical stare.

Grateful for a statement her partially melted brain could easily answer, Minuette spoke:

“My name is Minuette Romana, I just moved to Ponyville today, and already your town is threatening to snap in half what remains of my emotional health and well being.”

It was only now, coming off the adrenaline that Minuette began to feel the post high release, like a puppet with strings cut, she suddenly felt very wobbly on her feet.

This town is insane.

“Little girl-” Minuette began.

“My name is Ruby Pinch.”

“Ruby Pinch, I-”

“And his name is Desmond.” Ruby said, pouting.

“Hello Desmond-I mean…Argh!” Minuette smacked a hoof on her head.

Ruby sat on her haunches, Desmond crawling onto her back to perch atop her head, clinging to her mane. “Lady, are you ok?”

Minuette slumped to the ground, covering her head in her hooves. “I just, I just want to find Café Celeste, and have some lasagna! Without falling down my staircase, and without being attacked on the way by monsters from the Everfree Forest! Then finding out that, silly me, fillies in this town have forest monsters for pets all the time!”

Ruby perked up. “Oh, Desmond’s not from the Everfree forest, he’s from Ponyville, Rarity made him for last year’s Nightmare Night celebration.”

Minuette had descended into confusion again. “What?”

“He used to be a toy for the web throwing game at the Nightmare Night carnival.”

Confusion...going...deeper.

“But then Princess Luna hit him with some magic spell, and he came alive! It was super scary, and way cool!” Ruby reached up and patted Desmond as he sat on her head. The spider closed its eyes and rubbed against her hoof, emanating a low trilling sound.

Deeper still.

“Before Princess Luna left, she turned the others back into toys, but I begged her to let me keep Desmond, and she said yes!”

My confusion is without fathom.

Fortunately, Ruby was not done. “Hey, I can understand why Desmond bothered you, he is pretty scary, and awesome, but don’t worry he’s totally friendly and harmless. And even grownups like you can be scaredy pants sometimes, I won’t tell anyone.” Ruby winked and gave a big smile.

“Hbwuh?! But I-Ooh!” Minuette got to her hooves and brushed herself off as best she could, her dress was halfway to ruined. She should probably just go home, go home and find something to smack her head against for the next hour or two. Then perhaps she would have the requisite amount of saddle-on-head insanity to take this town with a straight face. Instead she breathed deep, and counted to twenty in her head while she popped out the alcohol scrub and wiped her hooves. Thoroughly. Twice.

Ruby cocked her head and bemusedly watched this little display, as Desmond crawled around to hang from the side of her flank and bat at her tail as it swished by. “You know, if you’re looking for Café Celeste I can take you. My mommy works there most days.”

Minuette sighed as her stomach grumbled once again, now that the excitement was over, it was not going to be denied. “That would be very nice, thank you Ruby.”

Then belatedly as they started to move down the road going south from town hall, “And I’m sorry I hit Desmond.”

Ruby smiled. “It’s ok, you didn’t know any better. Besides, he looks fine. And he was being bad, getting out of the apartment like that without me.”

***

Ruby had bounded off with Desmond swinging from her mane as they approached the restaurant. Minuette returned her parting wave, and tried again to rub out the dirt stains on her dress. She had a brush in her purse, so her hair had been returned to its nondescript status quo of serviceably straight, but there were several smudges, especially around the hem, that made it look like she had taken a roll in a ditch.

No helping it, and I’m not about to walk around with this thing draped over my back like I’ve spilled wine on it or something.

She put on her best smile of greeting and approached, taking in her surroundings. The café itself was two stories, and built from light timber with heavy thatched roof like most buildings in Ponyville. This time with sea green cross beams and floral highlights. Hay bales for sitting were placed around circular tables out in an open front courtyard, the tables were small, and she could see parasols stacked against a wall for when the sun beat down during the day. It being a Tuesday night, the restaurant did not appear to be seeing much traffic, lights were on, and the sound of music drifted from inside, but no ponies were sitting outside.

Immediately within, the atmosphere was much transformed, Minuette could see heavy wooden tables and booths with cushions to her right, and a bar with drink taps and numerous colored bottles built into the wall to the left. To the far rear, the doors to the kitchen were barely visible, and a sign hung above them saying, “restrooms/stairs.” Electric lights on the ceiling provided a dim haze of illumination for the entire room, and was augmented by a smattering of candles at every table. The right side of the room also featured a massive fireplace, currently dark since the weather was warm and nopony wanted to be as baked as their dinner. Still, this place must get downright cozy in winter time.

Several patrons were sitting at the tables, Minuette could see a pearl white Unicorn with liquid blue eyes and a deep lavender mane whose strands seemed to flow like water when she brushed them idly with her forehoof. Minuette felt her breath catch in her throat, she had always thought Moondancer was queen of the blush pad and graphite pen, but this was incredible. Whoever she was, she was discussing something animatedly with a bright pink Earth Pony sitting across from her in their corner booth. Every now and then she would cover her face to stifle a giggle as her pink counterpart gesticulated wildly in frantic pantomime, no doubt recounting some hilarious tale involving…balloons…a cart, no, a bicycle? With propellers? And somepony getting soaked? The pink pony had picked up her glass of water and splashed her own face with it, sticking both arms up in final triumph as she completed her story. It was too much for her Unicorn friend, who doubled over cackling and clutching her sides, luxurious locks bouncing as tears of mirth made her mascara run.

“Madame? Are you waiting to be seated?” The waiter had materialized at her side, serving tray stowed in a rack on his back, eyebrow cocked and very pointedly ignoring the spectacle happening at the other end of the room.

Minuette snapped free from her reverie. “Oh! I…Yes. That is, um I think I’ll just take a seat at the bar if that’s all right?”

The waiter nodded, somehow managing to be both haughty and deferential at the same time. “But of course Madame, whenever you please.”

The bar was empty except for a single Earth Pony with a plum colored coat and Mulberry mane that scrunched in big floppy curls. Her cutie mark was a bunch of grapes and a strawberry. She was humming something softly to herself and smiling at a plaque on the wall behind the bar. Remembering her promise to Moondancer, but not quite trusting herself to have the gumption to speak to the supermodel and maniac in the corner booth, Minuette trotted up and slid onto the stool next to her and began to flip through the menu.

It was really more of a delaying tactic than anything, Minuette knew she was getting the lasagna but she wanted to see if the other pony would say something first. Minuette had learned ways over the years to overcome or avoid the difficulty she had with introductions, and making the other pony feel like they had to be the one to break the silence was a tried and true method. Being distracted fishing for nothing in her purse was also a good one, if more situational.

It worked like a charm. The other pony turned and smiled as Minuette pretended to read prices. “Hey there, name's Berry Punch.” She brandished a hoof.

Minuette happily took it, dropping the menu, its purpose served. “Minuette Romana, a pleasure.”

Berry put a hoof to her chin that for a moment reminded Minuette of Ditzy Doo. “That’s a Canterlot accent if I ever heard one. Are you visiting family here in Ponyville?”

Minuette gave a surprised smile. “You’re right! About the Canterlot bit anyway, as to the second half, actually no, I just moved here. There was a property for sale on Barley Terrace near Town Hall.”

Berry’s eyes lit in recognition. “Oh! Well let me be the first to welcome you to Ponyville then. I know it must seem a little rustic to you, but we do pretty well for ourselves. You know, I actually went to Canterlot University for a time.”

Minuette waved the waiter over, he appeared to be doubling as the bartender as well. “You don’t say? What year?”

Berry seemed to cast back for a moment. “1994 if memory serves, that was when I was accepted.”

“Incredible! I enrolled in ’97! Do you think we might have shared any classes? What was your Major?” Minuette was shocked that she might find somepony with so much in common with her. On her first try no less! It made her want to squee!

“Oh…no I was out and back here by the end of 1996.” Berry seemed to lose some of her smile, instead turning to the waiter. “Horte, this gal’s bill is on me tonight, it’s her first night in town and I want her to get the traditional Ponyville welcome. Got it?”

“I couldn’t let you do that Berry! We just met!” Minuette didn’t know whether to panic or be grateful at being shown special treatment from the word go.

“Won’t take no for an answer, Horte, just add everything to my tab, like usual.” The waiter sniffed derisively at that statement, and turned to Minuette. “What will the lady be having then?”

Minuette whipped out the menu again, scanning for the cheapest thing she could find.

But Berry smacked the menu down on the table with a forehoof. “I saw your eyes lingering over the lasagna, and you were right to, it’s the best dish in the house.” She turned toward Horte. “She’ll have one of those, and I’ll have my usual.”

Minuette blushed deeply, looking down.

“Hey c’mon, I’m getting something out of this too; after you’re done you get to be my drinking buddy for the evening.” Berry winked and accepted what appeared to be a glass of hard apple cider from Horte’s tray as he passed.

“Hope you don’t mind if I get a head start.” With that, she knocked back the drink in six quick gulps, licking the lingering foam from her lips with a sigh of contentment.

Minuette could only smile and push a hoof absently across the countertop.

Well Moondancer, looks like I made a friend, though Berry is definitely…not what I was expecting.

Berry accepted a second cider, then ran an eye over Minuette’s body.

“Hey…what the hell happened to your dress?”

Authors note: Big thank you to everyone who has read and given this a like so far, you guys are so supportive I finished this one a little early, so I put it up tonight. Hope you like it.

Chapter 3 (Memory)

Memory

Wait…Colgate? Like…like the-?

“Yeah, yeah. Like the toothpaste.”

*Snerk* “Thass the mos’ random nickname I’ve ever heard.”

“Hey it’s not like I picked it! When Melodia, Moondancer and I went out for brunch soon after we had first met, I had to duck out afterward to brush my teeth. Melodia saw me when she went to use the bathroom as well, and thought it was hilaaaarious.”

“It couldn’t *hic* wait’ll you got home? Usin’ a public baffroom to brush yer teef is kinda…”

“No it couldn’t wait. I honestly don’t know how everypony else can stand it, walking around with gunk in their mouth, who made the rule saying you had to brush your teeth right before bed?! What a stupid time to brush your teeth, hours after you eat, letting the germs ferment in your mouth all evening. It makes no sense!” Minuette pounded the countertop with her beer, spraying foam over her forelegs.

“Ick.” She popped out the alcohol scrub and wiped her hooves off in the towel that Horte had been bringing over to clean up Berry’s and her own frequent spills, before simply leaving it there with an exasperated sigh, knowing he was fighting an uphill battle.

To Minuette’s right, Berry was grinning into her 3rd Sonic Rainboom (she had previously consumed a total of 7 Sweet Apple Acres Hard Apple Ciders)

“Well, it suits ya, I ain’t never seen nopony quite so uptigh’ abo germs. Walkin’ down tha street here’n Ponyville muss make ya wanna retch.” *hic*

Minuette turned, swaying slightly, horrified she might have given offense. “Not at all Berry, not at all. Ponyville has its own kind of cleanliness about it. Sure it might be a little bit dusty-” Minuette glanced down and her rumpled and smudged dress “-but, this place is…it’s clean in ways Canterlot never will be.”

“Like?” Berry arched an eyebrow and drank the red layer of her Rainboom, making a face like someone had kicked her in the tonsils.

“The air here is clean, I’ve lived in Canterlot all my life, I didn’t know what it was like to have air so clean I could smell flowers across the street, or baked goods from so far away. While I was walking past Town Hall, I got a whiff of something…scintillating from Sugarcube Corner, and I wasn’t even going in that direction.” Minuette sighed at the memory. “This place still has charm; it’s still got the feeling of a community, instead of just a bunch of ponies packed into giant buildings. You lose something I think, when you live in a place where every square meter is built up, where the noises never stop.” She took another sip of beer.

“Don’t get me wrong, I hate silence, but the quiet here isn’t of loneliness or isolation, it’s just…peaceful. You’d be amazed how lonely you can feel when you’re surrounded by ponies all day, people you never speak to, and never remember you.”

Minuette turned to the lavender Earth Pony, who seemed lost in thought. “You didn’t feel any of that? When you were at Canterlot University all those years ago? You must have felt as much a fish out of water then as I do now.”

Berry looked away, then slammed back another swig of her drink, taking the orange layer this time. “Yeh. It don’t feel s’bad if ya got somepony wiff ya, tho. Somepony special. Like yew and yer friends Moonpie and Melon.”

“Moondancer and Melodia”

“S’what I said.” Berry looked at Minuette with concern. “Yew shud prolly stop drinkin’ if yer startin’ to havin’ trouble hearin’ fings.”

Minuette stifled a giggle. “You’re right Berry. What was I thinking, trying to keep up with you?” She eyed her own modest pile of empty glasses: Three ciders, two local beers (counting her current one) and an Appletini that had been utterly delicious (she would have ordered a second, but not on Berry’s nickel).

Minuette also had the benefit of a full stomach of lasagna to ballast out the alcohol, she didn’t even know if Berry had any food before this.

They were the last patrons in the bar, Minuette realized, the stunning Unicorn and her friend from earlier were gone. All the candles at the various tables had been doused, leaving only the dull glow of the overhead lights. The bar area itself was shrouded in shadow.

Minuette glanced at her watch and swore.

“S’matter?” Berry listed dangerously in her seat, and Minuette reached out with a panicked hoof to stabilize her. “Thanks.”

“Um, nothing’s the matter; my watch just broke again is all. Been trying for weeks to find a spring for it, making do with one that’s too big.”

The watch had indeed broken, it had come to a stop at 11:35 and some seconds, Celestia only knew how long ago that was.

They had been here much longer than Minuette had thought. There was no other clock in the room for her to check the current time. Why had Horte not kicked them out yet?

Do these ponies have no concept of time? How the hell do they keep appointments when the only clock I’ve seen that isn’t mine was stuck to Town Hall?

Minuette looked out the front door, it was stupid to look, it wasn’t like anything outside could tell her the time, and they were much too far from Town Hall. The night outside was deeper and darker than any she could remember, only an isolated smattering of magical streetlamps pierced the darkness, nothing at all like Canterlot where the night was a perpetual, twinkling twilight. Celestia’s home city refused to give the shadows purchase, even drowning out the light of the stars.

Berry was speaking again. “Thumbtack’ll hook ya up. He…uh…he ownsa hardware store. Anyfing he don’t have he’kn make fer ya custom. Fixed m’wagon gud a few weeks back…r’was that lass month?” Berry nodded several times, as if for emphasis, then sucked down the yellow layer of her Rainboom, shaking her head violently and stifling a cough.

