For the Love of a Nightmare
“Dear sister, wake up. You’re better now, and you’re free again.”
Luna took a deep breath and opened her eyes. So much was gloom around her, yet as she blinked a few times, her eyes finally adjusted to the pale moonlight of the strange chamber.
‘But am I Luna? Am I not Nightmare Moon? I do not understand…. Everything has been so strange to understand lately. All I know is I hurt so very much…’ Luna closed her eyes, feeling hot tears stinging them.
“There, there, sister. I promise, there’s no need to cry anymore. I’m here, and I’ll always be here for you.”
Luna’s eyes flew open at the feeling of a familiar warm hoof coming to touch her shoulder, and she looked up to see the kind, smiling face of Celestia looking down upon her.
Luna felt her tears fall in her misery. “I’ve been so alone, sister. I’ve been so alone…and I do not even know who I am anymore. Let me see myself, please—let me see if I am me or if I am the nightmare. I must know.”
Celestia sighed but stepped back and nodded. Then she used her magic to create a mirror.
Luna gasped at the sight before her. Her coat was pure black, her cutie mark a sinister purple, and her eyes terrified her with their sharpness and cold glow… Her wings were like those of a bat almost, her teeth were like razors…and her was horn sharpened for destruction or worse…
Luna flinched and tried to look away but just couldn’t. “Oh Celestia, I’m a monster now, a monster forever. Who will ever love me now?”
Instantly the mirror moved back, and Celestia stepped forward again. She looked down at her poor sister, her gaze firm, her tone sincere. “Everyone will love you, Luna, and I will love you. Oh, Luna, don’t you see, it doesn’t matter what you’ve done, the mistakes you’ve made, these things you think have ruined your life or legacy. You are who you choose to be in this moment and in the future. If you are Luna on the inside—loving, caring, beautiful Luna—then you are truly Luna no matter how you may appear. The nightmare is gone as long as you choose for it to be gone. It may take a while before it disappears entirely, but you are in control, Luna. You can do this. I have such faith in you.” Celestia smiled, leaning close. “Be brave, little sister. And be happy with me and all of our subjects again.”
Tears still rolled down Luna’s dark face. “But our subjects have always hated me…”
“No.” Celestia shook her head. “That is not true. Yes, they may have overlooked your hard work and beautiful nights more than was fair, but they do not hate you and never have. That belief is something twisted put there by the nightmare. Remember how it really was, Luna, not how Nightmare Moon needed you to believe it to be so that the dark magic could take hold of you. Remember, Luna, that you belong here with us always. You are our friend. And you are loved. You will return.”
Luna came forward with sobs as Celestia wrapped a foreleg around her in a hug. “Oh big sister, I’m so tired and so cold and so lonely. Don’t leave me ever again. Yes, I am Luna. I am Luna, and nothing shall ever change that! I am Luna, I have happiness and love, and I remember…”
And as Luna said these words, she opened her eyes among her tears only to glance past Celestia to the mirror still floating behind them. She watched as suddenly the darkness around her began to crack and melt away, revealing her own true features. Luna gasped in wonder.
“Ah!”
And, awake now on the moon, Nightmare Moon gasped in rage.
The dark mare sat up in her bed of moon dust and fog, breathing heavily, her dark pupils thin slits among the eerie green of her irises. Instantly, she used her magic to make a mirror appear before her…and then let out a deep breath as she saw her normal, warrior-like, grim countenance staring back at her.
“Yes, I thought not.” She smirked, admiring her reflection more. “Stupid dream. Or should I say nightmare…” Her gaze drifted down to the shadowy Nyx still standing around the pots of dream brew beneath her castle, and her eyes narrowed. “It must have been a fluke. None of them would dare tamper with my sleeping thoughts, not after my displays of power. Still though…” Nightmare Moon stood, making the mirror disappear, and descended her palace steps to approach the Nyx.
None of the moon creatures reacted to her approach. They merely continued chanting and mixing their brews for nightmares.
Nightmare Moon paused among them, raising her head in a stately way. “The nightmares are going well tonight, I presume.”
The ghostly Nyx all nodded their heads.
