The Cynic meets The Sensitive
The Cynical Wolf and The Sensitive Sheep
by
Robo00
Chapter One
The Cynic Meets The Sensitive
I learned two things when I moved to Manehattan. One, you have to do anything to succeed. And two, karma's a bitch. The only thing I did wrong was "borrow" some designs from some obnoxious do-gooder. How was I to know my not-so-trusted (I forgot the third thing, trust nopony) former assistant would rat me out. So here I am, my butt planted firmly on a park bench watching googly eyed tramps suck face with their boyfriends.
On another bench across from me, some drab looking mare is sitting and waiting. Grey coat, black mane, and purple eyes? Yeah, good luck standing out in a crowd, toots. And she's wearing a bow tie, too. Geez, she's going for the bronze with that look. Something else caught my eye. A poster.
CALLING ALL FASHION DESIGNERS, screamed the poster. DO YOU HAVE WHAT IT TAKES? Well, I stole it. Does that count? WELL, DO WE HAVE SOMETHING FOR YOU! Do tell, Mr. Poster. ON JUNE 8th, IT'S THE EQUESTRIA FASHION EXPO! The E.F.E? That's in six weeks. If I can whip something up... MUST SUPPLY YOUR OWN MODEL! Crap! There goes that idea. Back to moping.
That grey mare again. Oh, look, she got some sort of boyfriend. No skin off my nose. If Drabby Cakes has a boyfriend, more power to her. Must be rich or something. Drabby is fidgeting on the bench as her boyfriend, a sharp looking unicorn goes over to her. No flowers? What kind of boyfriend is that?
"I-I heard you were interested in me." said Drabby. "Nopony has been interested in me before." That swanky unicorn gave her a big, smarmy smile.
"Of course I'm interested in you." he said, looking smarmier by the milisecond. "I seen you play at the Grand Galloping Gala and right away, I knew I was interested in you." Drabby's face goes beet red at the comment. Ponies like her make me sick! Fawning at every little comment until she gets chewed up and spat out.
"Y-you seen me play?!" said Drabby Cakes. "I-I don't know what to say!" Smarmy smiles at her with that toothy grin of his.
"I do. Miss Pony Pokey!" sneered Smarmy. Drabby looks like she's about to have a heart attack as two other stallions and (what I assume to be) their girlfriends come out from behind the bushes. "Didn't I tell you that she'll fall for it!" He and the others start to laugh their heads off as tears roll down Drabby's cheeks. Like I said, no skin off my nose.
"W-w-why?!" sobbed Drabby. "Why did you do this?"
"It's funny!" cackled Smarmy. "I mean why would any pony be interested in you, the pony who helped ruin the Grand Galloping Gala." The others joined in with their childish taunts. Nothing was off limits. Everything from...whatever happened at the Gala to her boring looks. "Why would I, a stallion who dates supermodels would want you, a childish cello player." It was strange. Suddenly, I growing irritated for some reason. So irritated, as a matter of fact, I walked right up to Smarmy and his buddies.
"Okay, pal." I said, brushing him off. "You and your cronies had enough fun for one night." They all looked at me like I was drunk or something.
"Really?" said one of the skanks that was there with her boyfriend. "Are you sticking up for...that?!" I looked over at Drabby, who was still crying her eyes out. She's not THAT bad looking, just plain looking and boring.
"And what if I am?" I said, jabbing my hoof into Smarmy's chest. Smarmy just shook his head.
"Come on, everypony." said Smarmy, snickering. "Let's leave the two lovebirds alone." And with the last insult in, Smarmy and company turned and started to leave. Did he just imply that I was a fillyfooler?! The nerve! Suddenly, the two skanks stopped short at the poster.
"Look, they're having the fashion expo here." said skank one. "What I would give to be a model in that!"
"Yeah," said skank two. "I heard Rarity and that up and comer Coco Pommel are going to be there." The two skanks rejoined their boyfriends as I tried to process what they just said. Rarity and that traitor, Coco Pommel are going. And they'll have no shortage of applicants wanting to model their clothes. Now I was more pissed off than ever.
"Thank you." croaked a small voice behind me. I turned around and there was Drabby, looking down at the ground. "N-nopony has ever stood up for me before."