She continued when the coughing subsided. “Colgate…hell I never’n really hada nickname. I wuz always jus Berry Punch.”

Berry looked at Minuette with deep seriousness. “Ya do kinda look like Toofpaste. Wiff tha coat an tha white hair.”

“Thanks Berry.” Minuette facehoofed.

“Jus sayin. S’ a good nickname. Fits ya.”

Minuette sighed, and took another swig of beer. “Feel free to use it then, I always did find Minuette a little…stuffy as first names go.”

“Dun worry bout bein’ stuffy, we’n got tha stuffiest pony in alla Equestria alredy.” *hic* “Tha Unicorn in th’ corner earlier? Name’s Rarity, and she’s gota stick up’er ass so big-”

“Berry!”

“Wha? S’the truf. She hates dirt an hard work like it wuz made out’a Nightmare Moon’s nightmare turds.”

“Berry Punch, you are quite the foul mouth when you’ve had too much to drink.” Minuette giggled into her hoof while Berry brooded at the far wall.

“I jus start sayin’ wha I’m always thinkin’ when I get sauced.” Berry looked over at Minuette, who was still smiling. “How come yer still all fine an lil miss high society?”

Minuette downed the last of her beer. “Because I’m enjoying my alcohol, not trying to drink myself into a stupor. Doesn’t mean I’m not feeling it, but the last thing to go with me is my mouth.”

Berry raised an eyebrow again. “Yeh? Whass th’ first fing?”

Minuette blushed, looking away. “Um. I’d rather not talk about it. Let’s just say alcohol is a gateway to poor choices for me.”

Berry nodded, resting her chin on the countertop. “Meh too.” Then, looking morosely at what remained of her drink. “I shud prolly stop now yeh?”

Minuette put a sympathetic hoof on Berry’s shoulder. “Probably.”

The mulberry Earth Pony pushed the drink away with a snort of disgust.

Minuette slid out of the stool and onto her hooves without slipping or falling over, though the room did wobble slightly as she walked. “I have got to use the restroom Berry, all those liquids had to go somewhere.”

Berry waved a hoof from the table. “Sure fing, m’ not goin anywhere.”

Once in the bathroom, Minuette rather self consciously pulled out her toothbrush and paste. The lasagna had been wonderful, but now it was time to say goodbye to the strand of spinach that had been lodged between her molars for the entire evening.

Berry’s a very nice pony, I mean Celestia’s tits she must have spent near a hundred bits on dinner and drinks for the both of us, and we had barely met.

Minuette contemplated her reflection in the mirror as she brushed.

But, she seems to have a bit of a drinking problem. I don’t know, maybe she doesn’t behave like this very often. It didn’t take much prodding to get her to stop after all. When we go out to eat in the future, maybe I should put my hoof down sooner. Before she starts hitting the Rainbooms.

Minuette made a face, not knowing how a pony could drink something so vile, let alone three. The Sonic Rainboom was a fraternity dare drink from her college days, drunken frat stallions and hoofball players choking them down till one of them puked all over themselves. Nopony drank them for their taste.

She put her things back in her purse and opened the door to the restaurant, walking into pitch darkness.

What? Did the power fail?

“B-Berry? What happened? Are you ok?”

Her horn illuminated the interior in a ghostly blue light. There was Berry Punch, sitting where she had been before, head slumped against the countertop. She did not stir at the sound of Minuette’s voice. As she approached, she could hear Berry’s breathing, slow and deep.

She fell asleep? But…oh hell. How is she supposed to get home like this?

It was at that moment that Minuette realized she did not know exactly where Berry lived in town.

She reached out and gently shook the sleeping pony. “Berry wake up, I need to get you home. Berry?” Even vigorous shaking could not rouse her. Minuette thought for a moment, and then smacked a hoof across Berry’s face. Nothing.

She’s unconscious. Great.

The doors to the kitchen were locked, But she did find out why the lights went out, a wall timer that goverened the overheads had finally wound down to zero. It looked like the dial could be set for hours, probably the entire working day. Minuette gave it a crank to around the five minute mark, and the lights flicked back on.

Might be Horte’s passive aggressive way of telling any lingering patrons to shove off. Though that hardly makes sense, I could very easily burglarize this place right now and nopony would be the wiser. Where the hell is he?

The stairs going to the second floor appeared to lead to living spaces, Minuette halted at the top of them, finding another locked door. She stopped herself before she reached out with her telekinesis to pick the door.

I’m in someone’s house now, crawling around like a cat burglar. I need to stop before I create an incident. That bastard Horte must have assumed I’d take her home. Also, I’m more than a little drunk, which means I should be checking every decision I make. This is a bad one.

She stumbled back down the stairs and over to Berry, who burped slightly as she approached.

I…suppose I could take her back to my place. Set her up in the bed. Put a bucket down or something for when she woke up.

This seemed like a better plan, one that didn’t break any laws or make a scene on her first night in this city.

It’s not like I could just leave her here, not after buying me dinner, drinks and being good company to boot.

Yes, her brain said sarcastically, this isn’t like kidnapping at all. If you were a stallion, this would be beyond creepy.

Shut up. I’ll…sleep on the sofa.

Minuette reached out with her magic, slowly engulfing Berry in a halo of sparkling blue energy. Her head lolled to the side as she was lifted into the air and in front of Minuette, legs dangling a foot above the ground.

There, she’s no heavier than grandfather’s old clock. This’ll be a snap.

***

Ok, a “snap” might have been being flippant.

Minuette strained under the mental stress of keeping the levitation field stable as the pair passed Town Hall. Somewhere around Sugarcube Corner, Berry had begun to snore, her legs twitching slightly as she floated along.

The clock on the balcony read 3:34AM and Minuette cursed again. Sweat was beading down her face and beginning to soak into her armpits and mane, droplets pooling and falling from her chin.

Only a few more blocks.

She saw the fence she had been pinned against when she had met Ruby Pinch and Desmond. In her terror, she had pressed down one of the fence posts till it had almost popped free of its brethren.

Above her, Berry stirred and stuck out her hooves as if grasping for something, muttering unintelligibly to herself.

Minuette had to admit it was pretty funny, all things considered. Berry probably wasn’t going to wake up till tomorrow-correction, this afternoon.

And I probably won’t either, if this keeps up much longer.

She redoubled her concentration as she felt her hold over Berry’s body slacken and the field begin to flicker dangerously. Minuette picked up speed, trotting onto her property and pulling her purse out with her teeth. Then swearing violently again for what must have been the tenth time this evening.

I left the key inside.

Minuette hadn’t needed to use a key to get into her home or store since she was a small child, she had not carried one in years. She knew exactly where it was, sitting on the table next to the sofa where she had laid it after speaking with Ditzy yesterday afternoon. Unable to keep the spell on any longer, Minuette let Berry slide down onto the stone steps in front of her house, before collapsing herself, wheezing from the exertion. After a few moments Berry rolled into a fetal ball and reached out to grab Minuette’s leg.

“Mmmm…Gingerbread.”

Minuette couldn’t help but laugh as Berry clung to her. At least she’s having a good dream.

She pulled her leg free and reached out again with her magic, fumbling with the tumblers of the door lock, feeling out the unfamiliar components and pushing them into place one by one. It took several minutes longer than she hoped, the alcohol buzz not really being conducive to precision telekinesis.

At last the door swung open, and Minuette dragged them both in by hoof, her magic utterly spent. Hauling Berry up the stairs was…fun, but at last they burst into Minuette’s bedroom on the second floor, still bare of furnishings but with an intact bed. She shoved the blanket pile and duffel bag to the floor, and hefted Berry onto the mattress.

Going back downstairs, Minuette could not find a bucket in the things she had unpacked, and decided after a resigned moment that a cookpot could serve just as well.

A cookpot that will be getting a thorough cleaning afterward.

With it placed next to Berry’s head, Minuette was confident it would intercept any early morning “accidents.” As she laid it down, Berry seemed to sense her presence, pawing the air with a hoof and muttering again.

“Berry? Are you awake? Did you need something?” She reached out and took Berry’s hoof.

“Nnn…Imgood Ginny, juss come ta bed hon.”

Minuette froze, color rising in her cheeks. “Um. No, Berry it’s me, Minuette. Colgate? Remember?” She pulled her hoof free, bringing it to her chest. “We just had dinner together?”

“Dun…dun go Ginny, Ineed ya. Pinchy needs ya. Please…”

Minuette was beginning to feel very uncomfortable. “I’m sorry Berry, Ginny isn’t here, it’s just me.”

“Nnnooo…”

Minuette got up and pulled some of the blankets over Berry’s curled form, tucking her in as best she could. Berry tried to speak again a few times as Minuette went around the room, closing windows so the coming dawn wouldn’t wake her, but nothing understandable. When Minuette returned to slide a rolled up blanket under Berry’s head in lieu of a pillow, she saw the mulberry Earth Pony was crying silently into the sheets.

Minuette reached out and gave Berry a comforting pat.

“I’m sorry I couldn’t be the one you wanted.”

She turned and closed the door, heading downstairs to the sofa. The sofa that still had its cushions packed somewhere in the cellar. As a naked wooden frame, it would make a poor bed.

Looking around, her eyes fell on an open box by the wall.

Screw it, that’s what towels are for.

Minuette threw off her dress, letting it crumple in a heap on the floor near the front door and unceremoniously dumped the contents of the box on the sofa, spreading out the bright floral bath towels as best she could into a makeshift matting. She selected a huge white beach towel studded with lime green flowers to use as covers, and crawled into the mound, exhausted.

Chapter 4 (Dreams)

Dreams

Minuette was sitting in the upstairs office. Light from the spring morning outside bathed the room in a crisp golden glow. In the air, motes of dust floated, wispy arcs roiling softly though the shafts of light as they pierced the blinds. She had a book in her hooves.

“Cuuuurrrssseeee Yooouuuuu Daring Dooooo!! Screamed Ahuitzotl as the intrepid Pegasus adventurer smashed the jade claw into a thousand pieces, glittering fragments raining down the altar’s face. Ahuitzotl fell to his knees, clutching at the broken shards in futile denial of his defeat, face contorted in anguish. Daring could only marvel how in such a state, even knowing how evil he was; seeing him mewling and broken before her like this was almost pitiable. Almost. She turned and grabbed the rope dangling from the temple tower and with a mighty heave, flung herself into the midnight air, pausing only to give her old nemesis a farewell tip of the hat as she flew away to the other side of the volcano caldera, and relative safety.”

Before Minuette a carnation pink Unicorn filly gasped in shock, squeezing an enormous spider in her forelegs so tightly it emitted a low gurgling noise.

“But…but that claw was her mentor’s prized piece! Dr. Appaloosa Jones made his career with that discovery! She didn’t have to smash it! Why not take it back? Ahuitzotl stole it first after all!”

Minuette put the book on her leg and smiled. “That’s the kind of thinking that let Ahuitzotl get his evil paws on it in the first place. Daring didn’t want to, she knew how much it meant to Dr. Jones, but the claw was just too dangerous, I mean, it was the last piece of the puzzle to free Discord, and the eruption was happening any minute.”

Ruby Pinch mumbled something about Daring being able to use the Chimera Idol from book five to turn Discord into stone whenever she wanted to.

Minuette snickered. “Now don’t read too much into this Ruby. It’s just a story; you can’t expect the author to think of every little thing. Especially with a series as long running as this one.”

From below them a voice drifted up the stairs. “Colgate! Pinchy! Breakfast!”

Ruby leaped to her hooves and bolted from the office. “Coming Mom! C’mon Desmond, or I’ll eat your pancakes too!”

The spider bleated as it scurried after her, crawling down the wall directly rather than opting for the stairs at all.

Minuette followed at a much more sedate pace. Beyond the office was the hallway that opened to the storefront on the ground floor, here too the air was colored a brilliant gold as rays of Celestia’s dawn played across the sparkling brass and copper faces of the clocks and hourglasses that lined the shelves and windows. In the back of the first floor was the sawdust filled workstation Minuette used for carpentry projects. Her current one was a filly sized bed, with an attachment on the side wherein a creature about the size of a small dog might nestle itself, had it the unusual ability to climb sheer surfaces.

The smell of cooking food wafted past Minuette’s nostrils, accompanied by laughter and the clink of china being set up.

She breathed deep, drinking in the feeling as she looked over her home and her store, and out the window to the waking town beyond.

Yes. This is good. This is right.

Minuette felt a presence behind her. She turned to see Berry Punch, cup of coffee in hoof.

“Here you go.” She said, placing the mug on a corner table.

“Thanks.” Minuette enveloped the mug in her magic, and brought it to her lips, then snorted. “You put a little something in this didn’t you?”

Berry laughed, brandishing her own cup. “And a lot of something in mine!”

Minuette sighed, rubbing her eyes. “You never change, Berry.”

Berry slid up alongside her, rubbing her muzzle in Minuette’s coat. “Yup. I’m just broke in ways you’ll never be able to fix.”

The pair stared out, watching the morning pass, the sound of pancakes being violently inhaled behind them the only damper on what was shaping up to be a calm, beautiful day.

Minuette felt Berry stiffen next to her, then put her mug down. She turned to look at Minuette, all mirth draining from her eyes. “And yet you’re still here. With me. Why?”

Minuette stared for a moment, then reached out to touch Berry’s cheek; she leaned into Minuette’s hoof as she ran it through the loose curls of Berry’s mane, dark streaks of tears dampening her lavender coat.

She pulled Berry in, till their faces were mere inches apart, till they could feel their mutual breath tickling one another’s noses. Berry’s violet eyes were as deep and wide as the sea, overflowing as she searched Minuette’s face for an answer.

“Because silly, I-”

Minuette woke up.

Something bright green was in her mouth. Minuette gagged and spat it out, realizing then that whatever it was covered her whole body as its saliva soaked wetness simply flopped back down atop her face.

“Gack!”

She kicked out with both hooves, leaping from the mound of towels, dragging the soaked green and white beach towel to the floor with her as it clung wetly to her coat. Once free of its clutches, she stared blinking out the front window at the bright noontime bustle of Ponyville beyond. She saw Ditzy Doo darting to and fro, shoving post into letterboxes, careening from one side of the street to the next. More than once she would facehoof and double back, frantically replacing mail in one box with mail from another. Minuette shook herself free of the spectacle and stood.

She brought a hoof to her chest, to quell her racing heart.

That was…that was totally inappropriate.

Cold sweat ran down her spine, and she shivered as the memories of the night before came rushing back.