“Yes,” replied Gaiman. “But we can only make so many—perfect nightmares are even more of a delicate art than perfectly good dreams. At best we must settle for a mixture of both—dreams that have both bad and good qualities. Not the best dreams, but not the worst.”
“Grr…” Nightmare moon gritted her fangs. “At least tell me you can get me into some of those mediocre dreams—maybe I can darken them up a bit myself.”
The Nyx all looked to each other. Then Gaiman spoke up again. “Only on one night will we be able to manage that, mistress: the holiday of the moon when this sphere is aligned properly against the earth and sun—Nightmare Night. But otherwise, we can only give you our own best efforts to negatively influence the ponies dreams.”
Nightmare Moon huffed again but finally nodded. “Very well. I’ll accept what I can get for now, I suppose, and we can work from there to improve our powers over the ponies as time goes on. But speaking of influencing ponies’ dreams…” she leaned down, glaring at all of the Nyx, “No one would dare influence my dreams…would they?”
The Nyx all blinked and instantly shook their heads.
“No, of course not, mistress!”
“We would never!”
“We don’t even know your true name—we would have to know that to even begin specifically entering your dreams.”
Nightmare Moon raised her head and considered. Then she gave a single nod. “Very well. I will concede, you don’t know my truest name. But…” the glare returned, “If I ever find out any of you are trying to influence my own dreams, you’ll wish I had gotten rid of you instead of keeping you around to do my dirty work. Make no mistake about that.” She made her horn glow with the dark fire of her magic.
The Nyx all cringed and nodded.
“Yes, yes, mistress.”
“We shall faithfully serve you, we promise.”
“We would never dare challenge you.”
Nightmare Moon grinned. “Excellent. And let’s keep it that way, shall we?” She gave a slight yawn. “Now, I’m going back to sleep. Attempting to fill the hearts of the world with anger and spread eternal darkness takes a lot out of a girl. And besides, I want to be as well-rested and cared for as possible for when I do return to Equestria one day and overthrow that sickeningly sweet sun princess.” Her eyes narrowed as she turned away from the Nyx, mumbling to herself. “You are never gaining back control of this body, silly Luna of the past. You don’t get it yet…we’re the same now. I’m the worst parts of you given perfect form. I’m who you chose to grow up into.” She closed her eyes sighing deeply. “Celestia disagrees…yes, I know that.” Her eyes opened, her irises narrowing completely. “But whatever’s left of who I used to be can’t fight me. The rage and hate and the nightmare won a long time ago. There’s no hope for going back to the way things were, not ever. Luna is no more…Nightmare Moon reigns eternal.”
Nightmare Moon let out a deep sigh and gave a nod of her head. She was about to head back to her resting place but then blinked as she noticed the Nyx eyeing her strangely. She scowled, baring her fangs. “What?”
The Nyx all shuddered and then instantly went right back to busying themselves with their nightmare making.
A wave of anger rippled over Nightmare Moon, but she just sighed and proceeded up the stairs of her shadow palace. Her voice resumed its usual low and cool tone. “A ‘nightmare’ like I had must be a fluke, probably brought on by my dream confrontation with Celestia. She says I don’t know love? Well…she doesn’t know hate. But she will when I’m done with her.” A small smile curled at Nightmare Moon’s lip as she settled back into her bed, looking out over the white expanses of the moon and the Nyx down below completing their nightmare tasks. “I’ll torture her subjects, mock her by corrupting her sister’s legacy in their minds, and put her through so much pain that she’ll have to hate me one day…and as I feed off of that hatred, I really will finally conquer her, sunlight and all.” And with that thought and a dark chuckle, Nightmare Moon laid her head down to sleep again.
Far below her, the Nyx continued to fulfill her dark bidding for the night…which actually consisted of them creating enough of a nightmare-ish presence scattered throughout dreams to keep their dark mistress happy without actually having to spread enough dark and unhappy nightly visions to hurt and corrupt the ponies as Nightmare moon had done to the Nyx themselves.