"Think nothing of it, uh..."
"Octavia." Geez, her name is as drab as she is. "I'll guess I'll go home now." As Drabby got up, a plan, an ingenuous plan started to form in the back of my mind. And she's the key part of it.
"Wait!" I said, stopping Drabby Cakes in her tracks. "What do you do for a living again?"
"Oh, I play the cello." said Drabby. "Or used to. Ever since the...incident at the Gala, nopony wants to hire me."
"Really?" I said, feigning interest. "Have you considered modelling?" Drabby was about to freak out.
"M-me?!" stammered Drabby. "I-I can't be a model! I'm unattractive!"
"Nonsense." I said, lying my ass off. "You got IT!"
"IT?"
"Yes. Pizzazz! Sex appeal!"
"M-m-m-m-me?! Sexy?!"
"Yep." I said, drawing her in to show her the "big picture". "Picture this! You, on the catwalk, wearing a dress of the finest silk imaginable!"
"Uh..."
"Stallions would want to have you! Mares will look at you in jealousy! Fillies will want to BE you! And all you have to do is be my model at the fashion expo." Drabby looks at me in disbelief.
"I-I don't know..."
"Come on! Don't you get tired of having your name dragged through the mud?! Stick with me and they'll be chanting your name, uh..."
"Octavia."
"Yeah! I can hear it now! The crowds! Octavia! Octavia! Octavia!"
"I-I-I-I-I'll do it!" squeaked Drabby, after getting the courage to speak up. All I could do was smile. Next comes the hard part. Turning this plain piece of bread into a feast! I circled Drabby a couple of times to see what work needed to be done. Hmm. All that gray and black wont help her stand out much. Got it!
"Come on!" I said, taking hold of Drabby. "Let's get going!" Drabby gave me a look that bordered on star raving fear.
"To where?"
"Where else? The library!"
The library closes at 8:00 and it's 7:28. We should be there in fifteen minutes. And we were off! Deftly weaving through traffic and pedestrians alike, we arrived, out of breath at the library. 7:50?! Crud! The clock in the park was slow! I could see some old geezer through the door as she started to lock up for the night. Quickly, I ran up to the door and started banging on it like a lunatic.
"Let us in!" I screamed. The librarian stared at me like I was stupid. "It's not even 8:00 yet!"
"Sorry." said the librarian. "I finished cataloging the books early an' no pony showed up for the past half hour, so..."
"Don't give me that crap, you old battleax! Just let us in!"
"Not with that attitude, missy!"
"Why you..." Just then, Drabby gently stepped up to the door. Lucky for that old nag, because we were about to come to blows!
"Please, madam." said Drabby. "We just need to use your facilities for ten minutes and then we'll leave." That old crone shot Drabby a skeptical look. And with a smile, she unlocked the door.
"All right, deary." said the hag. "Ten minutes."
"Thank you, Miss." said Drabby as we piled into the library.
"Why can't you be like that nice young lady!" said the librarian as she kicked me square in the butt. When I'm back on top, she'll get what's coming to her. Her and everypony else that wronged me. I bolted through the aisles like a madmare looking for books on modeling. Finishing with two minutes to spare, me and Drabby left that book filled crypt they called a library with a buttload of books.
"All right, toots!" I said, handing Drabby some of the books. "Modeling for Morons, How to objectify yourself for fun and profit, How to look hot and make money from it (without being a hooker), I'm sexy and you're not, so now what?" Drabby looked more confused than ever.
"You want me to read all of these?" she said.
"Yep. In one week! We have only six weeks to prepare and most of that is going into making you into a glamor goddess."
"And what will you be doing?"
"Making clothes, dummy! I need the next couple of days to figure out WHAT kind of clothes I'm going make and then I'll get to work!"
"Uh, Miss..."
"Suri. Suri Polomare."
"Miss Polomare. Do you think I can do this?" I gave Drabby another phony smile.
"Honey." I said. "I KNOW you can do this. You just need some confidence." A big, wide smile crossed Drabby's face.
"Thank you, Miss Polomare!" she said, breathlessly. "Thank you for having faith in me!" I nodded and hastily scribbled down my address on an index card.
"I want you to come to my apartment in one week. Got it?"
"Yes. Yes. I won't let you down, Miss Polomare."