My name is Ruby Pinch…

Mommy works there most nights…

I need ya, Pinchy needs ya…

Wow, Minuette thought, my subconscious is damn good at putting two and two together.

I know, right?

Don’t make this weird brain. Well, weirder.

Toooo laaaate….

“Agh! Shut up!” She was beginning to notice the onset of a rather prominent headache. Wincing as its throb began its travel from her frontal lobe to begin the classic hangover tapdance upon her temples, she trotted over to the kitchen. All of the perishables in the refrigerator back in Canterlot had been thrown in an ice chest for the trip, and one of the first things Minuette had done yesterday afternoon was get the contents of the cooler back out and into her new fridge here. She had yet to clean up the large puddle of former ice on the kitchen tile created from her haphazard drag and drop of milk, juice, onions, potatoes and such.

She pulled out a carrot and the milk carton, taking a large bite and a swig without bothering hunting for a glass. According to the table clock in the kitchen, it was now almost 2pm.

At least its dark in here, I don’t think I’m going to be leaving the house today. Direct sunlight right now would be…unhelpful.

As if to emphasize the point, the little pony dancing in her brain seemed to trip, careening into the wall of her skull with a mischievous “whoops!” Minuette could only take another swig, and do her best not to turn her head too quickly.

Ugh. If I’m this bad I can only imagine what Berry’s going to be like when she wakes-

Minuette made a small *meep!*

Celestia’s tits, Berry’s here right now. Right upstairs. In my bedroom.

The dream was still prominent in her mind. The light, the sounds, her smell-

Damn the dream. I can’t think about it right now. I…I need to go up there and check on her. It’s the right thing to do.

Minuette felt her heart beating faster again. She drained the last of the milk carton set it down on the table.

Each step on the staircase seemed to be as loud as the entire house collapsing during an earthquake, Minuette didn’t know how much of that was the hangover, and how much was the rising level of terror she felt with every step. Finally she reached the landing, and could hear the now semi-familiar sound of Berry’s snoring.

Still asleep, that’s good. The longer she sleeps, the more sober she’ll be when she wakes up.

Berry had moved from her position last night. She had kicked the covers free at some point and was now splayed across most of the bed, legs stuck out at crazy angles. Her mouth was hanging open. Once again Minuette couldn’t help but find the display a little amusing, stifling a chuckle as she went over to check the cookpot.

Empty. In a way not a good thing, getting some of that alcohol out of her the direct way might have been preferable to having it all metabolize in her body overnight.

Minuette’s assessment could probably have been summed up by somepony else as “Damn, she can hold her liquor!”

She checked the blinds again, saw that none were letting in any light, and deftly attempted to re-cover Berry as best she could. Minuette took care not to actually touch Berry’s skin, feeling more than a little dirty after the place her mind had taken her in the night. She also left the cookpot where it was, just in case, though the worst was probably over by now. Berry looked much better as well; her face was peaceful, unmarred by whatever remembered pain had surfaced last night.

Satisfied her obligation as hostess was accomplished, Minuette did not spend a moment longer in the room than she had to, not until she had some time to think. Doing something with her hooves had always helped her think, perhaps preparing some food for Berry when she did wake up to take the edge off her hangover would be just the thing. It’s not like a cold glass of milk and a carrot shoved under her nose when she finally regained consciousness would be polite or sufficient.

Minuette busied herself quietly pulling out and setting up kitchen things. Her other cookpot, and lid, a big spoon and her can opener, some water from the sink-

“Hayseeds and Manticore snot!”

The stale copper smell filled the kitchen, and Minuette once again had to wait a bit for the pipes to clear. While she waited, thoughts began to bubble free from the mental lid she had them clamped under.

The last time she’d had dreams like that was back in college, it was one of the reasons Minuette tried to avoid drinking too much. Because they inevitably let her to make bad decisions. She had always…admired Moondancer from an aesthetic perspective…

That’s a nice way to put it.

But obviously Minuette had simply been overjoyed that somepony as talented and beautiful as her would want to take the time to be Minuette’s friend, and was quite content to keep it that way.

Then there was the debacle at the-well, let’s not relive the details of THAT too shall we? The point was it took weeks of apologizing and Melodia acting as a go between delivering said apologies before Moondancer finally forgave me. And this is exactly the same thing, happening again. Berry has a child, which means she is quite obviously straight. Why do I do this to myself?

Minuette put those thoughts aside for the moment, focusing on food preparation.

Now, since hangovers are dehydration sickness, the key is to hydrate the patient as much as they can stomach. So lots of liquids, and then more liquids disguised as food.

Minuette pulled out another carrot, a couple tomatoes and potatoes, some celery stalks and an onion and proceeded to chop them all up with a head of broccoli.

I wonder if Berry takes meats in her food?

The majority of ponies, something like three quarters, were nominally vegetarian, consuming only dairy products and sometimes eggs to augment their diet with protein. It was kind of unavoidable, since eggs and milk went into nearly all baked goods. Minuette knew some hard core vegan ponies, her friend Melodia was one of them. But a significant minority of ponies also ate meat to varying degrees. Scientists said it was in response to the transition from the herd/prey animal ancient pony ancestors had been, to the more intelligent gatherer/hunter tribes ponies formed as they mastered tool making. Minuette had read a fascinating article in Equestrian Geographic magazine once about an ancient tribe of Pegasi believed to be highly predatory and almost exclusively meat eating. Pegasi had historically been the last of the pony subspecies to develop agriculture. In fact, the tribe that had taken part in the founding of Equestria itself had not at all, instead relying on earth pony tribute in return for weather manipulation.

Minuette herself did have a bit of a meat tooth so to speak, and occasionally enjoyed ham and poultry, and was debating on whether throwing some chicken in the soup.

Better to err on the side of caution I think. The potatoes provide a lot of nice absorbent starch already; it will have to be enough.

Minuette left the chicken in the fridge. She could always grill it for dinner after Berry had left.

By the time the soup had been brought to a nice frothy boil, Minuette’s headache had lessened to the point she could look around relatively quickly without the edges of her vision shrinking into hazy shadow. In hindsight, it probably hadn’t been smart to be chopping vegetables by hoof in this state. Still, she might even be able to hazard attempting some magic soon.

Experimentally, she reached out with her mind, and saw the characteristic sparkle of the levitation field engulf the stirring spoon on the countertop. The pony inside her head began breaking out the power tools. The pain was substantial, but Minuette thought she could feel it leveling off at a manageable level, enough maybe she could levitate Berry’s soup up-

“Hey.”

Minuette dropped the spoon with a dull clatter and leaped almost a full meter into the air before falling in a heap and rolling into the corner countertop. Behind her was Berry Punch, giant brown comforter wrapped around her like a cloak, bleary eyed and bloodshot.

“Woah. You’re really jumpy.” She stuck out a hoof to help Minuette up.

“You…startled me. I thought you were still asleep.” Minuette managed between gasping breaths that felt like they were sucking her lungs back into position after they had tried to vault out her throat.

Berry winced as minuette spoke. “Please. Not so loud. Somepony really botched the lobotomy they gave me last night.”

Berry sank into a chair at the kitchen table, putting her head in her hooves and moaning slightly. Minuette started to speak again, but stopped after the first syllable at Berry’s upraised hoof.

After a few moments of uncomfortable silence, Minuette took the lid off the soup and resumed stirring. Outside, a taxi carriage trotted by, kicking up a light cloud of dust that sparkled in the afternoon sun. Minuette was once again reminded of the dream.

I hope she’s not upset with me. Oh Celestia, I wonder how much of last night she remembers? Does she even remember me? I wish she would say something…

“So.” Berry said, as if reading her thoughts. “Minuette?”

Minuette stopped stirring and came to sit on the other side of the kitchen table. “Yes Berry?”

“Is this your house?”

“It is Berry. Across town from Café Celeste. I-” But Berry raised a hoof again.

“And…that was your bedroom I was sleeping in?” Berry was gripping the blanket awfully tight, Minuette thought.

“Yes...”

Berry's bloodshot eyes locked with Minuette’s. “Please. Tell me we didn’t…didn’t do anything last night. Not last night, of all nights…”

What?

“What’s so important about last ni-”

“TELL ME!” Berry lunged across the table and grabbed Minuette’s hooves, preventing her from recoiling away.

“No! No, damn it! We didn’t do anything! I dragged you upstairs and threw you in my bed and slept on a heap of towels down here.”

Damn you subconscious! How could you do that to me, showing me something that beautiful when there’s less than zero chance of it ever happening?!

Berry fell back into her seat. “Oh. Oh thank Celestia.”

Minuette could not hide how angry she was quickly becoming. “Don’t worry Berry, I’m not the kind of person to take advantage of ponies when they are unable to protect themselves. Or have the judgment to say no.”

Berry’s eyes went wide. “I…I didn’t mean-”

Minuette got up and turned away. “I’ve made soup. It will help take the edge off that hangover. You’re welcome to some, but afterward I would appreciate it if you would leave.”

With that, she trotted out of the kitchen and up the stairs, leaving Berry alone at the table.

Chapter 5 (Friendship)

Friendship

I could have planned that better.

Minuette was sitting on the bed in her bedroom, staring at the empty cookpot on the floor. She had been so upset when she stormed up here, and now that several minutes had passed she wasn't sure what to do. Berry had not left yet, of that she was certain. She had not heard the front door open downstairs, though Berry was not eating, there was no clink of ceramics or silverware. No dribbling of poured soup. It sounded like she must still be just sitting there.

How could she have said something like that? The first words out of her mouth after I had dragged her halfway across town, let her sleep in my bed...I made her soup dammit!

Minuette felt profoundly hurt. That Berry would think so little of her as to assume something like...like that went down. They had such a wonderful time last night, even a pony as time conscious as Minuette had not noticed as the hours melted away, swapping stories. Though, in hindsight, Minuette had done most of the talking.

That's strange, I'm usually the quietest pony in the room. Even soft spoken Melodia would always be able to get a word in edgewise in conversations when she wanted to. I must have talked last night more than I have in the last week, two weeks maybe since I've been such a hermit lately.

Berry had sat and listened through it all, she even gave good advice, Minuette would wager bits to sand that Thumbtack's hardware was the place she had noticed with the smithy on the way to Cafe Celeste last night.

Even when Berry was falling down drunk she was kind, perhaps untactfully blunt, but still...Minuette had seen every type of drunk at the Canterlot University party scene, usually dragged to said parties kicking and screaming by Moondancer. But drunk Berry Punch was just regular Berry Punch, plus expletives and an inability to enunciate. It had been...refreshing.

Maybe her fear about what happened wasn't a reflection of what she thinks of me. In all likelihood she barely remembers me. You don't drink three Rainbooms and wake up the next morning with perfect recall.

Maybe Berry said what she said because of how she views herself.

What a horrible thought. To have such a low opinion of yourself, that your first thought waking up in a strange place is not what happened, but oh Celestia what did I do?

Or who did I do?

And then, even more horribly, how much of Minuette's so-called righteous indignation had actually been embarrassment and shame?

Lest we forget where our own thoughts wandered recently. Pot calling the Kettle black much?

So I schlepped her halfway across town, and put her up in my bed, and made her soup. Berry knew none of that when she woke up.

The soft call of "Minuette?" came from beyond the threshold of her door.

Minuette felt her breath catch in her throat. Berry had somehow made it up the stairs while she had been absorbed in her thoughts. I can't talk to her right now, not after what I said...

The voice came again, almost plaintive. "Colgate?"

Pinchy! Breakfast!

Minuette couldn't help but smile at the memory. Even if something like that could never be...she could try for something like it. Friendship. Perhaps not the kind of love she wished for, no, ached for. But if friendship was all Berry could give her, that would be enough, more than enough.

One more chance.

She got to her hooves and opened the door with her magic, Berry had been raising a hoof to knock, and swiftly looked away.

"Yes Berry?"

The earth pony opened her mouth, then closed it, jaw working.

It's like she didn't expect me to answer, or perhaps she expected me to just scream at her to leave again. Why does this woman always assume the worst?

After a few seconds Berry seemed to settle on words. They were the fairly obvious ones: "Colgate I'm so sorr-"

Minuette put up a hoof, mimicking Berry earlier. "Don't. Don't apologize. Explain. If I understand why, then forgiving you is easy."

Berry seemed to pull the blanket tight again.

"I...I'm not comfortable talking about it."

"Why not?"

"Because..." Berry brought her eyes up to meet with Minuette. There was apology in them, wide and fearful that she had committed a wrong that could not be fixed. But also...determination.

"Are we friends Colgate?"

Minuette could not hide her snort. "That's a hell of a thing to ask me right now."

Berry held her gaze. "I know. If you forgave me, if I had not said what I said, would we be friends?"

Minuete didn't even have to think for that one. "Yes Berry, last night was wonderful, I haven't had that much fun in weeks, months even. It felt good just to talk, I guess I needed to vent, after everything that happened in Canterlot, after losing my store. And you listened to it all. You bought me dinner, and drinks. I don't think anypony has shown me such kindness mere minutes after meeting me. You even made me feel better about my nickname."

Berry smiled slightly and nervously ran a hoof through her mane, catching some of the tangled curls. She still had a vise grip on the blanket. "Yeah I remember, I actually remember most things, even when I get really..."

But Minuette interrupted. "And that's what hurt so much about what you said earlier. I felt like it came out of nowhere. So help me to understand. I must have given you half my life story last night, and I never once mentioned kidnapping mares I just met and stealing off to my lair to have my way with them."

She hoped the little joke would help Berry feel less uncomfortable. It got a chuckle, but did not lift the dark cloud that had descended on her bedraggled features.

Berry took a deep breath, like a gambler laying all her chips upon a risky bet she wished she didn't have to make. Minuette knew the feeling. It remained to be seen if she could even be successful in Ponyville.

"Alright, then let me ask you something Colgate. What's more important to you, finding out why I get pessimistic when it comes to me and alcohol and ponies I care about or that friendship you were just waxing poetic about?"

That threw Minuette back on her heels.

Berry continued her counter. "Like I tried to say before, I'm very sorry I said what I did. I won't make excuses, but I'm just not ok with talking about why. I'm asking you to respect my privacy about this. We um...did just meet yesterday after all."

She watched Minuette a moment, who sat digesting her words. Minuette was more than a little taken aback by the abruptness with which she had been put on the defensive in this conversation. Berry certainly did not dance around an issue. And...her words rang true. They had just met yesterday. Berry had been twice as hung over as Minuette, still was. That she was this lucid and shrewd was an impressive thing in its own right, Minuette's brain was certainly hurting. And...Minuette had gone there, in her own mind, last night. Friendship with Berry was more important than this. More important than most things really.