Doran, however, stood apart a little and whispered very softly to herself. “Celestia.” A sliver in one of the cauldrons glowed golden. Doran poured a drop of potion into it and whispered underneath her breath. “Never fear, my charge and faithful friend. You gave me the truth of Nightmare Moon’s identity, and her true name—your sister, Luna. So now I may allow ‘nightmares’ to come to her dreams. And now I give you a sample of her most recent dream to show that underneath the darkness there is hope. Everything will be better one day, princess, I know it. But I’m sorry we’ve let you down for now.” Doran poured another drop of potion into the brew. The cauldron glowed brightly for a moment (thankfully, Nightmare Moon had fallen back asleep and so could not see the light), and then returned to its previous swirling black and greyish hue. Doran sighed and went back to the same tasks as the others. “I hope it gives her some comfort, seeing that.” Doran’s head hung low as she resumed her servitude to the dark Nightmare Moon, and the night continued on.
In Canterlot…
“Ah!” Celestia sat up with a gasp in the dimness of her chamber, her eyes wide. She took a moment to catch her breath and then glanced around, taking in her familiar, safe surroundings…and particularly the sight of the large window across from her with the light of the full moon shining down through it.
Celestia had taken this room in this new castle as her sleeping quarters ever since Luna’s departure. It had just been too awful even attempting to stay in the Everfree Forest castle, let alone in the large master bedroom of that castle which she had formerly shared with her sister. And besides, she wanted a room that would always let her…and make her…look at the moon. She knew the dark magic Luna had stumbled into took most of the blame for her corruption and loss, but still…
Celestia sighed, frowning, her eyes growing heavy at the feeling of tears behind them. “I know I could have done more for you, Luna, before it was too late. I could have helped you be happy. I’m so sorry, my sister.” Celestia remained in quiet contemplation for a moment, but then suddenly she gasped again, her horn glowing with a faint gold light coming from above…from the direction of the moonlight.
Instantly, the memory of the dream she had just experienced returned to her—Luna as Nightmare Moon, crying and letting Celestia comfort her until the nightmare had finally cracked and slipped away—and Celestia realized who had given her the dream and what it meant. Celestia blinked a few times, light tears streaming down her face, though she smiled now as they fell. “Oh thank you, thank you so much, my dear old dream friend,” she whispered into the darkness. “There is hope, and you’re finding ways to give it to her. Please continue to look after my sister…please keep her strong and okay no matter how lost she is for now. She’ll need all of her will and hope and love when the time comes so that she can be free.” Celestia’s smile grew and she wiped the tears away.
The sun princess looked to the moon again—the moon she now raised and lowered, though each morning and evening that she did so broke her heart a little. And she had no idea how she was going to handle the summer solstice next year—part of her just wanted to lock herself way during it, though she knew she would absolutely have to perform her task of starting the longest day of the year for her subjects in person and probably in as grand a display as possible to put their minds at ease after this year’s tragedy.
Celestia sighed, resting her head back onto her pillows in the moonlight. “It’ll be all right. As long as my subjects are happy, I can’t help but be a little happy too. And my hope and love for you, dear Luna, the hope and love I know you need, will sustain me until we can be together again. And so will our wonderful memories and my faith in our bright future.” Celestia closed her eyes. “Rest well, little sister. And thank you, Doran…thank all of you for your help, my friends. I’m sorry this burden has been put upon you, but one day you will be free again too. I promise. I love you all, and so do the ponies for everything you’ve done for them and everything you will do.” Celestia sighed. “You rest well too, Nightmare Moon. With all of your hatred and anger and selfishness…you probably need more rest than any of us. Whatever you are, you’re not my sister, but I hope you find peace too one day just the same.” Another tear came to Celestia’s closed eye, though she brushed it away.
Celestia’s horn glowed golden again for a moment in the moonlight, and she smiled once more. Sleep soon overtook her, and better dreams came to her (and to the ponies) than Nightmare Moon would have hoped.