And off Drabby went, happy as a clam. Enjoy it why it lasts, Drabby. See, a GREAT fashion designer needs a GREAT model. And while you'll do in a pinch, as soon as I'm on top, you're outta here. I'll be able to hire better models. And they'll make my clothes to die for! Maybe, I'll hire Coco back...as a leg rest! And I'm going to rub my fame right in that Rarity's face!
That's right, world! I'm coming back and you can't stop me!
Simulations, Silly Dreams, and Second Chances
The Cynical Wolf And The Sensitive Sheep
by
Robo00
Chapter Two
Simulations, Silly Dreams, and Second Chances
"No! No! No! No! You're doing it wrong!"
"I'm trying my best, Miss Polomare."
Drabby is starting to get on my last nerve. She is either walking wrong, having the wrong posture, or just plain lacking. Damn! Why couldn't, i dunno, somepony that can follow simple instructions! Or at least, can FREAKIN' READ! I facehoofed as I never facehoofed before!
"This isn't working, you idiot!" I shouted. "You have all the grace of a constipated moose!"
All of the sudden, tears started to roll down Drabby's face. She hiccuped a few sobs and started to cry softly. Geez! Even her crying is annoying! I wanted to toss her out right then and there and hire a GOOD model!
"Why are you attacking me?" said Drabby, softly.
"I'm not attacking you, moron!" That did it! Drabby's tears came down in buckets as she sobbed quietly.
"You ARE attacking me." she whined. The tears continued to flow. I really want to throttle her
"PULL IT TOGETHER, DUMMY! I WON'T HAVE MY DREAMS CRUSHED BECAUSE OF YOU! " I shouted, causing Drabby to hang her head in shame and cry some more. She can really make a pony feel bad at times. "Fine! We'll try again tomorrow." And with her head held low, Drabby slinked out of my apartment, stopping short for a second.
"Um. I hate to ask." said Drabby, not even bothering to turn around. "But what will I be wearing?"
CRAP! I've been too busy trying to turn Drabby into modeling material that I forgot to design clothes for her. And I'm the one who supposed to be the fashion designer!
"Don't worry." I said, lying through my teeth. "I got everything all straightened out." Not looking terribly assured, Drabby left my apartment building. I slumped down on my couch. Think, Suri, Think. The Expo's in a few weeks and you got nothing. What to do. A smart pony (like me) would "borrow" somepony's else creation. But then the morality cops and the real cops get involved. Maybe there's something in my closet I could use.
My closet or as I like to call it, my home away from home. Each one a busted up dream from my past...from when I was stupid. I pulled out a small box that was in the corner. Opening it, I found all of the remnants of my (un) happy foalhood. Geez, why did I have to drag out and open that box. There was a picture of me, mom, and dad. We weren't rich. Actually, we were downright poor. Dad worked long hours at a job that finally killed him. He just keeled over due to his ticker stopped working.
And then there was mom, the eternal optimist. Even when dad died, she always said "Things will get better, sweetheart" with that stupid cheese eating grin on her face. When the kids at school teased me for being poor, she'd always tell me to turn the other cheek, which I did. Shame it didn't help mom any. One day, she went nuts and had to be committed. I guess all that optimism wasn't working.
Getting annoyed, I put away the box of depression and a white box caught my eye. Oh great, I had to run into "it". Another box of bad memories. My first dress and my first business. I was real happy when...that pony...agreed to go into dress making business.
Oh, how I dreamed of that day when I could make clothes that everypony would love. We split everything fifty-fifty. I would design and sew the dresses and she...that pony..would handle the money. We rented a building and set up shop. Nothing could stop us now!
Then...that pony...stole all of my designs and ran off. I couldn't pay the rent, lost the building, and now she's a world renowned fashion designer with stores all over Equestria. And here I am, on the bottom with a drab dingdong for a fashion model.
Tired of remembering crap I want to forget, I decided to go to bed. Then inspiration hit me, literally. One of my old sketchbooks, placed on the top shelf, fell off and beaned me on the noggin. I was about to toss the stupid thing out the window when I noticed the page it landed on. A brainstorm, no, A BRAIN TYPHOON formed. Yep! While Rarity and Coco bore everypony with their boring clothes, I'll dazzle 'em with sex appeal. Now to build up Drabby's confidence and I know how.