"All right. I forgive you."

Berry sighed relief. "Thanks."

Minuette reached out to take up Berry's hoof in her own. "But. In the future, if you wake up in a strange place with a spotty memory, instead of letting your mind take you to the dark places it goes, just ask me what happened. You'll save yourself from a lot of whatever it is that's eating at you."

Berry sat down on the bed next to Minuette, suddenly seeming very tired. "That sounds...pretty nice actually. I'm a mare with problems Colgate, but I'm...I'm trying to do right by me and mine."

Minuette dared to reach around and give Berry a quick squeeze. "Me too."

They sat like this for a time, Berry slumped against Minuette's shoulder, occasionally grimacing as her headache came and went in throbbing waves. Minuette's too began to assert itself.

It's probably time to get that soup into both of us.

"Berry?"

"Yeah Colgate?"

"While this is all very intimate and cathartic, it probably would be good for you to get some of that soup in you now."

Berry laughed weakly. Shaking slightly as she got up. "Yeah. Um, help me down the stairs would you?"

Minuette's eyes widened. "Are you feeling dizzy? Oh Berry, you should have said something! Lie down you silly pony while I make you some more pillows."

Berry eyed the bed. Minuette could feel the lavender mare's discomfort.

"...Or I could help you down the stairs."

***

A few minutes later and Berry was sipping down some of the vegetable soup Minuette had served up in a large mixing bowl.

Between sips, Berry was apologizing again. "I swear I'm not like this all the time Colgate. I just have...bad days. And I'm loads better than I used to be."

Minuette smiled as she spooned out another helping of soup. "I meant what I said Berry, I may not like it, but you don't have to explain. Just tell me about it when you're ready, and we know each other a little better."

Then Minuette had an idea. "If you're feeling up to it Berry, perhaps you could tell me a little about yourself? I did so much talking last night, and I feel like I got to hear barely anything about you."

Minuette took the next bite of soup herself. Normally she would have been worried about Berry's germs, but she was in no mood to go hunting for proper silverware. They had been making do with the single large serving spoon till now.

Berry wiggled deeper into the covers she had brought down with her and sighed. "That's fair, though I don't much like to jaw about me. Feels like vanity or something I guess."

"Berry, you evidently have some vices, but from what I can tell vanity isn't one of them." Minuette ran a hoof through her own mane and lamented how frazzled it felt, she must look like she got struck by lightning or something.

"Yeah, I guess we got Rarity for that." Berry took the spoon from Minuette's field of magic and shoved another mouthful of potatoes in. "This is really good soup Colgate."

Minuette smiled at the compliment. "Yes well father was always so helpless around the kitchen, it was up to me to make sure either of us had anything edible for-hey!" Minuette narrowed her eyes in suspicion. "No fair changing the subject on me! I've done all the talking, let's hear something about your family."

Minuette allowed the smile tugging at the corner of her lips to show. "If you're not going to be forthcoming, then I have some theories in that regard."

Berry raised her characteristic eyebrow. "Oh?"

Like pulling teeth with this pony...

"So, is Ruby Pinch your daughter?"

Berry looked up, eyes wide. "How did-"

Aha! Got you!

Minuette grinned in triumph. "I encountered her spider, Desmond, and her shortly after near Town Hall. That's how my dress got so dusty and rumpled."

"You said you took a roll in a ditch!"

Minuette sighed. "I basically did, and I was afraid of making a fuss on my first night in town. It was my fault really, though as I say that it sounds insane. Honestly, how did she take a liking to a creature like that?"

Berry laughed, then clutched her forehead and winced. "I dunno what she was thinking. I'm sure your first reaction to him was like mine. Sheer terror."

Minuette couldn't help but ask. "And Princess Luna...was really here in Ponyville? You got to hear her speak?"

Berry cringed at Minuette's choice of words. "Oh yeah. Princess Luna doesn't seem to understand volume control too well. I think she walks around all day with her voice magically enhanced to megaphone levels."

"I assumed she just did that for speeches when I saw her at last year's Winter Solstice celebration in Canterlot..." Minuette reached around to stir the soup pot again.

Berry smiled an evil smile. "Nope, that's on all the time. Terrified the hell out of us when she showed up for Nightmare Night in Ponyville, wanting to take part in the celebrations."

"Why in Equestria would she pay a personal visit to Ponyville?"

"Jealous Colgate?"

Minuette pouted. "No."

Berry reclined back in the chair, wrapping the comforter around her torso. "I figure it like this, she's only really met a few ponies since she came back, and Twilight Sparkle and her bunch are the ones that have made the biggest mark on her life in a thousand years, probably more."

Minuette gasped. "Twilight was the one who turned her back into Princess Luna?!"

Berry facehoofed. "Celestia's mercy have you been living under a rock? No, you can't have that excuse, you lived in Canterlot, how could you not know that?! I heard there was a huge ceremony at the palace and everything!" Berry was incredulous. "It was all over the radio two years ago!"

"Oh! Yes now I remember, Twilight moved to Ponyville right after that. She left with such abruptness, not even a fare-you-well. Melodia was quite offended." Minuette gave her head a speculative clonk with a hoof, as if checking to see if any further pertinent memories might be dislodged.

Satisfied she wasn't getting any more, Minuette tapped a hoof to her chin. "Well when you put it like that, I see what you mean. Princess Luna always seemed less...personable than her sister. I feel like I could just walk up to Celestia and tell her my concerns." Minuette shook her head. "I know that's silly, and Celestia is probably nothing like that in private, but she has an excellent rapport with her subjects."

Berry nodded, then continued, this time without further prodding. "Anyway, Princess Luna is a bit...behind the times, let's say."

Minuette vented a most unladylike snort.

"So she scared the willies out of most of the town when she visited, with the lightning and the voice and turning toys into real spiders. She thought it was a way to make the game more fun. She's lucky she didn't give Mr. Breezy or old Waddle a heart attack."

Berry brooded into the soup. "I had been um...drinking for some time before then, so I initially thought the one crawling up to me at the *cough* adult punch stand was a hallucination."

Then, something happened. Whatever Berry was remembering now, it transformed her expression, her posture. She smiled at Minuette. A real smile, the first that included Berry's eyes since Minuette had first met her, Minuette realized. Even last night, even after all that laughter, Berry's eyes had not sparkled with mirth like they did now. It was...Celestia's mercy she's beautiful when she smiles like that.

Berry had not seemed to notice how hypnotically Minuette was staring at her. "So Pinchy runs up in her little ladybug costume and picks up the beastie in front of me and says in the cutest voice you could imagine: 'Mommy, can I keep him?' I nearly fainted when I realized it was real."

Minuette giggled herself. "You must have been afraid for Pinchy."

Berry nodded. "I was beside myself with fear for Pinchy, the spider was huge, and so I scooped her up and ran, ran all the way back to our apartment above Cafe Celeste-"

Minuette choked on soup. "WHAT?! You mean to tell me you LIVE above that restaurant? I dragged you halfway across town, FROM YOUR HOUSE?!"

Berry shrank into the comforter under Minuette's furious glare. "I'm...I'm sorry?"

Minuette was sucking down air a little bit faster than was safe. "No. Not this time, this time you explain. You didn't think that little tidbit worthy of the eight or so hours of discussion we had last night? I think I told you where I live, I'm pretty sure I did anyway." Minuette's rage became more speculative as she scratched her head, as if tugging the hairs could yank alcohol shrouded memories free.

Berry answered for Minuette's brain. "You did, and that's just the thing." she tapped her hooves together, taking great care in her word choice again, it was a habit Minuette was starting to notice. Berry could be blunt on a dime, but nuance with her seemed to require a bit of time. Berry wasn't stupid, she was just...careful when she thought it mattered, and not when she didn't.

She began again. "You came from Canterlot, with more money than I've ever made in my life to come live with the peasant villagers in a tiny town in the sticks."

Minuette's protest was cut off as Berry continued.

"I know you don't mean to come off like that, I know you're not like that, and after talking with you, hearing how you feel about Canterlot and what you had to say about town, I know coming here was a good thing for you. But by Ponyville standards, you're richer than sin. Maybe even as rich as Rarity."

Berry took a breath. "And I'm...not. I'm a tenant above a restaurant. Horte is my landlord and also my boss. I work the bar at night, and the money goes to rent or to Pinchy's schooling."

She looked at Minuette's house, in almost wistful admiration. "I don't have any savings, not really. Just a little each year for summer camp for Pinchy and maybe enough for a little side project I'm hoping to do with Sweet Apple Acres one day."

Minuette's anger had abated as she listened. "Berry...were you worried I would think less of you for being poor?"

"...Yeah."

Minuette sighed. "Do you see a pattern here Berry?"

"Yes. Yes Dammit! I know, but-it's so hard to break out of this mindset. It's hard to unlearn."

Berry wiped an eye with the blanket.

"I've failed at nearly everything I've ever set out to do Colgate. I never completed my education. I...I had Pinchy at a very difficult time in my life, before I was ready for a child. I love her more than anything, but I can't provide for her the life she deserves without a degree. I held it together long enough to get out with a technical certificate in business, but that's not worth much anywhere but here. And on top of it I'm sabotaging myself at every turn with this damn drinking and thinking everypony hates me as much as...as..."

Minuette knelt next to Berry, and engulfed her in the fiercest hug she could. "I don't hate you Berry Punch. Not one bit. That may not count for much after everything you've been through, but I promise, that whatever happens from now on, I will be here to help you."

Berry leaned into Minuette, returning the hug. "Thanks Colgate, I...really need somepony to lean on right now."

Then, as they released the embrace, Berry spoke again. "But...why? What did I do to deserve such kindness from somepony I barely know?"

Minuette blushed, though, thank Celestia, not so much that Berry guessed its true meaning. "I'll tell you someday. I get to have secrets too."

Berry chuckled. "All right, fair enough. We'll tell each other when we both feel ready. Deal?"

Minuette grinned, and stuck out a hoof. "Deal!"

Note: So sorry for the long wait time everypony. Was super busy this month writing stuff for friends and other projects. Finals at Uni are looming as well. Vacation soon, and with it more regular updates.

Chapter 6 (Muffins)

Muffins

New Cast:

Cheerilee

Pinkie Pie

Fluttershy

Mail from Orchard Boulevard to Ponyville Elementary had been delivered, and Ditzy Doo found herself near the center of town in the modest shopping district and market that ran the length of Marzipan Lane. Capped on one end by Town Hall and the other by Sugarcube Corner, it was under the frosting and gingerbread facade of the latter that Ditzy Doo ended her mail run for the early afternoon.

Sugarcube Corner, famous throughout Ponyville for its scrumptious treats, was a delight for the eyes as well as the mouth. Frosting seemed to run down the face of the roof to collect in the crooks, seams and indentations and bulge out over the edge, forever trapped in the moment before dripping down. Ditzy was pleased to note that there were exactly seventeen such collections to a side, which translated to thirty eight shingles between each, with a mean surface area per shingle that was also incidentally seventeen, though centimeters squared this time.

A muffin sounds good right about now. And speaking of seventeen and things incidentally correlating, I wonder if, even though there is no pattern in prime numbers, there might be something predictable about some other aspect of them. Like how often a digit appears in a group of them. Not really a pattern, but like those neat experiments at Canterlot University with electrons and quantum uncertainty, something the numbers "tend" to do. That would be super cool. Like a...a...pseudopattern!

Ditzy Doo loved prime numbers, they were special numbers. Numbers that stood alone and apart from their contemporaries, but were still within the beautiful chain to which all numbers belonged. A prime number was one of a kind, indivisible except by one and itself. You couldn’t multiply any of the other ones to make a prime, you couldn’t predict when the next prime would happen unless you knew all the ones before it, and they were almost always odd. She could empathize with odd.

Ditzy scratched her nose with a wing, brow furrowed in thought. Several ponies had to walk around her as she stood in the middle of the sidewalk, seemingly staring off into space.

The delivery mare had been called "odd" from as far back as she could remember, and to be fair, she was. Her rather bland coloration of grey coat and blonde mane never really attracted much attention. And her cutie mark, a cluster of soap bubbles, was equally nondescript. Well, unless you REALLY looked at them, then you would see they were special, just like her. But for the casual observer, the most distinctive feature was her eyes. Nopony she had ever met had eyes like hers.

Ditzy liked her eyes. They gave her a perspective on the world others lacked. It came with a cost to be sure, lack of depth perception made for slightly erratic flying, and as a Pegasus that was an essential part of her life. She envied graceful ponies like Rainbow Dash and the rest of the weather team, they could pull of stunts and maneuvers Ditzy would seriously injure herself if she ever tried. When she was younger, it had made her sad sometimes, especially in flight school. Always progressing slower than anypony else, well, almost anypony else, had been a real struggle for her.

She turned her attention to Sugarcube Corner again. Ponies lined up all the way out the front door and milled about on the sidewalk beyond, and it looked like Mr. and Mrs. Cake had kicked into overdrive to meet the needs of the post-lunch crowd. Tarts, pies, cakes of all manner and type, and more pedestrian desserts for the ponies with less imagination, or less time to snack, were all on display and going as fast as they could be stocked.

Despite the Cake's best efforts, the apple glaze donuts were running out, again. And this time it wasn't even Pinkie Pie's fault. In fact, in addition to not eating her usual 7-10% of the Cake's entire stock; Pinkie had been manning the counter with unusual circumspection and calm (for Pinkie), refraining from challenging random customers to cupcake eating contests, taffy jump rope (What? It stretches the taffy!) or placing the occasional confetti firecracker in somepony's bag with their treats.

Instead, she stood behind the counter, cheek splitting grin plastered over her face, looking about ready to burst in anticipation of...something. Most ponies making purchases just shrugged it off as inscrutable Pinkie Pie, nopony really knew how her mind worked. A few however were a bit nonplussed and eyed the neon pink Earth Pony with some wariness as they completed their transactions. Ditzy did her best to get by without ruffling anypony's feathers or stepping on any hooves but-

"Ooh! Sorry!"

The press of bodies made the outer store near impassable, and the limited height meant flying over the other customers was not an option. Her efforts to get by were beginning to attract negative attention.

"If I could just-"

"Hey!"

"Oops...my bad."

"Wait your turn!"

"I just need to-"

"Derpy! Go to the back of the line!"

