Dogfight Squadron

"War is God's way of teaching Americans geography."

                                   -Ambrose Bierce

      Chrysalis paced in front of her generals in the changeling hive. "I am not here to fight you. On the contrary, I'm here to help you."

      "My queen we cannot expect to win against those juggernauts!"

      "Then we shall make our own." She turned to Wasp, a top gun flyer and her favorite squadron commander. "Is there anything you need, I will give it to you. Just say what you want."

       A pause. "Give me a squadron of Rattlers."

       Chrysalis gave him a hard look, then turned away from him.

                                              ------------------------------------------

       It was a cheerful and cloudless day. Jeff and I had taken a day off from training for the nuclear bomb, and I had loaded standard air to air and air to ground missiles, plus the massive cannon on the front was completed filled with depleted uranium rounds.

       Celestia had been generous with the materials, allowing me to break into her most secretive of storage hangars. Creating shielding for the aircraft, they were soon practically invincible.

       Radar was probably the most important thing. It helped us monitor what the changelings were doing. On this day, radar detected a massive changeling formation heading in our direction.

We weren't alerted.

       In a massive wave of flying pony bugs and green "phasers," the small squadron of Rattlers were mostly destroyed. Jeff and I ran to our Rattler, and I began to taxi to the runway. It was the fastest I had ever gone through the startup checklist.

      On the runway, I pressed the VTOL button, and the wings along with the engines flipped up. Pushing the throttle up, the blue jet rose into the sky, Jeff shooting the rear guns the entire time.

      Another Rattler came up behind us.

      "Achtung, Spitfeur!" Jeff yelled.

     At first, I was confused, then I realized Spitfire and Soarin were crewing them. They came on my left wing, wiggled their wings, then dove away, cutting through the changeling swarm. Our small numbers probably saved us; the changelings probably got in each other's way a lot.

    Firing missiles left and right, and pulling the trigger for the gun whenever some poor changeling bastard came through my line of fire, we fought back at the invaders. But more and more poured into the battle. Two shielded Rattlers weren't going to make a difference.

    Several got on our tails, and stuck in us like superglue.

    "Spit, let's play chicken with these assholes. Break left when I tell you!"

    We flew at each other, but the row of hangars blocked our view.

     "Break, break!"

     We barely missed each other, but the bugs weren't so lucky. Several slammed into each other, with a final one still on Spit's tail.

      She knife edged between two hangars, barely missing the concrete. Jinxing between watchtowers, like the red bull races, the changeling lost his/her bearings and and smashed into one.

       Spitfire, who lost plenty of airspeed, tried to go VTOL, but she didn't have the time. Rattler rocking left and right, she pancaked into the ground in a shower of dirt. The two Pegasi got out, then the plane blew up.

      I knew it was over. The overwhelming numbers were just going to smash us.

      Or so I thought.

      Tomcats screamed in, and they drove back the offenders. A typical "oh, I'm going to die, woe on me-oh wait, Prince Hero is here, we're saved, praise the lord!" sort of thing.

      Making short work of the remaining stragglers, they turned back to their home bases, leaving Jeff and I to land back at the decimated airdrome.

      Climbing out of the overworked craft, I looked around. Everywhere, gray smoke rose into the sky. Everything was destroyed, save our still pristine Rattler.

      Luna teleported in front of us. "Your presence is requested in Canterlot."

      Grabbing us, she teleported us to the throne room.

       Everyone was there; the Elements, top military commanders, The newly weds, and of course, Celestia.

       "Oh, thank goodness you're here. We're were all worked sick."

       I nodded. "Okay, so here's the plan. We regroup, rearm, refuel, and assault the hive."

       Everyone looked at each other, mostly surprise.

       "Now!"

       They scrambled into action, handing out orders and etc. "Luna."

       "Yes?"

       "Make this a volunteer mission. Those who don't want to go, keep them back."

       "Then we're coming with you." Celestia said as she walked over. "I can't let the last two of a species on this planet just go face danger alone."

        "Ready up, then. Meet you lot in half an hour. Luna, if you please?"

        "Of course." She teleported us back to our Rattler.

        I looked at Spitfire. "Disband the 617th."

       She nodded, and turned, shouting orders to the nearby ponies to set up the nuke.

       I turned and shook hands with my younger cousin.

      "It was an honor, Jeff."

      "As was for you, my friend."

      We shook hands, and climbed into our refueld and rearmed jet, ready for the one way trip.

      Everyone alive at the academy waved us off. Taking off into the sunset, I guess we did make a good show of jet exhaust. We knew this was probably a suicide mission, but we didn't care. We got a death that went off with a bang.

     "Guess this is really goodbye to everyone back on Earth." Jeff sighed.

     "At least those news reporters can finally get something right."

      We shook hands, exchanged some pictures and things close to our heart in case one of us didn't make it, and climbed into the attack aircraft. Several ponies came over and spray painted "Milestone" on the side of the nose as a pet name for the aircraft.

      The Rattler lifted off the ground, and the two Princesses formed up on us. Celestia in glinting golden armor, Luna wearing a simple cloak.

       Most of the flight was quiet, dull, and stressful. Jeff took out his iPod and began to play elevator music.

       After several hours, we reached the Badlands. The Hive, as it turned out, was underground.

       "Um, Princess, we have a small issue."

        Celestia took out a small radio set I had given her.

        "Yes, go on?"

        "The bomb isn't guided."

        "Solutions?"

       "BANZAI!" I rolled the Rattler over onto it's back, then dove straight down.

        The two of us zoomed out of the end into a massive cavern, and I pulled us out, hugging the roof.

         "Ready when you are, cuz!"

         "All clear!"

          Jeff looked into the aiming scope, then released the bomb.

         "Get us out, now!"

          "I need a cave!"

          I yanked the stick up into a different cave, and began to climb out of the doomed city.

          The bomb blew, and the explosion began to rush out at us. We just weren't as lucky as the Millennium Falcon and her crew. The shock wave hit us, sending the Rattler tumbling into a salactite

           Our right wing gone, we began to roll uncontrollably, and the explosion sent us flying out of the opening. I saw Jeff eject, but when I tried to open my canopy, it wouldn't budge.

           I slammed my fist against the glass. "Open, you little piece of scheiße!"

           The Rattler reached it's apex, then began to fall back into the ground. "Jo, get out! Get out!"

           "I can't!"

            "Use your pistol!"

             "Oh, right!" I took out the Colt .45 and shot the glass a couple times. Then, I pulled the ejection lever. Two seconds later, the Rattler hit the ground and blew up.

***

             The hospital us a pretty common place for a person to wake up in after you've been though a lot of crap, like nuking an underground city.

             As I woke up, I noticed I was in a full body cast.

             Celestia gave me an amused smile. "I could have teleported the bomb in, you know."

             I let my head collapse into the pillow, and shook my head.