Ah! It's a beautiful morning! Today's the day I begin my comeback! I was about to have breakfast when I heard a knock at my door. Yep, it was Drabby, right on cue. Her head was held low (again) as she walked (or more like slumped) into my apartment.
"I-I read the books again, Miss Polomare." she said in that voice that was always on the verge of crying. "A-and I'll try my best to get it right."
"You sure will," I said, thrusting a big plate of pancakes under Drabby's nose with a big grin on my face. Drabby just stared at the plate, with a "I want to eat it but I can't" look on her face.
"Um..." said Drabby. "Are you sure I should be eating such high calorie food. Because I've been reading How to binge and purge your way to a profitable but unhealthy figure, Anorexia made easy and How to be heroin chic for fun and profit and they said..."
"Just eat the pancakes, dummy." I said. Drabby dove into the plate with gusto as I brought out my sketchbook. "By the way, you will be wearing this." I gave the sketchbook to Drabby and she had the expected response. She nearly choked on the pancakes she was eating. Her eyes grew big and she started hyperventilating.
"T-t-t-t-this is...l-l-l..."
"Yep, lingerie! And you're gonna wear it!"
"B-b-b-but all this lace a-and bows and garters and...IS THAT A SADDLE?!" Drabby looked like she was going to throw up (after all those pancakes she ate, I hope it's not in my apartment). I just shrugged at her conniption fit.
"It's just clothes, geez."
"Clothes for the bedroom! Bedroom attire! How can I wear this?! I-it's so...so lewd!" Lewd, huh. That would make for a great marketing slogan. I could see it now! The lewdest clothes in all of Equestria! Heck, I would make big money on the controversy alone!
"Well, get over it!" I said to my nervous model. Now, today, we are going to practice in front of an audience."
"Huh?! Wearing those?!"
"I haven't started making them yet, dummy! Now, meet me at the community center in two hours."
"Well, I..."
"Good!" I shoved Drabby out the door. Now all I need to do is find a faux audience. Or like a wise pony once said, if you can't find an audience, make one! Taking out my scissors, a couple pieces of cardboard, paint, and a tape recorder, I went to work to create the perfect audience.
Like the obedient slave that she was, Drabby arrived right on time. And like always she seemed on the verge of tears (or maybe she always looked and sounded like that). I ran backstage to greet her. We'll have to work fast since in about two hours, we'll be up to our eyeballs in squealing foals.
"I'm here, Miss Polomare." said Drabby. "So what do you want me to do?"
"Easy!" I said. "Just put what you read into practice." I pulled back the curtain on my (crudely done) audience. A small noise threatened to escape Drabby's lips as she looked over my handiwork. Then she dropped to the floor and started laughing. Maybe the googly eyes were a bit much. "What is so funny?"
"I-I'm sorry." said Drabby through her giggling fit. "That cardboard audience looks a little silly." Well, at least she's not hyperventilating.
"Well, excuse me for not being a good artist." I snorted. "Now get your butt behind the curtain so I can introduce you." Drabby nodded and took her place behind the curtain. I turned on the tape recorder for some appropriate music and picked up a nearby microphone.
"Here is Octavia, modeling a white satin and lace set with saddle." Drabby sauntered out from behind the curtain. Her movements still weren't right. Still stilted, boring, and plain unsexy! Great, this lump of coal in pony form is going to make my sexy, cool clothes look bad. I facehoofed (when dealing with Drabby, it's starting to become a thing) and then cut the music off.
"Well," said Drabby with a small smile. "How did I do?"
"Two words. YOU SUCK!"
Drabby looked like she just been stabbed in the chest. "W-what?!" she stammered. "What did I do wrong?!" She was about to start crying again to make me feel bad. But not this time!
"Let's start on the day you were born and work up from there!" I yelled. "You're boring! Have no charisma! Look like a schoolmarm! Have the personality of a tree stump! Not very pretty, and..."
"WHY DON'T I KILL MYSELF! WOULD THAT MAKE YOU FEEL BETTER?!"
Drabby's breathing was ragged as she stared me down. She was crying (again) but now there was some deep seated anger behind it. I stared at her, slackjawed. Nopony has the cantaloupes to talk back to me (well, almost nopony).