Flitter and Cloudchaser, an inseparable pair of pale lilac colored Pegasi, glared at Ditzy Doo till she shrank away into an unoccupied side of the store, near a broom closet and some folded up tables, where she fell to her haunches with a whimper.

"Oh, that's...that's ok, I can wait."

Several other members of the line harrumphed in satisfaction. Ditzy looked down at the floor, retreating into her thoughts. It was much nicer in there.

Two, three, five, seven, eleven, thirteen, seventeen, nineteen, twenty three, twenty nine, thirty one, thirty seven, forty one, forty three, forty seven, fifty three, fifty nine, sixty one, sixty seven, seventy one, seventy three, seventy nine, eighty three, eighty nine, ninety seven, one hundred and one...

"Um...pardon me?"

One hundred and three, one hundred and seven, one hundred and nine, one hundred and thirteen, one hundred and twenty seven, one hundred and thirty one, one hundred and thirty seven, one hundred and thirty nine, one hundred and forty nine, one hundred and fifty one...

"Derpy?"

The grey mare looked up in fear, not sure if she had given some further offense. But a new pony was standing before her, a dandelion gold Pegasus smiling beneath a long flowing mane of warm pink.

"Oh! Hi Fluttershy. I'm not in your way am I?"

Fluttershy giggled, brushing a lock of her mane out of her eyes. "You're in the corner Derpy, you're not in anypony's way."

Ditzy Doo looked behind herself to find the wall, like she hadn't realized it was there before. "...Oh, right. I was in the way a minute ago."

"Yes. About that." Fluttershy glanced with disapproval at Flitter and Cloudchaser, happily gabbing at each other and not paying either Ditzy Doo or Fluttershy a second glance.

"Are you here to buy something Derpy?" Fluttershy asked when she had turned back.

Ditzy Doo pawed the ground with a hoof. "No...well, kinda. I'm delivering mail for the Cakes, but I wanted a muffin on the way out..."

Fluttershy smiled. "Of course, I think that's a wonderful idea Derpy. Why don't you come stand in line with me? I was pretty close to the front."

Ditzy Doo grinned even as her lazy eye rolled over to the counter, where Pinkie waved at them both, looking slightly frantic.

Fluttershy helped Ditzy Doo to her hooves and headed back into the throng.

"Pardon me, I'd like to get back in line now if that's all right?" Fluttershy made to step in front of a green and gold Earth Pony.

The other pony shook her head with a huff. "No, it's not all right, you can't cut in line, what if I let you through, only to snatch the last apple glaze donut? I can already see they are running out. I learned my lesson the hard way last cider season, no can do lady." The green pony attempted to close ranks even more with the other line members.

"But...I was here before, right in front of you." Fluttershy looked over at Ditzy. "I only left so I could get my friend here."

"I...uh...I don't remember that!" The Earth Pony turned away, as if this concluded the matter.

Ditzy Doo saw Fluttershy's eye twitch ever so slightly and she began muttering under her breath. "When somepony tries to block...no no no, one two three, three two one." Calm returned to her darkening expression and she gave her best smile.

"Um...listen please, I don't want a donut, I'm getting a raspberry tart and my friend here is getting a muffin, plus she is delivering some uh-very important mail for the Cakes. They've been waiting all week for this post to arrive, I don't think they'd like it very much if you held her up like this."

"Oh! Er...well, when you put it like that..." The Earth Pony looked over at the counter, where Pinkie was waving them over. "I see. I'll get out of your way."

Fluttershy smiled again. "Thank you very much."

A few moments later and they were at the front, and Ditzy was able to plop down a pile of mail with one of her wings. "Hey Pinkie Pie."

"FINALLY! Do you know how long I've been waiting for a speaking role?!" The almost painfully pink Earth Pony snatched the mail with a derisive snort and tossed it behind her head, landing somewhere in the kitchen beyond.

The Earth Pony for whom Fluttershy had "enhanced" the truth about the importance of the mail earlier gave a scandalized sputter from somewhere behind them, and Fluttershy very pointedly did not look back. Instead she cocked her head and tried to fathom what this latest nonsensical outburst from her friend could possibly mean.

"Speaking role? What?"

"FIVE CHAPTERS, six if you count the prologue!" Pinkie was hyperventilating.

Ditzy Doo eyed the muffins behind the glass of the display kiosk. Chocolate blueberry...

Pinkie continued her rant. "BUT, it will all be worth it in the end, in return for my silence, I was promised a new pony in town, someone I haven't yet thrown a Welcome To Ponyville party for, and yesterday I confirmed it!"

(Of all the types of parties Pinkie Pie threw, the Welcome To Ponyville parties were the most legendary, so much so that the guest of honor would frequently attempt to escape after the first twenty hours or so. Having learned from experience, Pinkie scheduled games like hide and seek and zombie tag for this period, so that the other attendees could aid in hunting down and apprehending the fugitive pony and resume the festivities without interruption. All while maintaining an atmosphere of fun! Twilight Sparkle once described Pinkie as the most tenacious, ruthless and terrifyingly efficient party thrower in all of Equestria.)

Fluttershy put a hoof to her mouth. "Oh my! A new pony moved to town? That's wonderful news. How did you confirm it?"

"Like always! Twitchy tail, eye flutter, itchy flank silly! I mean Duh! That's one of the hardest ones to misinterpret!" Pinkie's grin had returned, wringing her hooves together like some villain plotting a scheme. She even vented a sinister cackle.

"As soon as I find this new pony, they are getting the mother of all surprise parties!"

"Remember Pinkie, we want to welcome them to town, not...startle or, or scare them." Fluttershy seemed to shudder at some memory. Probably several memories actually.

Pinkie vented an exasperated sigh. "What kind of a surprise party doesn't come with a surprise? Just leave this to Auntie Pinkie Pie!" Pinkie gave a mischievous wink. "I'm a pro after all."

Fluttershy facehoofed. "Pinkie, I'm a year-oh never mind. Can I have a raspberry tart please?"

Ditzy Doo pointed to the muffin rack with a wing. "And can I get one of the chocolate blueberry muffins?"

"Sure thing girls! One sec!" As Pinkie grabbed the merchandise and got the bags ready, she did what she was wont to do whenever there was a second of downtime. Babble.

"I don't think this new pony is going to be quite the most amazingest best friend forever type friend though. Probably just a regular best friend forever. 'Cause my flank is itchy, but not like SUPER itchy. When Twilight came to town, it was so bad it felt like a bee sting. Or a hemorrhoid! This one is more like a spider bi-"

"Oh my! Too much-um information Pinkie." Fluttershy had a pained look on her face. Ditzy Doo was checking other mail she had yet to deliver.

Hmm. I thought I delivered to Barley Terrace already...Oh! That nice Unicorn moved in the other day! I forgot her house! Wow, she is already getting letters the day after she moved in. This Melodia person must be a friend of hers. Well, it's close to here, no problem.

"How much do we owe you Pinkie?" Fluttershy pulled her purse from her saddlebags, letting loose a few butterflies that had been nestled within. Instead of darting about, they alighted on her mane, flapping their multicolored wings. A purple and blue one landed on Ditzy Doo's nose.

"Five bits for both." Pinkie said, making the register ping and pop open to accept Fluttershy's and Ditzy's proffered coins.

As they approached the exit, and Fluttershy was rounding up her butterflies, Ditzy was thinking again, too hard to notice the approach of a bright magenta Earth Pony with a strawberry and cream colored mane, her cutie mark obscured by saddlebags laden with school supplies and papers to grade. Many already were marked up with red pen, circles and question marks, scribbles requesting clarification of some concept or correcting a grammar or spelling error.

"Derpy!" A voice snapped apart the concentration of the grey Pegasus mare.

"Aww Cheerilee, I was counting and you made me lose my place!"

The magenta Earth Pony reached around to adjust a strap. "I'm sorry Derpy, I'm just...a little frayed at the moment. Have you seen my sister? Berry hasn't been around all day. Ruby said she never came home last night either.

Ditzy pushed her musings about patterns in prime numbers to the side for the moment. Though she was pretty sure there was a significant logarithmic correlation between the incidence of the number one as the first digit of a prime compared to two or three or whatever. At least in the first hundred primes or so. "I haven't seen her either, sorry."

Ditzy Doo smiled helplessly as Cheerilee continued to stare at her speculatively.

The Earth pony spoke again. "Well, Horte thinks she might have left last night with some pony. Apparently one that just moved to town. Know anything about that?"

One hundred and fifty seven, one hundred and sixty three, one hundred and sixty seven, one hundred and seventy thr-oh, I do know something about that.

"I do know something about that!" Ditzy Doo grinned in happy recognition.

Cheerilee brightened. "Oh that's great!"

Ditzy hopped into the air a little, grateful to have been useful. "Yeah, we misdirected some of her freight yesterday. Oh! And I forgot to deliver her mail today, so I need to go back anyway. I can take you."

Cheerileee sighed relief and wiped her forehead with a hoof. "Thank Celestia, you know how Berry gets around this time of year, I...I...just hope she didn't relapse. She promised me..."

Ditzy hadn't the foggiest idea what Cheerilee was talking about, but Ditzy's daughter Dinky had told her it was best sometimes to just say nothing and nod knowingly when other ponies told you stuff. Her daughter was such as smart girl. Good in school too, much better than Ditzy ever had been. And talented! She had the paintings on the fridge to show it, Ditzy wouldn't be surprised if Dinky's cutie mark ended up being art related.

"Derpy...what are you doing?"

"Nodding."

"Why?"

"I'm agreeing with you! Isn't that what nodding means?"

"I'm glad you agree, but I stopped talking a while ago." The Earth Pony gestured with a hoof. "Shall we go? The sooner we find Berry the sooner I can stop doubling down on my anxiety medication."

From Cheerilee's saddlebag erupted Pinkie Pie's head, livid with outrage. "You're going to see the new pony NOW?! But my shift isn't over for another four hours!" Then with a disparaging whimper, "I'm *sniff* I'm going be the last pony in town to meet her! It's not fair! I-ooh an apple!"

Pinkie's head dove back into the saddlebag, and moments later she leaped out, body and all, trotting back into Sugarcube Corner with a bright red apple clenched in her teeth.

"But that was for-" Cheerilee choked out, then dropped her hoof to her side. "-me."

After a moment's hesitation, she peered into her saddlebags, as if to make sure no wormholes or fourth dimensional spaces resided within. Ditzy was examining some clouds. And also Lyra and Bon Bon sitting on a bench to their left sharing a mango smoothie. Bon Bon waved at Ditzy's wandering eye, and received a friendly wing-waggle in return.

***

"Heeeeere we are!" Ditzy brandished a hoof at the two story home before her and Cheerilee. The lawn was dry and dying, and most of the plants in the front yard were wilted and discolored. The only indication that the building was inhabited was the many opened and unopened boxes that could be seen behind the patina of dust that coated the large living room window. Even the "In Escrow" sign was still jammed in the sod near the street.

Ditzy could see indentations in the gravel path leading to the front door, and what appeared to be a purse partly concealed by a mostly dead bush to the left of the front door. Paint on the lock was scratched and scraped, and numerous hoofprints clustered near the door with a few bits of gravel lodged in the skirt of the door itself.

"I think she's home." Ditzy said.

Cheerilee looked over quizzically. "Really? The building looks like it's halfway to condemned. What makes you say that?"

"Oh some stuff I see. Also, she probably has some friends over too!" Ditzy took a final bite of her muffin, spraying the last syllables of her sentence in a rain of chocolate blueberry chunks.

"Derpy. The house is dead looking."

"Yeah, but she left her purse outside there, and the gravel in the doorjam means she dragged somepony else inside. Not a box like the ones in the living room, 'cause it would have smoothed out all those hoofprints on the ground out here. Also, she has a leaky shower."

Cheerilee's jaw returned to its normal position to form words of incredulous disbelief. "How could you possibly know she has a leaky shower?!"

"She told me yesterday when she came out to claim her box." Ditzy was too busy pulling mail out of her saddlebags to see Cheerilee pulling her mane in gurgling frustration, before abruptly looking up, letting out a fearful gasp.

"Wait...did you say dragged? You don't...you don't think she..."

"Fell and hurt her leg?" Asked Ditzy helpfully.

"No! Kidnapping you bubble brain! Creepy house, signs of struggle, Berry missing all day! You do the math!"

"I love math! I had this great idea about pri-" Ditzy began.

Cheerilee grabbed Ditzy Doo and shook her. "Listen! We have to get inside this house. NOW."

Chapter 7 (Family)

Family

It had taken some convincing, mostly involving pointing out the lack of suitable substitutes, but Minuette had at last gotten Berry to stumble back upstairs and collapse on the bed again. Minuette had kicked the towels into a corner in an effort to make the couch frame look as unenticing as possible. Not because she wanted to make Berry uncomfortable, just the opposite. Minuette could feel several places in her back and around her withers where her muscles had knotted in the night.

With Berry hopefully asleep again, resuming unpacking was how the Unicorn chose to occupy the rest of the afternoon. She had at last cleared a big enough space in the dining area to situate her grandfather's table properly, and the smaller plastic one she and Berry had eaten on was shunted back into the living room and quickly covered in opened containers and spools of wiring tied together in bundles. Chairs were uncovered and put into place, lamps plugged in, carpets laid down, and a great deal of things simply moved to the cellar, still in their boxes.

The work was satisfying, and she could feel herself at last making a dent in the unpacking. It had taken her days to box up the store back in Canterlot, though how much of that was the genuine volume of material and how much was just...having to choose, again and again, between things she loved, Minuette was not sure. At least that part of the process was over now, and it was about getting the things she had saved situated. Making everything right and in its proper place again.

Minuette paused in her shuffling things about to run a hoof over the deep carved surface of the mahogany dinner table, the wellings of old varnish and lacquer, reapplied again and again till they formed waxy looking encrustations in the nooks and crevices of the patterns. Layer upon layer upon layer. Her grandfather, her father, her. As Minuette traced the pattern, the table's bum leg creaked.

I really should just knuckle down and drill some brackets into this thing. It's a miracle that glue has held on this long.

Minuette added it to her ever growing mental list of things yet to be done.

A few minutes more of rummaging found the portable clock radio from her old bedroom lodged in a rice cooker she had unpacked with the other kitchen things half an hour ago. It wasn't very loud, but with Berry sleeping upstairs that wasn't a bad thing. Minuette's stereo was probably still in the pile of boxes near the living room window.