As the years passed, though the Nyx could not influence Nightmare Moon’s dreams every night for fear of rousing her suspicions, they continued to inflect the occasional bit of love upon her slumbering thoughts as often as they could. And though, for the most part, Nightmare Moon ruled with an iron hoof and a heartless will, those rare dreams of love did bother her—they were her own personal ‘nightmares’. And she did fight with herself sometimes because of the confusion they brought, and sometimes the Nyx could hear her… Usually, she would dream these conversations, but sometimes she would continue her fights even in waking, occasionally even roaming around and mumbling to herself. And though her strange ‘conversations’ frightened the Nyx most severely (so severely, in fact, that Doran would only send Celestia dreams of the gist of such rebellious talk by Nightmare Moon and never the full details of her sudden ravings), these strange periods their mistress could go through gave them hope as well. And so the little creatures of the moon waited, and waited, and waited…as slowly a thousand years, so many moons, sped by…and the princess of the night’s darkness grew but quivered under its own impossible weight, especially each time the moon shone full with its light down upon the world….
Year 53 of the banishment…
Nightmare Moon stood in the shadows, the moon otherwise all-aglow around her. One of those ‘nightmares’ of hers had just ended, or at least Nightmare Moon felt certain enough that the nightmare had ended. But she often couldn’t tell until the talking had finished, and her whispers had faded leaving behind her usual heartless tone.
The dark pupils of her eyes narrowed like slits during the harsher whispers of her fights with herself, and widened almost to normal pony size during the softer whispers…
“Stop getting in my way, foolish mare! Stop being in my head. You can’t be there! You don’t exist anymore! Luna is gone!” She shook her head.
But then she sighed. “What if this is a bad dream, just a bad dream…”
“NO! It’s the nightmare.” She stomped her hoof into the moon dust. “The day is done, and now the nightmare begins! Where are you!? I…but…but no, you’re nowhere, of course, nowhere. I know you’re nowhere.”
“Celestia wouldn’t send her sister nowhere though...” A frown pulled at the corner of her mouth.
“Rrr…CELESTIA IS A FOOL!” she raged! “And she took everything from me! She led the subjects against me, against the night, against the moon. Beloved Celestia—oh, beloved Celestia, this is all your fault! You must have scarred me in our dream battle somehow all those years ago to cause these nightmares that plague me! Stop mocking me in Luna’s voice!”
“I’m so tired…” She sighed very deeply.
“Enough…enough…” Nightmare Moon’s usual cool tone returned now, and her eyes resumed their normal eeriness after a few blinks. She raised her head. “I will not let her win. It must be Celestia who somehow tortures me like this in my sleep in revenge for Luna’s fall. Oh Celestia, you fool…Luna fell to becoming me for her hatred, and I am bound to that pony I was through that hatred. You cannot control that!” She stalked away and suddenly cried out, looking down from her palace into the darkness and glowing shadows, “Nyx! More nightmares! More, more! Make the ponies feel your pain and mine!”
“Yes mistress, yes!” all of the Nyx called back up to her, and the speed of their movements at their dream cauldrons increased…even if, through their careful efforts and what remained of their love, there weren’t too many extra nightmares that night to speak of.
Year 301 of banishment…
Nightmare Moon stood alone on the edge of a plain of glowing white light just near her palace. The glowing whiteness spread everywhere when the moon was full…but she did not like it. Not that it caused any harm to her small dark kingdom, and in fact more nightmares could come as the moon was fuller over Equestria. But still…she could not control the light and technically it was a light that came from the influence of Celestia’s sun, and so Nightmare Moon stayed out of it as much as possible.
She had just woken up from one of her ‘nightmares’, and she frowned, her brow furrowing. “Celestia—always so perfect…. As Luna I was her sister—was I never really just as perfect?”
A large growl suddenly escaped her, and her eyes narrowed! “BUT I’VE BEEN PERFECTED NOW!!! No longer the diminutive of the sun but rather the fulfillment of the night! There is nothing wrong, there is nothing lacking! I am beautiful and powerful…”
Yet something flinched and she sighed deeply, her eyes falling away from the light. “I still remember my resistance right before the final moment of the transformation when I realized how far I’d gone to achieve my perfection. Memories, stop plaguing me!”
Her breaths quickened…and then a dark smirk came to her features, a wicked chuckle escaping her. “Hmm, yes, that’s right, my delicious wrath that changed me—that is at least one memory I don’t mind recalling. I can’t escape it—it was my wrath as Luna that gave me all of this power. And now there’s no escape from what I’ve become! Everyone really does hate the Princess of the Night now, so the nightmare is all there is left for me! Everyone hates Luna!”