"You don't know what it's like," said Drabby, her voice barely a whisper. "Constantly failing, being imperfect, Not living up to expectations. I HATE IT!" She lowered her head. "I-I'm sorry. I-I'll do better next time."
"Get some rest." I said with a sigh. "I got clothes to make so we'll try again in two days, got it?" Drabby nodded and left me alone with my cardboard audience. Imagine if the little juice box drinkers came in and seen her little outburst. Wet floor city.
I returned home to my crummy apartment, Drabby's words still fresh in my mind, "Constantly failing, being imperfect, Not living up to expectations. I HATE IT!" Part of me wanted to tell her to suck it up, that I have problems, too. But then there is the other half. The part of me that actually felt sorry for her.
"You're gettin' soft, Suri." I said to myself. "You know you're gonna dump her the first chance you get." Which is true. There are two types of ponies in this world: The stompers and the stompees and I'm sure I'm not going to be a stompee! Still, Drabby must be going through some issues for her to yell at me like that. My brain was on empty. The expo is in five weeks, I haven't started my clothes, and there is no way I can turn Drabby into a fashion model over night.
My thoughts were interrupted by a knock at the door. If somepony is trying to sell me on "religious salvation", he has another thing coming. Opening the door, I was surprised to see Drabby standing in front of me. She seemed a little nervous, with her tugging at that bow tie of hers.
"Um...hello, Miss Polomare." she said, fidgeting. Heh, reminds me a little bit of Coco.
"Dra...I mean, Octavia, what a surprise!" I said with mock glee. Drabby loosened up a bit, probably sensing my false cheer.
"I came to apologize again for my outburst."
She came all of this way here to that?! All this way just to say "I'm sorry" again?! What is with her? Drabby must have an ulterior motive.
"And..." I said, with more than a bit of suspicion.
"Well...it's kind of a funny story...you see, I ran into the director of the Manehattan Orchestra while I was doing my laundry. We got around to talking about my stalled career and..."
"Get to the point!"
"To make a long story short, the director wants me to audition for the orchestra and I would like you there for my audition."
Figures. All this way because she wants a cheerleader.
"Don't you have any..."
"Friends. Not here. The director is very busy and wants to fast track my audition. I'm afraid they won't make it in time."
"How about your family?"
"..."
"I'm very busy myself so if you don't mind..."
"Please! It's only for an hour or two. You're the only friend I have."
I stared at her for a long time. Drabby considers me a friend, despite knowing me for a week AND chewing her out. You know, at first she reminded me of Coco, a pony (until she stabbed me in the back) eager to please. But looking at her now, I can only see me. The old me. The me I wanted to forget.
"You know," I said, coolly. "Classical music isn't my bag."
"Well, you don't have to listen."
"All I have to do is show up?"
"Yes."
"Fine. I'll come."
Drabby threw herself over me and gave me the biggest hug I ever had.
"Oh, thank you!" she said, almost in tears. "Meet me at the Equestria Municipal Theater tomorrow at 11 in the morning."
I'm too soft. Well, a happy model is a productive model (hopefully). Shuffling back to my workbench, I started on the fashion line that would propel me to stardom. I pulled out boxes of bows and lace, rolls of cloth, a ruler, and my trusty pair of scissors. Through most of the night I worked. Cutting, sewing, and pasting. Several long dinnerless hours later, I was standing in front of six mannequins clad in the fashions that will take me to the top.
"Well, ladies," I said to the silent mannequins. "I've outdone myself." I may be tired and hungry but looking at what I did in seven hours, I have every right to crow about myself. A yawn escaped my lips telling my it was time to hit the hay. I don't want to be late for Drabby's little "recital".
As I crawled into bed, I thought back to Drabby's non answer when I asked about her family. Must be have some sort of feud with them. I thought back to my own mom. That cheerful face and her (almost overly) optimistic attitude.
"Everything will be alright, Suri." she would say to me. That was before the days when the stress finally got to her and her mind broke. Now she doesn't even recognize me anymore. If all of that junk happened after my fall from grace, I would say it's karma catching up to me. But now doing things by the book, maybe I can think the world isn't out to get me anymore.
Maybe.