By about 4:30 PM, Minuette noticed she was getting hungry again. Having missed breakfast entirely on account of being unconscious for half the day, this was hardly surprising. That chicken she had almost cooked earlier was sounding more and more delicious by the minute. And, as an added bonus, she had located her spice rack, shoved in the bottom of a box filled with books no less. She really had been a blubbering mess when she packed this all up hadn't she?

Minuette gleefully levitated out the spices and began gathering pans to the tune of [Looking Glass]. All the best classic rock and oldies stations were thankfully coming in quite clear, if a little tinny.

Minuette's friends did not share in her musical tastes, Melodia being a classical music buff with a sinful (from her perspective) and (mostly) secret love of the occasional country song. Moondancer, like most things, kept up with the modern styles and the club scene, and was heavily engrossed in something relatively new called "Dubstep."
The Unicorn swished her tail, placed pans and tossed vegetables to the beat. Even singing along a bit...with her own improvisations.

"And there's a girl in this harbor town,

And she works layin' whiskey down.

They say 'Berry, fetch another round.'

She serves them whiskey and wine.

The sailors say 'Berry, you're a fine girl,

What a good wife you would be.

Yeah your eyes could steal a sailor from the sea!'

Minuette rather self-consciously tapered off about the moment she caught herself using the jar of sea salt as a microphone, sheepishly placing it back on the counter.

Berry may have said she doesn't want to impose on me for dinner as well, but there's no harm in giving her a bit of salad for the road when she leaves for her evening shift at Cafe Celeste is there? Especially if I'm making one anyway.

Her friend had indeed turned out to be a vegetarian, though Berry had in her words "cooked so many meals with meat you wouldn't know it from smelling me in a kitchen." Then, added as an afterthought: "I do love milk though." Something she and Minuette had in common it seemed.

I guess a carrot and a glass of milk under her nose would have been well received then.

So does that mean that Ruby is the one that likes meat?

Minuette gasped and raised the knife she had been using to cut chicken before it touched the cucumber she was about to chop.

Nothing like a touch of Salmonella to put a damper on one's evening. Focus girl.

Keeping the first blade floating a safe distance away, she levitated out a fresh one from the box of silverware she had (at last) located and diced the cucumber and tomatoes.

Her magic had recovered well. Like a muscle, sometimes a little work was just the thing to make it feel better, and levitating boxes around for an hour or two had banished all pain associated with it. Though her original headache still persisted somewhat. Minuette swore that as soon as she found the box with the contents of her medicine cabinet, she was downing several aspirin tablets, oh yes.

Minuette had been listening to the background hum of the radio while she cooked, but she furrowed her brow as the current song abruptly changed.

That's strange, I don't remember Calf Steven's Peace Train having a chorus that was quite so...lame.

Oh, that's the doorbell again. Damn that's loud! New project, gut that stupid thing and install the old chime from the Canterlot store.

Minuette turned the radio off as she exited the kitchen, swinging open the front door to reveal two ponies. One Minuette knew, the eccentric mailmare Ditzy Doo, and one that Minuette was quite sure she had never met before, but nonetheless...seemed familiar somehow.

"Celestia's boiling...I didn't mean like that Derpy!" The new pony was staring in horror at Ditzy Doo, who was withdrawing a hoof from where it had hit the doorbell ringer.

The grey Pegasus looked down in chagrin. "But...that's what doorbells are for..."

Ditzy's companion facehoofed.

Minuette smiled in welcome. "Hello Derpy! I'm very happy to see you again so soon."

Ditzy looked up, expression warming instantly. "Hey Miss Romana! Nice to see you too. Um, dry and stuff."

"What? Oh yes, all better now. And your friend here, I don't believe I've met her." Minuette gave the newcomer an unsure smile.

Ditzy's companion, an infuriatingly familiar looking Earth Pony with bright magenta coloration was looking about half a meter above Minuette, where she abruptly realized she was still levitating a pair of glistening kitchen knives.

The magenta pony's expression was one of...deep concern.

"Oh! I'm sorry, I'm doing a bit of cooking." Minuette blushed and stretched out the sparkling field of energy, flinging both knives into the sink with a dull clang.

The other pony followed their arc with her eyes, only returning to look at Minuette when they disappeared over the lip of the sink.

Belatedly the newcomer stuck out a hoof. "...Not a problem. I'm Miss Cheerilee, one of the teachers at Ponyville Elementary."

Minuette took the hoof with a brief nod. "Minuette Romana. A pleasure."

With introductions complete, the seconds stretched into a pregnant silence. Punctuated by the trickle of what appeared to be crumbs from Ditzy Doo's mouth. Presently the grey Pegasus mare blurted into speech again.

"Hey! I have something for you Miss Romana! Um-again. Because we...erm, I forgot your mail. Though in a completely unrelated fashion to the way in which your stuff was misplaced last time."

Ditzy smiled. "So, worst case, I end up exhausting all possible ways to forget your mail, and then after that you get your mail on time every day. Which means that...hang on...carry the six...you only have to deal with misplaced post for the next four hundre-oh."

Ditzy deflated slightly. "...Nevermind, I'll try harder next time Miss Romana."

Minuette giggled. "It's no trouble Derpy, I only moved in yesterday, you can take some time to get used to my being here. As long as you keep coming by when you forget it's fine."

The grey Pegasus grinned and shoved a small stack of mail into Minuette's hooves: A letter from Melodia, statements from Canterlot Central Bank about her change of address, mane extension advertisements and a home gardening periodical from somepony named "Mr. Greenhooves."

Minuette looked up from the brochure, wincing at the comparison between the beautifully cultivated front yard in the picture on its cover and the rather dilapidated state of her own.

Somehow it hadn't looked quite so...dead in the housing pamphlet.

The picture the real estate agent gave me was probably months old, and nopony has been tending this yard since.

Minuette slid the brochure back into the mail stack, promising herself that fixing up the yard would be added to her *sigh* ever increasing pile of upcoming tasks.

It's not like my shop would attract any customers with a yard like this.

THAT thought firmly planted gardening somewhere near the front on her list. Luna's knickers...and she had thought unpacking was going to be the end of this debacle.

Cheerilee politely cleared her throat, interrupting Minuette's thoughts.

"Hm? I'm sorry, did you need something?" Inquired the Unicorn as she placed the mail next to her still unused house key on the living room end table.

Cheerilee reached into her saddlebags, pushing about what appeared to be paperwork of some kind till she produced a small photo. In it was Cheerilee herself at a beach, the Equestrian South Coast perhaps? She was smiling, standing next to a surfboard and-

Berry! Wow but she looks um... snug in that wetsuit.

"Have you seen the pony in this picture with me? She's my sister Berry Punch, and she's been missing since last night."

Minuette looked up, eyes wide.

Oh crap, it would look like that wouldn't it?

The voice came, unbidden to her brain, almost gleeful to remind her.

...If you were a stallion, this would be beyond creepy.

Stop it.

Minuette managed a slightly panicked smile. "Oh...she's not missing. She's here."

It was Cheerilee's turn to stare. "What?! Why? How did she get here?"

I stole her away from her home in a drunken stupor.

Crapcrapcrapcrapcrap.

Minuette scratched the gravel with a hoof. "She's um...sleeping over? We had dinner last night, got to know each other a bit and afterward...came here."

Oh gods above that sounds exactly how I was afraid it sounded.

Cheerilee's eyes went wide for a moment. "I...see."

Oh no you don't, but if I try to set you straight it will only make things worse. Oh Celestia's mercy, and after Berry went apoplectic at the thought of-

"May I see her? She's had me and her daughter Ruby very worried." Cheerilee did a dead ringer of Berry's cocked eyebrow.

Perfectly reasonable request. Can't be denied. Got to stall for time, explain to Berry.

Minuette hoped Cheerilee could not see the sweat beading down her temples.

"Won't you come in? I apologize for the mess, there's uncovered chairs in the living room. I'm still looking for the sofa cushions, think I might have accidentally put them in the cellar with the-"

You're panic babbling again.

Minuette kept the smile on as Cheerilee and Ditzy came in and seated themselves. "I'll go up and get her, she's asleep at the moment you see." Minuette quickly trotted up to the second floor landing.

"This is a really nice house Miss Romana!" Called Ditzy Doo from the bottom of the stairs. "Much bigger than Harvest's and mine!"

"Why thank you Derpy, I rather like it too!" Minuette responded. She gave her bedroom door a quick rap with a hoof "Berry?"

After a few seconds the door slid open, revealing the bleary eyed lavender Earth Pony, hair dementedly askance from being sandwiched between a skull and an improvised pillow.

"Mbfugin...is it five thirty already?" Berry scratched her flank with a forehoof, clutching the same big brown comforter as before.

Minuette hustled her back into the bedroom. "No, but your sister is here."

Berry gave an incredulous sputter. "What?!"

"She and Ruby have been looking for you all day, ever since you er...didn't come home last night. I'm so sorry Berry! This is my fault..." Minuette shut the door behind her with a bit of her magic. "They've been very worried about you."

Berry shook her head and threw the comforter back on the bed. "No, no, not your fault. Aw, hell. Of all the days she had to-oh. Damn it. She's making sure I...damn it."

Berry seemed to look far away for a moment, at some distant memory. "Why can't she just leave me be? She doesn't have any business..."

Silent brooding abruptly gave way to a much bleaker expression. "You said...you said Pinchy was worried?"

Minuette nodded. "Cheerilee said that yes."

"Oh...oh no. I don't...want that." Berry sank to her knees, Minuette following her down. "Not that..."

Minuette put a hoof on Berry's back. "Well, the important thing is you're fine and the sooner Cheerilee and Pinchy see that the better right?"

And the sooner my poor choice of words makes you furious with me again.

Berry looked up at Minuette, fear in her eyes. "Minuette...Colgate, If Cheerilee sees me like this, hell, if she smells me like this, she'll know I went drinking last night in a big way. I...promised her I wouldn't, I really wasn't going to, but...but..."

Minuette gave Berry a reassuring hug. "It's ok. What do you need me to do?"

Berry looked around, grabbing one of her rolled up towel-pillows. "I need you to stall her while I take a quick shower and get the stink of last night off me."

Berry stopped for a moment, as if remembering decorum. "Uh...is it all right if I borrow your shower Colgate?"

The Unicorn released the embrace. "Yes it is Berry, that's fine. I...think it would help if you gave your sister a quick hello from up here before you went in though."

"Good idea." Berry opened the door after doing the best she could to smooth out her hair. "Hey Cheerilee!"

The magenta Earth Pony below them jumped in her seat, spilling pills she appeared to be about to ingest. Cursing briefly and then looking up, she waved at Berry from the living room. "There you are! You had me worried sick you heartless...damn it Berry you know how I get when you go AWOL like that!"

Looking at her from behind, Minuette could see Berry's shoulders slump as Cheerilee's words hit home.

"I'm...sorry sis, I really am." Berry scratched the back of her head.

"You're always sorry Berry, I'm tired of it. And I'm not the only one." Cheerilee pulled out a fresh pair of pills and downed them. "Miss Romana, may I use your faucet to get some water?"

Minuette stuck her head out so Cheerilee could see. "Of course, feel free! The glasses are in that box on the table."

"Listen, Cheerilee, I gotta get ready for my shift, so I'm gonna freshen up and then I'll come down and you can grill me to your heart's content m'kay?" Berry stared for a moment, confused by Cheerilee's sudden blushing.

From the kitchen the magenta Earth Pony said: "Um...yeah, that's fine Berry do what you need to do."

As Berry closed the door, scratching her head she spoke to Minuette, "It's strange, she didn't ask if I'd been drinking."

Confession time.

Minuette gulped. "Berry. I...ah, may have inadvertently given Cheerilee an...incorrect impression."

Berry did her eyebrow thing. "Yeah?"

"...About the nature of our relationship." Minuette braced for the explosion.

For an interminable moment Berry was silent, expressionless.

Then she spoke the last thing Minuette thought she was going to ever hear: "I'd rather her think that than I went back to hitting the booze, roll with it."

Meep!

"Y-you're sure? I feel so bad about how upset you were earlier..." Minuette slumped onto her bedroom desk cushion, her knees suddenly weak.

Berry waved dismissively. "Misplaced concern and unreasonable panic on my part." Berry trotted over to the bathroom and turned on the shower, pausing as she gathered soap to turn back to Minuette, her expression unreadable.

Minuette felt like her cheeks were hot enough to toast bread. "I...uh. I better go entertain your sister, lest she come up here and investigate herself."

Berry watched her for another moment, then gave a small nod, and was gone into the cloud of gathering steam.

Be still, my beating heart.

***

"While we wait, I'd be happy to offer you some snacks or drinks." Minuette said on her way back down the stairs and to the kitchen.

"Got any muffins?" Ditzy exclaimed from Minuette's recliner chair. Cheerilee had taken a seat near the front door, on one of the swivel stools that had not yet made it into the kitchen.

"I'm sorry no, Derpy. But I do have salad, would that be all right?"

"Salad's fine too. Can I get mine with extra croutons?" Ditzy Doo started fiddling with the recliner lever till she got the chair to spring open, letting the Pegasus fully stretch herself out with a contented sigh.

"Oh! Um...sure." Minuette grabbed some bread and shoved it into the toaster. Slicing them up would make for passable croutons.

"Something to drink Cheerilee? May I call you Cheerilee?" Minuette busied herself gathering bowls and forks.

"You may, and the water I have here is fine." Cheerilee quietly took another sip, eyeing Minuette over the lip of the cup.

For a time, the only sounds were the soft clank of the clocks and the ting and scrape of china as Ditzy inhaled three bowls of salad. Minuette was forced to chop up a second head of lettuce just to have enough for herself and Berry when she finally came out.

"So...Miss Romana." Cheerilee began.

"Yes?" Called Minuete from beneath the counter, where she was putting away dishes that weren't being used.

"You moved to Ponyville from...Canterlot?"

Minuette stuck her head up. "Is...is my accent that obvious?"

"Oh no, It's just I hear it almost every week from the older sister of one of my students. She's worked very hard to cultivate one." Cheerilee took another sip.

"Yes, you mentioned you were a teacher. It must be very rewarding, helping all those children on the path to success, 'Fostering a thirst for knowledge and a questioning heart' as my father used to say." Minuette began sorting silverware into their proper drawers.

"It's a trying profession at times, but I love it, and I have very...enthusiastic students." Minuette did not see the vein on Cheerilee's neck distend momentarily.

"My daughter Dinky has Cheerilee for a teacher. She's encouraged Dinky to pursue her talent for painting. I hope that with Cheerilee's help, my little muffin will have her cutie mark soon." Ditzy said between bites of salad.