“But Celestia does not hate Luna.” The words were out of her mouth before she even knew she was saying them.
She gasped again and drove her hoof into the dust. “BUT I HATE HER, and I will make her hate Nightmare Moon and the memory of Luna too, just wait, just wait…oh just wait, Celestia, I’m coming!” She laughed wickedly. “Ha, ha! Yes, Celestia’s rage! My own rage…Luna’s rage? Perhaps this strange moonscape cannot help but remind me of the past and Luna…but now and forever my power is already complete! I speak for the princess of the night now! And our legacy is one and of eternal darkness!”
She thrilled in this truth for a moment…but then blinked several times, something about that glowing, ever-extending whiteness before her unsettling her. “But what if the nightmare can be broken somehow? Celestia seemed to know something…. The elements. One thousand years…. Perhaps she truly had a plan with choosing to banish me for only one thousand years.”
“No, no, I was too powerful, and she just couldn’t do any better than temporary banishment! That is all!” She shook her head to herself. “She’s waiting, she knows Nightmare Moon is coming back, and she fears it deep down. Because once my exile ends, all she will be able do to save her dear subjects is to destroy the final remains of her own sister…and she is too weak to do it.”
“Still…” Her eyes narrowed and went downward. “She loves Luna, and her memory is so engrained in Celestia’s heart…. Somehow Celestia knows this isn’t the end for her.”
“But NO! No, there’s no HER and no ME! There’s no Luna and Nightmare Moon!” She bared her teeth, eyes flashing. “We…I…all are one, Luna is a memory, Luna…. But then why do I feel her so strongly, why do I see something about her in the moon’s glow, like she’s here somewhere, deep within the moonlight and always in my dreams, echoing and mocking me? It really is you, isn’t it, causing my nightmare?! Some ghost, or perhaps Celestia herself with her memories! Back, you’ve lost! I reign! All hail Nightmare Moon, I win, I win!!!”
“Mistress…Mistress…”
With a gasp, Nightmare Moon’s eyes returned to their normal state again, and her normal cool tone returned. She could hear the Nyx, and glanced back toward palace to see them looking to her. “Away!” she cried out in her surprise and rage. “Make nightmares and leave me be, or I’ll destroy you all like the puffs of smoke that you are!”
The Nyx cringed. “We only wish to depart now,” Gaiman called to her. “The nightmares for the night are over.”
Nightmare Moon gritted her fangs and let out a sigh. “Get away then. All of you—AWAY!” she boomed. “Leave me in peace!” And then she galloped out of sight into the shadows of her palace as the Nyx looked on.
Year 742 of the banishment…
Nightmare Moon gasped with tears in her eyes as she stormed through the rooms of her shadow palace.
“My nightmares have spread to all now, and now everyone has good reason to fear and shun the beautiful night!” Then she sighed deeply. The angrier whispers started. She had just woken up from another ‘nightmare.’
“Yes, the princess of the night is feared now without question. Hmm…” she laughed darkly, “Perhaps, far in the past, poor little Luna could have been saved by love since she was just ignored and rejected. But now there is no hope. Everyone knows what I have done, and everyone hates me for it. There is no turning back. My fate is chosen and sealed.”
She paused, catching sight of the moonlight through a window. “Is there even a way to go back if I wanted?” She blinked once, twice… “No, I’m…I’m certain there’s not…no…” She shook her head…
And then she sighed in rage. “I WANT to be like this! That whole past life was pain, all pain, and now everyone will know that pain and worship Nightmare Moon out of fear! I am a goddess! And when Celestia’s wrath reigns down upon us before our final victory, then everyone will finally know that she has given up on Luna and love, and that Nightmare Moon is supreme in the memory of all! There is no more Luna! I don’t care what the moon and its light holds or how my dreams mock me!” Nightmare Moon held her hoof in the air.
Still, her breaths grew shallow and she lowered her hoof. “Maybe there’s been something to my ‘nightmares’ all of these years though. They’re Luna’s dreams, in a way. Could I possibly fear...defeat?” She had reached the palace entranceway now.
She shook her head. “Shut up!”
She sighed. “But I should prepare in case Celestia’s love does…”
She shook her head. “We are too powerful, our hate burns! The sun will fall!”
She sighed. “Am I a monster?”
She shook her head. “Yes, I wanted to be a monster! It was the only way to rule!”
She sighed. “So there is no hope?”
She screamed. “THERE IS NO HOPE!”
“NYX!” Suddenly her normal tone and gaze returned as Nightmare Moon cried out and galloped over to her minions at their cauldrons. Her eyes flashed. “More Nightmares, more! Nightmare Night is upon us, and I will make this one an evening the ponies shall never forget! I’ll strike such fear into their hearts that even if I fell and that mare I used to be came back, the ponies will run screaming from her! Let me into their dreams and then leave me to my work!” She grinned. “Yes, yes…I am more in control than ever! Let the darkness reign!”
The Nyx edged away uneasily but nodded and opened the portal for her.
Nightmare moon quickly vanished, leaving maniacal laughter in her wake.
The Nyx looked to each other and frowned and shook their heads. They hated this night when their mistress would torture the ponies so, even though they had to let her do so to appease her desire for revenge and to keep off her suspicions about the true nightmare abilities of their powers.
And they also hated how they could feel her corruption of them becoming complete these days. They knew soon that they would no longer care for the safety of the ponies but only for the darkness they had known so long. Even Doran, with her connection to Celestia, was failing inside.
The Nyx sighed in the darkness and waited some more.
The thousandth year of the banishment…
Nightmare Moon sat at the center of her dark kingdom and smiled, her sharp teeth glinting in the light of the moon as her gaze lingered upon the earth. “Any moment now…any moment, I’ll be free. It’s almost over, the thousand years is almost spent, and now my eternal eclipse shall come. I have gained so much power, my hatred has flourished, my minions are as dark and corrupted as I am. I shall destroy the world I came from, Celestia will perish at the hooves of her former sister, and then there will be no more hope and no more love! I am fully prepared for her, she is all there is for me to defeat. Ha!” Mad laughter escaped her, echoing throughout the moon landscape. “And once I am off this accursed rock, my nightmares and the final memory of Luna shall cease.” Her grin grew and she spread her dark wings. “And I will show the sun princess that after a thousand years harmony and love can mean nothing—I will turn her to hating me by showing her that her sister is gone and none of those things could save her. Nothing can save her. I have taken her place.” The light of the moon began to shift, and Nightmare Moon closed her eyes. “Let the final nightmare begin.”
She smiled, waiting for the sense of her freedom…but then cringed. “It doesn’t matter that this will be my first time seeing Celestia in so long. She won’t bring back anything of Luna. Luna is gone. I’m Luna, I’m in control.” She smiled again and nodded. “Yes, any moment now…” But then she cringed once more. “The moonlight almost burns like the sun. I’ve never noticed it but…it’s like something’s releasing, something besides me.” Her smile returned. “But everything that matters here is me. Yes…Yes…Hmm…” Her dark laughter started and grew and spread and echoed. “Yes…IT’S TIME!”
For one perfect moment everything was illuminated.
And then Nightmare Moon was gone in a flash.
But something else did leave the moon that night too, though Nightmare Moon was too enraged and selfish to realize it. Something in the light…a part of someone’s spirit unable to be truly contained in her dark shell. Something banished ‘in’ the moon despite Nightmare Moon’s presence and imprisonment upon the celestial body. Something preserved in love and happiness and warm memory and connected deeply to the moon—something good and innocent that even a thousand years of nightmares could not end.
Nightmare Moon could not escape Luna because she was Luna, as she so often assured herself. But Luna was not her, at least not entirely. And however mad the darkness of the princess of the night had become during the last thousand years, all it would take was a single spark to ignite the light of the full and true Luna and banish the nightmare forever.
Author's Note
My mistake last week--I thought the Chrysalis comic would be this week, but instead we got Luna *Insert Luna smiley that doesn't exist here*. I hope you enjoyed this one. And a great degree of credit to Living Tombstone's release of his FNAF 3 song "Die in a Fire" which really helped put me in the mindset for Luna's ravings and anger. Excellent song.
Hope you all enjoyed this one. Next week--Chrysalis! 