"Your daughter is indeed very adept Derpy, you should be proud. I only wish all my students were so accepting of their talents..." Cheerilee rested her chin on a hoof, venting a tired sigh.

"Some of your students can't acknowledge their gifts?" Minuette frowned from behind the counter.

"Without going into detail or naming names, since that would be quite improper, three of my students, dear friends to each other and wonderful little fillies besides have all had trouble with this." Cheerilee rubbed her forehead in exasperation.

"One is contending with the fact that her family has a long tradition of a certain profession, one for which I suspect she will have little or nothing to do with." Cheerilee ran a hoof over the end table speculatively. "I can't tell how much is pressure from her family and how much is self inflicted though."

"Another wants nothing more than to be closer to her sister, a pony who is very kind and especially generous with anypony, but remains aloof and distant, evidently even with close family. She has trouble expressing her feelings I think. And her little sister, rather than demanding the attention and validation of who she is herself, seeks to close the gap by imitating her elder sister as best she can. Often without much success."

Cheerilee accepted a refill of her water glass from a pitcher Minuette levitated over to her, taking a few sips before beginning again. "And the third, a classic case of juvenile hero worship for a frankly questionable role model." Cheerilee looked at Minuette. "What is it with kids today and being obsessed with looking cool or being hip? You can be the coolest pony in town and it won't get you into college." Cheerilee grumbled at the floor. "It certainly didn't get her into college..."

"All of them fundamentally made the same mistake. They all want to be someone else, or be something they're not for someone else." Cheerilee then waved a hoof in qualification. "Don't get me wrong, they're searching for their cutie marks with a broad brush too, it seems every week they've concocted some new disastrous experiment to find their special talent. I've had to put a stop to some of the more dangerous ones, but sometimes I worry..."

Minuette nodded in sympathy. Ditzy just nodded vigorously.

"And what were the circumstances of your move here, if I may ask? Not many ponies move from a place like the capital to Ponyville." Cheerilee took another swig.

Minuette winced slightly, she didn't really enjoy telling this story. "The short, blunt version is my business in Canterlot failed and I had to leave the city, seek opportunities elsewhere, where I wouldn't be outcompeted by the giant name-brand stores. I'm a carpenter by trade, a dying art some would say in this modern age of mass production."

Cheerilee tilted her glass in acknowledgement, requesting no more detail. "I'm sorry your arrival here was rooted in such a painful decision. Hopefully you'll find your time in Ponyville enjoyable."

Minuette brightened. "Well your sister has made me feel very welcome. Truly the best evening I've had in months."

Cheerilee's sympathetic smile became more awkward. "Yes...you'll excuse me if I'm a little bit surprised by...that. Given the circumstances."

Minuette swished her hair with a hoof. "Well, I'm told I can be quite charming when I want to be."

Hopefully I've made her uneasy enough that she won't ask me to go into detail about what exactly dinner entailed. I haven't had to bold-facedly lie to her yet, and I'd like to keep it that way.

Indeed, Cheerilee had taken the pause to strike up a conversation with Ditzy Doo, who seemed almost shocked that someone would want to address her at all, but nonetheless jumped in with gusto, extolling the virtues of education. Minuette wasn't really paying attention after about a minute, instead focusing on getting the food ready; but she caught the tail end of Ditzy's rather spirited exposition.

"...Why if we didn't have ponies like you Cheerilee, we wouldn't get any high school students, and by extension no college students, and by extension no researchers at places like Hoofington Nuclear Laboratory, and they wouldn't publish their monthly journal about particle physics!"

Ditzy flew over to take Cheerilee's hooves in her own. "You are directly responsible for making me the happiest mare in Ponyville every fifth of the month when I get my copy of Quarks, Quasars and Quantum Quandaries."

Ditzy's eyes were watering. "Thank you Cheerilee, from the bottom of my heart."

From the second floor a voice came. "Colgate? Can you come up here for a moment?"

Minuette put down the jug of water, taking a quick draught from her cup and wiping her mouth with a hoof. "Coming Berry!"

When Minuette walked back in to find Berry brushing her mane at the mirror, Minuette caught a whiff of her own shampoo.

"How is she?" Berry asked.

"Oh she's fine, very pleased to see me, her daughter Dinky is quite the artist evidently." Minuette grinned into the wet towel flung into her face.

"Ha ha. I meant my sister."

"Cheerilee is nice, very dedicated to her students. She seems to care about you a lot." Minuette rapped Berry on the back of the head. "And for the record, I do not enjoy playing the part like that."

Playing ha.

Berry stopped brushing. She looked away from Minuette's stern reflection behind her. "I'm sorry Colgate. I won't ask you to do something like that again."

After another moment she said, "Tell you what, if ever you need a favor from me, I'll do it, no questions asked, just like you did for me now."

"Berry, you don't need to set up a tab with me, I'm helping you because I want to."

Minuette englufed the brush with her magic and began tugging at the places Berry couldn't easily reach. Her floppy curls evidently became quite knotted if left to themselves.

"Got a spare toothbrush?"

Minuette pointed with a hoof. "Right drawer behind the Q-tips. I always keep several in case I drop mine or something."

Berry chuckled into her toothpaste. "Yeh sure deh hahe gerhs Colghae."

Minuette rolled her eyes and gave a particularly matted tangle on Berry's mane a yank.

"Eaugh!"

***

"Heya again Cheerilee!" Berry gave her sister a wink as she descended the stairs in front of Minuette.

"Heya yourself sleeping beauty." Cheerilee gave Berry a light punch on the arm in greeting. "I'm glad you had a good time last night but a note or something would have been appreciated so I wouldn't have been plagued by fear for your safety all morning. And sank half my medication for the month. Again."

Minuette trotted over with a Tupperware full of the last of the salad, Ditzy having gone back for fourths and fifths while Minuette had been upstairs.

"Here you go Berry, just something to tide you over during your shift. Don't worry, I've got dinner for myself all ready too. And you can return the box tomorrow or whenever you get the chance."

Berry took the Tupperware and situated it on her back. "Thanks a bunch Colgate! It looks delicious. This way I won't have to buy dinner from Horte."

With that, both Earth Ponies and the Pegasus headed out the door, Ditzy turning around on the way out to poke her head inside the vestibule again.

"Sorry I kinda emptied your fridge Miss Romana! I'll ask Harvest if we can have you over for lunch sometime!"
Before Minuette could say anything, Ditzy was off again, this time cartwheeling dangerously close to the property across the street before she achieved enough lift to carry her fully aloft. Minuette couldn't help but wonder if Ditzy ever accidentally crashed.

Oh! I bet I could borrow that Daring Do novel from Twilight after dinner! I still need to visit her after all. That's the ticket. After all this unpacking, curling up with a good book sounds amazing.

We are coming up on the end of the first part of the story now. There will be two, perhaps three more arcs of similar length to this. Told you that we were in for a long haul.

For the record, yes I do love all of the music genres just mentioned and yes, I'm doing that thing that the lovely and wonderful DawnFade does and throwing in some music on occasion.

Chapter 8 (Books)

Books

New Cast:

Twilight Sparkle

Rarity

Big Macintosh

Spike

About an hour and a shower later and Minuette was closing the front door (remembering the key this time) and ready to head out into the town once more. Afternoon was giving way to evening, with lamps flicking on as Minuette walked through the quiet streets. She was going without her dress this time, mostly because she had no other viable eveningwear, though in the interest of protecting her still sensitive eyes from the harsh glare of the setting sun, she had unearthed the wide brimmed yellow hat that went with last night's ensemble. As a standalone, it cut a pretty enough figure, and complimented her purse well. The letter from Melodia floated in an azure light half a meter from her face. Minuette was just about to begin reading, when a flash of pink caught her eye in the vicinity of her mostly dead rosebushes to the side of her property.

Only the barest squelch of anxiety took root in her stomach. "...Ruby? Desmond? Is that you?"

Leaving the letter floating next to her, Minuette prudently recalled a light spell from an introductory magic class in school, summoning a glowing orb of her characteristic cold blue light and nudging it toward the bushes with a thought. Presently a shape took form, and presently Minuette found herself wishing it was Ruby's unsettling pet, rather than-

...a Luna damned alligator in my rose bushes.

Minuette stared at the equally unblinking purple eyes of what appeared to be a roughly purse sized alligator. A slightly manic giggle slid from her lips, accompanied by some involuntary muscle movement.

First one out in town, now another on my property...I'm going to find a hydra in my closet in the morning. I'm calling it now. And I'm going to find out the hydra is actually a postal clerk here in Ponyville, using his numerous heads to sort mail with lightning speed, and all the ponies will look at me like I'm a fool for not understanding that hydras make excellent postal clerks.

The alligator yawned, as if it was taking no perverse pleasure in the damage its vacant and soulless stare was wreaking upon the Unicorn's mind. It also did not seem to have any teeth, now that Minuette had a view of its gullet.

Words formed. "You're...hehe...probably somepony's pet as well I'll bet. You want to sit in my landscaping? Go right ahead."

Minuette spun on her hoof and stepped outside her property, shutting the gate behind her. "If you are still here when I get back I'm levitating you into my closet until I find your owner. You can keep the mail hydra company."

Behind Minuette's receding form, a pink forehoof extended from inside her open kitchen window, questing, probing her bushes. The alligator snapped its jaws shut around it as it came close, and was yanked inside with a few errant twigs.
Now in the street and heading into town, Minuette brought the letter up again, Melodia's barely legible doctor's scrawl as ever a painful contrast to her clear and concise diction.

Dearest Minuette,

I know you will have probably barely settled in when this letter reaches you, but I didn’t want you to think me a terrible friend for not coming with Moondancer to see you on your final day in Canterlot. I wanted to come but we’ve been swamped with patients at work and my ward has been overflowing for days. You know how it gets towards the end of summer, some days I just end up sleeping on the floor in my office. It's even worse now that Doctor Summerwind has gone away on maternity leave.

Minuette could see that Melodia had paused here, the telltale cluster of dots in a tight circle a sign of her tapping the pen on paper in thought. Or perhaps shame, given what was written next.

As I write this however, my reasons sound hollow and pathetic to my inner ear, and my morals. All right, different tack.

I’m so sorry I wasn't there to say goodbye Colgate. I suppose I should have led with that.

It hurt so much knowing you were leaving, too much to see you as I knew you would have been. Tired, alone in the dark remains of a store you had lived in all the years I have known you. At the time I told myself, I have seen enough fear and pain and loss at work, I don't deserve to see my friends like that. My thoughts were focused on me when I should have been asking myself what you needed, what comfort you might take from my presence. It was selfish of me and you have every right to be angry.

I know at times I can be a little bit standoffish, and cold, and pedantic. But that doesn't mean I get to ignore my responsibilities as your friend. I hope that you can forgive me, and that we can continue to be friends.

With that said, I know Moondancer did a good job of dragging you out of your usual funk, and she tells me you were in much better spirits, and full of food, when she left. Do try to remember to eat? And drink? If you do not I will be forced to call the local medical center in Ponyville and tell them that you have an eating disorder. Don't even think I won't.

I understand she also managed to secure from you a certain promise. More important than remembering your bodily needs are the needs of your spirit Colgate. And yours is a spirit that needs companionship like none I’ve ever known. It’s imperative that you find someone, preferably several someones to help you through this difficult transition.

Now before you start grumbling don’t worry, Moondancer and I have taken steps to ensure that you comply with our directive. To that end you will find three tickets enclosed in this envelope. They are for box seats to the opening game of the University Hoofball Season. Your and Moondancer’s own Alma Mater, the Royal Knights, will be playing. (This was Moondancer’s idea, some days I feel like she never outgrew her sorority years.)

The game is not for a few weeks yet, but when it rolls around we expect to see you and our replacements here in Canterlot for the day. We know money is tight for you right now, so we’ll handle dinner afterwards as well. It’s that bistro on 7th and Rosemead you love so much. And before you protest, no, it is not too expensive, and yes, I will be more than happy to eat there. I’m quite certain I can find something vegan on their entire menu. So you cannot escape, you and your new friends are being treated to dinner by us and that is the end of it.

P.S. Moondancer assures me that sporting events like these are all the rage for the more provincial townsponies you live with now.

P.P.S. I think she might be biased though, Moondancer never misses a chance to see grunting and sweating stallions beat each other senseless for her amusement. Not your preference I know, though I suppose you could always admire the cheerleaders? Those uniforms seem to be getting smaller and smaller each year.

Much Love and Worry,

Melodia

Minuette tucked the letter back into the pocket of her saddlebags and adjusted her sunglasses, wincing as an errant beam of descending light penetrated the corner of her vision, making her eyes water and her headache flare. She gave a little sigh, then laughed again.

Melodia, you are ever the clinician. You've left me nothing to do but meekly agree and ride along, just like you've always done.

Minuette considered Melodia the closest thing she had to a best friend, at least in recent years. A Pegasi whose father had been a Wonderbolt, and mother an engineer, specifically an engineering failure analyst tapped by the royal court for every major project the princesses had mandated in the last decade, Melodia had a big legacy to live up to. In that area, she understood Minuette and her duty to uphold the family profession better than Moondancer ever could. And as head of Cognitive Development and Neurology at Canterlot Children's Hospital, Melodia had made her parents very proud.

Continues to make them proud...

Minuette quickly stamped out the momentary stab of envy at Melodia's good fortune to still have both parents. Rather than dissipate fully, it gave way to the creeping guilt she felt now whenever her guard was broken.

Father…grandfather...

She bundled the letter away.

I wasn’t upset with you Melodia; I was...-am-far too busy being furious with myself. I’ll write you back first thing tomorrow so you won’t have to sit with this for much longer.

The blue and grey Unicorn paused to consult a street sign, “Orchard Boulevard” appeared to lead out of Ponyville proper, across a stately little bridge that straddled a pond and off into the countryside to the west of town. Minuette thought she could make out some kind of farmhold surrounded by tree groves covering a hill in the distance. It was only when she unfocused her gaze and saw that the trees spread out across the entire range as far as she could see that the true size of what was now obviously some vast plantation made plain.

My word, I guess there must be some old money in Ponyville after all.

The squeak of cart wheels caught her attention as a truly enormous Earth Pony stallion crested the top of the bridge and began to make his way down its townward side, an equally enormous and overburdened cart of apples in tow.

A vivid fire engine red in coloration, with disheveled and sandy blonde mane, he cut a rugged but peaceable figure, massive yoke about his neck and strand of buckwheat protruding between his gums. Minuette stared, not so much in personal admiration but in appreciation for just how much Moondancer would be all over this ruggedly handsome country boy. The slight and peaceful smile, the bright and kind eyes, and a body that could only come from a lifetime of hard labor or chemical enhancement. Minuette silently whistled in spite of herself.

I wonder if he knows how to get to the library. He’s obviously a farmhand of some kind, probably not much of a reader, but Ponyville is small, he probably knows.

“Um…hello there!”

The stallion halted about ten meters from her, in the midst of turning left to head into the market area of town, probably to store his produce for sale tomorrow. Slowly he turned his head to face her, rotating the buckwheat in his mouth.

“Eeyup?”

Minuette stared hypnotically as the strand spun. “Eh-heh. Pardon me, are you from town?

“Eeyup.”

“Uh…would it be a bother if I asked you for some directions?”

“Ennope.”

I've got a real philosopher here. Hopefully his directions are not equally monosyllabic.

Minuette smiled. “Wonderful! I’m trying to find Ponyville Library, could you tell me the way?”

“Ya’ll goin’ t’visit Twilight?” The buckwheat bounced with each word.

Minuette opened her mouth and swiftly shut it. A whole sentence! “Yes! Yes I am, I’m an old acquaintance of hers from Canterlot and I wanted to do some catching up.”

“Good on ya, Twi’s had a long day, visit from an old friend’ll do ‘er good.”

“Oh. I had no idea, I was just going to catch up and maybe check out a book. Doesn’t she have some really good friends in town? I was told she was very happy here.”

Minuette hadn't considered this. The few letters Twilight had sent back to Canterlot were cheerful, pleasant. Minuette knew from half remembered experience that Twilight was not a good liar, in person or on paper, her half baked excuses to bow out of social events or even pony contact almost always ringing hollow. Never rude, never cruel, but distant and aloof as the Princess's favored student.

The stallion nodded, rattling the wagon chains. “Soma th’ best Ah reckon, not least ‘cause mah sister’s among 'em.”

He closed the gap between them, then raised a foreleg to connect with Minuette’s own. “Name’s Macintosh, Macintosh Apple.”

Minuette glanced at the cutie mark, a green apple half, and at the cart, laden with some delicious looking specimens of produce and could not help herself.

“How fitting. I’m Minuette Romana.” Mac’s grip, Minuette fancied, was heavily modulated for her safety. She could feel the power behind that placid exterior.

Her comment elicited only a flutter of eyelid from the enormous stallion, who let go to point with his foreleg.

"Left on Juniper and straight on 'till ya see th' hollowed out tree."

Minuette nodded thanks and made to leave, but halted at Macintosh's quiet, "Halfa moment miss?"

"Hmm?"

Macintosh produced a book from a bag nailed to the side of the applecart.

"Ya reckon ya'll could take this back fer me?"

Minuette glanced at the title as she levitated it out of his outstretched hoof and into her own bags.

"Fetlock Holmes? " Minuette kept most of the incredulity out of her voice.

"Ah like me a good mystery story." Macintosh smiled slightly. "What about you miss, you like books?"

The golden light of the setting sun reflected off the windows around them. "I have lately taken a liking to the Daring Do series." Minuette placed the book next to Melodia's letter.

Macintosh sighed. "Pegasus friend'a mine keeps buggin' me ta try that one. Guess I'll hafta now." With that, he shrugged the yoke higher on his shoulders and began to pull down the street once more. "Much obliged Miss Minuette."

Minuette trotted aside to let his payload through. "Thank you for the directions Mr. Macintosh!" She yelled at his receding form and got a return wave and a "Eeyup."

***

The only other event on the way to the library was that Minuette was nearly run down by three fillies on a scooter attached to a small red wagon laden with what appeared to be various pieces of lab equipment, barely secured by twine and blankets. As they careened around the turn at Juniper, Minuette was struck by an errant vial. A white and pink Unicorn filly momentarily ceased an evidently impromptu song about cutie marks and chemical engineering to yell a hasty apology back, and then the group was gone from Minuette's sight.

I have decided that Ruby's predilections for strange companions and activities are probably not as outside the norm as I had thought. Maybe it's something in the water....

Minuette looked down at the vial in the dirt. It was still intact. She shrugged and placed it within her purse as well.

At last Minuette found herself outside Ponyville library. It was indeed a hollowed out tree, kept alive by some magic no doubt. Windows seemed to almost grow from its trunk and its branches formed the frames of some of the upper ones. A protruding lamp hung from the second floor window, and illuminated the triangular wooden door in the gathering darkness. Minuette adjusted her hat, and brought a hoof up to rap the painted candle that adorned the door, but halted a few centimeters from the surface.

Wait a moment. This is Twilight Sparkle I'm visiting. The pony who gets uncomfortable with unannounced social calls from the word go. I need a plan to counter whatever excuse she'll formulate to see me on my way. What were her old standbys? Oh yes. So, if she needs to study, offer to help quiz her on the material. If she is organizing the library, I'm a Unicorn, so I can speed that up quite a bit. Let's see...and if she is testing out new spells I could- Minuette swallowed apprehensively -I could offer myself as a...test subject.

It wasn't so unreasonable to think that between all that and the desire to check out a book herself and return one for Macintosh that Minuette could at least glean a half hour of perfunctory visitation out of Twilight.

Minuette now allowed her hoof to rap twice politely upon the door then quickly straightened her mane and settled the purse around her neck.

The door opened, engulfed in a light blue magic and Minuette began:

"Twilight, it's so good to see you...you..."

The pony in the doorway was not Twilight. Pearlescent white in coat, deep and luxurious royal purple mane, piercing arctic blue eyes, manicured eyebrow arched in questioning. The pony from cafe Celeste last night.

Breath of creation, she's so much better up close.

Minuette's eyes became wide. "You...you..."

Her perfect brows came together in worry. Then a sonorous alto voice said, "Darling are you all right? There isn't anything on my face is there?"

Minuette's brain re-established contact with her jaw muscles and deftly closed them before she began drooling. She hoped. "Wh-what? Oh! No! No there is nothing wrong with your face."

Rarity. That's what Berry said her name was. The stuffiest pony in all of Equestria she had said.

More primordial areas of Minuette's mind were exploring just what kind of stuffing Rarity might do with Minuette-

NO. Bad brain.

A slight smile tugged at the corners of Rarity's mouth. "Now you flatter me darling, I'm certain that there is something I've overlooked." She gave her mane a swish and sighed. "I'm hopeless like that."

Rarity produced a hoof. "But where are my manners? I am Rarity, and yes, you do have the right address. Twilight is just a bit indisposed at the moment miss...?"

Minuette grabbed the hoof gingerly, feeling like a gawking schoolgirl. "M-Minuette. Minuette Romana. I'm an old acquaintance of Twilight's from Canterlot-"

Rarity's eyes sparkled in recognition. "Canterlot! Oh, we must talk! Not later but soon! Very soon!" Rarity seemed about to launch into some exposition, but caught herself, and quickly smoothed out her mane. After a few moments she began again, more calmly.

"It's been months since I had anyone from the capital to gossip with, it's always been my dream to create for the nobility there. I'm a designer you see, mostly dresses and other ensembles but I can create almost anything I put my mind to. Er...If I do say so myself."

Including giant spiders. Well, with some help from Princess Luna.

Rarity turned back into the library. "Twilight dear, you have another visitor! It's your friend Minuette come down from Canterlot!"

From inside a half remembered voice exclaimed in surprise. "Minuette?! Ohmygosh did I get a letter and misplace it?! Oh I knew this new filing system was crap!"

From beyond the doorway manila folders and spreadsheets began to fly past and into the hall. Minuette and Rarity both winced as entire filing cabinets were levitated into the air and dropped with a crashing thud in the main room.

"Uh...Twilight?" Minuette began.

Between crashes: "Spike?!" *BAM* "SPIIIKE?!" *WHAM* "Spike! Where does incoming post from outside town end up in?!"

The dragon in question was bounding down the stairs now, rubbing sleep from his eyes and endeavoring not to trip on the discarded paperwork strewn about. "Twilight! What the hay is going on down here-"

He turned to see both Minuette and Rarity wave at him in greeting, wearing slightly painful smiles as papers continued to swirl around them like confetti.

"Minuette?!"

"Hey Spike. Pardon me for a moment." Minuette took a deep breath and barreled deeper into the swirling maelstrom of office supplies, momentarily admiring the display of magical prowess she was witnessing.

And here I thought I was adept since I can concentrate on three objects simultaneously. Twilight has gotten truly exceptional in her time here.

In the heart of the tornado was the purple Unicorn herself, eyes glowing with eldritch power, frantically skimming files and muttering unintelligibly.

Minuette bravely rapped her on the shoulder. "Twilight?"

More muttering.

"Twilight I didn't send a letter. I just...kind of decided to visit. Spontaneously."

Materials fell all around them, the violet glow of Twilight's magic gone in an instant.

"Oh! Yes, that would be the other logical explanation wouldn't it?" Twilight rubbed the back of her head, eyeing the mess she had made with some consternation. Errant papers came to rest on furniture and lampshades. A large wooden bust of a Windigo on the central table was now wearing a recent copy of Equestrian Geographic. Minuette was amused to note that Twilight still reverted to her old awkward smile when she was uncomfortable. Some things evidently never change. "Soooo...How are you Minuette? How are Moondancer and Melodia?"

Spike's ears perked up at this. "Oh yeah! How is Moondancer Minuette?" A folder had come to rest on his head, looking vaguely like a paper pirate hat.

Minuette smiled and gave the little dragon a pat on the head, pulling the folder off and handing it to him. "I'm doing all right, and she's fine Spike, she sends her love as always."

I doubt Moondancer would object to me saying that. She always did find his clumsily proffered affections adorable.

His cheeks began to flush with color. "Hee-"

Rarity trotted up a bopped spike in the back playfully, winking at Minuette. "Spikey Wikey...who is this Moondancer, do you have a girl in every port darling?"

Abject terror flashed across his face. "N-no Rarity! I mean we were friends before me and Twilight moved here but I don't, we weren't-tell her Minuette!" His eyes had gone wide as saucers, he could not see Rarity stifling a giggle behind him.

"What? Oh yes." Minuette said with deep seriousness. "She was mostly just a friend of Twilight's from Canterlot."

Rarity sighed theatrically. "Oh well if that's all, then I suppose I don't have to be jealous and worry about having to share you with anypony else."

The ivory Unicorn turned back to Twilight, who was eyeing this exchange with some dubiousness. "Twilight dear I think it's best if I head off, Pinkie said she needed me for party preparations urgently once she got off shift, and you have a guest to entertain." She gave a little bow in Minuette's direction. "Miss Minuette I bid you good evening."

Minuette wanted very much to be on more informal terms with Rarity. Oh yes. "Uh, call me Colgate please, all my friends do..."

Rarity stared blankly for a moment, then: "Oh yes I see, the mane and coat; oh how delightfully gauche." Rarity giggled to herself as she shut the door and Minuette felt the bottom drop out of her stomach in embarrassment.

Just because Berry tells you in a drunken stupor that your nickname is fitting doesn't mean it isn't stupid as hell to everypony else.

Belatedly Twilight came over, ears up in questioning. "So Minuette, what made you decide to visit? N-not that I'm unhappy to see you! Far from it. I just-well...we haven't talked in a long time."

Minuette sat down on one of the high cushions and pondered into a hoof. "It has been almost two years since our last letters hasn't it."

The ears drooped and Twilight looked away. "I know, I let the separation from Canterlot ruin our friendship. I just got so caught up in all the wonderful things happening to me here that I...I forgot about those times we had shared back in the capital."

Minuette smiled sadly. "We were upset with you for a time it's true. But Twilight, we could hardly call ourselves your friends. If you have found happiness here then that is what Moondancer, Melodia and I would wish most for you, no matter what."

Minuette took Twilight's hoof in hers. Spike very pointedly began cleaning in the other room. "You belong here...and now I do too."

Twilight jerked up. "What?!"

Minuette grimly continued, finding the tale a little less painful to recount with each telling.

Maybe someday it won't hurt at all.

...Fat chance.

"I had to shut down my store in Canterlot. I went out of business, to put it bluntly. I salvaged enough from the sale of the store and part of my own works to set myself up here in Ponyville, for the moment anyway." Minuette added more warmly: "I've met some nice ponies already. Interesting...but nice."

Twilight smiled. "You think half the ponies in town are off their nut don't you?"

Minuette gasped. "T-telepathy?"

She waved a hasty hoof of dismissal. "No! Nono-It's just I felt, well feel, the exact same way." Twilight rolled her eyes. "Especially when I first came to town."

Minuette giggled. "I was attacked by Desmond on my first outing into town!"

Twilight brought her hooves to her face. "Ruby Pinch's pet spider? Oh Celestia he must have scared you half to death!"

"I about had a heart attack it's true." Minuette agreed.

"When I first came to town, I was forced to eat about twenty apple themed desserts by my friend Applejack's family. Then I got rained on, then Rarity tried about a dozen outfits on me and-oh it was madness!"

Twilight stared for a moment. "Well, and then there was that whole thing with Nightmare Moon. But it was during that horrible time, when I was so scared and I wasn't sure if we were going to make it, wasn't sure if I could succeed, that my new friends-" Twilight held a hoof to her chest and sighed "-my friends showed me that I wasn't alone; that together we could accomplish anything."

The violet Unicorn took Minuette's hoof, just as she had done moments before. “And more than anything else, that's what Ponyville is to me. The place where I learned that friendship is the most magical, most powerful thing in the world. No matter what has happened to bring you here, this place, these ponies will help see you through it. That I can promise." She gave Minuette's hoof a firm shake, for emphasis.

Minuette felt water in her eyes. "Th-thank you Twilight..."

“So, now that you’re here, is there anything I can do for you?”

Minuette reached into her purse. “Macintosh Apple wanted me to return this for him.” She floated over the Holmes mystery. “And…I was wondering if you had a particular Daring Do novel.”

Twilight nodded thanks. “Assuming Rainbow hasn’t got it, yeah I definitely do.” She tapped a hoof to her chest with pride. “I own the whole series you see."

"Oh excellent!" Minuette smiled, then had a thought. "Twilight...do Hydras make good mail clerks?"

Author's Note

I want to apologize to everyone who has read the story so far, I had no intention of taking so long an absence from this. All I can offer by way of recompense is the assurance that new chapters will be arriving regularly again. (What a pack of lies that was. Right, well I'm working on this again.)